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The Traveller is a person with many skill sets. Some of his skills are useful, like knowing how to fight an army of hilichurls armed with nothing but his fists, and how to perfectly cook a slab of meat found in a ruin with no one knowing exactly how long it has been in there. Some of his other skills are slightly questionable, like remembering the favourite food of every cat and dog in Mondstadt and Liyue, and how to tenderise meat from a boar that went extinct centuries ago with nothing more than his fists. Out of all his skill sets however, babysitting two gods, who just so happened to be him and his sister from another world, was definitely not one of them.
“Paimon, I’m just saying that if I had a mora every time I met myself from another world, I would have two mora, which is not a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice.”
It all started when the Traveller, Aether, was walking down the streets of Mondstadt as Paimon was chatting animatedly about what they had for breakfast when two children fell on top of Aether. It was not even due to his disability that he failed to see the two children but rather who would have expected children, of all things, to fall out of the sky?
“Wait, if the two of you have wings, then how did both of you fall out of the sky?” Paimon asked.
The twin travellers stared at her, looked at each other, turned back to stare at Paimon, and simultaneously shrugged.
The biggest injustice was the fact that Paimon, rather than being concerned for her friend’s well-being and status from being knocked down from the top by two children, was gushing over how cute the children were.
The children were thankfully fine, albeit very confused and slightly ruffled at their impromptu collision. Aether was also thankfully fine but no one asked him, so he was left to pout at the corner of the Knights of Favonius headquarters where most of the higher ranking knights and Paimon ignored him and were gushing over how cute and adorable the small travellers were.
“Aw, Aether, you’re so cute when you were young! Your sister too!” Paimon said, patting both small Aether and small Lumine on the head.
“I’m still cute now!” Aether argued back, only to blush in embarrassment when he realised what he just said.
The twins explained that they had found a strange portal in the sky and when they touched it out of curiosity, they were sucked into the portal and thrown out into this world. It was just a coincidence that the first person that landed on happened to be the Aether of this world, who was also thankfully much more durable compared to the rest of the denizens of Teyvat. Really, they were not knocking people over on purpose!
With the explanation out of the way, the twins would need someone to look after them during their stay in this world. Aether was automatically voted in favour of babysitting them.
“I don’t even get a say in this!?” Aether exclaimed loudly.
“You would have the most experience looking after yourself and your sister,” Jean pointed out, to which Aether had no counter argument for.
It was fortunate for Aether that Amber volunteered to help Aether look after the twins with him because Paimon could not be entrusted with anything related to responsibilities. They left the Knights of Favonius headquarters with the twins following closely behind them.
“Where should we go?” Aether asked while Amber closed her eyes to think of a good and fun location to bring the twins to.
“Why don’t we ask them?” Amber said in the end.
Before we move on, let us first start with a short backstory.
When Aether was young, he had been a rather curious child. He loved to explore every nook and cranny, squeezing himself through any hole that looked like it could contain some hidden treasure. Lumine had been easy to be roped into his antics, easily sharing the same curiosity he held. The two had been terrible at holding any focus or keeping their attention when something or someone had bored them, leading to them usually sneaking out from under the eyes of any would-be babysitter with the miserable task of ensuring they remained in the spot they were supposed to be.
So when Amber shrieked loudly and Aether used his Elemental Sight to find the twins, only to see nothing but an empty space. He only felt resignation for what fate has in store for him. At least he would not be suffering this fate alone.
…Wait, where did Paimon go?
Somewhere in Windrise, the Statue of Seven glowed and the twins appeared in a blink of an eye. Paimon tumbled to the ground, having been taken along for the ride when she had grabbed hold of the twins.
“You guys should be staying together with Aether, not teleporting away just because you felt like it!” Paimon scolded the twins who looked down guiltily.
“We’re sorry,” the twins chorused together, their voices sincere in their reflection for their actions. “We could go back and bring big brother Aether here, we’ll be really quick!”
With a blink of an eye, the twins vanished right in front of her and Paimon regretted ever agreeing to babysit the twins with Aether and Amber.
Unfortunately for everyone involved, Aether had left the city of Mondstadt to search for the twins in the outer areas of the region while Amber continued her search in the city. That left everyone unaware of anyone’s current location which also meant that the twins were somehow, wonderfully and also unfortunately, left very much unsupervised by anyone. Also unfortunately for everyone involved (except the twins), it so happened that Venti walked by, found the twins walking down an empty alley, and was immediately smitten by the very cute and also very adorable child version of Aether and Lumine.
It was a very important fact to note that Venti, having stolen alcohol from the Dawn Winery since the wee hours of the morning and bar-hopping as soon as that pile ran out, was very much drunk when he found the twins.
Many bad decisions were made.
“Aw Aether! You found your sister! And both of you are so small! What a strange fate both of you had befall. Say, shall we visit the old blockhead? He would appreciate seeing your adorable states!”
As there were no responsible adults within their nearest vicinity, the twins readily and enthusiastically agreed to Venti’s suggestion.
Somewhere in Springvale, Aether wondered why a blind guy like him was looking for lost children.
Meanwhile, in Liyue, the sun was shining, the clouds were drifting, and the weather was perfect for a nice cup of tea. The pot of tea was freshly and perfectly brewed to the right temperature, the cups made from the finest ceramic prepared right beside the teapot. Zhongli raised a cup of tea to his lips to take a sip…and his head slammed onto the table when Venti fell on top of him from the sky.
“Whoops,” Venti said once he realised who was beneath him.
“Barbatos,” Zhongli growled out from beneath Venti. “You have five seconds to get off me before I remind you how I won the Archon War.”
The twins were at least smart enough to get out of the way when a (retired) war god is down on a path of destruction. Venti, on the other hand, could use some of that intelligence.
(At least he was very well-versed in the art of evasive manoeuvres.)
Once Zhongli was sufficiently calmed down after taking out his annoyance on Venti, Venti managed to sit his friend down to show the traveller twins off to him. Zhongli was absolutely smitten with the traveller twins, his rage completely disappeared at the sight of the adorable children. He was so smitten with the children, that he promptly kidnapped them to show them off to the other adepti.
Venti was very much not amused.
While the two (retired) Archons were playing ‘capture the flag’ with two children as the flags, Aether and Amber regrouped in the Knights of Favonius headquarters panicking and empty-handed. Jean ordered a country-wide search, deploying every available knight she could possibly spare. The adventurer’s guild had picked up on the Traveller’s lost children and immediately put out a bounty for their safe return. The rest of the people of Mondstadt, once they found out about the lost children, began searching all over the city for them.
“You must be worried for your son and daughter, but never fear, the adventurer’s guild is on the case! Don’t worry Aether! We’ll find your children soon!”
“My what!?”
No one realised that their efforts were all in vain. To be fair, no one had expected their (retired) patron Archon to kidnap the children into another country in one of his many drunken stupors.
At the same time, the twin travellers were having the time of their life being carried around by Zhongli as the chaotic wind controlled by Venti attempted to capture the (retired) Geo Archon. It was like playing catch except with tornadoes and rock spikes!
Although most of the carnage caused by the impromptu ‘capture the flag’ took place far away from any civilisation in Liyue, the adepti were quick to be alerted to the destruction. The adepti, or rather an adeptus, mainly Xiao, who was tasked by Morax (or Rex Lapis depending on your preference) to protect Liyue from threats. Xiao, who had done his job well for centuries, was now questioning if his contract to the Geo Archon would consider the (retired) Geo Archon as a threat. As he watched a tornado drive a small gorge into the once lush grassland of Guili Plains, he wondered if the contract would also consider the (retired) Anemo Archon as a threat.
What he did notice were the two children screaming in the (retired) Geo Archon arms.
(They were squealing in happiness but you must forgive Xiao for the misunderstanding, it was very hard to tell from all the noises of rocks breaking and the howling wind from the tornadoes.)
Without thinking, Xiao put on his mask and dove into the chaos to snatch the twin travellers away. The twins squealed again in happiness at the sudden lurch in motion as Xiao teleported himself with the twins in his hand a distance away from the fight. The two (retired) Archons paused in their attempts to maim each other with their respective elements and zeroed in on Xiao’s presence.
“Again! Again!” the twins chorused in Xiao’s arms and Xiao could only look down at them in bafflement.
Thankfully, his interruption seemed to be the catalyst that put an end to this childish quarrel between the two (retired) Archons. Unfortunately, for some inexplicable reason, the twin travellers refused to relinquish their hold on Xiao. No matter how much pleading and bribery the two (retired) Archons tried on the twins, they refused to let go. Even when Xiao asked very nicely if they could please kindly let go, the twins only held on tighter.
“It would seem that there is no way we can separate them from you. As such, we decided to entrust their lives and safety to you,” Zhongli said while Venti nodded in agreement behind him.
Xiao had many things he wished to say to that, mainly the word ‘no’. Unfortunately for him, it was an order by his lord and so, he must obey, even if he must subject himself to the whims of the twins in his arms.
“Don’t worry Xiao, I’m sure you’ll make a fine babysitter.”
(Xiao wondered if it was too late to resign from his job.)
Meanwhile, Aether sat in the middle of Albedo’s camp, wondering how he managed to end up here without any guide. He continued to ponder the question as he sipped the hot chocolate that Albedo had made for him and wondered offhandedly where Paimon was and what she was up to now.
Back in Liyue, Xiao, with nowhere in mind to go, returned to Wangshu Inn with the twins in tow. He dumped them on the balcony at the top floor and crouched in front of them to examine them closely. The twins were happy to let him watch them as they played with his hair.
The first thing Xiao noted was that Aether was tiny. The second thing he noted was that Aether had found his sister. The third thing he noted was that Aether was not blind.
“Did the curse revert your age?” Xiao asked, gently removing the twins' hands from his hair.
“Do you mean big brother Aether? Is he cursed? We can help!”
With a blink of an eye, the twins disappeared right in front of him.
Xiao blinked his eyes again, just to be sure it was not a trick of the light. He stood up slowly and leaned out against the railing of the balcony. Well, it was nice to know that he had a somewhat good life before Morax came to kill him for losing the twins in five minutes.
The waypoint west of Starglow Cavern glowed and the twin travellers appeared right in front of it. Coincidentally, at the same time, a Fatui patrol had been passing through the area when their attention was drawn by the glow of the waypoint and the twins who appeared with it. After a quick discussion amongst themselves, they decided to bring the twins back to their camp for safety. Dragonspine was no place for lost children after all.
“Well hello there children, this place is a little dangerous don’t you think?” the patrol leader said, crouching down before the twins to make himself seem less intimidating.
“You moron! They’re going to think you’re kidnapping them if you say it like that!” the circin mage of the Fatui patrol said.
“Shut up!” the patrol leader shouted at his comrade before turning back to the children. “We’re not kidnapping you, we’re just going to bring you to our camp where you can get warm, okay?”
“You do sound like you’re kidnapping them,” the cryogunner legionnaire of the Fatui patrol said.
“Either you shut up or you help me!”
Before anyone could reply, the patrol leader was kicked in the face and sent flying into a pile of snow. The rest of the patrol members, to their credit, reacted quickly and brought out their weapons to confront the attacker.
“Stay away from my children!” Aether shouted as he unleashed a tornado at the rest of the Fatui patrol.
The twin travellers cheered as they watched a feral Aether beat the living daylights out of the Fatui. The Fatui were quick to retreat, rescuing their leader out of the pile of snow and running away with their tails tucked behind their legs. Aether was still breathing hard from his impromptu workout but he relaxed his stance and flicked his sword away to stow it behind his back.
“Impressive,” Albedo said, seemingly appearing out of nowhere and standing beside the twins. “However, I was not aware that you have children.”
“They are not my children!” Aether protested, walking towards the twins and checking if they were okay (not that he could see even with Elemental Sight).
“Right,” Albedo said, not once believing what Aether said as he watched Aether check on the twins like a mother hen.
Aether managed to convince the twins to return Mondstadt with him and Albedo and during the entire journey back, the twins babbled on about their adventures to Aether and Aether listened attentively to them while ensuring a firm grasp on the children. He was not letting them teleport away on another grand adventure again.
…Where was Paimon anyway?
Somewhere at the summit of Dragonspine, Paimon was freezing cold and hungry. She had no idea how she managed to end up at the top of a mountain but she would really like to get down now, preferably to some place warm and with a lot of delicious hot food.
“Someone get Paimon down from here!” Paimon screeched loudly to the empty mountain.