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As the thoughts coursed through his head he looked back onto the train ride, after the train door closes he walks to his area and changed from the clothes his parents had given him, into the outfit he felt the most comfortable. He had never really been comfortable in his parent's house and the hours spent riding to a place he hoped would be able to call his new home, praying he would not have to worry that someone would recognize who he once was. Growing up in the south forced him into a role he knew would never truly fit him. As he stares out the window the train comes to a stop, gathering his things as he walks off for the first time truly feeling himself. No one here knew of who he was when he was younger, they just saw him as he was now.
The trip to his apartment was short but nerve-racking the feeling of someone watching him never quite going away. He knew that it wasn’t real but the years of torment as a child made him feel that he wasn’t really safe. His back turned towards the street he walked up the steps holding his breath, turning the knob he steps in. He was finally in a place where he could be himself. He starts to unpack the few clothes he was able to bring with him they were stale from being kept at the bottom of his closet and under his bed. The other clothes that his parents had helped him pack set in the bags he wish he could have left behind, maybe he could drop them off at the thrift store, he could always tell them it was from an ex-girlfriend who had just left the dresses and jewels when she left him. After all who would believe that he once was the one who wore them? He decides to go ahead and head down towards the shops carrying the bag of clothes he would soon never see again the bubbling in his chest made him want to explode. He noticed the sign ‘Mary Janes Thrifts’ listening to the bell jingle he walks through the door the girl at the front maybe a year or two older turns her head her short brunette curls bouncing as she turns her name tag reads ‘Mary Jane’, she must be the owner. He stands where he had just walked in from looking more lost than a kid at Oktoberfest.
Gulping in a breath He talks as sternly as possible, “Ma’am I’d like to trade in these clothes.” hoping he came across as more than just a kid attempting to sound like a grown-up.
She responds in a kind voice “Right over here sir, we have trade-in for store credit or cash, which would you like to do?
“Um, uh- cash” He quickly stumbles out trying to hide his blush, she really was one of the prettiest ladies he had ever seen, she had to be almost a foot taller than him which wasn’t surprising but he wished he could have been taller just so he could look her in the eyes. He snaps back to the sound of her voice, she truly sounded like an angel.
“No problem hun, anything else I can do for you today? If not I’d love to see you around more, perhaps for a coffee?” She flirts with him.
He looks up like a deer caught in headlights “Yes! I mean no, I don’t have anything else, and yes I’d love to get a coffee!” He scrambles enthusiastically.
“There’s a nice place right down the street called ‘Moody Brews’ I get off in about ½ an hour so I’ll see you there.”She winks at him. He feels faint and starts to head to the door barely registering he hadn’t yet answered
“½ an hour got it, I’ll see you there.” He hastily walks out of the shop rounding the corner to his house in hopes of getting himself a little bit ready in the time it takes her to finish work. Bursting through his door and slamming it shut he hopes this isn’t just a joke the world is playing on him. After getting ready he walks back around the corner past Mary Jane’s continuing until the large sign reading Moody Brews comes into view. He walks in looking around for Mary Jane. Spotting her he walks over the realization he has yet to introduce himself to her dawns on him, he hasn’t done this before and a small pit starts to grow in his stomach. If she doesn’t believe him he could be found out and frankly he knew jail wouldn’t be fitting hopefully she wasn’t like that and she would be more than excepting of him. He sits across from her clearing his throat.
“I just realized that I hadn’t told you my name, It’s James.”
“Well James, It’s nice to know your name. I hadn’t seen you around before today, you’re the guy that just moved into the house around the corner right?”
“Yeah, I just came on the train earlier today. I’m surprised I’ve met anyone so far actually I wasn’t expecting it.”
She started on about how she was glad he had stopped in and continued on about how the day-to-day stuff she did in town. He was slowly falling in love with her hanging onto everything that came out of her mouth. He had never met anyone like this before. As their conversations carried on even after the date ended they fell deeper for each other. His fear she would not except him was quelled on their tenth date when she mentioned she had figured it out on her own.
Over the years growing further eventually marrying in 1976 after he was able to legally change his name. They adopted four children who grew up to be more wonderful than he could ever imagine but something had stuck with him from all the way back before the train ride. His father's small comment to 'make him proud'. He knew his father might not have been proud of who he had become but looking at his beautiful wife handling his young grandchildren he realized that it didn’t really matter because he was proud of himself.