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"Hey Rob," Nancy moved one hand from the steering wheel, setting it on Robin's thigh but keeping both eyes on the road in front of them, "You've gone quiet. I'm starting to get worried." Nancy gave her a little squeeze. There was a small part of her that was joking, but only the tiniest part. Nancy realized the only sound in the car was the radio-Robin had stopped talking a couple blocks back-which was barely audible.
Robin stopped anxiously fiddling with the fabric of the towel in her lap, placing one of her hand's over Nancy's; hoping the towel was successful in hiding her nerves by keeping her hand from being overtly clammy. Nancy was right about one thing though, Robin was being quiet, at least on the outside. Because on the inside everything wasn't so quiet. Her mind was racing with a million thoughts.
Thoughts that were tripping over each other and crashing into each other forming new hybrid thoughts that Robin couldn't manage to keep track of.
"We can turn back if you want," Nancy's voice was soft, calming, filled to the brim with sincerity. There was no hint of annoyance that their plans, plans that had been agreed upon weeks ago, could possibly fall through.
"We could just have a quiet night in," Nancy turned her hand over to interlock their fingers, "I'll pop some popcorn, take some candy from Mike's, not-so-secret, secret stash," that got a laugh out of Robin and she squeezed Nancy's hand in response. "Whatever makes you happy Sweetheart. Just tell me, " Nancy rubbed her thumb over Robin's hand, glancing at her from the corner of her eye.
"No, it's okay Princess. I want to...I want to do this. I'm just...thinking," Robins eyes were locked on the sights that flashed by as they drove; mostly just trees and nothingness lit up by the full moon's glow, which was pretty reassuring. It would be just the two of them, like Nancy had promised.
This time Nancy fully glanced at Robin for a moment before turning back to look at the road, "care to share those thoughts with me?"
Robin shrugged, there were a lot of things she could say. A lot of things she probably should say. But some of those things didn't feel right.
Robin felt nervous; though she knew she didn't have to be. Didn't need to be, not with Nancy, not with anything up until this point in their relationship that was. But what if Nancy, the most desired girl in Hawkins, Wheeler didn't like what she saw? And fuck if Robin didn't absolutely hate that the thought even crossed her mind. But it did. And it had settled somewhere in her head; settled in and made a home and logic wasn't strong enough to push it away.
Logic: Robin knew Nancy wasn't like that. Robin knew that Nancy wasn't shallow. Knew that She liked every aspect of Robin, but maybe not this one? Because Nancy had yet to experience this one.
Hair on a guy was one thing, but hair on a girl? Double standards that sometimes even the most open minded people fell victim to.
Robin lifted Nancy's hand to her lips, pressing a warm kiss to the back of it, "I'm just a little nervous, not because I'm not excited, because I am..." She hastily added the last part before continuing, "it's just I've never done this before, never really hung out with anyone who'd drag me out to Lovers' Lake to go skinny dipping."
Nancy scoffed, "drag you out to the lake? Are you saying you weren't practically falling over yourself as soon as I mentioned it," there was a hint of a smile on Nancy's face that bled into her words, which told Robin she wasn't actually offended. If anything she was the complete opposite; entirely amused.
"I just meant...first time jitters," Robin chuckled.
"So you do want to do this? Because we're here and I just need you to be honest with me Rob." Nancy pulled off the main road onto a barely there makeshift path, the grass was slightly shorter from pervious cars driving through.
"I want to do this Nance," Robin assured.
Nancy turned off the car, leaning over the middle console and pressing her lips against Robin's; they were warm and tasted sweet. Tasted of Cola Chapstick, "I'll get the bag from the back seat."
Robin smiled before getting out of the car where it fell instantly, she lifted up her shirt ever so slightly, the soft hairs of her happy trail visible in the moonlight. Fuck. She could feel hot tears behind her eyes.
No, Robin wasn't ashamed of her body, or her hair, on the contrary; she was proud of it and maybe that was why she was filled to the brim with fear. Nancy never made her feel self conscious, but there was something about this moment that was making Robin's brain go haywire. Made her feel like maybe some things were too good to be true. Icarus and flying too close to the sun, or some bullshit like that.
"Robs, you okay?" Nancy appeared from around the back of the car, duffle bag slung over one shoulder, flashlights in hand.
"Yea are you?" Robin asked, holding out her hand.
Nancy pulled her bottom lip between her teeth, considering prying more, but settling on handing the flashlight over, "I'm okay if you're okay."
"Nancy wheeler you are beyond cheesy and I was actually asking for your hand, but thank you for the flashlight M'lady," Robin moved the flashlight to her left hand, repeating the action of holding her hand out.
"Oh, sorry." Nancy laughed, cheeks growing pink, tucking some of her curls behind her ear before taking Robin's hand in her own. It was warm and clammy. But nevertheless it felt perfect.
"There shouldn't be any lake beasts under the water, y'know...swamp things or whatever, if that's what you're worried about." Nancy playfully bumped shoulders with Robin, "and if there are I'll protect you. I promise."
Robin laughed and returned the shoulder bump, "well I wasn't worried about that until you brought it up, thank you by the way for that."
"I said I'd protect you!" Nancy shot back defensive.
"I'll hold you to that." Robin grinned.
The rest of the walk was silent. Filled with the sounds of chirping crickets and the soft crunch of grass under their feet.
"Hey Nance," Robin's voice was shaky as she watched Nancy setting up the blankets in the grass.
"Hmm?" Nancy asked looking up from where she was crouched.
"I just..." Robin cleared her throat and Nancy stood up, feeling her uneasiness.
"Talk to me Rob," she reached for Robin's hand but Robin stepped back ever so slightly, fingers fidgeting with the bottom of her own shirt.
Robin could feel her heart racing, it felt as if it was literally going to abandon ship and jump right out of her throat. She closed her eyes, so she wouldn't have to watch Nancy's face, lifting her shirt up slowly. "I..." her voice quivered.
"Are you hurt?" Nancy sounded worried as she moved cautious, barely running her fingers over the soft skin of Robin's tummy as well as the delicate hair that stopped just before her belly button.
"No...it's not," Robin grabbed Nancy's hand, resting it over her happy trail, "it's this." She sounded small.
"This?" Nancy traced her fingers over that same spot, "this is what you're worried about?" Nancy looked up, looking into Robin's eyes, the moon highlighting the tears that didn't quite fall.
"There's more...you know," Robin flicked her eyes down and then back up to Nancy.
"Robin," Nancy cooed, letting Robin's shirt fall, her hands moving to cup her cheeks. She ran her thumbs over Robin's cheeks, despite the fact that there were no tear trails.
"Robin, I don't care how much hair you choose to have on your body. I'm not going to be repulsed by you because of it. That would be complete bullshit." Nancy shook her head before pressing her forehead to Robin's. "You don't have to worry about what I think about your body, you're the most amazing woman...most amazing person, I've ever met and I wouldn't, I don't, want you to change. Don't want you to question who you are around me."
"You're not mad?" Robin croaked barely above a whisper.
"Why would I be mad?" Nancy pulled away, looking into Robin's eyes, "of course I'm not mad Sweetheart." Nancy slowly lowered her hands back down, finding the small line of hair underneath Robin's shirt and running her fingers along it, "but I am excited to see what you look like without this shirt on, if you'll let me."