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The first bottle is Keeley's, bubblegum. She says she doesn't have to suffer just to be considered an adult in her own home that she owns and that she bought with her own earnings, and if she wants mouthwash that's sweet and pink, she's gonna have that. She almost dares Roy to say anything.
He says nothing, because he knows what's good for him.
~
Roy's came in next, standing next to Keeley's. It's hypoallergenic for sensitive gums, and he was sensitive about it at first. He vaguely feels that it's not manly enough, but he's learning to deal with that. It has an extremely strong minty smell, but it doesn't burn like the regular kinds.
~
The third to come in is actually Phoebe's. She has a little plastic step stool that lives in the corner when she's not staying over, and she climbs on it to be able to see herself in the mirror and reach the tap.
The bottle of mouthwash has pictures from Frozen on it, and inevitably after each use the little girl says "Brr, it's like ice!" and laughs, although it's unclear if she's laughing at her own joke or at her uncle's expression.
~
It takes a while for Jamie to bring his stuff when he starts spending nights with them. The first morning after, he takes a swig from Roy's mouthwash and immediately gags.
"Oh God, that's disgusting."
"Thanks," Roy says and snatches the bottle from his hand.
"What is that? You don't taste like that."
Roy grumbles.
"What?"
"I said, it fades in ten minutes or so."
"Hm," Jamie says. "Well, I'll kiss you again in ten minutes."
"Noted."
~
The second time, about four days later, he tries Keeley's. He swishes it in his mouth with a thoughtful expression.
"Like it?" Keeley asks.
He nods seriously, then tilts his head back for a methodical gargle.
"I'll buy you your own bottle, alright? I don't want you finishing mine."
He shakes his head, spits in the sink, and then shakes his head again. "Nah, s'alright. Not like I live here."
~
A week later he's standing at the same counter staring at the bottles. Gingerly, he reaches for the Frozen bottle.
Roy grunts.
"I'm only taking a sip."
Roy grunts again.
Jamie waits.
"...You're not gonna tell me I'm a child?"
"This literally belongs to my nine year old niece," Roy says. Jamie shrugs. "On the other hand," Roy adds, "I just had your dick in my mouth half an hour ago, so no, I'm not going to call you a child."
Jamie snickers and gets swatted on the arse for it. He has to wait until he stops giggling before he can take a sip from Phoebe's mouthwash.
And he immediately spits it out.
"What the fuck, how is this worse than yours?! Why does it feel like I put my tongue in dry ice?"
Roy points wordlessly at the snow-twirling princess smiling brightly on the bottle.
"Ugh," Jamie gives his opinion. He rinses his mouth with plenty of water. Meanwhile, Roy shrugs and starts brushing his own teeth.
Jamie watches him for a long minute.
"Fire-breathing. This is why she gets to play the dragon," he eventually says. That gets him another swat.
~
Eventually, Jamie's bottle of whitening mouthwash materialises in Keeley's bathroom, standing next to the others. And his face mask. His skin lotion. Shaving cream. Hair gel. One day Keeley stands in front of the counter, toothbrush in hand, and realises Jamie had been in her bed every night for three weeks straight. He's living with them, in a way he hasn't before.
If she was Roy, she'd have yelled 'Fuck'.
But she isn't, so she just purses her lips and stares at the mirror for a long moment, and then shrugs and continues brushing her teeth.
[end]