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When Penelope was four years old she lost her entire family in the blink of an eye. She lost her father to the end of a bottle, when his liver and kidneys finally gave out. Her mother and three sisters… It was a story too tragic for a child that age to comprehend.
She was placed into the tender care of Lady Danbury, a widow who never had kids of her own. Lady Danbury had taken in her God Son, Simon Bassett, and having heard of her story she had taken it upon herself to care for Penelope too.
It was hard at first. Penelope was scared and confused. Lady Danbury was a lovely woman, if not a little exact. She tried her very best to make Penelope feel safe and cared for, but there was only so much that she could do on her own.
But thank heavens for one thing.
Her foster brothers. For the first few years it was Penelope and Simon, but a few years later they were joined by another God Son, Gareth. Luckily the two of them were the best brothers one could ask for. Simon being a protective older brother and Gareth being the fun and sweet younger brother. She could always turn to them when in need.
Penelope didn’t have many friends growing up, and she never really learned how to make new friends either. It all just seemed to happen if it was meant to be. There were Gareth and Simon, but also Genevieve and Marina. The only two people in Penelope’s class in elementary school that didn’t see her as an orphan, but as a playmate.
For a long time it was only the five of them, and to be honest they didn’t have need for anyone else. They could entertain each other with Penelope’s sharp mind and they played for hours following the script that she gave them. It was those years in the backyard playing together that made her aspire to become an author.
But life goes on and people grow. Simon left for boarding school and later university. Penelope went to an all girls school and Gareth followed Simon after four years. Then, three weeks after Penelope’s 18th birthday, the unthinkable happened.
Lady Danbury, or Agatha as the kids had called her, died from complications with breast cancer at the age of 62. It rocked their family to their core. Gareth was just seventeen and neither Penelope or the 20-year-old Simon were capable of handling this situation. After all, they were all just children themselves, orphaned yet again.
Simon ended up inheriting the Danbury house and most of the estate. Penelope and Gareth inherited a large sum as well, enough to sustain themselves for years to come. But nothing could replace the tough love that Agatha was known for.
The next fall Penelope started university, with a scholarship to boot. That is also where she met her truest friend and soulmate, Eloise Bridgerton. They were assigned as roommates for their first year. Penelope was studying English Literature and Eloise was studying Women's Studies and Philosophy. Their friendship was solidified over a pint of chocolate fudge ice cream and they were inseparable since then. Eloise was the first person she had told about her family after elementary school and it seemed that Eloise was more than happy to involve Penelope in her own family.
“Since my dumbass brother is always away, you can fill in. It feels empty when there’s not eight of us,” Eloise always mused when she forced Penelope to spend their first Christmas together. It soon became a tradition for Penelope to fill in for the adventurer brother who only ever seemed to visit the Bridgertons when Penelope was with her brothers at Danbury Estate.
After two years Eloise and Penelope moved in together at a flat near their university, since it was clear to them that they were meant to live together even after graduation. Penelope grew closer with all of Eloise's sisters and even with the brothers she had met. Only one puzzle piece was missing.
Colin Bridgerton.
His pictures were plastered along the walls of the Bridgerton House, as were pictures of the other siblings. Penelope thought that the boy in the older pictures was quite cute but the man in the newer pictures was absolutely gorgeous. She spent a lot of time gazing at his smiling face in the picture frames, wondering what he could be like. She also spent a lot of time harboring resentment for the man who had this amazing family, but spent ten months of the year anywhere but with them.
At least he had a choice to stay longer than two weeks at a time. Penelope couldn’t get even a minute with her sisters and she took every opportunity she could to see Gareth and Simon. To Penelope Colin was beautiful but also selfish.
It took his sister getting married for Colin and Penelope to finally meet and it was anything but a fairytale come true.
Penelope had introduced Simon and Daphne at her 21st birthday and the two seemed to simmer under the surface until they came together to form what Penelope and Eloise liked to call a “Sickeningly Sweet Coupling”. After three years of dating Simon had finally popped the question and the two were in a rush to hit the altar.
Two days before the long awaited Bassett-Bridgerton Wedding Penelope met Colin.
Penelope had just entered the large Bridgerton family room when she saw him for the first time. He was just as gorgeous as he was in all the photos, if not even more so.
“Pen! Meet our brother Colin,” Daphne shouted from across the room.
She made her way over to them, dodging some other distant relatives of the Bridgertons. It was yet another thing that made Penelope feel on edge. She didn’t have distant relatives, she only had her two brothers.
“Hello, I’ve heard a lot about you!” The tall man said with a grin gracing his lips. He extended a hand to Penelope in a polite manner.
She took his hand and shook it. “Same can be said about you,” she said monotonically. Daphne shot her a weird look but she quickly recovered.
“Penelope and Colin finally meet! It's only been what, six years?” Daphne counted and covered her mouth in shock. “I’ll leave you two to get acquainted, I think Simon needs me,” Daphne said apologetically after catching a glimpse of her soon-to-be-husband making eyes at her.
Colin rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. “So you’re Eloise's roommate, right?” He asked. The question grated Penelope to no end. So he wasn’t even sure that she was the person that had lived with his own sister for six whole years? Had he paid no mind to the last six years of photos from Christmases and birthdays?!
“Correct,” she said and looked around the room, trying to find the aforementioned miss. She didn’t want to be stuck having a conversation with this man who clearly wasn’t interested in his own family's business.
“What do you do?” Colin asked while sipping on a pint of beer. His genuine interest went unnoticed by Miss Featherington.
Penelope groaned internally when she couldn’t locate a friendly face. She was stuck with Mr. Worldwide. “I’m a writer,” she said simply.
“Oh cool, me too! What type of stuff do you write?” Colin asked, eyeing her. Some of the stuff that he had heard about her were starting to come back to him. His mother had even suggested that the two could make a good pair, given their common interests. He had to admit that she was even more beautiful than in photos, but she seemed to be standoffish to him.
“I write for a magazine. An advice column,” she said, looking up at the man. Big mistake, as she was hit with a pair of deep green eyes that seemed to suck her in.
“So people must find you helpful then huh… Any advice for me?” He asked, leaning on the wall of the family room that was decorated in intricate light blue and gold leafed wallpaper. Maybe opting for an in for her to do what she was a professional in could gain him some favor with her and she’d warm up to him.
Penelope swallowed and shook her head. “For a man who spends ten months out of a year anywhere but here?” She said, unable to hide her disdain.
Colin frowned and fixed his stance. “Do you have a problem with travel writers?” He was clearly wrong with his previous thoughts.
“I have a problem with people who take their family for granted,” Penelope recounted.
“Excuse me?” Colin put his drink down, clearly upset by what Penelope had said.
“I think I was quite clear,” Penelope said slowly.
Colin huffed and looked around, abashed. He had reached his boiling point. No one insinuated that he didn’t care for his own family!
“Well maybe you are the one with a problem, since you’ve spent six goddamn christmases with my family. Did your own family get tired of your unsolicited advice so you had to move to another family instead?” He sneered.
Penelope stood there silent and without making a movement for a moment. Nobody around them seemed to take notice of their conversation which she was eternally thankful for. Before Colin could even say anything else she opened her mouth to say her peace.
“Good night, Mr. Bridgerton,” she said and walked briskly out of the Bridgerton Family room, down the long hallway. She ignored Anthony and Benedict on the way who asked her where she was going. In less than 60 seconds, she was out of the house and in her car.
She drove for two minutes and parked at the side of the winding country road and laid her head against the steering wheel and let out the most painful sob she had ever let out since her early childhood. She broke into tears as she hit the steering wheel of her car, leading it to honk her horn. In a few minutes her sobs quieted down and she was left shaking like a leaf, holding onto herself and sinking into her carseat.
Anthony and Benedict had been talking about a surprise for their dear sister Daphne when they had noticed Penelope leaving the pre-wedding party in distress. It was quite out of character for her to completely ignore them so they went into the family room to see if something was going on there that could have upset the woman. They couldn’t see anything out of the ordinary, but they did see that their brother was also rather agitated.
“Colin, did something happen here? We saw Penelope leave just now,” Benedict asked while Anthony kept looking around for Eloise or Daphne.
“Good riddance,” Colin grunted and took a swig of his beer. As beautiful as she was, she wasn’t all that his family had advertised her as.
Anthony turned around and looked at his brother with his eyes as large as saucers. “Good riddance?” He asked in disbelief.
“The woman was an absolute pain. She treated me like I was some leper while I was trying to be nice to her and then to top it all off, she said that I took my family for granted!” Colin complained and missed the look that his brothers shared between themselves. “Quite rich coming from someone who spends all major holidays with my family instead of her own, I say.”
Anthony was turning red and Benedict hurriedly ushered the two of them out of the family room. He could sense that things were about to heat up and then some.
“Tell me you did not say anything like that to Miss Featherington,” Anthony said gruffly as they entered the hallway.
Colin couldn’t believe what he was witnessing. “Didn’t you hear what I just said? She was being astonishingly rude. I fail to see the kind and fun Penelope I’ve heard so much of,” Colin muttered.
“I’ll admit I’ve never seen Penelope act in the way you described, and as rude as that is I need you to tell me that you didn’t say anything about Miss Featheringtons family to her,” Anthony said and looked his brother straight in the eye.
Colin swallowed and took a step back. “I… I might have said that her own family must have grown tired of her unsolicited advice…”
Benedict groaned audibly and rubbed his temples. “No wonder she didn’t say anything as she left…” He mumbled and turned to Anthony. “What do we do? Do we tell Simon?”
Anthony shook his head. “Get Eloise,” he told Benedict who left immediately.
“What’s going on?” Colin asked, finally having the sense to get worried.
“What you said to Miss Featherington must have upset her very much. I do not know the whole story as she hasn’t said much, but Penelope is an orphan. Her whole family perished when she was four years old,” Anthony said and looked at his younger brother sadly.
“Oh my God,” Colin let out, looking truly terrified. His own annoyance quickly turned into dread.
“You didn’t know. I know you wouldn’t have said it if you had known. You couldn’t have known, it's not really something that comes up naturally,” Anthony tried to comfort him. He was still his brother and he could see the pain he was in over his error.
“I need to find her,” Colin said hurriedly. “I need to apologize immediately,” he said and pushed past Anthony.
“Colin!” Anthony yelled after him but Colin didn’t mind. He practically ran out the house.
He saw that one of the cars that had been parked in the yard earlier was no longer there. He prayed to God that Penelope hadn’t gone far. The road luckily led only one way for quite some time so he could probably catch up to her now if he hurried. He jumped on the back of his motorcycle and drove off in a rush.
He quickly came upon a parked car, with the headlights on and illuminating the road and its surroundings. He parked behind the car and approached it slowly, on the passenger side. He knocked on the window of the car, startling whoever was inside it.
The car window rolled down slowly and he peeked in. “Penelope?” Colin said softly.
“It’s you?” Penelope sniffed and started to roll the window back up but Colin reached his hand inside the car and opened the door. “What the hell?!” She screamed as he jumped in the car and closed the door.
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I just wanted to apologize for what I said,” Colin said and turned to Penelope. “There’s no excuse for what I said,” he continued but was cut off.
“Who told you? About my family,” Penelope cut in, wiping her eyes.
“Anthony…” Colin admitted. “But regardless, I shouldn’t have said anything.” He finally saw exactly how she looked, as his eyes adjusted to the darkness.
Penelope was a mess. Her eyes were puffy and she had clearly cried just moments earlier. It pained him greatly.
“You didn’t know,” Penelope admitted. “And I was out of line,” she said quietly, her voice wavering. As always, she had quickly come to realize her own faults as well.
“Still,” Colin said and reached for her small hand. “I am sorry,” he said.
Penelope nodded and sniffed. She knew that this man wasn’t malicious. She might not understand his life decisions but she could understand his outburst. She could accept his apology as well.
“I lost my father too… It’s why I don’t come back here that often. It’s too painful. The place brings up so many memories,” Colin said, like he could read her thoughts. “It’s not easy to see my family when all I can think about is that father is not here”
Penelope looked at Colin, who seemed to shrink into himself right before her eyes. He was being… Vulnerable?
“My father drunk himself stupid every day until he couldn’t any longer,” Penelope said quietly. “My mother couldn’t take it… Raising four girls alone. She…” Penelope looked out at the long road ahead. “She drove a car into ongoing traffic with my sisters and I with her… With her selfishness she took not only her life but the lives of Prudence, Philippa and Felicity. My sisters… And two other drivers,” she breathed out the last few words.
Colin stared at Penelope, his hand still holding hers. “It’s not your fault,” he said.
“I know,” Penelope said. “I was four, what could I have done to prevent it,” she said hollowly.
“No, I mean… It’s not your fault you survived when they didn’t,” Colin clarified.
Those words swelled inside Penelope’s entire body and she burst into tears.
Colin hushed her softly and unfastened her seatbelt before pulling her closer. He drew circles on her back as she sobbed into his shoulder.
“It’s okay…” he said as he listened to the woman in his arms cry. “It’s not your fault.”
They stayed in silence as Penelope cried and Colin kept rubbing her back, hushing her every now and then.
After a long while they pulled back from each other and Penelope and Colin looked at each other. “Thank you… For saying that,” Penelope said.
“It’s the truth. You have to forgive yourself,” he said and stroked her cheek with his thumb.
“In that case you have to do that too…” Penelope whispered.
“What do you mean?” Colin asked.
“It’s not your fault either. You don’t have to feel guilty for spending time with your family when your father can’t. It’s why you’re always away, right?” Penelope explained.
Colin blinked and after some seconds he let out a sound that was somewhere between a laugh and a cry. “You’re right…”
Penelope noticed that his eyes were starting to water so she leaned closer and cupped his cheeks. “It’s okay to miss him. It only means that there was something worth the pain of missing them in the first place…”
A few tears rolled down Colins cheeks and he nodded.
“You have a great family. I’m sure they miss you. I know they do. There’s only so much that I can do to fill your shoes,” Penelope said.
Colin laughed. “They are quite big shoes,” he earned a laugh from Penelope.
“So they are,” she agreed and pulled back.
Colin could finally pull back and remember what he had been feeling at the start of the evening. He had always thought that Penelope was pretty, from the photos he had seen of her. But seeing her in person was a whole nother thing. Before their awkward and rude interactions he had been quite attracted to her, as he still undeniably was.
Penelope was sweet. Just like his family had always told him. And it really seemed like they could understand each other.
“Do you want to go back to the wedding pre-party?” Colin asked, looking at the woman beside him.
“Not yet… I don’t want Daph to get worried when she sees our puffy red eyes,” Penelope said and glanced at her phone. “And I think we should wait until Eloise’s wrath subsides. She might kill you if we don’t give her time to calm down,” she mumbled with a soft smile on her lips.
Colin smiled softly as well. “My sister loves you. And so does the rest of my family,” he said and leaned back on the carseat.
“I love them too. I love how they have accepted my brothers as well…” Penelope admitted and snuggled into her seat.
“Wait… Isn’t my sister marrying your brother?” Colin asked and looked confused.
“We grew up together as foster siblings. We have another brother as well, Gareth. He’ll come to the wedding too. The bond we share might not be by blood, but it's built on love.” Penelope explained.
“That’s beautiful,” Colin said softly.
“We made the best out of a rotten situation… All thanks to Agatha,” Penelope said.
“I think I’ve heard of her… Simons God Mom. I’m sorry for your loss,” Colin said.
“She was a great parent. I’m lucky to have had her for fourteen years,” Penelope smiled sadly.
Colin nodded, understanding the feeling. After that their conversation seemed to flow quite naturally. From one topic to another, for what seemed like hours.
“I’ve heard that you are quite the charmer actually. A life of the party, or something…” Penelope said and eyed him from the drivers seat. She was clearly teasing him and it worked.
“That’s what they have chosen to tell you?” Colin laughed.
“Among other things,” Penelope said mysteriously. “I know you write a travel blog… I might have read some of it. Or all of it,” she said and tried to cover her blush.
“Oh really?” Colin cocked an eyebrow and smirked proudly. “Sounds like someone likes my frivolous travel stories…” He was now even more attracted to this woman, she could surprise him.
“Well no need to get all puffed up about it,” Penelope murmured.
“What advice column do you write for again?” Colin asked, half teasing - half seriously curious.
Penelope raised an eyebrow. “Surely someone has mentioned it to you? I write for Ask Lady Whistledown,” she said.
Colin smacked his thigh suddenly. “That’s you?! I’ve read your stuff from before the Ton Weekly! Since the OG LW blog days!” Suddenly all his previous cockiness washed away as he was met with one of his own idols.
Penelope laughed and shook her head. “You’re messing with me,” she said.
“No really! I even sent in a question but you never answered,” he insisted.
Penelope smirked and looked at the brown haired man. “Well maybe I can answer you now,” she offered.
Colins cheeks pinked up and he looked away from her face. “It was like five years ago…” He murmured.
“Humor me,” Penelope insisted.
Colin sighed and turned back to her, still avoiding eye contact. “How about you answer a more current question instead?”
Penelope leaned closer. “Okay, hit me,” she said.
“Do I have a chance with this girl I really got off on the wrong foot with, but she turned out to be not only gorgeous but also pretty amazing and smart?” He asked without hesitation.
Penelope smiled while her cheeks were covered with pink. “It depends… How long are you staying?”
Colin leaned closer. “Definitely long enough to make up for my mistake this evening…” He said. “And to show you what all the fuss is about,” he said, referring to what his family had told Penelope all these years.
Penelope bit her lip. She could feel his breath on her face. “You’ve got yourself a date, Mr. Bridgerton…” She said and finally closed the distance between them.