Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Don’t you think this is a bit of a weird one?” Julia asked, raising her eyebrows as she brought her takeout cup to her lips.

Michelle inclined her head slightly at the younger woman. She wasn’t wrong, it was a bit of a weird one.

“I mean, when we come across unregistered kids, they’re normally, like, three or four at most,” Julia continued, “they don’t usually pop up as teenagers.”

“Our job is always the same, Jules, we work for CPS. We get a report, we investigate, we hand it on to the relevant case-worker. Same process, every time, however strange the report is.” Michelle smiled slightly at her younger co-worker, ignoring Julia’s raised eyebrows. With that, she grabbed her coat and headed out the office door. Julia trailed behind her.

“I’m just saying, when’s the last time you got a call from the hospital saying ‘we’ve got a patient who we’re treating, and every record says we’ve been treating them for a while, but no-one can remember him coming in.’ I mean, that’s got to be a first for you, right? However old you are?”

Michelle sighed. “For the last time, Jules. Just because I am older than you, does not mean I’m old. I’m forty-five, for God’s sake.”

“That’s old in my books.”

“Julia!”

Julia grumbled something at that point, but Michelle decided to ignore it. After all, she knew Julia was only joking. The woman was wonderful with kids, but she was god-awful with adults. It was like her ability to be polite disappeared out the window, the minute the person in front of her turned eighteen. The two of them stepped out of the office, and dashed over to the car and out of the pouring rain. Away from the downpour, Michelle plugged the address from the hospital records into the Satnav in the car, and set off down the street. Julia was still jabbering on about something beside her.

“—Where would they have even kept a random child for over a decade? What did they do, just lock him in the basement? Oh god, I forgot they could have totally locked him in the basement, I’m such a horrible person.”

Michelle glanced away from the road and over to her partner, taking in the horrified look on her face. Julia really did care about other people, even if sometimes she was truly terrible at showing it.

“The hospital said that other than the TBI they were treating him for he was in pretty good shape, maybe a little skinny but nothing concerning. That’s part of why they were surprised by the lack of records, I think” Michelle said, aiming for a reassuring tone.

“Oh.” Julia replied, relaxing back into the passenger seat, “probably not held in the basement then.”

“Probably not.”

The rest of the journey was completed in companionable silence, one that Michelle and Julia had perfected over five years of working together. The silence was only broken when the Satnav announced they had reached their destination, and Julia looked up at the building in front of them.

“Holy shit.” Julia muttered.

Michelle looked over to her partner, before following her gaze out to the building they’d arrived at. It was large and somewhat looming, an old Georgian manor building nestled between more modern shop fronts on each side. It was many times larger than the majority of apartments and houses Michelle and Julia usually visited, and it was clearly far more expensive. Michelle turned back to her partner, who was still staring at the building with a look of starstruck awe.

“Jules?” she asked, poking her partner lightly in the arm. Julia shook her head slightly, breaking out of her reverie, before turning to Michelle.

“What did the hospital say this kid’s name was?” Julia asked, effectively ignoring Michelle’s questioning look.

“Finn,” Michelle replied, “Finn Hargreeves. Why?”

Julia was muttering under her breath, not quite loud enough for Michelle to hear over the hum of the engine. Taking the keys out of the ignition, Michelle turned back to her partner.

“Jules, what is it?”

Julia sighed, rubbing a hand across her face.

“Okay, I’m going to out myself as a massive nerd here, but do you remember that guy who died recently, The billionaire? It was all over the news even though no-one had heard from him for years?”

“Yeah, Reginald something. Media went crazy over it.”

“Well, it was Reginald Hargreeves. As in, the Hargreeves children? The Umbrella Academy? You gotta remember them, yeah?”

Michelle racked her brains, a blurry memory appearing at the corner of her mind. Fifteen to twenty years ago, something like that, when she’d just moved to the city. She’d been so focused on raising her own little tyke she’d hardly paid attention to the world outside, but she did vaguely remember The Umbrella Academy. A bunch of kids adopted by a wacky billionaire to fight crime.

Wow, now she came to think about it, that was a red flag and a half, had CPS never investigated?

“I remember, sorta.” She replied, wondering where her colleague was going. Then it dawned on her. “You think this Finn is related to those Hargreeves?”

“Well,” Julia replied, “Seeing as we’re currently parked outside the old Umbrella Academy building, I’d say yes. That’s exactly what I think.”

Michelle hummed in response, not entirely sure what to say. With that, the two of them got out of the car, walking swiftly to the ornate door at the front of the building. Julia rang the bell, while Michelle stepped back slightly, happy for her partner to take the lead for now.

A few moments later, a beautiful and oddly familiar woman answered the door, dark hair in tight curls framing her face. Julia introduced the two of them to the woman, who responded with a stunning smile.

Then Michelle and Julia walked away, entirely unsure why they were out of the office to begin with.

A week later

“I’m telling you Michelle, it is no coincidence that the address we’ve got on record for this guy is the same place as The Umbrella Academy, and his last name is Hargreeves. This kid is related to one of them!”

“One of who?” Michelle replied, having only been half listening. Her mind was mostly occupied with a strange sense of déjà vu, that she could not shake however hard she tried.

“The Umbrella Academy? The six super children? Or seven I guess, there was the one that published that memoir a while back, but they didn’t fight crime so I’m not even sure if they count. Anyway, even then it would be six, because one of them disappeared. Didn’t one of them die as well? I think one of them might have died. Holy shit, that’s traumatic—”

“Jules?” Michelle said calmly, hoping to break Julia from her rant. It didn't work.

“—Who even is this kid? He can’t be one of their kids, the hospital said he’s at least twelve or thirteen, they’d have to have been born when the academy were no older than sixteen, seventeen? They were still super popular then, I’m sure the fans would have noticed if a baby had appeared. I mean, which one of them was going to have a kid? Klaus maybe, I’m sure I saw in the magazines that he was sneaking out all the time. I bet he could have gotten someone pregnant—”

“JULIA!”

Julia paused, mouth twisting into a sheepish smile.

“I’m rambling again, aren’t I?”

Michelle just nodded, a slight smile on her face. She didn’t mind really, Julia was great with kids, she just wasn’t good with adults.

Wait. Hadn’t they been through this once before? The déjà vu feeling that was overwhelming her was getting stronger and proving to be quite difficult to shake. Michelle was almost swamped with the sensation that they’d had their conversation before, even if she knew this was the first time they’d discussed Finn’s case. Trying to brush off the odd sensation, Michelle reached into the back of the car, pulling out her bag and notepad. With that, she turned to her partner.

“Okay, I need you to rein in the fangirl for a bit, Jules.” Michelle started. “We need to find out what’s going on with this kid. Find out if they’re safe and find out why the hell we’re only just hearing about them now. I don’t care what teenage scandal brought them into the world, CPS just cares about their wellbeing. Understood?

“Aye aye, Captain” Julia replied, giving Michelle a mock salute, before getting out of the car.

Michelle stilled for a moment, sighed, then did the same, pulling the door shut and clicking the key fob in her hand. The two of them walked up to the ornate front door to the academy, and Michelle rang the bell. A skinny man with long hair and smudged eyeliner answered. Weirdly, Michelle had been expecting a woman, possibly one with curly hair. She wasn’t sure why.

“Hello!” the man answered enthusiastically, sticking one of his hands up in a wave. The hand had ‘HELLO’ inked across it.

Michelle stepped forward slightly, spotting that her colleague was staring at the man in front of them with a mildly starstruck gaze. This was clearly one of the esteemed ‘Umbrella Academy’ then.

“Good morning, Sir. We’re calling from Child Protective Services. Can we speak to Finn please?”

“Who?” the man replied, a genuine look of confusion crossing his face, before it was replaced with one of sudden realization. “Oh! Finn! Our darling Finn, of course you can speak to the charming young man. Come on in!”

With that, he pulled the door wider and beckoned Michelle and Julia into the building. Michelle looked around the entrance hall. It was even grander than the outside of the building, with ornate pillars around the outside of the room, and a wide staircase, with a small hallway running down the side.

“So, did you find us okay?” the man said, looking a little awkward. “I guess the house is pretty big so it’s probably pretty easy to find on a map.”

“Oh yeah, well we just plugged it into the Satnav, you know how it is.” Jules replied.

“Oh, yeah. Of course.” The man said, looking a little unsure. Shutting the door behind him, the man beckoned them further into the entryway, before glancing down the small hallway.

“I’m just going to let Fi– Finn know he’s got visitors, can you stay here a second, and I’ll come back and grab you?”

Michelle nodded politely, and the man disappeared down the hallway. She looked over to Julia, who was staring straight up at the giant chandelier above her.

“Jules, will you stop gaping like a goldfish already?” Michelle whispered harshly.

“Sorry,” Jules replied, face sheepish again, “It’s just so huge.”

Michelle looked up at the chandelier. It was huge. Larger than any light fixture she’d ever seen before. There was no denying this entire house was expensive. Plus, it looked like it extended well beyond the size she’d estimated from the outside. The house likely took up most of the city block. Suddenly, it seemed more feasible that the family had hidden away a child for thirteen years.

“So, which one was that?” Michelle asked, voice low in case the man returned.

Julia’s eyes snapped away from the chandelier above them and onto Michelle’s.

“It looks like Klaus, ‘The Séance’. Although he’s looking a lot healthier than any time I saw anything about him in the news. Last anyone had heard, he was in rehab.”

“This is the one who you think might be the father?”

“Yeah well, it just makes the most sense. He was always the ‘bad boy’ of the group.”

The two of them were interrupted from any more speculation by the reappearance of Klaus. Michelle looked at him again, trying to spot any familiarity, but she didn’t recognise him at all. Even if she had been an avid follower of The Umbrella Academy, it had been more than a decade since most of them had been in the public eye.

“Our young Master Finn’s just along this way,” he said in a sing-song voice, as he led them down the hall, “I’d say he’s going to be happy to see you, but I don’t want to set expectations too high.”

Michelle glanced quickly at her co-worker, who shared a slightly bewildered look with her. Neither knew quite what to do with that statement. Still, this wouldn’t be the first time they’d been less than welcome in a home. Plastering a firm smile on her face, she answered Klaus.

“That’s understandable, Mr Hargreeves, we just want to have a quick chat with him, then we’ll hopefully be able to let you get on with your day. We just need him to answer a few questions, if that’s okay?”

Klaus stopped. Julia, who was still gaping at her surroundings, nearly ran straight into the back of him, but caught herself just in time. Michelle paused, unsure what was going on.

“You guys were sent by the hospital, right? That feels like it’s probably right.” Klaus said, the last bit more to himself than to the two women.

“The hospital asked us to check up on everything, yes. There seemed to be a few issues with the records.” Michelle replied, trying to keep things a little vague, it wouldn’t do any good for the family to get too defensive before CPS could confirm where the child had been all this time.

“Hmm, I bet there were,” Klaus muttered before raising his voice and continuing on, starting to walk down the hallway, “It’s just, I’m slightly surprised the hospital haven’t given you a few more details, that’s all.”

Klaus took them a set of stairs and then up another, onto the third floor. As he went to open a door handle, Michelle decided to question him.

“Is there something you think we should know, Mr Hargreeves?” she said, trying to keep her voice neutral.

“It’s just, Fi-Finn… Ah, it’s fine. You’ll be fine.”

With that, he opened the door, and gestured into the room.

“Uh, yeah. Have fun!” he said, walking quickly away.

Michelle sent a baffled look towards Klaus’s receding form, before peering through the now-open door and into a bedroom.

The room was a light green colour, but Michelle paid little attention to the layout or the furniture. She was entirely distracted by an abundance of chalk marks on every wall.

Numbers and symbols were in every space across the room, right up to the sloping ceilings, and right down to the baseboards. Michelle had studied math up to college, and considered herself quite good with calculations, but she had absolutely no idea where to begin with the equations in front of her.

“Can I help you?” came a voice from the corner of the room.

Michelle turned to spot a short man sat cross-legged on a single bed, a book in one hand.

Next to them, in a navy armchair, a skinny looking teenage boy was staring at Michelle and Julia. He looked very pissed off. He was a little terrifying actually, which was quite impressive considering Michelle was a fully-grown woman.

“Hi, my name is Michelle, and this is Julia. We’re here from CPS, did Mr Hargreeves let you know we’d come to speak to Finn?”

“Ahh.” The man on the bed replied, leaning back on his hands and nodding slightly, “So, that’s what he meant when he ran in here and said ‘the kiddie cops’ were coming. That makes a lot more sense now.”

Michelle shot a quick glance to Julia, The ‘kiddie cops’? That was a new one.

“Well,” Michelle replied, plastering another kind smile onto her face and turning to the teenager in the chair, “We’re from Child Protective Services. The hospital let us know there were some discrepancies in Finn’s records, so we thought we’d just pay you a quick visit, check everything’s alright. How are you doing Finn?”

The teenager, presumably Finn (as no-one had corrected Michelle so far), continued to scowl at her.

“Do you think you’d be willing to answer some questions?”

More scowling.

Smile faltering, Michelle turned to the man sat on the bed, asking whether they’d be willing to step out for a moment so they could speak to Finn alone. The man hesitated, looking over to the teenager, but Finn’s scowl lifted for just a moment, sending a small, wry smile to the man on the bed.

With that, the man stepped out of the room, leaving Finn, Julia and Michelle in the bedroom together. Michelle walked forward, perching on the edge of the bed, careful not to get to close to Finn. Finn just kept glaring at her, eyes jumping between Michelle and Julia, who was currently at the back of the room, looking at the equations on the wall.

“Hi Finn.” Michelle tried again, voice soft and calm, “Is it okay if we call you Finn? Is that what you like to be called?”

Finn continued to look back and forth between Michelle and Julia, before seemingly deciding neither of them were a threat and relaxing into the chair. He shifted slightly, stretching his legs a little before crossing one over the other. Michelle watched as he used his hands to ease his legs into position. She’d read in his file he was struggling with his co-ordination. Now she was meeting him in person it was easy to see, even in that small movement. Still, she didn’t say anything, giving the boy the space to answer her original question.

After a few more moments of silence, Michelle decided to try a different route.

“Are these equations yours, Finn? They look to be quite complex. Can you tell me a little about them?” she said, hoping to get him talking about an interest.

It was always harder with teenagers, they were always so much more reluctant to talk than the little ones. Unfortunately for Michelle, her idea wasn’t working, as Finn just continued to scowl at her. It was strangely impressive, Michelle hadn’t seen him blink yet.

Well, sweetness wasn’t working, neither was distraction. Michelle decided to get straight to the heart of the matter.

“Do you know why we’re here today, Finn?”

Silence. Michelle could see Julia in her peripheral vision, making her way to another wall full of chalk marks. She was looking at the wall above the bed now.

“We’re here to check in on you, because it looks like there might be some issues with your records. We couldn’t find a record of your birth, or any records of you before the hospital began treating your brain injury.”

She paused, giving Finn a moment to process what she was saying.

“We just want to help, Finn. If you need help. We want to make sure you’re safe, and you’re as healthy as can be, with parents or guardians to support you. After all, you’re a teenager now, but you’re still a child, and children deserve to be looked after.”

Finn didn’t say anything, but he did scoff at Michelle’s statement, a small smile appearing on his face. It wasn’t a kind smile, it was an expression of disbelief.

Michelle’s heart dropped. If Finn couldn’t believe CPS were there to help, that was for one of two reasons. It could have been that he felt genuinely safe and well-loved, and didn’t understand why CPS would had ever thought anything else.

Unfortunately, it was far more likely that Finn had experienced a less than pleasant childhood. That kind of disbelieving response came from someone who had already endured hardships, and couldn’t believe someone would possibly be trying to rescue them now. Michelle really hoped it was the former, but her instincts told her it was the latter, and in most cases she trusted those instincts.

Still, Finn said nothing, and Michelle had to do her best not to scream in frustration. She couldn’t do anything without a confession, or a hint of a confession, or at least something from the child. At this rate, She was going to be walking out of the room with no new information, and no idea if the child was truly safe, but she’d no other choice but to walk away.

Michelle looked over to her colleague, hoping she had some idea about how to get Finn to open up. Unfortunately for Michelle, Julia was still staring at the walls, arms crossed and a look of thought on her face. Michelle sighed, gearing herself up to ask another question. Instead, Julia spoke.

“Who’s Milton Greene?” she asked, turning away from the walls and looking at the teenager in the armchair.

Michelle raised a subtle eyebrow at her colleague, unwilling to call her out in public, but unsure where she was going. Looking back to Finn, his face had changed expression, now one of deep concentration, He appeared to be running his tongue across his teeth, as if trying to figure something out. After a moment, he spoke, his voice quiet and stilted.

“He’s a gardener.” Finn said, pausing for a moment before adding “I think.”

Hallelujah! Michelle swore never to question Julia’s techniques again (although she knew that promise would almost certainly be broken within the hour.)

“Oh yeah?” Julia replied, “Do you know him? I never could deal with gardening myself, too many insects. Worms, cockroaches, I’m not good with them. What about you, Finn?”

Michelle watched another expression cross Finn’s face, but she wasn’t sure how to describe it. He suddenly seemed… old. Tired. More tired than a typical teenager, even more than a typical teenager with the fatigue that comes from a brain injury. Michelle felt that same weight in her gut as she’d felt before. This boy had been through something. Something horrendous, that had aged him far more than he deserved. She just wasn’t sure what.

And, whether she liked it or not, she didn’t have enough evidence to change anything right now. She didn’t know if taking Finn from this setting would be better for him or worse. Finn was well presented, clean and relatively healthy. Those around him seemed kind enough, if a little weird. Something wasn’t right, but the last thing she wanted to do was take the kid away from those who genuinely cared for him.

Really, she just needed to know where the hell this kid had come from. Then they could figure it out, figure out if it was a case of working through some administration, or if he was better off far away from his current carers. Unfortunately for her, she needed Finn to talk if she was going to figure any of that out, and Julia’s breakthrough hadn’t lasted. The teenager had slipped back behind the brick wall of his well-placed scowl.

“Okay Finn, We’ve got one last question, then we’ll leave you alone.” She said, looking forward to getting out from under the boy’s gaze. “You are a minor, and so therefore you need a guardian. Can you please tell us who your guardian is? We’ll need to speak to them before we leave.”

“I’m not,” Finn began, stuttering slightly, “I don’t—I don’t have a…”

He trailed off, clearly frustrated but unable to finish his sentence. Julia interrupted, a kind smile on her face.

“You’re clearly a mature individual, we just need to know to tick the box. It’s just a formality, yeah?”

The scowl dropped a little, but Finn gave them nothing. Michelle’s frustration was rising. It was so hard to help a kid who wouldn’t help themselves. She knew it was her job, but it drove her a little insane every single time.

“Finn, please. We’re going to be investigating anyway, we can’t leave a child with unclear records and no obvious legal guardian. Now, I’ve met at least two adults today, are either of those your legal guardian?”

A small smile appeared on Finn’s face. He took a moment to compose himself, once again running his tongue across his teeth. Michelle waited, hoping that the boy would, just this once, give her a straight answer.

“Fuck off.”

Well, that hope went soaring off into the distance, never to be seen again.

Michelle sighed, picking up her bag and looking over to Julia, who was grabbing hers as well. They weren’t getting anywhere. Reaching over and opening the door, she was greeted by the two adults she’d met earlier. They were whispering to each other, but Michelle didn’t catch much. She did think she heard Klaus mutter something along the lines of “What the fuck is a Satnav?”

She glanced back at Finn, giving him a quick good-bye, before pulling the door shut gently and turning to the men in front of her.

“Finn is quite a—”

“Bastard?” Klaus interrupted.

“Klaus!” said the smaller man, looking slightly horrified. Then he paused, a thoughtful look on his face, “he is being a bit of more of a dickhead than usual today.”

“Oh, I bet you he told them to ‘fuck off’, he’s been using that at least once a day since he figured that one out. Did you see the way the speech therapist just stormed right out?” Klaus replied, clapping his hands together in glee.

Julia interrupted the two of them, a slightly confused look on her face.

“I’m sorry, but only siblings talk like that. Is Finn your brother?"

"Oh yeah the darling boy is one of the brood, can’t you see the family resemblance?”  Klaus answered enthusiastically.

“Klaus, we’re adopted.” The smaller man said, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh I know, Viktor. Could you imagine if we were actually related? If we looked like Dad? " Or even worse, if we all looked like Luther? I would not rock the blonde hair thing.”

Michelle looked back and forth between the two of them, before deciding she’d had enough. She needed a break from this family, a chance to catch her breath and figure out what she was dealing with.

“So, Viktor… Hargreeves? Is that your name?” She asked, getting brief nod from the smaller man, “If you’re all siblings, who is Finn’s guardian? I know you all recently lost your father and deepest condolences for that, but we’re having some issues with records and need to find the court documents. Naturally, of course, we want to get something in the books straight away.

“Oh yeah it’s totally Viktor, it makes sense. He’s the only one the little shit doesn’t hate!” Klaus said, grinning at their brother. Viktor glared briefly at Klaus, before flicking back to a polite smile and turning back to Michelle.

“Of course you can put me down. My sister in L.A. helped us sort the details, so she knows more about it than I do. I’ll make sure she’s here the next time you visit.”

With that, Michelle decided she’d had enough for the day. She was going to end up spending hours researching this particular family, she just knew it, and before that she would definitely need a nap.

A few handshakes later, and they were finally walking out of the imposing mansion. Michelle threw open the door to the car, dropping into the driver’s seat and resting her head against the steering wheel. Taking a deep breath, she leaned back in the chair, turning to look at Julia, who had an expression of deep thought across her face.

“What is it, Jules?” Michelle asked, running her hand across her face in exasperation.

“It’s—it’s nothing.” She replied.

“Jules?”

“It’s just, that kid. Don’t you think he looked an awful lot like Number Five? The one who went missing fifteen or so years ago, or something like that? I mean, it was uncanny!”

Michelle tipped forward, resting her head against the steering wheel once more. Tilting slightly, she looked at her partner.

“Please don’t go all ‘Mulder’ on me, Jules. The kid disappeared when he was thirteen. That child in there is no older than fourteen. You’re telling me, what, they’re the same person? Or that a thirteen year old crime-fighter had time to father a child before he disappeared?”

“I’m just saying there’s a lot of similarity! There were always rumors those kids were super-powered or something. I mean, Luther picked up a car and no-one batted an eye! Plus I saw Five in the street once, just before he stopped appearing publicly. I swear I was watching him run along, then he just disappeared in a flash of blue. That’s a little spooky, you’ve got to admit."

Michelle banged her head against the wheel again and again. This case was going to be the death of her.

Chapter Text

Michelle was sat on the floor of her and Julia’s office, documents spread out across the ground in every direction. Somewhere behind her she heard the door to the office open, and the sound of Julia swearing.

“Sorry, I should have warned you.” Michelle said, turning to look up at Julia. Julia just raised an eyebrow in response.

“Any reason we’ve got a new carpet?” she asked, picking her way carefully across the piles of documents and sitting down next to Michelle. She picked a random piece of paper from the floor.

“So, I was thinking about what you said the other day,” Michelle said, head buried in papers again.

“What did I say?” Julia replied, flipping over the paper in her hand. “Hey, these are about the Hargreeves family. This is from—this is from the nineties!”

“You said you were surprised that the Hargreeves family hadn’t been investigated before.” Michelle explained, plucking the paper from Julia’s hand and placing it back down on its original pile.

“Oh yeah. I mean, two kids gone before they all hit eighteen. It was a mess.” Julia replied, picking up another piece of paper. Michelle confiscated that piece too.

“Well, both deaths were heavily covered by the media. So I decided to go through all of our records, see if there was anything, and get this, there’s at least twelve open reports on this family, but they’ve just all been abandoned. It’s as if the investigators just forgot about them. I only found them by trawling through the miscellaneous part of the archives, and there’s nothing in the digital files at all.”

“Technically, Five only disappeared. No confirmation he’s dead.” Julia mused, before gesturing back to the piles of paper. “Is there anything interesting?”

“I don’t know yet, I only finished sorting them a few minutes ago. Haven’t read any of them yet.” 

Julia got up from her spot on the floor, turning on the spot and surveying the large piles of paper across their little office. With a sigh, she grabbed her purse, and stepped over the mess to the door.

“I’ll go get us some coffee.”

Twenty minutes later, and the two of them were combing through the files, jotting down notes and occasionally sharing excerpts from the reports with each other.

“Oh, Michelle, this one is from 1996, the kids would have only been seven at the time.” Jules said, thrusting a slightly yellowed report into Michelle’s hands. Michelle scanned through the document.

It was an investigation report following a statement from an owner of a local donut store. The investigation report itself was almost empty, simply stating that the CPS worker had visited on the 2^nd of November 1996, and that they’d spoken to the Father. There were no further details, and the report hadn’t been followed up at all, completely against CPS protocol. The lack of protocol was concerning, but other than that, it didn’t tell Michelle anything about the children, so she flipped to the next page, containing the original statement from an Agnes Rofa.

It was an interesting report. Michelle wondered if Agnes had been the owner of the ‘Griddy’s Donuts’ they’d passed on the way to Finn’s address a few days ago. It would have been close enough for the siblings to sneak out to. Still, even if it was close by, it was quite worrying that all the children had been able to leave the house for quite some time, and no one had noticed. It was no wonder CPS had decided to investigate.

She flicked through another report, the follow-up section completely blank this time. The report had been sent to a nearby police station, an older lady concerned about a group of young children out jogging in matching tracksuits, and calling each other only by numbers, instead of names. The woman had been worried the children were in a cult, but once the children had been identified as The Umbrella Academy, the concern had been dropped.

The report from the donut lady and the lady in the park were the oldest Michelle and Julia could find, dating back to when the Hargreeves would have been about seven. There were a few more documents from around that period of time, before the number of reports skyrocketed around 2001.

“That’s when they went public as The Umbrella Academy” Julia said, pointing to the large pile of concern records, “Do you remember? The bank job?”

Michelle couldn’t say she remembered it from the first time around, but she’d done quite a lot of internet research in recent weeks. She’d watched the footage from the bank heist several times. Grainy CCTV videos from inside the bank had been released a few weeks after the event, and it was clearly where the superpower speculation had begun. A little girl had whispered in the ear of a man, and he’d immediately shot his friend in the foot. Another had thrown knives that appeared to curve back on themselves. One boy, he genuinely seemed to disappear in one place and reappear in another. Michelle had watched that section several times, desperately trying to convince herself it was just a jump in the footage, the video was rather poor, after all.

There had been several more segments of footage over the years, but each one had been dodgier than the last, and it was a lot harder for the public to spot the “extraordinary abilities” the children apparently possessed. Michelle wondered if Reginald Hargreeves had been the cause of poor quality footage. He’d definitely had the money and power to do such a thing, it only took a bit of well-placed blackmail.

Unfortunately, the poor video quality couldn’t explain everything. It couldn’t explain how a teenage boy could throw a fully grown man through a window, it couldn’t explain how a boy had walked into a side room full of bank robbers, and came out uninjured. It was no wonder people had speculated their “extraordinary abilities” were superpowers. The comics had always used their little nicknames, and speculated powers from there, but everyone had assume that had just been marketing. Something to make The Umbrella Academy exciting for kids.

Most importantly, it couldn’t explain how the hell one of the skinny little boys looked quite so much like Finn. Were they the same person? Was that possible? Michelle hated herself for even considering such a crazy thought. So she filed it away in the recesses of her brain, looking back over to Julia, who had moved away from the floor, and was sat at her desk.

“What are you doing?” Michelle asked, groaning a little as she picked herself up off the ground.

“I was watching one of the interviews the Hargreeves kids did years ago. There’s not a lot of recorded interviews, and it’s weird, it’s like they were all recorded on older tech, none of it digital.” She paused, clicking a few buttons and pulling the video back to the start. “Still,” she said, “this one is pretty clear. Have a look at the kid on the right.”

Michelle’s ridiculous thoughts, that she’d just filed away, were pulled straight back to the forefront of her mind. The child on the right was sat comfortably in front of the camera, leaning back with a comfortable grin. A domino mask covered his eyes, but the rest of his face did seem strangely familiar. At one point in the interview, when the group were asked about birth parents, all the children’s faces dropped a little, and for that brief moment, Michelle could only see Finn. The same stony face, right down to the clenched jaw.

“The kid on the right is Number Five. The one who disappeared? I spotted him on the street once, about a week after this interview, then no-one ever heard from him again.” Julie said, pressing the pause button on the video.

“Julie,” Michelle interrupted, “we’ve been over this.”

“I know, I know. I just— the similarity. It’s disturbing.”

“A disturbing coincidence, but that’s all.” Michelle snapped, ignoring her own doubt. Julia nodded a little, but her disagreement was clear in her eyes.

A few days later, Michelle and Julia arrived at the house. Julia was practically bouncing, full of excitement to try and find some evidence for her theories on Five’s disappearance and the connection to Finn. She hadn’t stopped talking about it all since their little research session.

Michelle was just hoping to figure out the records for this family and quickly pass them on to another part of the system. She very rarely took against a family, most of them just needed a helping hand that CPS could provide for them. This family, however, were three times more complicated than any of the other open cases they had at the moment. The files made no sense, and the family were just strange.

Michelle didn’t get the impression that this child was unsafe. There was something else there, sure, but the kid was apparently adopted by the ‘eccentric billionaire’ Reginald Hargreeves, long after he’d formed The Umbrella Academy. That man didn’t seem like a cuddly parental figure. Then again, what did she know about raising children with superpowers?

Michelle got the feeling Finn was loved by his siblings, even if their situation was strange. So, she just wanted to get the paperwork sorted out and get them off her list. She really didn’t need an existential crisis every time she remembered that the tall one with the eyeliner was rumored to be capable of talking to the dead! 

Reaching forward, Michelle knocked on the door. A kind looking woman with curly hair answered the door.

Allison. She knew this particular Hargreeves by face now. It turned out she was the most famous of them all, an up-and-coming Hollywood star, with all the drama to go with it. The tabloids knew more about the woman’s divorce than her own daughter probably did. It sounded messy.

“Can I help you?” She asked, smiling pleasantly.

“Good morning,” Michelle replied, “We’re here to check in on Finn?”

“Oh of course. Although, I heard a rumor…”

A few weeks later

“Jules?” Michelle shouted through to the kitchenette by their office.

“Yeah?” she replied, walking through with a coffee in one hand and a croissant in the other.

“I’ve got in the calendar that we were supposed to visit Finn a couple weeks back. But… we didn’t, right?”

Michelle looked back down to her diary, maybe she’d misread it? No, there it was. Friday morning a few weeks before, ‘visit to Finn Hargreeves’. Why hadn’t they visited? It wasn’t like them to leave a child for several weeks without a visit, certainly not when they were still lacking in answers, but they hadn’t gone.

Or, had they? She had this strange feeling, this odd déjà vu. Hadn’t they been to visit? The door had been answered by someone, she was sure of it.

A pretty woman, with curly hair. She was absolutely certain.

Allison.

“Hey Jules?”

“Mmph? Wha ib it? Jules replied, mouth stuffed full of pastry. She chewed, swallowed and tried again.

“What’s up?”

“What was the nickname for Allison? Number Three?” Michelle asked, peering through the files on her desk, looking through her diary for any other forgotten appointments. She’d already found two.

“The Rumor. I think she’s meant to be super persuasive. Not sure how it’s supposed to work.”

Hmm. Rumors. That rang a bell as well.

“Right, come on, we’re getting in the car.” Michelle said, grabbing her bag and her coat, “I think it’s time we had an honest conversation with the Hargreeves, don’t you?”

Chapter Text

The two of them drove to the The Umbrella Academy building, once again finding themselves in front of their door, ringing the bell. Michelle stepped in front of her colleague this time, no desire to let their conversation get derailed before they got some real answers.

As expected, it was Allison who answered the door. Michelle wondered idly what commitments she was missing in L.A. just to hang around and persuade CPS to disappear.

“I heard—”

“Please don’t hear any rumors, Miss Hargreeves.” Michelle interrupted, really hoping that her assertiveness would not backfire. “I’ve already left myself several notes in different places to ensure we don’t forget to return. It would be quicker just to get this over and done with, don’t you think?”

Allison’s eyebrow’s jumped up a little, the woman clearly unused to anyone challenging her and her… powers? God, superpowers. How did she end up dealing with superpowers? Luckily for Michelle, Allison soon shrugged, holding off on the rest of her rumor and opening the door a little wider, gesturing for them to come in.

“Is there anything in particular you’d like to talk about?” Allison asked, her demeanor calm, collected and approachable. It was clearly a persona she had perfected for Hollywood, but it wasn’t going to work on Michelle. She was so done with this bullshit.

“Yes, you can gather whatever adults are in this house, and we can sit down and talk about Finn. Honestly.”

Allison nodded once, showing Michelle and Julia to an ornate living room, decked out with fancy furniture. Turning to one end, Michelle spotted a bar. She walked a little closer, expecting to spy high-brand liquors and expensive bottles of champagne, she was slightly surprised to find most shelves empty, or filled with empty decanters. The shelves on the bottom seemed to hold various flavour juice boxes, and some bottles of Gatorade. It wasn’t what Michelle was expecting.

“I’d offer you a drink, but tragically we’ve got rid of most of the booze,” came a voice from behind her, the accent English. “Oh, and I have no idea who the hell you are.”

Michelle turned again, spotting the source of the sound down the far end of the living room. At the opposite end of the room, perched on a maroon armchair, was a small woman with dark brown skin. Her hair was cut into a messy bob, and she was grinning at Michelle and Jules.

It was not a nice grin. In fact, it reminded her of the terrifying expressions she’d seen from Finn. She’d have said they’d clearly been taught by the same person, except Michelle knew the names of every single Hargreeves sibling, and this wasn’t one of them.

Unless there were more unexpected children. Michelle really hoped not. At least this one was clearly an adult, so there wouldn’t be any more paperwork for her. Putting on a smile, she walked over to the woman and stuck out her hand.

“Michelle Scanlan, Child Protective Services.”

The woman shook her hand, “Lila. Not a child.”

Julia laughed at that, ignoring the quick glare of disapproval that Michelle sent her way.

Fortunately, they were saved from the rest of the awkward interaction by the reappearance of Allison, and several of the Hargreeves siblings behind her. Viktor first, followed by Klaus, who gave them a little wave with his “Hello” hand.

Then came an incredibly large man, towering over everyone in the room. His broad body was stuffed into a turtleneck and a sweater, and he was wearing fingerless gloves. He gave Michelle a polite smile, looking a little unsure of himself, before wandering over to the far end of the room and sitting down on a couches near Lila. The couch groaned a little, but didn’t break. Michelle watched as the rest of the siblings followed suit, heading to the jumble of furniture all centred around a large flat-screened television.

The couches and chairs did not match the rest of the aesthetic of the room, and were somewhat clumsily arranged around the TV. Each of the siblings found a seat, moving to the various chairs and couches with an air of familiarity. If she had to guess, Michelle would have said they all their own spots, and they didn’t stray from them. Noticeably, no one sat in the large green armchair nestled in the corner of the room, despite it looking to easily be the comfiest seat in the room. Michelle perched on the edge of one of the couches, next to the large man. He didn’t feel particularly hostile, however huge he was.

“So,” Allison started, “What was it you wanted to talk about?”

Michelle got back up from her position, beginning to pace back and forth. Julia filled the space, perching on the couch, and watching her colleague with both confusion and a little bit of concern. It was fair enough, Michelle couldn’t remember the last time she’d been so worked up with one of her cases. This wasn’t even a bad one! There were unanswered questions, but her gut was telling me this was a caring family.

They were just so fucking weird.

“I’d like you all to be straight with me. I have been investigating this child for over a month now. I have spent more time than I’d like trying to figure out this strange family, trying to figure out where on earth Finn has come from.”

Michelle paused, pinching the bridge of her nose.

“So, please, tell me, where did Finn come from? Whose child is he? Did Reginald Hargreeves adopt them, or is he one of yours?”

With that, Michelle couldn’t help but glance at Klaus, thinking back to what Julia had said before. Klaus just laughed, putting his hands up in mock surrender.

“Oh I did a lot of shit at sixteen, mostly cocaine, but I didn’t father a child last I checked. The gremlin’s not mine.”

Michelle looked around the rest of the faces in the room, who were looking at her, either with a level of amusement or horror at the concept of Finn being their child. Michelle sighed, she felt no closer to finding the truth.

“He’s not ‘any of ours’.” Viktor said. “He’s our brother.”

Michelle wanted to scream.

“So, you’re telling me that Reginald Hargreeves adopted seven children out of the blue, raised you all to fight crime and thrust you all into the spotlight for your entire childhood. Then fifteen years later went and adopted another child, and this time decided not to tell a living soul about it.” She said, throwing her hands up in despair.

“Well, he actually only raised six of us to fight crime.” Viktor commented, “I joined an orchestra.”

Klaus laughed again, this time joined by Viktor. Klaus waved his ‘Hello’ hand again towards the doorway, and Michelle turned to watch another man walk through the door, wavy hair down to just below his chin, and a knife in his hand. Michelle was pretty sure the knife he was flipping was technically illegal. She was certain the additional eight strapped to his chest were.

“Do you really think that’s appropriate in a house with children?” she blurted out, overwhelmed with frustration, and slightly horrified by the actions of the man in front of her.

When every single person behind her laughed, Michelle turned, spying a traitor in her midst. Julia was also laughing.

Michelle didn’t get the chance to admonish her colleague, because she was again interrupted by the sound of someone else entering the room, a cane tapping against the hardwood floor. She turned once again, slightly motion sick from the amount of whipping back and forth she’d done in the past two minutes.

Slowly, Finn Hargreeves moved closer to the group, walking straight past Michelle and Julia, and lowering himself into the unoccupied green armchair. He crossed his legs, the movement seeming a little easier than before. Michelle was glad to see he was improving.

He didn’t say anything initially, looking Michelle and Julia up and down. After a moment, he sighed.

“I’m not a child.” He said, his voice weary and tired.

“I understand that you may feel that way, Finn, but—”

“No. I’m not a fucking child.” He interrupted. Allison tried to catch his eye, raising an eyebrow, but Finn waved her down, continuing to speak. “No, Allison. I’m not dealing with this crap anymore. I’m not a teenager, and I’m not Finn either.”

Michelle did not like where this was going. She tried to collect her thoughts, figure out the best response. It was almost easier when the boy was just staring at her. Now she felt like she was poking around in a can of worms she was going to regret ever opening.

“Okay.” She started, “so who are you?”

Julia laughed again, really laughing this time, her hand on her belly and her head thrown back.

“I told you, Michelle. I fucking told you!” she said, still laughing a little. She turned to the teenager, sobering up. “You’re Number Five, aren’t you? The one who disappeared?”

The teenager said nothing, but he did look slightly impressed.

“That’s ridiculous.” Michelle replied to Julia, ignoring everyone else in the room. “He disappeared seventeen years ago. He would be thirty by now.”

“Michelle!” Julia shouted, raising her hands in despair. “Look at him! He’s the spit of the kid who vanished off the face of the earth almost two decades ago. The damn rumors were true, they clearly all have fucking superpowers, I mean one of them keeps magically making us forget we’ve even been here.”

“Which, by the way—" Julia turned to Allison, “was a little rude. Please stop doing that.”

Allison just shrugged in response, no sign of contrition.

“You know we don’t swear in front of the children.” Michelle said softly, almost by reflex.

Julia stood from her spot on the couch.

“He’s not a child! I don’t know how to explain it, but I can just tell. You know me! I’m terrible at dealing with kids, and I’m terrible at dealing with him.”

She turned back to Finn, gesturing to him.

“You’re the little jumpy guy right? Disappears and reappears? What did you do? Get a jump wrong and live on the moon for years?”

Julia looked almost hysterical at this point. Meanwhile, the one with the knives, Diego if Michelle remembered correctly, was wiggling his eyebrows at the large man in the turtleneck, who was going a rather bright red. Julia didn’t notice any of this, jumping right back in with her theorizing.

“Oh no. Wait! I’ve got it, you can jump through space, right? That means you can probably jump through time. I’ve seen enough sci-fi to know they go hand-in-hand. What did you do, jump back in time and get stuck with the dinosaurs for a century. Did you de-age yourself by accident or something?”

Silence enveloped the room, Lila and the siblings turning to Finn (or Five), their expressions dour. Julia paused, realizing that her frantic ranting had struck a chord.

Michelle contemplated stepping in, apologizing for her colleague and trying to get the situation back on track, but she had no idea where to begin. Julia had just suggested time travel for God’s sake. It was a crazy possibility, but the reaction she’d had suggested the theory had hit a little too close to home. Michelle hadn’t got a clue what to do with that information.

So she waited, and so did everyone else.

After another moment, Finn/Five’s mouth twisted into a wry smile. The same tired look Michelle had seen before appeared in his eyes; the one that made him look so very old, but there was a softness to it that she hadn’t seen before.

“Apocalyptic future, actually.” He replied, words a little stilted, but aiming for casual, “came back to stop it, failed. Went back to the sixties and tried again. We’re okay now.”

“Well that’s horrifying.” Julia replied, dropping back into her seat on the couch. “So, how old are you?”

“Fifty-eight, give or take.”

“And you are Number Five?” Michelle questioned.

“Oh yeah, the little bastard is Five, alright.” Lila replied. Five just offered her a slightly clumsy salute.

Michelle stood, staring at the crowd in front of her. A group of extraordinary, terrifying people.

She hated them all. So much.

“Okay. To get this straight, because I’m the one who has to write a report after this.” Michelle said, sighing. “Finn is actually Number Five. You, Number Five, disappeared in 2002 because you jumped forwards in time to a post-apocalyptic future. You spent forty-five years, give or take, in the future, before jumping back to the present. Then you all disappeared to sixties, in order to prevent the apocalypse from ever happening. Oh, and you look the same as the day you disappeared. Have I missed anything?”

“Oh, you forgot the time assassins!” Klaus said, waving his hands enthusiastically. Michelle just shook her head. Either there was a group delusion at play, or there were secrets of the universe here that she didn’t ever want to know.

“I think we’re best to keep it simple, don’t you agree?” she said with a small sigh, “or as simple as this clusterfuck can be.”

“Wait!” Julia interrupted, “Why do you look thirteen?

“Oh, you already figured that one out!” Lila replied, leaning forward to ruffle Five’s hair. Five grimaced a little at the contact, but didn’t pull away.

“I miscalculated.” He said, grimace remaining on his face.

“Ouch” Julia replied. Five tipped his head slightly in acknowledgement, raising an eyebrow.

Michelle ran her hands through her hair, and took a deep breath, throwing her head back in frustration.

“Well, I don’t know how the hell this is going to play out in court, but I for one am greatly looking forward to passing on this case to another worker. It was an ‘experience’ to meet you, Number Five.” She said, reaching forward to offer Five her hand. Five did not take it.

“Wait, court?” Klaus interrupted, “Why court? Just write in your little report that Fivey here is an adult, and we’re all sorted, right?”

Michelle raised both her eyebrows at Klaus. God, these people had clearly never dealt with the real world.

“No, Mr Hargreeves. Even if my boss accepts my report that Five here is actually a time traveller and is nearly sixty years old, legally he’s an unregistered child, and the courts will have to be involved. It’s going to be a crazy case. I suggest you find yourselves a good Lawyer.”

“And maybe a deal with Netflix.” Julia added under her breath.

“So after all of this, we’re still going to have to go to court?” Allison asked.

“Looks like it.” Michelle replied, picking up her bag. “Try not to hear too many rumors in front of the Judge, it could end up being awfully suspicious.”

With that, she started to walk to the door, turning back to check Julia was following her. Instead, Julia was walking over to Five, her hand outstretched. Surprisingly, Five shook it.

“Welcome back, Number Five.” She said softly. Five said nothing in return. As the two women walked to the door, Julia twisted back at the last moment.

“Oh, and good luck convincing the court about the whole time-travel thing!” she said enthusiastically.

As the two of them walked out into the hallway, Michelle overheard Five’s one word response.

“Shit.”

Michelle just smiled, smiling as they walked out of the door, and smiling all the way to the car. Their report was going to be truly ridiculous, the explanation of Finn’s sudden appearance made no sense whatsoever, but their CPS investigation was now complete.

The Hargreeves would be someone else’s problem now.

Thank God.

Chapter Text

Michelle settled into her office chair, and opened up her emails.

The last week or so had been spent dealing with quite a complicated family situation. A teen pregnancy, a failed adoption placement. It had been quite a difficult scenario, but Michelle was pretty happy with the outcome. Everyone had a safe and happy home at the end of it, and she was happy that the other workers in her team would provide the support they needed.

It was cases like that one that made her feel good about her job. Cases where the right bit of investigation, the correct calming tones and understanding words could help find the root of the problem. Some cases were tougher than others, but Michelle loved to help. It was satisfying.

Most of the time. Sometimes the outcome was simply infuriating. Michelle shuddered a little at the recollection of the Hargreeves family case. It wasn’t that she was concerned for anyone. Hell, apparently there were no children in that case at all. Instead, there was a fifty-something-year-old manchild, who had apparently travelled through time. Oh, and had stopped the apocalypse, allegedly.

Michelle had spent hours mulling over which family court specialist she wanted to hand the case over to. First she’d thought it would need someone experienced. Then she thought that it would need to be someone rather open-minded. Eventually, she’d given it to Brenda.

Michelle didn’t like Brenda.

So as Michelle was checking her emails, she was happy to say the Hargreeves brood were happily sat on Brenda’s desk, and she’d never have to deal with that clusterfuck of a family again.

There was an email.

From Brenda.

Michelle sighed, pulled open her drawer and withdrew a can of energy drink. Then, in one swift motion, she cracked it open and downed the whole thing, dropping the crushed tin into the trashcan beside her feet. She just knew she was going to need the caffeine.

At that point, Julia walked through the office door, two coffee cups in her hands. She placed one on the edge of Michelle’s desk, Michelle immediately pulling off the lid and downing that as well. When that was finished, Michelle turned to Julia, who was looking at her with a mildly horrified expression.

“Did you talk to Brenda on Friday?” Michelle asked. Julia stared at her colleague for a moment more, before shaking herself out of her reverie.

“Yeah, she asked us to cover her court dates this week, one of her kids has an operation or something.” Julia replied.

“Kid?” Michelle said, before scoffing. “Did she say kid, or did she say ‘baby’?”

“Err, 'Baby', I assumed it was a pet name.”

Michelle shook her head slightly. God, she hated Brenda so much.

“It's a pet name, for a literal pet. She’s taking a week off to comfort her fucking dog!”

“Oh.” Julia replied, taking a small sip of coffee. “Oops? Well, it’s only the one case, it’ll probably be done by Tuesday afternoon and we’ll have a quiet week.”

Michelle shook her head again, before throwing it back with a groan.

“Yeah, except something tells me it’s not going to be a simple case. Have you seen which family it is?”

“Oh.” Julia repeated. “Oh no.”

“Yep.”

“Shit.”

Later That Day

Michelle folded up her jacket, placing it on the bench before she sat down. Experience had taught her that some cushioning was never remiss on a courtroom bench. They weren’t designed for comfort. After a few hours they caused complete numbness of the bottom half and, Oh Lord, did Michelle know they were going to be there a while. After all, she couldn’t remember any other registration case where the defense was ‘I’m actually a time travelling middle-aged man”.

So, she had made sure to bring her thickest coat, and an extremely large travel mug of coffee, to add to the Energy Drink she’d downed earlier and the two cups of coffee she’d had that morning. Maybe, Michelle reasoned, if her body was completely full of caffeine, there would be no space for the overwhelming existential dread she experienced every time she was in the vicinity of the Hargreeves family.

As Julia sat down next to her, Michelle pulled out the files Brenda had left on her desk. She flicked through the Hargreeves case file, skipping past her own report, and skimming through the notes from the previous court dates.

It looked like the family originally been invited to a judge, rather than a full court. That was pretty normal, no-one wanted to force everyone in front of a court when it was possible to solve the problem in a quieter manner. Unfortunately for everyone involved, the notes in Michelle’s hands suggested the meeting with the judge hadn’t gone too well.

“The Hargreeves family insist that the child presented is Number Five Hargreeves, who was born in 1989. When asked whether the child had any condition to stunt growth, one family member stated post-apocalyptic starvation.

I’m not sure if I should label all of the adults entirely incapable of raising a child, or if the insanity is simply a poor attempt at fraud.”

The judge had concluded that they were unable to reach a ruling, and the issue would need to be settled in court. Then, there had been several attempted court dates. Each one cancelled at the last minute. Michelle pulled out her phone for a moment, consulting a celebrity spotting site. Allison Hargreeves had been spotted in the city a lot over the last few months. In fact, there had been a sighting almost every time the court date had cancelled. Michelle wondered quite how many ‘rumors’ had been heard lately.

Unfortunately for Five, Allison’s latest sighting had been in L.A., on-set for some spy thriller film. Clearly rumors didn’t work over the phone.

Putting her phone away, Michelle watched as a selection of the Hargreeves family filed into the court, sitting on the front bench, a row ahead of herself and Julia. At the back of the pack, Five walked in, still using his cane, but faster than before. He looked pissed off, lowering himself down onto the bench next to Viktor. Klaus was sat next to them, and immediately twisted round in his seat, locking eyes with Julia and waving enthusiastically, his hand practically in Julia’s face. Diego smacked Klaus’s hand down, before nodding to both Julia and Michelle.

Five did not turn. He sat facing forward, one leg crossed over the other and left hand resting on the top of his cane. It was a new one, this one had a metallic bird’s head on the top. It looked rather expensive. Michelle wondered if he’d liberated it from his late Father’s collection.

Klaus was now whispering excitedly to Julia about something, who looked a little baffled that she’d apparently made a friend. They continued to chat for a few moments, before the door opened, and the Judge walked in. Everyone stood, except Five, who stayed seated, despite Viktor tapping him on the shoulder repeatedly.

The judge stood, surveying the room, and pausing on Number Five.

“I believe you were informed that the child should not be present at this hearing, were you not?” he said, raising an eyebrow at Five. Michelle could only see part of Five’s face, but she was pretty sure he’d simply raised an eyebrow in return.

At that point, Michelle spotted that the Hargreeves had at least had the sense to get a lawyer. He was a slightly balding, skinny man with glasses. He looked like he was about to have a nervous breakdown, but he was about to present time travel as a defense in a court of law, Michelle would have been nervous too.

The man got up, adjusting his glasses and stepping forward.

“I recognize that we’re possibly bending the rules a little here, Your Honor, but I’m sure you’ll agree once we present our case, that his presence here is pertinent.”

“Ah, yes.” the judge replied, “I read your submission, I had simply hoped it was a belated April fool’s day prank.”

Michelle frowned, it was November.

“Alas, it looks like you really will be presenting this case, yes?”

The lawyer pulled out a handkerchief, patting at his slightly sweaty brow.

“Yes, Your Honor.” he said, although he sounded rather reticent, looking over to the Hargreeves family sat on the bench beside him. Five was watching the judge with the same stony expression he’d given Michelle and Julia the first time she’d met him. The others (Viktor, Diego and Klaus) were all giving the lawyer reassuring smiles and nods. The lawyer did not look reassured in the slightest.

“Well then, please present your case.” The judge said, leaning back in his chair.

With that, the lawyer launched into a lengthy explanation of various concepts in physics, citing research by plenty of scientists. Some references were more well-known, (“and as stated by Albert Einstein...”), and others were less familiar (“Demonstrated by the Ives–Stilwell experiments”). The lawyer seemed familiar with the words, but they were all stated in a uniform tone. He’d clearly practiced the statement, but he likely didn't understand it. Looking to the side, Michelle spotted Five nodding along slightly, so he’d probably provided the information. Michelle had no idea if any of it made sense, but if it did, the boy was almost certainly a genius.

Only he wasn’t a boy. He was fifty-nine years old, apparently. Michelle shook her head a little. It didn’t matter what defense Five provided, no-one in their right mind would look at him and believe that he was older than half the people in the room. It didn’t matter what formulas he presented, he was going to lose his case. If he was the genius he appeared to be, he probably knew that too. Although according to his own words, he’d spent most of his life alone in a post-apocalyptic future, so maybe he had no idea how the real world worked.

Michelle took a large sip from her travel cup. More caffeine, less dread, that was the way forward.

The lawyer finally concluded his statement, nodding once to the judge and sitting back down. The judge sat in silence for several moments, contemplating what had been said. After a minute or so, he spoke.

“Seeing as you are intent on proving to me you are an adult, I will speak to you frankly, Mr Hargreeves. I am not a physicist. I am however, a sensible enough man to understand my own limitations, so the opinions of several prominent theoretical physicists have been procured. I believe your lawyer will have discussed this with you?"

Five’s scowl deepened.

“Yes.” He replied curtly. Viktor elbowed him lightly in the ribs, “Your Honor.”

“Good—” the Judge replied, before he was cut off by Five.

“But it's all bullshit. They're morons. They haven’t got a brain cell between them.”

Michelle sighed, praying to some god, somewhere, that Five would know what was best for him and would shut up right now.

“Mr Hargreeves, I’d ask that you don’t use that language in my courtroom, that’s your first warning. The amicus brief was provided by some of the best universities in the country.”

“One of those 'esteemed scientists' is arguing we bring back the fucking cosmological constant!” Five shouted, standing up from the bench and gesticulating wildly.

“Mr Hargreeves, if you don’t stop talking now, I will have to find you in contempt of court." the judge warned.

“They’re all idiots, every single one of them! Except maybe the team at MIT. They’re doing something weird with Navier-Stokes, but they honestly might solve a millennium problem at this rate. The rest of them though, they’re completely fucking stupid. Not a single ounce of sense to share.”

“Mr Hargreeves!”

The Next Day

When the court reconvened the next morning, Five looked a little worse for wear. It was rare for a minor to be given a night in the cells, but the judge had said it was only fair for someone who was so desperate to be seen as an adult. Judge Mendoza had clearly not taken to the Hargreeves family.

The judge arrived, and everyone stood, except Five. The judge waited, staring him down. Five stared back, and everyone waited. Viktor was now poking Five in the shoulder, and Klaus was rocking back and forth on his toes nervously, but Five still did not stand.

“Mr Hargreeves, I’d prefer not to delay this any further, wouldn’t you? If I have to deal with ‘Time Travel’ as a legal argument, you have to stand for the judge. It’s a fair compromise, no?”

Five stood, slowly, leaning on his cane. Michelle wasn’t sure how much of it was for effect, and how much was stiffness in his joints, she’d seen the cells enough times in her career and they were not comfortable.

“Now then, let’s get this finished.”

Court proceedings began again, Five’s lawyer looking even more unsure of himself today. Five wisely kept his mouth shut through most of it, only speaking to confirm answers, or to correct the lawyer on the physics.

Evidence was presented by the Hargreeves, and evidence was presented by the state. At one point, Michelle’s initial report from months ago was discussed.

Having her name attached to this case didn’t particularly please Michelle, she wasn't sure it would do wonders for her career. Although it would give her fifteen seconds of fame, it seemed. Cases involving minors were usually kept quiet and had little media involvement, but someone had clearly talked to the press overnight. There were now a collection of journalists outside, camped out in the hope to speak to someone involved in the “Case for Time Travel”.

Michelle had come into court that morning with her sunglasses on, despite the dreary weather, in a vain hope to keep herself free from the vultures. It hadn’t worked, and she’d had her first experience of dodging paparazzi and saying “no comment” over and over. Was this what Allison’s life was like all the time?

Eventually, after hours of presenting evidence and a full can of Monster poured into half a cup of coffee, Michelle sighed a breath of relief when the judge called to end the final recess of the day, ready to present a verdict.

Judge Mendoza looked really rather unhappy, and just a little disconcerted. Michelle knew the feeling well, she was painfully familiar with the "Hargreeves Effect". This time, when the judge appeared, Five stood, he’d clearly had enough with the case as well.

The judge sat, and so did everyone else. There was silence for a moment, before the judge heaved a great sigh.

“I want to first state, that this is not a court case to determine the existence of time-travel, no matter what the media are saying. As a judge, I have been asked to determine whether the person in question is Number Five Hargreeves, and whether that person is a child.”

“The plaintiffs have provided dental records, facial analysis, and some… interesting eyewitness testimony—”

Michelle shuddered at the memory of Klaus in the stands.

“—The evidence in front of me suggests that the person in question is, in fact, Number Five Hargreeves.”

Five relaxed a little, it was almost imperceptible, but it was there. The others showed much more obvious signs of relief, Klaus even going so far as throwing his hands in the air and whooping. His arms were smacked down by Diego once again, who looked like he wanted to be anywhere but there.

“However,” the judge began again, and everyone in the room tensed. This was the moment they’d been waiting for over the entire case. Whether a Judge was really going to accept ‘Time Travel and Age Regression’ as anything other than science fiction.

“Genetic analysis puts Mr Hargreeves’ physical age around fifteen, and I have to comment on the evidence in front of my eyes. You are a child, Mr Hargreeves. I will not comment on the feasibility of this, I will not comment on the possibilities of time travel, that is for scientists to determine, not me.”

The judge paused, removing his glasses and pinching his brow.

“Even if I must accept the possibility of time travel, even if I cannot explain your existence any other way. You have failed to present any viable way for this time travel to have occurred. How, exactly, did you ‘jump through time?’”

Ah, yes. That particular hiccup. Five had point-blank refused to demonstrate his powers. Each statement by Five had relied on his apparent ability to jump through space and time, but had simply avoided any requests for him to show them.

“I’ve already told you,” Five interrupted, “I can’t. It would—” he paused, trying again, “it would, oh goddamnit.” He slammed his cane down in frustration as he struggled to finish his sentence.

Five had got through most of the case without any issues with his speech, but his tiredness was likely catching up with him, it had been a very long day.

“It would smush his brains even further, your honor” Klaus interrupted.

“Smush?” Viktor whispered to Diego, Diego just shrugged.

“Ah Yes, the injury that started it all," the judge mused, and the ‘accidental’ registering of Number Five under an incorrect name, this has all been… quite the case.”

The judge sighed once more. Michelle wished she could offer the man a coffee. Caffeine fueled denial was the only way to survive the Hargreeves. She took a large gulp from her travel cup.

“Well, regardless. I have plenty of evidence that you are Number Five Hargreeves, but I have no evidence that you are actually fifty-nine years old. I cannot declare a child to be an adult based on a pile of theoretical physics that world-renowned researchers have never seen before in their lives.”

Five went to interrupt, but Viktor firmly pushed him back down into his seat. The judge glared at Five, before straightening his back slightly and continuing.

“You, Mr Hargreeves, are a child. In that line, you’ll need a new legal guardian. Which of your… wonderful siblings is volunteering for the pleasure?” he asked, looking down at his notes. “I believe your lawyer has organized for this to be one ‘Viktor Hargreeves’, formerly known as Number Seven Hargreeves, yes?.”

Viktor stood, nodding at the judge.

“Do you understand the responsibility you will have for your brother, Mr Hargreeves?”

“Yes, your Honor.” He replied. The judge scoffed at this, breaking his professional demeanor for a moment.

“And you’re really happy to take him on?” he asked.

Viktor scowled in response. “Absolutely, your Honor.”

“Well then,” the judge began, “The state will issue Number Five Hargreeves with new documentation to reflect the decision of this case. Viktor Hargreeves, Number Five is now your responsibility. As part of this, the city’s board of education will be in touch about appropriate schools.”

Five’s face dropped at that, morphing from horror, to anger, and then back to cold defiance. The judge turned back to face him, leaning over from his bench and staring Five down.

“Now, young man. I want no more reports of underage drinking. No more reports of underage driving. Stay in school, stay out of trouble, and, dear God, stay out of my sight.”

The judge banged his gavel, dismissing the case. Five locked eyes with the man, stood, and flipped him the bird. Then, before anyone could respond, he turned away and walked out of the court as fast as his legs would carry him. Klaus disappeared after him, flapping his arms as he went.

Michelle watched as each of the Hargreeves family filed out of the room. Slowly, she stood, cracking her back and her neck, before turning to Julia. Julia was grinning.

“I told you it was Number Five.”

Michelle didn’t reply, she didn’t even know what to say. Had she just watched a court acknowledge the possibility of time travel? Or had she just watched a judge neatly avoid ruling on the worrisome questions, the questions that had been haunting her for months.

She really had no idea. Her entire body was vibrating from the caffeine, but all Michelle wanted was more coffee. Instead she braced herself, stepping out of the court and into an antechamber, where she once again came face to face with the craziest family in the USA.

“Well, welcome back to the land of the living, Number Five.” She said, settling in one of the chairs in the room.

“Thanks” he muttered in reply, leaning against a wall and twisting his cane in his hands.

“So what’s next?” Viktor asked, pointedly ignoring the rest of his brothers, one of whom was fiddling with a pile of books in one corner, another of whom was pulling faces at Five, presumably in an attempt to cheer him up. It wasn’t working.

Michelle turned to Viktor, forcing herself to turn on a professional tone, rather than one of complete despair at the antics in front of her.

“CPS will stay involved for the next ninety days at minimum, we’ll help you get settled into your role as a guardian, and Five will have a case worker who checks in every now and again.”

“Oh, and you’ll need to find a school for Five, we can help you with that.” Julia added, giving Five a small smile. Five did not smile back. In fact, he slammed his cane on the ground.

“I am not going to any damn school! I am older than all of you and I’m not spending any time in a shithole full of pre-pubescent dickheads.”

“Then you’ll have someone like me investigating you all over again, another court case, and you’ll probably be removed from Viktor’s care.” Michelle replied, shrugging, “It’s up to you, really.”

“You never know, Five. You might learn something!” Klaus interjected. Five hit Klaus in the stomach with his cane, causing Klaus to bend over double, wheezing heavily.

“Or not.” He whispered.

Five smirked. Trying to keep things on track, Viktor turned to Klaus and Five, raising an eyebrow at the two of them. Five slowly lifted his cane, clearly intent on hitting Klaus again. Viktor clenched his fists in response, and suddenly there was a blue light coming from his chest.

“Woah.” Julia muttered.

Michelle just stared. Huh, guess they did have powers. She took a sip of her cold coffee, eyes fixed firmly on the interaction between Viktor and his brothers. Five slowly lowered the cane, and the blue light went out.

At that point, Michelle decided it was time for a tactical retreat. Stepping away from the Hargreeves and towards the door, she lightly grabbed Julia by the arm, steering her away from Viktor and the others.

“Hmm. Wonderful, good luck to you all. CPS will be in touch.”

With that, Michelle and Julia of them stepped out of the antechamber and into the foyer. Michelle went to take another sip from her travel mug, sad to find it was now empty. Shoving it into her bag, she looked over to Julia. Julia frowned.

“Do you think any of them are capable of looking after a child? Of caring for a teenager?”

Michelle threw her head back in laughter. “Oh God no, but I also don’t think he’s a teenager. They’ll be fine.” She replied.

Julia’s frown deepened.

“Wait, you believe he really did time travel, you believe he de-aged himself?!” Julia asked, her voice getting louder in excitement.

Michelle shushed her, smiling at her partner.

“I believe there are new cases sat on our desks. Ones that don’t involve time travel. Come on, I’ll buy you a coffee.”

The two of them walked away from the court building, neatly avoiding the press clamoring for a sighting of the famous Hargreeves siblings. Julia paused for a moment, looking back at the crowd around the building, before turning back and catching up with Michelle.

“Are you sure you should have any more caffeine?” she asked.

Michelle looked down at her hand, watching it shake slightly. Then she thought back to the unnatural blue light that Viktor had produced.

One more cup of coffee couldn’t hurt.