Work Text:
AITA for using the scientific method?
Whenever I don't understand something, I like to make sure that I'm verifying it with facts and logic instead of just following it blindly like a herd of sheeple. A theory is a proposition, something that could be true. A hypothesis is then stated in order to test, and prove (or disprove) the theory. And a law is a truth that is fundamental about a subject matter and which has been proved through experimentation.
So naturally, I conducted my own experiment to test the bounds of something I had been curious about for a while. And that being, the full extent and limitations of what appears to be a supernatural occurance.
Now you may be thinking, "but wait the supernatural and science don't mix" which is exactly why I went ahead with my experiments.
Of course, for every experiment sometimes there needs to be some sacrifices made in the name of science. Namely, a butler here or there. But they signed up to be our butlers, or other distinguished staff, and their contracts had that they were to follow our every request.
My first experiment was a success and I was able to prove that a refusal to comply with the supernatural being's wishes 4 consecutive times in a row would result in a death of the denier as well as their acquaintences.
My second experiment proved inconclusive. This experiment was to determine if the supernatural being could kill a designated person as the request. Unfortunately there were many factors I had not considered in this experiment. Some of them being that although a name could be provided to the being, perhaps it wouldn't know how to locate said person specifically, as the searching mechanism was not based on identity in such a way. This seems to be a topic I would like to research further, as it is rather interesting that according to experiment one the being will kill the denier as well as people close to them, suggesting that names aren't as important to find the victims so much as emotional connection.
My third experiment was to procure an item from a wish and see how it would get delivered. Unfortunately, this experiment was rather simple, as I wished for a new model of a computer and promptly acquired one via shipment. I was disappointed with the lackluster result and wish to further this experiment to ask for increasingly challenging items to recieve, however I will need to employ more butlers to do so as I do not wish to suffer the debt of the wishes.
Edit: The butlers are expendable, they know what they're getting into when they sign their contracts. Yes, it's in fine print but they should make sure to scan the documents carefully before signing their lives away.
Edit 2: Ignore the insolent child in the comments claiming to be my brother.
Edit 3: My experiments aren't flawed! I just haven't run many of them! See this proves I'm NTA because you guys are trying to convince me to run more of them.
Edit 4: STOP ASKING ME TO WISH AWAY WORLD HUNGER. I GET IT. YOU THINK YOU'RE A GOOD PERSON.
Edit 5: DO NOT RESPONF TO THE ANNOYING KID IN THW COMMENTS HE IS NOT MY BROTHRR