Work Text:
“Someone could see you doing that, you know.” A voice was heard from the darkness.
Marinette jumped in surprise and dropped the cigarette.
She turned on the left where the voice came from and saw Felix rise from the hanging chair and walk towards her.
Coming out here Marinette didn’t notice him, not even a chair on the huge dark balcony among several indoor trees, and for a while just blinked helplessly as she watched the man approach.
When she ran away from the party – to hide here, catch her breath and forget about everything for a moment, – Marinette was sure that her friends, carried away by the celebration, wouldn’t even notice her absence and she would be able to stay alone.
She didn’t see Felix almost from the beginning of the evening and was sure that he left immediately after the first congratulations.
To be honest, she was surprised that he even came, but after all – it was his cousin’s first real birthday party, – except for an akumatized version of the same event organized by Bubbler when they were still in school.
Adrien had to wait until his 20th birthday. At 18 he still believed that his father could decide everything for him, then, a year later, he actually tried to start a conversation with Gabriel to celebrate with his friends. But when his request was rejected, the model finally moved out to an apartment a month later, and only after another year, when he was turning 20, Adrien was finally able to celebrate his birthday with friends.
And of course his cousin had a right to be here too...
Felix walked over, stood very close to Marinette and took the pack of cigarettes from her hand.
“And then your image of the perfect girl would be over.” He continued, then took out one cigarette, put it in his mouth and reached for the lighter.
Marinette watched in silence as he took the lighter from her hand and lit the cigarette, slightly taken aback by his actions.
The man took a lit cigarette out of his mouth and brought it to her lips. Her mouth reflexively opened and Marinette pressed the little poisoned thing between her lips, still staring into Felix’s eyes, and took a puff.
She probably sucked in more smoke than she should have, because nicotine instantly drugged her, making her head dizzy.
To be honest, Marinette almost never smoked, and even when she did, she almost didn’t inhale. It was rather her attempt to run away somewhere from the hustle and bustle of her life, when it was becoming completely unbearable.
So now, having accidentally taken a deep puff out of confusion, she even swayed slightly from the dizziness of her organism unaccustomed to it.
Felix took a step even closer and confidently, almost unceremoniously supported her shoulders, and Marinette instantly felt a wave of hot shivers run through her shoulders and back when their skin touched.
But that was just out of surprise… And the damn cigarette… It had nothing to do with the fact that Felix stood so close and held her firmly in his hands…
“If you’re dizzy even from an indirect kiss with me,” The man said, looking down at her with a deep and languid look she’d never caught in his eyes before. “Imagine what would happen if I really kissed you.”
Probably Marinette was still confused… or it was the tobacco that still troubled her head… but for some reason her mind vividly responded to his proposal...
And she imagined...
She imagined his hands slid over her shoulders, moving to her back and slipping down.
She imagined Felix leaning even lower towards her, as he had once done, pretending to be Adrien.
She imagined what would have happened if she hadn’t pushed him away then, but allowed herself to be kissed, and it seemed that her head was now spinning not from nicotine, but from his closeness…
Years have passed since that incident, but against her will, Marinette often remembered that day.
Of course, this pressure and impudence, not characteristic of Adrien, helped her then recognize that it wasn’t him. But the more time passed, the less sure she was that she didn’t want it to be him.
Or rather, she imagined what would happen if suddenly one day Adrien became just as direct and daring. What if he could stand up for his desires and achieve them? What if these desires were not only parties with friends on his own birthday?
What if his desire was HER and Adrien expressed it as directly as Felix did then?..
At first, Marinette was slightly horrified that she was comparing two cousins and that Adrien not only lost the competition in her eyes, but she wanted him to be more like Felix.
Like cheeky, direct, cunning, arrogant Felix...
But as time went on, Adrien continued to be soft and succumb to his father’s manipulations, to believe that Lila doesn’t harm anyone, and to consider Marinette as his good friend...
And he wasn’t going to become like Felix...
At the same time, Felix, who had arrived in Paris and appeared to be graduating early from university, began working for his mother’s company.
Amelie Graham de Vanily held multiple businesses, among which was high-end residential design, the organization of elite events and exclusive celebrity concert clothing collections.
Jagged Stone was the one who took Marinette to one of the events hosted by Amelie and introduced them to each other. The woman turned out to be very affable and, although a little too insistent, seemed on the whole the opposite of her taciturn, often sullen son.
After Jagged praised Marinette’s work, Amelie insisted that the girl come to her office with her designs. And so completely unexpectedly, Marinette ended up in an internship at her company.
Well, it was more like an internship technically, because Marinette wanted to fully study at the university and wasn’t ready for a full-time job. And Amelie supported it, but didn’t want to let her go and waste time either. Therefore, in fact, Marinette had a completely free schedule and could lead as many projects as her studies allowed, but her work was paid as a full-time one, despite the fact that she had just graduated from school and only began to study as a designer.
Combining university with work wasn’t easy (not to mention her duties as a Guardian), but the fact that she could instantly put into practice what she learned together with her natural talent quickly formed Marinette into an amazing professional.
Amilie was completely happy with her work and supported in everything, but the most amazing and unexpected thing was that when Marinette had to deal with her boss’s son at work, they never disagreed.
Yes, perhaps they presented their point of view in a very different form, but Felix surprised her every time with his erudition and sharp fresh eyes. His remarks were always to the point and their consideration was only advantageous for projects in the future.
But every time he was near her, Marinette didn’t see this adult, serious man talking about the project, but that impudent teenager who had tried to kiss her on the roof a long time ago, and she wondered if the same impudent boldness remained somewhere inside him to this day…
Unfortunately for her, adult Felix behaved more restrained and he also didn’t express any signals that she was somehow interesting to him, so Marinette decided that probably she was only able to catch his attention in her superhero guise...
Until this evening…
Marinette woke up from her thoughts and realized that Felix was still holding her shoulders, not letting her fall, and the cigarette continued to smoke in her hand, clouding the balcony.
“W-why would you k-kiss me?..” The girl finally asked, shaking her head slightly as she tried to compose herself and understand what caused such a sudden change in his behavior – Felix never allowed himself to touch her in his mother’s office, unless by accident.
Felix bent slightly towards her face and looked into her eyes.
“The right question is,” He said quietly. “Why wouldn’t I?”
Marinette sucked in a shuddering breath and froze, staring at him dumbfounded as Felix straightened up, gently released her shoulders and took the cigarette from her hand.
She probably no longer needed his support, but the fact that Marinette could stand without staggering didn’t mean at all that she didn’t immediately feel fragile and lonely without his warm hands on her skin...
While Marinette was surviving through her disappointment, Felix raised the cigarette to his lips and inhaled lightly, then puffed out the smoke and looked at her again.
“I like your indirect kiss too.” He said calmly, as if the words were nothing special and didn’t cause heat to descend down her abdomen. “Although I’m sure that without a cigarette as an intermediary you taste much better.”
Marinette closed her mouth, which for some reason was open, and swallowed nervously.
She wasn’t sure what was happening.
She just wanted to run away from her friends to the balcony.
For some reason, Alya tried all evening to somehow put Marinette next to Adrien, as if they were back at school and Marinette still had her naive crush on the model. And to all the hints and then frank assurances to her friend that there was no longer any need for it, Alya only smiled condescendingly, saying ‘of course, of course’ and continued to act the same.
Marinette knew that it was probably her own fault. She had told Alya so many times before that she was done with it, only to start blushing in front of Adrien again…
But now everything was different, because for a long time she had been secretly admiring a different man. Who seemed to completely ignore her.
Again, until tonight…
Or was she misunderstanding something?
Marinette looked at Felix carefully. It was probably safest to answer his words in a half-playing way – she could always pretend that she was joking...
“How can you be sure of something you’ve never tried?” She asked slowly, trying to weigh every word.
“Or maybe I did try it,” Felix declared, smirking. “And you just don’t know about it.”
What?
How could he know her taste?..
Felix couldn’t kiss her without her knowing about it, could he?!
Looking at the smug expression on his face, Marinette wasn’t so sure anymore...
“Are we talking about the same thing right now?” She clarified, a little confused.
Felix looked at her with an enigmatic look, then returned the cigarette to her.
“I’m talking about kissing you, Marinette.” He stated directly. “What are YOU talking about?”
“B-but... you never... k-kissed me…” The girl stuttered again as she felt embarrassed and excited at the same time.
“Sometimes my fantasies are so vivid that it feels like I did.” He told her, completely leaving Marinette speechless.
His fantasies?
About kissing her?
But… But… He never showed that he...
“Y-your f-fantasies?..” Marinette repeated, dumbfounded. “D-do you kiss me in y-your fantasies?..”
Felix took her hand with a cigarette and brought it to his lips.
“I’m not only kissing you in my fantasies, Marinette.” He said, then took a puff and puffed out the smoke. “I do what I want with you.”
Marinette looked at him again with her mouth open, her eyes fixed on his actions. Hot waves continued to ripple through her body from where their skin met, and his words sent the heat down again, making her groin whine with arousal.
“And what…” Marinette swallowed. “What do you want to do with me?” She whispered, forgetting to be nervous and stutter in the tide of her desire.
Felix lightly squeezed her wrist, which he still held, and pulled it aside, as if removing an unnecessary barrier between their faces. Then he leaned down to her ear and ran his nose over it, whispering:
“Everything.”
Marinette felt like she was suffocating from his proximity. Her whole body burned with excitement, her chest heaved rapidly, her breath hitched. Her hands were trembling, and as Felix’s palm slid up over the bare skin of her arm, Marinette dropped her cigarette, but she barely even noticed it because all her attention was focused on the man leaning over her, – his breath now searing the skin of her neck.
“Then why didn’t you ever do it for real?..” Marinette whispered, seemingly losing control of what she did and said, but if it led her to get what she wanted, she didn’t mind.
“Do what?” Felix asked, running his nose over her exposed collarbone as if inhaling her scent.
“Kiss me…” Marinette whispered, involuntarily closing her eyes and tilting her head to let him explore more of her skin.
“I’m afraid one kiss from you won’t be enough for me, Marinette.” He whispered back, running his hand down her shoulder. “I want everything, right away, and for good. Would you let me have it?”
Everything? And right away? And for good?
Marinette trembled at the mere idea of belonging to this man… Even his slightest touch made her whole body burn and promised so much more that her legs seemed to give way with desire...
But it was all so unexpected... What did it all mean for Felix? Was it just a desire to have her? Or was it something more to him than only the attraction he clearly expressed?
“And what would you give me in return?” She asked, pulling away so she could see his eyes and still struggling to wake up from her drunken, enslaved state.
Felix’s hands slid behind her back and wrapped around Marinette’s waist, pulling her slightly towards him, and as his aroused flesh pressed into her burning groin, it didn’t seem to matter to her anymore if he promised her anything in return. Because she felt just how much her body was ready to rush towards him, how much his own body wanted her…
It felt like she was ready to give herself to this man here and now in any case...
Felix looked into her eyes with a very serious straight look.
“Whatever you want, Marinette.” He said confidently, making her melt in his arms. “Everything except my heart.”
Marinette’s heart sank.
Somehow, knowing that for Felix it was just a desire, a physical attraction, and he wasn’t willing to risk his heart, made all the difference.
Or rather, it was not even that that made Marinette change her mind, but the fact that he frankly said about it. After all, otherwise she would always have hoped that he was really infatuated with her just as much as she was infatuated with him...
Marinette felt her chest shrink in resentment and a lump roll up in her throat.
She looked away, trying to hide her disappointment.
Maybe she really could have given herself to him, even knowing from the very beginning that nothing serious would come of it...
But...
She knew that this wasn’t what she wanted.
The moment Felix touched her, the moment he showed her that something was possible between them, Marinette realized that his heart was perhaps the most important, perhaps the only thing she wanted to receive from him in return…
She was still looking away, trying not to cry when Felix spoke again.
“I can’t give you my heart, Marinette,” Felix repeated as if he wanted to finish her off completely, “Because it has long been yours and I have no power over it.”
Marinette turned to him, her eyes widening in even more shock than the one in which she was plunged into by everything that was happening before.
The man looked at her with such a hopeless gaze as if he really had just given her everything, including his heart, and now his whole life was in her hands...
“Felix…” Marinette whispered in disbelief. “Are you…” She couldn’t even continue saying it outloud – so impossible it sounded.
Was he in love with her?
“Desperately.” Felix confirmed as if reading inside her head, and Marinette’s chest pierced with an almost painful hot thrill, as if reviving her from her own despair.
“But you never…” Showed her? Told her? Gave her any reason to think he felt that way.
“I never thought that you could reciprocate my feelings.” He confessed. “I don’t smile at people just because it’s expected of me and I don’t hide my flaws in order to appear perfect.
Was he talking about Adrien? Of course, Felix, like everyone else, knew about her long crush… But… Did he really think that she could only fall in love with someone like Adrien?
Adrien, whom she once wanted to become like Felix...
“And what has changed today?” She asked.
Maybe at this party, he somehow realized that Marinette hadn’t looked at Adrien the same way for a long time?
“Nothing.” Felix replied to her surprise. “I have long been accustomed to the fact that my every day is determined only by whether I see you or not.” He said without taking his eyes off her and in such a tone, as if this really was knowledge he had long accepted. “That I was ready to work on a project all night long, just to discuss it with you in the morning and being able to accidentally touch your skin while turning the pages in your hands. And then look for the next opportunity, because this seems to have long been the only thing that kept me going.”
He sighed and closed his eyes.
“But when I realized that I envied the cigarette in your lips because it could touch them and I couldn’t…” He opened his eyes and looked at her again. “I think it’s safe to say that I lost the last resistance to stay away from you…”
Marinette stared at him in absolute amazement.
Her chest fluttered with a happiness that she had never experienced before, and which, perhaps, could only be felt in the sensation of her feelings being reciprocated…
Her feelings?
Of course Marinette was in love with this man for a long time! With his rigor and purposefulness. With his confidence and steadfastness. With the amazing accuracy of his opinion and the stability of his aspirations.
Or maybe with that impudent, daring boy who once tried to kiss her...
“Since you can’t stay away from me anyway,” Marinette said finally. “Why don’t you act out your fantasy and see if it feels different in reality?”
Felix looked at her attentively, as if trying to read what was behind her motives, just like she was trying to understand the seriousness of his intentions only a few minutes ago.
“A fantasy where I kiss you?” He asked in a whisper, hope burning in his lost eyes.
Marinette placed her palms on his chest and licked her lips, pressing her whole body against his.
“All of them.” She whispered back, breathless with anticipation.
Felix’s gaze flared with desire with renewed vigor, and Marinette saw that he was no longer lost, but found, and it seemed to her that she was found together with him.
“Marinette…” He whispered, pulling her even closer to him and breathing heavily.
His eyes darted across her face, as if studying her features for the first time, as if Felix wanted to make sure it was really her and not a trick of his imagination... And Marinette knew she was staring at him with the same desperate look.
When his face hung over hers so close that she could inhale his breath, the sensation intoxicated her a hundred times more than nicotine, and her head was spinning from the mere anticipation of his kiss...
By the time Felix’s lips finally touched hers, the cigarette on the floor had already stopped smoking, and Marinette knew she wouldn’t need a new one.
Because she didn’t want to run away from her life anymore.
She didn’t want to run away because she found her place.
And this place was in Felix’s arms.