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Lucienne liked dependable things, static things, trustworthy things. Her shelves had a system. Her diaries and census books had one. But even she would readily admit that within the Dreaming itself, stability was a mark of stagnation. It was wrong for places to be connected too firmly to each other, for a path to always lead to the same place. During Dream's absence, buildings turned into ruins, but even the space between them was frail with a lack of possibilities.
No more.
It felt good to wander through the ever-changing land again—never to the point of disorientation, just to the point of surprise. Walking had recently become Lucienne's favourite pastime whenever the workload at the palace allowed her to step out for a bit.
Sometimes, she could see Gault, who had stepped out of her entire self not too long ago, soaring high in the sky.
It was on one of these walks without a register in hand or a destination in mind that she found herself on the edge of a cliff overlooking a valley. Tall pines were rustling in the wind. The sound almost drowned out the flapping of wings, but Lucienne had heard it, and turned just in time to see Gault landing on a patch of grass not too far from her. Even down here, she seemed to be in constant motion; the tips of her wings twitched.
"You really love flying," Lucienne said, putting her hands behind her back.
She could tell Gault hadn't noticed her standing in the shade of a tree by the way she startled, but when she looked over to Lucienne, she was already smiling.
"Yes," she said simply. "Have you ever flown? I've had many forms, but this is something else."
Lucienne glanced to the left of Gault's head. The sky looked faintly pink, like dawn or grapefruit juice.
"I have, in fact. I've once been a raven. But I don't think it ever made me as happy as you are." Gault was truly radiant, which made Lucienne oddly pleased. She tried to match her smile.
"Now it's the library for you, is that right?"
"It is."
“This is pretty far from it.”
"I like to take walks. For too long, the Dreaming was a confused ruin of itself, but these days, it's once again full of change. And joy."
They were already walking, Lucienne realised, having easily fallen in step with each other. The air began to smell of water, and sure enough, they passed a small lake. The vegetation had mellowed out, shrunk down from majestic trees into shrubbery, weeds, heavily-scented blue flowers.
Lucienne's shoes were already muddy, but so were Gault's bare feet. She didn't seem to mind. If anything, she looked like she enjoyed the squelchy sounds of their steps.
"Well," she said. "I can see the appeal of walking. Though I do prefer the sky these days."
"What about people's dreams?" Lucienne asked. "How is that going?"
Gault gave her another one of her grins. The pitch of her voice rose a bit in excitement. "Oh, I love it. I feel like a fairy. I've been a fairy a few dreams ago. I took someone on a trip around the world, gave some advice, then gently woke them up." Her expression became more thoughtful. "I do have to wonder if it hurts, when they wake up to a reality that's worse than their dream. Not everyone's life changes for the better like Jed's did. But, all the same… I feel better inspiring than I did frightening people. I stand by that."
"It's the other side of the coin, isn't it? Both are needed."
Something brushed against Lucienne's sleeve. She stopped to pick a handful of small orange fruit, which immediately stained her fingers and the edge of her cuff.
"Berries?" she offered.
They didn't need to eat, but it was one of life's simple pleasures, much like flying or reading. They didn't technically need to do anything at all. They were not Endless.
"Why not," Gault said, taking a few. Her fingers were warm. Lucienne watched her bite into the berries with relish.
The landscape dropped down, framing the path they made with stone walls cracked by wispy foliage. It looked like an ancient riverbed would look if the space existed for more than it took for them to walk through it. Gault barely touched the big rocks lining the ground, choosing to use her wings. She looked over at Lucienne who slowly climbed every one of them, and who was not dressed for the task. But this was the Dreaming: no ravine and no fall could hurt her here. Just Dream. Only ever Dream, like he had banished Gault.
She seemed so unbothered by the time she had spent in the darkness, thinking it was to last for millennia. Maybe Lucienne, though more loyal, held her grudges for longer.
"Thank you for speaking up for me," Gault said all of a sudden.
Lucienne adjusted her glasses and slowed down briefly. "How do you know about that?"
"Lord Dream told me. You've noticed that all of us were capable of change just as I did, didn't you?" Gault's wings fluttered, but her face was serious. She had been some distance ahead of Lucienne for a while, but she matched her pace once again, landing and walking shoulder to shoulder with her. She could have offered Lucienne a hand to help with climbing the rocks, but she didn't. Lucienne was glad she didn't have to decide whether she wanted to accept it or not.
"For a long time, I thought the only change that was going to take place here was more desolation and ruin."
Gault didn't look convinced, but she didn't contradict her. "Ruin is an opportunity," she said instead. "If Lord Dream was never captured, I would have never known that I wasn't who I wanted to be yet: I would simply continue to lay terror in the minds of dreamers. Would you?"
Lucienne thought on it, turning the actions she had taken during Dream's absence over in her mind. Gault was right in that Lucienne would have never known herself to be capable of managing the whole realm if things were always as they had been before. It's true that she did it all out of necessity, but she hadn't let go once Dream came back. She liked that she had grown into the vacant spaces. She didn't care about power, but she liked being involved—indispensable.
It was not something to be voiced. When Dream had returned, she felt nothing but relief and happiness. He was free, her books had words in them, and the land was thriving. This is what mattered.
"Perhaps," she said as something started to crunch under her shoes.
When she looked up, they were at a beach, and the sky over the sea was loud with the suggestion of seagulls.
"Seashells," Gault said, shuffling her feet through them with quiet delight. They were everywhere, as numerous as sand, making up piles and dunes, white, pink, spotted with brown specks, grey like the back of a shark.
Lucienne wondered about it. Gault knew the Dreaming well, she must have, and yet she seemed so pleased by all of its faces. Maybe the memory of the darkness did weigh on her after all.
They reached the edge of the water, gleaming playfully with the reflexes of bright white light. Gault wandered straight into it, letting the waves swallow her calves. Lucienne considered taking off her shoes, but hesitated. She wasn't quite sure why, or in what capacity she was here, with Gault, having walked so far.
"I need to go back to the palace soon," she said. It was not a lie, but she still felt like she was avoiding something by saying it right now. "You know," she added, "if Lord Dream was never captured, I probably wouldn't have taken this walk with you."
The gentle expression on Gault's face when she turned to face her suited her a lot. She really was a dream through and through now.
"Don't let me stop you. But I'd be glad to take more walks with you whenever you have time."
Ruin was an opportunity.
The markings on Gault's body glittered.
"As would I." Lucienne smiled and tilted her head in contemplation. "You're welcome to visit me in the library as well whenever you tire of flying. I think you would find people's stories an interesting read if you're set on inspiring them now. The good ones are no less honest than dreams, but less random. It's like dreaming while awake."
Gault's eyes flashed with curiosity, and Lucienne had already started on her mental list of books she could recommend to her, more and more titles coming to her mind, fantasy and nonfiction and most of all poetry, yes, even before Gault said: "I just might."
Then a shadow passed over her face, a doubt or realisation. "Will Lord Dream like me being there?"
Lucienne straightened.
"Oh, he's busy. Also, he has ceded some of his responsibilities to me. Make no mistake, Gault. It is me who invites you."
Her voice sounded too sharp and too dark even to her own ears, but the look Gault gave her was—intriguing. Lucienne liked it a lot.
Gault extended her hand over the water, and Lucienne bent a little to shake it.
"See you soon, then," Gault said, and gave Lucienne her last smile.
"See you soon."
Gault rose into the air with heavy beats of her wings, throwing blue and purple light onto Lucienne's face, spraying little drops of saltwater onto her head, her vest.
Once again, Lucienne watched her take pleasure in flying from a distance. When the sky changed, clouded and billowed out into a windy night over a desert, she started walking again.
She extended a juice-stained hand to grab the edge of a rock and stepped around it, straight into one of the rows of shelves in the library—T. S. Eliot, Usman Awang, aveek-63, Mickiewicz. It was exactly where she wanted to be.