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Charlie was nervous and was probably overthinking this.
Of course, it could be argued that he was always nervous and overthinking things. Nervous was his natural state, after all. But that day, he was even more nervous. Like a wave in his usual sea of nerves, it was rising higher and higher, waiting to crash against the rocks.
The day was November 11th, and Charlie was going to confess.
He was going to walk up with a pack of pepero and offer it to the object of his affection, and finally confess his feelings. It was kind of corny, but corny was all Charlie had to fall back on. This corny idea had to work.
It was a staple in the kdramas that he watched when every other show got old for him. From there he learned that Koreans called the 11th of November Pepero Day — a day when someone would confess to another person, even wordlessly, by simply giving them pepero. They wouldn’t include it so much in kdramas if it didn’t work at least some of the time. All Charlie could do was hope this would be one of those times.
Waves of nerves still sloshed around inside him. That one big wave kept getting higher; like the gravitational pull of the full moon was right above it, and getting closer.
Now that’s a good analogy.
Nicholas Nelson sat on the other side of the couch, engrossed in whatever film was on the telly. He’d been eating something, and a few crumbs were still stuck by his lips. Charlie was trying very hard not to stare at them — not the crumbs, and definitely not the lips — but his eyes kept going back again and again.
How could he still be attractive like this? Nick Nelson was a giant rugby idiot who’s eating right now and couldn’t even bother wiping his face properly. Why was Charlie so completely gone for that stupid face?
Sure, he was good-looking; mature, handsome face with brown eyes that sparkled with softness and kindness, lips with one side naturally turned upwards in a lopsided smile, hair strawberry blond — that looked more ginger under certain lights — parted on the side causing a mop of his hair to slightly fall to the other side of his face which he had to brush his hand through to put back into place to showcase a wide, handsome forehead that Charlie wanted nothing more than to kiss all over—
Yeah, Charlie was completely gone.
But this pointless pining was going to end. That day, Charlie was going to confess. If Nick accepted, then perfect. If Nick rejected him, at least this whole thing would end and Charlie could move past it.
But he really hoped Nick wouldn’t reject him.
They were all gathered in the living room. Darcy was on the floor, Tara on the sofa seat behind him as they shared one bowl of popcorn. Charlie’s roommate and best friend Tao had Elle close; and by close meaning the two were curled up together on one single-seat sofa chair.
Elle was watching the film intently, but every once in a while Tao would take his eyes off the screen to sneak a glance at Elle, making sure she was having a good time. Charlie’s heart ached with envy. He wanted something cute and romantic like that.
Automatically, his eyes went to Nick and found Nick staring back at him. Charlie quickly looked away, heart thudding. When he risked another glance, he found Nick watching the screen once more. Charlie breathed a sigh of relief. Hopefully Nick didn’t think he was one of those weirdos who openly stared at other people. That wouldn’t be good, especially since this was the day Charlie was going to confess.
This was the day.
The thought of it was making him squirm, and suddenly he couldn’t just sit there anymore.
Charlie got up, maybe a little too hurriedly, because the others all turned to look at him. “I need to check on something,” he announced, which was true. Charlie was suddenly filled with the urge to check on the pepero he had hidden in his bedroom drawer. It didn’t matter that he had already made sure it was there in the morning, or just a few hours ago before everyone had come over. He still had to.
The others seemed to believe him, and went back to the film. Charlie thought he could feel Nick’s eyes on him as he left, but that was probably his imagination. That, and the nerves.
When he was safe and alone in his bedroom, Charlie took a deep breath. He had to steady himself. He wasn’t going to stutter or get choked up on his words when he confessed. He had to be calm and collected. He could do it. He was going to get a moment alone with Nick before he had to go home, and he was going to offer the pepero and his heart. Simple.
Charlie walked over to his bedside table and opened the second drawer, the one where he’d safely stowed his pepero—
And found it empty.
Charlie blinked in surprise. And then he closed the drawer, counted to five, and opened it again (silently hoping his eyesight was failing him or his drawer was actually made by a magician).
Still empty.
Panic rising in him, Charlie dropped to his knees and started rifling through the drawer. There was nothing in it; he’d emptied it out just to look more thoroughly. He opened the other drawers, thinking maybe he’d moved it and forgotten — nothing. A few notebooks, his journal, some stationery.
No pepero.
He tore through his closet, in his bookshelf. He looked through his bag, the pockets of the jeans and hoodie he’d worn to the store. He even got down on his knees and looked under the bed. Nothing.
No pepero.
Charlie stood up, ran his hands through his curls, trying to calm down. He could get through this. He was Charlie Spring, and he was going to confess today.
When he was sure he’d gotten his breathing under control, Charlie walked out of his bedroom. “Hey, guys,” he called, and to his own surprise, he sounded normal. “Some of my stuff’s been misplaced. Have any of you been in my bedroom?”
Darcy shook his head no. “Not me,” Tara answered.
“I’ve been with Elle since she came, and we haven’t gone in there,” said Tao. Elle just nodded at that, and went back to watching the film.
Which left only one person.
Nick shrugged and shook his head, without looking away from the telly. But Charlie could see it now — how he looked uncomfortable, almost nervous. Crumbs were still by his lips, glinting from the light of the screen.
Crumbs.
Anger rose in Charlie. “Nick,” he said, trying to keep his tone calm. “Do you mind if I have a word with you in private?”
“I’m kinda watching something here, Charlie,” Nick replied, still not looking at him.
“Just two minutes,” Charlie bargained, calm mask very close to cracking.
Nick let out a deep breath, but got up. He kept his eyes away from Charlie’s as he approached, and walked into the bedroom first. Charlie caught a glimpse of Tao’s warning look as he closed the door. But the time for warnings was over. Charlie was angry. This was supposed to be his opportunity to confess, and Nick had ruined it.
As soon as the door was properly closed, Charlie whipped around to face Nick. “You ate it.”
“Ate what?” Nick obviously tried to look innocent but did a miserable job at it.
“Don’t play dumb,” Charlie demanded, closing in on him. Nick backed away, looking genuinely scared for a moment, but Charlie moved even closer. “You broke into my bedroom and you ate it.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he insisted.
“You didn’t even bother wiping the crumbs off your face, you wanker!” Charlie yelled.
Instinctively Nick’s hand went to his face, and then his eyes widened when he realised he’d just admitted his own guilt. But instead of apologising like a regular person would, he had the nerve — the gall — to look defiant. “Okay, fine, maybe I ate it,” he admitted. “So what?”
“So what?” Charlie was in furious disbelief. “I invite you to my place, and you sneak into my room, rifle through my bedside table, and eat something I had obviously saved for later! How shameless can you be?”
“It’s not only your place, it’s Tao’s too,” Nick argued petulantly, raising his chin. “He’s the one who invited me. You never invite me anyway.”
“Because he didn’t know you were going to be stealing,” Charlie reasoned. “You are a thief, Nicholas Nelson.”
“I am not a thief,” Nick spat, outraged.
“Then what do you call breaking into someone’s room and eating their food?” Charlie demanded. “You actually looked through my things to find it.”
“I didn’t break into anywhere; you left the door open,” he clarified. “You left it on the bedside table where anybody could see it. You shouldn’t leave food out in the open like that.”
Charlie couldn’t remember if he’d put the pepero back in the drawer the last time he’d checked on it, and was too angry to think about it. “I didn’t know Tao had invited a thief into our flat,” he snapped. “Why did you eat it, Nick? Are you just that much of a knob?”
Nick’s face coloured. “No—”
“Then what?”
“I... I had a craving for chocolate—”
“That wasn’t even a chocolate-filled type,” Charlie cut him off, leaning in closer to glare. “You don’t even have a reason, do you? You just wanted to eat it so you did. You didn’t even care what I was going to do—”
“What were you going to do?” Nick asked suddenly, no longer on the back foot and glaring at Charlie with the same intensity. “You were going to confess with it, weren’t you? Like some stupid schoolgirl in one of those kdramas I know you’ve been spending so much time watching instead of noticing how—”
“So what if I was?” Charlie could feel his face heat up; from anger or embarrassment or both. “So what if I was, you prick?”
“Well now you can’t,” Nick shot back. “Now you can’t confess to anyone. Not to whichever dickhead you were going to confess to, who’s probably smart and good-looking like you, who doesn’t deserve you—”
“Why do you care so much anyway?” Charlie asked, barely registering Nick’s words.
Nick opened his mouth, and then closed it. His eyes widened as he stared at Charlie, frozen, and then he quickly turned away. “I don’t,” he said, looking flustered.
“No, why do you care who I confess to?” Charlie pushed. The anger dissipated even as he said it. Nick stood in front of him, shuffling and resolutely avoiding eye-contact, and the sight of him was enough to drive out all the anger.
“I told you, I don’t,” Nick repeated, but it came out barely more than a mumble. “You can confess to whoever you like, I don’t... I don’t care anyway.”
“I don’t have anything to confess with now,” he reminded Nick, staring at the taller boy, the way he chewed his lower lip, how he refused to look at him.
“Like you’d need anything anyway,” Nick muttered with a scoff, but there was something like a bitter smile there too. “You’re perfect. Whoever you’re going to confess to is the luckiest person on this Earth.” He scratched his neck awkwardly. “I don’t know why I even ate the stupid thing,” he admitted, barely loud enough for Charlie to hear. “It’s not like that would’ve stopped you, and it’s not like you’d…” He trailed off, sneaking a glance at Charlie and looking guilty, and absolutely adorable not unlike a kicked puppy.
That one single glance had Charlie’s heart thudding in his chest. “It… it bothered you,” he asked, and he could feel something burgeoning in his chest; something hopeful, “that I was going to confess to someone?”
Another glance, this one longer. And now Charlie could see that Nick’s face was red, the colour concentrated on his cheeks, decorating his constellation of freckles beautifully. “I’m sorry,” Nick finally said. “I’ll buy you another packet, and you can… you can give it to whoever you want.” He looked defeated.
Charlie took the plunge, feeling a surge of bravery and confidence. “He already ate it, though.”
Nick finally turned to look at him, confused. Charlie held that gaze, even as he felt his face turn hot. And then, slowly, realisation came to Nick’s face, and his eyes widened. “I am such an idiot,” he whispered.
It sounded so heartfelt that Charlie laughed. “I guess,” he said as he looked away, face still burning.
“You were all yelling at me,” Nick reminded him, still looking stunned. “And, like, proper angry. I… I never thought…”
“Yeah, you don’t do much of that,” Charlie teased with a light chuckle. If awkwardness could kill, Charlie would have died by now.
“So, I just have to make sure of this,” Nick started. “That… that pepero— that was for me?”
“Yes,” he answered, and now he couldn’t make eye-contact.
“Okay,” Nick said slowly. He took a step forward. “So the person you were going to confess to… was me.”
“Yes,” Charlie squeaked out in confirmation. Why was this so difficult?
“Okay, I think I got it now,” Nick replied. “I just have one more question.”
“Alright.” Charlie closed his eyes shut. His heart was pounding with Nick standing so close, knowing the truth.
“Is it too soon for me to kiss you?”
Charlie’s eyes flew open. Nick was standing right in front of him, looking at him with that sparkle in his beautiful brown eyes. And he was smiling, bright and shining.
“No,” Charlie answered almost too quickly.
And they kissed. It was chaste, soft and innocent, perfectly sweet. The sweetest thing Charlie had ever experienced.
Better than pepero.
When they parted, Nick just stared at Charlie, eyes sparkling, an even bigger smile on his handsome face. “I can’t believe that just happened,” he said, sounding breathless.
“Then let’s just make sure,” Charlie offered, finding more confidence, and he held Nick’s face in his hands and pulled him forward for another kiss.
Charlie walked out of the bedroom first with a still giggling Nick trailing right behind. He’d been doing that for awhile now, and no matter how much Charlie shushed him, he just didn’t stop.
The others were still gathered around the telly, the film just about to end. Charlie cleared his throat to get their attention. “So, guys,” he started. “I have something to say.”
“You finally confessed?” Darcy beat him to it, not looking away from the telly. “Good job. It’s about time you both got that sorted out.” Tara gave a little cheer of congratulations as she kept on watching the film.
“Congratulations, wish you two the best,” Elle said, still watching the screen. Tao nodded, eyes fixed on the telly as the final scene played out.
Charlie stared, openmouthed, as Nick burst out into laughter behind him. And then finally, he grinned. He turned around just as the last of Nick’s laughter died away into chuckles and locked eyes with him, both of them smiling at each other. Charlie leaned forward and kissed Nick, feeling his smile against his own.
It was November 11th, and everything was perfect.