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"He was whistling. That motherfucker said he hasn't been sleeping and gave me this whole bullshit song and dance about being self-sufficient, blah blah blah, and then he whistled, like he was one of the goddamn seven dwarfs or something."
Jesse was pacing around the office and Mike knew there wasn't much he could say to calm him down. In a way, this made it easier for what Mike was about to propose.
"He's oblivious to reality, I know. It's becoming a much bigger problem than I anticipated. But I have a plan. We can fix this."
"I don't know, man. I don't know how much longer I can keep doing this. It's all bullshit. Todd took that kid out right in front of us and Mr. White doesn't have a care in the world. He's changed, man. I don't know what happened, but he changed. And I can't be a part of it anymore."
Sometimes--not all the time, but every now and then--Jesse reminded Mike of Matty.
On the surface, they were total opposites. Matty would have never sold drugs. Fuck, he'd never even do drugs. They drug tested in the academy and Matty's goal was always to be a cop. He never wanted to be a firefighter or a teacher or a lawyer--he wanted to be a cop, and a father, and a husband.
He only had all of those things for two years before it all came to a tragic end.
If Matty ever met Jesse, he probably would have complained to Mike later that Jesse's lack of morals was what's wrong with this country today. He hated drug dealers, he hated drug manufacturers, and he avoided it all like the plague.
But Jesse also possessed some kind of strange innocence that both appealed to and infuriated Mike. He could see now that the blindfold was starting to come off. That his complete and utter faith in Walter White was beginning to crumble. Finally. Finally, he could see what Walter was really all about--greed. That was it. Nothing more, nothing less. Pure, disgusting, useless greed.
Mike understood it to a point, though, and it made him sad. It depressed the hell out of him, actually. Because Matty believed in Mike as much as Jesse believed in Walter. Jesse put him on a pedestal. The same pedestal Matty wanted to think Mike had been propped up on all his life, until literally the very end of it. And now Jesse was quickly catching up with reality, and it was about to hit him right between the eyes. Mike sympathized, he really did. But... it was about time.
He watched now as Jesse sank down into the chair in front of the desk, covering his eyes and sighing. Jesse never wanted this life. He never wanted to be a criminal mastermind. He never wanted or needed millions of dollars. He just wanted to screw around with his friends, bang hot women, drive cool cars, and, yes, make a name for himself on the streets. Mike despised Walter for plenty of reasons, and ruining Jesse's life was right there near the top of the list.
"Look, if you really want out, you need to listen to me. I'm out, too--I have to be. I've been tailed every day for weeks now. The DEA is after my ass and they're not going to stop until they can throw me in the slammer. Or in the ground."
"Yeah? You really think we can get out of this?" Jesse sounded hopeful. Too hopeful.
"I do. I have a connection that will buy our share of the methylamine. We can get out with close to ten mill--five each."
"Fuckkkk," Jesse said, shaking his head. "I don't even know what I'd do with that kind of cash."
"You'd get the hell out of dodge is what you'd do. Leave. Don't come back."
Later, out by the river, they'd talk about where exactly Jesse would go. For now, they both just took a minute to think about it. To think about their impending freedom. They were getting out. They were both going to be free.
"I need you to really think about this before we talk to Walter about it, kid. I'm serious. He's not even going to try to change my mind, we both know that. He's going to focus on you and intimidating you back to his side. You have to stay strong. Do not bend over for him."
Jesse scoffed, as Mike knew he would. "What? You think I'm his bitch or something? That asshole doesn't own me. Fuck him."
"Mm-hmm. Just keep that in mind when he gets in your face and does the whole Heisenberg routine."
"I will." Mike just shook his head and chuckled. "I will, Mike. You watch."
Matty would have done the same thing. He would have made every promise that those boys on the squad didn't scare him, that he could stand his ground, that he would stick to his closely guarded morals. He would have done anything to make Mike believe him. And he would. He would believe him, because he was his son and he loved him and he wanted what was best for him.
Their conversation is interrupted by the sound of a car pulling into the parking lot. Fuck. He was early. Mike wasn’t expecting Walter for another hour or so.
Jesse immediately started pacing again, and Mike understood how nervous he was. How he could talk all he liked about standing up to Walter and making his own choices and finally getting out of the business. But when it came down to it, he was scared. He looked up to Walter. His teacher, his mentor. His father figure, maybe? Whatever the hell else he was to Jesse.
He recognized it because he saw it in Matty’s eyes, too. He saw it every time Matty thought he was going to disappoint him. When he got a bad grade or had an expensive accident with the car. It would crush Mike every single time, and ultimately, he knew--just had a feeling--that Jesse was going to break his heart the same way.
“Hello?” Walter says as he makes his way into the office.
Mike glanced at Jesse one more time. Jesse nodded. He was ready. He could do this.
Sometimes--not all the time, but every now and then--Jesse reminded Mike of Matty.