Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“I just don’t see -” 

“Henderson.” 

“How someone as good-looking as you -”

“Shut it, Henderson.”

“With your track record-” 

“Hen-der- son !” 

“Can’t make it past the first date with a girl.” 

“Dustin, for the love of god, either shut up or go home because I have had enough of you for today,” Steve groaned. 

“I’m trying to go home,” Dustin said, leaning into the gap between the driver and passenger’s seat. “But that’s proving difficult because you are supposed to be driving me there, Steven .” 

Steve flicked the bill of Dustin’s hat. 

“Smart-ass,” he mumbled, starting the car. 

Dustin was right because he was always right. It was Steve’s turn to drive Dustin home from Hellfire Club (as was every other night they had a meeting), but it was Dustin’s fault they had yet to leave the parking lot because he insisted on going in on Steve about his love life the second he had gotten into the car. It would have been annoying on any other day, but to add insult to injury, Dustin had to make a scene on one of the rare nights Steve was giving Eddie a lift home, too. It was just his luck that Munson would be there to bear witness to his humiliation. 

“Seatbelt, Henderson.”

“Steve, it’s only a five minu-”

“Seat. Belt.” 

“Eddie’s not wearing one!”

“Eddie, can you help me out here?”

“Hey. Henderson. Cool it,” Eddie said, smiling at Dustin with lazy amusement from where he knelt in the passenger’s seat. He rest his chin on the headrest. “You’re too hard on your dear, old dad.”

“I meant, like, sit down on your ass and lead by example. And I’m not his da-”

“Sh-sh-sh-sh,” Eddie said, his ring-clad hand shooting out to cover Steve’s mouth. “He’s like your brother-son. Right, Henderson?” 

“Um. Sure?” Dustin agreed. “Which is why I care that you haven’t found anyone, Steve, I mean you aren’t even trying .”

“Listen, kiddo, I know you’re dying for a new stepmom, but you gotta lay off. Dating isn’t easy for the best of us, and Harrington’s ugly mug doesn’t help,” Eddie said, using the hand that had been covering Steve’s mouth to squeeze his cheeks. “Does it, Stevie?”

Steve glared at Eddie as the other boy manually shook his head in the negative with the hand gripping his face. 

“Quit it,” Steve said, taking a hand from the wheel to pry Eddie’s fingers from his face, trying to rub away the strange tingle they left in their wake. 

“What are you talking about? Every girl in a twenty-mile radius thinks Steve is a – what’s the word they use?” Dustin asked.

“Dreamboat,” Eddie supplied. 

“Yeah, a dreamboat,” Dustin said.

“Dustin, for someone so good at using sarcasm, you really suck at picking up on it,” Steve replied, before shooting Eddie an anxious look. “That was sarcasm, right?” 

“Don’t worry, sweetheart, I think you’re just as dreamy as everyone makes you out to be. Dreamier, even,” Eddie said, smiling as he leaned across the gap between their seats to get right in Steve’s face as he spoke. Steve looked at Eddie long enough to roll his eyes (long enough to be thoroughly shaken by how bright his smile was – how could one person be so sunny all the god damned time?) and trained his gaze back on the road. 

Eddie hovered in his space for a few moments longer. It was funny. If it were anyone else, except maybe Robin, the closeness would have annoyed him to no end. He had never met anyone who had a looser grasp on personal space than Eddie; it was like he thought you couldn’t hear him unless he was so close your noses were almost touching. But he didn’t mind so much with Eddie. He didn’t mind at all, actually. Weird, he thought to himself, and not for the first time when it came to Eddie Munson. 

He felt more than heard Eddie laugh through his nose before he pulled away, turning back to Dustin. 

“You focus on your radio wave romance and let Steve worry about Steve. How about that?” Eddie said. 

“Yeah, how about that?” Steve parrotted, catching Dustin’s eye in the rearview. 

Dustin seemed to consider it as they pulled to a stop in front of his house. 

“I just want you to be happy -” Dustin began.

Steve didn’t let him finish because they had had this conversation before, had it once a week for the past few weeks, and he was tired of it. 

“I am happy – and busy with your sorry asses asking me to drive you everywhere-”

“Actually, Harrington, you offer to drive us everywh-”

“Eddie, zip it. Who’s side are you on?” Steve hissed, smacking Eddie’s shoulder. 

Eddie leaned back against the passenger door and pouted. 

“Anyway, I’m fine, ” Steve continued. “Hard to be lonely when you assholes won’t leave me alone.” 

“Okay, okay,” Dustin conceded, making to get out of the car. “I’m riding my bike to Mike’s after school tomorrow, so you don’t need to pick me up.” 

“See ya later, kid,” Eddie said. 

“Bye, Eddie. Night, Steve,” Dustin said.

“Night, Dustin,” Steve said as Dustin closed the door. 

He let out a sigh as they watched Dustin get safely inside before driving away. 

He pulled back out into the street and started towards Eddie’s.

Eddie spoke up after a few minutes silence.

“Your parents out of town again?” Eddie asked. 

“Obviously,” Steve said. 

“Did you mean what you said to Dustin?” 

“Which thing?” Steve asked.

“That you don’t get lonely. Wayne and I practically live on top of each other and even I get lonely. I can’t imagine what it’s like going home to that big empty house every night,” Eddie clarified.

Steve laughed humorlessly. 

“There are worse things in the world, I’m sure. In fact, I know there are because I’ve seen them,” Steve said. “I can bear a little loneliness as long as I know that the kids are okay. And Robin. And you. And everyone, I guess.” 

“You can’t live your life for everyone else forever, Steve,” Eddie said.

“No, not forever. But for now, it’s alright.”

He saw Eddie nod out of the corner of his eye as he pulled into the trailer park. He pulled up behind Eddie’s van and cut the engine. 

“You wanna come in? Hang out?” Eddie asked, gathering his things from the floor of the car. 

“Not tonight, Eds. Thanks, though,” Steve said. Normally he would have said yes, but Eddie had a look in his eye that told Steve he was apt to get introspective, and Steve just didn’t want to talk anymore. 

Eddie nodded again.

“Thanks for the ride. And you’re welcome over anytime. Don’t even have to call first. Just show up,” Eddie said, getting out of the car. 

“Thanks,” Steve repeated. He hated this – that his loneliness was so apparent to everyone. He hated anyone feeling like they had to take care of him. That was his job, had been his job for years now. It was the only thing he was good at that actually mattered. It bothered him that everyone seemed to know that he couldn’t do the same for himself, even Eddie, who had only just begun to really know him. 

Eddie startled him by rapping his knuckles against his window. 

Steve cranked down the window, looking up expectantly. 

“Almost forgot,” Eddie said, holding out a cassette. “This is for you.” 

“Furthering my musical education, Munson?” Steve asked.

“Something like that,” Eddie smirked. 

“Thank you,” Steve said. 

“Eh, it’s nothing.”

“See you soon?” Steve said, looking up at Eddie through the window.

“Yeah, in your dreams tonight,” Eddie said with a wink, patting the roof of Steve’s car before retreating.  

Steve waved him off, looking down at the cassette in his hands. The outside of the j-card was plain enough, just his name – well, “Stevie” – printed by hand in neat capital letters. He opened the case and pulled out the cassette. There was writing on the inside of the j-card and a small piece of paper folded up, too. He pulled out the paper. 

Don’t worry. It’s not all metal. There’s actually no metal at all. Almost. I know you think that’s all I listen to, but as a musician, I make it my business to know a little bit of everything. These are just songs I thought you might actually like. - Eddie

He furrowed his brow, looking at the note, then at the trailer Eddie had just disappeared into. 

“You’re a weird dude, Munson,” he muttered to himself as he started the car, popping the cassette Eddie had made into the tape slot. The first song filtered through the speakers. 

This is not the first time you’ve tried to get away, this is not a party, where people know your name. 

He checked the card. “Stay” by Oingo Boingo. He thought he remembered Jonathan mentioning that name, saying something about the band being big in California, but he couldn’t say he had ever heard them before. 

Go, don’t you go, won’t you stay with me one more day?

The song made his stomach feel a little funny. He tried not to think about how each of the few times he’d driven Eddie home, the other boy had asked him to come in and stay awhile and he’d always said yes. Of course, the first time he said no, Eddie sent him home with a song pleading for him to do the opposite. Surely, he was reading too much into that. 

The next song that came on was a little less his speed – it sounded like The Pretenders, who had never really been his jam – but Eddie must have picked it for a reason. 

He tapped the steering wheel along to the drum beat, trying to parse the lyrics for something, anything at all. Maybe Eddie thought those would speak to him if the musical style didn’t particularly suit his tastes. The lyrics were a little hard to understand with the way the lead singer was saying them. He plucked up the jewel case to read the j-card. “Tattooed Love Boys”. 

“Huh,” he said to the empty car. Pale skin littered with bats and spiders and angry red scars flashed into his mind, but he shook the image away. 

He pulled into the driveway, ejecting the tape when he parked. His footsteps echoed through the house as he entered the silent hallway. He made a beeline for the stereo in the den, trying to minimize the time he was entombed in the quiet. The tape picked up halfway through the Pretenders song, and Steve mentally thanked Eddie for unknowingly giving him a reprieve from the oppressive silence of his home. Eddie was very good at that, really – providing him a reprieve. It was as if somehow, he knew that having something new, something unfamiliar, was so much better than the mindless drone of the television or the two or three records Steve had been wearing groves into for the last year because he’d been to busy taking care of his gaggle of teenagers and killing creatures to worry about expanding his collection. Steve took the j-card from the jewel case and tucked it in his back pocket.

The next song that came on was definitely The Cure, which made Steve do a double take. He didn’t even know how Eddie found these songs. The Cure was so off-base for him. 

Steve shook his head as he climbed the stairs to his room, picking up his laundry basket and hauling it downstairs to the laundry room. 

Everything you do is irresistible, everything you do is so kissable, why can’t I be you?

He couldn’t imagine Eddie making this tape. There didn’t seem to be any rhyme or reason to the songs that Eddie had chosen. Perhaps he really just thought that Steve needed to get out of his top forty bubble because none of it was anything Steve would have listened to of his own volition. 

As he separated his laundry into piles, the song switched to something a little more to his taste – which was to say something that was played on the radio a million times a day. He bopped along to “Love My Way” as he finished sorting and started his first load of laundry, almost forgetting that he was listening to the tape Eddie had made him instead of one of his own. 

That was until deafening electric guitar ripped through the air. He closed the door on the washer and hurried to the den to turn down the volume. He didn’t want the neighbors calling in a noise complaint. The last thing he needed was Hop or one of his guys showing up to ream him. After the volume was adjusted, he checked the notes Eddie had written on the j-card. It was “We Could Be Together” by LOUDNESS, which Eddie had written in all caps. 

“Loudness is right,” he said aloud. 

The song wasn’t all that bad, if not a bit aggressive. The listing for the last song on the tape – which was quite apparently one-sided – caught Steve’s eye and threw him for a loop. “Happy Together” by The Turtles. Everyone knew that song. It was one of the first songs he remembered hearing on the radio as a little boy. Definitely not for his musical education, unless Eddie really thought his musical knowledge was so lacking.

Imagine me and you. I do. I think about you day and night, it’s only right.

Steve was hit by a wave of nausea. He pressed the pause button on the stereo, his hand shaking. He felt hot and cold all over and he couldn’t get a good breath in. He wondered, briefly, if he was getting sick. He abandoned his laundry in favor of laying down on the couch to rest. 

Steve was still confused about the stupid tape when he went up to his room that night after the NBC Monday Night Movie came to an end. It was fine. Eddie was weird. ( Imagine me and you. I do. ) One couldn’t read too much into his motives; it was most likely he was just being Eddie. 

He remembered the card in his back pocket. He pulled it out and turned it over in his hands. He ran a finger over the letters that made up his name. Eddie had been so careful when he had written them. Upon closer examination, he could see that Eddie had written it in pencil first and then gone over it again with a permanent marker. Even the tracklist on the back was written in neater penmanship than Eddie normally boasted. He imagined Eddie sitting at the table in his kitchenette, his tongue poking out between his lips in concentration as he printed out the block letters, all the time thinking of him. With that image in mind, the j-card felt like a rare treasure. There it was, in his hands, a physical artifact that showed, against all odds, Eddie “The Freak” Munson gave a shit about King Steve Harrington. Why, at that moment, did that feel like the happiest miracle of his life? 

His eyes darted to the corkboard above his bed. It had been a gift from Robin, who thought his bedroom was a little sterile. When he had asked what he should put on it, she had said “Express yourself a little. It won’t kill you, dingus.” So, naturally, the first thing he’d pinned up was a polaroid of Robin in her Scoops uniform, flipping the camera the bird. It was one of the outtakes from when he had had to take her picture to put up in the breakroom for employee of the month. They hadn’t really been more than acquaintances then, but he hadn’t ever thrown it away. It was like the universe was telling him he’d want it one day. There was a picture of him and Dustin sitting on the couch in the Wheeler’s basement, both of them crossing their eyes and sticking out their tongues. There was a paper “You Suck/You Rule” scoreboard that Robin had pinned up so she could keep a running score of every time he was annoying when she was over at his place. Miraculously, “You Rule” was currently winning out, if only by one tally. There was another polaroid of him, Nance, Jonathan, Robin, Eddie, and the kids that they had taken at the lake a few weeks ago, next to a handwritten schedule of all the days and times Dustin had Hellfire meetings and Robin had band practice and a print out of the hours he was working that week. There was a place about the size of a j-card in the lower left corner. He climbed onto his bed and pulled out one of the unused thumb tacks, pinning the card in that spot. With the card (and hopefully, his current inability to stop thinking about Eddie and his stupid tape) taken care of, he turned back to his bedroom. It could do with a quick cleaning.

He puttered around his room for a few minutes, rearranging things on his desk into a semblance of tidiness. 

He picked up one of the few books sitting on his desk. Dustin had given it to him, begging him to read it so he would “get” why the kids loved D&D so much, and paused. Dragons of Autumn Twilight didn’t really sound like something that would be his bag, but it wasn’t like he had anything better to do. He riffled through the pages, noting there was something written on the title page. He stilled. In the upper right-hand corner, printed in ballpoint pen, was “Property of E. Munson.” 

“No shit,” Steve muttered to himself, setting the book back on his desk. There was no escaping Eddie tonight.

He wasn’t particularly tired, but he crawled into bed anyway, pulling the blankets up around him. Somewhere, in between listening to the house settle and staring at the j-card on the cork board, he fell asleep. 

Chapter Text

It was warm when Steve woke up the next afternoon. It was his day off, Robin had some sort of field trip for the senior band members, and Dustin was riding his bike home from school so he had nowhere to be. He finished the laundry he had started the night before and ate breakfast. By the time all his clothes were put away, he felt the day stretching out before him purposelessly. 

The truth was, as much as he complained, he didn’t mind the kids asking him to drive them places and do things with them. It was funny how driving them to the next town over to see a movie or to the lake made him feel like he mattered, like he still existed. 

It wasn’t that he was one of those guys that had peaked in high school. It was more like he had had the harsh realities of the world exposed to him at an early age and it was hard to just go to college when that hardly seemed to matter anymore. Besides, his grades had taken a dive with the whole Mind Flayer thing. 

He wouldn’t stay in Hawkins forever. Hell, he might even go to junior college and try to get into a four-year someday,  but he couldn’t even think about that until he knew all this Upside Down shit was resolved once and for good. It was looking more and more like that was the case every day, but he knew he wouldn’t be able to rest easy until the kids were out. He wouldn’t be able to handle the guilt if anything happened to them because he left for something as inconsequential as a college degree. 

He had read a line of Shakespeare in his senior year English class that came back to him over and over again when he thought about going out into the world, away from the people who knew and understood what he had gone through in the Upside Down, to join the ignorant masses. “There are more things in heaven and earth than are dreamt of in your philosophy”. His teacher had said that, back in Elizabethan times, philosophy meant science, but Steve liked to think it meant life philosophy. How could he ever move away, go to school, meet someone, when they didn’t know ? How do you explain your nightmares to someone who has never seen a person liquified or bitten off a bat’s head? 

He knew he couldn’t sit around and stew about it all day. He had done that enough after Starcourt when they had believed Hopper was dead and the Byerses had left, wounding the Party so deeply, he wasn’t sure it would ever heal. Not that any one of them blamed the Byerses for leaving, but it still hurt to see them go. Regardless, he knew now that ruminating on it all was not the best option available to him. 

He knew that talking about it would probably be the smartest route, but Steve wasn’t quite ready for that. That left one option. Swimming until his hands and feet were so pruned they hurt. Even that came with its difficulties (Barb had died in that pool) but it was better than nothing. 

He slipped into his bathing suit around two, grabbing a pool towel and the cordless phone and putting them on one of the deck chairs. He waded into the shallow end and began swimming laps. He had just hit his thirty-third lap when he became aware of the phone ringing. 

He swam to the edge and pulled himself out, shaking out his hair and drying his hands before he answered. 

“Harrington residence.” 

“What are you wearing?”

“Hey Eds,” Steve said, a smile ghosting across his lips. 

“Well?” Eddie asked.

“What?” 

“I asked you a question. I would so desperately like an answer.” 

“Swim trunks, weirdo,” Steve answered with a nervous laugh. 

“Oh, tell me more,” Eddie said, pitching his voice deeper in what Steve assumed was an effort to sound sexy. 

“What more is there to tell?”

“Are you all wet? Is there water running in rivulets down your chiseled-”

“Eddie!” he exclaimed, rubbing a hand against his cheek as if that could erase the heat spreading there.

“You’re no fun,” Eddie huffed, returning to his normal manner of speaking. 

“What’s up? Besides you being a perv, that is?” 

“Just wanted to see what you were doing.”

“Well, now you know.”

“The AC went out in my trailer.”

“Bummer, man.”

“It’s hot,” Eddie continued.

“I’ll bet.”

“So very, very hot,” Eddie continued breathily, putting on the pseudo sexy voice again. “If only someone could help me out.”

“If you’re asking to come over and swim, Eddie, be my guest,” Steve laughed.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” Eddie said quickly.

“Just come around back when you get here,” Steve said.

“See you in fifteen,” Eddie replied and hung up. 

He stared at the phone for a moment, smiling to himself. Eddie had a way of making him feel better without even trying. Steve often thought that, if Eddie had been around after Starcourt, he would have fared a bit better. Sure, he had Robin and Dustin and everyone else, but there was something about Eddie. Eddie made Steve feel like maybe the weight of the world wasn’t on his shoulders, or if it was, it wasn’t really all that heavy after all. 

He toweled off and went inside to gather up a few things before Eddie got there. He grabbed another towel, sunscreen, and a bag of pretzels since Eddie seemed to be a fiend for them. He wandered around, looking for his boombox. When he found it, he pressed the eject button to see what tape he had left in it. It was empty. 

Imagine me and you. I do.

For the first time since he woke up, Steve’s mind returned to the mixtape Eddie had given him the night before. His stomach did an odd little flip. He hoped Eddie wouldn’t ask him about it, because he wasn’t quite sure what he could say. That it was the strangest amalgamation of songs he had ever listened to in one go? That he liked it (he had ) but it confused him more than anything? Steve knew Eddie wouldn’t take either of those responses well. 

For all of his bravado, Eddie was sensitive. He had a big heart, and it got bruised easily. Steve felt his own heart crack in two every time he saw the other boy’s face fall, regardless of the reason. Once, Eddie had spilled his Slurpee on the ground while they were at the lake and Steve found it so difficult to bear the other boy’s disappointment that he insisted they share his. Eddie had refused initially, but once Steve had wrestled him to the ground and force-fed him Slurpee with that little spoon at the end of the straw, his devil-may-care smile had returned and all was right with the world. 

The mixtape felt like a bigger deal than the Slurpee. If he said the wrong thing, the look on Eddie’s face might kill him. Perhaps having it playing when he got there would be enough. 

His hands were already full, so he carried his stuff outside and then returned inside for the tape. He rewound it before he took it out of the stereo. He was halfway through “Stay” by the time Eddie waltzed into the backyard. 

“Hey,” Eddie said, holding up a six-pack of beer. “I come bearing gifts.” 

“Thanks, man,” Steve said, crossing his arms across his chest. They had been swimming together several times over the last couple months, but it was always weird seeing Eddie’s bare legs in swim trunks. Eddie in anything other than jeans always made Steve feel more naked just by being near him. 

“You’re a real lifesaver. My trailer is a pressure cooker right now. I don’t think I would have made it through the day.” 

Eddie set the beers down on the deck chair nearest to Steve, setting his cigarettes on top of the box.

“Glad I could help,” Steve said, his mouth going dry as Eddie pulled off his shirt. Steve pulled one of the beers from the six pack and cracked it open, taking a long swig. It didn’t seem to help. Weird, he thought to himself. Maybe he was coming down with something. 

The song faded out and the next one began. 

“Tattooed Love Boys,” Eddie said, reaching for the bottle of sunscreen Steve had brought out and squeezing a large dollop into his hand. He began dabbing it on his chest, rubbing his hand over the tattoo there. He winked. “Good choice, Harrington.”  

“Jesus,” Steve murmured to himself, clearing his throat before taking another gulp of beer. He must be coming down with a cold. Or the flu. Maybe the bubonic plague. You never knew when that would come back around.

“You alright, Steve? You look a little peaky,” Eddie said, his brow furrowed in concern but Steve could have sworn there was a smile playing at his lips. 

“I feel a little feverish all of the sudden.”

Eddie stepped forward, pressing a sunscreen-slimy hand to Steve’s forehead, then to both his cheeks. 

“You feel fine to me,” Eddie said, wiping the remaining sunscreen residue on his hand off on Steve’s shoulder. Eddie motioned at Steve’s face. “You might want to rub that in.”

“Asshole,” Steve said, massaging the sunscreen into his face. 

“Forgive me for caring about your skin,” Eddie said. “You may have a base tan, but you can still burn. Get my back.”

Steve set down his beer and squirted some sunscreen into his palms as Eddie turned his back to him. He twisted his hair and held it up like Steve had seen the girls at the lake do when they did each other’s sunscreen. 

Eddie has nice hair , a little voice in the back of Steve’s head whispered. And shoulder blades. Shoulder blades? Since when do you look at those, Stev-

“I’m not getting any younger, Harrington,” Eddie said, glancing back over his shoulder. 

“Sorry,” Steve mumbled. 

He made quick work of putting the sunscreen on Eddie’s back, crossing his arms across his chest again as soon as he finished. 

“Should probably wait a couple minutes for that to set in before you get in,” Steve said.

“Okay, Dad,” Eddie laughed, breaking open the bag of pretzels. “Wait, do I have to add a minute to that time for every one of these I eat?” 

“No, I’m pretty sure the swimming after eating thing is a myth.”

Steve watched with rapt attention as a pretzel disappeared between Eddie’s lips. He cleared his throat again. 

“Good to know,” Eddie said. 

Steve lunged for Eddie’s cigarettes, ripping the flap as he pulled one out . 

“Woah, woah, woah, whatcha doing there?” Eddie said. 

“I need a cigarette,” Steve said as Eddie snatched the pack away from him. 

“All you had to do is ask nicely,” Eddie said. 

Steve put the cigarette between his lips before realizing he didn’t have a lighter.

“Hey stud, need a light?” Eddie asked, stepping closer, his face once inches from Steve’s. He held his lighter up to the tip of Steve’s cigarette. Steve breathed in, focusing on the burgeoning ember of his cigarette until he realized that probably made him look cross-eyed. His eyes met Eddie’s. 

“That’s better,” Eddie said quietly, and Steve wasn’t sure if he was talking about the eye contact or the cigarette. Eddie stepped away as quickly as he had appeared and Steve reasoned it was definitely in reference to the cigarette. 

“I can’t believe you have this whole place to yourself, Harrington,” Eddie said, diving back into the bag of pretzels. “This is, like, the dream.”

“Like I said, it’s not so bad,” Steve shrugged, ashing his cigarette onto the concrete. 

“Except when it is,” Eddie said, looking at Steve pensively. 

“Yeah, except when it is.”

“When’s it bad?” Eddie asked, popping another pretzel in his mouth.

Steve took a drag off his cigarette, letting out a puff of smoke with a shaky breath. He was acutely aware of Eddie’s eyes on his face, pinning him down with his unwavering attention. Once Eddie got a bee in his bonnet, he wouldn’t let up until it was out. This week, it seemed that bee had something to do with Steve and his big, empty house. If Steve didn’t squash it now, Eddie would bring it up every chance he got. 

“When I go to bed,” Steve said, finally. “When I turn off the TV and the lights and go up to bed, and all I can hear is the house settling and the clock ticking at the end of the hall. During the summer, I can usually hear kids yelling down the street and it makes me think about Dustin. About all of them, really. They were so little, you know, when it first happened. I mean, I always think I was too young to go through what I went through, but Dustin? He was, what? Eleven? Twelve? He was just a little kid. He’s still just a kid. And he’s been through –”

Steve’s voice broke and he shook his head.

“A war,” Eddie supplied for him. 

“Yeah,” Steve managed to eke out around the lump in his throat. 

“You really love him, huh?” 

“Who couldn’t?” Steve said. “He’s the best.”

“If this fucking MK Ultra, interdimensional shit had never happened, you would have never known him like you do,” Eddie said.

“I would sacrifice that if it meant he could have had a normal childhood.”

“ He would have never had you ,” Eddie continued. “And he needs you. He needs a male role model.”

“I guess,” Steve said. He didn’t say that he thought there were people better suited to be Dustin’s role model.

“Always look on the bright side of life,” Eddie sang in a tune Steve didn’t recognize.

Steve smiled. 

“What’s that?” 

“Steve,” Eddie chastised. “ Life of Brian ?”

“What’s that?” Steve repeated. 

“Monty Python?” 

“Haven’t seen it,” Steve said.

“Steve, you work at the video store,” Eddie groaned.

“I don’t watch everything that comes through our doors,” Steve said.

“You are so –”, Eddie shook his head.

“Uneducated?” 

“Yeah, man,” Eddie said. “You think we’re good to go in?” 

“Should be,” Steve said, tapping the ash off his cigarette.

Eddie took advantage of his distraction, running toward Steve. His shoulder collided with Steve’s stomach as he wrapped his arms around Steve’s waist, toppling him backward into the pool, water splashing up around them. 

Steve came up sputtering for air, tossing his now-soaked cigarette out of the pool. He pushed his hair out of his face as he caught his breath.

He heard Eddie resurface behind him, already laughing. 

“You are so dead, Munson,” Steve said, lunging for the other boy and dunking him under again.

He followed Eddie under in the tussle, his hands gliding over the sunscreen-soft skin of the other boy’s arms as they struggled against each other. Eddie somehow gained the upper hand, pulling Steve back to the surface by the arm and promptly getting him into a headlock when they were both above water. 

“The hair, watch the hair,” Steve laughed as Eddie gave him a noogie.

“Oh, not the hair,” Eddie mocked. “Anything but The Hair .” 

Steve dug his fingers into Eddie’s side, tickling him mercilessly. 

“You fight dirty, Harrington,” Eddie said through his laughter, releasing Steve and pushing him away. He paddled away from Steve, clutching his sides once he was a safe distance away. 

“I fight to win, Eddie,” Steve replied, smoothing back his hair.

They both tensed, waiting for the other to attack.

“Truce?” Eddie asked. 

“I don’t trust you,” Steve said.

“Oh, you wound me,” Eddie said, clutching his chest. Then he paused, his face taking on a seriousness Steve had only seen once, in the Upside Down before the battle with Vecna. “I trust you with my life, Stevie.” 

Steve felt that tightness in his chest, the one that only dissipated when Eddie was smiling the way he was supposed to be.

“Well, of course, I trust you with mine, too, Eds. I just don’t trust you not to tickle me right now.”

“You started that,” Eddie said, that blinding smile returning to his face as he pointed at Steve in accusation.

“ You pushed me in!”

“You looked so very pushable,” Eddie whined.

“What does that even mean?!” 

“It means you were standing by the edge of the pool in the presence of one Eddie Munson.”
“And that’s a no-no?” Steve asked.

“Big no-no,” Eddie agreed. 

“Noted.”

“Alright, truce. Cross my heart,” Eddie said, stepping towards Steve with his right hand extended.

“You swear?”

“On my guitar.”

“Okay,” Steve said, extending his own hand to shake Eddie’s. 

Eddie held fast to his hand when he tried to pull away.

“What do you swear on?”

“I don’t know, my hair?” Steve said, trying to think of something as important as Eddie’s guitar was to him.

“Nope, that’s already wrecked,” Eddie said, shaking his head.

“I swear on… Dustin?” 

“Yeah, that’ll do,” Eddie said, giving Steve’s hand another shake before he released him. “You better not try anything or I’ll tell Henderson you don’t give a flying fuck about him.”

“Lucky for you, I’m a man of my word,” Steve replied, swimming to the edge of the pool to grab his beer. 

“Grab me one,” Eddie called.

Steve pulled himself halfway out of the pool and inched an unopened can out of the pack with his fingertips. It fell onto the concrete and rolled towards the edge of the pool and dropped into the water. Steve retrieved it and brought it to Eddie.

Eddie cracked it open and took a sip. 

“Mmm. Chlorine-y” Eddie said, trying to wipe the pool water from the top of the can with his equally chlorine-y fingers. 

Steve laughed. 

Eddie splashed him.

“Hey, hey, hey, you swore,” Steve said, holding up his free hand to shield himself and crouching down so the water level reached his shoulders.
“God dammit, I did,” Eddie said. 

When Steve put down his hand, he found Eddie had come closer to him again. He was looking down at Steve with a smile that was different than the one he usually wore. It was quieter, somehow. 

For a moment, the only sound was “Love My Way” filtering from the boombox speakers.

Now that he was eye-level with Eddie’s torso, he noticed it was marred with angry red fingermarks mixed in with his demobat scars and tattoos. 

“I think I tickled you hard enough to bruise,” Steve said, running his index finger along one of the marks. His fingers left a wake of goosebumps on Eddie’s skin.

“Here’s hoping,” Eddie said with a wink.

“You’re twisted.”

“Would you have me any other way?”

Steve let his gaze drift up to Eddie’s face and he felt an alarming surge of fondness ripple through him. No, I don’t think I would.

“Feel better?” Eddie asked, his voice low, originating somewhere in his chest. 

Steve swallowed. Now that he thought about it, he was feeling feverish again. But his heart felt lighter than it had in weeks. 

“Yeah,” Steve said, his voice coming out in an unintended whisper. 

“What can I say?” Eddie said, leaning down. “Munson is the best medicine.”

Steve wrinkled his nose at that.

“Too cheesy?” Eddie asked.

“Big time,” Steve agreed. 

They stood like that for what felt like forever, looking at each other. He has pretty eyes , the voice in Steve’s head pointed out. And he did. Steve didn’t know how he hadn’t noticed before. He’d heard people called doe-eyed before, but he had never really known what they meant. Looking up at Eddie, now, Steve thought that perhaps the phrase had been invented for him. His eyes dipped to Eddie’s lips. Strangely, he had noticed those before, in the Upside Down. But he hadn’t thought about it too much. The imminent death thing was a bit distracting. There was nothing to distract him now. His palms prickled with sweat, which was impressive given his hands were underwater. Something was seriously wrong with him.

Eddie opened his mouth to say something just as the cordless phone began to ring. 

“Should probably get that,” Steve said, his eyes still zeroed in on Eddie’s lips.

“Probably,” Eddie said, his voice breathy. 

Steve tore his eyes away from Eddie and waded over to the side of the pool, abandoning his beer on the edge before pulling himself out. 

“Harrington residence.”

“My front tire popped.”

Didn’t anyone say hello anymore?

“Again?” Steve groaned, dragging a hand across his face. 

“Again,” Dustin confirmed. 

“Do you have that tire repair kit I got you?”

“No,” Dustin said.

“Dus tin . I’m kinda busy. Can Mrs. Wheeler drive you?” 

“Mr. Wheeler is in a mood, so he said she couldn’t,” Dustin said. 

Steve groaned again.

“Okay. We just need to get dressed and we’ll be over in a bit,” Steve said. He looked at Eddie in the pool and mouthed “sorry”.

“Dustin?” Eddie asked.

Steve nodded.

“Get dressed?” Dustin said, his voice dripping with innuendo. Steve could hear the stupid look on his face.

“Yes, Dustin, Eddie and I are swimming ,” Steve said.

“I wanna go swimming!”

“You can come swimming next weekend,” Steve said, rolling his eyes.

“Can Eddie come?”

Steve jumped as the man in question appeared behind him, draping a towel over Steve’s shoulders.

“Dustin wants to know if you want to come swimming next weekend,” he said, covering the receiver and looking at Eddie over his shoulder.

“Indubitably,” Eddie replied.

“What?”

“That’s a yes, Harrington. How you graduated before me is a mystery.” 

“He says he’ll come,” Steve reported to Dustin.

“And Will and Mike and Lucas?”

“What is this, a Hellfire meeting?”

“No, because you’re going to be there. It’s a boys' day,” Dustin said.

“Boys' day. Okay,” Steve sighed.

“Cool,” Dustin said. “See you soon.”

Steve hit the call end button.

“He fucked up his bike again,” Steve sighed. “It’s gonna scratch the shit out of the top of my car.”

“We can take the van,” Eddie said, dragging Steve into the house.

Steve ran upstairs to get dressed, leaving Eddie to do the same in the guest bathroom.

“Steve?” Eddie called from downstairs. “Slight problem.”

“What?” he called back. 

“I only brought my trunks and I don’t really wanna get my car seat all wet.”

“Oh,” Steve yelled. “One sec.”

He rummaged through his pants drawer and found a pair of jeans that were slightly too tight on him. They were a lighter wash than he had ever seen Eddie wear, but they would have to do. 

“Here,” he said, throwing them down from the top landing.

“Thanks.” 

He finished dressing back downstairs, finding Eddie waiting for him in the foyer. 

He stopped in his tracks. 

“Ready?” Eddie asked.

Eddie looked good in his jeans. Really, really good. Why didn’t those jeans look that good when Steve wore them? Besides the fact that they were a little too small. 

“Steve?” 

“I- um.”

He coughed. 

“Sorry, I have, like, pool water in my lungs or a cold or, like, pneumonia or something, I think,” he managed to croak.

“Or something,” Eddie agreed with a smile. “Let’s go.”

Chapter Text

Eddie hadn’t told him about the show – he never did, until after the fact, so Steve had never had a chance to see him play. Steve would be lying if he said it didn't bother him. He wondered if he had teased Eddie too much for his taste in music. He couldn’t think of another reason that Eddie would ask Robin to come see him play and not him. Maybe he hadn’t known he was playing until after they had had to go rescue Dustin from the Wheelers’. 

“Are you sure it’s okay if I come?” Steve asked, poking his head out of his bathroom door. 

“Steve, you’re his friend. Of course, it’s fine if you come. He probably just forgot to tell you,” Robin said, rummaging through one of the desk drawers. 

“He was just here to swim a couple days ago,” Steve said, dipping back into the bathroom. He leaned closer to the mirror, making minuscule adjustments to his hair. “And he didn’t ask me then. When did he ask you?” 

“Um. Last week,” Robin said. 

“See!” Steve said, giving up on his hair. “He didn’t forget, I’m just not invited.”

Robin was kneeling on his bed when he walked back in, adding another tally to the “You Suck” column on his corkboard.

“What is that for?” Steve groaned. “I don’t need that today. First, Eddie doesn’t want me at his show, and now I suck?”

“You’ll notice that you equally suck and rule,” Robin said, tapping the paper. “Seven to seven. And that’s exactly why you suck. Do you think Eddie just hangs around with anyone? You. Are. His. Friend. He won’t mind if you come.” 

“Maybe he’s just using me for my pool,” Steve said, sinking into his desk chair. He leaned back, letting his head loll over the backrest. “You know, cuz what else could he get from me that he couldn’t get from someone cooler? Someone that listens to metal music and gets all his references. All I’ve got is a pool.”

“What’s this?” Robin said, pointedly ignoring Steve’s completely valid theory. 

“What’s what?” Steve asked, not bothering to look.

“The “Stevie” on the board.”

“Oh. That. It’s from a mixtape Eddie made me. The tracklist is on the back,” Steve said.

“That was for you ?” Robin asked. 

“You knew about it?” Steve asked, swiveling the desk chair so an upside down Robin came into view.

“I knew he was making one. He was asking around for a tape deck,” Robin said. “I didn't know it was for you . He was fixated on it for like two weeks.”

“Two weeks? It only had like six songs,” Steve said.

“I feel like I need to add another column right now. A “You’re Stupid” column. The man spent two weeks agonizing over a mixtape for you –” 

Steve opened his mouth to interrupt but Robin held out her hand.

“I don’t care how many songs it was! He agonized over it. And you think he would be mad at you if you came to see him play? It’s the least you could do, dingus,” Robin said.

“I don’t know,” Steve said.

“Are you looking for a reason not to go?” Robin asked.

“What? No. I just don’t want to intrude.”

“Steve, this isn’t like a Hellfire meeting or a party or something. There are going to be strangers at this gig. People Eddie has never seen in his life and will never see again. He’ll be glad to see one more familiar face in the crowd,” Robin said.

“He invited Nancy, Robin. He invited Nancy and not me. He doesn’t see Nancy half as much as he sees me,” Steve argued.

“Steve, I’m ninety percent sure he only invited Nancy so I wouldn’t be alone in the crowd,” Robin said. 

“You know who else he could have invited to make sure you weren’t alone? ME!” 

There was another reason he was worried Eddie didn’t want him there, but he couldn’t bring himself to tell Robin. He wasn’t sure why he couldn’t tell Robin, but he couldn’t. He hadn’t heard from Eddie much since the day in the pool, and he wondered if he had done something to upset him. He had seemed normal when he had dropped Steve back off at his house and collected his remaining beers, but it was entirely possible something could have changed since then. Maybe Steve really had bruised him when he tickled him, and Eddie was pissed. But he didn’t seem too bothered by the idea of that when Steve had brought it up. Maybe he was mad that Steve hadn’t thanked him again for the mixtape, or told him what he thought. Or maybe he thought Steve was too much of a downer, even though Eddie had been the one to weddle all of that out of him.

“Steve. Corroded Coffin is like one of four bands playing tonight. We’ll watch Eddie play for like twenty minutes and then we can split. Can you please, for once in your life, act normal and come to this show with me?” Robin sighed.

“I was normal before I met you,” Steve mumbled, sitting up.

“No, you were a Stepford Wife before you met me.”
“Stepford Wife?”

“Oh my GOD, watch a movie,” Robin said. 

“Fine. I’ll go,” Steve said, standing up. “I’ll go. After I change my shirt.”

“Your shirt is fine,” Robin said.

“No, it’s too – ugh!

“Okay, sure, it’s too ugh. Why do you care? Because Nancy is going to be there?” Robin asked. 

“What? No, I don’t care what she thinks about my shirt, I care what –” Steve cut himself off. I care what Eddie thinks . 

It only made sense that he did. He didn’t want to show up at the show and embarrass Eddie by being his yuppy friend in the audience, trying but failing to nod along on beat like some dork. Not that Eddie ever seemed to care about being seen with Steve anywhere else they went. But this was different. Eddie and his band had an image to uphold. He couldn’t be seen with someone in a sweater.
“You care what…” Robin prompted, looking at Steve where he stood frozen in the middle of his room.

“I just don’t want to stick out like a sore thumb,” Steve said. 

“It’s fine, Steve, we’ll stick out together. Last time I checked, I don’t look like someone who knows much about metal and neither does Nancy,” Robin reassured him.

“Yeah, but you don’t have to because you’re already cool,” Steve said.

“I’m sorry, I’m what? Can I get that in writing, Harrington?” she said, holding out the pen she’d used to mark the scoreboard.

Steve huffed, snatching the pen from her. He took her hand and wrote “you’re cool” across the back of it. 

“Steve!”

“You asked for it.” 

“I meant, like, on a certificate.”

“That’s your certificate. Let’s just go before I change my mind,” Steve said, picking up his bomber jacket and heading for the hall. 

****

The bar Eddie was playing in was more crowded than Steve expected. People were milling about, drinking and waiting for the band to start up. Corroded Coffin was already on stage getting ready to start their set when they arrived. Steve supposed he should thank God for small favors, because that meant Eddie wouldn’t notice he was there until afterwards and his almost definitely unwanted presence wouldn’t throw Eddie off his groove. 

Steve dragged Robin towards the back wall as Eddie slung his guitar over his shoulder. Eddie walked up to the mic, leaning into it so close his lips were nearly touching the mesh. 

“We thought we’d start with something a little mellow tonight, didn’t we boys?” Eddie said, turning to look at the bassist with a smile. 

He then proceeded to tear into his guitar with one of the least mellow licks of music Steve had ever heard. He was good at playing guitar, that was never a question. Steve figured he had to be, if Dustin wasn’t lying about how sick his little concert in the Upside Down was. But Steve’s jaw nearly hit the floor when Eddie began singing. 

“See that cat? Yeah, I do mean you,” Eddie belted, his voice rough in all the right ways. The song was definitely more traditional rock and roll than Steve had expected – more hardcore than what he’d listen to personally, but not metal. Maybe that’s what Eddie had meant by mellow. 

“He’s good. Like really good,” Steve said, leaning down to speak into Robin’s ear. 

“Are you surprised?” Robin shouted back to him.

Steve hadn’t had time to answer because Eddie had broken out into a guitar solo. He had never really understood why girls at Beatles concerts wayback when would go absolutely ballistic the second those guys picked up their instruments, but he was beginning to understand. Eddie looked so very cool up there and something about the way he moved while he played made Steve’s legs feel like they were made of jelly. He felt like maybe he needed to leave, step out and get some air. Like maybe it was weird to get jellylegs because one of your best friends was playing guitar. 

“Right on,” Eddie screamed into the mic. “Right on.” 

“I need water,” Steve shouted to Robin. “You?” 

She shook her head in the negative, moving along to the music as best she could. 

Steve began wading through the crowd towards the bar. Despite being at a little over half capacity, the area in front of the stage was rowdy. Steve was jostled thoroughly as struggled through it.

“Watch it,” a burly man in a leather jacket growled at him when Steve was pushed into him by another patron. 

“Sorry, man,” Steve said, holding up his hands. “Didn’t mean to.”

He decided to just stay put and move as little as possible when a short girl in a Mötorhead t-shirt nearly barrelled him over. He looked back towards where he had left Robin. Nancy had arrived since he ventured into the crowd. She was standing next to Robin looking thoroughly terrified. He caught her eye, giving her a little wave. She waved back. He jerked his chin towards Robin. Nancy nodded and tugged Robin’s sleeve. 

“What?” Robin mouthed at him once Nancy had pointed him out. 

“I’m stuck,” he mouthed, grimacing.

She twisted up her mouth and shrugged as if to say “I don’t know what to tell you”. 

The music faded out momentarily before Eddie dove into another riff without introducing the song. This one was familiar to him. Hell, it had saved his life. 

He hadn’t been there when Eddie had played it in the Upside Down, but he had listened to the song out of curiosity when they had gotten back. He’d almost asked Eddie to play it for him on countless occasions, but he didn’t know if it would retraumatize the poor guy. Apparently not though, because he was killing it on stage now. 

Steve shot a glance back to Robin and Nance, raising his eyebrows. “Holy shit,” he mouthed.

“Yeah,” Robin mouthed back.

He turned back to the stage, utterly transfixed by Eddie. He hadn’t realized how close he had gotten to the stage until “Master of Puppets” came to an end and Eddie scanned the roiling crowd, smiling triumphantly. His eyes landed on Steve’s face. Eddie’s eyes grew wide. 

“Hi Eds,” Steve whispered, hoping to god Eddie could read his lips from where he stood. 

Eddie brushed his hair away from his face, looking a bit like a deer in the headlights. Shit. Steve knew he didn’t want him here. 

Eddie’s gaze remained upon him as crossed the stage to his bassist, saying something into his ear. The bassist nodded and started making rounds to the other band members, whispering something to each of them. 

Holy shit, are they going to have me removed? Steve thought to himself.

Eddie walked back to the microphone.

“We’re switching up the setlist because it’s come to my attention that a very special guest is in the audience tonight,” Eddie said, glancing at Steve again. “And it’s a miracle this person is here because they don’t listen to metal.”

Steve ducked his head to hide the fact that his cheeks were on fire. For a very brief moment, he thought he would have rather Eddie kicked him out. That didn’t last very long though, because Eddie kept talking. 

“But you know this song if you’ve done your homework, and I think you have. So this one’s for you,” Eddie said, turning to his bandmates. “One, two…”

It took Steve a few seconds to recognize the guitar riff; he had only listened to the tape  five or six times – always skipping the last song – but he knew this one. It was the LOUDNESS song, “We Could Be Together”. 

Steve was pretty sure his heartbeat had synched up with the drumbeat, the way it was thundering in his chest. He wanted to turn to Robin and Nancy, to give them a look of bewilderment, but he couldn't take his eyes off Eddie. That feeling he had had in the pool a few days before, the one that made him feel all melty, that made him think about Eddie’s hair and eyes in ways he would rather not analyze too closely, returned with alarming intensity. He felt someone grab his wrist, relieved when he turned to find Robin at his side. She stood on her tiptoes, shouting directly into his ear. 

“Is he talking about you?” she asked. 

Steve nodded.

“That poor bastard,” Robin said.

“Huh?” Steve yelled, his eyes returning to the stage, to Eddie, as if pulled by magnets. 

When Robin didn’t respond, he turned back to her, finding that she was watching him intently.

“Wait a minute,” she said as her eyes wandered over his face.

“What?”

“ You poor bastard,” Robin said.

“Robin, you’re not making any sense,” Steve yelled into her ear.

She shook her head.

“Doesn’t matter,” she yelled back. 

“Then be quiet and listen,” Steve said, pointing towards the stage. 

“Oh, I’m listening. Are you ?” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Steve asked. 

Robin laughed. 

“I’m going back to Nance.”

“Wait, what does that – whatever,” Steve said when she didn’t stop.

The band finished out the LOUDNESS song.

“Well, I think we have time for one more before they forcibly remove us. This is a Corroded Coffin original,” Eddie said with a smile.

When the set ended, Steve gave a couple of hollers in applause before pushing through the crowd to find the girls. 

“How’d you like it, Nancy?” he asked when he finally reached them.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to hear for the next week,” she laughed. “He’s good, though.”

“Yeah, he’s something else,” Steve agreed. 

“What was that song called, Steve?” Robin asked. 

“Which?” 

“I don’t know, dingus, maybe the one he sang after he got on stage and said this is for  Steve Harrington, whom I adore,” Robin said, rolling her eyes.

“He didn’t say that ,” Steve said.

“Mmm, he basically said that,” Nancy agreed. 

“What. Was. The. Song. Called?” Robin asked, punctuating each word with a slap to Steve’s arm. 

“It’s called “We Could Be Together”. Jesus, Rob,” Steve said, stilling her hand. “Which you coulda guessed since they say it like fifty times in the lyrics.”

“Oh, so you were listening to the lyrics,” Robin said. 

“She thought you might not be,” Nancy said.

“What why?”

“You don’t think they’re interesting?” Robin asked.

“I think they’re lyrics,” Steve replied.

“See?” Robin said, looking at Nancy. “Poor bastards.”

“Poor bastards,” Nancy agreed. 

“Will you — What is — quit saying that, will you?” Steve sputtered. Sometimes, when Nancy and Robin were together, he felt like he was trapped between two sphinxes speaking in riddles over his head. Tonight, he had had enough of it. “Where’s Eddie?”

“He said to wait outside for him after,” Robin said. 

“Fine by me,” Steve said. It was muggy in the bar. He was pretty sure his skin was covered in a layer of other people’s sweat, which made his stomach churn a little bit if he thought about it too much. 

He took Robin’s hand and motioned for her to take Nancy’s. He cleared a path in the crowd, dragging the girls through it. They all sighed a breath of relief when they made it outside. Steve could see some of Eddie’s band members packing gear into the back of a van (not Eddie’s – apparently vans were the vehicle of choice amongst the members of Corroded Coffin) across the parking lot. Eddie himself emerged from the back of the van a few minutes later. He waved when he spotted the three of them across the parking lot, jogging over to them.

Eddie pulled Robin into a hug as soon as he reached the group.

“Ew, gross, you’re all sweaty,” she said, pushing him away.

“That was really good, Eddie,” Nancy said as she accepted the hug he offered her.

“Aw, no need to lie, Nance.” 

“I’m not!”

“Sure,” Eddie laughed.

Eddie turned to Steve, and Steve swore there was a moment of hesitation before Eddie pulled him into a hug.

“Didn’t expect to see you here, man,” Eddie said as he pulled away.

“Well, I didn’t get an invite.”

Eddie pulled his hair across his face to hide his mouth.

“Musta forgot,” he mumbled.

“Must’ve,” Steve said.

“Man, I’m glad you all came,” Eddie said, turning back to the group in full. He was practically glowing with excitement. It was a good look for him, Steve decided.

Eddie pulled out his cigarettes, tapping one out and holding the pack out to Steve. 

“Steve doesn’t smoke anymore,” Robin said.

“But he-”

“ Doesn’t smoke anymore,” Steve interrupted quickly. 

“Oh, right. Sorry, I forgot. Duh,” Eddie said, eyeing Steve with amusement. Eddie lit a cigarette for himself, blowing smoke in Steve’s direction. 

Robin's eyes darted between Eddie and Steve, and Steve was sure he was caught. He didn’t smoke anymore. Mostly. Except sometimes. When Robin wasn’t there and Eddie was.

“Nancy, do you have your fake on you?” Robin asked, turning to the other girl. 

“Yeah, I used it to get in, remember? Why?” Nancy asked. 

“Wanna go get a drink?” Robin asked, pulling her back towards the door.

“You want to go back in there?” Nancy balked.

“Yeah, come on,” Robin said, giving Nancy’s arm another tug. Steve noticed her lean in to whisper something in Nancy’s ear. Apparently, it was something about him because Nancy glanced back at him. Robin was so going to chew him out about the smoking thing when they got in the car, he just knew it. 

“Wanna totally not take a drag off this?” Eddie asked, holding out his cigarette once the girls were back inside.

“Don’t you dare rat me out,” Steve said, accepting it.

“Hey. About not inviting you,” Eddie began, scratching the back of his neck.

“Hey, man, it slipped your mind. I get it.”

“Yeah, uh, it didn’t.”

“Oh,” Steve said tensely.

“I didn’t think you’d want to come,” Eddie said. “I didn’t want to put you in the position of having to say no.”

“I wouldn’t’ve said no,” Steve said, furrowing his brow.

“Well, I didn’t know that,” Eddie said. 

“I’m sorry if I dog on your music too much, Eds. I never was never making fun of your music. Like the music you make.”

“I know that. I just didn’t think you’d wanna come to something like this. You know, loud music, sweaty crowds, scary metalheads. And I would have…” Eddie faltered. “To be honest, I would have kinda been crushed if you had said no, man. Didn’t wanna risk it.”

Steve leaned back against the brick wall of the bar, letting the weight of Eddie’s honesty topple him. Why was it that, as of late, every word that left Eddie’s lips had come to mean so much to him? Things that would have registered as kind, maybe even sweet, any other day seemed to set him back on his heels. Why did the idea of Eddie being crushed at the mere idea of Steve refusing make his heart sing and sink all at once? Eddie wanted him there, and that made him feel - his brain stuttered. That made him feel good, because it would make anyone feel good; everyone wanted to feel wanted by the people they care about. But he felt something else, too, something bigger, something that told him that Eddie wanting him there affected him more than anyone else wanting him to be anywhere ever could. And maybe that was just because it had been so long since he had a solid friendship with another guy his age. Or what he thought was a solid friendship. Because that was the other thing, the thing that made his heart sink: how solid could their friendship be if Eddie thought there was a chance Steve would have said no, would have ever said no in a million years? Apparently he had given Eddie reason to believe that he wouldn’t support him to the ends of the Earth. Now, watching as Eddie stood there, smoke billowing from his lips, his whole body radiating light - radiating the pure essence of Eddie – all because he had been onstage making music (and maybe, in some small part, because Steve had been there to see it), Steve needed to make sure that he wouldn’t miss this – could never miss it – if he could help it. 

But he couldn’t say it, not in so many words, not when they felt so heavy on his tongue. It was so foreign to him – knowing what he wanted to say but not being sure how to say it, or why he even wanted to. He licked his lips and cleared his throat, as if that would make the words come out any easier. It didn’t. 

“I liked it. A lot,” he said finally, hoping that Eddie would somehow sense all the other, bigger words, behind those five small ones, the words for all the things he wanted to say but didn’t quite understand. 

“Yeah?” Eddie asked, taking a step closer to Steve. 

“I liked the LOUDNESS song,” Steve continued, shoving his hands in his pockets. He felt Eddie’s eyes roaming his face. It should have been a familiar feeling – Eddie looked at him all the time – but he felt laid bare in a way that he had never felt before. What is this?  

“Good,” Eddie said, bracing a hand against the wall just above Steve’s shoulder. Eddie’s tobacco-laced breath ghosting across Steve’s cheek should have been gross – maybe even was gross – but Steve thought he might have missed it, should it have disappeared. 

“I played it for you,” Eddie said in a stage whisper, smiling as though he had revealed some great secret. 

“I bet you say that to all the boys,” Steve smirked, smacking Eddie’s arm so lightly that it was really just a brush of fingers against leather ( a caress, his mind supplied, but he pushed the word away). 

“Nope. Just you, sweetheart,” Eddie said. 

Steve’s eyes dropped to Eddie’s lips, as they were wont to do when the other boy was that close ( god, he was so close ) and for the first time, his mind was filled with a singular, all-consuming urge. 

Kiss him, kiss him, kiss him.

Steve took a sharp breath through his nose. He felt as though he had been slapped, the hand hidden in his pocket clenching into a fist, his body flattening itself against the wall as if trying to melt into the brick. 

Kiss him, kiss him, kiss him.

He wrenched his eyes away from Eddie’s lips, meeting the other boy’s gaze. His eyes darted between Steve’s, and though the look in Eddie’s eyes never changed, he must have seen something there. He let the arm bracketing Steve fall as he twisted to rest against the wall directly next to Steve. Whatever he had seen in Steve’s eyes must not have bothered him all too much, because Eddie’s shoulder pressed against his when he was finally settled in his new spot. 

Get a grip, Harrington, he thought. It was a perfectly normal urge - a symptom of his friendly affection. Hell, he had wanted to kiss Robin once, a million years ago, and that was just because he liked her so much, his brain didn’t quite know how to deal with it. It hadn’t realized that a feeling that big could be platonic but it could - it was. Apparently, his brain just liked to get the wires crossed, liked to make him think he wanted to kiss anyone he cared about in any way. 

“If you really like LOUDNESS,” Eddie said, breaking the silence. “I have a vinyl you could borrow. You could come over tonight and get it.”

“Yeah, sure,” Steve said, surprised with just how normal his voice sounded when he spoke. 

“Wanna go now?” Eddie asked. 

“Sure, let me go get Rob,” Steve said.

He swore he could feel Eddie tense next to him.

“I was her ride,” he continued.

“Right. Okay,” Eddie said, his words clipped. Steve glanced at Eddie. That was one of his Eddie-isms: he never got upset. Not really. Sure, sometimes he’d get loud and yell ( how many times do I have to tell you people, this IS music ) but there was always a sense that he didn’t mean it, that underneath it all, he was laughing. But every once in a blue moon, Eddie’s voice would lose its musicality, his usual verbosity reduced to monosyllables, and Steve would wonder if he had done something wrong. But each time, Eddie would shake it off in a blink of an eye, and he would be himself again. Like now. “I’ll head out now and meet you at mine?” 

“Okay,” Steve nodded.

“Tell Nancy bye for me,” Eddie said and patted his arm before pushing off of the wall, crossing the parking lot to his van. He turned back to Steve, waving before he climbed into the driver’s seat. 

Steve watched him drive out of the lot, standing motionless. He wished he had had the sense to ask Eddie for another cigarette. 

The desperate craving for nicotine spurred him into motion. He jogged across the lot to his own car, wrenching open the passenger door and rooting through the glovebox. He pulled out a badly crumpled pack of Benson and Hedges triumphantly. There was a lighter tucked inside the pack along with a few bent, stale cigarettes. He pulled one out and lit it, wincing against the acrid taste of too-old tobacco. 

He leaned against the side of the car, stalling. If Eddie knew what had been going through his head only minutes ago, he would have never invited Steve over. If Eddie knew, everything would change, and Steve didn’t know if that was something he could handle. So Eddie could never know. 

Because Eddie may flirt, but he didn’t mean anything by it. That was another thing about Eddie: he would flirt with a speck of dust if it hung around long enough. It was the first thing he had noticed about Eddie when he had really started to get to know him. Well, the first thing he had noticed about Eddie was the broken bottle he was holding against his neck, and the second had been his complete lack of regard for personal space, but his almost compulsive flirting was a close third. It should have been annoying, but Eddie was so god damned charming , with his big eyes that always seemed to sparkle with laughter even when he was silent, and his theatricality, and the way he was so unapologetically Eddie. The flirtation was just part of the deal. It was something that became precious, endearing, another one of his Eddie-isms. He thought that, perhaps, Eddie flirted for the same reason that Steve motherhenned – to remind himself that he existed. Steve felt bereft at the idea of it disappearing. He imagined the Eddie he knew, the Eddie that had become one of the foundational pillars of his happiness, becoming a cardboard cutout version of himself, devoid of the casual touches, no longer pushing his buttons, all because once – just once – Steve had barely considered the mere idea of kissing him and he felt… He felt… He didn’t know what he felt, but he knew that it was an unimaginable, unacceptable outcome. 

He had been standing outside so long now that Eddie was likely already home, waiting for him and Robin to arrive. And though the thought of seeing Eddie after having (once, just once ) thought about kissing him made him want to turn tail and run until he couldn’t run anymore, the thought of Eddie waiting up for him only to be disappointed was worse. He made his way back into the bar to find Nancy and Robin. 

They were sat at a table near the door. 

“Where’s Eddie?” Robin asked as he approached, her eyes darting expectantly to the door. 

“He went home. He asked me to swing by and pick up a vinyl tonight,” he said, looking at Robin. “So… we better get going.”

Nancy and Robin glanced at each other, once again doing that thing that annoyed him so much — communicating through a series of indecipherable looks. It mostly annoyed him so much because he couldn’t get the hang of it. Robin would try to tell him things through looks alone all the time, but he always needed to resort to lip reading. 

“I don’t know,” Robin said, turning back to Steve. “I don’t think I’m up to going to Eddie’s. I’m kind of tired.”

“I can see if they’ll let me use the phone. I can call Eddie and tell him I’ll come by some other time,” Steve shrugged. 

“No!” Robin and Nancy both said at once. 

“O-kaaay,” Steve said. “Are you suggesting I just, what, not show up?” 

“No, you should still go. He wants to see you,” Nancy said. 

“He just saw me, it’ll be fine as long as I call him,” Steve said, raising his eyebrows at Nancy. “He’ll understand that I have to get Rob home.”

“Nance can drive me home,” Robin said. 

“Yeah, Robin’s is on the way, I don’t mind,” Nancy said, nodding vehemently.

“Why are you two acting so weird?” Steve asked, baffled. “Like weirder than usual.”

“We’re not acting weird. We just really think you should go to Eddie’s,” Robin urged, resting a hand on his forearm.

“What’s the vinyl, anyway?” Nancy asked, squinting her eyes, her voice taking on the edge of a journalist trying to wheedle out her next scoop.

“Cool it, Cronkite, it’s just the band that does one of the songs they sang tonight,” Steve said.

“ We Could Be Together?” They asked, once again in unison. 

“You guys have to stop doing that,” Steve said. “And yes. Why?”

Robin and Nancy passed another cryptic look between themselves. 

“No reason,” Robin said.

‘It’s nothing,” Nancy added. 

“I’ll leave you a message on your machine when I get home safe,” Robin said, pushing Steve away from the table. “Go.”

“Okay, okay, I’m going,” he said, blinking at Nancy and Robin in confusion. He shook his head at them. 

“Very. Weird,” he added, punctuating each word by jabbing a finger first at Nancy, then at Robin. 

“Yeah, yeah, bye, dingus,” Robin said, shooing him.

“See you, Steve,” Nancy said, giggling. 

“Bye, I guess,” Steve said as he turned to leave. 

As he turned his back to them, he heard Robin whisper, “Those poor, poor boys.”

Nancy giggled again. 

If they wanted to act like a couple of riddle-wielding bridge trolls, so be it. He wasn’t entertaining it any longer. 

He left the bar and drove towards ( certain death ) Eddie’s. 

***

Several minutes later, he rapped his knuckles against the door of Eddie’s trailer, shoving his hands into his pockets and rocking from heel to toe as he waited. His stomach tied itself into methodical knots with each second that went by. 

“Who goes there?” Eddie boomed through the door, his voice pitched down. 

“Me,” Steve said, some of his nervousness dissipating as a grin crept across his face. 

“Me who?” The deep voice asked. 

“Eddie!” Steve laughed, rapping on the door again. 

“I’m Eddie, who are you? Are you Eddie, too? Then there’s a pair of us—“

“Jesus, Eddie! Steve!! It’s Steve!!”

The trailer door swung outwards.

“Well, why didn’t you just say so?” Eddie said in his normal register, laughter curling around his words. “Come in!”

“You are so annoying,” Steve said, pushing past him as he entered the trailer. 

“And yet, you’re smiling.”

Steve twisted his face into a scowl, not without difficulty.

“I’m not.”

“How right you are, my mistake,” Eddie said, and it was his turn to smile. He started down the hall towards his bedroom. “Well, let’s get you that vinyl and get you on your way. Don’t want to keep Robin waiting. Is she still in the car?” 

“Rob’s not here.” 

“She’s not?” Eddie said, pausing his stride. 

“I had Nancy take her home,” Steve said, because taking the credit for the idea seemed easier than explaining that Nancy and Robin were acting like Pod-people. 

“Oh. Cool.” 

“Yeah. Cool,” Steve echoed, though he wasn’t sure what was cool at all. 

Eddie grabbed Steve’s arm without another word, practically dragging him the rest of the way to Eddie’s room. 

“Now I just have to, um, find it,” Eddie said, releasing Steve’s arm. He stood in the middle of his room, surveying the clutter with his hands on his hips. “Stand by.” 

“Standing by,” Steve said, taking in Eddie’s room. He had been in Eddie’s room plenty of times since he had come to know him, but he always noticed something new each time he found himself there. It wasn’t surprising, with the sheer amount of stuff the guy had in his room. 

This time, it was a small hand-lettered sign on the wall near the door that caught his eye. It read “no admittance except on party business”. 

“Don’t worry, you’re allowed in here. it’s not a D&D thing,” Eddie said, when he noticed where Steve was looking. 

“I know,” Steve said, because, miracle of miracles, for once he did. 

“You do?” Eddie asked, skeptical. 

“ Lord of the Rings, ” Steve said, feeling pretty proud of himself. He hadn’t read any of the Lord of the Rings books, at least not in full. He had tried to read The Fellowship of the Ring five or six times to appease Dustin’s pleading, but he always got stuck at the Tom Bombadil section. Try as he might, he just couldn’t get past it. But he was very familiar with everything that came before it, and that included Bilbo’s sign. 

“Be still my beating heart,” Eddie said, clutching his heart and stumbling back towards the edge of his bed, collapsing. “Steve Harrington’s read The Lord of the Rings. ” 

“Well. Kind of,” Steve said. 

Eddie sat up straight again. 

“Kind of!?”

“I haven’t, uh, finished it. Yet. But I will!” Steve said. “Eventually.”

“Oh, thank god,” Eddie said. 

“What?” Steve asked.

“Well, if you had read them, you would have finally proven yourself to be completely and utterly flawless,” Eddie said.  “But you haven’t, so you still have one flaw. A fatal flaw, really.” 

“I have plenty of flaws,” Steve said, feeling a blush rise to his cheeks.

“Really?” Eddie said, cocking his head as if in thought. “I’ve only noticed the one.” 

“You’re just not looking hard enough,” Steve shrugged.

“Oh, beeelieve me you, Harrington, I am looking,” Eddie said. “I would love to find something about you that I could actually complain about.”

“You complain all the time,” Steve argued. 

“Yeah, about how great you are,” Eddie sighed, lying back on the bed again, his legs hanging off the edge. 

“What happened to looking for that record, Munson?” Steve asked, steering the conversation away from his greatness. If Eddie said too many more nice things about him, Steve was worried he’d start thinking about things he would like to say he had only thought about once (just once ). 

“Already found it. There,” Eddie said, pointing towards his dresser.

Steve walked over to the dresser, and sure enough, there were several records stacked on top of each other. He ran his fingers down their spines, looking for the word LOUDNESS.

“Hey, music man, don’t you know you should be storing these things vertically?” 

“I just put them there this morning. Don’t lecture me,” he said. “Orange one,” he added helpfully. 

Steve slid the record with the orange cover from the stack and crossed to sit next on the edge of Eddie’s bed. 

“We could listen to it now.” 

Steve wasn’t sure why the words had come out of his mouth, immediately wished he could shove them back in. The last thing he wanted to be at that moment was alone with Eddie in his bedroom. 

“No,  just take it with you when you leave,” Eddie said.

“Trying to get rid of me already?” Steve asked. 

“No,” Eddie said, nudging Steve’s knee with his. “If you borrow it, I’ll have to get it back from you. Then we have an excuse to hang out.” 

“What do you need an excuse for?” Steve asked, staring fixedly at the record in his hands. “We hang out all the time. You’re literally coming over next weekend. Pool day with your Hellfire disciples, remember?” 

“You mean with your brood,” Eddie corrected him.

“They’re yours as much as mine, at this point,” Steve said. 

“Yeah, but they’ll always love you most, Stevie. No contest,” Eddie said. “Everybody loves you most.” 

Before Steve could argue against that, Eddie sat up and tapped the record in Steve’s hands. “Don’t you dare give this back to me next weekend. Hold onto it for a while. It’ll give me something to look forward to.” 

Steve could hear the smile in Eddie’s voice, and though he wouldn’t let himself look at the other boy’s face, the urge crept back into the edges of his mind. 

Kiss him, kiss him, kiss him. 

His mouth went dry. 

Twice, then, he thought. I’ve thought about kissing him twice. 

And that was fine. Twice was hardly a habit.

Chapter Text

Steve had excused himself shortly after his second mental indiscretion of the night, borrowing an excuse from Robin and saying that he was tired. He was, in fact, completely wired, but he felt like he needed to be alone. 

He lay awake in bed that night, thinking himself into sleepless exhaustion. Everyone thought about kissing their best friends every once in a while, he was sure of it. It was probably even more common in people like him, who hadn’t been on a successful date in months. He was touch starved, that was all. 

By the time he got up for work the next morning, he had thoroughly convinced himself that there was nothing more to it. It was something that had happened twice in one night, that was all. It wouldn’t happen again.

He was glad that he worked more shifts than usual that week, seeing as Keith was on vacation and he was one of the few Family Video employees who wasn’t still in school. It meant he didn’t see much of anyone that week unless they stopped by during his shift, but it allowed him the space he needed to not think about it . 

By the time he saw Eddie again the following Saturday, he was even more confident in his conviction that what had gone through his mind after Eddie’s show was nothing to worry about. 

They were at the Buckley residence, getting ready to send Robin off to prom. 

“Boys, come take a picture with Robin,” Mrs. Buckley said, motioning them towards the stairs. 

“Oh, I don’t know, we’re a little underdressed,” Steve said, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly.

“Don’t be silly, get up there.”

Steve and Eddie shared a bewildered look before climbing the stairs to stand on either side of Robin. 

“I want to die,” Robin gritted out from her forced smile. 

“That makes three of us, kid,” Eddie said, putting an arm around her waist.

They all three winced as the flash bulb went off.  

“Now in front of the mantel,” Mrs. Buckley said. 

Robin groaned.

They migrated down the stairs to the mantel, once again standing on either side of Robin. She put her arms around each of their waists, and they draped their inside arms across her shoulders. Steve was distinctly aware of Eddie’s hand resting on his shoulder blade. 

“How is it you have two nice-” Mrs. Buckley paused as her eyes darted to Eddie. “Two young men here to chauffeur you to prom, but no date, Robin?” 

“Don’t know, Mom! Take the picture!”

The flash bulb went off again. 

“Alright. Pictures done,” Robin said, breaking away from the boys. 

“Can Eddie and I get copies of those when you get them developed, Mrs. Buckley?” 

Robin glared at him. 

“What? I don’t have many pictures of us,” Steve whispered.

“Yeah, me either,” Eddie agreed.

“Of course, Steve honey,” Mrs. Buckley said. “Robin, who is driving you home?”

“Nancy and Jonathan, Mom, I told you that.”

“Oh, right, have fun, sweetie.”

They were all quiet until Mrs. Buckley left the room.

 “You look beautiful, Robin. You really do,” Steve said, pulling Robin into a hug.

“Ew, Steve,” Robin said, her cheeks coloring as she swatted at his chest.

“He’s right, Buckley,” Eddie chimed in. “You’re an absolute vision.” 

“Thank you,” Robin said, smoothing out the front of her dress after Steve released her. 

“Why aren’t you telling him to shut up?” Steve asked. 

“Because he says nice stuff all the time,” Robin said. “He’s normal about it.” 

“And I’m not?” he asked, throwing an arm around Robin’s shoulders. 

“You get all gushy about it. You’re beautiful, Robin ” she said in that deep voice she insisted sounded like him but absolutely did not. “Like. Ew.”

“Okay, I’ll never tell you you’re pretty again,” Steve said.

“Now, I didn’t say anything about that,” Robin said, hugging her arm around Steve’s waist. 

“That’s enough, Tweedles Dee and Dum,” Eddie said, taking each of their free hands and walking backward to lead them towards the front door. “I wanna get out of here before we get roped into more pictures. 

“You can say that again,” Robin muttered, letting go of Steve.

“Are you sure you want to have dinner with us instead of your band friends?” Steve called out to her as he followed them down the walk towards his car. Jonathan (which meant Joyce ) was making Nancy dinner, so eating with them was out of the question.

“Well, seeing as I asked you both to prom and you both said no, it’s the least you can do,” Robin said. “It’s not too late for one of you to grow a heart and be my date.”

“We’re too old, Robin,” Steve said.

“And you’d draw a lot of attention with Stevie here on your arm. Return of the king and all that,” Eddie ribbed. 

“Don’t call me that,” Steve said.

“Okay, but Eddie is literally in high school. And Jonathan is going,” Robin whined.

“Jonathan is braver than us,” Steve said.

“Not really my scene, Buckley,” Eddie said. “I’d probably get a bucket of pig blood dumped on me before we even got to dance. Which, actually, would be kind of metal.” 

“Ugh, nevermind, you both suck,” she said, reaching for the passenger door.

“I got it,” Steve said, cutting in front of her to open the door.

“No, I got it,” Eddie said, pushing him out of the way.

“It’s my car!” Steve argued.

“She’s my friend!” 

“She was my friend first !” 

“Boys!” 

“Sorry,” they said in unison, their shoulders slumping like chastised school boys. They behaved for all of thirty seconds before they were both lunging for the door again, laughing as they pushed each other out of the way. In the end, Steve won out, opening the door. 

Eddie took his loss with dignity, bowing and motioning towards the open door. 

“Your chariot, Buckley,” he said.

Steve rolled his eyes and smirked at Robin as if to say can you believe this guy?

“You are both, and I can not emphasize this enough, the strangest people I have ever met,” Robin said, climbing into the car. 

“Are you sure you wanna do Benny’s?” Eddie asked, sliding into the backseat. “We can take you somewhere nicer. Like Enzo’s.”

“Enzo’s will be a madhouse tonight,” Robin said. “Besides, neither of you are dressed for anywhere nicer.” 

“This is my formal t-shirt, Robin,” Eddie said, pinching the fabric of his plain black t-shirt between his fingers. “It doesn’t have corpses or devils or severed heads on it or nuthin’.” 

“Alright, Eddie’s got on his Sunday best, are we still going to Benny’s?” Steve asked, pulling the car into the street. 

“I don’t know, Steve, Eddie is pretty dolled up,” Robin said, turning around to point at Eddie’s knees. “There aren’t even holes in his jeans.”

“Well, that’s cuz they aren’t mine,” Eddie shrugged. 

Steve turned a glance in the backseat at that. He turned back around quickly, tightening his grasp on the steering wheel. Eddie was wearing the jeans he had borrowed from Steve.

“Whose… are they?” Robin asked slowly. 

“Steve’s.”

“Steve’s,” Robin repeated.

“Yep,” Eddie said.

“So, those are like bonafide yuppy jeans. Are you wearing them on, like, a dare or something?” Robin said. She was studying Steve intently. 

Steve’s eyes met Eddie’s in the rearview mirror. The look on Eddie’s face was almost a challenge. Go ahead, Harrington. Explain it away, he heard an imaginary Eddie say in his mind. It was so clear he was trying to get under Steve’s skin. Well, two could play that game.

“They just looked better on him than they did on me,” Steve said. 

“How’d you figure that out?” Robin asked.

“I –uh. Just thought they would,” Steve said.

It was Eddie that broke eye contact in the mirror, pulling his hair across his face to hide a smile. 

“Did I mention that you guys are exceedingly strange?” Robin asked. 

“You know, I don’t think you have,” Steve replied. 

They did end up at Benny’s that night. Eddie and Steve ended up throwing french fries at each other across the table, though they did avoid getting any on Robin’s dress. That didn’t stop her from calling them a couple of embarrassing children. They pulled up in the school parking lot about an hour later. They walked Robin to the door so she could glance into the gym to see if her band friends were inside yet.

“I see them. Over by the wall. Obviously,” she said. “I guess this is it.”

“You’ll have fun. Promise.”

“Whatever, Steve,” Robin said, rolling her eyes. “I’m still annoyed with you.”

“I know. I’m sorry,” Steve said. “We talked about this.”

“I know, I know,” Robin said.

“Call us if you need anything,” Eddie said.

“Do not do anything he would do,” Steve said, jerking a thumb towards Eddie.

“No worries there,” Robin laughed. “You two behave yourselves.” 

With that, she dipped inside the gymnasium doors. 

Steve started back across the parking lot. When he got to the car, he realized Eddie had stopped some ways back, crouched to examine something on the blacktop.

“Eds!” he called.

Eddie picked up whatever he was looking at and jogged over to Steve.

“Look what I found,” Eddie said when he reached him. He held up a slightly-trod-upon white carnation. “Bootin-thingy.”

“Boutonnière,” Steve corrected. 

“Yeah, that,” Eddie said sunnily. He held it up to the lapel of Steve’s bomber jacket. “It goes here, right?” 

Steve felt the impulse to say It doesn’t go on this type of jacket or it’s all nasty from the ground, don’t touch me with it. But when he opened his mouth, all that came out was, “Yeah.” 

“How does it stick?”

“Is there a pin?” Steve asked. “In the stem?”

“Yeah,” Eddie replied, pulling out a pin with a little pearlescent bead at the end. “I just pin it?”

“Yeah, you’ll have to do it from the inside though,” Steve said quietly. 

Eddie reached a hand inside Steve’s jacket, feeling around the fabric to find the right place to pin. His rings brushed against Steve’s chest, cold even through his t-shirt. Eddie took a stab.

“Shit, hold this for a sec,” Eddie said, his face twisting up in pain.

Steve didn’t know why he listened, why he didn’t just tell Eddie it wasn’t worth the effort. It could be that Eddie’s thumb, which sported a tiny bead of blood, had just disappeared between his lips. Steve couldn’t look away, swallowing as his throat went dry once again. You don’t want to kiss him , he thought.

“Ouch,” Eddie said, pulling his thumb from his mouth with a soft pop. Steve’s breath hitched.

“You okay?” 

“Yeah, are you?” Eddie asked. 

“Why wouldn’t I be?” Steve replied. 

“You just look like a fish out of water,” Eddie said, letting his face go slack, his mouth hanging open. “Like that.”

“I don’t look like that,” Steve protested.

“Do, too,” Eddie said, returning to his struggle with the boutonniere. “So. You and Buckley.”

“What about it?”

“Why didn’t you take her to prom?”

“I mean, you know. How lame would it be if I showed up to prom? Everyone would think I was trying to relive my glory days. I just… I wouldn’t handle the attention well. I love Robin, but I can’t put myself through that humiliation,” Steve said. “We talked about it. She understands. I just had to agree to her terms.”

“Which were?”

“She gets to complain about it for the rest of our natural born lives, and into the afterlife if there is one,” Steve answered, a smile curling his lips. 

“So you two aren’t… ya know?”

“Dating?” Steve laughed. “No way.” 

Apparently, Robin hadn’t told Eddie yet. He hoped the other boy wouldn’t press the issue too hard, or worse, ask if Steve thought he should make a move on Robin. His mind began to race to think of the least incriminating way to tell Eddie there wasn’t a chance.

“But… you wish you were,” Eddie said, still battling the pin.

“I mean, I did. For like a week or two, in the beginning,” Steve admitted. “But, um, she’s not right for me.” 

“What, you think you could do better than Buckley ?” Eddie scoffed.

“Probably not. But she and I are destined to be strictly platonic,” Steve said. 

“Cool.” 

Steve swallowed as he gathered up the courage to ask the next question.

“Are you, uh, interested? In Robin?” 

“Me? Not even a little bit,” Eddie said, his eyes darting to Steve’s. “Just wanted to know if you were.”

“Oh,” Steve said lamely.

“Got it,” Eddie smiled triumphantly. He placed his palm flat on Steve’s chest as he leaned back to examine his handiwork. “Very nice.”

“More like ridiculous,” Steve retorted.

“Nah. You make anything look good, pretty boy,” Eddie said, balling the hand on Steve’s chest into a fist as he leaned forward in typical Eddie fashion, stopping only when their noses were less than an inch away from each other. Their breath commingled in the infinitesimal space between them. 

You don’t want to kiss him.

“You know that.”

“I do?” Steve breathed. 

“Mhm,” Eddie confirmed. “You ready to take me home?”

“Excuse me?” 

“You drove me here,” Eddie said, his hand dropping from Steve’s chest. “So you gotta take me home.”

“Oh. Right,” Steve faltered, tugging at his collar. “That.”

The ride back to Eddie’s was uncharacteristically silent. A tension had settled over the cab from the moment they had pulled out of the school parking lot. Eddie seemed fidgety – more fidgety than usual – and Steve would be lying if he said he didn’t feel a bit restless himself. Because he could still feel Eddie’s hand on his chest like a brand, and if he closed his eyes, all he could see was Eddie’s thumb in his mouth. And Eddie had nice hair, and he looked good in Steve’s jeans, and his eyes – his eyes made Steve’s chest feel like molten metal if he thought about them for too long. And maybe these feelings weren’t a symptom of touch starvation and friendly affection. Maybe it was something else entirely.

Steve came to that final realization as he pulled into Eddie’s spot at the trailer park. 

Eddie got out of the car wordlessly and came around to the driver’s side. Steve cranked down the window.

“Don’t forget. My house tomorrow for boys' day,” Steve said, looking up at Eddie.

”Wouldn’t miss it for the world, Harrington,” Eddie said. His eyes dropped to Steve’s chest. “You can take it off if it’s bothering you.”

Steve looked down to find that his hand had migrated to the boutonniere on his chest, his fingers worrying the stem.

“It’s not,” he said, pulling his hand away quickly. “I don’t want to.”

Eddie’s face broke into that winsome smile. Steve’s breath caught in his throat again, and – yeah. Maybe it wasn’t friendly affection at all. 

“See you tomorrow, Stevie,” Eddie said, reaching through the window to squeeze Steve’s shoulder. 

“Not if I see you first,” Steve said, leaning into Eddie’s touch before he could think better of it. 

Later in his bedroom, as he got undressed for bed, Steve carefully unpinned the flower from his jacket. He brought it to his nose, inhaling as he collapsed back onto his mattress. 

He groaned, turning to press his cheek against his comforter. The cork board above his bed caught his eye as he twirled the boutonnière between his thumb and forefinger.

It seemed to him that his body moved at its own volition as he climbed up on his knees and made for the cork board. He pulled the pin from the stem of the flower, holding it between his teeth as he positioned the flower next to the j-card from Eddie’s tape. When he was satisfied with its position, he fixed the flower there with the boutonnière pin. 

He sat back on his heels, taking in the tiny collage (if two items could be a collage) of things Eddie had given him, biting his thumbnail. Several silent minutes stretched out around him as he stared. 

“Shit,” he whispered to himself, tipping forward and resting his forehead against the frame of the cork board.”You like him.” 

As soon as the words left his lips, it was like a floodgate opened in his chest, and it was frightening but it was a relief. 

“I like Eddie ,” he whispered again. “Fuck.” 

Chapter Text

The earth-shattering nature of Steve’s late-night realization was only made more apparent by the nervous energy that possessed him when he woke up and remembered Eddie was coming over again that day. He wasn’t sure what he would do with himself. He tried to ground his nerves by reminding himself that he had had a crush on Eddie for a while and had managed to hang out with him without embarrassing himself. The only thing that had changed was now he had a name for how he was feeling, and that didn’t mean anything at all. At least, he hoped it didn’t. 

Steve thanked his lucky stars that the younger boys would be there to provide a buffer, at least. He only hoped that Dustin wouldn’t launch into another one of his “I just want you to be happy” diatribes in front of Eddie. He didn’t handle that well under normal circumstances, but he worried that Dustin would take one look at his face and somehow divine that after months of romanceless existence, Steve finally was interested in someone and try to wheedle it out of him. The thought was daunting on its own, but the fact that Eddie would be there to watch it all go down was utterly terrifying. 

Steve threw himself into preparing for the pool day to distract himself. He ran out to the grocery store to get snacks and food for lunch, then did some general tidying around the house and backyard. When the younger set of boys came through the side gate at half past twelve, he was scooping leaves out of the pool with a net. 

“I told you to come at one,” Steve said as Dustin approached him by the pool.

“We were bored,” Dustin shrugged. 

“Well, if you’re bored, you won’t mind finishing this up for me,” Steve said, handing Dustin the pool net. 

“Aw, Steve, come on,” Dustin complained, looking at the net in disgust as he took it in hand. 

“Get to it, Henderson,” Steve said, tugging the bill of Dustin’s hat down over his eyes. 

“Yeah, Dustin, get to it,” Mike jeered. 

“Careful, Mike, I have another net. The job would get done faster with two of you,” Steve warned him as he walked over to the other three boys. He slung an arm around Will’s shoulders. “What do you think, Will? Should we put him to work?” 

Will shrugged bashfully, his gaze fixed on his own feet. He had been a little shy around Steve since he came back from California, but then he was a shy kid in general. 

“Well, what’s the verdict?” Steve asked. 

“Probably,” Will said, shooting a smile at Mike. 

“I vote yes,” Lucas chimed in. 

“Traitors,” Mike said, trudging over to the pool shed to get the second net without any further asking from Steve. 

“You guys aren’t getting off Scot-free,” Steve said, pulling Will towards the house and motioning Lucas to follow. They went through the backdoor and into the kitchen. “Lucas, there’s a bag of ice in the freezer in the garage. Will, start unpacking these into the cooler,” Steve said, handing him a twelve-pack of New Coke and a twelve-pack of Pepsi.

When the boys had finished filling the cooler and dragged it into the backyard, Steve let them loose. 

“You know the drill: no running, no peeing in the pool, no drowning each other,” Steve said, setting a stack of pool towels on the patio table and the four boys made ready to get into the pool. 

“We know ,” Dustin called from mid-cannonball. 

Steve sat on the edge of the pool, dangling his legs into the water. When Will pushed Mike into the deep end, an idea sprung into his head.

“Actually,” he said after they were all comfortably in the pool. “I need you guys to do one more thing for me.”

They all groaned.

“No, you’re going to like this one,” Steve said. “I need help getting back at Eddie.” 

*** 

With their plan firmly in place, the boys began a rather heated round of the color game. Will was “it” and would be for a while, seeing as he was the slowest swimmer. Steve began setting up the grill if only to avoid being roped into refereeing. 

He had just gotten the charcoal going when Eddie sauntered into the backyard. 

“Greetings, gremlins,” Eddie shouted over the boys’ splashing. 

“Hey, Eddie!” Dustin called back, waving manically. 

The other boys erupted into a chorus of hellos and waves. 

Eddie waved back to them with both hands, matching their fervor. 

“Man, I like them so much better when they aren’t trying so hard to be cool,” Eddie said in lieu of a greeting. “I wish everyone was that pumped when I walked into a place. I feel like a goddamn rockstar.”

“You are a rockstar, Eds,” Steve said, putting the cover on the grill. 

“In nobody’s eyes but yours,” Eddie replied. 

There was a burst of chaos from the pool and they turned to find Will and Mike fighting to the death, Mike thrashing in the water as Will clung to him like a koala, screaming, “You’re it, you’re it, you’re it!” 

“Quick question,” Steve asked as he stared on in horror. “When have they ever tried to be cool?” 

“When Henderson, Sinclair, and Baby Wheeler first joined Hellfire. By about three meetings in, they were geeking out too hard to keep up the ruse,” Eddie said, with a fond smile. “And I decided they weren’t so bad.” 

“Well, you’re about to see them in full geek mode. Especially those two,” Steve said, nodding towards Mike and Will. Mike had given up his struggle and was carrying on a conversation with the other two boys as though he wasn’t still wearing Will like a backpack. “Will really brings the dork out in Mike.”

“Yeah? Good, Wheeler needs it,” Eddie said. He turned back to Steve and gave him a once over. “And apparently you’re in full dad mode today.”

“I hate it when you say shit like that,” Steve groaned and feigned hitting Eddie with the grill brush he was holding. 

“I’d quit saying it if you didn’t try so hard to look the part,” Eddie said, gesturing at Steve’s whole person. 

Steve looked down at himself, taking in his get-up. He was wearing an apron — sans shirt — and swim trucks. Maybe Eddie had a point. The grill brush in his hand certainly didn’t help. 

“I dig this,” Eddie said, biting his lip as he grinned and hooked his finger in the bib of Steve’s apron. 

“I don’t look like a dad,” Steve grumbled, throwing the grill brush down on a deck chair and quickly untying his apron. His cheeks burned hot as he pulled off the apron, balling it up and hurling it at Eddie.

“You’re a hot dad if that makes it any better,” Eddie said, catching the apron and slinging it over his shoulder. 

Steve scrubbed a hand over his face. It most certainly did not make it better. Eddie had been there for all of five minutes and he was already making Steve’s stomach feel all flippy, which was the very last thing he needed when his world had been turned upside down less than twenty-four hours ago. To make things worse, his original plan had been “pretend this wasn’t happening until further notice” was quickly falling apart because Eddie was so damn… Eddie all the time. 

Don’t read into it, Harrington. It’s Eddie. He flirts. You saw him flirt with an old woman at the store last month, he thought. He doesn’t mean anything by it.  

“Steve!” Mike yelled from the pool, saving Steve from the onslaught of holy shit that was Eddie Munson.

“What?”

“Dustin keeps doing the shoulder thing so he can slip away when we grab him,” Mike whined. Apparently, he had freed himself from Will and they had resumed their game. 

“Then just tag him. You know, like you’re supposed to? You guys don’t have to put each other in a damn full Nelson. You’re playing the color game, for chrissake,” Steve scolded. 

“Just tell him he’s cheating,” Lucas said.

“Dustin, you’re cheating,” Steve monotoned.

“Mike’s cheating, too!” Dustin shouted.

“Jesus H. Christ,” Steve swore under his breath.

“Boys, boys,” Eddie said, walking to the edge of the pool with arms outstretched at either side, like some benevolent king making a proclamation. “You’re acting like a bunch of third graders, telling on each other to Steve like this.” 

“Oh, like you’re any better,” Dustin retorted.

“When do I ever tattle to Steve?” Eddie asked. 

“Not to Steve. You tattle on Steve. Like all the time,” Lucas clarified. 

“Roooooobin, Steve won’t give me a sip of his beer,” Dustin mocked. “Roooooobin, Steve won’t let me wear his sunglasses. Rooooob—“ 

“What’s with the tone? I thought we talked about the tone; did we not talk about the tone?” Eddie huffed, looking a bit flushed. “And I don’t sound like that.”

“You totally do,” Will laughed.

“Do I sound like that?” Eddie asked, turning his back to the pool to face Steve. 

“I don’t know, if Will the Wise says so it must be true,” Steve answered. 

“Damn, you’re right, I can’t contradict Will the Wise,” Eddie smirked.

Just then, Dustin caught Steve’s eye from where he was floating in the pool, just behind where Eddie stood. Dustin raised his eyebrow in question, and Steve gave a quick nod. 

“You know, Eds,” Steve trailed off, watching out of the corner of his eye as Dustin poked Lucas and nodded towards Eddie. 

“What?” Eddie replied.

“I just wanted to say…” Steve continued, buying time as Lucas glanced at Mike, who grabbed Will’s wrist and dragged him towards the edge of the pool behind Eddie.

“Spit it out, Stevie.” 

“I just wanted to let you know you look incredibly pushable right now,” Steve finished.

“ Au contraire . Can’t push a guy who’s expecting it,” Eddie said, throwing Steve’s apron to the ground and widening his stance to brace himself. “I’ve had my eye on you this whole time, Harrington, don’t think I haven’t.” 

“I know you have,” Steve said, smirking as he crossed his arms across his chest. “That’s why I called in reinforcements.” 

“You wha-“

Edie was cut off by Dustin and Will’s hands wrapping around his ankles and Lucas and Mike jumping up to grapple at his knees. He howled as he was toppled backward into the pool. 

The younger boys broke out into a fit of laughter as Eddie fought against them, roaring Steve’s name when he finally broke free. 

“You weaponized them,” Eddie yelled, pushing his hair out of his face and shooting a withering look Steve’s way. “I can’t believe you weaponized the children.” 

“You said it best, Munson. I fight dirty,” Steve said.

Eddie’s face cracked into a smile. 

“You are absolutely devious. And you ,” Eddie said, pointing at the boys, “are all little shits.”

Eddie launched himself at Mike, who happened to be the nearest victim and pulled him into a headlock. The three other boys came to Mike’s rescue, attacking Eddie from all sides.

“Alright, get off me, you rabid animals,” Eddie ordered. He waded to the edge of the pool, weighed down by Dustin and Will hanging off him as they tried to dunk him under again. Eddie made a big show of trying to escape.

“Off, I say!” 

“That’s enough,” Steve chimed in. “He’s learned his lesson.”

“The only lesson I’ve learned is where these assholes’ loyalties lie,” Eddie said. “And that I have to begin plotting against all five of you.”

“Good luck with that!” Dustin said.

“That was pretty good, Harrington, I have to admit,” Eddie said, shucking off his now-soaked shirt and tossing it at Steve.

The shirt hit Steve in the chest and fell to the ground with a splat, seeing as he was too busy trying (and failing miserably) to look at anything but Eddie to deflect the projectile. 

His eyes skimmed over Eddie’s chest, catching on his tattoos. He had never really looked at them up close, but god did he want to. His eyes traveled down to Eddie’s demobat scars. It was funny; he had his own fair share of similar scars, but he thought they looked less appealing on his own skin. Eddie’s though — they looked good . They made Eddie look like some sort of rugged action hero. Another realization washed over him as heat settled in the pit of his stomach. It shouldn’t have been surprising, because he had an all-consuming crush on the guy, but it surprised Steve all the same. Eddie was hot. Like, really fucking hot.

Steve cleared his throat, replying to Eddie a few beats too late for his hesitation not to be noticeable.

“I give as good as I get,” he croaked. He cleared his throat again.

Eddie raised an eyebrow at him as he sat down on a deck chair and began untying his sopping-wet tennis shoes. 

“That a promise?” Eddie leered. 

“More of a threat,” Steve said. He immediately wished he could shove the words back in his mouth. It was a stupid line and a bad one at that. He picked Eddie’s shirt up off the ground and draped it over the back of Eddie’s chair to dry. He forced himself to focus on smoothing out the folds in the fabric of Eddie’s shirt so it dried all the way through. 

“Is it now?” Eddie said, his voice low as he leaned against the back of the chair so his face was between Steve and the shirt he was fidgeting with. “I think I like that better than a promise.”

Steve swallowed nervously, his eyes darting to Eddie’s lips. Eddie wouldn’t be doing this if he knew how it affected you , the voice in the back of his head whispered, and his heart twinged at the thought. 

“I — uh — I have to get lunch ready,” Steve stammered, stepping back from the chair to put some space between himself at the other boy. “You can either get a towel and come with or you can stay out here and play lifeguard.” 

He turned on his heel and headed for the house without waiting to see which option Eddie chose.

***

Eddie had chosen to play lifeguard. Steve wasn’t sure if he was disappointed or relieved. The twenty minutes he spent inside slicing up tomatoes and onions and tearing up lettuce for the hamburgers had given him time to bring his pulse down to something closer to baseline. It couldn’t quite reach normal, because every time he glanced out the window into the backyard, there was Eddie in all his bare-chested glory. 

It didn’t help that he was so god damn good with the younger boys. It made sense that he was good with them – he had been even before he had been inducted into their weird little family by becoming embroiled in their top-secret, shared interdimensional trauma – but it pulled at Steve’s heartstrings all the same. 

When Steve came out to grill the burgers, Eddie was sitting at the patio table with Will, gesticulating wildly as he spoke – probably about Dungeons and Dragons – while Will looked on with unabashed awe. Steve smiled to himself as he watched them. He had known that Will and Eddie would get along; they probably were the two biggest Dungeon and Dragons geeks in the entire midwest, if not the whole world. 

“Steve!” Dustin called from the pool, distracting him from his thoughts. 

“What?” 

“How long can you hold your breath?” the younger boy asked. 

“I dunno. A minute and a half maybe?” Steve shrugged. 

“That’s all?” Dustin said, a bit disappointed. “Eddie said you were underwater for like six minutes at Lover’s Lake.”

“And Eddie has never embellished anything,” Lucas rolled his eyes where he was floating next to Dustin in the pool. 

“It was two minutes at most,” Steve said.

“Okay, I guess two minutes is the time to beat.” 

Mike was sitting at the edge of the pool, holding his watch. 

“You dorks ready?” he asked. 

“You’re going down, Henderson,” Lucas said before sucking in a long breath.

“Ready. Set. Go!” 

Both of the boys in the pool dipped under the water simultaneously. 

Steve shook his head with an amused smile as he flipped the burgers. 

“What’re you so happy about?” 

Eddie’s voice at his shoulder made him jump. He hadn’t noticed his approach.

“Them,” he said, nodding towards the pool. “It’s cool to see them just be…”

“Kids?” Eddie supplied. 

“Yeah,” Steve nodded. 

“They’re lucky they have you. You know, to give them a space where they feel safe enough to do that. Given, you know, everything,” Eddie continued. 

Steve nodded again. He was beginning to overheat a bit. Whether that was due to the grill in front of him or Eddie standing so close behind him, he wasn’t sure he wanted to know. 

“Me, on the other hand. Not so lucky. I can’t believe you’ve got me at a backyard barbeque on a Sunday,” Eddie said. “You’ve civilized me.” 

“You’ve got a long way to go before you’re civilized, Eds,” Steve laughed. 

“I’m closer than I was. You’ll make a domesticated man out of me yet.” 

“I don’t know if that’s possible,” Steve replied. He also didn’t know if he liked the idea. That was one of his favorite things about Eddie – his wildness. 

“If anyone can do it, you can. By this time next year, I’ll have cut my hair and started wearing polo shirts. You’ll want to show me off at the country club,” Eddie teased. 

Steve’s heart clenched at the idea of Eddie cutting his hair. He had had no idea he was so emotionally attached to it, but the idea of Eddie getting some sort of yuppie cut was one of the most tragic images Steve could conjure up. But showing up somewhere with Eddie on his arm – in a world where that was possible – being allowed to show him off, to say this guy is here with me … That did make a pleasant little pang of heat twist through his stomach. He would like that very much.

On top of that, he was pretty sure Eddie knew what he was doing. He had to know that this was the kind of conversation that would have usually rendered Steve silent or at the very least stuttering. Hell, he had had enough sense to give Steve time to recover alone when he’d gotten Steve all flustered earlier in the afternoon. He wondered what Eddie would do if he responded in kind. Would he desert under fire? He supposed there was only one way to find out. 

“Cut your hair and you’ll break my heart, Munson,” Steve said, the picture of cool and collected as he took the burgers off the grill. It wasn’t his best line by a long shot, but it was better than he usually gave when it came to Eddie. 

“B-break your heart?” Eddie sputtered. 

“Yep. I’d be completely inconsolable. There’s a shortage of perfect hair in the world,” Steve pushed on, despite the nerves he felt crawling in the pit of his stomach.

“ Perfect ?”

“Mhm.” 

Steve glanced at the other boy and found that he was blushing so fiercely that even his chest was pink. 

“Oh,” Eddie said, clearing his throat. “Then I guess I better not.”

“Not if you know what’s good for you,” Steve said, his nerves dissipating a bit as he watched Eddie bring a hand to his mouth to cover a shy smile. It felt like a triumph. He had shaken the great, unshakeable Eddie Munson. Well, he was a bit high-strung, but that part of him usually only made appearances during life-or-death situations. When it came to things like this, interpersonal, flirtatious stuff, Eddie was imperturbable. 

Or he had been. Now he seemed rather incapable of forming words. 

“I – um – You —,” Eddie shook his head in frustration, letting out a sigh. “I’m just – um, going to go over there. And, um, tell the gremlins that lunch is ready.” 

“Sounds good,” Steve said, smiling as Eddie walked over to the pool, throwing several glances over his shoulder back at Steve. 

Steve rode that high through lunch and into cleaning up. He felt like he was on top of the world. It wasn’t until he was loading the last dish into the dishwasher that he was hit by a less-than-pleasant thought. What if Eddie had gotten shy because he didn’t like it when Steve flirted back? What if was all some stupid game of chicken? What Eddie just enjoyed pushing the boundaries to see if Steve would crack? Steve was cracking, alright, but not in the way that was expected by men who flirted with their friends because they thought it was funny. Eddie could push the boundaries as far as he wanted,  but Steve wouldn’t be the one to put a stop to it; he wanted it too badly. The sick feeling of disappointment was coursing through his body when he rejoined the group outside. 

Eddie was trying to rouse the boys into some sort of activity. 

“Come on, Henderson. You and Stevie against me and the Wonder Twin. Mike and Lucas go up against the winners,” Eddie said as Steve sat on the edge of the pool. 

Me and Dustin versus you and Will in what?” Steve asked.

“Shoulder wars. Obviously,” Eddie said. 

“I told him that strictly goes against the “no drowning each other” rule,” Dustin said. 

“And I told him he’s just scared of losing,” Eddie said. 

“I don’t see a problem with it,” Steve shrugged. 

“You always say we’ll get hurt if we –” Dustin began to protest.

“Shush. Don’t let him think about it too much, Henderson. Get your ass in the pool,” Eddie said, dragging Will over to the deep end with him. Eddie cannonballed in, followed closely by Will. 

Dustin gave Steve a long-suffering look. 

“Do we have to?” he asked. 

“You really are scared we’re going to lose, aren’t you?” Steve asked.

“Eddie wins everything ,” Dustin complained. 

“That’s only because he hasn’t been up against Steve Harrington. Me and Lucas are the only ones here with a single ounce of athleticism in our bodies. Speaking of, you’re going down, Sinclair,” Steve said pointing at Lucas. 

“You have to win against Will and Eddie first,” Lucas said. 

“Oh, we’re going to win,” Steve said. 

Dustin reluctantly followed Steve into the pool. They waded to the shallow end where Eddie and Will were already waiting for them. 

“Up you go, Byers,” Eddie said, crouching so Will could climb up on his shoulders. Eddie groaned as he stood up. “You’re fucking heavy, kid.” 

“Never too late to give up, Munson,” Steve teased. 

“You wish, Harrington.” 

“Come on, Dustin, we have asses to kick,” Steve said, stooping down for Dustin to hop up. 

“Sinclair, you’re reffing,” Eddie yelled.

Lucas sat on the edge of the pool closest to them.

“Ready?” Lucas asked.

“Yep,” all four contenders agreed.

“Go!” 

Dustin and Will commenced pushing each other, neither of them making much headway against the other.

“Come on, Byers, take him out,” Eddie urged. 

Dustin gave Will a pretty good push, but Eddie’s grip on him was too tight for it to make much of a difference. 

“Dustin, you can do better than that,” Steve said, feeling rather helpless. He wasn’t allowed to do any pushing himself, and he didn’t particularly want to push Will anyway – he was the least pushable kid he had ever met – but he did wish he could take Eddie down a peg. 

Eddie must have had the same idea, but he resulted to psychological warfare. He caught Steve’s eye and winked at him – it was just a wink , it shouldn’t have worked as well as it did, but Steve’s resolve was already worn thin from every other instance of Eddie Munson is fucking hot that he’d had to suffer through that day. He went slack-jawed, his grip on Dustin’s leg loosening just as Will gave him a forceful push. 

“Shit!” he said as Dustin toppled over, turning as he tried to find a place he could grab onto Dustin’s leg to keep him up, but the movement only served to put him in the perfect position to catch Dustin’s foot in the face. 

“Shit!” he yelled again, covering his face with his hands as Dustin crashed into the water. 

“Hell yeah, Byers!” Eddie cheered, dumping the kid off his back and into the water ceremoniously. “Told you, Steve!”

Steve was still clutching his face. Dustin’s foot had gotten him pretty good.  His nose ached.

“Steve?” Eddie asked, his tone quickly shifting to one of worry as he waded closer to Steve. “You okay?”

“I’m fine,” Steve said, taking his hands from his face. 

“Fuck. No,  you’re not,” Eddie said, his eyes widening.

“No, I’m cool, Eds, I just–”

“Your nose is bleeding, Steve,” Eddie said. 

Steve touched a finger to his upper lip and found it came away bloody.

“I told you this was a bad idea,” Dustin said, floating behind Steve. 

“Yeah, yeah, you can ream me out as much as you want later, Henderson,” Eddie said, sternly. “After I get Stevie taken care of. Let’s get you inside.”

“It’s no big deal,” Steve insisted as Eddie put a hand on his shoulder, leading him to the pool stairs. 

“Sure it’s not, but we don’t want you getting blood in the pool, now do we?” 

“It’s chlorinated. Kills the germs,” Steve mumbled, following Eddie.

“Stevie, get out. Talk amongst yourselves, I’ve got this handled,” Eddie called back to the younger boys. 

“There is nothing to handle,” Steve said.

“Humor me,” Eddie said. 

Once they were in the house, Eddie beelined for the kitchen, grabbing a paper towel from the roll on the counter. 

“Head back, Stevie,” Eddie said, making to put the paper towel under Steve’s nose. 

“Eds, I can do it myself,” Steve said.

“Doctor’s orders,” Eddie said. 

Steve sighed, tilting his head back and letting Eddie hold the towel to his nose, pinching it at the bridge. 

“I should ask to see your credentials,” Steve said. 

“How’s this for credentials?” Eddie asked, holding up his free hand so Steve could see it from his tilted viewpoint and flipping him off. 

“Dubious at best,” Steve said. 

“Oh, dubious, that’s a big word for you, Harrington,” Eddie said. 

“Bite me,” Steve said with a scowl. The words had left his lips before he could think too much about what he was saying; he was a little bit distracted by his throbbing face. Of course, Eddie took the opportunity to catapult Steve even further into his misery. 

“Later, Stevie,” he said, and Steve could hear the smile in his voice without even looking at him. 

A series of images flashed through Steve’s mind in quick succession (Eddie’s teeth scraping against his neck, Eddie catching his lip between his teeth mid-kiss, Eddie biting at his inner thigh–). That was definitely enough of that , he thought, forcing himself to focus on the pain in his face. 

Eddie took the paper towel from Steve’s nose, tilting his face down so he could look at it. Steve’s heart skipped a beat when he realized just how close the other boy’s face was to his as Eddie studied him intently. 

“What’s the prognosis, doc?” Steve breathed. 

“Well. I don’t think you’ll need reconstructive surgery,” Eddie said. He lightly pressed a finger to Steve’s nose. “That hurt?”

“Not too bad,” Steve murmured. 

“How about this?” Eddie asked quietly, applying pressure to Steve’s face just next to his nose.

“No,” Steve answered. 

“Then I don’t think it’s broken,” Eddie said, smiling as his gaze met Steve’s. “Let’s get some ice on there so you’ll still be pretty tomorrow.”

Steve’s brain officially went offline, his mouth working wordlessly as he tried to think of something, anything to say.

Eddie chuckled.

“Hold this,” he said, bringing the paper towel back to Steve’s nose. 

Steve obeyed, pinching the bridge of his nose as Eddie made for the refrigerator, rummaging through the freezer. 

He returned with a bag of frozen peas wrapped in a dish towel. 

“Here you go,” Eddie said, handing it to him. 

“Thanks,” Steve said, holding it to his nose. 

“I’m sorry,” Eddie said, leaning against the kitchen counter. 

“Not your fault,” Steve replied, his voice muffled by the peas. 

“Kind of is,” Eddie said. 

“What’d you mean?” Steve said, tilting his head down to look at Eddie.

“You know. The whole –” Eddie threw Steve another wink. 

Steve’s stomach dropped. So he did know. Eddie knew exactly what he was doing to him. He was up to something and Steve wanted to know –

“Why?” Steve asked. 

“Why what?”

“Why do you do that?” Steve asked, sounding a little more accusatory than he had intended. 

Eddie flinched. He looked at Steve for a moment, his lips pursed in thought. 

“Just messing around,” Eddie said finally. 

Just messing around . The words hung heavy in the air between them. Steve’s stomach had dropped somewhere into the core of the Earth. He had no right to be disappointed; he shouldn’t have expected anything more. He was devastated all the same.

“Oh,” he said. 

“That’s what we do, isn’t it? Mess around?” Eddie asked, his voice oddly flat.

“Right,” Steve said.

“I’ll tell the other guys it’s time to clear out, okay?” Eddie said, pushing off the counter. 

“Okay,” Steve said, watching as Eddie went back outside. 

When he was alone, he tossed the bag of peas onto the floor. He braced himself against the edge of the counter, his head hanging down between his shoulders. 

“Stupid, stupid, stupid ,” Steve whispered to himself. 

A drop of blood fell onto the counter. He wiped his nose with the back of his hand. 

“You’re so stupid, Harrington,” he mumbled, wiping his nose with the paper towel.

He startled when Eddie poked his head through the front door. 

“Kids are leaving. They said bye,” he said. “What can I do to help clean up?” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Steve said. “You can go.”

“You sure you don’t want me to stick around?” Eddie asked. 

“I’m fine,” Steve insisted.

“You should still have ice on that,” Eddie said.

“It’s too cold,” Steve said.

“Just a couple more minutes, Steve,” Eddie said. 

“I’m going to let them thaw a few more minutes and then I’ll put them back on.”

“Okay,” Eddie said.

“You can go,” Steve said again. Please just leave me alone to wallow in my misery .

“Okay,” Eddie said, making to go but hesitating. “We’re okay, right, Stevie?”

“Of course. We’re great, Eds,” Steve said. I just have this weird thing where I’m a little bit in love with you. That’s all.

“I’ll call you later to see how you are,” Eddie said, looking unconvinced.

“I’ll be waiting by the phone with bated breath,” Steve said teasingly, trying to inject some of their usual levity into their conversation. 

Eddie nodded and then disappeared from the doorway.

He sighed a breath of relief now that he was well and truly alone. He knew that he couldn’t live in the unreality of infatuation, the one where he could imagine that just maybe Eddie liked him back, forever but he hadn’t expected it to come crashing down around him so soon. He had to do something, and soon, or this would quickly become unbearable. Something like moving to a different country and changing his name or joining the circus.

Or… He winced as his mind fell on the most realistic option. It was time to bite the fucking bullet. He had to talk to Robin.

Chapter Text

Steve spent the first half of his shift trying to find a way to broach the topic of Eddie with Robin. The store was absolutely dead and they had already gone through all of the returns and organized everything there was to be organized. There didn’t seem to be a way to bring it up organically between discussions of which candy they should borrow from the candy display that evening and arguing over what movie to put on the TV behind the counter. On top of that, the conversation was dwindling like it always did when they reached the middle of the day, and that just meant he ended up spending a lot of time staring at Robin like he was about to speak and saying nothing. After about two hours, Robin called him out on it.
“You’ve been extra quiet today. And creepy,” Robin said from where she was lounging against the counter. 

“No more quiet or creepy than usual,” Steve shrugged, spinning a quarter on the counter. 

“Steve, you literally never shut up,” Robin said. “Talking is the one thing you’re good at. And you are, like, particularly stare-y today.” 

“Gee, Rob, thanks,” Steve said. 

The quarter fell. He put it back up on its edge and spun it again. 

Robin sighed. 

“Something’s up with you. I know you better than anyone. You can’t fool me,”  she said, watching the quarter. “I’m worried, Steve.” 

“God, between you and Dustin — I’m fine. I swear,” Steve insisted. Just fucking say it, Steve. Say you aren’t, say you’re miserable, just fucking tell her.

“Well. If you weren’t fine. You could talk to me about it,” Robin said, carefully. “If you wanted to.” 

“I know that,” Steve said.

“Well, if we aren’t going to talk about it…” Robin said.

“Nothing to talk about,” Steve said.

“Right, if we aren’t going to talk about the nothing that’s bothering you, here. Mom gave me these this morning,” Robin said, pulling her bag out from behind the counter and rummaging through it. She retrieved a couple of photos that Mrs. Buckley had paperclipped together. She slid them across the counter to Steve. 

“They’re awful,” Robin said as Steve picked them up. 

The prom photos were not great, but they weren’t terrible. All three of them had the fakest smiles he had ever seen plastered across their faces, and Steve and Eddie looked incredibly stupid in their street clothes next to Robin in her prom dress. He put the first photo down and looked at the next one, the one in front of the mantle. He remembered the way that Eddie’s hand had rested on his shoulder, could almost feel the ghost of that touch as he stared at the photo in his hands. There it was: an opportunity. A picture of Eddie in his hands, the memory of Eddie’s touch on his back, and he still couldn’t bring it up to Robin.

He didn’t know why he couldn’t bring himself to say it. He wasn’t even nervous about telling her who he liked. It was more that it was so hard to admit that, for the first time in his life, he was unsure about the only other aspect of life he was usually so confident in. It was different than feeling like he couldn’t date because of the Upside Down thing. It was more like he didn’t know where to begin. Besides, he was pretty fucking certain that Eddie had no interest whatsoever. He was finally starting to see why Robin was so hesitant about Vickie. 

He had always known what to do when he had a crush, back when his life was simple. He knew when to touch someone, when to make a joke, when to go in for a kiss. Eddie turned all of that on its head. And he wasn’t going to get past any of that if he didn’t say something.

He glanced up to find Robin watching him, waiting for his reaction.. 

“They’re alright,” he said finally.

“They’re alright? You’re not going to tease me? Say I look constipated? Say your hair looks terrible? Say Eddie looks like he’s being tortured? Something really is wrong with you, Steve,” Robin said. “Please tell me. Please ?” 

“It’s nothing, I just,” Steve made a noise of frustration. The words came tumbling out of his mouth so quickly he was surprised Robin understood him. “It’sjustthatIlikesomeone.” 

“Is that all?” Robin said with a sigh of relief. 

Steve nodded.

“Who? Is it that girl that was following you around the store like a puppy dog earlier this week? Jacqueline something?” Robin asked, perking up. 

“Who? No,” Steve said, shaking his head. He only vaguely remembered interacting with that girl, he was so deep in his Eddie crush-fog. 

“Is it Nancy?” Robin asked, her face twisting with concern. “Is that why you’re so out of it?” 

“No, Rob, it’s not Nancy.”

He wasn’t sure why he couldn’t get his mouth to shape the words it’s Eddie.

“Well, you haven’t talked to any other girls recently, so who the hell else could it be?” 

Steve bit his thumbnail nervously, grimacing. 

“Shit, Steve, don’t say me ,” Robin groaned. 

“Ew, Robin, not you,” Steve huffed. 

“Don’t say ew!” Robin said, smacking his shoulder. “Come on, just tell me. I’m clearly not going to guess.”

“I — It’s…,” Steve trailed off, staring at the photo in his hand. He put it down on the counter in front of Robin and pointed at Eddie. 

Robin’s eyes widened. She looked at the photo, then at Steve, then back to the photo. 

“ Him ?” she asked, picking up the photo and holding it directly in front of Steve’s face, tapping the space where Eddie stood. “Eddie? Eddie Munson?”

“I believe he is the only other person in the photo beside you and me, and we’ve already established it’s not you,” Steve said.

“Oh. My. God,” Robin said.

“Don’t freak.”

“I knew it, I knew it, I knew it,” Robin said, poking Steve in the chest repeatedly as she spoke. “I knew you two were knocking boots.” 

“We are not knocking boots,” Steve said, his cheeks coloring. “Wait, why did you think that?” 

“You guys are obsessed with each other.”

“Eddie’s not obsessed with me,” Steve said. “Eddie doesn’t even know. He wouldn’t want to know. It would ruin everything.”

“Eddie wouldn’t want — Steve, you are so dumb. You are the dumbest man in all of Hawkins, no, the world , do you know that?” Robin said. “The one thing I have been sure of since the day you jumped out of that boat and into Lover’s Lake was that Eddie is completely and totally in love with you. You should have seen the way he looked at you. The second you took your shirt off, he had little hearts floating around his head like a cartoon. It was so damned obvious. You were the one I wasn’t quite sure about. I mean I suspected, but you’ve been so hard to read.”

Steve gaped at Robin. 

“He is not in love with me,” he insisted. 

“Have you seen the way he is around you?” Robin asked, leaning across the counter so their noses were a hair’s breadth away from each other. 

“What are you doing?” Steve asked. 

“Hiya Stevie, baby, sweetheart, princess, hot stuff, love of my life. But, soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Stevie is the sun. Hey Harrington, could our mouths be any closer?” Robin said, in what was honestly a pretty good imitation of Eddie. 

“He is not that heavy-handed,” Steve argued. 

“No, you’re right. I was toning it down. He’s worse than that,” Robin said.

“He’s like that with everyone,” Steve said.

“He’s a little flirty with everyone, sure, but he acts like he’s literally trying to climb inside of you and live there,” Robin said. “AND. He doesn’t make everyone a mixtape, and you’re the only person he’s dedicated a love song to in front of God and everyone. For fuck’s sake, you really are a dingus.” 

“It wasn’t a love song,” Steve grumbled.

“ WE COULD BE TOGETHER ?” Robin yelled. “Sounds like a fucking love song to me, Steve. Sounds like a fucking hint.”

“Well,” Steve stuttered. He supposed it did. If he thought about it. “Yeah, I guess.”

“He’s probably at home blasting ‘Hopelessly Devoted To You’ and clutching your photo to his chest right now,” Robin said. “How did you think any of that was friendly ?”

“I don’t know. He’s Eddie. I thought he was going around giving everyone mixtapes and flowers and-“

“Pause,” Robin said, holding up her hand. “Flowers? He gave you FLOWERS?”

“Stop yelling, Jesus Christ. He didn’t go out and buy me a bouquet or anything. He found a boutonniere in the parking lot after we dropped you off for prom,” Steve said.

“And… he gave it to you?”

“Yeah, he pinned it on my jacket,” Steve said, blushing. “It was, uh, the moment I realized I liked him, I think.” 

“He pinned it to your — STEVE.”

“Do you have trouble modulating the volume of your voice?” Steve hissed. 

“I’m sorry, it’s just you are so —“ Robin grabbed Steve’s face with both her hands and shook him. “The poor kid couldn’t make it any more obvious. Flowers, Harrington!”

“Flower. Singular. That he found on the dirty ground,” Steve corrected.

“Shut up. Would you give one of your platonic guy friends a flower you found on the ground?” Robin asked, releasing his face.

“You’re my only platonic friend that’s not fourteen, Rob,” Steve said.

“Okay, if you had any, would you?” 

“No.”

“And how about a mixtape? Would you give one of your buddies a mixtape?” 

“I guess if it wasn’t, like, predominantly love songs, sure,” Steve said. 

“Riiiight… How many songs on the tape Eddie gave you are love songs?”

“Um. Most of them.”

“Are you sure it’s not all of them?”

“One of them is kinda like. Um. Dirty, maybe? Or at least kinda slightly raunchy. I’m not really sure, the lyrics are weird.”
“Slightly raunchy? What song is that?”

“Tattooed Love Boys,” Steve said. “So I don’t really know what that’s about.”

“You don’t really know what that’s about. Do you think that perhaps Eddie, who need I remind you has several tattoos, put a song raunchy song with ‘tattoo’ in the title to encourage you to think about him in raunchy ways?” Robin asked. 

“Maybe it’s a coincidence,” Steve said.

“Sure. And there’s no reason Eddie would make you a mixtape full of love songs,” Robin said.“Except, consider this, could it possibly be that he is trying to tell you, that, I dunno, he’s IN LOVE WITH YOU?”

“How can you be so sure? We don’t even know if he likes… you know. Boys,” Steve said. 

“It hasn’t come up, so I don’t know if he likes boys, plural. But I am positive that he likes one boy, and that’s you ,” Robin said, patting his cheek. 

“What do I do?” 

“Have you tried flirting back?” Robin asked, rolling her eyes. 

“Of course, I’ve tried flirting back. But, well. The last time he was at my house, we were playing a game in the pool with the kids and he winked at me —“

“Which is a very common thing to do to your friend you’re not in love with,” Robin interjected. 

Steve waved her off. 

“And I got distracted and my hand slipped so Dustin fell off my shoulders into the water and he kicked me in the face,” Steve said. “And it wasn’t that bad, clearly, since it didn’t bruise, but my nose was bleeding, like, everywhere so he took me into the kitchen and helped me clean up—“

“Nursing you back to health, right, not a romantic thing to do at all,” Robin said.

“Can you let me talk?” Steve said, exasperated. 

“Sorry,” Robin smiled sheepishly and mimed zipping her lips. 

“Thank you,” Steve said. “Anyway, he said he was sorry and he was just messing around.”

“Yeah, Steve, he felt bad. He should have known better than to flirt with you when you were horsing around. He didn’t mean he was messing around all the time,” Robin said.

“You really think so?” 

“Yeah, I really think so. He’s got it bad,” Robin nodded. “I mean, he wears your clothes, Steve. All the time. He’s been wearing your jeans the last three times I’ve seen him.”

“Really? I mean, that doesn’t mean anything. Maybe he just likes the jeans,” Steve said. 

“How often do you see Eddie in a light wash, Steve? Bet you anything he wears them because they’re yours,” Robin said.

“Are you serious? That feels like a major reach.” 

“As a heart attack. Why? Does that make you feel hot under the collar?”

“ No,” Steve protested, even though it definitely made him something.

“I’ve never seen you like this,” Robin said.

“If he’s got it bad, I’ve got it worse,” Steve chuckled humorlessly. He ran a hand across his face. “He’s, uh… Shit, he’s really fucking cute. And funny. And smart. I mean he really doesn’t apply himself but he’s so smart.”

“Stevie’s got a crush,” Robin sang.

“Shut up.”

“You loooooooove him. You think he’s cuuuuuute.” 

“Listen, I opened up to you, don’t be an asshole,” Steve said, hitting her shoulder. 

“Eddie and Steve, sitting in a tree, k-i-s-s-i-n-g,” Robin continued.

“Not productive, Rob,” Steve said, covering her mouth with his hand.

She licked his palm. 

“Robin! Are you twelve?” He asked, wiping his hand on his vest.

“Oh, give me a break,” she said. “You teased me about Tammy.”

“Yeah, because she’s Tammy. Eddie is…”

“What? The president of the Dungeons and Dragons club? Who paints little figurines in his free time? The only guy who can out-geek Dustin Henderson? The only guy with better hair and tighter jeans than you?” Robin asked. 

“All of those things are cool . Kind of. And he doesn’t have better hair than me,” Steve said. 

Robin raised a critical eyebrow at him.

“Tammy sounds like a muppet,” he said, pulling out his last and only defense.

“First of all, I am over Tammy, so you’re point is moot. Second of all, you teased me for months, so let me have my moment,” Robin said, bouncing giddily on the spot. 

“We still haven’t figured out what I am supposed to do,” Steve said, sighing. 

“I am completely the wrong person to ask. I’m usually the one asking you, remember?” Robin said. “What would you do if you knew it would be received well?” 

“I would ask him to dinner or the movies, or I would have kissed him the first time the idea popped into my mind,” Steve said. 

“You could still ask him to dinner or a movie. You’ve gone to both with him before,” Robin shrugged. 

“Yeah, but he won’t know this time is supposed to be different unless I make that clear,” Steve groaned. 

“So you plan to hang out like normal, feel out the situation, and then if it seems like doing something romantic would go over well, you do it. What’s the worst thing that could happen?” Robin asked. 

“Uh, I lose one of my best friends,” Steve said. 

“Steve, I don’t think Eddie would drop you over something like that,” Robin said.

“What would you have done if I had just come out and kissed you instead of telling you I liked you?” Steve countered. 

“I probably would have freaked,” Robin conceded. “But I would have gotten over it and we would have pushed past it. I wouldn’t have dropped you as a friend.” 

“But you still would have freaked,” Steve said.

“Okay, so don’t go straight in for a kiss. Maybe you just wait for a moment and tell him, like you did with me,” Robin said. “Because if I swung your way, that little speech would have worked. Just so you know. It was good.”

“So what, I just say ‘Hey, Eddie, just so you know I’m –” 

Steve was interrupted by the bell tinkling over the door and none other than Eddie Munson himself walked through the door. 

In an act of sheer panic, Steve ducked down behind the counter. 

“Hey, Eddie,” Robin said casually, kicking Steve’s shin. 

“What are you doing?” she whispered between clenched teeth.

“Hey, Buckley. I swore I saw Steve when I was walking up. Was I hallucinating?” 

Steve took that as his cue to pop back up from behind the counter, plastering a plastic smile across his face. 

“Oh, there you are,” Eddie said, puzzled. “What were you doing down there?”

“Dropped my name tag,” Steve said sunnily, patting the plastic nameplate on his vest. 

‘Right,” Robin said, quickly. “These things fall off all the time. Super annoying.”

“Yeah, sounds like it,” Eddie agreed. The photos on the counter caught his eye. He picked one up. “Oh, these are not good.” 

“They’re awful,” Robin agreed. “Steve likes them.”

“Well, we all know Harrington has terrible taste. Did you get copies for me?” Eddie asked.

“Yep,” Robin said, fishing in her purse and pulling out a second set of paperclipped photos. She held them out to Eddie. “Feel free to burn them. The fewer copies of those we have in the world, the better.”

“Burn them? Hell no. These are the only tangible evidence I have that proves Steve Harrington and Robin Buckley have deigned to accept me as a friend,” Eddie said, tucking the photos into his back pocket. 

“Of course, we’re your friends, Eds. When are you going to stop saying shit like that?” Steve said, still standing rather stiffly behind the counter. He was trying not to think of all the things he had pinned to his corkboard for exactly the same reason – to preserve the physical evidence that Eddie cared about him.

“When it stops being surprising,” Eddie shrugged. He directed his attention to Robin. “Is it in yet?” 

“Is what in yet?” Steve asked, looking between Robin and Eddie.

“ Time Bandits ,” Eddie said.

“What’s that?”

“I don’t know how you don’t strangle this guy every single shift,” Eddie said to Robin. 

“Trust me, it gets more difficult with each passing day,” Robin said. “I think I checked it back in this morning. Steve, why don’t you and Eddie go check?”

“I don’t even know what section it’s in,” Steve said. 

“Fantasy,” Robin said.

“You’ll find it faster –”

“No, Steve, I think you should go,” Robin said, widening her eyes at him. She was trying to tell him something, he was sure of it, but Steve had no idea what.

“Guys, guys. I can find it myself. Jesus,” Eddie said, laughing awkwardly. He headed towards the fantasy section.

Robin waited until Eddie was across the store then turned her attention back to Steve. 

“You go over there and ask if you can watch that stupid fucking movie with him right now, you big idiot,” Robin hissed. 

“Oh. OH. Right. Good idea,” Steve nodded. “It’s not going to work, because he’s not in love with me, but good idea.”

“Yes, he is. Go, go, go, go,” Robin pushed him out from behind the counter. 

Eddie was crouching in the fantasy section when Steve found him.

“Is it there?” he asked, wiping his sweaty palms on his jeans.

“Yep,” Eddie said, holding up a VHS.

“What’s it about?” 

“It’s hard to explain. But it’s really cool,” Eddie said. “Some of the guys from Monty Python made it.” 

“Monty Python, right, you’ve mentioned them,” Steve said. 

“So you do listen when I babble,” Eddie said.

“Always,” Steve said. He glanced back at Robin, who gave him two thumbs up from the counter.

 “Could I, um, watch it with you?”

“You want to watch this with me ?” Eddie said, standing up.

“Yeah. Unless you already have plans to watch it with someone else, then forget I said anything, I just thought that maybe we could –,” Steve rambled. 

“Stevie,” Eddie said, smiling with bemusement. “I would love to watch it with you.”

“Oh. Cool.”

“Your TV is bigger than mine anyway,” Eddie said.

“So you’re using me for my TV?” Steve asked, feigning offense.

“Would you rather me use you for something else?” Eddie said, waggling his eyebrows.

Steve, smooth as always, responded by making a series of unintelligible noises. 

Eddie laughed and began his way towards the front desk. Robin began ringing him up as Steve hovered awkwardly off to the side.

“How’s tomorrow night work for you?” Eddie asked. 

“That works,” Steve replied.

“Cool. Seven?”

“Sure.”

Robin handed him a receipt.

“Rob, I didn’t pay,” Eddie said.

“I put it on Steve’s account,” Robin said, quickly adding, “He told me to.”

“No- ow!”

Robin kicked Steve’s foot behind the counter.

“He told me not to tell you. Oops,” Robin said.

“Oh, well thank you, Stevie,” Eddie smiled at him again. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Yeah, see you tomorrow,” Steve said. 

“Bye, Buckley,” Eddie said, throwing a wave over his shoulder as he left.

“Yes!” Robin said, pumping both her fists in the air. “Yes, yes, yes! We did it!”

“We? What did you do?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, did my moral support mean nothing to you? And what about putting the video on your tab?” Robin asked. “My wingmanning was essential to your success.”

“Rob, it’s just a movie night,” Steve said.

“Yeah, but it’s a beginning,” Robin said.

“Yeah, the beginning of the end,” Steve said, watching Eddie’s van pull out of the parking lot through the store window.

“God, can you just trust me on this?” Robin said. “Now. Let’s come up with a game plan.”

Chapter Text

The doorbell rang exactly four minutes before seven. Steve paused to check his hair in the mirror that hung in the hallway, smoothing back a few stray pieces. 

“You got this, Harrington,” he whispered to his reflection. 

Although, he wasn’t entirely sure what this was and he was pretty sure he didn’t have it. Robin said it was an almost date, so he should behave as though he was almost dating Eddie. She had told him to pull the old stretch-and-put-an-arm-around-his-shoulder trick about halfway through the movie, but he wasn’t so sure that would work. To be honest, he wasn’t even sure he would survive until halfway through the movie. His heart was already in his throat, and he hadn’t even seen Eddie yet.

Eddie began knocking incessantly.

“You standing me up, Harrington?” Eddie called through the door. 

Steve smoothed down one last hair before he scurried down the hall, yanking open the front door. 

“Sorry, sorry, come in,” he said. 

“Took you long enough. I brought snacks,” Eddie said, dangling a pan of jiffy pop from his finger as he pushed past Steve. 

“Oh, thanks,” Steve said, but snacks were certainly the last thing on his mind. 

Eddie always looked good, that was becoming one of the facts of life for Steve. But today – today,  he looked downright obscene. He was wearing a Black Sabbath t-shirt, but that wasn’t the reason that Steve’s brain was currently dissolving into soup inside his skull. No, that was happening because Eddie had cut the sleeves off of this particular shirt, and it was at least two sizes too small. There was just over an inch of bare midriff exposed between the hem of Eddie’s shirt and the waistband of – lord have mercy, he was wearing Steve’s jeans again.

“Are you listening?” Eddie asked, snapping his fingers in front of Steve’s face.

“What?” Steve asked, his eyes dragging up Eddie’s torso, catching at the trail of hair just below his navel and then again at the curve of his neck before they reached the other boy’s face. There was a grin playing on Eddie’s lips.

“Enjoying yourself, Stevie?” Eddie asked. 

“Huh?” Steve asked. 

Good going, Harrington, Steve thought. You haven’t even started the movie and you’ve already lost the ability to speak.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Eddie laughed, putting a hand on his hip, hiking the hem of his shirt up just a few centimeters further. 

Steve licked his lips.

“I asked if you wanted to get this popping,” Eddie said, holding up the popcorn again.

“Oh, yeah, sure,” Steve said.

Eddie found his own way to the kitchen, Steve following closely behind him. Eddie handed the VHS to Steve, taking it upon himself to turn on one of the stove burners and get the Jiffy Pop set up. 

Steve leaned against the breakfast table, once again transfixed by the exposed sliver of Eddie’s midriff. His mouth went dry as his eyes traced the dimples on Eddie’s back that peeked out from beneath the hem of his shirt as he moved. A hot coil of want gathered in the pit of his stomach as he imagined running his tongue his fingers over those dimples.

“ What are you looking at?” Eddie asked when he turned to face Steve. 

Steve blinked up at him dumbly.

“My jeans?” Eddie asked.

“You mean my jeans,” Steve croaked.

“So they are,” Eddie said, looking down at himself. Much to Steve’s horror, he began unbuttoning his fly. “I mean, if it bothers you so much, you can have them back.” 

“No!” Steve cried. He cleared his throat. “No, it’s fine.” 

“Whatever you say, Harrington,” Eddie said, shaking his head as he buttoned his fly back up. 

They stood there in silence, Steve trying valiantly to keep himself from staring, as the popcorn began popping on the stove. It dawned on him that it would be the perfect time to try his hand at flirting. Robin had said he should take every opportunity he could get to flirt. 

Jesus, I can’t believe I am falling back on Robin’s romance advice, he thought. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.

He tried to think of something to say, some small thing he could tease Eddie about.

Shirt shrink in the wash, Munson?

Auditioning for White Snake later, Eds?

But when he opened his mouth to speak, he said, “I’ll get the movie set up in the den.”

“Yeah, you should probably check if it’s rewound. I heard the kids that run the video store are a couple of bozos,” Eddie said.

“Bozos that let you rent movies for free,” Steve said.

 “That just proves my point. Bad for business, bozo,” Eddie said. 

“Do you want to pay for your movies?” Steve asked.

“No,” Eddie said sheepishly. 

“Then shut it, Munson. Make sure the popcorn doesn’t burn,” Steve said, heading into the den. 

The VHS was rewound because he wasn’t a bozo and he did his fucking job. He turned on the TV and popped the VHS into the player, turning the volume down as the previews played. He arranged the boxes of candy he had borrowed from work, a box of Milk Duds for Eddie, and a box of Junior Mints for himself. 

Eddie wandered into the den with the popcorn just as the previews were coming to a close. 

“You ready to get your mind blown, Harrington?” Eddie asked, collapsing onto the couch. 

“Almost always,” Steve replied. He hesitated before he sat down on the couch. He knew if Robin were here, she would tell him to sit as close to Eddie as possible, but the coward in him decided it was best to leave some space between them. 

The movie began rather abruptly, the action starting almost immediately with a knight in shining armor riding a horse through the main kid’s room.

“Holy shit,” Steve said, under his breath. 

“Told you. Don’t worry, it’ll make sense soon,” Eddie said, smiling at Steve. 

He was sure that it would probably already make more sense than it did if Steve wasn’t so focused on the six inches of space that lay between Eddie and himself on the couch. Somehow, the fact that they weren’t touching was almost more distracting than it would have been if they had been pressed up against each other. 

“Got you candy,” Steve said, motioning to the coffee table as he watched the kid get abducted and taken back in time by a band of thieves. 

“Shh, quiet,” Eddie chastised, annoyed until his eyes landed on the box of Milk Duds. “My favorite! You remembered.” 

“I thought we were being quiet,” Steve said. 

“Milk Dud?” Eddie asked, ignoring him.

“They’ll pull out my fillings,” Steve said.

“Live a little, Harrington,” Eddie said, holding the box out to him. “You have insurance.”

Steve rolled his eyes, taking a singular Milk Dud from the box and putting it in his mouth, sucking on it like a hard candy.

When he turned back to the screen, there was a man and a woman in medieval garb being tied to a tree. 

“I missed something,” Steve said.

“Not really. They’re just hopping through time and stealing shit,” Eddie said. 

Steve was completely and utterly lost. All he knew was that the guy was complaining about a “problem” coming back.

“I thought this was a kid’s movie,” Steve said.

“Do you know what the problem is?” Eddie asked.

“Yes, Eddie,” Steve said.

“It’s a boner,” Eddie said, smiling as he put a cigarette between his lips and lit it.

“I gathered that.”

“Just making sure you’re following along,” Eddie shrugged.

“Thank you ever so much, Eddie,” Steve sighed.

The movie was weird. Really weird. He supposed he would like it if he wasn’t so focused on every movement Eddie made out of the corner of his eye. Currently, he was enraptured by Eddie’s hand moving in lazy circles against his stomach, drawing Steve’s eyes back to that exposed strip of skin over and over again. When Eddie caught him looking, he tried to play it cool. 

“You’re hogging the popcorn,” Steve said. 

Eddie put the bowl in the expanse of couch between them. 

When he looked back at the screen, there was a man covered in plastic wrap.

“Why is he covered in Saran Wrap?” Steve asked. 

“Best not to ask those questions,” Eddie said.

“Got it.” 

Steve was trying desperately to parse out what was happening in the movie as he reached blindly for the popcorn. His fingers grazed across metal and then skin. His breath hitched as he realized Eddie’s hand was under his. His first instinct was to pull his hand away, but then Eddie would think that something as simple as their hands touching freaked him out. He felt around the bowl, bumping Eddie’s hand a few more times before he found a single kernel of popcorn. The bowl was nearly empty. 

He glanced at Eddie and found him staring intently at the screen, the corner of his mouth tipped up in amusement, which may have had nothing to do with him, but at least it wasn’t abject horror or disgust. 

When he turned his own gaze back to the screen.

“Is that James Bond?” Steve asked.

“Of course, the one person you recognize is Sean Connery,” Eddie said.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“I don’t know, he just looks like the type of person you would remember,” Eddie said, finishing off the popcorn. 

Steve didn’t know what that meant, but whatever it was seemed to delight Eddie endlessly. 

Steve dropped the subject, busying himself by moving the bowl back onto the floor, leaving the space between them overwhelmingly empty once again. 

That was until Eddie shifted in his seat to get more comfortable, his hand falling into that void, reducing the distance between himself and Steve to a mere three inches. Steve waited a few minutes before readjusting himself, letting his own hand fall into that space, leaving less than an inch between their pinkies. 

Any hope of Steve paying attention to the movie was dashed. There was no way he could think about anything other than the electricity (real or imagined) that he felt radiating off of Eddie’s hand. 

He was startled out of his intense concentration when Eddie took in a sharp breath.

“You okay?” Steve asked.

“Just cold,” Eddie said.

“Yeah? Maybe it’s because you’re only wearing half a shirt,” Steve said, reaching over to tug on Eddie’s hem. 

“Fuck off,” Eddie laughed, swatting his hand away.

“You want a sweatshirt?” Steve asked.
“That would be great,” Eddie said. 

Steve got up to pause the movie. He stopped when he realized Eddie was getting up, too.

“What are you doing?”

“Coming with you?” Eddie said.

“Why?”

“I wanna see where the magic happens.”

“You want to snoop,” Steve said. “I’m on to you.”

“So what if I do? You’ve snooped in my room,” Eddie said.

Steve made for the stairs, Eddie trailing behind him.

“Well, mine isn’t half as interesting as yours,” Steve said. “Yours  is like some kind of modern art exhibit.”

“I’m sure it’s interesting, Stevie. It’s yours,” Eddie said as Steve opened his bedroom door. 

Eddie poked around his room while Steve rummaged through his dresser for a suitable sweatshirt.

“Here you go,” he said, turning back to Eddie.

He found Eddie standing in front of his bed, staring at the corkboard. At Steve’s almost shrine of things he had given him.

“You kept it,” Eddie said quietly. 

“Kept what?” Steve asked, his heart in his throat. 

“The flower, dumbass,” Eddie said, his voice soft despite the insult, and nodded towards the wall. 

“Oh, that,” Steve said, unable to find any other words.

“Why?” Eddie asked, turning to look at Steve. 

There was more space between them than Eddie’s tactile nature usually allowed for, but something about the way Eddie was looking at him with such unabashed, heartbreaking awe made Steve feel as though they had never been closer, made him feel as though the room was dissolving around them until it was just the two of them and that flower floating in the ether. Steve knew the affection he saw in Eddie’s eyes could be friendly, knew that Eddie wasn’t used to even the most platonic expressions of fondness, but it was enough to make Steve want to respond with the same level of genuineness. 

He swallowed around the truth where it lay heavy on his tongue and found it didn’t taste so bad. So he said, “Because you gave it to me.” 

“Oh,” Eddie smiled, worrying his lower lip between his teeth. 

Kiss him. Kiss him. Kiss him.

Steve felt bile rising at the back of his throat. He knew that he was staring at Eddie’s lips, knew that it was so obvious, but he couldn’t help himself. It would be so easy to close the space between them, to pull Eddie into his arms right then and there and have the answer to all the questions that had been plaguing him for the last few weeks. But he couldn’t make himself move because he couldn’t stop imaging Eddie pulling away, his face, which had been so sweet and open moments before, marred with disgust as he said “What the fuck do you think you’re doing, Harrington?” And no matter how badly he wanted to kiss Eddie, the possibility of that look on his face turning sour was too terrifying to risk. 

But then Eddie was reaching stepping closer, reaching for him, he was –

“Thanks, Harrington,” Eddie said, his fingers grazing Steve’s as he took the sweatshirt from him. 

Steve released a breath he didn’t know he was holding. 

“Yeah, no problem,” he said. 

His eyes widened as Eddie went to put on the sweatshirt. He hurried out of his room before he was assaulted by near-lethal amounts of bare torso that came into view as Eddie lifted his arms to pull the sweatshirt over his head.

“Meet you downstairs,” he called over his shoulder. 

He was already waiting by the VHS player, ready to press the play button when Eddie reentered the den. 

“Hey, speed racer,” Eddie said. “I am pretty sure you left a cloud of dust in the shape of your body when you left.”

“Just really into the movie,” Steve said tightly.

“Really? Remind me, where did we leave off?” Eddie asked.

We left off with your hand about two centimeters away from touching mine and I can’t remember much else.

“Um. They were… Well, they… uh, there was an invisible wall, maybe?” Steve stammered.

“Yeah, Stevie, sounds like you are really into the movie,” Eddie said. “Don’t worry, I know this movie must be a lot for your tiny mind to absorb.”

“Sit down, asshole,” Steve said, punching the play button. 

“I don’t have a tiny mind,” he mumbled as he settled back into the couch, a little closer to Eddie than before but still a few inches of space between them. 

Steve tried his best to focus on the screen, but he could feel Eddie fidgeting next to him. He glanced over at the other boy to find him with the cuff of his sleeve pressed against his nose.

“Are you sniffing my clothes?” Steve asked, his stomach doing a nervous flip.

“ No ,” Eddie said, looking every bit like a dog caught stealing table scraps. He folded his hands in his lap, safely away from his nose.
“Pretty sure I saw you do it, Eds,” Steve said.

“Pretty sure you’re seeing things,” Eddie retorted. 

“I definitely know what I saw,” Steve said.

“Shut! Up!” Eddie said through clenched teeth, reaching over to dig his fingers into Steve’s ribs.

“You’re treading dangerous waters, Munson,” Steve said, trying to wiggle away from Eddie’s hand, all the while trying to tickle Eddie back.

“Just cuz you’re the reigning champion when it comes to tickling,” Eddie said, grabbing Steve’s wrist and holding his arm hostage as he continued his attack with the other hand, “Doesn’t mean it will stay that way.”
“I beg to differ,” Steve said, twisting artfully out of Eddie’s grasp.

Their struggle continued until they had come to a standstill. Eddie was at a slight disadvantage, pinned on his back with Steve’s knees bracketing his waist, but he made up for it by holding both of Steve’s wrists in a vice grip and effectively preventing him from claiming his victory.

In the background, the movie went to credits, completely forgotten by both boys. 

“Give up yet?” Eddie asked, squeezing Steve’s wrists.

“You don’t really think you’re gonna get me to fold, do you, Munson?” Steve asked.

“I think you will,” Eddie said, pulling Steve forward by his wrists. 

“You wish,” Steve laughed. 

He didn’t realize just how close their faces were until Eddie joined him in his laughter, his breath puffing against Steve’s face. Eddie seemed to notice, too, because he tensed under Steve, his laughter dying out, his grip on Steve’s wrists loosening ever so slightly. 

Steve held his breath, his skin prickling as Eddie’s gaze raked over his face.

“Something’s gotta give, Stevie,” Eddie whispered.

And there it was, another opportunity, right in front of him, or under him, rather. Eddie’s eyes were searching his face, waiting, so clearly waiting – in anticipation or dread Steve wasn’t sure. Steve took a deep breath, leaning forward imperceptibly, freezing with a mere three inches left to go, and… And he couldn’t do it. He couldn’t close the gap when he saw Eddie’s eyes widen, and felt his body tense even more. 

“Alright, you win, Eds,” he said, his voice wavering as he stood up. 

Eddie’s hands fell away from him and Steve tried his best not to read the sigh that left the other boy’s lips as one of relief. 

“I should go,” Eddie said, running a hand over his face.

“You sure? You can hang out if you want,” Steve said.

“Yeah, I should really get going,” Eddie said. Eddie motioned to the sweatshirt he was wearing. “Mind if I wear this home?” 

“I’m never going to get it back am I?” Steve asked. 

“Definitely not,” Eddie said, gathering up his candy and keys.

“Then I suppose it’s a sacrifice I am willing to make,” Steve said.

He followed Eddie to the front door. 

“I’ll take care of returning the video for you,” Steve said, opening the door for Eddie.

“Thanks, man,” Eddie said. “Well, see you.”

“See you, Eds. Get home safe,” Steve said. 

“Darn. I was planning on driving very recklessly until you said that,” Eddie teased, starting down the walkway. 

“Nobody likes a smartass,” Steve said, leaning against the doorjamb. 

“ You do.”

“Yeah, I guess I do.”

Eddie paused, turning back to look at him.

“Steve?”

“Yeah?”

Eddie studied him intently, the muscles in his jaw working as though he was preparing to speak, but he shook his head, apparently having thought better of it.

“Thanks for having me over,” Eddie said.

“Any time,” Steve replied. 

He watched in the doorway until Eddie was in the driveway, closing the door quietly. He walked over to the front window, glancing out to make sure Eddie got into his van okay. 

He watched as Eddie crossed the street to get to where he parked, kicking a pebble on the way. Eddie stopped in the middle of the street, looking back at the house. Steve ducked to the side of the window, out of sight but still watching Eddie. Eddie scrunched up his face in apparent frustration as he hit himself on the forehead with the heel of his hand, his lips moving as he muttered something to himself. Steve watched on in anxious puzzlement until the other boy made it into the car. 

“Well,” he said, turning back to the empty house. “You fucking blew it, Harrington.” 

***

Steve rolled over for what felt like the thousandth time in the last hour since he had gone to bed. He wanted desperately to go to sleep, but every time he closed his eyes, all he could see was Eddie, and all he could think about was all of the times he should have said something or done something earlier that night and hadn’t. 

Something’s gotta give, Stevie.

He stared at the clock on his bedside table, watching the minutes slip by. 3:12… 3:13… 3:14…

He groaned, kicking the blankets to the end of the bed. He hauled himself up, stumbling around his room aimlessly as he looked for something, anything, to do. He remembered the pack of cigarettes he had abandoned in the TV room and trudged downstairs to retrieve them. They were on the coffee table, next to the ashtray overflowing with the butts from his Benson and Hedges (fancy rich boy cigarettes, Eddie called them) and Eddie’s Camels. He knew that it was going to be a long night when the sight of their intermingled trash was enough to make his heart skip a beat. He lit another cigarette before taking the ashtray to the trash can outside to rid the room of all evidence that Eddie had been there. 

He came back inside and was about to flop down on the couch when he noticed a piece of fabric sticking out from between the cushions. 

He pinched the fabric between his thumb and forefinger, pulling it out slowly. The familiar pattern of white skulls against a black background revealed itself as he tugged. 

Eddie’s bandana. 

Steve shook his head in confusion, unsure of how Eddie had even managed to get it there. He had been sitting all the way on the other end of the couch. 

“Dammit, Eddie,” Steve mumbled to himself, cigarette clenched between his teeth as he held the handkerchief out in front of him. 

His immediate thought was that he should call Eddie and tell him he’d forgotten it. But it was nearly half past three in the morning and Eddie had gone home hours ago. He was almost certainly asleep by now. 

It did occur to him that he could just give it back to Eddie the next time he saw him, which would no doubt be soon. But a part of him wished he could see Eddie again right away. He wanted to see him and say all the things he hadn’t been brave enough to say earlier that night. He tucked the handkerchief into the waistband of his shorts and tapped off the entire inch of ash that had accumulated at the end of his cigarette. 

“You can’t show up at his house at three in the morning. That’s psychotic,” he said to himself. 

Except — except maybe he could. Something Eddie had said a few weeks ago rang through his mind. 

You’re welcome over any time. Don’t even have to call first. Just show up. 

He was pretty sure Eddie hadn’t meant to show up in the middle of the night in a lovesick frenzy, but he didn’t say Steve couldn’t do that. 

Steve found himself dressed and in the car, nearly halfway to Eddie’s house, before he had given much more thought to what he was doing. 

“Eddie, I think you’re really great,” Steve practiced to the empty car. “No, idiot that – he won’t know what you mean .”

“Hey Eddie,” he began again. “You forgot this at my house and also, just thought you should know, you’re the first thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep and pretty much the only thing I think about in between. No, ew, that’s seriously creepy, Harrington.”

He pulled into the trailer park, parking behind Eddie’s van like he usually did. 

Steve gave himself a onceover in the rearview mirror. He looked fine. Not great, but not bad for pushing four in the morning. Besides, Eddie knew what he looked like. How he looked tonight wouldn’t make or break whether or not Eddie liked the way he looked. 

“Eddie,” he said to himself in the mirror. “I like you. A lot.” 

He leaned back in his seat with a groan. 

“God, you’re so lame,” he told his reflection. 

Fuck it . He’d figure it out as he went along, but so help him, he would say something . 

Steve got out of the car, closing the door quietly. Wayne’s truck was there, which meant it was his night off and he likely wouldn’t appreciate being woken up, so Steve made his way around back to Eddie’s window. 

The window was dark, as it should be at this time of night. Steve took a deep breath and stood on tiptoe, tapping his fingers lightly against Eddie’s windowpane. 

After thirty seconds with no answer, he tried again with more force.

The curtain twitched, followed shortly by a light turning on inside.

The window squeaked in its track as Eddie pushed it open. 

“You scared the shit out of me, Steve,” Eddie hissed through the screen. 

“You forgot this,” Steve said, pulling the bandana from his pocket and holding it up for Eddie to see. 

“Man, what time is it? You came all the way over here in the middle of the night?” 

“You said I could come over any time,” Steve shrugged. 

“So you’re here at asscrack in the morning to return my bandana?” Eddie said. 

Steve opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out.

Eddie stared at him with bewilderment. 

Steve let the hand holding the bandana fall. 

“Yeah. And I, um. I guess I just wanted to see you,” he stammered. 

“You just saw me, Stevie,” Eddie said, his expression softening ever so slightly. 

“I know that but –” He cleared his throat. “I guess I wanted to see you again.”

“Really?” Eddie said, studying him through the window. 

Steve nodded. 

A slow smile spread across Eddie’s face. 

“Come around to the door. Be quiet. Wayne’s sleeping,” Eddie said. 

Eddie met him at the front door, sleep-tousled and wearing nothing but a pair of threadbare pajama pants slung low around his hips. 

“Hey,” Steve breathed, his eyes fixed on a scar that disappeared into Eddie’s waistband. He wondered how anyone could be so beautiful all the god damned time. 

Eddie shushed him, dragging him inside by the arm. 

“Can’t keep yourself away, can you?” Eddie teased after he’d closed his bedroom door behind them.

“Looks that way,” Steve said, realizing too late that his tone was perhaps a little too earnest. Not that that mattered, really, when he was planning on ruining everything by telling Eddie anyway.

Eddie stilled, eying Steve carefully. 

“Everything okay, Stevie?” he asked. “Did you have a nightmare or something?”

“No, no nothing like that,” Steve said, standing stiffly in the center of Eddie’s room. “Like I said. I just wanted to see you. And give this back.”

Steve held out the bandana. Eddie looked at the piece of fabric, his brow furrowing as he took it from Steve.

“That all?” Eddie asked.

Something’s gotta give, Stevie.

“Well. I – uh – I wanted to tell you something, actually,” Steve said.

“Alright,” Eddie said, watching Steve expectantly.

‘You might want to sit down,” Steve said, motioning towards the bed.
“Okay, you’re wigging me out a little bit. Are the kids okay? Will? Dustin?” Eddie asked, paling as he sat down on his bed. 

“No, they’re fine. I wanted to tell you –” Steve trailed off, clearing his throat. “Maybe I should sit down, too.” 

He sat down next to Eddie, fixing his gaze on the other boy’s hand where it rest on the mattress. 

“Did something happen?” Eddie asked, reaching out to Steve, his fingers grazing Steve’s wrist. He spoke again, more quietly. “Did I do something?” 

Steve closed his eyes at Eddie’s touch, trying to regulate his breathing.

“No.”

Eddie waited patiently for Steve to speak, his fingers still a ghost of a touch around Steve’s wrist.

“Well, kind of,” Steve said. “You are so – Everything about you is just – What I mean is you’re my favorite person.”

It wasn’t what he wanted to say, but it was the best Steve could manage.

“Aw, shucks,” Eddie said, with only a hint of his usual playfulness. “You’re mine, too. I thought you knew that. That’s why you needed to see me so badly at this ungodly hour?” 

Steve opened his eyes to find Eddie smiling at him with all the warmth and affection Steve had come to expect from him. 

“No. It’s more than that,” Steve said.

“More than being your favorite person?” 

Steve nodded, swallowing.

“Well, aren’t I lucky?” Eddie quipped, bumping his bare shoulder against Steve’s clothed one.

“You probably won’t think so once you know what it is,” Steve said.

“Why don’t you tell me what it is and let me decide, huh?” Eddie asked, squeezing Steve’s wrist. 

“I –” he faltered, meeting Eddie’s gaze again. “I can’t stop thinking about you, Eddie.”

“ Me ?” Eddie asked, wide-eyed, his voice cracking. 

Steve nodded in the affirmative. 

“What about me ?” 

“Do you really want to know?” 

“Yeah,” Eddie whispered. 

Steve tried to sift through all of the thoughts in his head for something, anything, to say.

“I think about how you have no concept of personal space,” Steve blurted. 

Eddie flinched at that, pulling his hand away from Steve’s wrist, but Steve caught his hand, holding it between both of his own.

“And how much I love that about you. Hell, sometimes I only get you riled up so you’ll lean in all close like you do and call me a jackass.”

Eddie stared at him like he had grown a second head. Steve felt like he should stop talking but now that he had started, he didn’t think he could. 

“I think about your smile. About how much I love it, and if you’re smiling because of me, because of something I did or said, I feel like I’m the king of the world. I think about how much I love when you get shy, when you hide behind your hair, and god , I love your hair. And your eyes, Jesus, Eddie, has anyone ever told you you have the most beautiful eyes?” 

“Stevie,” Eddie breathed in disbelief.

“And today. Today I’ve been thinking about that shirt you wore. I couldn’t stop thinking about it if my life depended on it, Eds. You looked like – I don’t even know. Like a poster I would tear out of a magazine and hide under my mattress,” Steve continued, speaking more quickly now, worried he was running out of time, out of breath. “But it’s more than that. More than what you look like, I mean. Most of the time, I think about how I want to spend every waking moment with you. About how I want to listen to you talk all day, about anything at all. Music, movies, even Dungeons and fucking Dragons. I think about how I like you more than anyone I’ve ever met and how I would give anything just for you to like me half as much. And I think about how scared I am that everything will change now that you know that.”

Eddie started at him, blinking.

“That’s about it,” Steve said, nervously.

“I have to say, that’s the last thing I expected to hear out of you. And of course, everything will change, Stevie,” Eddie said after what felt like an eternity of silence.

Steve winced, fixing his gaze on the floor. 

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

He shouldn’t have come, he shouldn’t have said anything, he should have known better. Coming here and hoping that Eddie would have reacted any different was some sort of sleep-deprived delusion. 

“I’m sorry,” Steve whispered. 

“Hey. Don’t be sorry,” Eddie said. “I said things would change. I didn’t say it wouldn’t be okay.”

“How could anything be okay?” 

“Because,” Eddie said, tipping Steve’s chin up with his forefinger.

“Because what ?”

“Jesus Christ, you are a jackass,” Eddie said, smiling fondly as he leaned in closer. “But so am I. Because I should have done something weeks ago. I thought I was being risky wearing that shirt, but here you are with your late-night grand gestures. You one-upped me, Harrington.”

“You mean you… You… You, too?” Steve stuttered.

“No, I go traipsing around everywhere in half a shirt – of course, me too. Because while you’re thinking all of those incredibly sweet things, I’m thinking about how badly I wish you would look at me. And I thought you were looking at me tonight, not just looking but looking like I want you to, but you never did anything about it so I thought I was imagining it,” Eddie said.

“You definitely weren’t,” Steve said, the knot in his stomach unraveling. “I couldn’t tell you the plot of that movie if you had a gun to my head, but I could go into heavy detail about you in that shirt.” 

“How about on the couch? I thought you were going to kiss me. Did I imagine that?” Eddie asked, his eyes dipping to Steve’s mouth.

“I wanted to. I’ve wanted to kiss you since I came to see you play,” Steve admitted. 

“I knew it! I knew you had a thing for rockstars, Harrington,” Eddie said, smiling wolfishly.

“I have a thing for a rockstar. Singular,” Steve said. “That’s the first time anyone’s ever dedicated anything to me.”

“It won’t be the last. Hell, stick around a while and I’ll write a whole album for you.” 

“So, um. If you thought I wanted to kiss you, why didn’t you just, you know? Kiss me?” Steve asked, his eyes darting between Eddie’s eyes and his lips.

“Because I was scared, Stevie. I still am. You scare the shit out of me,” Eddie said.

“I do?” 

“Yeah. I mean, you were waxing poetic about my eyes, but have you ever looked in the mirror? You’re a walking wet dream, Harrington. Seriously. And my hair? Jesus Christ, what about yours? I mean, how do you do it? You must spend more time on your hair than I do, and I fucking diffuse mine. And you’d do just fine looking the way you look, but then you have to go and be smart and funny, too. How is that fair?” Eddie rambled. 

Although Eddie had basically said as much, it didn’t dawn on Steve until that very moment: Eddie was nervous. Maybe even more nervous than he was. And funnily enough, that was exactly what Steve needed to find his courage. Eddie was in distress and he could fix that – perhaps he couldn’t mother-hen it away, this wasn’t really the right situation for that, but he could fix it.

“Eddie, be quiet,” Steve said, putting a finger to Eddie’s lips. 

“Yeah, that would probably be for the best, wouldn’t it?” Eddie said, the movement of his lips against Steve’s skin sending a shiver down Steve’s spine.

“It’s just that, you know, I’ve imagined this moment so many times and I might be dreaming, because why would you show up in the middle of the night like this? That doesn’t hap-”

“Eddie,” Steve cut the other boy off, taking his finger from Eddie’s lips and trailing it down his jawline, bringing his hand to rest at the nape of his neck. “You’re not dreaming.”

“Prove it, Harrington.”

Steve smiled softly as he closed the space between them, his lips barely brushing against Eddie’s. Eddie’s free hand grasped at the front of Steve’s shirt, encouraging him forward without pulling. Eddie was heartbreakingly timid in his movements, restrained, not wanting to take any more than Steve was willing to give.

Steve brought a hand up to Eddie’s cheek, silently reminding him that it was okay, that he wanted this, by pressing his lips more firmly against Eddie’s. Eddie’s breath hitched, his lips parting, his breath came out in hot bursts against Steve’s mouth. Steve took the opportunity to deepen the kiss, his tongue slipping between Eddie’s lips, earning a desperate whimper from the other boy. The sound was so achingly sweet, so much better than Steve could have imagined, that he had to break the kiss, pulling in shaky breaths as he buried his face in the crook of Eddie’s neck. 

“Maybe we’re both dreaming. Have you considered that yet? Or maybe you’re possessed and not acting of your own volition. Will got possessed once, right? That’s a thing that happens?” Eddie whispered, his voice quavering. 

Steve nipped at his neck.

“Hey, ow,” Eddie giggled, wrapping his arms around Steve.

“I’ll keep at it until you accept that this isn’t a dream and no one’s possessed,” Steve said. 

“In that case, keep going, I’m really not sure still - “ Eddie cut himself off with a hiss as Steve bit down again, harder this time.

Steve pressed a kiss to the spot before pulling back to smile at Eddie.

“I like you. So much,” Steve whispered, relishing the way Eddie’s cheeks colored at his words. He brushed his fingers against one of the pink spots that had risen on Eddie’s face. “You really are, you know.”

“Really are what?”

“Beautiful,” Steve said.

“You have to get your eyes checked.”

“You don’t believe me?” Steve asked, tracing the lines of Eddie’s face with his index finger as he spoke.

“No one’s ever called me that before,” Eddie said quietly.

“You are the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen, Eddie,” Steve said. “You’re perfect.”

“Hardly.”

“You are to me,” Steve said. 

He traced Eddie’s upper lip lightly. 

“You have a perfect mouth,” Steve said. “And a perfect nose.”

“Stevie,” Eddie protested, rolling his eyes.

Steve ran his finger along Eddie’s cheekbone.

“And perfect cheeks,” Steve added. “And I’ve already told you about your eyes.”

“You’re crazy.”

“Yeah. About you,” Steve said.

Eddie laughed quietly.

“God help all the girls you’ve put the moves on before. I don’t know how they survived,” Eddie said.

“I do. I never talked to them like this.”

“Why not?”

“Because I never wanted to say shit like this, Eds. I like you so much, it’s like the feeling is too big for my body to hold. I feel like my chest is going to burst when I look at you,” Steve said. 

Eddie pulled Steve towards him, capturing his mouth in a searing kiss. 

“You’re a menace, Harrington,” Eddie whispered against his lips. 

“You like it,” he replied.

“I fucking love it,” Eddie said, lying back on the bed and pulling Steve down on top of him. Eddie stifled a yawn as he looked up at Steve.

“Am I boring you, Munson?” Steve said, smiling down at him.

“Never. But you did decide to come here and confess your raging boner for me at four in the morning,” Eddie pointed out, yawning again.

 “I don’t remember confessing anything about that,” Steve said.

“You didn’t. Everything you said was sickeningly sweet and romantic, which is what tipped me off. The only reason you would have said all that is because you are trying to get in my pants, Harrington,” Eddie teased.

“Oh, yeah, sure,” Steve said, leaning down to press a quick kiss to Eddie’s cheek. “It wouldn’t have anything to do with the fact that I have feelings for you.”

“Yeah. Feelings in your nether regions,” Eddie said, turning his head to catch Steve’s lips with his own.

“Ed die ,” Steve complained, pulling away from him. “You know that’s not why I came here tonight, right?”

“I’m just kidding with you. I know you came here tonight to confess your big old crush on me. And your raging boner.”

“Remind me what I see in you?” Steve asked.

“I believe you said I am funny and charming and dashingly handsome and you can’t live without me,” Eddie said.

“I said that?”

“Mhm,” Eddie said, stifling yet another yawn.

“Do you want me to go home and we can continue where we left off tomorrow, sleepyhead?” Steve asked, brushing Eddie’s hair back from his face.

“You’re crazy if you think I am going to let you leave,” Eddie said. “You could sleep here. If you want.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Steve didn’t need to be asked twice. He stood up, pulling off his shirt and jeans quickly. He felt l rather self-conscious standing at the edge of Eddie’s bed in just his underwear. 

“I’d offer you some jammies but I’m enjoying the view too much,” Eddie said, watching Steve from where he lay. 

“Perv,” Steve said, blushing. 

“You don’t even know the half of it. Get the light and come to bed, Stevie,” Eddie said, patting the empty space on the mattress next to him. 

Steve switched off the light. He forwent the empty space on the bed in favor of crawling directly on top of Eddie again, burying his face in Eddie’s shoulder.

They lay like that for a while, not talking. Eddie carded his fingers through Steve’s hair, the repetitive motion lulling Steve into a half-sleep. 

“I forgot the bandana on purpose.”

“What?” Steve said, lifting up his head to look at Eddie.

“Forgot it on purpose. So you’d call me tomorrow and tell me and I’d have to come over again,” Eddie said.

“How’d that plan work out for you?” Steve asked.

“Better than expected,” Eddie said, grinning at him.

Steve laughed, nuzzling back into Eddie’s shoulder. 

Eddie resumed playing with his hair. Steve was pretty sure he could die happy right there.

“Goodnight, baby,” Eddie said quietly. 

“Say that again,” Steve mumbled.

“What?” 

“Call me that again.”

“Baby? I call you that all the time,” Eddie said, wrapping his arms around Steve’s waist and squeezing.

“Yeah, but it’s better now that you mean it.”

“Baby,  I always meant it. 

Chapter Text

Steve drummed his fingers idly on the steering wheel. Hellfire was running late. Again. 

The sun had just been setting when Steve had pulled into the school parking lot, and it had been at least twenty minutes since it had disappeared below the horizon.

Steve didn’t mind. 

It was a nice night, nice enough to have the windows rolled down as he waited. The end of spring and the beginning of summer bled together on the balmy evening breeze that blew through the cab. Steve sighed contentedly as he watched the guitar pick that hung from a ball chain wrapped around his rearview mirror sway in the gentle wind. 

He smiled to himself. It was funny how quickly little pieces of Eddie had found their way into his life after that first night. Eddie was an invasive species, just like the honeysuckle that was beginning to bloom in his backyard.

In his car alone, there was the guitar pick on the rearview and a few more picks in his cup holder. Steve wasn’t quite sure how they got there, but they seemed to be multiplying exponentially as time went on. He often held one in his hand while he drove, twiddling it between his fingers at stoplights. There was a stack of Eddie’s tapes, some he made and some he bought, in the middle console. In his room at home, Eddie’s clothes mingled with his own in the laundry basket. Eddie had added his own paper scoreboard to Steve’s corkboard, one side marked I like you, and the other side marked I like you a LOT . Eddie added tallies based on a point system that only made sense to him, but I like you a LOT was winning by a landslide. Steve had to clear out a section of one his shelves for the records Eddie brought over for him to “borrow”, but he only ever added to that stack and never removed. 

His own things had found their way into Eddie’s space, too, though not through his own doing. Eddie was something of a magpie. Steve’s sweaters were disappearing at a rapid pace. With summer quickly approaching and the nights getting warmer, he wasn’t quite sure why Eddie had been stealing them. That was, until, he walked into Eddie’s room one night and seen one pulled over Eddie’s pillow like a pillowcase. Eddie had flushed and stuffed the pillow under the covers when he saw Steve looking at it quizically. “Smells like you,” he had mumbled before quickly directing Steve’s attention elsewhere. 

Steve was startled out of his reverie by the sound of heavy door closing.

He heard Dustin before he saw him walking out of the building. 

“Wait a second. Eddie. Where the hell is your van?” 

Steve adjusted the rearview mirror to point at the entrance of the school just in time to see Eddie shrug and point to Steve’s car.

“No way. I’m not getting in there. You said you were driving me home,” Dustin said.

“I said I would get you home. I never said I would be the one driving,” Eddie said. “What’s your problem, anyway?” 

“You know exactly what my problem is. You two are worse than Mike and El when they first figured out what kissing was,” Dustin said, dragging his feet as he started walking towards Steve’s car. 

Eddie broke out into a jog, disappearing from Steve’s rearview only to appear at his window a few seconds later.

“Hey you,” Eddie said with a grin. “You come here often?”

“Only every day,” Steve smiled up at him.

“What do you think about taking me home?” Eddie asked, maintaining the stranger ruse.

“Oh, I was planning on it,” Steve said.

Dustin made a loud gagging noise.

“I’m calling shotgun,” Dustin said, walking around to the passenger’s side.

“Touch that door and you’re dead, Henderson,” Eddie called, never taking his eyes off of Steve.

Dustin groaned but climbed into the backseat nonetheless.

“Get in before the kid loses it,” Steve said, shooing Eddie away from the door.

“Hi Steve,” Dustin grumbled. 

“Hi Dustin,” Steve said, smiling at him in the rearview. 

Eddie settled into the passenger seat, pulling his wallet out of his back pocket before he sat. He glanced around the parking lot for onlookers and found it empty.

“No,” Dustin said, his eyes widening. 

Dustin and Robin had teamed up to start a kiss jar when they decided Eddie and Steve (or Max and Lucas, fair was fair) needed some help keeping their hands off each other. Robin usually gave them a couple for free, but Dustin charged whoever instigated the kiss at the first offense. They used the funds to buy pizza for the party members. They usually had enough to do so every two or three weeks, so Steve figured they probably had a point. He also figured he didn’t care. 

Eddie leaned across the front seat to give Steve a quick kiss, opening his wallet as soon as he pulled away.

Something in the ID window of Eddie’s wallet caught Steve’s eye as Eddie pulled out a dollar. It was the picture from Robin’s prom night, the one in front of the mantel, but Eddie had folded it so just Steve’s face was visible through the little plastic ID portal. Steve looked away, grinning to himself as a warm, fuzzy feeling washed over him. 

“You’re an expensive habit, Harrington,” Eddie said, passing the dollar back to Dustin.

“You don’t have to kiss me,” Steve said. 

“Oh, yes I do,” Eddie replied.

“No, you don’t ,” Dustin interjected.

“You’re the one that wanted him to find someone,” Eddie pointed out as Steve started the car.

“Yeah, I didn’t mean you ,” Dustin said. “I was hoping he would find someone I didn’t know so I wouldn’t have to see him playing tonsil hockey all the time.”

“Come on. It’s not all the time,” Eddie said. “You’re happy for us.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Dustin said, doing a poor job of hiding a smile that betrayed that he was, in fact, happy for them. 

Steve pulled out onto the main road.

“I still don’t understand how this happened,” Dustin said, gesturing vaguely between Eddie and Steve from the backseat. 

“You and me both, kid,” Eddie said. Then, in a stage whisper, he added, “Don’t make him think about it too much. We don’t want him to realize he’s way out of my league and leave.” 

“I’m not out of your league, Eds,” Steve laughed, rolling his eyes. 

“Whatever you say, sweetheart,” Eddie said, before turning back to Dustin. “He definitely is.” 

“Eddie,” Dustin said cautiously, pulling himself forward to look into the frontseat. “Are you wearing a seatbelt ?” 

“Yeah. Major Buzzkill over here insists, and who am I to say no?” Eddie said.

“You used to say no all the time,” Dustin said.

“That was before he was the boss of me,” Eddie said.

“I am not the boss of you,” Steve said. “And forgive me for wanting you to be safe. Speaking of, Dustin, you put on yours.”

“Yeah, buckle up, buttercup,” Eddie said.

“You were supposed to be the fun one,” Dustin grumbled, clicking his belt into place.

“The fun what?” Eddie asked.

“The fun dad. He’s the “rules” dad and you’re the fun dad,” Dustin said.

“I don’t remember signing up to be anyone’s dad,” Eddie said.

“You didn’t have to sign up,” Dustin said. “You started acting like one once you started hanging around with him.”

“Told you you were domesticating me,” Eddie said to Steve.

“I guess that’s fine as long as you don’t go all country club on me,” Steve said. He pulled up in front of Dustin’s house. “Your stop, Henderson.”

“Thanks for the ride, Steve. Are you picking me up tomorrow? We have to talk about the party,” Dustin asked.

“What party?” Eddie asked.

“Dustin,” Steve hissed, turning back to glare at Dustin.

“Oops,” Dustin grimaced.

“What party, Harrington?” Eddie asked again.

“You have to promise you won’t tell Nancy and Robin,” Dustin said hurriedly.

“Okay, I promise, what party?” Eddie huffed.

“Jonathan, the kids, and I are organizing a surprise graduation party for you guys. It was Dustin’s idea,” Steve said. “And now it’s only a surprise for Nancy and Robin.” 

“I forgot!” Dustin said.

“Oh,” Eddie said, turning to look at Dustin fondly. “You’re a good kid, you know that?”

“Please don’t tell Nancy and Robin,” Dustin repeated.

“Jeez, I won’t . I was trying to have a moment with you, Henderson,” Eddie said, rolling his eyes.

“Just you and me on the ride home tomorrow, Steve. So there’s still some surprise,” Dustin said.

“Just me and you, Dustin. Promise,” Steve said.

“Okay, good,” Dustin said. “Goodnight.”

They watched Dustin disappear inside like they did every time they dropped him off. Steve pulled out into the street, letting his mental autopilot guide him towards Eddie’s. Which was good, because Eddie’s hand had found its way to his thigh and his brain had completely shut off. 

It was shocking to him, how every time Eddie touched him still seemed like a miracle, a wonderous moment to be savoured, catalogued and stowed in the back of his mind for the (increasingly short) stretches of time he had to go without seeing Eddie. Eddie’s thumb drew lazy arcs just above Steve’s denim clad knee, each pass serving to throw Steve deeper into his love-drunk stupor. It didn’t help that Eddie was softly singing along to the music filtering quietly out of the stereo. It was as if Eddie was trying to do everything in his power to get Steve to dissolve into an embarrassing puddle. Or pull over the car right that very second and kiss him senseless. Knowing Eddie, it was probably the latter, and Steve was going to make him wait.

By the time Steve pulled into the space behind Eddie’s van, Eddie’s unintentional teasing had lulled Steve into such an extreme state of mooniness that he would have agreed to almost anything.

Which was how he found himself listening to Eddie read aloud from The Fellowship of the Ring for the third night that week. Eddie was determined to get Steve through the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy before the summer was over. They usually only reserved one night a week for that particular homily to appease Eddie, but this week Eddie really been on a tear. They were almost done with Fellowship. 

Eddie had already been reading for about thirty minutes, and it was getting late. Steve had to be up somewhat early for work, and Eddie had to be up for school, but that hardly seemed to matter. Steve could think of very little that mattered more than laying there with his ear pressed against Eddie’s chest, listening to the low rumble of Eddie’s voice intertwine with his heartbeat as he read aloud. 

Steve listened intently, running his fingers absentmindedly over the ridges of the demobat scar at Eddie’s hip. 

“That’s distracting,” Eddie said, his voice raspy from reading for so long.

“What?” Steve asked, looking up at Eddie after the moment it took him to register that Eddie wasn’t  reading anymore.

Eddie stilled Steve’s hand with his own.

“You’re distracting me,” Eddie said.

“Sorry,” Steve said, without much feeling, skimming his hand over Eddie’s hip to wrap his arm around Eddie’s waist.

“You don’t sound very sorry,” Eddie said, setting the book down on the mattress and brushing Steve’s hair from his face.

“I’m so, so very sorry for distracting you, Eds,” Steve said, smiling up at him. “Better?” 

“Somehow, I believed it less the second time,” Eddie said, his hand moving to cup Steve’s face gently. “But I don’t think I mind. It’s not like you can help it.”

“Help what?”

“How maddeningly distracting you are.”

Steve pressed his cheek into Eddie’s palm. His heart felt fit to burst under Eddie’s fond gaze. Steve closed his eyes for a moment’s respite from the overwhelming wave of affection he felt when he looked at the other boy. 

“What are you thinking about?” Eddie whispered, pressing a kiss to Steve’s forehead.

The answer that bubbled up in Steve’s throat and threatened to burst from his lips scared him. I love you.

Steve shook his head without opening his eyes, scared to open his mouth. 

“Nothing?” Eddie asked. “Doesn’t seem like nothing.”

It was too soon. They had only been seeing each other for a few weeks,and had only really known each other for a few months. He couldn’t say it yet. But he knew it was true.
“Spill, Stevie. Secrets don’t make friends and friends don’t make secrets,” Eddie said.

Steve opened his eyes to scowl up at Eddie.

“Well, if we’re only friends, I’m definitely not telling you,” Steve said.

“You know what I mean,” Eddie said. 

“I know,” Steve said, letting his head drop back down to Eddie’s chest.

Eddie waited a beat for Steve to elaborate, but Steve kept quiet. 

“Alright then, keep your secrets,” Eddie said. “See if I care. It won’t keep me up all night or anything.”

Steve chuckled against Eddie’s shirt.

“I won’t lay here wondering what’s going on in that pretty little head of yours into the wee hours of the night,” Eddie continued, his voice taking on a melodramatic lilt.

Steve laughed again.

Steve could hear Eddie’s heartbeat pick up from where he lay against his chest. He was pretty sure his own heart was matching Eddie’s frantic pace.

“It won’t drive me to madness. Not even a little bit,” Eddie said, his fingers trailing up and down Steve’s spine. “So don’t even worry about it.”

Steve wanted to say it, felt the desire to say it growing with every quip Eddie threw his way, because he was acting so perfectly Eddie and it made Steve feel almost queasy with how much he loved him. He screwed his eyes shut and took a deep breath.

“Don’t worry about how I find not knowing torturous or how —“ 

“I love you,” Steve whispered, his voice barely audible.

Eddie fell silent, his hand stilling on Steve’s back.

“What?” 

Steve cleared his throat.

“I’m thinking about how I love you, Eddie,” he said again, his voice still hushed.

“Look at me,” Eddie said softly, gently nudging Steve. 

Steve opened his eyes, his cheeks burning. Eddie studied him, looking for what, Steve didn’t know. 

“Are you checking if I’m possessed?” Steve began, nervously, trying to break the tension. “Because you promised to stop doing that every time I express my feelings for y-“ 

“No, shush, I’m absorbing,” Eddie cut him off.

“Absorbing?”

“Yes. I’m trying to preserve this moment in my memory perfectly. It’s not every day that Steve Harrington tells you he loves you,” Eddie said.

“It can be every day,” Steve said quietly. “More than once a day, if you’re lucky.”

“Yeah?” Eddie asked. 

Steve nodded. 

“You’re always beating me to the punch, aren’t you?” Eddie asked. “I was working up the guts to say it to you. Have been for like a week. But you’re braver than me, I guess.”

“You make me want to be brave,” Steve said.

“Jesus, Steve,” Eddie said, his breath whooshing out as though he had been sucker punched. “You can’t just say stuff like that.”

“Why not?” 

“Because it might kill me, that’s why.”

“Have you ever considered that might be the desired outcome?” Steve teased, stretching up to press a kiss to Eddie’s jawline.

“What, you want to love me to death?” Eddie asked.

“Mhm,” Steve said, kissing him again. 

“Okay,” Eddie smiled down at him. “But I’m taking you with me.”