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Neil was having a day. And by that, he meant he hadn’t slept in a few days, and it was starting to take its toll. Practice seemed to stretch on, and he was dragging his feet everywhere he went— but sleep seemed impossible. He had so much to do, and anyway, he really wasn’t a fan of the recurring nightmares. At any rate, he wasn’t about to drop everything and get the sleep he needed. Plus, nobody seemed to notice.
Except, after practice, Andrew came up to him and asked if he wanted to go on a drive.
“Not now, though. Later, around sunset. You look like you haven’t slept in a week. I thought you might like to get away for a bit.”
…Okay, so maybe someone had noticed.
“That… actually sounds nice. Thank you.”
Neil accepted, more because he knew it would get him out of human interaction for the rest of the evening than anything else. Still, as he and the others headed back, he found himself anticipating the drive, and not in a bad way, either. He was sort of, kind of, maybe… excited. Maybe it came as a package deal with whatever was between him and Andrew now.
(Even so, he wasn’t about to tell anyone.)
Neil didn’t do anything in particular to prepare. He thought about changing into a nicer sweater, sure, but it was getting cold, and he’d probably need something warmer, right? It didn’t have anything to do with the little voice in the back of his head telling him to look nice for Andrew. Nope. Nothing at all.
He still did it, though.
When he went to meet Andrew in the parking lot, it wasn’t quite sunset, but the light through the trees was golden as they got into the car. Andrew started the car, then turned on the radio, and the speakers crackled to life, a song already halfway through playing.
as long as i gaze on
waterloo sunset
i am in paradise.
They drove fairly quietly. Andrew didn’t try and make small talk, or ask questions, instead glancing at Neil every so often. The silence wasn’t stifling, but comfortable— somehow, it was better than if either of them had tried to make conversation.
Andrew stopped the car somewhere Neil hadn’t been before. “We’re here.” He turned off the car, motioning for Neil to get out. He did.
He noticed that they were at a river.
“We’re at a river,” Neil said, more a statement than an observation.
“No shit, Sherlock?” Andrew said. His tone was sharp, but his eyes betrayed a flicker of lightheartedness. He led Neil down to the riverbank and took a seat. Neil followed.
The grass was slightly damp, not enough to be uncomfortable, but just enough to lend a touch of coolness to the air. Neil breathed in, feeling like maybe he’d been holding his breath the whole time. “It’s nice here,” he said quietly.
“I thought you might like the sunset,” Andrew said, talking more towards the river than to Neil.
“Thank you,” Neil replied, not quite knowing what else to say. He glanced at Andrew, which was both a wonderful and terrible idea all at once. He was painted in shades of pink and gold and orange from the sunset, light catching in his hair and lending him an ethereal quality.
Neil decided that he really, really wanted to put his head on Andrew’s shoulder.
He leaned in a bit. “Yes or no?”
Andrew looked up in surprise, taking a second to process what Neil was asking.
“Yes.”
Neil let himself fall, and as always, Andrew caught him. He turned his face towards the sunset as Andrew placed an arm around his shoulders, letting him bury his face in Neil’s hair.
Fuck, this was nice.
They stayed like that until the sun was almost gone and the shades of pink and gold faded into purples and reds. That was when Andrew got up— carefully, as not to disturb Neil— and unlocked the car.
“We should head back.”
Neil had almost fallen asleep. “They might be getting worried about us, huh?” He let Andrew help him to his feet and lead him to the car. Andrew got behind the wheel and waited for Neil to fasten his seatbelt before starting the engine. “Maybe.”
The drive back was soporific. Neil let his eyelids fall shut, slowly and lazily, like butter melting in the remnants of the sunlight. Here, he felt safe.
He didn’t wake up until Andrew opened his door. Still, he kept his eyes shut, not wanting to move quite yet. Andrew undid Neil’s seatbelt for him, then paused before lifting Neil up bridal-style and carrying him back to the building.
Neil kept pretending to sleep, because this was getting good, and he was a little bit curious about what else Andrew might do if he thought Neil was asleep.
It turned out that Andrew took Neil back to a room— he wasn’t quite sure which— and placed him in one of the beds. “You better get all the sleep,” he said under his breath before making sure Neil was tucked under the blankets. When his footsteps got further away, Neil pretended to stir. He reached an arm out from under the covers in what he hoped was the right direction.
Andrew’s footsteps paused, then got closer.
There was a soft sigh. “Fine.” Andrew lifted the covers and slid into bed next to Neil. “If you steal all the blankets, I’m leaving.” But he obligingly pulled Neil close as he slipped back into sleep.
Neil woke up only once that night, and not from a nightmare. He looked around, not quite sure where he was, and then recognised the familiar weight of an arm across his chest.
To his right was Andrew, his face in an unusually soft caricature of peace. Neil smiled softly. He couldn’t help it.
He leaned back into the pillows, letting his eyes close once again, and drifting back into sleep.
Neil dreamed of sunsets and riverbanks and heads resting on obliging shoulders as a familiar song wove its way through his mind.
as long as they gaze on
waterloo sunset
they are in paradise.