Chapter Text
Eddie Diaz dropped the last box on the kitchen table and followed it up with a jaw-cracking yawn. The day had been long, and he’d started to wonder if they’d ever actually finish unloading the U-Haul in the front yard. Moving felt like an endless job.
But finally, they were done. He looked up as his cousin, Miguel, walked in with a stack of pizzas in one arm. His wife, Carmen, followed on his heels with shopping bags.
“Oh, you didn’t have to do this!” Eddie said. “I should be buying your dinner.”
Carmen shrugged. “We’ve got you, Eddie. You can just help us in the future when we move,” she said with a wink.
Eddie grinned, shaking his head. “Of course. Anything you need. Thank you so much for all your help.” He paused, shaking his head to look around at his life packed away in boxes. “There’s no way this would have gone as smoothly without your help. Thank you.”
Miguel clapped him on the back before opening a pizza box. Carmen pulled him into a hug. “You’re family, and we’re glad to have you and Christopher here with us. This will be such a good move for you both, querido .”
Eddie smiled again and started rooting around for the box with plates and cups. Carmen had brought disposable, but he’d prefer to let them eat off real dishes after all their help.
The rest of the night passed quickly, and Eddie fell into bed with a relieved groan. He was grateful he’d had the forethought to have Chris stay with Pepa for the weekend. So much needed to be done the next day to get furniture set up and things unpacked enough to make the house safe and livable for Christopher.
Still, as he lay in bed, listening to the sounds of the house settling around him, he couldn’t be anything but grateful to finally be out of Texas and states away from his parents. They weren’t happy about him taking Christopher so far away from them. Still, Eddie knew it was the only solution if Chris was going to grow up exploring and pushing his boundaries to live the fullest life possible. They were only interested in coddling the boy because of his disability. Once Eddie had realized that and seen how they’d done their level best to undermine his ability to be a father to his son, he’d know that his only way through was out and away.
Even with all the stress and uncertainty that the move had introduced into their lives, Eddie felt a renewed sense of hope at being in the new space, in a new city, with new possibilities on the horizon. For the first time in a long time, he felt peaceful as he drifted off to sleep.
***
His peace was shattered the next day rather abruptly when his phone rang with Shannon’s ringtone.
Eddie took a deep breath and gently set the screwdriver he was using down before picking up his phone. No matter how mad he was at her, she was still the mother of his child. This was the first time he’d heard from her in over a year. Not since they’d finalized the custody and child support agreement for Christopher. While they’d never married, Christopher was still entitled to support from both of his parents, and Eddie desperately needed it while he continued healing and tried to figure out what to do with the rest of his life.
“Shannon,” he greeted flatly.
“Hi, Eddie,” Shannon replied. She sounded tentative at his subdued greeting. “I just found out you moved to L.A. You didn’t mention anything.”
Eddie ground his teeth together and counted to ten before he could answer calmly. “I haven’t heard from you in over a year, Shannon. Why would I mention a move to you?”
“You don’t think I have a right to know where my son is?” she huffed.
Eddie rolled his eyes. “Sure. I asked my lawyer to notify your lawyer that we were moving. It’s not my fault they didn’t tell you.”
“You could have told me yourself!” she argued, her voice rising with her emotions.
“You didn’t answer the phone the last time I tried to call you!” he shot back. “You haven’t spoken to your son since you left, Shannon. He’s stopped asking about you.”
The line went silent for a long moment as Shannon digested that. “Oh,” she finally said, voice quiet. “I just…I needed some time, Eddie. I never meant to hurt him.”
Eddie had very little sympathy for the woman who’d essentially ghosted her own son. “Well, that’s on you. You have to live with the consequences of your decisions, Shannon. You know that.”
“I know,” she whispered. “I’d like to see him.”
Sitting back on his heels, Eddie brought his other hand up to rub at the bridge of his nose. She had so much nerve. “I don’t know, Shannon.”
“I have a right to see him, Eddie.”
“Well, you hurt him. A lot. He didn’t get a choice in your leaving, so he’s going to get a choice about whether or not he wants to see you,” Eddie retorted. “And it’s not going to be for at least a few weeks. We just got here, and I haven’t even finished unpacking yet. Let us get settled, and I’ll talk to him.”
Shannon sighed. “All right. That’s fair. I’ll wait for him to be ready.” She cleared her throat and put on a bright tone. “So, how have you been?”
Eddie didn’t answer right away. He didn’t know how to answer her or if he even wanted to. There’d been no contact for so long, and now, suddenly, she wanted to catch up? He sighed. “Fine. Busy,” he said, voice clipped.
“Look, Eddie,” Shannon said. “I’m really sorry about the way I left and not answering when you tried to call. I shouldn’t have done that, and I’m sure it’s something I’ll regret for the rest of my life. But I’m trying now, all right? I know it’s not enough, but it’s all I’ve got.”
And Eddie was just suddenly tired of the conversation. Talking to her was wearing him out, and he wanted to be done with it. “Yeah. Was there anything else?”
“I met my soulmate!” she blurted.
Eddie grimaced. “I’m happy for you.”
“Thank you,” she said. “What about you? Have you met anyone?”
“With what time?” Eddie asked, shaking his head. “I’m not looking. I don’t really want or need a soulmate or a romantic partner. I just want to be the best father I can be for Christopher.” He had no idea why he was telling this to Shannon, of all people. If he had been honest with himself, there might have been a little bit of spite involved.
“Oh,” Shannon said, sounding uncertain. “I…I’m sorry to hear that, Eddie. It’s important to take care of yourself, too, though. You shouldn’t cut yourself off from finding someone to share your life with.”
Eddie didn’t respond right away. He was angry at her all over again. “Yeah, well. Not really your call to make. I gotta go. I’ll talk to Chris and see what he says about meeting with you.”
“Okay. Thanks, Eddie.”
“Yeah,” he said and hung up, not waiting for her reply.
Dumping the phone on the carpet with a dull thud, Eddie took a moment to just breathe through the emotions speaking with Shannon had riled up in him. It wasn’t any of her business if he wanted to find his soulmate or not. She’d lost any right to a say in his or Christopher’s life with her abrupt departure in the middle of the night while he’d still been injured and healing from his time in Afghanistan.
He hadn’t lied to her. Eddie had decided after she abandoned Christopher that the most important thing was making sure his son knew that Eddie would always be there. Christopher had to come first. There was no room for anything less, and Eddie had no desire to try to add a romantic relationship, soulmate or not, to that equation.
He just really hoped he never met his soulmate. That would make things so much easier.
***
Evan “Buck” Buckley slung his bag over his shoulder and sauntered into the firehouse with a spring to his step. His results from his most recent scan had been right on track with where he wanted to be for the upcoming hot firefighter calendar, and he couldn’t wait to share the news. Buck just knew he had a solid shot of getting selected this year.
And if he did, maybe he’d be lucky enough that his soulmate would see their mark and make contact.
He knew it was a slim chance and the odds were stacked against him, but Buck wasn’t getting any younger. He was tired of meaningless relationships and one-night stands. Buck wanted a family to call his own. He wanted someone he could count on to actually stay, and the person most likely to do that was the person the fates had matched him with.
Unfortunately, the rest of his colleagues weren’t as enthusiastic about his chances as he was. The way Hen disparaged the competition really got under Buck’s skin, but he understood her reaction. It was a bit misogynistic that it was restricted to hit male firefighters and not open to all firefighters.
“Okay, that is a beautiful man,” Chimney said, staring off behind Buck in the direction of the locker room.
Hen was gazing in the same direction when she spoke. “Where’s the lie? And I like girls.”
Buck turned to look over his shoulder and stared, transfixed by the sight of what had to be one of the most gorgeous people he’d ever seen with his own eyes pulling his shirt over his head.
But what really caught Buck’s eye was the mark on his lower right side. It looked like a line art calla lily had been tattooed into his skin, with a smattering of tiny dots in a starburst around it.
Buck had only ever seen it on his own body, but he knew that mark like the back of his hand. It was definitely the same as his.
He blinked once, gaze lingering on the mark for another moment, before he asked, “Who the hell is that?” His voice came out a little more gruff than he’d anticipated, and he grimaced, clearing his throat, as he turned to look back at his colleagues.
“That’s Eddie Diaz, new recruit. Graduated at the top of his class just last week,” Bobby said and continued on for another moment about how Eddie had a history of military service and other impressive things.
Buck’s focus was entirely on the man behind him. He kept flicking glances back over his shoulder, drinking in the other man’s appearance and wondering what he’d be like when they finally met. It was Eddie’s first day, though, and Buck didn’t want to completely derail it by announcing that they were soulmates, so he decided to wait and talk to Eddie about it at the end of the day. Buck felt mildly uncomfortable not sharing the news right away. It felt a little too close to lying for his comfort, but it felt like the right thing to do.
“Come on,” Bobby said. “I’ll introduce you.” He led the way into the locker room.
Buck trailed behind. His heart was racing at the thought of being so close to his soulmate. Keeping the knowledge to himself all day was going to be excruciating.
“Eddie, I want to introduce some of A-shift to you,” Bobby was saying when Buck got into the locker room. “This is Henrietta Wilson, one of our firefighter paramedics.”
“Hen,” the lady in question corrected with a glare at Bobby. “Only my mother calls me Henrietta when she’s mad.” She grinned at Eddie, holding her hand out. “Welcome to the team, Eight Pack,” she teased.
Eddie rolled his eyes and ducked his head as he grinned. “Heard about that, did you?” he asked, shaking her hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”
Buck was going to spontaneously self-combust. Eddie’s voice was as beautiful as the rest of him, and the way he’d turned bashful made Buck’s heart flutter at the cuteness. He completely missed Bobby’s introduction of Chimney, only tuning back in when Chim didn’t answer the question about where his nickname came from. Again.
“And this is Evan Buckley, our former probie.”
Everything froze for Buck when Eddie turned his gaze and his smile Buck’s way. Buck had no idea what was going on with his face, but whatever it was made Eddie’s smile falter, so Buck tried to get himself under control. His hand jabbed forward abruptly, and he forced his face to make something approaching a smile. This was the most important meeting of his life, and he was totally messing it up.
“Hey. Welcome,” he managed to get out as Eddie shook his hand with a dimmed smile.
“Hey. Nice to meet you?” Eddie asked, voice lilting up at the end like he wasn’t entirely sure.
Buck hated that he’d put that little question in Eddie’s voice. The rest of the crew were looking at him with varying degrees of confusion. Bobby seemed mostly disappointed if the line between his eyes was anything to go by. Buck cleared his throat and made a more genuine smile appear.
“It is nice to meet you,” he said. “I was just surprised. Cap didn’t say we were getting anyone new today,” Buck tried to explain with a half-truth. “But, seriously, welcome to the team. It’s really nice to meet you.”
Buck cringed slightly at how his voice sounded with that repetitive last statement. It gave far too much away, in his opinion. Eddie was probably getting emotional whiplash from this conversation.
Buck was making the worst possible first impression.
The silence hung in the air for a long moment that was quickly becoming awkward. Bobby clapped his hands together and, obviously trying to get the mood back where he wanted it, enthusiastically said, “Who wants breakfast? Buck, you’re on potatoes. Eddie, let me show you the loft.”
With that, he led the way out of the locker room, Eddie on his heels. Hen and Chim both tossed Buck confused, yet amused, glances at him as they walked past. They both knew what it meant to get potato duty from Bobby. He was in the potato dog house.
Buck didn’t move for a long moment, sighing to himself. This was not going how he’d hoped. With one last shake of his head, Buck moved over to his locker to deposit his stuff. It was going to be a very long day, but at least he had talking to Eddie at the end of it to look forward to. Maybe then he’d be able to explain some of the initial meeting awkwardness away with the soulmate knowledge.
***
Eddie didn’t know what to make of his first day. Everyone had been welcoming, drawing him right into the group like he’d always been there. That part had been amazing. It reminded him a bit of being in the service, and it was really good to have that kind of camaraderie back. He hoped it lasted.
What he didn’t get was Evan Buckley’s reaction to him that morning. The guy, who was apparently called Buck by everyone, had been bizarre when they’d first met. Eddie wondered what his deal was. He supposed it was possibly some sort of job insecurity, but that didn’t seem quite right. Since then, Buck had been hot and cold by turns, and Eddie had caught him staring several times.
Was Buck attracted to him and not sure how to deal with it?
As he considered it, that possibility made more sense than job insecurity. Buck’s voice had gone a bit husky when he’d said it was nice to meet Eddie, and Eddie had felt a little flutter at how it sounded. When he’d first laid eyes on the guy, pulling them away had been nearly impossible. The slightly taller man was broad and strong in all the right places and had killer blue eyes. The little birthmark over one eye was an intriguing spot that Eddie could almost imagine running his lips over.
Abruptly, Eddie caught the direction his thoughts were wandering and cleared his throat.
“Not on the agenda,” he murmured sternly to himself. Romantic entanglements were something he was staying away from. And at work, of all places? That would just be asking for problems.
So, no. Buck was off limits, even for a casual hookup.
Besides, with the way Buck acted, Eddie wasn’t sure if he was even open to being with another man.
Shaking his head, Eddie got back to familiarizing himself with the layout of the ambulance. As he had medic experience from his time in the army, he’d be pulled into the rotation to assist as needed with medical calls. Knowing where everything was kept would be an essential part of the response timing in every case.
Before he got much further, the alarm rang, and he ran with the rest of the crew over to the rig for the medical call.
“The call is a slip and fall in the kitchen with a head injury,” Bobby said. “Caller says that the victim is unconscious and has stopped breathing. They’re performing CPR now. Two minutes out. Eddie, you’re with Hen and Chim on this one.”
Eddie nodded, and the rest acknowledged the call. The trip was short but tense. Such a simple accident could have life-altering consequences for the victim and their family. It had only escalated with the victim’s failure to keep breathing on their own.
Once they arrived, everyone grabbed gear and rushed inside. The woman that answered the door was sobbing.
“He’s this way,” she said and ran towards the back of the house.
They followed after her, Chimney and Hen in the lead as Eddie followed just behind with a bag of supplies. The victim was male and in his mid-thirties. His head of dark hair was lying in a puddle of blood on the kitchen floor. They immediately took over CPR efforts, and Hen pulled the defibrillator out to start charging it.
“Please help him. He’s my soulmate,” the woman was saying. Buck had moved closer to try to calm her down.
They struggled to get the man’s heart beating again, but they managed it finally and slipped an oxygen mask over his face to help ease the strain on his body and ensure he got enough after not breathing on his own for several long minutes.
Chimney and Hen rushed out with the stretcher to load it into the ambulance and take the victim to the hospital. The woman trailed after them, still sobbing and trying desperately to hold onto her soulmate in some way.
The rest of the crew cleaned up the scene as much as they could before loading back onto the truck. On the ride back, Eddie stared out the window, lost in thought.
Buck spoke out of the blue. “I feel so bad for her,” he said.
Eddie heard him, though, and looked at the other man. His eyes were glistening slightly with sympathetic emotion, and Eddie nodded. “Yeah.” He sighed and looked back out the window. “I really hope I never meet my soulmate,” he murmured to himself. He just couldn’t risk the possibility of bringing someone else into his and Christopher’s lives that might leave, whether they wanted to or not.
The rest of the ride back was silent, all of them lost in thought.
***
Buck was floored. He had no idea how to react to Eddie’s statement about not wanting to meet his soulmate. He felt gutted at the rejection without Eddie knowing he was his soulmate.
Lost in thought, debating whether or not he should say anything to Eddie now, they got back to the station. Buck didn’t move for a long moment, even after the rest of the crew had gotten out of the truck and started cleaning up.
Eddie didn’t know Buck was his soulmate. So, he hadn’t rejected Buck. He kept reminding himself of that as the uncertainty boiled inside him. He’d just rejected “his soulmate.” That wasn’t the same at all.
He made it through the rest of the shift in a daze before leaving to head back to the house he still shared with three other people. How he made it home without ending up in an accident was a mystery. Buck didn’t really remember the drive. One minute he was at work; the next, he’d pulled into the driveway.
As soon as he opened the door, his roommate Jason wandered out of the kitchen, scooping some kind of noodles into his mouth. “Your sister’s here,” he muttered as he wandered past.
Buck blinked. “What?”
Jason stopped and glanced back at him. “She’s in your room, I think? She showed up an hour ago.”
“Uh…okay?” Buck said and hurried away and up the stairs to his bedroom. He swung the door open, and sure enough, there was evidence of another person in the room. The shower was running in the bathroom, and Buck dropped his duffel bag in front of the dresser before walking over to knock on the door.
“Uh…Is that you, Maddie?” he called, hoping she could hear over the running water.
“Evan! Hi! Yeah. I’ll be right out,” she called back.
Buck stumbled away from the door and dropped onto the corner of his bed. What the hell was Maddie doing in his shower? In Los Angeles? Had something happened? At least he knew the postcards he’d continued sending despite radio silence on her part had done something good.
The door opened, and Maddie walked out, her hair wrapped up in what was probably his last clean towel. She looked good, though, and Buck was glad to see her, even if it was entirely unexpected.
“Hi, Maddie,” Buck said, giving his sister a look that he hoped conveyed his dumbfounded happiness clearly enough. He stood up and opened his arms.
She grinned at him and stepped in, wrapping her arms around him in one of the best hugs he’d had in a long time. “You’ve gotten so big!” she said.
Buck laughed. “You make it sound like I’m a kid, Mads.”
Squeezing again, she shook her head and then pulled back to look up at him. He definitely dwarfed her much smaller frame.
“It’s true, though! The last time I saw you, you were just a kid by comparison! You’re like a tree trunk now, Evan! This is all from being a firefighter?” she asked, stepping over and dropping down onto the mattress. She pulled her legs up to sit cross-legged next to him.
Buck shrugged and sat down next to her, turning his body to face her. “I mean, yeah. I gotta be able to do heavy rescue, you know? Plus, I like it,” he said, grinning. “Gotta admit, it looks good, right?”
Maddie laughed before her face settled into a gentle smile. She tilted her head to one side and gazed at him for a long moment that bordered on becoming uncomfortable. “I’ve really missed you, Evan.”
Buck glanced away for a moment, chewing on his lip. “I haven’t heard from you in three years, Maddie,” he said. He tried to keep any sort of accusation from his voice, but he knew it came through nonetheless.
With a grimace, Maddie nodded and pulled the towel off her head, letting her wet hair cascade down around her shoulders. “I know. I’m sorry about that.” She didn’t offer any other explanation for the lack of contact.
Buck frowned at her slightly. “Are you okay, Maddie? Where’s Doug?”
“Hopefully, far away,” she said, looking away from him. “I left him.”
Finally , Buck thought but kept it to himself. He’d never liked her husband. None of them had felt Maddie should have married Doug. He wasn’t her soulmate, and they hadn’t understood why someone so young was seemingly giving up on ever meeting the person who was. It was one of the few things that Buck and his parents had agreed on.
He knew there was more to the story than Maddie was sharing, but she seemed uncomfortable with the topic. “I’m glad you’re here,” he said.
“I’m just passing through,” Maddie said, avoiding his gaze still. “Thought I should stop by and see my baby brother while I had the chance.”
Buck frowned. “Passing through? Maddie…what’s going on? You know I’ll always be here for you. No matter what.”
She looked up at him and promptly burst into tears.
The whole story tumbled out. How Doug had been treating her for over a decade, how her self-esteem and self-confidence were in the gutter, how embarrassed she was to even be telling him the story. Maddie hadn’t wanted to involve him. There was nothing she’d ever wanted more than to keep Buck safe from Doug.
But something about seeing him, in the flesh, after such a long time, had broken a dam in her heart, and it all came pouring out. It was just too much to carry inside on her own any longer.
“Plus, you look like you can take care of yourself,” she admitted, sniffling slightly as she chuckled. “You’ve been all over the country and even down to South America since the last time I saw you.” Maddie looked at him, face red and still tear-streaked, but she was smiling that same proud smile he’d always loved from her. “I’m so proud of you, baby brother.
“Even if you are living in a house with three other people.”
A laugh startled out of Buck at the teasing compliment. “Hey! It’s practical! I work a lot, and on my days off, the house is usually empty anyway. It works out really well, and I’m saving a load of money. I’ve got enough for a down payment on something when I find a place I like.”
“So, you’re planning on settling here?” she asked, picking at the blue bedspread she was sitting on.
Buck nodded slowly. “Yeah. I’ve been pretty happy so far. I love my job. And…um,” he hesitated, wondering if he should say it after the story she’d just shared. “My soulmate just moved here.”
Maddie’s face went through a complex array of emotions, ending on happily surprised. “Evan! You met your soulmate!? That’s fantastic!”
He shrugged. “Kinda?” he muttered, scrunching his face up in doubt.
“How do you ‘kinda’ meet your soulmate?” Maddie asked, frowning. “That seems like a pretty straightforward thing.”
“I mean….I met him. He just, uh, didn’t meet me?” Buck tried to clarify. “I mean, he met me, but he doesn’t know I’m his soulmate.”
Maddie looked at him doubtfully. “I’m gonna need more than that.”
Buck sighed and looked down at his hands. “He’s the new probie at the station. I saw him putting his shirt on, and our mark was on his abdomen. It was the start of his first shift, so I decided not to say anything until after work.”
“Okay…so what did he say when you told him?”
“I, um. I didn’t tell him,” Buck said, dragging his hand over his neck.
“You didn’t tell him,” Maddie repeated flatly.
Buck shook his head. “Nope. We went on a call with soulmates. One of them had hit his head and stopped breathing. No idea if he’ll survive,” Buck explained. “And he said he hoped he never met his soulmate on the way back.” His voice caught on the last word as emotion flooded him at the memory.
“Oh, Evan,” Maddie said, reaching out to take his hand. “I’m so sorry that happened.” She paused for a moment. “But you still need to tell him.”
“But he doesn’t want me, Maddie. I don’t think I could handle him actually rejecting me to my face. This is better,” he said, trying to convince himself that he meant what he said.
“Evan. You don’t know for sure that that’s how he’d react. He said something in a fleeting moment of trauma.” Maddie sighed. “You don’t get to take that decision away from him.”
Buck swallowed thickly. “I know. I do know, but…” he trailed off, sighing. The feeling of rejection was already swirling in his gut. How could he stand it if Eddie actually said the words to him directly?
“He barely knows you, right?” Maddie asked. “So, give him a chance to get to know you. He’ll see how wonderful you are, and it’ll become super obvious that you two just fit together. Soulmates are supposed to be that way, right?”
“Yeah,” Buck said. “Yeah, they are. But that’s another thing, you know? I don’t want to pressure him into doing something he feels he should do but doesn’t really want.”
Maddie said nothing, just held out her hand, and gave Buck a look full of understanding. Buck took her hand in his and squeezed it gently. Despite her sudden and surprising appearance, he was very glad to see her. Even if they were sitting on the bed in his room in a house he shared with several other people.
It was so good to see her, and he was going to take her advice. Hopefully, he’d be able to talk her into staying in Los Angeles so they could get to know each other again. Buck had missed her. The postcards had been a poor bandage on that hurt, helping him by at least making sure she knew where he was when she was ready to reach out.
And here she was, so it had worked.
“Dinner?” he asked, hauling himself to his feet and pulling her up after as she agreed. His problems would hold for one more night while he got reacquainted with his sister.