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Hisashi liked to think that he was a connoisseur of Quirks. He wasn't particularly picky when in a bind, but similar to how one of his own social standing would only dine at a three Michelin star restaurant rather than some rancid fast food eatery, he would much rather prefer to collect useful and interesting Quirks.
Only this time, he wasn't on the prowl for a Quirk to satiate his never-ending compulsion to indulge, as rare as that was, and yet the so-called chef still managed to screw up his order. Instead of getting a delicious plate of filet mignon he somehow ended up with five of the same value meal.
Which was a rather cruel way to refer to five wailing newborns but Hisashi was much too frustrated to care about that at the moment.
"I asked you to see into his future," he grit out, restraining himself from decimating the woman in front of him before he could get her to squeal out an answer as to why he was desperately clutching to all five babies- possible only as a courtesy to an arachnid Quirk he had stored away. "Not steal him from it."
"See into the– no, no, my Quirk pulls blood relations from alternate timelines," she waved her hands desperately, frightened and quickly losing all color in her face. "Bloodline Paths isn't the most useful Quirk outside of the 'baby industry,' you know? I- I assumed that was what you were here for..."
All Hisashi had wanted was to see the five most probable Quirks that his son, Izuku, would have. Inko was set to give birth very soon, her C-section appointment was tomorrow after all. Hisashi worried that his real Quirk, All for One, would rear its head five years down the line and so when he heard about a woman with a Quirk that involved blood relations and paths he quickly resolved to meet with her.
Plus, proper preparation prevents poor vaulting, if he ever needed to resort to that. Best to get a head start on fire-proofing, telekinesis reinforcing, what have you before it came into use.
But instead of having future information about Izuku, he had five more of him.
With his one free hand, the other five cradling the newborns, he impaled the woman with a sharp tendril before she could even plead for her life and let the body crumple to the floor when it receded.
What a mess, Hisashi pinched the bridge of his nose. Well, the babies weren't at fault and he certainly wasn't going to give them away; he wouldn't do that to any of his kin. Considering that they were all alternate versions of his on-the-way baby, he loved them as much as the one not yet born.
That didn't negate the fact that somehow he would have to come up with a perfectly logical explanation for his beautiful wife on where he acquired five more children.
Inko was going to kill him.
Hisashi had spent the entirety of the operation watching all of the medical professionals like a hawk. Were any of them to try and harm his wife or their son they wouldn't even get the chance. They, however, mostly ignored him and the surgery was successful.
"Oh, he's so beautiful," Inko had tears in her eyes as she caressed their newborn's head from where he lay against her chest. "Hisashi look at him, our Izuku."
Even though Hisashi had already spoiled for himself the wondrous visage that was their child, he couldn't stop his features from melting in adoration as he looked down upon his son. "He is the most handsome child that has ever existed."
Inko relished in the skin-on-skin contact with their son before one of the nurses came in to take him off to the nursery. Hisashi tensed up, both because he didn't want his son out of his sight at all and because of what he knew was going to happen next.
His wife looked so sad to have Izuku be taken away, but she didn't fight it. A soft smile stayed on her face as she relaxed while the doctors started to stitch her up out of sight behind the curtains. And then another baby was laid on her chest and she stiffened up, exuding confusion as she stared down at it. Her arm lay lax at her side so her anesthesiologist assisted her by picking it up and placing it on top of the 'newborn.'
"Hisashi?"
"Yes, my love?"
"Do you remember, when I joked that I wanted you to watch those doctors very carefully while they cut me up so that they wouldn't switch my baby out for another," Inko slowly turned her head to look at him, her smile strained. "Then surely you would know, whose baby this is, and why they just so happen to look exactly like Izuku?"
Hisashi knew he was fighting what was likely a losing battle, but he had the audacity to try anyway, "Darling, don't you remember that we were expecting multiple children?"
A sudden and growing pressure clamped down on his eyes, making him choke on his words.
Inko's Quirk was never the strongest, but that didn't make it any less deadly as she narrowed her eyes at him and asked in a barely restrained tone of voice, "Hisashi. Do you really believe I don't know how many babies I was carrying around for nine months in my womb?"
He choked out, “Of course not.”
"Explain." The pressure increased. "Now."
With no other choice, Hisashi spun a tale about how he had been accosted by some madman with a baby replicating Quirk—honestly, not that improbable knowing the unpredictability of Quirks—while Inko had been prepping for surgery. Not wanting to stress her out before it, the doctors and he planned on introducing her to the babies once Izuku had been delivered. This was mildly true considering that Hisashi had been using a hypnotism Quirk on them the entire time that he was in the room so they wouldn't question where the five identical children came from.
Inko looked as if she was in immense pain, to which Hisashi blamed that on the surgeons and not the predicament that he had ultimately caused himself.
"What are we going to do," she murmured, thankfully believing his lies. "We don't have the room for six babies, nor the supplies. What-"
"Don't worry, darling, I'll handle all expenses," he interrupted her worrying. "And I'm sure I can manage to get a raise from my boss to sustain us going forward."
She didn't look as though she believed him, but the last of the six babies were placed on her chest and she sighed, saying, "Ok, we can do this."
Giving her hand a squeeze, he reassured her, "Of course we do, and our boys will be very lucky to have you as a mother."
Inko gave him a grateful smile before glancing down at the alternate Izuku. "We didn't come up with any other names, did we?"
Neither of the two was one for surprises, so when the time came when Izuku's gender could be determined, Inko opted to know. From there, Hisashi let her have full reigns on picking the baby's name—to which Inko had her heart set on Izuku from the very start—as he was still coming around to the idea of being a father. But that meant they didn't deliberate any other possible names.
"Hisashi, I know it likely isn't fair to ask this of you, but could you name them?" she asked, a drowsy look on her face. "I'm just so exhausted and I fear that I may propose something rather silly in this state, and I would hate for them to despise me later in life because of that and–"
Kissing the top of her head to stop her self-conscious rambling in her tracks, Hisashi said, "Don't you worry about that, my dear. I can handle this."
"Thank you," she looked as if she wanted to kiss him back but couldn't move a muscle so he did what any good husband should and leaned down for her to have easy access.
Despite agreeing for the sake of his wife, Hisashi fumbled internally on how he should proceed. It had been so easy when Inko stated firmly that their son would be named Izuku, but now when the responsibility was up to him, well, that was a different thing entirely.
But there was no need to worry, as he looked at the baby Inko currently cradled against her chest, and spotted the small, almost hidden indents in its hands so similar to his own, Hisashi found that, yes, he would have no problem naming the rest of the Izuku's at all.
Raising six babies was hell and Hisashi was sure that wherever his brother's soul had gone to rest, Yoichi was one hundred percent laughing at his misfortune.
For Yoichi the Second certainly loved his father's misfortune- although the child didn't know he was the second anything.
Had Hisashi's mind been on the matter of naming the child that obviously inherited All for One Yoichi in honor—or was it in spite—of his dearest younger brother? Yes. And had that inspired him to mock the One for All holders by incorporating numbers into the rest of the children's names when he realized that Izuku contained the number nine? Also yes.
Izuku, Shichirou, Gorou, Mitsuya, Yoichi, and Rei. He let his original Izuku stay as the oldest on all records as he felt it was only fair.
Hisashi had a good laugh, and gave himself a pat on the back for his clever name ideas. But now clearly it was biting him in the ass as the babies—as much as he adored them—were living up to their namesakes in causing him to lose sleep. Three cried incessantly during the day and when Hisashi or Inko finally managed to put them to rest, the other three cried during the entire night. Hisashi took up much of the brunt work of changing, feeding, and rocking the babies to sleep as it really was his fault that there were six of them in the first place.
And if he thought caring for them when they were infants was hard, it only got more difficult once they became mobile and verbal.
"All Might! All Might!" the six hellions would chant whenever they passed by hero merch. The fact that it was the only thing they collectively loved, and one of the few things they could verbalize, Hisashi was resigned to buying whatever their eyes gazed upon.
Because the one and only time he had ever told them 'no' the wails they let out would have made the roar of a concert crowd turn into a hush in shock.
Hisashi's wallet cursed him for dropping hundreds of thousands of yen on that blasted blond eyesore.
Out of all the Izuku's, Rei was the most subdued. Cried the least, got along with his siblings the best and wanted little.
Shichirou and Gorou were as thick as thieves and grew prone to playing pranks. Such as the one time he took the two of them grocery shopping alongside Rei and Izuku, as both Mitsuya and Yoichi were at home with Inko. Some woman dared to speak to them while Hisashi had been distracted, commenting how cute the 'quadruplets' were.
The two had looked at each other, smiled, and then Gorou spoke, "Quadruplets? But I'm Gorou and he's Shichirou."
Her only response had been a horrified "Your poor mother."
But the most devious out of all of them was Yoichi, because of course he was. Hisashi had thought that he'd get a second attempt in life but was hit—quite literally—on the head by the boy's stubbornness which had been miraculously inherited from his brother, Yoichi the First.
His son frequently antagonized him, from escaping his playpen as a baby to staging a revolution with his brothers against Hisashi. He had absolutely no idea why the boy didn't like him quite as much as his siblings.
Hisashi had always suspected that he wouldn't get along well with another user of All for One. Such a shame that he was correct.
Although Yoichi did have a much weaker version of All for One, he could only take Quirks with, ugh, consent. Hisashi didn't know if it was an actual part of his Quirk or if the boy was just obstinate.
As for the other Izuku's, their Quirks were not only interesting but also ironically fitting given their names. He always suspected that his and Inko's Quirks would create interesting combinations and his sons proved as much.
Rei appeared to have an Erasure Quirk of some sort, he suspected that he was actually pulling the Quirks out of the holder's bodies, although he could only do it for four seconds. Yoichi, of course, had All for One. Mitsuya had Object Attraction like his mother, although much stronger and it seemed as though he could use it to pull himself towards objects as well. Gorou had Fire Breath, but his fire was peculiarly green. And Shichirou, well, he had a Glide Quirk, so while it resembled that horrible Shimura woman, he couldn't stay suspended in the air nor could he fly.
While the whole baby duplication ordeal had been caused by his need to know the possible Quirk of his son, he was almost disappointed to find out that Izuku bore none. Disappointed but not surprised considering his genetics.
His siblings- duplicates really but at this point, the difference hardly mattered- were quick to console him after the doctor's visit.
"Quirks are overrated!" Shichirou told him, with Gorou nodding his head rapidly.
Yoichi quickly latched onto the sentiment and said, "Plus, if you ever want to borrow our Quirks, you can just ask me! Right, guys?"
"Right!" Mitsuya cheered.
Rei, ever so quiet, turned to Hisashi and said, "Daddy can help too." While it was usually true, unfortunately, Hisashi had already come to the conclusion that it would be better off if Izuku stayed Quirkless. What with his dreams, so much louder than the others, of becoming a dreadful hero.
Izuku smiled at his brother's attempts to cheer him up, but his sadness carried over in the years. Plus, his brothers couldn't stop all of the bullying he faced.
Which was why Hisashi should have suspected that the nine in Izuku wasn't just for show when the boy eventually fell into the lap of One for All.