Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The Lodgers had been acting sketchy all day.

Jekyll couldn’t deny he felt uneasy around them- they seemed to be watching his every move, whispering to one another when his back was turned. An odd excitement buzzed in the air, but when he asked them the reason for their glee, they giggled and denied the possibility that anything strange was happening. Hell, he even saw Mr. Griffin smiling. Something was definitely up.

He shook his head, a heavy sigh leaving him weary. Even if they wouldn’t tell him now, he would probably find out about it within the next day or two. Gossip spread like wildfire in the Society- there was no need to worry about being left out of the loop about something important. He would hear of it soon enough- that is, if it was even worth mentioning.

Maybe he was making a big deal out of nothing.

Okay, he was definitely making too big of a deal out of this. Even if it was something important, Jekyll probably didn’t need to lock himself in his quarters after hearing Mr. Archer giggle. Maniacally. In his direction.

Jekyll calmed himself, taking a sip from his wine glass. It was definitely nothing to worry about- he was getting himself all worked up over something so (probably) minuscule. He still had an entire list of things he needed to do, people he had to talk to, chores he was required to complete- he couldn’t barricade himself in his room all day. He had to face the Lodgers sooner or later.

So he stood, stacking his papers neatly, removing his reading glasses and setting them on the table beside him. Jekyll hid the bottle of wine in his desk drawer in case Lanyon walked in and realized he was once again drinking alone- at nine in the morning, no less. Taking a deep breath, he unlatched his door and, with a newfound confidence, strode into the hall to find Jasper.

As he approached Jasper’s lab, he couldn’t help but feel eyes scouring him, burning into his back, flushing his face with their intensity. He looked over his shoulder and shivered as Dr. Helsby and Mr. Sinnett, snickering, hid behind a corner. He could feel a weight drop onto his shoulders, dragging him down.

Okay, that was just a bit unsettling. But it was nothing. They weren’t laughing at him, right? Dr. Jekyll shook his head, hurrying to find Jasper.

He discovered Jasper in Rachel’s kitchen, eating breakfast with Miss Lavender and Mr. Pennebrygg. Jekyll smiled at the group, accepting a scone from Rachel as he entered the room.

“Good morning, how are you all doing today?” His voice was cheerful, hiding the increasing amount of dread that was building behind his throat. Mr. Pennebrygg was holding a strange device between both hands, and the moment Jekyll’s eyes landed on it, he made an effort to slide it onto the counter and behind his back. Jekyll’s smile became more forced the more he thought about what that machine could be. Why was he hiding it? Was it dangerous? Is this what everyone seemed so excited about? Why didn’t he tell him what it was? Another imaginary weight began to burden his back.

“I’m doing well,” Miss Lavender answered, fiddling apprehensively with her fingers. The others nodded, following her lead.

“I’m glad to hear that. Jasper, if you wouldn’t mind following me into the hall to discuss the arrival of a new… pet of yours?” He couldn’t keep his nerves from bleeding into his voice, lips trembling from the effort of maintaining a shiny smile through his stress. Jasper beamed, sliding out of his seat.

“Although, before I leave, would you mind telling me about that machine of yours?” Jekyll couldn’t keep the question hiding behind his teeth, and he turned to Mr. Pennebrygg with weary suspicion glinting in his eyes. The Automatonatomist grinned at him.

“Come back here at seven o’clock tonight and you’ll find out.” Another weight.

Jekyll swallowed thickly, nodding once before leaving the room, Jasper in his wake.
-

“They’re probably gonna kill you, you know.”

Jekyll pinched the bridge of his nose, a long sigh exiting his lungs, leaving his bones fatigued and his nerves buzzing. He glanced up, glaring at his mirror.

“They’re not going to kill me, Hyde. They might be a bit far from normal, but they aren’t murderers. Don’t accuse my colleagues of such a heinous crime.”

Hyde grinned at him devilishly, resting his chin on his palm. His eyes glinted a devious lime green, teeth flashing in the glass’s shine.

“Well, if it’s not murder, then it’s certainly something that’s also quite foul. They might kick you out of the Society, then? You haven’t been on the best terms with them as of late, hm?” His voice was fluid and teasing, rolling the doctor’s worst fears around the tip of his tongue. Jekyll shuddered, looking away from the glass pointedly.

“It is a possibility.”

The laugh of his distorted reflection was ugly, sharp, filling up his head until it was all he could hear. He grimaced, clapping his hands over his ears until the noise died down.

“Come on, Doctor, lighten up a bit! If you’re destined to be kicked out and left on the streets, you might as well enjoy a drink while you still can.” Hyde wiggled his eyebrows comically, pupils darting to the red, stagnant potion on his desk. “Although if you aren’t in the mood for wine, I have another idea…”

Jekyll groaned, sliding out of his chair and turning away from the mirror, pacing up and down the floor. Hyde made a sound of contempt, and Jekyll ignored him, running his fingers through his hair.

“What in the world,” Jekyll muttered to himself, “Could they possibly be planning?”

“Well, at the top of the list is-”

“I wasn’t asking you, Hyde.”

The shadow in the glass pouted, slinking into the corner of Jekyll’s eyes, staying in his sight but out of reach, away from comprehension, teasing his vision. Teasing him. Driving him mad. Jekyll tightened his fists until his nails nicked his palms, exasperation flooding his veins. Hyde grinned at this, elated as ever to run the doctor thin. He spoke again, his voice an echoing hiss, reverberating in his skull.

“So, Doc, what exactly do you think they found out about you?”

Jekyll paused his pacing, the meaning in Hyde’s words resonating within his bones. He looked over his shoulder after a fraction of a moment, the room feeling abruptly empty, much more exposing than a moment ago. He couldn’t help but shiver- he felt vulnerable in this vacancy. Hyde had made his home in the mirror once more, leaning against the desk casually, a smirk spreading from ear to ear.

His shoulders felt heavy, heavier than moments before, straining under the pressure of so many distressing incidents.

Jekyll knew he shouldn’t respond to this devil on his shoulder, but his words were ideas, his ideas were corrosive, and this detriment was addicting. Listening to Hyde would mean furthering his unnecessary worries, letting this demon corrupt him, twist him into knots. Hyde would win if he asked.

But Jekyll was so weak.

Hyde always seemed to win.

“What could they possibly know?”

Hyde grinned.
-

Jekyll’s hand was suspended over the doorknob, unsure and unsteady. It was almost seven, and Jekyll should be entering Rachel’s room any minute now. He could hear voices inside, talking and laughing- more people than just Mr. Pennebrygg. Many more people.

Why was everyone here?

He took in a deep breath, ignoring the jeers and taunts of Hyde inside his head. There was only one way to find out what was going on, and that was to enter the room.

He took a deep breath and opened the door.

The chatter died down, and Jekyll blinked, taking in the sight before him. The Lodgers were all sitting cross-legged on the ground in a lively circle, surrounding the very machine that he had seen clasped between Mr. Pennebrygg’s hands just hours before. They turned to him, smiles wide and excited.

“Dr. Jay! You came!” Rachel sprung up from the circle, rushing over to greet the confused Jekyll. She beamed at him and tugged his sleeve, gesturing for him to join her in this cultish gathering. His eyebrows knit together as he sat beside her, arms crossed protectively over his core.

“What’s going on here?”

“Truth or dare! We gathered as many Lodgers as we could- save Hyde and Lanyon. Mr. Pennebrygg even made a lie detector for us!” Mrs. Cantilupe chirped, clapping her hands together in excitement. The words took a moment to process in Jekyll’s brain, but when they did, he couldn’t hide his relief.

“You invited me here to play truth or dare?” The Lodgers all nodded, completely unaware of the strife they had caused their founder. He looked at each of them, perplexed, trying to wrap his head around the notion that he had been pulling his hair out over absolutely nothing. Finally, he smiled.

“I’m in.” The Lodgers cheered, elation bubbling up in the room. Jekyll’s heart warmed- he had no idea that they would be so excited to include him in one of their activities. He knew game nights were common in the society, but he had always been too busy with paperwork to attend. He hadn’t thought that they might’ve actually wanted him there.

“Truth or dare with Henry Jekyll! Boy, is this gonna be fun or what? Who knew that the Great Scientist would be interested in such meaningless games?” Mr. Tweedy joked, elbowing Jekyll’s arm, who smirked in return.

“You’re laughing now, but I think you’ve forgotten that the game hasn’t yet started.”

“Oh, I’m shivering in my boots.”

“I wish we’d have thought to invite Mr. Hyde. Think of how fun this would be with him around!” Mr. Archer laughed, turning to Jekyll. “Where is he, anyway?” The scientist stiffened slightly.

“Hell if I know. He’s always running off without telling me.” He was cut off by an ear shattering alarm, and he turned quickly to find the source of the noise.

The lie detector was throwing a fit in the middle of the circle, blaring alarms and flashing bright red lights in a frenzied fashion as it tossed itself to and fro on the floor. Jekyll froze, eyes wide. Mr. Pennebrygg scrambled to reset the thing, muttering curses under his breath as he struggled to get a hold of the hysterical machine. When he finally turned it off, everyone’s gazes shifted to Jekyll, who was slowly pulling his hands away from his ears. Finally, Rachel spoke up.

“So… where’s Master Hyde?” The words resonated in the room, emphatic in the wake of the deafening noise. Jekyll let out a noiseless laugh, anxiety mounting in his chest.

“I didn’t know you had turned it on yet.”

“Answer the question.”

“It’s really not that big of a deal-”

“If it’s not that big of a deal, why did you lie about it?” Rachel was staring him dead in the eyes, her intensity making Jekyll’s fingertips buzz nervously. He looked at the other Lodgers- they were confused and shocked, but most of them were more curious than anything. That wasn’t great. None of this was.

Jekyll had seriously messed up.

An imaginary weight dropped once more, and he cringed underneath its strain.

He cleared his throat and took a breath, collecting himself. If his unease was discernible, they would know he had something to be afraid of. A secret he couldn’t spill.

And if they knew there was something he couldn’t tell them, they would almost certainly ask about it in their game of truth or dare.

“My apologies. I lied because it is something I’m not able to tell you. Mr. Hyde will be away for a while due to reasons I cannot share- it’s a confidential matter.”

The Lodgers pouted, annoyed that they had been lied to and offended that he wouldn’t tell them the reason behind his fib. However, the excitement for the game was still alive, and although Rachel seemed put-out, they quickly started to play. Miss Ito stood, clearing her throat before beginning to explain the rules.

“Listen up, everyone. Due to our last… unfortunate game of Twister, we have a few new regulations.” The group groaned collectively, sparking amusement in Jekyll. He caught sight of Rachel out of the corner of his eye and jolted- she had her arms crossed over her chest, a dark scowl painting her face. She was glaring right at him. He smiled weakly, and she mouthed four words at him slowly, exaggerating each syllable.

“What are you hiding?”

Jekyll turned away wordlessly, pulling his knees up to his chest. He needed to find a way out of this. He had not thought that he would paint himself in a suspicious, secretive light this early on in the game- they hadn’t even started playing yet. He needed an excuse, an alibi, a way to leave before things got ugly. Before he fell to pieces. Before he would be forced to watch his world decay around him. Before- and pardon his vulgar language- everything went to shit.

But wait- he couldn’t just leave. The Lodgers would suspect him, and his secret would be confirmed. They would perceive with certainty that he was hiding something, and knowing them and their curiosity, they would do anything to drag it out of him. Not only this, but he had a reputation to maintain! They had been so enthusiastic when he said he would join their game, he couldn’t just back out now! They wouldn’t trust him with any of their activities ever again. He couldn’t bear to disappoint them- he couldn’t bear to be a disappointment.

Maybe he would play for just a little while and find a way out during the game.

“First and foremost- if you’re in a position where your limbs are tangled with someone else’s, don’t move. That’s how muscles get pulled and bones get broken.” She frowned at Mr. Luckett, glancing down at his suspended arm. Jekyll’s jaw dropped at the sight of the sling.

Mr. Luckett let out a good natured chuckle, grinning at the doctor’s incredulous expression.

“It’s only a slight sprain, don’t worry. Twister just got a bit intense, that’s all.”

What kinds of games were these people playing?!

“Rule number two: if you are told to do something that you cannot or should not do, don’t do it. This should be common knowledge, but it seems that some of you lack the ability to think logically.” She raised an eyebrow, never breaking her gaze from the injured man.

“Oh, and keep in mind that anything too dangerous in this game is prohibited. Mr. Tweedy’s lab is far too close to Rachel’s kitchen for me to feel comfortable with anything explosive or flammable.” Jekyll interjected cheerfully. The Lodgers grumbled to one another, and the scientist rolled his eyes. God forbid anyone try to stay safe.

“Thank you, Dr. Jekyll. Lastly, I would like to explain the ground rules of the game. You can only do- at most- three truths or three dares in a row. After that, you have to switch to the other option. No hiding behind truth the whole time, this is supposed to be exciting.” Jekyll couldn’t help but think that picking truth would be far more dangerous than picking dare in his situation.

“Also, everyone has three chickens each. If there’s a secret you don’t want to reveal, or a dare you’re too scared to fulfill, you can use one of them. After all of them have been used, you either have to go through with it or forfeit the game.” Jekyll couldn’t afford to use his chickens, nor could he drop out of the game by force. If the Lodgers figured out exactly what kind of mystery he was suppressing, they had a good chance of discovering the twisted, morbid truth.

Miss Ito continued to read off the rules, and soon, the game was upon them. Mr. Bird started off by asking Miss Lavender about her boyfriend back at home, meaning that at the beginning of the game, the recent rumors that had been floated around the Society were already being questioned.

Jekyll shifted nervously as the game progressed- he hoped that a certain rumor wouldn’t be addressed.

Mr. Sinnet turned to him, a mischievous glint in his eye.

“Truth or dare, Dr. Jekyll.”

“Dare.” He didn’t allow even a slight hesitation between their words, not the smallest inclination showing consideration of the other option. The group let out a chorus of astonishment, unaware that their founder would pick such a dangerous option, annoyed that they couldn’t yet receive the answer to the most popular rumor in the Society. Little did they know, Jekyll was playing it safe. Only two more turns to go before he would be forced to choose his doom.

Two whole turns to formulate an escape plan.

“I dare you to consume one of your potions.”

Another weight dropped, and Jekyll reeled underneath the words. That one hit a little too close to home.

Jekyll flinched at the statement, a flash of panic seeping into his eyes, electrifying his muscles and rippling in shaky spasms across his body. Did he know? Mr. Sinnett looked clueless to his panic- no, just clueless in general. He was smiling like he had no idea what he’d just implied. But maybe he was acting, maybe this was all staged to force him into revealing his secret.

Wait, no. It couldn’t be that. He’d heard all about how terrible he was at charades.

Jekyll smiled at him, pushing himself off the ground with a bit of effort.

“Okay. Let’s go to my lab, then.”

A hiss tickled Jekyll’s ear as Hyde whispered in a menacing tone, voice dripping with poison.

“He knows. He knows about you, about me, about us. We’re doomed, Jekyll. He wouldn’t have said that for nothing. You have to do something about it, shut him up in some way. Make sure he doesn’t tell anyone else. If word gets out… we can say goodbye to the Society and greet Bethlam faster than you can down a glass of wine.” Jekyll’s eyes widened at the implication behind Hyde’s words, fingers beginning to tremble in fear of his own thoughts. How could he say something like that?! How dare he indicate he do something so ghastly, something so atrocious?

He opened the door to his lab wordlessly, shoving his shaking hands into his pockets, isolating them from watching eyes and prying minds. Hyde stalked him, lurking behind him as a shadow, chasing after him in the reflection of his mirror. He was out of control, going insane over an improbable suspicion, letting his hysteria consume him.

It was almost embarrassing to watch him worry himself to pieces like this- Hyde had stemmed from him, after all.

But he had no way to calm him down- he was in a room full of people watching his every move, waiting for him to choose a potion to drink. All he could do was try to ignore the distraught man glaring at him from across the room.

“Which one are you gonna drink, Doctor?” Jekyll turned, a shiny smile painting his face with false colors. He held a small bottle of gleaming, golden liquid up where everyone in the room could see, the potion producing a faint glow that illuminated the darkened space. Miss Lavender let out an audible gasp, and he chuckled, absorbing the awe and wonder from the room. He never had the chance to show off his work anymore- the unsaid praise felt nice. Really nice. It almost made him miss the days when he had nothing to hide.

“This is a liveliness potion- an anti-exhaustion serum, if you will. It helps keep me awake and energized when I lack sleep.”

“Or you could just take a nap.” Miss Ito muttered. Jekyll laughed nervously and uncorked the bottle, downing it in one swallow. He washed out the container thoroughly before drying it and setting it down. Turning back to the group, he clapped his hands together.

“Okay everyone, back to Rachel’s kitchen we go.”

The group turned and ambled back to their previous spot, Jekyll sighing in reprieve as he went. Hyde had gone quiet, pacified after realizing that they weren’t in immediate danger. Jekyll was almost relieved at the dare- it had been a while since he had last gotten any rest.

They sat back down in the circle, and the game seemed to go smoothly from there. Jekyll had his plan all figured out- he would complete the next two dares and answer one truth to refrain from acting suspicious. Then, he would excuse himself from the game, using an imaginary meeting with Robert as an excuse. It was the perfect plan- practically foolproof.

“Truth or Dare, Dr. Jekyll.” Jekyll turned to see Dr. Helsby grinning at him, a devious glint in his eye. A shudder overcame him at the sight of his mischievous expression- what did he have hidden up his sleeve?

“Dare.”

“I dare you to let us look through that little diary you had sitting on the table in your lab.” Good grief, he couldn’t catch a break today, could he? His pulse seemed to hesitate, his breath sputtering. He couldn’t let the Lodgers see that notebook, his lab reports- all of them- were written on those pages! Hyde growled behind him, and Jekyll could feel his returned anxiety rolling off him in waves.

“It’s not a diary, it’s a journal. I record all of my experiments in it, not my emotions or the events of my day. There’s a possibility that a few of you would find it extremely boring.” Well yes, of course there was a possibility that one or two of them would be disinterested if they read it. That didn’t mean that the possibility of that happening was high or even remotely likely.

“I still want to read it.”

Of course he did.

“Then I change my answer,” Jekyll stated, shifting uncomfortably, smile pulling itself unnaturally wide, “I pick truth. In order to keep the game fun.” The last statement was tacked on in a panicked attempt to give reasoning for altering his choice, and everyone in the room could hear the inaccuracy in his words. However, the accursed lie detector stayed quiet, fooled once more. The game would no longer be fun for him if they found out his secret- it wasn’t quite a lie. Just a nudge away from the truth.

“Sounds like a diary to me. But fine. If you wish to change your answer, then I will ask you a question.” The man was grinning from ear to ear, looking worryingly proud of himself.

Dr. Helsby had set this up in order to make him choose truth, there was no doubt about it.

“So. My question is… are you and Hyde…” Helsby wiggled his eyebrows. Yep, there it was. Of course he would ask this- he was the one who had started the rumor, after all. Jekyll shuddered, waves of disgust rolling over him. Hyde laughed maniacally behind him, finding amusement in his repulsion. The rest of the room seemed to giggle along with him, making Jekyll’s face burn an impressive shade of scarlet.

“Excuse me?”

“You heard me.”

“No. Mr. Hyde and I are not a ‘thing’. We never were, and we never will be. I find that question quite distasteful, Doctor.” He cringed as the entire room turned towards the lie detector, unconvinced by his words. There was no way that everybody thought that he and Hyde were dating!

His embarrassment was evident, and his ego was shattered.

“Wow. So you two really aren’t together, are you? Then what kind of relationship do you have?” Mr. Pennebrygg stated, incredulity clear on his face. Jekyll opened his mouth to speak. The lie detector started to smoke, and he closed his mouth again.

In that moment he promised Hyde that once he was free, he would have full permission to smash the damned thing.

“That’s a question for a different truth.”

The room groaned. Before he could continue the game, however, the door opened. Jekyll’s heart dropped at the sight of a very confused Robert Lanyon. His one chance at escape had just entered the room.

It couldn’t be possible for the world to hate him this much.

Another weight, then another. The pressure hit him like a truck, and he faltered under the impact, his smile flickering as it began to lose its shine.

Lanyon’s brow furrowed, unsure of why everyone was gathered in one spot, sitting on the floor in an ominous circle. He looked out of place, unsure of exactly what was going on. His surprise grew when his gaze landed on Jekyll, clearly not expecting his friend to be a part of the Lodger’s somewhat worrying antics. He cleared his throat nervously.

“What are you guys doing?”

“Truth or dare!” Mr. Doddle chirped. “Would you care to join?”

Lanyon looked confused for a moment, then nodded once.

“Sure. It’s not like I have anything else to do.”

And thus, Henry Jekyll’s fate was sealed.

He sighed and moved over for his friend, who sat beside him. Jekyll gave him a tired smile, no longer sure of how he was supposed to get himself out of this mess, stress devouring his insides. He could practically hear as Hyde tried- and failed- to smack his head on the wall behind him.

“So, where did you leave off?”

“Dr. Jekyll just finished his turn! He informed us that he isn’t actually dating Mr. Hyde- I still can’t wrap my head around it.” Mrs. Cantilupe giggled, hiding her mouth behind her hand. Lanyon raised an eyebrow. Jekyll leaned his head back, rubbing the bridge of his nose, expression saturated with pain.

“That’s enough of this foolishness. Robert, truth or dare.”

“Dare.”

“I dare you to pour everyone a drink. I’d appreciate it if you would open the bottle of wine I have stored in my quarters, if you don’t mind.” Robert groaned, bringing himself to his feet.

“Reduced to a maid, am I? Goodness, I just sat down.” His voice carried a joke, and Jekyll laughed slightly, smile dim and eyes lined. Lanyon seemed to notice the pressure he was under, and surprise washed over him. Jekyll never showed stress until it broke him- until the moment where it had either all been solved or all gone to shit, Jekyll kept a large, shiny grin plastered on his face. Only after would you see the mess it had made of him.

He said nothing and left to retrieve the drinks.

While he was gone, the room descended into chatter, scattered conversations turning to aggravating noise and overpowering clamor. Rachel scooted over to sit beside him, and he winced at the determination in her face.

“I never knew how much of a liar you were, Dr. Jay.”

Jekyll glanced uneasily at the infernal lie detector. It seemed to taunt him, ridiculing him as he struggled to get himself out of this mess with complete honesty. Oh, how he longed to just escape this room and hide himself away. Sighing, he turned back to Rachel.

“My work requires confidentiality.”

“You’re hiding something. There’s something going on between you and Master Hyde, and I swear on my grave that I will figure it out!” A fire lit in her eyes, the heat in her voice sending a chill up Jekyll’s spine.

“You won’t.”

“I will. I already know where I’ll find my answer. And if you won’t tell me what’s going on with you two, I’ll be forced to take matters into my own hands.” Jekyll froze.

“What?”

The door opened, and Rachel got up, dusting off her dress before heading over to her previous spot. Lanyon walked in, handing the Lodgers their drinks. Yet another imaginary weight dropped onto Jekyll’s back- what did Rachel figure out? Jekyll took his glass of wine with trembling fingers, struggling to still the frenzied drumming of his heart and unable to negate the effects of its frenetic beat. His friend sat next to him.

“You look like a sinner in church.” Lanyon hissed into his ear. Jekyll looked at him for a moment, then composed himself.

“I haven't the faintest idea of what you mean.”

Robert raised an eyebrow before sighing, shaking his head slightly. He glanced around the room, arms crossed.

“Mr. Griffin, truth or dare?” Mr. Griffin clicked his tongue, pushing up his glasses.

“Truth.”

“Are you an albino, or is the rumor false and you’re just really pale?”

“Of course I’m albino, isn’t it obvious? Wow, you would think that a friend of the doctor’s would be a little more brainy.” He growled, and the room began to snicker at his unwarranted outburst. Lanyon rolled his eyes. Griffin sighed, and to Jekyll’s surprise, turned towards him.

“Truth or dare, Dr. Jekyll.”

“I- you- I just went!”

“And I’m picking you again. That’s how the game works.” Jekyll laughed in disbelief, blinking quickly as his stomach began to twist. He couldn’t catch a break, could he?

“Fine. Dare.”

“I dare you to pick truth for the next three rounds.”

Another weight fell like a brick, knocking the air out of Jekyll’s lungs. He began to splinter under the pressure, fractures splitting like a spider web across his face, peeling back his smile to reveal something much uglier underneath. Anger had kindled behind his teeth, and he was getting light headed from inhaling so much smoke. Why couldn’t they just leave him alone? Why couldn’t he retire from this ghastly game? With each awful thought that surfaced behind his eyes the burden on his back seemed to increase. With a thin, painted smile, he nodded.

“Look at his face! Is it really so hard to be honest, Jekyll?” Dr. Helsby taunted, unaware that he was meddling with an unstable man, a temperamental reaction, a hazardous experiment. Jekyll felt disconnected from his body, watching himself succumb to resentment. He took a breath, trying to rid his lungs of sparks, drawing in more soot.

“Truth or dare, Helsby.”

“Dare.”

“I dare you to be quiet until somebody calls on you.” The room erupted in laughter, and Jekyll crossed his arms with a smirk, raising his eyebrow at a swelling Helsby.

“What’s all this with Henry being dishonest?” Lanyon asked, and Jekyll tipped his head back, groaning.

“He made the lie detector go off before the game even started, and he’s been death-staring at it ever since. Not to mention, he’s trying so hard to avoid picking truth. He’s obviously hiding something.” Rachel spoke up, glaring at Jekyll. “And it’s definitely something to do with Master Hyde.”

Jekyll felt sick.

“I thought you guys said they weren’t dating.” Lanyon said, voice tight.

“We aren’t! Helsby, pick somebody. Write it on a piece of paper or something.” The room went quiet as Rachel retrieved a notepad for the doctor, who rummaged in his pockets to find a pen. He scribbled frantically on the paper before shoving it underneath Jekyll’s nose. The doctor took the notepad and read the almost illegibly scrawled words aloud, eyebrows knit together.

“Truth or truth, Dr. Jekyll.” Jekyll looked up, exasperated, not trying to hide the annoyance that was clear on his face in the slightest. “This shouldn’t be allowed. Give someone else a chance to play.”

“Actually, Dr. Jay, I want to hear how you’ll answer his question. You seem like you have a lot to hide.” Jekyll turned to her, pain flashing across his splitting face. He had never been so close to giving up on his facade before, he had never been so close to snapping. He had never been this close. And Rachel was enjoying it! All of the bloody Lodgers were enjoying it. Hell, even Hyde was enjoying it- well, that wasn’t that surprising. He wanted to smack the shadow and inform him that if he’s found out, they’re both getting sent to Bethlam where he’ll never be able to taste the smoky air of the London night ever again. But everyone was there, watching him, waiting for him to slip up. He’d have to sit there and listen to Hyde taunt him all night long just because he didn’t understand the gravity of the situation.

“Fine. What’s the question?” Helsby opened his mouth, but was cut off by Jekyll shoving the paper back in his hands. He scowled at him darkly before writing. After he finished, Jekyll read aloud once more.

“‘What is your relationship with Hyde’? Oh, I should have seen this one coming.” He did see it coming. The words were already formulated, waiting on the tip of his tongue to be spoken. He sighed once more, leaning back as he glanced up thoughtfully at the ceiling.

“We’re very close. He helps me out by getting me to relax and I let him have his fun. It’s… a bit like a symbiotic relationship, I would say.” Hyde exhaled a low laugh into his ear, and he shuddered at the grating sound of his voice.

“Oh? We’re close now, Jekyll? What happened to all the times you’ve forced me back into your head? What about all the times you restrict my fun to make it follow your rules? I wouldn’t say we’re close, I would say you’re a dictator. Symbiotic relationship my ass.” Jekyll let the words bounce off of him, unaffected. He was just trying to rile him up, get him heated in front of all the Lodgers. And he knew his hypothesis was correct when Hyde growled at the silence and slunk back into his shadow.

Hyde was getting predictable. While that was a good thing for the current situation, it was really starting to make Jekyll feel quite boring.

The Lodgers looked content with his answer, and he passed the next question off to Jasper. Jasper answered without breaking a sweat, then turned to Rachel. Jekyll froze. Right. Of course he would pick Rachel to go next, what else should he expect?

Rachel completed her dare- she made cookie dough for everyone to eat- and faced Jekyll, who met her gaze with tired, tortured eyes. She was taken aback by his inability to hide his exhaustion, but the fire quickly returned to her eyes.

“Dr. Jay, truth or truth.”

“I guess I have to pick truth, don’t I?” Rachel nodded wickedly. Jekyll smiled wearily, and she wrapped her arms across her chest, a serious expression shaping her face. It was alien, unnatural to see her so vicious, but considering her determination, it was an emotion that was bound to reveal itself sooner or later.

“What are you hiding?”

“I choose to use my chicken.” Her jaw dropped, and the room began to whisper.

“What? You can’t do that!”

“I most certainly can. Ask Miss Ito- didn’t you say each person gets three chickens, Virginia?” She nodded solemnly, and Jekyll grinned.

“See? Don’t worry, I’m not hiding anything dangerous- at least not something that poses a threat to any of you. It’s a classified matter.”

“Everything’s a classified matter with you! I want to know what’s going on so I can make sure that Master Hyde isn’t in any trouble! I didn’t think you were a liar, Dr. Jay. I didn’t think you would lie to me.” She looked hurt, betrayed, and a bout of self loathing overcame the doctor. He knew that she didn’t deserve to be misled, but did he have any other choice?

“I… don’t enjoy lying to you, Rachel. I’m just in a situation where I cannot tell you the truth. So please, I beg you, give it a rest.” She was unsure and unwilling, but she couldn’t hide the sympathy that flashed across her face.

“Fine. What’s your biggest fear?”

Oh. She actually listened to him. He blinked in surprise before clearing his throat.

“Oh, um… being sent to Bethlam, I suppose?” That was a typical fear, right? Nobody would find it odd that he wouldn’t want to be forced into an asylum, right? This wouldn’t give him away, right?

Right?

“Hey Doc, you’re so on edge, I can practically see you sweat at such a harmless question. Loosen up, or your worst fear will come true. And you don’t want that, do you?” Hyde snickered, the sudden noise like ice inside his ears, and he flinched. He could feel Hyde’s beady eyes burning into the back of his neck, he could feel himself cracking underneath his gaze. Hyde was breaking him. The Lodgers were breaking him. But why was he breaking?

All he had to do was continue the ruse that he had always been so careful to keep stable. He never found so much trouble in doing so.

So why was this so difficult? Why were the Lodgers succeeding?

Why was he failing?

“Why would you be sent to Bethlam?” Lanyon cocked his head, brow furrowed. The few minutes he had spent in this room bore down on him- he was ready to leave. He didn’t quite understand this group of people, and Jekyll would find some humor in his confusion if it wasn’t for the terrible position he was in. He silently cursed Lanyon for continuing his suffering, palms beginning to sweat.

“I didn’t say that it’s likely I would go, I just wouldn’t enjoy spending time there.”

“Well, I wouldn’t think anyone would. Is there a particular reason for why it’s your worst fear, though? It’s not like you’re crazy, or something.”

An imaginary weight dropped between his limbs, crushing his lungs. Then another, then another. He couldn’t breathe. He was so tired of this, this questioning, this wariness, this meddlesome curiosity that nipped at his heels. They had no idea of the weight he carried on his shoulders, they couldn’t imagine the heft of the secret he bore. They didn’t know it, but they were eagerly prodding at the key to ruining his life, the way to grant his worst fear.

His lips trembled, and he pressed them together tightly to keep himself from lashing out at his friend, barely able to contain himself.

“I don’t think there needs to be a reason for my fear to be what it is.”

“You’re making me think that you have done something to get you locked up in the looney bin, Jekyll.” Mr. Archer snickered, elbowing Mr. Bird. “Has the Great Good Doctor done something that’s just a touch… mad?”

He sounded like Hyde.

Jekyll felt something inside him snap.

“Of course not! I would never-”

He was interrupted by an enthusiastic siren, and he clapped his hands over his ears, tinny voice blaring behind his eyes and bouncing around his skull, the echo lingering in his throat. He wanted to wail along with it, wished to succumb to the panic and melt down in an identical manner as the damned machine. Everyone huddled together to escape the intrusive noise as Mr. Pennebrygg scrambled once more to turn off the lie detector.

Somehow, the silence that followed was much, much louder. Jekyll drew his hands back from his ears and pinched the bridge of his nose, headache creeping behind his temples.

“Okay, fine. Maybe I’ve done something that the public wouldn’t consider… normal. But they think every scientist that graces the earth is mad! They’re all itching for every chance they get to lock us up, it’s not that huge of a feat.”

“Henry, nobody said anything about the public. He just asked if you had done anything mad.” Lanyon’s voice was soft, and when Jekyll lifted his gaze to meet him, he looked… scared? Unsure. Wary.

“Well then, I guess the answer to that would be yes.” Hyde cackled behind him, and Jekyll bit his lip to refrain from flinching. Lanyon’s eyes widened, and the doctor averted his shameful gaze.

“Since when have you been so sloppy, Doc? It’s only a matter of time before they figure you out, before they figure us out. You’re going to get your precious reputation ruined, you’re going to get yourself kicked out of this silly institution of yours. Everything you’ve worked so hard for will be washed down the drain in a moment’s notice. Look at what you’ve done, Jekyll. You’ve ruined everything.”

He was bluffing, he must be. Just half an hour ago, he was tearing himself into pieces over the possibility of a spilled secret, he wouldn’t be so calm. He wouldn’t be. Hyde was just messing with him, trying to get him to break.

He had to be.

Jekyll felt himself crumble under the weight of the atmosphere, and he choked as his chest gave out, as his throat closed behind his words. Hyde knew what he was doing to him, no matter how hard Jekyll tried to seem unaffected.

“Well then… what did you do?”

“Truth or dare, Dr. Maijabi.”

“Dr. Jay!” Jekyll turned to look at the distressed Rachel, exasperation flooding his features.

“It’s not my turn anymore. If you want to call on me later in the game, go ahead.”

“Then pause the game for a moment! I need to make sure that Master Hyde is safe!”

Wait, what? Why would she think of Hyde? Did he accidentally let something slip that he shouldn’t have? His perplexion was clear, and she fidgeted nervously.

“Does this thing you’ve done somehow involve Master Hyde? You said he was off doing something confidential- is he at any risk? You wouldn’t put him in danger, would you?”

Jesus Christ, he couldn’t get a break, could he?

“Don’t worry about him, Rachel. He’s not doing anything threatening at the moment, and I have no plans to put him in an unsavoury situation. That’s not to say that he won’t somehow get himself wrapped up in something he shouldn’t, though- he has a talent for that.” Rachel glanced at the lie detector, and he sighed audibly. She turned sheepishly back to him, not quite consoled but no longer in a state of panic.

His head was swimming- he could barely remember who he had previously called on. Everything had collapsed over him, and he couldn’t navigate his way out of the mess he was buried under. He needed to lie down, he needed to seclude himself from these prying eyes and curious tongues.

He needed to breathe, but there was no space for air in this room.

He stared wordlessly at the floor, eyes glazing over. He was beginning to shut down, unable to shatter more than he already had before falling apart completely.

“What did you do, Henry?” Robert hissed, and Jekyll blinked quickly.

“Did it have anything to do with Hyde?”

“Why did you keep it from us? We’re all mad here.”

“We’re not mad, Sinnett, we’re rogue.”

“Ah, same thing. He’s the one who said he did something mad in the first place.”

“Tell us!”

Jekyll stood, dusting off his lap with trembling hands and panicked eyes. He turned to the group, heart unsteady, limbs shaking slightly.

“I’m not feeling well, I’m going to lie down for a bit. Have fun with the game.” He turned around and made his way towards the door, ignoring the protests and complaints behind him. However, Rachel said something that made him freeze in place.

“Dr. Jay, if you won’t tell me what’s going on or how Master Hyde is involved in this, I’m going to find out for myself.”

He turned around quickly, eyes landing on a small book grasped between Rachel’s hands. He stopped in his tracks, heart halting for a moment before picking up its pace, faster and faster, until it felt like it would beat right out of his chest. That was his lab notebook. He recorded his experiments in it, and he knew that about half of its contents had something to do with Hyde. She must have stolen it while they were in his lab.

He couldn’t let her read that.

“Rachel, please put that down.”

“Not until you tell me what’s going on. I need to make sure you haven’t done anything stupid, I need to know if Master Hyde is safe. You’ve done something that could get you thrown in an asylum, and I just know that it has something to do with Edward. Either tell me what’s going on, or I’ll read it myself.”

“That’s just my lab notebook, Rachel. Give it back to me.”

“Does it have anything to do with this secret of yours?”

Jekyll didn’t answer. She raised an eyebrow and clutched it tighter to her chest.

“Tell me or I’ll read it.”

Since when was Rachel the type of girl to threaten him? Oh, who was he kidding. She always was.

He watched in horror as she slid her thumb underneath the front cover.

His heart was silent- had his pulse stopped or was it too fast for him to hear?

She began to open it.

He went numb.

The notebook opened fully, revealing the first page, where he had written his name and the date in neat font.

Something inside him snapped.

A fire blazed up to his eyes, seizing his whole body with a fit of emotion. Jekyll stormed over to Rachel, flinging the book from her hands with unforeseen mania, leaving her bewildered as the book fell over his shoulder. He stared at her for a moment, chest heaving. She opened her mouth once before closing it, swallowing thickly. The silence in the room was almost overwhelming. Finally she spoke in a meek tone, voice trembling.

“Dr. Jay… your eyes…”

The fury ebbed, and he watched in horror as the reflection of his eyes in Rachel’s dilated pupils faded from bright green to a comfortable maroon.

He stared at her, aghast and repulsed by himself. How had Hyde done that? How had he let Hyde do that? He could have hurt her. He could have done something that he would never be able to take back, all because he wasn’t in control.

But what if she figured it out? She was friends with Hyde, she was bound to know what color his eyes were.

Jekyll was trapped.

“I… sincerely apologize. Something came over me, I…” He gulped. “I think I need to get some rest.” Rachel nodded slowly, body still frozen in shock. He stooped down to pick up his discarded notebook, which had conveniently opened to a classified experiment when it fell. Noiselessly, he exited the room, leaving an uncomfortable silence in his wake.
-

Jekyll closed his door and pressed his throbbing head against the wood, taking in a deep breath. The room was quiet, too quiet, so quiet that the silence pressed into his ears until they popped.

The world was at a standstill.

Finally, Jekyll whirled around to face his mirror, slamming his fist against the door as he turned.

“Hyde, what the hell?!”

His reflection was distorted, a different face than the one peering into the glass. Hyde shrank away from him, eyes wide.

“She was going to read the journal, what else was I supposed to do? Stand by and watch it happen? Like hell I’d do that! Why do you even leave that thing laying around, anyway?”

“I wasn’t the one who left it out, you were! You used it as scrap paper in order to draw some extremely impossible anatomic models, remember? I can’t believe you thought any of this was a good idea. I didn’t think that you’d make me violently attack your best friend! That gave us away more than anything. Rachel’s a bright girl, I would be surprised if she didn’t figure it out already.” He flung himself into his chair, despair rolling over him in desolate, destructive waves. His shoulders shook as he buried his face in his arms, hunched over his desk. He could feel the panic as it dawned on Hyde, dragging them both to the ground.

“What do we do, Mr. Good Doctor? If you’re so superior to me, you must have a plan all ready and formulated. What now?” Hyde could barely conceal his hysteria, masking his question with ugly, pointed words. Jekyll let out a cry of contempt, raising his head from the desk.

“I don’t know, Hyde. I don’t know what to do, okay? I don’t always have a plan for everything, especially not this. You ruined this for us. You got too cocky and made everything fall to pieces. How will I ever keep this Society running if the public finds out about us, finds out that I’m not as perfect and proper as they think I am? What happens when they find out that I’m you? Well, I can guarantee you one thing, Edward Hyde. We will be greeting Moreau sooner than either of us would like. And you can say goodbye to your beloved London Night- you’re not going to be seeing it again for a long, long time.”

Hyde’s eyes glowed a vicious green as he growled, voice starting low in his throat before increasing intensity. He rammed his fists against the glass, so hard that Jekyll almost leapt to keep it upright. The phantom surged from the mirror, palms outstretched for his other half, teeth bared as his rage swept the room.

“They’re not taking my freedom from me, Jekyll! Do something. Do something right now, or I’ll make you! Go down and explain to them, tell them this was all a fluke, that you’re feeling ill. Make an excuse, make three. Fix this mess you made.”

Jekyll stood, meeting Hyde’s eyes with terrifying ferocity, and the smaller man flinched back.

“The mess I made? The mess I made?! Hyde, the only one here making messes is you. I’m forced, day after day, to clean up after you, to make sure everything you break is fixed. None of those messes were caused by me, and nor was this. This was all your doing, Hyde. And if it wasn’t for our unpleasant circumstances, I would have the right mind to leave you by yourself to fix this alone. Don’t blame me for something you caused, Hyde. You did this all on your own.”

Hyde brought his forehead to Jekyll’s, eyes staring deep into Jekyll’s skull.

“I am you.”

The low snarl came from Jekyll’s own lips.

He staggered back, bringing his hand to his mouth. Silence strung between them, Hyde’s irises burning behind the doctor’s eyelids.

A heartbeat passed.

Two.

Three.

“How did you do that?” Jekyll couldn’t mask the panic that crept into his words, breath shaky and voice breaking. Hyde smirked, resting his hands on his hips. “Tell me. How did you do that?!”

The door swung open, and a horde of people fell inside the room, yelping in surprise as they tumbled over one another in an uncoordinated flow. They untangled their limbs in a clumsy manner and stood, a plethora of emotions painted on their faces. Jekyll could spot surprise, fear, apology- were they listening to him through the door?

“What are you all doing here?” He spoke, voice surprisingly level for someone so frantic. Lanyon looked away, unable to meet Jekyll’s eyes. Rachel stepped forward, arms crossed tightly.

“I came to say I was sorry for how I acted, it wasn’t fair to go through your stuff like that…”

“I accept your apology, but I have a feeling the reason you’re here isn’t limited to that. I don’t see why everyone else would need to accompany you to my quarters.” He turned to his friend, who was still avoiding his gaze. Something twisted inside him, and he spoke once more in a soft, trembling tone.

“Were you all spying on me?”

Slowly, the Lodgers nodded in a silent chorus, and Jekyll let out an unenthusiastic laugh, sitting back down in his chair, leaning back in wicked astonishment. The room was quiet, too quiet.

“For how long?”

“Long enough.” Lanyon said, voice monotone and empty. Jekyll sighed, pulse quickening and breathing shallow. He was beginning to feel lightheaded- this had to be a dream. If this was real… it couldn’t be real. It couldn’t be. Finally, Lanyon looked at him, and the anxiety in his pupils just worked to bring dread to the pit of the doctor’s stomach.

“That is an enormous breach of privacy.”

“Dr. Jay, can you please explain to us what’s going on? I want to help you, we all do- but we can’t if you won’t talk to us.”

Jekyll closed his eyes, light flickering like stars behind his eyelids, temples throbbing painfully. The panic swelled in the pits of his ribcage, expanding and suppressing his heart, his lungs. This was it, this was the end.

“What do you want me to tell you?”

“Everything.”

“You’re not going to believe me. You’re going to think I’m mad.”

“I won’t.” Lanyon said firmly, and Jekyll flinched under his resolute words. The Lodgers murmured in agreement, urging him to commence his explanation. He didn’t believe them. But he had to, didn’t he? For his own sake, he had to believe them when they said they would regard his confession as truth. The doctor deflated, unable to lie any longer. If they wanted to know so badly, he would tell them. They had already overheard enough to have him thrown in Bethlam, anyway.

But still, after this many years of excessive deception and flourishing anxiety, he wasn’t quite ready to tell the truth. This would hurt, much more than he could ever imagine.

But he had to.

Jekyll took a breath and began his story.

Chapter Text

“Uno!” Dr. Helsby announced, setting a yellow three down in the discard pile. The smug grin he wore squirmed underneath Jekyll's skin, igniting flames of fury throughout his body.

“That grisly, fetid, atrocious piece of cow shit! Tell him to go fuck himself, Jekyll.” The blond yelped, stamping his misty feet on the ground. He looked to the doctor expectantly, who snorted and turned towards the contemptuous Helsby.

“Hyde tells you to go fuck yourself, Helsby.” His level voice contrasted remarkably with his appalling words, expression sweet and unnerving. The Lodgers around him sputtered, choking on their own bewilderment. Hyde cackled at the aghast expression on the other doctor’s face, and Jekyll couldn’t help but join in the laughter.

“Tell Hyde to cleanse his mouth with soap.”

“Hyde thinks that’s your job- he says you smell like damp socks.”

“I did not!” Hyde hollered. “Stop impersonating me! This is identity theft!”

“Hyde, this is the furthest thing from identity theft. Do you know what identity theft is?” The phantom clicked his tongue, turning away from the doctor. Helsby cleared his throat.

“So… you’re telling me that it wasn’t Hyde who insulted me? It was you, Dr. Jekyll?” He exclaimed, bringing a grin to Jekyll’s face. He leaned in closer to Helsby, expression angelic and demeanor warm. The other doctor leaned back to keep their foreheads from bumping against one another, unsure of exactly why Jekyll was acting the way he was.

“Maybe you shouldn’t play uno if you can’t take a small jab.” Jekyll purred, pulling away from the perplexed Helsby. The round had already gotten back to him, so he plucked a plus four from his hand and set it down, smiling sweetly at the disgruntled Helsby, who moved to pick up the extra cards with a scowl. Hyde laughed maniacally, shouting some choice words in Helsby’s direction.

“Uh oh, Jekyll’s lying again- committing identity theft this time! Better get out the lie detector, Pennebrygg.” Mr. Archer laughed. Jekyll shuddered, waves of repulsion flowing from his core to the tips of his fingers.

“Does nobody here know what identity theft is? And I thought Hyde smashed that damned thing.” The entire room giggled at his distaste for the detector, and Mr. Pennebrygg shrugged.

“I can always make another.”

“Don’t do that unless you want that one ruined as well. Just… some words of advice.”

Eventually, the game ended, and nobody could be angry at the outcome- Mr. Doddle had won. If someone more competitive had won there would have been much more outrage, but since it was the sweet Mr. Doddle, everyone kept their mouths shut. Mr. Bird collected the disbanded cards, and the rest of the room erupted into chatter. Jekyll stood, clapping his hands together resolutely.

“Thank you for inviting me to play with you once more, but I must be going. I have a meeting with Robert soon, and I shouldn’t be late.”

“Do you think you’ll be able to join us for our next game? We’ll be playing Never Have I Ever.” Miss Lavender offered, voice bright. Jekyll smiled uneasily.

“Thank you for the invitation, but I think I should sit that one out.” Miss Lavender's eyes widened in realization, and the Lodgers began to laugh as the doctor left the room. He shut the door behind him, the light waning and atmosphere thickening as he cut himself off from the Lodger’s bright jubilation. His stomach twisted itself into knots, breath shaky and unsure as he approached his quarters.

He hadn’t seen Robert since the explanation.

Lanyon had left with glazed over eyes and a vacant expression, unsure what to make of everything. He had said he needed some time to process, some space to come to terms with the story he had just been told. This made sense- Jekyll couldn’t blame him. It was surprising, and the shock of finding out that your friend had kept this sort of secret for years with no plans to tell the truth must have been jarring.

But that just made this first meeting much more terrifying.

He wondered how Lanyon would react to seeing him. Would he even show? Lanyon wasn’t the kind of friend to just leave him hanging, but at the same time, he had never been in a situation quite like this. What if he needed more time apart? What if he quit the Society? What if he never wanted to see him again?

“Woah there, Doc. You’ve spiraled so many times this past week that it’s starting to get redundant. Man up- it’s just Lanyon. Who cares if he leaves, anyway?” After a moment of silence, Hyde sighed. “He wouldn’t leave you, Jekyll. Stop worrying, it’s embarrassing.” Jekyll exhaled in the shape of a laugh, glancing at his shadow out of the corner of his eye.

“You’re not one for pep talks, Hyde.” The smaller man crossed his arms, huffing in indignation.

“I’m the best at giving pep talks! Just because I’ve never done it before doesn’t mean that I’m not the most excellent at it! I may be vindictive and depraved, the evil that lurks in the dark and haunts the innocent, but a good villain needs to be charismatic and benignant! My pep talks are prodigious, just you see!”

And so Hyde continued to give Jekyll a pep talk all the way back to his room.

When Jekyll finally made it to his room, he was at the end of his rope. Not only was he extremely stressed about Lanyon, but he also had a chattering, strangely positive Hyde on his hands.

Just when he thought that this day couldn’t possibly get any weirder, Lanyon burst through his doors, striding into the room like he owned the place. Jekyll raised an eyebrow at him as he made a beeline for his desk, sitting down on the counter and ignoring the painfully vacant chair.

“Henry, I need you to come with me to the party my father is hosting tonight.” Lanyon rested his elbows on his legs and leaned forward as he spoke, voice exasperated and eyes alight. “I have to go and there’s no way I’m going without a friend.”

“See, Doc, I told you he wouldn’t just up and leave. Look, he’s even inviting you to a party! I knew you were dim for worrying. What a shame- I had hoped he would buzz off already.” Jekyll swatted the air over his shoulder without breaking Lanyon’s gaze, Hyde squawking in an extremely undignified manner behind him.

“Of course. What sort of attire is recommended?” His friend smiled toothily at him, leaning back as he scanned him up and down with his eyes.

“You know that suit I got you for your thirtieth birthday?”

“Anything I should wear with it?”

“Those gold cufflinks would match wonderfully.”

“Fantastic.” The two grinned at each other for a moment before Lanyon straightened up with a sigh.

“I was so worried that I would have to go alone. Those parties are stupendously boring, I don’t understand how you seem to enjoy them so much.” Jekyll laughed at his friend’s annoyance, walking over to the desk and sitting beside him.

“What can I say, I hate to pass up the chance of advertising the exhibition.”

“I noticed. Do you spend every waking hour working on the exhibition, or do you dream of it, too?”

“You say that like I sleep.” He snorted, Lanyon’s face falling.

“Henry.” He clicked his tongue in disapproval, voice dripping in displeasure. Jekyll’s throat closed up, and he swallowed thickly, trying his best to ease his shaking, sweaty palms.

“So… are we just going to ignore the short, blond elephant in the room, or…?”

“Hey, who are you calling fat?” Hyde snarled, and any trace of joking disappeared from Lanyon’s face. He took a deep breath, opening his mouth before thinking better of it and pressing his lips tightly together. He looked at Jekyll, pity seeping from his expression, drowning Jekyll. He didn’t want Lanyon’s pity, he didn’t care for his compassion. He just wanted things to be normal between them- and Lanyon was never sympathetic.

“I wish you had told me about everything before you created him. I would’ve tried my best to help you- I didn’t know you felt like… that.” Jekyll looked pointedly away, balling up his fists until his nails bit into his palms.

“I didn’t think I could. You’ve never been a ‘feelings’ type of guy, Lanyon. You’ve said it yourself- emotions are gross and you hate dealing with them.” Lanyon threw up his hands in exasperation, frustration clear on his face.

“I still would’ve tried to help you! You’re my friend, Henry. I wouldn’t just let you deal with that by yourself.”

“Well, we can’t go back in time, now can we? What do we do now?” Silence stretched between them, and the two shifted uncomfortably as they each waited for the other to speak.

“Is there anything that really needs to be done? I mean, you’re still my best friend, I just… know a bit more about you now.” Lanyon tried, bringing some humor into his voice. “Is there anything you want me to do?” Jekyll looked over to him, gratitude flooding his features.

“I just want everything to go back to normal.” Lanyon smiled at him, eyes weary and soft.

“Okay. I’m not pretending like any of this didn’t happen, though. You need to stop bottling things up, it’s not good for you.” Jekyll sighed, heart much lighter than it was thirty minutes ago.

This seemed too good to be true. He was so sure that Lanyon would be frightened beyond repair, he was just waiting for him to leave and never come back. But here he was, sitting with him on his desk, speaking to him normally like the world hadn’t just fallen to pieces. Putting the fragments back together.

His life had collapsed around him, but everything was still okay.

He smiled back at his friend, much more at ease than he had been in years.

“Okay. Let’s get ready for the party now, shall we?”