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traditionally, the early seams of an infatuation falls flat on its feet as a pair becomes comfortable with the concept of the other being theirs, and therefore no longer feeling the need to impress or appreciate one’s lover beyond a certain point of time. this is how it has always been, mika was told and recited by a multitude of elder orphans whence he was a tousled boy, listening to their scratchy yet sure words falling loose from their mouths attentively and confidently. wide, mesmerizing, glossy, and unmatching eyes staring up at any of his elders was the scrawny boy’s method of showing admiration and appreciation to them, just because of their age, and nothing more. others found him a putrid creature and being, tainted by god himself, for the curse that was his brash heterochromic eyes. he was to be unloved, in a world that never once dared to love him.
from the day- no, moment- kagehira felt his bristling heart sing lovingly in tune with that of a certain blonde’s heart, he found himself entrapped within self-restricting binds of depreciation. the boy was never meant to love, love was never meant to be for the boy, nor anyone for that matter. the inescapable spirits of depression that hungered for his misery reassured him of his most despairing worries. that his feelings were merely a facade he built to entertain himself away from the murky depths of his reality. or how the ethereal being of a woman, narukami, thought naught of such men like mika, who were so insignificant and small they were nothing but crushed ants under the foot of such a goddess.
and yet, mika began to tumble. finding his hands and knees scruffed with dirt for unknown reasons as he clumsily and unknowingly scrambled away from the prying, aching arms of doubt and straight after his beloved familiar.
the mesmerizing memory of narukami guiding the boy through a garden maze, briskly walking ahead as her manicured, inviting, and soft hand held the heterochromic boy’s calloused, rough ones before turning back to face him, sun gleaming atop of her head as the most endearing smile and crinkle of eyes was directed to him, was the only image he needed to continue tumbling down and away from the sweet comfort of pity into anything and everything narukami would want him to be.
the way the sun had peeked through the top of her head, highlighting her dirty blonde hair by creating a halo crown of light only furthered mika’s notion of the woman being a transcendent angel of a human. a delicate smile and effortlessly stunning gaze through long eyelashes and plum eyes kissed orange by the sun, all while her ever so gentle grip on the anxious boy’s hand, set one more idea through the gears of mika’s mind.
perhaps, love is not simply unattainable, but rather an item to care for, tender to it as one would with a plant, to preserve and infinitely keep tall and ever growing. even so, how could the likes of such an irrelevant, forgettable person who could not even be labeled as human by most, ever compete with a model skilled in every capacity? he was nothing more than a piece of gum to be spit out and chewed by her, surely. as he had no place to bear witness to her intoxicatingly charming personality and comforting voice.
in the eyes of god, he was naught more than a peasant. in the eyes of his elders previously at his orphanage, he was naught more than a disfigured and demented creature.
but what was he to the one he looked up to? was he anything at all to the likes of narukami?
“mika-chaann~..” he felt a hand lightly grazing his cheeks, his eyes refocusing and adjusting as he became grounded in his current reality, rather than a timeless loop of a dead past. the hand peacefully stroking his cheek was a touch so light it was as if a dew were allowing itself to fall into a body of water, combining itself to be whole once more. his vision at last unblurred to make out narukami lying on her side in a shared bed, one arm lazily holding herself up while the other lovingly held mika’s face. the reflective sheer material of her violet silk pajamas complimented her figure with each individual ripple, fold, and wrinkle spread across her clothed body. the purple pajamas… they were mika’s favorite nightwear on arashi.
“you were out of it my love, are you okay?”
her voice was so featherlight mika could burst into tears. no longer were the days where mika could find comfort in being an amateur, a thing less than human looked down upon, a half that is less than a half, while looking up to one whom he presumed as almighty and inhumanely perfect. he was a foolish, foolish boy who now knew better than to follow anyone’s commands like a marionette being strangled by their strings.
this woman, narukami- no, arashi, naru-chan, was not above himself, not above humans. the warm blood pooling underneath the flesh of her silky palm decorated with freshly lavender painted nails, to match her eyes, resting on top of his cheek was an undeniable verification of her being just like himself. that fact enveloped mika’s body like a sprouting white tulip, surrounding him with a calm euphoria.
she was the sun rising when all was dark, and he was the rest and shine of the moonlight to accompany her glow. an intertwined fate, where one force is at a loss without the presence of another.
he was not a creature less than her.
he was a finite mortal, akin to her, and oh how he came to admire himself for sharing such a title with her glorious self.
the wordless caress, fingers brushing against the messy locks of mika and other fingers rubbing at his resting hand, left mika’s lips ajar, half-lidded eyes counting the freckles littered around her cheeks like stars replacing any possible words that could’ve left his lips
“i love you, mika. you are so beautiful.”
the cradle in which she held him was one so pure, a hold that whispered of promised assurance and an eternity of love, any combination of letters and syllables died in the smaller man’s mouth. yet, the warm-blooded arms that surrounded him were not merely an empty, lifeless promise but one that was a solidified part of his reality.
he had nothing more to worry about with her by his side.
“n-naru-chan…please.. kiss me.”
he pathetically choked out. he was desperate. desperate for her affections, something he could now cling onto for dear life and hope to god that he wouldn’t let her go, just as everything else did in his life.
“i..i want ya to kiss me ‘til i can’t breathe ‘nymore. i wanna feel ya all around me so please please don’t let me go naru-chan.”
his breathy voice left his lungs lurching for air as he looked in awe at the beauty of beloved. arashi merely stared back into his differing eyes with a loving gaze. the same gaze he would see when she would give him a prep talk, when he would give her occasional chocolates or flowers, or when she happily watched mika focusing on work.
“i l-love ya so much i dunno how to put it into words.”
he stared at the ceiling like a deer in headlights for a moment.
“ya make everythin’ else go away, w-whenever ya touch me like this. o-oh ‘n… ‘m always thinkin’ about ya and i.. i can’t imagine my life without ya. you are everythin’ i have ever wanted ‘n more. such a beautiful woman like ya doesn’t deserve someone like m-“
she cupped his face and nudged his lips into hers. rough, dry, callous lips met vanilla flavored lip balmed ones. mika could only sigh happily into the extended kiss as he tucked her growing hair behind her ear.
she understood his needs like the back of her hand, and for that he was nothing less than eternally grateful. as repayment, he knew he owed her the world.
little did mika know, his repayment was already fulfilled in naru’s eyes by his mere existence.
arashi fulfilled her wordless promise to mika, her gentle arms wrapping around the man to envelope him around the bed coverings as she pushed him down into the plush material to deepen their kiss. her frantic movements were not a matter of human desire, but an ever growing garden of love she insisted on building upon for the two of them.
there was no “repayment” for either individual ever needed, as when they were united they were not two individuals, but one combined. as the day and night alongside the varying moon phases cannot be separated from one another, the light and illumination from it, that were each other, could not be snuffed away. for narukami was always the light to kagehira’s darkness, and he was the eternal glow to support her.
the two lights of beings in question reconnected as one through melting into each other’s bodies with each lip graze and shoulder squeeze they exchanged, hums from the stars being the only thing heard between the two as they kissed.
everywhere she went, he could feel her presence in every crevice and inch of the surrounding area. he lived and breathed nothing but her aroma and touch she left behind in every spot as he would count down the minutes until he could see her once more. he subconsciously searched for her, his other half, everywhere he went, because she had always been his home, his comfort, in every step he took.
as she pulled away from mika’s now red face, giggling, he knew that they had always been meant for each other. neither one above the other, neither less, as they were both equals. for her sole presence to remind her of such a thing solidified to him that he was home. arashi narukami was the safety he had always been yearning for, and he was finally home.
that little boy within mika that once was warned against love, died when he met arashi, never to been seen again. for this was not just infatuation, but a love that transcended all. not once had she ever dared to treat mika as a possession, something to win, and treat as dirt. she up-lifted him in the same way he had always wished he could’ve been as a child in the orphanage, and he would fight until death to forever up-lift her in the same manner.