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He knew it was a mistake to come here before he even set a foot into the bar, but he just had to see Newt. Vince finally moved the main base from Denver to New York, giving Thomas the chance to see Newt in person again, well not officially because Newt can’t know that Thomas is still alive but at least he gets to see the blond and make sure that he is alright. Though the moment he stepped into the bar, he starts regretting it. He wasn’t as prepared as he thought he was to see the boy- no man, Newt grew up – again.
Newt is even more mesmerizing than Thomas remembers. He only got to see Newt in pictures and very few times from far away for three years since the blond had moved to New York for university before The Right Arm relocated their base and pictures don’t do Newt any justice. His hair is slightly longer and keeps falling in front of his eyes, he’s taller than the last time Thomas saw him but the brunet notes with satisfaction that Newt is still smaller than him. When Thomas looks over to the booth Newt is sharing with his friends, he is certain that his heart skipped a beat when he saw Newt laughing, his whole face lighting up with happiness. Shit, how much he wishes that Newt would laugh because of him, how much he wishes he could sit over there and just spend time with him.
He quickly looks away from the booth when one of Newt’s friends, Thomas thinks his name is Gally, looks over to the bar and notices that Thomas is staring. He desperately hopes that Gally isn’t going to point it out to the others, Vince would kill him if his secret got uncovered just because he insisted on coming here. Five more minutes go by with Thomas just staring at the drink in front of him without anyone approaching him so even if Gally pointed it out to the others, they didn’t care enough to come up to him.
He is about to check if the friend group is still sitting at the booth when he hears a very familiar voice close to him and he freezes, not daring to look in the direction of the voice. He listens intently to Newt ordering something to drink, he cautiously looks to the side, starving to see Newt again from up close, and his breath hitches. Shit, there is no one standing between him and Newt, he could even touch the Brit if he wanted to (but he won’t, he’s not a creep, jeez). He really missed this guy, Thomas used to forget everything around him when he looked at Newt and it has only gotten worse because damn, Newt is absolutely beautiful, no, not even 'beautiful' does Newt any justice but it comes the closest to describing how helpless Thomas feels whenever he looks at him. He would do anything just to have Newt look at him like he used to before everything went down.
“Hey there,” a strange voice rips Thomas out of his thoughts, simultaneously someone is stepping between him and Newt, making him want to strangle this stranger. This was the closest he has gotten to his former friend in three years and this guy has the audacity to step between them? What the actual fuck?
“Hey,” Newt responds with a smile that makes Thomas weak in the knees and it isn’t even directed at him.
“What’s your name?” the stranger asks and god, why is he still talking? Doesn’t he feel that Thomas wants to kill him the first chance he gets? He has to feel it, Thomas it’s sure that it is radiating from him.
“I’m Newt,” the blond says. Has Newt never heard anything about ‘stranger danger’? Okay, Thomas probably shouldn’t think that because if Newt would stay away from strangers at all costs, then Thomas would never have become his friend five years ago.
“Pleasure to meet you, Newt. I’m Eric,” the man holds out his hand for Newt to shake and Thomas has to suppress an annoyed groan when the blond actually does shake Eric’s hand. Newt doesn’t know what the man touched before, he shouldn’t just shake his hand.
’Stop it!’ Thomas scolds himself. He can’t forbid Newt to get to know new people, if Newt wants to flirt with this guy then Thomas has to accept it but damn, he really doesn’t want to. He grips the glass in front of him tightly, he needs to stay calm.
“Nice to meet you too.”
“Are you alone here?” Eric inquires.
“As a matter of fact,” Thomas follows Newt’s eyes when the blond looks towards his friends and he sees Minho smirking widely and nodding furiously. “I am alone here.”
Thomas should never have come here. Now he has to watch Newt flirt with this guy and maybe even leave with him at the end of the night and he isn’t sure if he can deal with that.
“May I buy you a drink then?” At least Eric is somewhat polite, he still sucks though.
“Yeah, I’d like that.”
Alright, that’s it. Thomas decides to quickly finish his drink and then leave, he can’t watch this any longer. He knows he should make sure Eric doesn’t try to drug Newt or anything, but he is sure that Minho and the others will have an eye on the pair and ensure that nothing will happen to the Brit so he can leave without being afraid that Newt gets in trouble.
He is about to finish his drink when his phone vibrates in his pocket, indicating a call. He quickly pulls it out of his pocket and groans in annoyance, of course, it’s Vince who calls him, it’s always Vince.
“Yeah?” he asks when he accepts the call.
“Come to the base, I have a job for you,” Vince says curtly. This is one of the many things Thomas hates about his job, you are never really free because when Vince calls you, you pick up and do whatever kind of job he gives you, doesn’t matter if you’re busy otherwise.
“I don’t have time for that right now,” he grumbles, trying to get out of the job anyway. He isn’t actually busy since he will probably spend the rest of the night lying on his couch, drowning in self-pity but he just really doesn’t feel like talking to anyone right now.
“What is possibly more important than your job?” Vince asks and Thomas just knows that the leader is frowning. Thomas refrains from saying that his sanity is more important because he would never hear the end of it. “Wait, don’t tell me. You’re stalking your boy again, aren’t you?”
Damn him for always being able to read Thomas even through the phone.
“I’m not stalking him, I’m making sure that he doesn’t get himself in trouble,” Thomas states and quickly adds, “And he’s not my boy.”
Vince huffs. “Sure, he’s not your boy but you ramble about him at least an hour every day.”
Thomas wishes he could say that it’s not true but it sadly is and he hates it.
“Shut up,” he pouts.
“Come to the base, Mitch,” Thomas cringes at the name, it’s been three years and he still isn’t used to people calling him Mitch, he barely responds when someone calls him by that name and he really needs to fix it because it makes people think that he is hard of hearing, which wouldn’t be that big of a deal if it weren’t for everyone nearly yelling at him instead of talking to him at a normal volume.
“Can it wait until tomorrow?” he doesn’t feel up for spending the night going over some kind of plans with his uncle.
“No. See you in ten,” with that Vince just hangs up the call, causing Thomas to look at his phone in disbelief. That was unnecessarily rude.
He pockets his phone again and swiftly finishes his drink before discretely looking at Newt and Eric. Eric sits awfully close to Newt and it makes the brunet feel sick but he also notices something else. The man is holding a drink in his hand and this causes an idea to pop up in Thomas’s head, so he stands up, determined to pull through with his plan. It isn’t a big plan, it’s nothing that hasn’t been done before, but it is something he hasn’t done before and it fills him with a strange sense of anticipation.
He walks by Newt and Erik and ‘accidentally’ shoulder-checks Eric harshly, causing the man to spill his drink all over Newt who yelps in surprise. Thomas doesn’t even try to keep the smirk off his face when he walks outside. He didn’t mean for the drink to spill all over Newt, he was hoping that it would hit Eric, nevertheless, it disrupted their conversation and hopefully makes Newt want to go home to change and stay far away from this guy. This should work, this plan is basically bullet proved.
~*~
It didn’t work.
Of course, it didn’t fucking work.
Thomas sits across from Dmitri, a guy he works with who started around the same time as he did. If Thomas had to define their relationship, he would say they’re friends. They don’t have much in common but they get along just fine and Dmitri is only three years older than him so they’re pretty close in age.
They’re currently sitting in a diner, taking a break from constantly staring at their PC screens in the office. Vince apparently has taken on some high-profile case a couple of days and is forcing Thomas and Dmitri to find out everything about some politician there is to know. They’d been working for five hours straight before it got too much and they decided to get something to eat. They just wanted to have a break from everything for an hour or so but luck isn’t on Thomas’s side today since he spotted a certain blond the moment he entered the diner, and of course, Eric is sitting across from Newt. Thomas doesn’t understand what Newt sees in this guy but it’s not like he could just walk up to the blond and tell him to drop Eric. So instead of saying to Newt what he desperately wants to tell him, he sits here and moves the food on the plate in front of him around with his fork instead of actually eating something, staring daggers at Eric while he is doing it.
“What’s the matter with you, man?” Dmitri asks, shooting Thomas a confused look.
“Nothing,” Thomas mumbles, deciding to at least eat a little bit since he hasn’t eaten anything yet and it’s three in the afternoon already. Though he just can’t keep his eyes off the couple sitting a few tables away, it’s killing him. Eric is the definition of a dickhead, Newt deserves better than that.
“Yeah, sure,” the other man responds, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “What do you keep looking at?”
“Nothing.”
Dmitri arches an eyebrow in disbelief and discretely turns around to follow Thomas’s gaze. “Who’s that?”
“Nobody,” Thomas likes Dmitri, he’s a good guy but he doesn’t understand the concept of minding his own damn business and it’s exhausting.
“Mitch,” Dmitri simply says in a voice that indicates that he will go up and talk to Newt and Eric if Thomas doesn’t respond.
Thomas sighs, “We used to be friends.” Saying this hurts so much, he never meant to leave Newt behind but he didn’t have another choice, he needed to protect Newt and this was the best way to do it.
“Just friends?” the assassin asks in a teasing voice, making Thomas groan in annoyance.
“Yeah,” Thomas frowns. “Why? What are you implying?”
“You seem to be jealous of the guy he’s with.”
“Shut up, I’m not jealous,” the brunet grumbles. Could Dmitri just shut up, please? That would be highly appreciated. Dmitri just keeps looking at him, unconvinced, and that is one of the huge disadvantages of being friends with assassins; they know when you lie. Thomas exhales sharply and decides to just tell Dmitri the truth, maybe he actually has some helpful advice. “Yeah, okay, maybe I am. But he deserves better than what this dickhead can offer him.”
Dmitri’s expression doesn’t change. “And you think you deserve him? A guy who only watches him from afar and judges him for his taste in people?”
Thomas flinches. No, he doesn’t think he deserves Newt, no one is good enough for the blond and he doesn’t just watch him from afar, he knows Newt better than anyone else- well, he knew Newt better than anyone else but that was years ago, he has to admit that Newt probably changed a lot more than Thomas knows and that he doesn’t know him that well anymore if he even knows him at all.
“I think we should go somewhere else,” Dmitri says when Thomas still didn’t respond after a minute.
“No,” the brunet immediately refuses. He has to stay here, he needs to make sure that nothing will happen to Newt.
“Mitch,” Dmitri’s tone left no room for arguments but doesn’t keep Thomas from arguing anyway. His mum always used to say that he has a strong temper and is too stubborn for his own good sometimes, but these traits helped him to survive the last few years so he definitely is not going to try and get rid of them. He feels his chest tighten at the thought of his mum. He misses her dearly, they didn’t always get along but he loved her so much, and late at night, when he can’t fall asleep and is doubting every decision he has ever made, he wishes she were there to listen to his struggles and reassure him that it’s going to be alright.
“C’mon, dude. I care about this guy,” he says, pushing all the thoughts about his mum aside, he doesn’t have time to get emotional right now.
“If you really care about him, then stop staring at his date like you want to kill this guy and back off a bit,” Dmitri says brutally honest. “Now come on, we’re leaving.”
Thomas reluctantly follows his colleague out of the diner after paying for their meals. He knows that Dmitri is right, he should back off but he just can’t help it. He feels like he left Newt hanging by leaving, he feels like he broke him and he’s just trying his best to look after Newt to make sure that nothing and no one else will ever hurt him.
He wishes he would never have gotten involved with WCKD, maybe he would have had an actual chance with Newt then. Maybe he would have the life he always dreams of.
~*~
He’s at the bar again, but this time it isn’t because of Newt. He had an exhausting week at work and got into an argument with Vince about being ’too reckless’, it made him feel terrible, so he is here to get drunk and blow off some steam. He sadly chuckles at himself when he drowns the second drink in a row, he’s getting wasted on a Saturday night by himself because he has absolutely no one by his side except maybe Dmitri, but they never actually talk outside of work. Thomas is on his own and it fucking sucks.
He decides to slow down a bit on his third drink since the bartender keeps throwing him concerned glances when he sees something out of the corner of his eyes. Is that… Eric? It looks like he is talking with a girl and his body language makes it obvious that it’s more than just a harmless chat – he is flirting with this girl. Thomas thought that Newt and Eric are still dating. Did he miss something? He doesn’t think he did. He keeps watching Eric intently, making sure to not miss anything and he starts to feel sick when he watches Eric press the girl against the wall and starts making out with her.
This piece of shit is cheating on Newt.
Eric has the audacity to cheat on the person that means the most to Thomas, he can’t comprehend it. He contemplates going over there and pulling this guy off the girl but then Eric takes a couple of steps back and says something to the girl, Thomas can’t hear what it is, though the gestures Eric makes towards the restrooms says enough. Thomas makes a decision in a split second.
He follows Eric to the restroom after waiting for a minute to not make it too obvious to anyone who might be watching. He finds the guy standing at the sink, washing his hands, not acknowledging Thomas in the slightest. The assassin swiftly checks if all the stalls are empty before pushing Eric harshly against the sink. The man lets out a pain-filled groan, turning around to face Thomas with anger burning in his eyes.
“What the fuck, man?” he spits out and tries to shove Thomas against a stall but the brunet doesn’t budge in the slightest, he only smirks slightly when he sees fear flashing over Eric’s face when he realizes that he has no chance against the man in front of him.
Thomas slowly walks towards Eric, causing him to back away from Thomas until his back hits the wall. “Stay away from Newt,” Thomas says lowly, grabbing Eric by the throat when he tries to shove Thomas again.
“I don’t know anyone called Newt,” he wheezes. The rage coursing through Thomas’s veins only got worse when Eric denies Newt’s existence. How dare he deny the existence of his boyfriend? What kind of disgusting person does that?
“You don’t know your boyfriend?” Thomas huffs, slightly restricting Eric’s breathing even more by tightening his grip on the man’s throat.
“Who are you?” Eric croaks out, not nearly sounding as tough as he probably wanted to.
“That doesn’t matter. What does matters though, is that you were just trying to hook up with some girl out there and I won’t let you do that,” Thomas says nonchalantly.
“That’s none of your fucking business!” Thomas laughs slightly when Eric keeps trying to act tough while barely being able to breathe. The brunet has to admit, that’s quite an admirable trait, he would even respect Eric for it if he hadn’t just cheated on Newt.
Thomas leans close to Eric’s ear and speaks up in a low voice. “You’re right, it’s Newt’s business and I’m making it mine so you better listen closely now. You are going to go out there and tell this girl politely that you have to leave, afterwards you will go straight to Newt’s place and tell him that you’re breaking up with him. And then you will stay far away from him for the rest of your life.”
“What if I don’t do that?” Eric asks, his voice weak and shaky.
“Then I’m going to pay your hard-working parents a visit and tell them everything about your little job on the side,” he says and leans back to see the panic flooding Eric’s features. Did this guy really think that he was being discrete? It took Thomas five minutes to figure out that he is selling weed, it is pretty obvious. “Don’t look so shocked, Newt might be naïve enough to not understand that you’re dealing but I’m not. I watched you and I will keep watching you until your pathetic life finally finds an end. So you better do what I say or you will regret it. Got it?”
Eric nods quickly, panic evident in every move he makes, Thomas has to fight hard to keep a satisfied expression off his face. “Good. Now go, and trust me, I will know if you don’t do any of the things I told you to do. Oh and you better keep your mouth shut about meeting me, you hear me?”
The man nods again and Thomas releases him, letting him breathe freely again. Eric breathes in deeply while running out of the restroom, only leaving behind a smirking assassin satisfied with his work.
Eric is fucking pathetic.
~*~
He sits in his car in front of Newt and Minho’s dorm and watches them through the window. He followed the taxi Eric took to get here to make sure that he actually pulls through with what Thomas told him to do. The brunet is aware that he shouldn’t drive after drinking something earlier, but he wasn’t taking the chance of not being here to make sure that everything goes according to plan, also he has probably never felt more sober than he does right now.
He curses the fact that he can’t read lips and makes a mental memo to ask Vince if there is a way for him to learn it. Eric is saying something when Newt’s facial expression falls into one of pure sadness, breaking Thomas’s heart, but it’s better this way than to let Newt know that his boyfriend has cheated on him and denied him, he’s only trying to look out for him. He observes how Minho harshly shoves Eric out of the room and slams the door in the man’s face before pulling Newt into a hug. So Eric did what Thomas told him to, good. Even though he should be happy that Eric is out of Newt’s life now and no longer able to hurt the blond, he can’t help but feel terrible for indirectly being the cause of Newt’s misery, but if Eric hadn’t broken up with him now then the guy would’ve cheated on Newt over and over again and one day, the blond would’ve found out and feel even more miserable than he does right now.
Newt will be heartbroken for a few days but he will be okay, Thomas is sure about that, Newt is a fighter and he will always find a way to be alright again.
Thomas comes to a realization while watching Minho comfort Newt; he needs to let the blond go. Not in the way that he will stop looking out for him, but in the way that he will stop interfering in Newt’s relationships except when it’s absolutely necessary to keep him out of harm’s way. The brunet hates that Newt dates other people, he’s got to admit that, but Newt is just living his life and Thomas can’t do anything about that – he wants Newt to live his life and Thomas will accept it when Newt one day finds the person he wants to spend the rest of his life with, it will break him but he will accept it. Newt deserves to be happy.
He needs to stop loving Newt, it will be hard but it’s not impossible. It is going to hurt and make him feel miserable for some time but he will be okay - at least he hopes so.