Work Text:
my heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue
all's well that ends well to end up with you
swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover
and you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me
and at every table, I'll save you a seat, lover
It was weird to be back in Paris after all those years.
Marinette bit her bottom lip to not cry from all the turmoil of emotions burning inside her chest as she looked around, at her old room, which was still the same after all the time she stayed away in Italy. She sighed, a bittersweet feeling swelling inside her, as she sat on her bed and let go of her suitcase handle.
After the fall of Monarque, Marinette needed some time far from Paris and all its aftermath. She stayed for a few months and supported Adrien the best she could, without telling him that she was the one who put his father in prison, but suddenly, it was too much.
The fact that Tikki went inactive after her using her lucky charm during that fight made everything worse. She lost her kwami, her role as Ladybug, and her partner.
Chat showed up a few times after the final fight, and he begged his lady to show up in every interview because he needed to see her. He didn’t know about her earrings going black after her last call of “lucky charm,” since he was passed out by her side.
He didn’t know the despair and anger she had in her voice when she screamed the power that gave her the chance to destroy Monarque and save the kwamis from his grasp - and how the amount of magic in it was to the point of inactivating her earrings.
The only way was to wait until Tikki was able to recover - and she knew all of that because Plagg went to her in the middle of the night when she took her earrings off and put them inside the box Master Fu gave her a long time ago.
So, that’s what she did. For a year, two, ten. She was twenty-five now and Tikki was still not back. When she turned sixteen, she got a scholarship from a fashion school in Milan and didn’t hesitate to accept.
Living in Paris, without being able to fly with her yo-yo, to laugh and patrol with her chaton, to be Ladybug, was too much. She was tired of hiding how her heart was bleeding.
Alya, Nino, her parents, and Adrien took her to the airport. She cried while saying goodbye to everyone, but when it was Adrien’s turn, she looked at him with eyes full of tears and couldn’t smile. She felt so guilty for all she had done to him and how she couldn’t tell him anything about it. He cupped her cheeks with both of his hands and put his forehead against hers.
She closed her eyes, just feeling his warmth and breath against her lips. They didn’t trade a word, but it was like they shared everything they needed to share. He still didn’t know she was Ladybug, she still didn’t know what was inside his heart and brain at that moment, but she could feel all the love and care he felt for her at that moment.
And then his lips were on hers and she kissed him back, embracing him, her fingers wrapping around his hair as she sighed against his lips when they broke the kiss.
“Come back for me soon,” he whispered.
“Before you can miss me,” she lied.
And he believed her words.
As much as she missed her parents, her friends, and Adrien, she didn’t want to come back so soon. One night sleeping in her room was enough to make all the feelings that she locked inside a chest deep inside her heart come back.
While trying to sleep, staring at the ceiling and the silly glowing stars she put up when she was younger, she caught herself whispering her transformation phrase more than one time. She could feel her heart squeezing every time the earrings burned, trying to come back to life, but nothing happened after it. It was as dead as before.
As ever.
She didn’t want to come back. She didn’t want to have hope that she would see Tikki and Chat Noir again. She didn’t want the hopeless feeling that she buried deep down and to find it again. But it was Alya’s wedding and she couldn’t say no to her. For the first time since she left Paris, she would spend Christmas in the city of lights - the city where she grew up, fell in love, and had her heart broken.
Cursing her lack of sleep, she threw her blankets away and sat up. She grabbed her phone to check the hour and sighed, ignoring all the notifications, except Alya’s. She let her friend know she was in Paris and that she was excited to see her tomorrow at the hair salon.
Marrying close to Christmas was a wild move, but Marinette knew that Alya did it so that her and Nino’s families could join the event. With Nora traveling around the world as a fighter and Noël’s shows, a date that could bring all of them together needed to be close to a holiday.
And what better than Christmas, huh?
Marinette sighed and threw herself back until she lay on her bed, staring at the ceiling once again. She knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep well that night, her body finding her old bed not comfortable enough, the memories and feelings of her old life, the overwhelming emotion of being back, even if it was just for four days.
Groaning and giving up on trying to get at least some hours of decent sleep, she got up and changed, putting on comfortable clothes and her black winter jacket. She put on a beanie to protect her head, gloves, and her favorite flat boots. She made sure she had her ID card and phone inside her pockets and left her room, grabbing her key on the kitchen counter before leaving her old house.
Her parents were sleeping since they had to finish the cake and the other things Alya ordered for the wedding. Almost everything was set already, but they still wanted to wake early to make sure it was all perfect for Alya and Nino.
It was nearly nine at night, but the streets were still full of life, even with the snow falling and the cold wind blowing. Marinette put her hands inside her pockets and walked around, watching people interacting and strolling about, chatting and enjoying the chilly but still cozy night.
She heard kids screaming and laughing and walked slowly, noticing them running around with snowballs in their hands, throwing them at their friends as they had a huge snowball fight. Marinette giggled and stopped, watching for a while.
It was good to be back, even if she didn’t want to be. And everything was calm, until…
Until it wasn’t.
Because coming out from behind a tree covered in snow, holding a snowball and a huge grin on his lips, was Chat Noir.
She froze, without knowing what to do or how to react as she watched her old partner, her love, her soulmate, her other half running around as he laughed and played with kids he barely knew, but took care of as if they were his own.
He was wearing the ice suit, slightly different from their time as teenagers. His hair was short, his suit with more green details, the bell no longer there but the cat ears still in place.
His grin was still the same and the sound of his laugh made a tear slide down Marinette’s right cheek.
She needed to leave right now or she would throw up with all the guilt and desire to run to him and embrace him and never let him go and-
Okay. Okay, she could do that. She could ignore the sound of his laugh and the free way he was running around, dodging snowballs and chasing after kids, and just leave. She did it once, she could do it once again.
Using all of her strength, Marinette turned around and started to walk back the way she came, looking down to avoid people’s eyes on her and her distressed expression. She was on the verge of crying and didn’t need people staring at her because of that!
Then she felt something hit her back and even with her winter jacket, she felt cold.
“Hey, what the-” She turned around, angry, and then froze again when she noticed Chat approaching her with an apologetic smile.
“I’m sorry, mademoiselle, the kids and I got a bit exci-”
His eyes finally laid on her face and he swallowed hard as Marinette felt sweat running down her back.
It was five degrees celsius. Why was she sweating?
“Marinette,” he whispered her name and the way he did was so unfair to her that she couldn’t control the shiver that ran down her body. He said her name like he missed her, like he was so happy to finally see her again, like-
Like she imagined he would call her “my lady” if Tikki ever came back.
“Hey,” she whispered, suddenly out of words. What was she supposed to say? She didn’t have any right to be happy to see him again because she was the one that left him behind without giving him her identity.
Chat, on the other hand, ran to her and embraced her in his arms, hiding his cold nose against her neck and sighing contently, making Marinette freeze for a second before her body reacted. She wrapped her arms around him and squeezed him as hard as he was squeezing her, letting his warmth and scent wrap around her and giving her all the sweet memories she carried of him.
“I’m so glad you’re back,” he whispered.
She didn’t have the heart to tell him she wasn’t back, so she just moved her body to look into his eyes and gave him a smile that she prayed was confident enough. He brushed his thumb over her cheek and she closed her eyes, sighing.
The moment was ruined, though, because Chat yelped like a little girl when he was hit by a snowball. He turned around and watched as the kids giggled and approached him, grabbing his hands and begging him to keep playing. He looked at Marinette, desperate, but she chuckled.
“Go play with the kids, Chat. I’m staying with my parents. You can come visit if you want.”
“Are you making cookies?”
She laughed and blamed the cold for the blush on her cheeks.
“I will.”
“I’ll visit then,” he said and she nodded, watching as the kids finally won the fight against Chat’s stubbornness and dragged him back to the battlefield.
She watched him for a while and sighed, putting her hands inside her jacket pockets and wishing again that she could have Tikki back.
It was finally Christmas Eve - and Chat Noir didn’t show up.
Deep down, Marinette was glad because she wanted to get ready to talk with him. After all, she decided she would tell him she was Ladybug and needed a way to prove it to him in case he didn’t believe her words.
She also needed to work on her explanation of why she left Paris and him, too, and a good apology for that.
So, she finally slept that night and woke to the delicious scent of freshly baked croissants. She didn’t even care about changing and stayed in her silly Chat Noir pajamas as she went to the kitchen to eat something. She could be human when it was time to go to the hair saloon Alya rented for the wedding.
Barely opening her eyes, since she was still tired from all her emotions and jet lag, Marinette poured a huge mug of coffee and took a croissant from the basket on the counter. She bit the croissant and groaned happily, the delicious taste of home filling her mouth.
“Fuck, I forgot they were so good,” she mumbled.
“The best, right?”
Marinette screamed and thank Tikki she wasn’t holding her mug, because she jumped so high and moved her arms in her weird way of acting that the croissant basket was on the floor.
She looked up as she tried to control her heart beating but it got faster when she noticed she was face to face with none other than Adrien Agreste, the love of her young life.
“Oh, sorry, Marinette, I didn’t mean to-” He started as he crouched to pick up the croissants.
“I’m so fucking clumsy!” She whimpered as she also bent down to help him.
Their foreheads hit and they groaned with pain as Marinette’s butt hit the floor. She closed her eyes, wishing the floor could swallow her, when Adrien called her name. When she opened them, his hand was the first thing she saw.
He was offering it to help her raise. She looked up at him and felt her heart going crazy the moment her eyes landed on his kind smile and the soft way he was looking at her, the same way it beat when he offered that umbrella for her, so many years ago.
Like Chat had offered her his hand soon after she lost the miraculous box.
Marinette took his hand and he helped her to get up. After making sure she was okay, she asked if he wanted coffee and he accepted a mug.
“What are you doing here?” She asked as she gave him the cup.
“Oh, I came to drive you to Alya’s,” he took a sip of his coffee. “Hmm, it’s delicious as always.”
“Wait, to Alya’s?” Marinette frowned.
Adrien blinked, caught by surprise.
“Did… she not tell you I was picking you up…?”
“She didn’t, or else I wouldn’t be wearing pajamas in front of you!” She blushed as she got her phone. She was ignoring the number of notifications because she wasn’t in the mood to be social, but maybe she should, at least, check Alya’s text messages, because she texted Marinette seven times to let her know that the hair salonl asked Alya and her guests to arrive sooner and that Adrien was picking her up. “Ah, fuck, she did.”
“Well, I have to be there with you in ten minutes, so you don’t have to worry much.”
“What do you mean ‘don’t worry much’? I’m so fucking late,” she put her mug and croissant on the counter and ran to the stairs. “I’ll be back in five minutes.”
“Hey, Marinette,” he called when she started to run up the stairs. Marinette stopped, almost tripping again, and turned to him with raised eyebrows. “I forgot you’re such a Chat Noir fan. Beautiful pajamas.”
She looked down and grimaced when she saw her outfit. She ran to her room and ignored the laugh behind her.
Okay, Marinette must confess. She never thought that a Christmas-themed wedding could be so beautiful, as Alya and Nino’s was.
First, instead of using the traditional red, green, and gold colors that were so normal for Christmas, they picked green and orange as their colors. Marinette knew the reason behind that and praised their choice, crying a bit when she hugged Alya.
The hall was beautiful with Christmas trees and mistletoes decorating the ceiling and floor. The chairs had orange and green ribbons and on the table, tiny Christmas gifts and garlands could be found.
The men were wearing orange ties and the ladies were wearing green dresses, except for Alya and Nino. Both of them were wearing white, but Nino’s tie was also orange and Alya had green ribbons adorning her hair.
Love songs were playing, people were chatting and dancing and everything was beautiful and perfect as they planned. And they planned so, so well, that it was no surprise that Adrien was her partner.
In the beginning, she was old Marinette. Babbling and stumbling, but Adrien was a gentleman, as always. He held her while they walked to the altar, held her hand during the ceremony, and even handed a polka dot handkerchief to her when she started to cry from happiness. She didn’t comment on the fact that he also had tears and should use the handkerchief too.
She watched from a distance as he talked with Nino and Max, laughing and chuckling. He was beautiful with his black suit and stupid well-made hair and beautiful smile and-
She swallowed her drink in a gulp and put the glass on her table, sighing once again.
“Why don’t you go to him?” Alya asked as she sipped her drink, laughing when her best friend put her elbows on the table, miserable.
“And say what? ‘Hi Adrien, the reason why I ran away even after you kissed me and asked me to come back soon was that I put your father in jail and I was dealing with this guilt, but after therapy and being far from you for some years, I feel better about it enough to want to have a relationship? Oh, by the way, I’m Ladybug and I still have a tiny crush on Chat Noir, who doesn’t know who I am.’”
“You forgot to add you can’t transform because Tikki is dormant.”
“Urgh, Alya,” she let her head fall and laid her cheek on the table. “Why does everything need to be so intense for me?”
Alya giggled and caressed her back, lowering until she was eye to eye with Marinette.
“Because you make everything more complicated. Just go to Adrien, dance with him, talk, and when you think you both are ready, tell him you’re Ladybug.”
“What if I ruin everything?”
“You’re Ladybug. You can fix it,” she winked and kissed Marinette’s cheek. “I’m going to drag my beloved to the dance floor. Why don’t you do the same, huh?”
“I’ll think about it,” Marinette smiled and watched as Alya walked to Nino. He cupped her cheeks and kissed her and Marinette smiled, feeling her eyes getting wet.
She was so happy for Alya, her friend deserved it.
Marinette was still watching Nino and Alya go to the dance floor like a fool and didn’t realize Adrien was approaching her until it was too late to pretend she needed to go to the bathroom or something. She took a deep breath and smiled at him.
“Hey,” she whispered and he offered his hand with a nervous smile.
“Do you want to dance with me?”
She blinked and he cleared his throat, nervous. Marinette moved on instinct, stretching her hand out so he could take it and help her raise. Her dress’ skirt pooled around her legs as they walked slowly to the dance floor, hands intertwined.
When they arrived, they got in position and started to dance slowly, Marinette feeling sweat already running down her spine. She was so tense in his arms that it was so weird to think that once, she really thought she belonged there.
Maybe all her fantasies were just that, fantasies. Maybe they were not meant to be together, that’s why all her plans failed and timing between them always made them further apart from the other. Maybe she was being silly to still believe that she had a chance with Adrien Agreste, especially after running away when he asked her to come back to him quickly.
She took forever and her chance now was gone and-
“You’re so beautiful. I never thought that green would look so good on you,” he whispered and Marinette’s lungs packed their suitcase and ran away from her body.
“D-do you think?” Marinette’s voice was low but she was glad she at least said something. Adrien smirked and heat consumed her body.
“I do,” he said and pulled her closer. She wrapped her arms around his neck, trying to ignore the fact that his mouth was too close to her mouth. His arms were safely wrapped around her waist as they moved to the sound of the music.
She swallowed hard, forgetting whatever she wanted to say to him right now. Instead, she watched as he looked at her in the softest way possible.
“You can relax, Marinette. It’s just me, your old friend, Adrien.”
“And you think this is going to help me relax?” She giggled and Adrien smirked. “You were my teenage crush, Adrien.”
“Well, then, let’s pretend we’re young and dumb again…” he slid his right hand down her arm and intertwined his fingers with hers. “Do you remember when we danced at Chloe’s party so many years ago?”
“I do,” she whispered as he brushed his mouth against her ear to talk.
“It was the first slow dance of my life,” he confessed and she shivered, squeezing his hand. “We were each other’s first in a lot of things.”
“Oh? Like what?” She whispered back. He moved his head to stare at her and put his forehead against hers.
“You are the first friend I made…” he raised his hand that was holding hers above their heads and spun her, pulling her closer. “And I was your first love.”
She smiled and tilted her head back so she could watch his smug reaction.
“I was the first person who could see how unhappy you were about obeying your father and traveling around the world with Lila,” she said, and she noticed the subtle sadness shining in his eyes when his father was mentioned. “And you were the first one that, instead of asking me to stay, supported my decision to go to Italy and come back when I was ready.”
He cupped her cheek, his face approaching hers and she held her breath, waiting for his next move.
“I was your first kiss,” he whispered and she could feel his lips brushing hers.
“Wrong,” she smirked and he moved his face back a bit, raising an eyebrow, surprised. “My first kiss was another boy,” she giggled, remembering the time she had kissed Chat to take him out from the akuma’s influence he was under.
“Are you sure?” He grinned and she frowned, her mind trying to make her realize something. “Because I am sure that you were the first girl I kissed,” he kissed the corner of her mouth and she squeezed his arms. “And you kissed me first.”
They stopped moving and stared at each other, a hundred silent words between them. Adrien looked up and then smirked, making Marinette look too.
They were under a mistletoe.
“Well, I think you know the tradition, huh?” He asked, his voice low and tempting. He looked to her, asking for her answer.
She moved her face closer to his.
He cupped her cheeks and brushed his thumbs on her skin as he brought his mouth closer to hers. Her hands were on his tie and she held it as she closed her eyes, just waiting for his kiss.
But before he could kiss her, she pushed him gently and moved her head down, panting as she wanted to throw up for the guilty feeling that was burning inside her chest.
She wanted him. She loved him. But not like this, not right now. She needed to be honest with him, she needed him to know who she was first and then he could decide what he wanted with her.
“I’m sorry, I- I need to tell you something first. I would hate myself if I let you continue with me being dishonest with you.”
“Okay, so tell me,” he smiled to show her he was okay. She shook her head and looked around. No one was paying attention to them, at all, but she needed them to be alone so she could pour her heart out and have a mini crying crisis.
“Not here. Come,” she grabbed his hand and walked fast to one of the balconies of the place.
The place was cold, but lit. No one was around. Everybody was enjoying the party inside the hall and this was perfect. Marinette kept walking fast, dragging Adrien with her and half ignoring his plea for her to walk slower or to explain to him what was happening.
When she was satisfied, she let him go and turned to him, squeezing her hands together as she took a deep breath and stared into him. She could feel her breath out of rhythm and her mind was a little bit unfocused, but she was ready, the words “I am Ladybug” on the tip of her tongue.
Instead of saying it, though, she gasped and felt Adrien approaching, cupping her face again and kissing her forehead. She sighed, relaxing as he embraced her.
“I’m here,” he said as he took a step forward, making her step backwards. They moved again, the same way, until she felt her back hit the cold stones of the balcony railing. His hands slid down by her side until he held her thighs and raised her up, making her yelp as she wrapped her arms around his neck and legs around his waist.
He put her on the railing and she held him by his hair, restraining him from moving as he panted and stared at her, his eyes widening as he swallowed hard, moving to her lips and then to her eyes.
“If you want us to talk, you shouldn’t be holding me like that,” he whispered and his voice was so hoarse it brought chills down Marinette’s body.
She blamed the cold wind.
Her hands moved to his face as she looked at his lips and licked her own, making Adrien groan. One of his hands held her neck while the other squeezed one of her legs, bringing her closer.
“Marinette,” he pleaded and she let him go, waking up from the spell she was under.
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s…” he took a deep breath and brushed a hand over his hair, pushing it back. “It’s just that I can’t think when you look at and touch me like that.”
She blushed and looked down. He put his hand under her chin and raised her head so she could be looking into his eyes, that burned with love and desire and so much more she couldn’t even name.
“Tell me what you have to.”
“Do you remember the time where I got sick and couldn’t go to class… and you brought me my homework and said that I could tell you what was happening?”
“Yes, I do.”
“That day, I almost told you my most deepest secret… And we were interrupted and it escalated and…” She took a deep breath. “The thing is that… I’m Ladybug,” she confessed and watched Adrien’s eyes growing wider. “Look, I… I can’t prove it right now because my kwami is in a hibernation state or something, but I can think about a way to prove it and-”
All the words she had planned to tell him later were silenced by his mouth against hers, as he kissed her fast. His hands were holding her head as he kissed her hard, fast, with love, desire, desperation. Marinette kissed him back with the same intensity, her arms wrapped around him as she brought him closer, making sure that the kiss lasted as they devoured each other and made sure all the feelings they felt for each other were in that kiss.
She broke it first, but Adrien’s mouth didn’t stop. He kissed her chin and moved to her neck and she closed her eyes, throwing her head back to give him more access. She relished the feeling and gasped when he brought his mouth to one of her ears, wrapping his mouth around the lobe and pulling it.
“H-how are you so okay with that?” She asked, a little out of air.
“I’ve known that you are Ladybug for a long, long time,” he said and moved so his forehead was against hers. His lips were swollen and his hair a mess made by her hands, but he looked happy and relieved.
Marinette’s expression, though, was fear and confusion.
“How did you know that?”
He brushed his lips against hers and smirked.
“Did you really think that Plagg wouldn’t realize Tikki was gone, my lady?”
Silence took over as they looked at each other, both consuming the words that just left Adrien’s mouth. And when his eyes were practically screaming at her to say something, Marinette started to laugh loudly.
“What is so funny?” He giggled, a little bit confused by her reaction to his confession.
Marinette, on the other hand, laughed more and cleaned her tears with her index fingers.
“You calling me ‘my lady.’ I don’t think Chat Noir woul- Fuck!” She screamed and then grabbed Adrien’s arms, shaking him. “How do you know about Plagg? Were… were you Cat Walker?”
“So, about that,” he looked away, a bit nervous. “Yes and no? The fact is that I am Chat Noir.”
Marinette was not amused and she crossed her arms, raising an eyebrow, which made Adrien throw his arms up, agitated.
“I need proof.”
“Proof? You just said you’re Ladybug and didn’t even try to prove it to me and now are you really asking for proof?”
“What do you expect? I was already tricked and lost all the miraculouses because I was too in love with you to realize that I was giving the dog miraculous to your cousin!” She babbled and Adrien smirked. “What?!”
“You were so in love with me that you forgot to be responsible for a moment, that’s so romantic!”
“Did… did you forget the hell we went through trying to get the miraculouses back?”
“Oh, we. Now do you believe I’m Chat?!”
“Oh my God, Adrien, I take back my words. I hate you, I’m not in love with you anymore and you’re probably Chat because only he could anno-mmmph!” She was interrupted with Adrien’s lips on hers, kissing her silly.
No. No, no, no. He was trying to distract her and she wouldn’t fall for his tricks anymo-
He bit her bottom lip and pulled, stealing a moan from her.
Ah, maybe just a little bit, she thought as she kissed him.
“Wait,” he pushed her back and she groaned, annoyed. “You believe I am Chat Noir now, right?”
“If I say yes, will you kiss me more?”
He chuckled and cupped one of her cheeks. She leaned into him and closed her eyes, melting at his touch. She was so lost in him that she didn’t notice that they were closer and that his hands were-
“Adrien,” she mumbled against his lips and he hummed, kissing the corner of her mouth. “Is… is your hand on my butt?”
He laughed and she joined him, shaking her head, exasperated. When they finally calmed down enough, she looked at him.
“It’s you, right? You’re mon chaton.”
“Always was… always am… always will be. Plagg was actually devastated when he couldn’t sense Tikki anymore. I transformed and ran around Paris, desperate, trying to find Ladybug or anything that could take me to her… you. And then, I heard you crying, Marinette, and mumbling Tikki’s name. When I ran to you, you were in an alley and so lost that I was so ready to jump to you and help you, but…” he swallowed hard.
“But…?”
“Alya found you first and you hugged her and screamed that you lost Tikki and couldn’t sense her. That she was gone. And I just confirmed you were Ladybug.”
“Why didn’t you tell me anything?”
“I was waiting for you to feel comfortable to share it with me, or even with Chat, but when you told me you were going to Milan, I… lost my faith that you would share. So I worked on supporting you the best I could.”
“Adrien…”
“But I think I was totally sure you were my lady the minute your lips touched mine at the airport. It took me everything not to grab your arm and keep you here with me and break down, cry, and beg for you to stay. But I knew why you were leaving, I always understood the reason why you needed to be far, and… and I never stopped believing you would come back when you felt you were ready.”
“I’m so sorry for leaving you and not explaining anything. I just… it was so painful, you know? And I felt so guilty and lost without Tikki and I wanted Chat so much,” she swallowed her tears. “I almost told you a hundred times, to be honest.”
“I know, my lady. But, look,” he raised her head with his hand under her chin. “We are together now, aren’t we?”
“We are,” she hugged him and they stayed quiet and still for some minutes that could have been hours. She then lifted her head to look into his eyes. “What now, mon chaton?” She asked, playing with his tie.
“I have a request, my lady. Stay with me,” he whispered against her mouth.
“I will,” she didn’t lie this time.
And he, once again, believed her words.
And she believed them too.