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When the first flurries of snow began to blow in each year, Varian was filled with dread. It didn't matter that that fateful day in the blizzard was more than four years ago, it still stung like it had all just happened the moment the snow started falling each year.
This year, the first snow came while he was searching for a place to make camp with his three relatively new travel companions, Yong, Nuru, and Hugo. He had met each of them in the kingdoms he had visited so far and they had formed a makeshift team.
Varian saw his younger self in Yong, as if he were a little brother, and thought of Nuru as a wise older sister, despite being older than her. He got along great with both of them.
On the other hand, there was Hugo, who seemed like he got some kind of satisfaction from stoking Varian’s anger while simultaneously stroking his own ego. Varian avoided talking to Hugo as much as humanly possible because of this, which was a shame, given that they were both alchemists and would have plenty to bond over. However, until Hugo decided to get over himself, Varian couldn't see himself bonding with him at all.
Snow was beginning to accumulate on the ground by the time the four companions found shelter under a rocky overhang. Nuru, Yong, and Hugo started having an impromptu snowball fight, which Varian tried to ignore.
He knelt in the dirt and pulled his goggles over his eyes, hoping to start a fire as quickly as possible using the minimal wood they had collected during the day's travels.
As he was digging for a vial of his firestarter solution, someone pegged him right between the shoulder blades with a rather icy snowball. “Gah!” he cried, “Can't you guys see I'm a little busy here? Also, that kind of hurt.”
“And what are you going to do about it, huh?” Hugo said mischievously, stepping in front of Varian and forming another snowball between his gloves.
“I'm going to start this fire and ignore the fact that you're trying to upset me.” He found the vial he was looking for, poured it over the wood, and added a vial of what he called his “activator solution.” The fire burst to life.
Hugo promptly reached over and smashed his newly formed snowball on top of Varian’s head. Varian gritted his teeth, trying to keep his cool. Normally, he would have been able to stay calm, but the presence of the snow - not to mention having snow on him - had him in a grim mood.
“For goodness's sake, Hugo! Why are you hellbent on pissing me off?!” he yelled.
Hugo shrugged nonchalantly. “You're cute when you're angry,” he replied with a wink.
“Oh, I could change your mind about that,” Varian hissed.
Hugo was quick to counter, “I'd like to see you try.”
“I'd rather not. Plus, I don't have the necessary weaponry to prove my point.” Images of amber guns and automatons flashed through Varian's mind.
“Sounds like an excuse to me,” Hugo challenged.
“Gah! I'm not going to get into a fistfight with you again. You'll just beat me to a pulp and rub it in my face for days.” Varian crossed his arms over his chest defensively.
Mockingly, Hugo ruffled Varian's hair, sending chunks of snow in all directions, and delivered his next dig at him. “Well, I'll just stand by my point that angry Varian is adorable until you manage to convince me otherwise… which you won't.”
“You do realize that my job back in my kingdom is to literally design and produce chemical and mechanical weapons, right?”
“Yeah, yeah, whatever,” Hugo scoffed. “But do you realize that all I did was throw a snowball at you and you're threatening me with chemical warfare? Why couldn't we just have a normal snowball fight like Nuru and Yong? That's all I was trying to do… this time, at least.”
“Because I can never tell with you!” Varian snapped. Muttering mostly to himself, he added, “…I also hate the snow.”
“Ohhhh-kay then, well, uh, good talk, I guess, and I'm just gonna go get back into our little snow battle over there…” No longer interested in continuing the argument, Hugo backed away, his hands raised in surrender, and ran off to join the others, leaving Varian alone under the overhang with the fire and his thoughts.
He hugged his knees to his chest and tried to think about anything but blizzards and amber and broken promises and automatons, but those were the only things his mind seemed to go to. The tears came before he could even try to stop them. He just hoped the others wouldn't see him like this and would just keep chucking snowballs at each other.
Meanwhile, Hugo stalked back over to his other two companions. “He said no - very adamantly - and threatened me with chemical weaponry,” he reported.
“Let me guess, you tried to pick a fight with him in the process,” Nuru said, rolling her eyes and pitching a snowball in Yong's direction.
“All I did was throw a couple of snowballs at him and he blew up at me. And then I asked him what the deal was and he muttered something about hating the snow, so I just let him be.”
“He looks really sad over there, Hugo,” Yong observed. “Maybe you should go tell him you're sorry.”
“He's probably not sorry,” Nuru said, half-joking and half-serious.
Hugo stared at Varian, huddled under the overhang with his knees tucked into his chest and his face hidden in his arms. “Well, I wasn't exactly sorry, but I didn't mean to make him feel down and out like that… just mess with him a little… so…”
“…so you probably owe him an apology,” Nuru finished for him.
Yong lobbed a snowball at Hugo, hitting him on the arm. “I'm with Nuru. You should talk to him.”
“Okay, I think you're right.” Rubbing his sore arm, Hugo trudged through the gathering snow back to the overhang. Silently, he sat down next to Varian.
“What do you want now?” Varian snapped, voice thick with tears.
Hugo surprised himself with the waterfall of words that flowed from him in response. “I actually just wanted to make sure you're alright… and to apologize. I didn't realize that snow wasn't really your thing… I also know that I'm not really your thing, but I really was just trying to get you to lighten up and have some fun with us.”
Varian didn't say anything at first, gathering his thoughts. “I'm sorry, too. I went off on you for what probably seemed like no reason to you.”
“Well, I'm sorry for always trying to grind your gears. I always thought your reactions were funny, but I can tell you're really hurt this time. I feel bad.”
“It's- it's okay… I guess… if it was just all in good fun or whatever. It's easy to take insults to heart, though, so maybe you ought to think about that.”
Normally, Hugo would have countered that with some snarky remark, but he hadn't seen Varian like this before. “I'm sorry. I didn't realize how much it hurt you.” They sat quietly for a bit until Hugo could wait to ask no longer. “Goggles, what's the deal with the snow thing? Like is there a reason you hate it so much?”
Varian sighed heavily, then the words began to pour out. “I used to love it. Then a few years ago, this massive blizzard came to Corona… we're talking historic proportions. I was conducting some experiments that day that my dad didn't exactly approve of and he caught me. One of the solutions I was working with went out of control while we were arguing and he ended up encased in impenetrable amber.
“I panicked and ran all the way to the castle through the storm, only to be refused help and sent away. I became enraged and plotted my revenge against the kingdom that had failed me. I ended up attacking the royal family and got thrown in jail.
“The rest of the story is even more long and complicated - I broke out of jail, aided in a coup, turned on the rebels when our plans didn't align anymore, got pardoned, and finally had access to the necessary magic to get my father out of the amber over a year after the incident. It's a wonder he was still alive in there.
“All that is to say, anytime I'm in the snow, it reminds me of that day when everything went to shit. Sorry, that was probably more of an explanation than you needed.” Varian shrank in on himself, unable to meet Hugo's eyes and unsure of how he might react. He knew Hugo had a criminal background of sorts, but he was more of a petty thief than a full-blown traitor.
For the better part of a minute, the never-speechless Hugo didn't say anything, and Varian was afraid he'd said too much and that Hugo would either make fun of him or think he was crazy. He told himself he didn't care what Hugo thought, but then again, he had just given him a ton of potential insult fuel.
Finally, Hugo broke Varian out of his spiraling thoughts. “You've been through a lot, huh?” It sounded like a genuine question, not a sarcastic jab.
“You could say that.”
“I've gotta say, I admire the lengths you were willing to go to to save your dad.”
“I shouldn't have turned to straight up villainy, though.”
“I don't know… ‘Varian the Villain’ was probably a pretty interesting guy. I wouldn't have minded meeting him.”
“Well, sorry to burst your bubble, but you won't ever get to meet him, because I'm never going back to that life. I still haven't forgiven myself for most of what I did back then.”
“I can understand that. I'm not proud of a lot of the things I've done,” Hugo admitted.
“Oh, really?” Varian said sarcastically. “The Prince of Arrogance himself has things he's not proud of?”
“Everyone does… But yeah, I've certainly done my share of questionable things that I would take back in a heartbeat if I could. That's not how life works, though, so I just try to do better going forward.”
“That's how I try to look at things, too. If I can't undo the past, I can improve in the here and now and make a better future.”
“And I think you're well on your way to doing that,” Hugo said with a level of kindness that shocked Varian. “I mean, you stopped at nothing to save your dad, and now you’re stopping at nothing to save your mom. It shows how caring of a person you are.”
Varian lifted his head and met Hugo’s eyes. “Thanks, Hugo. You know, when you’re not picking fights with me, you’re an alright guy.”
“I only pester people I like. Sorry that it came off the wrong way,” Hugo replied, a bit lost in the way Varian’s bright blue eyes caught the firelight.
“You might want to consider choosing a different method of showing people you like them, then,” Varian said and grinned at Hugo, who blushed bright pink. Varian made a mental note of this, wondering what Hugo meant by “like,” and Hugo began to internally consider foregoing the mission Donella had sent him on in favor of helping Varian with his.
Nuru and Yong finished their epic snow battle and joined them by the fire. “How are things over here?” Nuru asked, sending a knowing look Hugo’s way.
“Never better,” Hugo replied, his smile as bright as the fire itself.