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When Darcy Olsson was eight years old, her teacher taught the class a saying:
"Those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind."
It had stayed close to her heart throughout her sixteen years of life, but it had done especially so at thirteen, when she’d come out to a few of her closest friends.
The first to know was her best friend, Tara Jones. After befriending each other in the auditions for the school’s orchestra, the two girls became thick as thieves. The pair were inseparable, and after being locked in an audition room for an hour in year nine, it became apparent as to the reason why.
Most of her close friends welcomed her new identity with open arms, but a few less so. They sneered, called her names behind her back, judged her. But it was okay; because if they minded, they didn’t matter.
During the spring term of year nine she’d mustered up the courage to come out to her parents. They’d never seemed overly supportive of the queer community, but then again they’d never seemed against it. So when she’d decided she’d come out to her parents, she thoroughly prepared how she would tell them. She wrote a loose script with the help of her girlfriend, and rehearsed it over and over in the mirror of her room for a week.
And then, on one cool evening in April, she sat them down at the dining room table and told them. She kept it vague; how she’d known she’d liked girls for a few years now and that she was confident in her label of being a lesbian. How her best friend Tara wasn’t so much her friend, but her girlfriend of the last nine months.
It’d come out in an eager and anxious blurt, but once finished, she looked to her two parents with an optimistic hope that they'd accept her with open arms - just like Tara’s did.
But instead, she faced two sullen faces and a less than ideal response.
You’re only fourteen, Darcy, you’re far too young to know.
You’ll meet the right guy someday, don’t put yourself in a box.
Friendships can feel confusing - that doesn’t mean you’re ‘queer’.
After ten minutes more of the belittling she’d ran to her room, sobbing into the comfort of the soft pink bear known as Mr. Pinkie, who’d always leant his shoulder for as long as she could remember. And a few hours later, unable to stand being under the same roof of her so-called-parents, she slipped through the front door and into the darkness of the night.
Her bright green Crocs slapped against the pavement as she ran the journey to the Jones’ house, wiping the tears from her eyes for them to return only moments later.
She’d told herself that those who minded didn’t matter.
But her parents did matter.
She'd always loved her parents. Not in the way most people do, like the way Tara loved her parents, but in a way of an unconditional bond to the other - that at the end of the day blood was thicker than water.
But that was a load of bullshit.
She made her way to Somerset Lane with her green Croc’s giving her a blister and her eyes still pools of tears. She could see Mr. and Mrs. Jones in the window of the living room as she made her way up the drive, and the light of Tara’s room peeking through drawn curtains.
She softly opened the door of the porch, as if scared of being heard. Two knocks on the door and she took a step back, her legs jiggling with anxiety as she waited.
The door swung open to warm light and the kind face of Mrs. Jones – but it quickly turned to one of concern.
“Darcy?” She said, voice thick with worry. “Are you alright, sweetie?”
Darcy didn’t know what to do or say. But her face scrunched up and the tears were now a waterfall down her face, and she quickly felt a pair of sturdy arms wrap around her as she sobbed.
“It’s okay, honey,” The warm voice of Tara’s mother whispered as she stroked her hair. “it’s okay…”
The next thing Darcy heard was Tara's father calling her name up the stairs, a clambering of footsteps, and the gasp of her girlfriend.
The night was long, but the Jones' sat the sobbing girl down with a cup of tea and a blanket, before asking her what had happened. Darcy told them everything, blurting it out as she sobbed some more, whilst the two parents exchanged a concerned look with each other. They asked her if there was anything they could do for her, and through a blocked nose and sniffles she asked;
“Can I stay here tonight?”
Mrs. Jones assured her that she was more than welcome to, and swept her into another hug. The girl sobbed on her shoulder, her girlfriend softly stroking the hand she held with her thumb.
Mr. Jones called Darcy’s parents to let her know where she was and that she was safe, along with few strong words, whilst Mrs. Jones set up the bed in the spare room. Darcy was, understandably, tired from the ordeal, and was sent to bed with a few more motherly hugs and a goodnight kiss from her girlfriend.
In the morning, neither parent commented on the landing floorboards that had creaked with Tara’s weight at midnight, when she’d slid into the spare room to spend the night hugging her girlfriend close.
Since that night, it’d become a common occurrence for Darcy to spend a significant amount of her time outside of school at the Jones’ residence. There was always a spare place at the table for her, a motherly hug when needed, and terrible dad jokes to attempt to cheer her up. Darcy had always thought she’d known familial love until the Jones welcomed her into their home with open arms.
So after a partially harsh fight with her mother, it was no wonder Darcy was contemplating running there now.
She’d planned to dress up and meet the Paris gang at Tao’s for a movie marathon in costumes. But after the fight, she didn’t particularly feel up to the event. She felt like she’d just bring the group down, just like she'd been told her ‘sulking’ brought down her mother’s mood - although Darcy wasn’t sure you could call trying to ignore your mother after a homophobic remark ‘sulking.’
She sat on her bed, knees close to her chest and a blanket around her as she hugged Mr. Pinkie close. In her hands she held her phone, where she’d been messaging her girlfriend from for the last hour.
Tara had tried to get her to come along, to not let her parents bring her down - especially on her favourite night of the year! But Darcy was adamant she’d only bring the group's mood down - it was bad enough she’d already brought Tara down.
Darcy promised it was fine to go on ahead without her, that she could just watch movies at home. She tried to joke that it wasn’t like she was missing anything important, like Trick-or-Treating; her favourite part of the holiday.
Tara had teased her, saying they were fifteen - weren’t they too old to trick-or-treat? Darcy promptly shut down the absurd idea that one could be “too old” to trick-or-treat.
So now she sat, dressed in the costume she had already dressed up in. Although it wasn’t so much a costume, just a green tank top and a pair of comfortable jeans with vampire teeth - a low budget Marceline costume she’d planned to match with Tara’s own of Princess Bubblegum.
Oh well , she thought, there was always next year.
Her phone ding ’d, making her jump slightly.
Text from: Tararara, 6:28pm:
Come outside!!!
Darcy frowned at her phone, checking the time. It was almost half six - the film night at Tao’s had already begun. Why would she be here?
Darcy slid off the bed, quickly trotting down the stairs to open the front door, which revealed her girlfriend dressed in a shockingly pink dress, a huge smile on her face.
She felt like crap, but the sight brought a meek smile to her face, too.
“What are you doing here?” Darcy asked, eyes wide and confused.
“To get you, idiot!” Tara laughed. “We’re late. ”
“I told you I didn’t want to go to Tao’s.” Darcy said, eyes anxious.
Tara shook her head, a playful smile on her face. “Who said we’re going to Tao’s?”
Darcy’s eyes narrowed with pinched brows, her eyes questioning Tara. However, Tara’s mouth stayed zipped and instead, she walked a few paces down the path of Darcy’s front garden, waving her hand to indicate Darcy to follow her.
Intrigued, Darcy obliged, grabbing her coat from the peg beside the door and slipping on a pair of trainers. She followed her girlfriend's steps, shutting the door gently behind her, and caught up to Tara, who took her hand and gave it a squeeze.
“Where are we going?” Darcy asked as Tara swung the gate open, for them to walk through. As she turned the corner from the high hedges of her front garden, it was revealed.
“Surprise!” The chorus of her friends greeted her. They were all in their costume; Elle and Tao dressed in some arty film Tao had made them watch, Nick and Charlie in a pair of Mario costumes that were likely Charlie’s suggestion. The two boys were both hand-in-hand with a pumpkin, also known as Oliver Spring, and behind them, Isaac as Frodo Baggins and Sahar as someone Darcy could only recognise as a witch from that show Good Omens .
She felt the prick of tears at the surprise, her friends' loving faces welcoming. She was still confused – until Nick held out a soft black tote that the rest of her friends, too, held in their hands.
“Fancy Trick-Or-Treating?” He asked.
Darcy’s face lit up to absolute glee, whipping her head around to Tara besides her, who had slick expressions written all over it; evidently the conductor of the surprise.
“Happy Halloween!” She said, and gently pecked a kiss to Darcy’s cheek. Darcy’s smile widened, a light blush falling on her face.
“I wanna gooo!” The high pitched cries of Olly Spring moaned. “All the best chocolate will be gone!”
The group laughed, and Nick and Charlie led the way with the eager boy dragging them along. Darcy with her fingers still entwined with Tara’s willingly followed, her mood already lighter as she walked down the road surrounded by her friends.
—
An hour later all their totes were filled with assortments of sweets, and Darcy had already made a start on snacking on her own collection. The gang had garnered questionable looks from the neighbours whose doors they’d knocked on, but they formulated a strategy that organised Olly to be at the front of the group every time. His cuteness was enough to divert the neighbours' attention from the gaggle of teenagers, and instead to the little face of Olly, the lisp he had thanks to a missing tooth only making him cuter.
“Thank you!” Olly’s sweet voice called at the last house they’d made their rounds to, and a sweet coo was replied from the residents as they waved goodbye to him from their door. They walked down the drive and began their journey back, the group buzzing with excitement and a slight sugar rush.
“I’d call that a success!” Isaac grinned, half way through a Milkyway bar. Charlie nodded at him as he began to unwrap a packet of Skittles for his younger brother, whose hands were held high as he impatiently tried to reach for them.
Tara turned to Darcy, her voice low. “The gang are going to head to Tao’s for a film, but if you’d want to head back to mine–”
“Nope, it’s fine!” Darcy cut her off, a smile on her face with a smudge of chocolate on her lip - not that she’d realise yet. “I wanna go.”
Her smile was confident and bright - a contrast to the one she’d had when Tara had met her an hour ago.
“Fab!” Tara smiled back, before licking the tip of her index finger and rubbing the smudge of chocolate off of Darcy’s lips.
“Hey!” Darcy laughed. “I was saving that for later!”
Tara rolled her eyes jokingly and Darcy poked her tongue out in response. The two girls' hands found each other’s, entangling their fingers with sweet smiles as they walked the remainder of the way to the Spring’s residence to drop Olly off.
Half an hour of walking across Rochester later, they found themselves at Tao’s house, where they were welcomed by Yan Xu. She greeted Elle with a hug before disappearing back upstairs, leaving the gang to take full reign of the family’s sitting room. Tao, Elle and Charlie wandered into the kitchen to make the group hot chocolates, and Tao instructed the six of them to try and work out how to do the simple task of loading Paranormal Activity onto their T.V.
“There’s six remotes!” Sahar exclaimed as she picked them up in her hands. “Who needs six remotes!? ”
Nick picked one up, inspecting it. Tara took another, and soon enough all of them were holding a remote, inspecting it for clues. Darcy shrugged and pressed the big, red button on the tip of hers. As she did the radio on the bookcase started the blare, and loudly so.
UPTOWN GIRL!
The group jumped in unison, and Darcy frantically pressed the red button again.
She’s been living in her uptown world!
“Darcy, turn it off!” Tara exclaimed.
I bet she’s never had a backstreet guy!
“I’m trying!” Darcy panicked, spamming the buttons a few more times before the room came to a still silence again. The group laughed, Darcy sighing in relief.
“Okay, so not that one.” Isaac chuckled and Darcy placed the remote back on the coffee table, sliding it away from her as if it was about to explode.
The group were now terrified of the remotes and decided to simply await the return of Tao to do the impossible task himself. He and Charlie return a few minutes later, with trays of mugs filled with steaming hot chocolate.
“Why did Uptown Girl start blasting?” Elle asked the group, a questionable frown on her face.
The group simultaneously pointed to Darcy’s direction, whose eyes widened in response.
“It’s not my fault you have a bazillion remotes!” She said, defensively. The group laughed in response, and Tao placed his tray of mugs on the coffee table, before picking up one of the remotes. As the TV flickered on Tao picked up a second remote and with the press of a few buttons, the DVD disc drive popped open. Tao wandered to it, picking up the Paranormal DVD and loaded the disk into it. He then picked up a third remote, changing the input of the TV to the DVD player.
The group watched in amazement of the wizardry it apparently took to do a seemingly, simple task. Once the film loaded up, they turned their attention to more important matters as they awaited Elle’s return: revealing their hauls.
Tote bags were upturned and an assortment of sweets and treats rained to the floor. Darcy brushed through her own pile to reveal her haul, and quickly picked out any strawberry flavoured sweets: Tara’s favourite. Once scooped into her hands, she turned to her left and sprinkled them over Tara’s pile.
Her girlfriend looked at her with a face of pure delight, a sweet expression upon her face.
“You didn’t have to!” Tara exclaimed.
“They’re your favourites!” Darcy argued, before her voice turned slightly shy. “And it’s a thank you. For tonight.”
Tara smiled sweetly and leant over to give her girlfriend a quick kiss. “You know I’d do anything for you, Darcy. Even if it only cheered you up slightly.”
“I’d say you were more than successful, then!” Darcy smiled. It was true; it was hard to imagine she’d been so blue earlier. But after the unexpected surprise of a trick-or-treat with her friends, she felt back to her usual chaotic self.
Tara linked her arm with Darcy’s and snuggled in close with her head on her shoulder. Elle then wandered through the door with bags of freshly popped popcorn, placing them on the coffee table.
“Ready?” Tao asked. The group nodded and hummed in agreement, and Nick reached from his place on the sofa to flick the light switch off.
The film wasn’t that bad; at least to Darcy’s standards - a few of the jumpscares got her, but that was about it. The same however could not be said for her girlfriend, who was huddling into her side, eyes daring to peep to the screen.
With every jumpscare Tara yelped, cuddling Darcy even tighter. Each time Darcy laughed; the kind that comes from deep within.
“It’s not funny!” Tara pleaded with a smile, but it only made Darcy laugh harder. Tara narrowed her eyes at her as she playfully jabbed an elbow into Darcy’s ribs. Darcy responded by using the hand that had been wrapped around Tara’s waist to tickle it, which prompted Tara to wiggle in response. Darcy laughed alongside Nick and Charlie, who witnessed the event unfold from the sofa above, where they sat.
“Shh!” Tao looked at the two girls with a stern expression. In sync, the two girls poked their tongue out at him. Tao rolled his eyes and focused back on the film, and the two girls silently laughed as Tara snuggled back into Darcy.
—
The night ended with a game of Scrabble between the group. The group split into four pairs: Tara and Nick, Tao and Sahar, Charlie and Elle, and Isaac and Darcy.
Isaac and Darcy had been stuck on a decent word to place, before Darcy eagerly began placing tiles on the board without consulting Isaac beforehand.
“Slengh!” Darcy announced as she placed the tiles with a light tap.
“Slengh isn’t a word, Darcy.” Tao said from across the board.
“Yes it is!” She debated.
“What does it mean, then?” Tao asked, unconvinced with an eyebrow raised.
“It means,” She said confidently. “When someone moves something really heavy. Like, with the slengh of a sword .”
Charlie and Elle giggled, and Tara shook her head trying not to laugh.
“Nuh-uh.” Tao said, swiping the tiles away from where they’d been placed. “No fake words!”
“It’s not a fake word!” Darcy pleaded.
“She’s right.” Nick said, nodding at her with a wink. “It’s a word.”
“Yeah!” Isaac joined in, a cheeky smile on his face. “It was mainly used in mediaeval literature, hence Darcy’s example with the sword.”
Tao looked around the group, eyes narrowed and unsure what to believe. But when everyone, including Elle agreed in unison, he shrugged. “Alright, I guess.”
Soft giggles were heard from around the group as he slid the tiles back into place.
Next to go were Tara and Nick, who were both giving each other a mischievous look.
“Fruwel.” Nick said, confident too, as he slid the tiles to come off the word frantic. “Oh, hey! Double word score!”
The whole group laughed, bellies clung to as they howled.
“Nicholas Nelson, pray tell me what Fruwel means.” Tao demanded, bluntly.
“It means–it’s–” Nick tried to compose himself through giggles. “–it’s the word you use when you harvest a vegetable!”
Tao sighed, and the room again fell into laughter.
The remainder of the game turned into making up fake words, and then trying to give them believable sounding explanations. Tao eventually caved in, even if it was a joking dig at his friend.
“Brobben.” He said as he placed the tiles down. “When your friends try to trick you into believing something untrue.”
“That’s actually a word!” Isaac exclaimed, with glee.
“It is!?” Tao asked, almost hopeful, failing to see the irony. The group collapsed into laughter once again, ending with Darcy drying tears of laughter from her eyes.
The game ended with Isaac and Darcy being crowned the winners; it became apparent that the combination of the Queen of chaos and the literature King were the perfect duo for winning made-up-word Scrabble.
Fifteen minutes later, Tara’s parents came by to pick her up.
“D’you want to be dropped home?” Tara asked, picking up her coat from the pegs in Tao’s hallway.
“Can I stay the night?” Darcy asked, eyes shy.
Tara smiled. “Of course!”
Darcy smiled one of relief, and after saying goodbye and thanking their friends for a lovely surprise, she followed Tara down the driveway to the car with the familiar silhouette of Mr. Jones. When the pair clambered in, Tara taking the passenger seat and Darcy the seat behind, he smiled a toothy grin to them.
“Alright, girls?” He asked, starting up the engine.
“Yup!” The girls responded in unison as they fiddled with the seatbelts in the dark.
“Did you have a good night?” He asked, flashing a smile to Darcy as he looked behind to reverse the vehicle.
“Yeah, it was lovely!” Tara said, and filled him in on the night. From the trick-or-treating and their strategy with Olly Spring, to the films, to the chaotic game of Scrabble. Tara’s dad listened as he drove, with the odd hum in agreement here and there. Darcy just stared out the window, listening to the radio as she watched the town blur past.
They pulled into the Jones’ drive, Tara skipped to the door and unlocked it with her key. They took their shoes off, and soon joined Tara’s mother in the kitchen. Tara began to fill her mother in about their night, repeating everything she’d only just told her father about twenty minutes prior. Her mum listened attentively as she stood over a sink of soapy water, finishing the chore of washing up dishes.
Darcy navigated her way to the cupboard that contained their collection of glasses, picking out a larger one before walking to the tap to fill it up with water. Tara’s mother moved out the way to give Darcy room to use the tap, still looking at her daughter as she paid attention to the story she was being told. Darcy stepped back after filling the glass, smiling at Tara's mother, who smiled back at her.
Darcy wandered to lean against a counter as she sipped her water and listened along to the story. Once she’d finished, she quickly excused herself to fetch something from another room. Mrs. Jones turned to Darcy, a smile on her face.
“Did you have a nice night?” She asked. “Tara said you’d gotten into a fight with your parents again.”
It’d be easy to mistake her for prying, if not for her voice that was full of genuine concern.
“Yeah, we did.” Darcy said, meekly.
“Was it about…” Mrs. Jones trailed off, and Darcy nodded.
“Well,” Tara’s mother continued. “You know you’re welcome here any time.”
Darcy smiled, graciously. “Thank you, Mrs. Jones.”
The mother shook her head. “No need for that, dear. Please call me Irie; you’re much less of a guest in this house than you are family.”
Darcy wasn’t sure what to say, but instead showed her gratitude with a smile and a nod.
“Whatever happens, dear, you must know you always have a home here. Ethan and I are happy to help in whatever way we can.”
Darcy’s heart warmed, the words heavy but filled with love. “Thanks, Irie.”
The woman fondly pinched Darcy’s cheek, before Tara came back through the kitchen door.
“Do we have a spare towel for Darcy?” She asked.
“In the laundry basket, in the living room.” Her mother instructed. Tara shot her mum a thankful smile, before looking at her girlfriend. “Wanna go to sleep?”
Darcy nodded.
“Alright," Tara smiled to her mum. “g’night, mum!”
“Goodnight, Irie.” Darcy followed.
Irie smiled fondly at the two girls. “Goodnight, dears.”
They quickly jogged up the stairs and into Tara’s room. Being together for some time now, Tara’s parents saw no issue with the two girls squeezing into Tara’s single bed for the night. The only issue they seemed to have was on the occasion the two could be heard giggling into the early hours of the morning, but even then it was only a soft knock on the door as a reminder to keep quiet.
Once changed into pyjamas, Darcy borrowing a pair and Tara fixed her hair into a cap, they curled under the duvet and balanced Tara’s laptop playing Adventure Time on their legs.
“Did you have a good Halloween?” Tara whispered.
Darcy nodded, eagerly. “The best.”
Tara squeezed their entwined hands and tilted her head forward to give her girlfriend a kiss. “I’m glad.”
“Does this mean we can go trick-or-treating next year?” Darcy asked, eyes excited.
“We’ll be seventeen next year!” Tara said. “We’ll definitely be too old then!”
Darcy scrunched up her face. “No we won't!”
Tara shook her head at her. “Yes we will!”
“Excuse me, but as long as we’re together, we’re going trick-or-treating. Even when we’re eighty-five!”
“With our little zimmer frames?” Tara asked.
Darcy tried to muffle her laugh. “Yeah!”
Tara looked at her girlfriend in the dark, eyes soft and warm. “I love you so much.”
Darcy grinned. “I love you too, Jonesy.”
Darcy pecked her girlfriend on the cheek before nestling to rest on her chest. For a night that had started full of anger and sadness, it’d ended with so much love.
Darcy had always reminded herself that those who mind don't matter. So if her family didn’t accept her for who she was, she didn’t mind. Because family wasn’t who you came from, but rather those who fill your life with kindness and endless support. Those who sit with you in pain, and laugh with you in joy. And, most of all, family is those who love you unconditionally.
And after tonight, Darcy Olsson realised she’d found her family; and they were all that mattered.