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Joseph woke up, the golden glow of the sunrise illuminating the hospital room. Ignoring the dull phantom pains at the stump where his hand should be, he got up. Thank god this was a private hospital – if it was a normal one, the nurses would be absolutely losing it over what he was doing! Suzi had stayed with him through the worst of the healing, monitoring his recovery. She had said it should be fine to walk at this point. Should. That super-charged hamon blow to his knee took very long to heal. Was it healed enough? Would it ever heal properly? Slowly, Joseph tested the waters and took a few small steps forward.
There was pain where the joints had been damaged from the attack, but nothing that was too much for him. He could deal with it. Making sure not to extert himself too much, Joseph slowly walked out of his room, somewhat limping from his injuries.
Suzi had said that Caesar was here too. Caesar. Caesar. That blonde fuck. Always so hot-headed, taking every opportunity to tease and bully him. How could he even pin Joseph up against the wall? His muscles were like toothpicks compared to Joseph's!
...Why was he even lying to himself? Of course Joseph knew why Caesar was able to pin him like that. Joseph would always let him, to see that smug smile of his. Damnit, love. It was a weakness in their rivalry; It gave Caesar the upper hand! Joseph had to quell his feelings, no matter what! Besides, Caesar wouldn't feel the same. Always flirting with women left and right, he clearly was only into them. The feelings had to be destroyed, if only to save him from heartache. Joseph soon found the room Caesar was being kept in, and slowly pushed the door open. He was awake, reading some pizza mozzarella Italian storybook.
Caesar was looking a lot better than before. It was a miracle he survived in the first place. By some massive stroke of luck, when Whammu's barely avoided Divine Sandstorm caused part of the ceiling to collapse, a large chunk of it fell in such a way Caesar could use it as a shield from the rest of the debris. However, the rest of the rubble had weighed the part Caesar was using down, creating a hellish deathtrap. If Joseph hadn't clawed through the rubble in his search as fast as he did...At least he got out with only a few ribs fractured. Hell, he could've gotten almost every bone in his body crushed and Joseph wouldn't have cared. The only thing that mattered was that he was alive. OK.
Caesar looked up from his book. He looked bored. Joseph couldn't blame him. Being bed-bound could be a medieval torture method! Stuck in a single space? With no ability to move much and do things? No thank you!
"How do you feel?" Joseph asked, sitting on the side of Caesar's bed. He laughed – not his usual snooty laugh, but something softer. Warmer, like lemon-honey tea on a winter evening. That laugh...How was Joseph meant to get over his feelings for Caesar if everything he did was so damn loveable?!
"Am I OK? Me? You're the one who fought Kars after he used the red stone!" True, true. But he was The Great Joseph Joestar, the one and only. Of course he'd be fine!
"I'm alright. I got my hand cut off, as you can see, as well as having my knee melted and I almost got shot into space. But other than that I'm as good as can be." Caesar stared at him. Eyebrows raised and the rest of his face completely emotionless, Joseph started to get the feeling that Caesar did in fact not think he was alright.
"You almost got shot into space?" Joseph nodded. "How?" And so, he recounted the whacky events of the last few days; It had ended up taking so long Caesar had sacrificed part of the bed for Joseph to lay beside him.
"What a pathetic way to lose. And that comeback had you written all over it. I don't think anyone else could've beaten Kars except for you." Caesar smiled at Joseph, reaching out and softly rubbing his head. Unlike the first time he did that, the condescending feel to it was absent. The headpat was tentative, filled with care. The rivalry had gone, Joseph realised. All that was left now was pure, unadulterated friendship. Just friendship, and nothing else.
"You're amazing. You know that, JoJo? Even if you make dumb decisions, you always manage to work it out in the end. You've got charm."
"You're charming, too." Joseph returned the compliment. "Why do you think I went easy on you all those battles? I wouldn't dare damage that pretty face of yours!" Joseph immediately realised the mistake he had made in his choice, and hoped Caesar didn't notice.
"JoJo...I never thought you'd say my face was pretty. Do you feel OK? Are you ill?" Caesar joked, though it made Joseph actually feel ill. He picked up on it! He backpedalled his statement.
"I-I don't mean it like that! It's just, uh‐ I'm returning the compliment! I was saying that because I wanted to emphasise how charming you are!"
"Don't mean it like what?" Oh, for fuck's sake. He didn't even take it that way in the first place? Couldn't the world open up and swallow him? Now it looked more obvious!
"...I thought you thought it was a romantic thing. It's not. I'm not in love with you, not at all." Joseph firmly stated, looking away. A bird sung outside, creating an elegant melody Joseph had never heard before.
"Well. Your face is pretty, too." Joseph grinned and looked back at Caesar.
"Of course it's pretty! There's not a single flaw on this sexy body of mine." Caesar groaned, burying his face in his hands.
"Oh my fucking god. You are really thick in the head."
"Hm?"
"I love you too! I knew you accidentally said about my face being pretty in a romantic way! I did the exact same thing to tell you that I loved you back! Joseph Joestar, you're going to be the end of me!" Any confidence Joseph had about being very smart was thrown out the window of a very tall building, and it hurtled to its death, leaving a very cartoon-like splat on the floor. How did he not even notice? How–
Wait.
Caesar liked him back?!
Caesar had sounded sincere. This...this probably wasn't a joke. Holy shit. Holy fuck. This was actually happening. Not in a daydream fantasy of Joseph's. This was real life. Caesar Fucking Antonio Zeppeli just said that he liked him back. Though, Joseph did have a question.
"How come you didn't tell me earlier?" He asked. "You're always flirting with women. I never thought you'd like me back." Caesar rested his hand on Joseph's shoulder. Joseph noticed that Caesar was subtly moving himself closer to him.
"I didn't want to ruin our...our relationship. Our rival-friendship." The two gazed at each other. Caesar's eyes glinted in the sunlight. They were a wild green that reminded Joseph of the scrawny plants that grew inbetween the pavements. Despite everything that was put in place to stop them, those plants still pushed through, and thrived. His hair seemed to glow in the light. He was mystical, ethereal. Like an angel. Instinctively, Joseph cupped Caesar's face in his hands. Leaning closer, he–
Joseph paused.
"Do you wanna–" Caesar gave his answer by pulling Joseph into a deep kiss.
Caesar's lips were dry, likely because he hadn't drank anything in a while. Yet, they had an almost silk-like quality, one that Joseph would never forget.
The flame of his love for Caesar burned ever brighter, the kiss acting as as kindling. Every part of Joseph's body was in bliss, the pains in his knee and stump forgotten. Joseph had had his fair share of kisses – sloppy drunken ones with women at very illegal house parties when he was still attending school. None of them compared to this. They went still, savouring the kiss until they felt like they'd suffocate.
After an eternity (and yet, a second at the same time) had passed, the two broke the kiss. Now, Joseph didn't really know what to do. He didn't think he'd get this far.
"You're a better kisser than I thought, JoJo." Caesar praised, breathless.
"Does– Does this mean that we're in a relationship now? Like, we both just confessed our love and kissed." That's how it happened in the romance books. And all fiction is based on reality, one way or another.
"Yes. I want to be in a relationship with you, and I'm sure you want to be too." That was way easier than how Joseph thought it'd be. Love was meant to be a struggle, a battle. And he had gotten what he wanted with no struggle or battle at all! Man, was he lucky.
Years passed, and they had formed a nice family. Suzi had happily let Joseph have kids with her, and so they now had a daughter – Holly Kujo. She had fallen in love with a Japanese jazz player (the nerve! How was he meant to see his own daughter often if she was halfway across the world?!) and had a child of her own, Jotaro. Caesar and him were grandparents. An odd thing for someone of the Joestar bloodline to have. Today it was his fifth birthday, and the two had made sure to be there especially early. It would be grand! He had gotten to the age of five, and no tragic thing had happened whatsoever! The terrible fate of the Joestars really had gone and died when Joseph shot Kars off to space.
Being the grandparents they were, Joseph and Caesar bought Jotaro the most extravagant and expensive gifts they could find. Joseph may have gone an eensy-weensy bit overboard on the amount he spent on the realistic and life-sized Olive Ridley Sea Turtle statue, but hey! Grandsons were special, Jotaro in particular because they barely ever saw him. Besides, two-thousand pounds wasn't that much, was it? Caesar was just being stingy, obviously! Growing up poor surely had its toll on him.
Caesar and Joseph had taken the whole thing very seriously; Even choreographing a whole performance for him, they practiced until they were assured it was the best it could be.
And now, standing in front of their grandson, they performed the real thing.
The two used their hamon to create a magic spectacle like no other. Caesar flaunted his bubble abilities, making stars out of them. The divine hum of the hamon reverberated throughout the room. Joseph used his hamon as a sort of magnetism, pulling off fantastical magic tricks with them. Both of them worked to mix their different acts together. Jotaro sat there with his mouth agape, mesmerised. His sea-green eyes shone with awe.
As the performance ended, they combined their hamon to mimick shooting stars (light pollution meant it was harder to see them now. Jotaro had always wanted to but never could). Joseph and Caesar faced each other and held hands. Their hamon collided, glowing and sparking. And yet to Joseph, Caesar's face seemed to glow brighter. Face a spitting image of himself from thirty-eight years ago, he was the sun, the moon...all the stars in the universe in one. Or, he was a black hole, consuming anything that came close. It had been around fourty-five years since Joseph had first fallen in love with him, and he still consumed his thoughts like he had done all those years ago. Now instead of the thoughts being mere fantasies of what they'd do together if they were in a relationship, they were things that Joseph wanted to do with him in the future. Some were little things such as "I want to cook Caesar some pancakes and bacon for breakfast and serve it to him in bed!". Others were bigger things, such as "When marriage between men is legal, I'll propose to him, and we'll have the best wedding to exist!". Though, that last one was likely just going to be a pipe dream forever. Who even made that illegal? It's dumb!
They finished the performance, keeping their breath and posture steady. Jotaro trembled with joy, clapping his hands together fast and hard enough to make Joseph concerned for his palms.
"Jiji! Handsowme! Again!" Caesar grimaced slightly at his nickname. Joseph had found it funny – Just like how Jotaro had picked up the nickname "Jiji" from the nickname "Jojo" that Caesar called him by, Jotaro had picked up that nickname from the excessive use of the word "handsome" to describe Caesar on Joseph's behalf. Caesar would always nearly visibly die inside when Jotaro called him that. Joseph was sure the nickname would grow on him in time.
"Doing these cool things takes a lot of energy, Little JoJo..." Caesar tried to reason with Jotaro. Then, Jotaro pulled out his most deadly weapon. He hugged Caesar's legs and looked up with big puppy dog eyes, pouting.
"Please? Pretty please with all the flavours of ice-cream and a cherry on top?" Jotaro had never used this weapon on Caesar before, always using it on Joseph when nobody else was around, and Joseph was pretty sure Jotaro only did it to him and him alone because he knew that Joseph had a heart softer than the pillows in bedstores, and would be guaranteed to break at the act. He watched with curiosity. Would this tactic work with Caesar? He wasn't as soft hearted as Joseph was. Caesar's eyes darted away from Jotaro's and to Joseph's, begging for help. When Joseph was unable to provide advice, Caesar looked back at Jotaro, defeat written all over his face.
"Well, just one more time. One time and no more after that. OK, Little JoJo?" He sighed. Grinning a somewhat malevolent grin, Jotaro thanked them and sat down, ready to watch the dance again. The tiny devil was fully aware of the power that begging held, and he knew how to use it well.
They performed way more than the one Caesar promised.
The past fifty days had been fun, in a way. Joseph, Caesar, Jotaro and other allies they had made along the way stood outside Dio's mansion. Stand users had tried to stop them left and right on their journey here, but they had prevailed with no losses. Even with Caesar not having a stand, he had held his own in fights well. Not that Joseph expected any less of him. Unlike him, Caesar had actually continued his hamon training past just breathing properly, learning new battle tactics. Jotaro had made friends for once in his life, also an up of the trip. Well, he did like Kakyoin a little bit more than one would like a friend. Alas, Joseph and Caesar's paired attempts to get them to date resulted on nothing. Jotaro had said that he wasn't in love, but Joseph knew otherwise. He had to be! He'd realise eventually. Unless he was just hiding his feelings in case the trip went badly to avoid pain. That was a very Jotaro thing to do.
The shadowy mansion towered over them, radiating a malicious aura. The group had already come up with a plan – Avdol would use his stand, Magician's Red, to burn the mansion to ashes. The sun was setting, already casting a fiery orange hue on the building. They had to act fast, before Dio got the advantage. Once he was killed, the Joestar family would truly be rid of any vampire scourge in their lives. It started with Dio. It would end with Dio.
Magician's Red set the mansion ablaze, the fire consuming the building at a blinding speed. Like a fox being smoked out of its den, Dio quickly revealed his burning self to the group. Rubble cast shadows on the battlefield, protecting Dio from the sun.
"You Joestars and your allies-!" He snarled, barely understandable through the crackling of the flames. "This fire is nowhere near powerful enough to defeat me! You fools!" His stand, The World, materialised. An emotionless expression on its face, it moved forward with a golden fist clenched. Caesar and Kakyoin were too crafty for Dio to ever compare, however! Caesar had been setting up his bubble barrier subtly for a while, and Kakyoin had already set a trap with Hierophant Green. The World was ensnared in the tentacles, and the sun's rays refracted off of the bubbles. Caesar made sure not to make a blindspot this time. Dio, frozen in place by the beams of the sun, couldn't do a thing. Everyone took turns dealing their part of the coup de grace.
Avdol had already had his part, decimating Dio's sanctuary and burning him to a crisp.
Polnareff imbued all his rage and just feelings into Silver Chariot's rapier, shooting off the end into Dio.
Kakyoin made sure Dio felt the suffering he had put him through tenfold with every emerald of the Emerald Splash.
Iggy mauled Dio's arm with The Fool, tearing it off with ease. Detached from the body, it lost the ability to regenerate, leaving only charred bones.
Jotaro dealt a harsh blow to Dio's chest with Star Platinum, shouting his iconic "ORA!".
Joseph, as the oldest living Joestar, was given the honour of finishing the job. Wrapping Hermit Purple around the flaming beast, he sent the entirety of his hamon flowing through. Dio's body crumbled away, leaving nothing but the scorched remains of his clothes. And like that, it was done. Nobody would suffer at Dio's hands again.
It was in the year 2000, a year after all the chaos with that Morioh stand outbreak, when Jotaro came out to them. He took the effort to travel all the way to their place (around a two hour drive) and sat them down at their table. Face completely serious, Joseph gained anxious butterflies in his stomach. What was this important?
"Jiji. H– Caesar." He started. Embarrassed by the nickname as he grew up, Jotaro began to call Caesar by his name. Just like Joseph predicted, Caesar missed Jotaro calling him Handsowme. Sometimes, you only know how much you appreciate something after you've lost it. Maybe they'd find another great nickname for Caesar one day.
"I feel like I should tell you this. I'm aroace. I don't like boys, or girls. I don't like anyone that way." He put bluntly, and awaited a response. That was the first time Joseph had heard of anything like that. But, he had fought vampires and Pillar Men – he was in no place to dismiss Jotaro. He believed Jotaro, anyways. Though he didn't have a word for it, after the trip to kill Dio, that concept lingered in the back of Joseph's mind. That had to be the only reason he didn't fall in love with Kakyoin. Caesar laughed.
"Oh! I thought it was going to be something serious, like another stand incident popped up." Jotaro shook his head.
"No, nothing like that. That's all I wanted to tell you."
"Well, I'm happy you trust us with that information! We'll accept you no matter what, Jotaro." For once, Jotaro smiled. Only a small, near impossible to notice one. A smile nonetheless.
"Count yourself lucky. You'll never date anyone like Joseph." Caesar pulled a smirk as Joseph crossed his arms.
"Well, you'll never date anyone like Caesar, so you're good." He huffed.
"You think I'm bad? When you are the one behind the nut incident?" Oh, he did not just bring that up.
"They looked like peanuts! It's not my fault!"
"You were in the pitch-black dark eating out the fucking coffee pot and you didn't even notice!"
"Do you think I know what a peanut tastes like?!"
"You've never eaten a peanut before?!"
"I thought it would taste different from peanut butter! Because it's not actually peanuts, you know?" Caesar stared at him, mouth agape.
"I- I actually have no idea how I'm in love with you sometimes." He muttered, burying his face in his hands. Jotaro tipped the hat he always wears.
"You two are a fucking mess." He said. "Never change."
Later on, Joseph took the time to look at information on being aroace using the great contraption called The Internet. None of it made too much sense (what was a SAM? And amatonormativity? The hell did that mean? How did you even pronounce it?) but he knew Jotaro would appreciate it. Jotaro did, when Joseph came to him to ask for corrections on things he didn't understand. Jotaro was happy that he put in the effort. Joseph would make sure to take interest in the things Jotaro was into or part of in the future. He was his beloved grandson, after all.
It was a chilly winter night. Hamon couldn't stop aging forever, and the effects of time had begun to show itself on Joseph and Caesar. Despite this, Joseph couldn't sleep. He simply wasn't tired, rarely ever was. And if Joseph couldn't sleep, neither would Caesar.
"Caesar, I just thought of something." Caesar growled the way he does when he's annoyed, but not annoyed enough to take action against the perpetrator.
"I want to sleep." Ignoring Caesar's protests, Joseph continued.
"Say, if Whammu was dating Esidisi and Kars..."
"Go on." Caesar sighed. Joseph held back a snicker.
"Wouldn't that make him...poly-Whammu-rous?" Caesar grunted and turned away from Joseph, dragging the quilt from him too. Once hit with the vicious bite of the winter cold, Joseph regretted his actions. He should've saved that pun for later! Gently, he tugged on the quilt.
"Caesar! I'm sorry! Please can I have my part of the quilt back?" Caesar quietly hummed, as if he was weighing out the pros and cons. After debating, he set the quilt back on the bed like it should be, instead of clumped on his side.
"You'll just pester me until I give in, won't you?" A little smile crept up Joseph's face, as that's exactly what he was planning. Joseph shuffled up to Caesar and brought the quilt up to his neck. Leaning over a little, he planted a small kiss on Caesar's cheek.
"Love you."
"I love you too, JoJo." Joseph stayed silent the rest of the time he was awake, despite the time spanning a couple of hours at the very least. He cared enough to not plague Caesar every hour of the day, and to actually let him sleep.
Yes, he was also staying silent in fear of losing quilt privileges again. But only a little bit (a lot).
The wind outside howled, and the room was soon filled with the rhythmic breaths of Caesar. The room smelled of rosemary, thanks to an incense Caesar bought. It had been ninety-seven years since they had started dating.
Even with his constant chaotic stream of thoughts, Joseph had been at peace ever since then.