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“Do you think we’re ready to be parents?”
Sheldon looked up from his laptop. He looked questioningly at Amy.
“What?”
“Do you think we’re ready to be parents?” she repeated.
She had a strange look on her face. She also sounded breathless.
“I think that’s neither here nor there,” said Sheldon logically. “Ready or not, there’s a baby inside of you. It won’t adhere to our time table.”
“Does that frighten you?” asked Amy.
Sheldon glanced at the wall, meaning that he missed her wince.
“A bit,” said Sheldon. “This kid will have a steep learning curve when it comes to following my bathroom schedule.”
Amy choked out a laugh. Sheldon looked at her.
“Are you worried?” asked Sheldon.
Amy locked eyes with him.
“Worried I’ll wake up and the last decade will be a dream,” said Amy.
Sheldon smiled.
“I feel the same way,” said Sheldon. “Except I wouldn’t mind it if it meant not wasting eight years of my life just to watch that mediocre Game of Thrones fina —”
“Sheldon,” gasped Amy. She was clutching her stomach. “It’s time.”
“Time for what?” asked Sheldon, uncomprehending. “We’re not watching House of the Dragon.”
“No, Sheldon,” grunted Amy. “It’s time.” She pointed to her stomach. “He’s coming!”
“Oh,” said Sheldon plaintively. His eyes widened. “Oh!”
***
“Keep doing those breathing exercises, Amy,” said Dr. Janice Malcolm.
Dr. Malcolm was Amy’s OB/GYN. Sheldon had made the point that he was well-versed in Amy’s uterus and would be a suitable alternative, but that idea was shot down much to his chagrin.
“How much longer?” groaned Amy.
“You’re only seven centimeters dilated,” said Sheldon before the doctor could respond. “About the size of a peach. You need to get to the size of a grapefruit.”
“You cannot possibly compare me pushing out a human baby to fruit!” said Amy.
“Of course not,” said Sheldon placatingly. “If anything, the grapefruit — also known as the forbidden fruit — can be more aptly compared to my genitalia, which until I met you …”
“Sheldon!” shrieked Amy. Sheldon fell silent. “Thank you, Doctor.”
Dr. Malcolm nodded. She glanced over her shoulder at Amy as she reached the doorway.
“I bet that epidural is sounding better and better.”
Amy tilted her head in acknowledgement. Sheldon whipped his head around as the door closed.
“What did she mean by that?” he demanded.
Amy’s resulting scream from her next contraction prevented her from responding. Sheldon looked nervously at her.
“What can I do?” he asked. “I can read to you? Or I can recite my Nobel acceptance speech. Oh!” he said, bouncing eagerly. “I know. I’ll get you a hot beverage. That always helps.”
“You know what would really help?” asked Amy through gritted teeth.
“What?”
“If you took that hot beverage and threw it in your own face!”
Sheldon blinked as Amy let out another scream.
“Okay,” said Sheldon, hurrying from the room.
“Sheldon, don’t —”
The door slammed behind him.
“So help me; I will turn this child against him,” muttered Amy.
***
“Is he here yet?” asked Penny.
“No, of course not,” said Sheldon. “Any child of mine will be punctual. He’s four days early, which means we still have plenty of labor left.”
“Amy will love to hear that,” said Howard under his breath to Bernadette. The latter smirked.
“So what are you doing out here?” asked Leonard, exasperated.
“Oh, right,” said Sheldon. “Amy asked that I throw a hot beverage in my own face.”
The others stared at him.
“I don’t think she meant —”
“No — hold on a minute, Leonard,” said Raj. “Don’t assume so quickly that you understand Amy and her motives.”
Penny rolled her eyes.
“What did you do, Sheldon?”
Sheldon recounted the past ten minutes. As he finished telling his story, Penny shook her head in amusement.
“One day, this will make a fabulous anecdote to tell people, Sheldon,” said Penny. “Until then — get back in there, hold your wife’s hand, and if she squeezes hard, don’t you dare complain.”
“Got it.” Sheldon ran back the way that he came.
“You get him a little too well,” said Leonard, looking at his wife.
Penny shrugged.
“It’s a gift and a curse.”
***
“I can’t believe he’s finally here,” said Amy.
“I know,” whispered Sheldon. “He’s so … alien-like.”
Amy bit her lip to stop from laughing. Sheldon was still focused on their son.
Their son.
“I never thought I wanted children,” said Sheldon. It felt like he was surrounded by fog. Or under water where everything appeared clearer. He looked at his tired, but glowing wife. “Thank you.”
“For what?”
“For …” Sheldon trailed off. “Being patient. For giving me the time and the space to realize that under the right circumstances and with the right person, I want this.”
Amy’s eyes were shining as she smiled.
“Time and space, huh?” she said. “Pun intended?”
Sheldon stared at her in wonder.
“I know I’ve said it before, but I love you so damn much.”
He leaned in and kissed her. When they pulled apart, she beamed up at him.
“I’ll let you know when it gets old.”
***
“There’s still the matter of his name,” said Amy some time later.
“I’ve given some thought to that,” said Sheldon. After some gentle encouragement that the baby was clean, Sheldon was holding its little hand as the baby slept. “Are you opposed to Leonard?”
Amy thought about it and smiled.
“No, I think that’s wond —”
“Leonard Nemoy Cooper.”
“Jesus Christ, Sheldon,” said Amy, torn between amusement and exasperation.
“Absolutely not,” said Sheldon immediately. “This child is clearly real and we would never hear the end of it from my mother about the types of parents who name their child ‘Jesus’.”
“That’s not — never mind,” said Amy. “Our child’s middle name will not be Nemoy.”
“Fine,” huffed Sheldon. He glanced sideways at her. “Leonard?”
“Yes,” she said, with a slight smile. Sheldon nodded, pleased. “I had another thought for a middle name. If it’s something you want.”
“What is it?” asked Sheldon curiously.
“It’s something that you reminded me of when you mentioned reciting your Nobel acceptance speech,” said Amy. “It got me thinking about how upset you were when you realized that you forgot to acknowledge Dr. Sturgis.”
“Oh, no.”
“Sheldon?” said Amy, immediately turning toward him. He felt her hand on his forearm.
“What’s wrong, Shelly?” asked Mary.
“I ruined my acceptance speech,” said Sheldon.
“What are you talking about, Moonpie?” rasped Meemaw. “It was lovely.”
“I didn’t thank my mentor,” he choked out.
Sheldon looked at Amy with wide eyes.
“What are your feelings on naming our son Leonard John Cooper?” asked Amy.
“I love it,” said Sheldon. “What about you? Don’t you want a name that means something personal to you?”
Amy felt a swell of affection for the man standing in front of her and how much he’s matured.
“Dr. Sturgis helped shape you into the man standing in front of me. It doesn’t get any more personal,” said Amy. “Besides.” There was a twinkle in her eye. “I’ll name our second child.”
***
“Hellooo,” said Raj, sticking his head through the doorframe. “Can we meet the little one?”
“Sure. Come on in,” said Amy.
The group shuffled into the room with Penny and Bernadette immediately aww-ing over the baby wrapped in Sheldon’s arms.
“You’re actually holding him!” said Leonard, amazed.
“We have a deal,” said Sheldon seriously. “He doesn’t defecate on me and I don’t add him to my Mortal Enemies List.”
Penny rolled her eyes. Upon request, Sheldon transferred the baby to her.
“Have you two decided on a name?” asked Bernadette.
“I’d like to put it out there that if you two had a girl, I came up with the perfect name,” said Howard. They all looked at him. “Hear me out — Minnie Cooper.”
Leonard and Raj burst out laughing, and Sheldon looked at Amy.
“I’m fairly certain that borders on child abuse,” she quipped. “Then again, I’m just counting my blessings that I didn’t end up with Spock Cooper. No,” she said when she saw Sheldon’s face.
“So, what is it? What’s his name?” asked Raj eagerly.
Sheldon and Amy exchanged a look. The latter nodded, giving Sheldon the floor. He turned to face their friends.
“His middle name is John. In homage to my first mentor, John Sturgis. That was Amy’s idea,” said Sheldon. “For his first name, we chose someone who is often under-appreciated for his contributions. Especially by yours truly. But he means a great deal to us both. Amy and I also spoke about asking him whether he’ll be our son’s godfather.”
Sheldon paused before looking at Leonard. When he didn’t look away, Leonard’s jaw dropped and Penny clutched at her husband’s arm.
“Me?” said Leonard in shock. “You named him after me?”
“Leonard John Cooper,” said Amy. “If it’s alright with you, of course.”
Leonard nodded hastily and blinked several times. As the realization further sunk in, he pulled Sheldon in for a hug. The taller man rolled his eyes but his expression was fond.
“The same rules apply,” said Sheldon. “If you lose control of your bowels, all bets are off.”
The rest of the group gave watery chuckles and Leonard squeezed his best friend tighter.
“I’d be honored to be his godfather,” said Leonard when they separated.
“Good,” said Sheldon.
“Little Leonard,” said Howard, looking at Raj. “Seems a bit redundant.”
Leonard gave him a withering look.
“I like L.J.,” said Penny.
“That is cute,” agreed Amy.
Sheldon’s eyes suddenly lit up and he looked at Amy.
“I’ll be able to make a godparent contract!”
“With a clause in place that says Leonard needs to give L.J. the sex talk?” said Amy.
Leonard groaned at the look of satisfaction on Sheldon’s face.
“You know me so well,” said Sheldon.