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Ever since Yuri’s sister and her good-for-nothing husband agreed that Yuri was at least sufficient enough at babysitting (their criteria was dangerously low: no destruction of property, no injuries, no sugar past 9), he was somehow recruited into watching the little brat from Loi-Loi’s first marriage when there was no one else (read: Franky) available. It was happening more than Yuri was comfortable with; he didn’t really like kids on account that they were all too slow mentally and physically for him, but he especially found Anya more annoying than she probably was.
She had taken to calling his babysitting duty Unkie Days and seemed happy to spend time with him, despite the number of times they got on each other’s nerves because he actually took her out to activities that were supposed to stimulate children’s intellect, as opposed to Franky just letting her watch TV at home.
Uncle and niece had a long afternoon at the park, despite the cold weather. Anya chased around a bunch of wild animals that should have concerned Yuri but he didn't really think they were a threat to her safety. Just as they were about to leave before it got too cold and dark, Anya spotted the ice cream truck pull up and she begged Yuri to but her a cone. Yuri was a bit apprehensive to give her anything sweet considering the last time he saw her, she was crazed from a sugar-high, but ultimately he relented.
As Yuri reached up the give the ice cream vendor the payment for the two cones, Anya tugged at the hem of Yuri’s coat. Yuri gave her an inquiring look.
“Do real people die, unkie?”
Yuri stared at his niece like she’d grown a second head. “What exactly do you mean by ‘real people’?”
“Mama and papa, or you or me or uncle Scruffy. Because Bondman dies sometimes in the show, and Lieutenant Penguin also died. Do real people die, too?”
Yuri surmised that she must have meant real-life people, and halted his answer before it carelessly slipped through his lips. Kids Anya’s age were not as desensitized to death as children of war like he and his sister were. What was he supposed to tell her? What was he allowed to tell her without her parents present? “Ah, you better ask your dad that question. He seems like he can explain it to you. Me, I’d just scare you.”
Anya was momentarily distracted by the ice cream vendor brandishing two big cones topped with rocky road scoops. Yuri gave her one, which she happily licked. It was good! “Why would you scare me, unkie?”
“Because I’d tell it to you like it is, no sugar-coating.” Yuri glanced down at his watch. Yor and Loid would be home by now, and it was going to get dark soon. He began to lead Anya out of the park, one of her small hands in his. He wondered if she had gloves on when they left the house because all he could feel against his palm was a sticky, bare hand.
“Then tell me without the sugar.”
Yuri supposed it wouldn’t hurt. What was the worst that could happen? Death was inevitable, and it wasn’t something that scared him. He’d been too young when their father died, but he was around 7 when Yor let him say one last, tearful goodbye to their mother. An infection had ravaged her and Yuri remembered neither he nor Yor crying too much, each of them trying to be strong for the other as their mother slowly passed on in the hospital bed. He’d swallowed down his sobs until his throat hurt because he remembered that if he cried anymore, he might make his sister worry. It would be fine, probably. He’d seen death at Anya’s age, and he was fine.
“Okay, well, everyone dies. There’s something called the cycle of life, and we’re all a part of it: plants, animals, and yes, real people as well. When we die, we make way for new life to come into this world. New plants, new animals, new people. So, to answer your question, yes. Real people die, too.”
Anya was quiet for a little beat. “Even mama and papa?”
Yuri shrugged. “Yeah, sure. Everyone, kid. Even me, even you.”
Anya nodded in understanding. “Okay. Can we go home now?”
“Yeah, they should already be home, so we better get going.”
It took them just under five minutes to get back to the apartment building from the park. Strangely, Anya was silent throughout the whole walk, but Yuri didn’t really think much about it. She was probably tired after chasing that family of ducks around.
They made their way up the long flights of stairs and to the end of the hall where there was already the evening news playing on the other side of the door. Yuri let Anya in and was just about to call out to his sister that he was gonna be going when Anya’s ear-piercing shriek startled him out of his socks.
Alarmed, Loid and Yor jumped out off the sofa, thinking their daughter was hurt. Yuri’s heart began pounding in his chest. What was going on? Anya had her forearm to her eyes as she bawled loudly.
“What happened?” Loid asked Yuri, who looked dumbfounded. Yor was on her knees in front of the girl, inspecting her for any wounds. The soggy cone in her hand was upended so that the melting scoop of ice cream fell to the floor. Did she not like the flavor? Was that why she was crying?
“I-I don’t know! She was fine a minute ago!” Yuri cried.
“Anya, what’s wrong? Are you hurt?” Yor asked, her hands still checking for anything that could hurt.
“M-m-m-mama!” Anya pushed forward so she could throw her sticky-with-ice-cream hands all around Yor. She pressed her little face up into her mother’s neck as she sobbed. “Unkie s-said you and papa were gonna die!”
There were three adults with their jaws on the ground, just staring at each other in shock. Loid was the first to recover, aiming a steely look at his brother-in-law. “Explain.”
Loi-Loi had always been pleasant toward Yuri. Yuri could admit that most of the time he acted outlandishly to test the limit of his sister’s husband’s patience. Maybe he’d finally snap at him one time, and show his ugly side to Yor, and she would leave him. That day had yet to come, but by the look in Loid’s eyes, maybe today would be a contender.
Yuri held his hands up. “I didn’t– I mean, technically, I said everyone dies, which is true! She asked! I couldn’t lie to her!”
Yor gave him a vicious look, one he’d seen a handful of times in their youth. He’d always been a saint, and he’d tried to avoid giving his sister headaches when it was just them, but he had these moments in his youth that would drive Yor to the edge. She’d give him this look, and the antics would cease. Presently, Yuri clamped his lips shut. He’d fucked up, and he didn’t need to make excuses. He just had to wait for the consequences.
In contrast to the threatening aura she sent her brother, Yor went back into mommy mode and began soothing a hand down Anya’s back. The kid shook from the intensity of her tears and seeing that made Yuri really worried about the distress he caused her. He didn’t mean to scare her, but he supposed that just because it didn’t personally bother him, it wouldn’t bother someone else.
“Don’t worry, Anya! I’ll never die! Actually, I’ll live forever and then you’ll get sick of me!” Yor reassured her daughter with a squeaky pitch that Yuri knew meant she was lying.
Loid seemed to put his disappointment aside for a while. “Come on, Anya. Let’s get you washed off. You’re sticky. Calm down, okay? We can talk about why you’re scared.” The therapist pitch, in contrast to Yor’s lying pitch, was in immediate effect. Anya gave her mother’s neck one last squeeze before following her father to the bathroom.
Yor pushed up off the ground, heading for the kitchen to wipe the ice cream goo off her neck and hair. Yuri followed mutely, unsure if it was okay for him to speak again.
“Honestly, Yuri, she’s a little girl! Why would you say that!” Yor huffed. She was rarely upset with him, and this freaked him out, but Yuri realized that he shouldn’t make this situation all about him like he tended to.
“I didn’t know she would take it that way. I thought it wasn’t a big deal, sis! I mean, people die all the time!”
Yor turned the tap on and ran a wad of paper towels under it. “These are really sensitive topics that a child should only hear from her parents or a trusted educator, Yuri. It’s really common courtesy not to discuss these with a child because it could go against what the parents want to teach them.”
Yuri watched Yor wipe the wet paper towels against the hair matting to her sticky neck. “Jeez, forgive me for making a mistake. You should have a handbook of acceptable topics unwilling babysitters can talk to your kid about.”
The angry look was back. “You don’t get to act upset here, Yuri. Because of you, Loid and I will have to deal with Anya’s feelings, and probably nightmares about us dying. If you didn’t want to babysit because you don’t have responsible judgment, then just tell us. We’ll get someone else who won’t traumatize our child next time.”
Yuri was breathless when Yor finished talking. He and Yor so rarely fought, and it was so gut-wrenching when he did things that could upset her like this. He felt ill.
“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make you angry, sis. I didn’t mean to scare her. I just thought back if death scared me when I was her age, and it didn’t. I know I shouldn’t compare myself to her, but I wasn’t really thinking. Sorry.”
Yor swallowed the lump that lodged itself in her throat fast and hard. Both of them had been forced to grow up and see things no children had any business seeing at an early age, but Yor sometimes forgot that Yuri had to see horrors she did at half her age when their mother died. It wasn’t something they ever discussed in depth. There was always something so much more pressing than talking about what haunted their dreams; food had to be sourced, illnesses had to be survived, and money had to be made. Yor didn’t think Yuri traumatizing her daughter was excusable, but this opened up an opportunity to tak about what got them here.
Yuri sighed. “I had to see mom die at her age. I saw mom take that last breath and saw the nurses take her body away. I don’t know if it scared me, but it made me sad. I should have thought of Anya thinking about even just the possibility of losing you and Loi-Loi. Especially since she already lost her birth mother. I apologize for that. I’ll talk to Loi-Loi, too, but more importantly, I need to apologize to Anya, if you guys let me.”
Eyes glossy with tears and her bottom lip trembling, Yor reached out to take Yuri’s hand and give it a squeeze. “Okay.”
Once Anya was bathed and Yuri had said his apologies to Loid, the couple tucked their daughter into bed. Yuri could hear the hushed reassurances but tried not to listen too hard until he heard Yor call out for him.
Yuri gave a polite knock on Anya’s door before letting himself inside. Yor and Loid were kneeling on the floor beside her bed, and Anya was surrounded by stuffed toys. Her dog snored at her feet. “Hey, kid.”
“Uncle Yuri wants to tell you something, is that okay?” Loid asked the girl. Anya nodded.
Loid and Yor rose from their position, Loid helping his wife up by the hand even though she probably didn’t need the assistance. They stayed by the doorway, probably to watch for any other blunders.
Yuri sat on the edge of the bed. “Sorry for freaking you out earlier. I hope you know that your parents are strong and healthy, and it a very, very long time until you have to worry about any of that stuff. So I think you just have to be happy and carefree enjoying the long life you still have with them.”
Anya nodded again. “Will you die, too, unkie?”
A small panic began bubbling in Yuri’s gut. He turned to the parents by the door and saw them gesture encouragingly at him.
“Well, yeah. As I said, we all gotta go sometimes.”
Anya was thoughtful for a minute. She tapped her small hand to her chin as if in thought. “I’ll be sad when you die, unkie.”
Yuri sighed. He ruffled the top of Anya’s head, messing up her sleeping cap. “Ha! I would be, too. Get some rest now. I have to go.”
Anya snuggled down into her duvet and hugged her little chimera close. “G’night, unkie.”
The three adults bid her good night and left her room.
As soon as they were out in the hallways, Yuri blew the air out of his cheeks. “Good God. I hope that only gets easier with time. Good luck with the parenting thing, you two. This is definitely not for me.”
Loid chuckled. “Everyone says that.”
“Then you eat your words, and just pray you make it through the day,” Yor chimed in. “Are you leaving already? Don’t you want to have a drink or something?”
Yuri was already grabbing his coat, feeling his social battery draining fast. “Nah. I have some work to catch up on. See ya.”
Goodbyes with Yuri were always so simple. He was out the door in a heartbeat, leaving the house shrouded in peace again.
Loid exhaled in relief. “I say we survived that parenting obstacle well.”
Yor giggled. “I never used to be so quick to celebrate anything, but I feel like just getting through the day deserves a little reward. Do you want a slice of that apple pie in the fridge?”
“I’ll find some good wine to go with that.”
The two happily scrambled off to build their victory feast before settling down in front of the TV to watch the late-night cooking competition they liked. Small wins were so far in between, they took any opportunity to celebrate like this. They clinked their wine glasses together.
“To another day of keeping Anya alive and not traumatized.”
“Cheers to that!”