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“When am I ever gonna need to use a hydrospanner with you around?”
Ahsoka was lying on the edge of the transport ring of her Delta-7, watching Anakin fiddle around with the inside of one of the panels.
“I might not always be around, Snips,” he shot back, flicking grease off of his fingers and onto the plating of her nice, clean ship, “I have other things to do than babysit you, y’know.”
She sighed and rolled over so she was facing the top of the hangar, scooting down so her head was supported. “I guess.” She took a deep breath at the fear coiling around her sternum, releasing it to the Force. Solo missions were a lot of pressure, but she could handle it. She had learned how to handle it.
“It’s not like the Council would use you for anything else, though,” she laughed, and there was a clatter from down below, followed by a short silence.
She picked up a muttered, “sure,” and the continued sounds of unscrewing bolts and rewiring wires and whatever else she’d missed when she chose Ancient Rylothian Culture over Advanced Starship Mechanics.
She hadn’t known her time taking classes would be cut short by a Galactic war, pressing her onto the frontlines younger than any Apprentice should be facing more pressure than tests, negotiations assistance, or particularly hard sparring matches.
She wasn’t bitter, of course. She couldn’t stand to be bitter. Ahsoka had spent a tumultuous first week with Anakin feeling more upset and discomfort than ever in her life, but in war, you had to adapt or die.
Ahsoka adapted. She pressed her feelings into the Force, focused on the lives of her and her men. Focused on the cause, and the plan, and released her terror, annoyance, and resentment as unhelpful.
That’s not to say she was perfect at it. No Jedi was, no matter how calm Master Yoda always looked. She struggled plenty, but she was staying afloat years into a galactic war, which was pretty karking good for an previously-unprepared Padawan.
“How’d you feel about the debates on Corellia?” she probed, hoping to smooth over any earlier faux pas.
“Fine,” Anakin sighed, “we’ve certainly had worse negotiations.”
Ahsoka huffed out a small laugh. “That’s true. Which do you think was the worst overall?”
“Koru Neimoidia,” he said without hesitation. She winced.
“Yeah, probably.” The disaster at the grub production plants had been a long shot in the first place, especially with so much Neimoidian connection to the Trade Federation, but they’d lost a lot of good men there.
“I miss Tayse,” Ahsoka said without thinking, and winced again.
There was a rustling and a clank, as if someone was setting a ‘spanner down, and Anakin’s face appeared over the top of the transport ring.
He looked like he was trying to think of something to say about the clone medic that had been blown to bits right in front of them.
Ahsoka smiled wryly. “You can just tell me you miss them too.”
Anakin sighed, then jumped and pulled himself onto the ring beside her.
“I do,” he said, leaning so he could see her face, “and that’s okay. Perfectly natural.”
“We’re not supposed to get attached,” she reminded him, and he made a sour expression.
“The Code is pretty harsh on the attachment rules, isn’t it?”
“Yeah, the formal Code sounds like that,” she said, pushing herself up to a seated position and crossing her legs, “but I don’t think it’s harsh. What do you mean?”
He sighed. “I should have known you’d be with Obi-Wan on this.”
“No,” she interrupted, holding up a hand, “no, I’m not with anyone on this, what is that even supposed to mean?”
Anakin huffed, crossing his arms. “Just that every other Jedi seems to think the Code is perfect and untouchable, and completely fair.”
“Wait a minute,” she said, baffled, “are you saying you disagree with the code?” She hadn’t considered that, not really. The Code was kind of the guideline of all Jedi behavior, and… “What, did you have a terrible Tenets teacher or something?”
Anakin wrinkled his nose. “What’s Tenets?”
She gaped at him.
“Seriously, what’s Tenets.”
“Tenets is…” Ahsoka cast around for any possible example, “It’s like, the foundation of basic understanding and analysis of the Code. Y’know, history of its tenets? Ancient Code disputes? Past rules and additions?”
“Doesn’t sound familiar,” he said dismissively, “I had to catch up on a banthaload of classes, not surprised I missed a couple.
Absolutely shocked, Ahsoka pressed forwards. “No, you can’t just miss tenets, is that why- have you never had a Code debate or anything?”
“No?”
“Force itself,” she sighed, throwing up her hands in disbelief “maybe that’s your problem, then!”
“My problem is that the attachment rule is completely unfair.” He said, tightening his arms in their crossed position and looking out over the hangar.
Ahsoka scrambled to a better sitting position, kneeling in front of him and waving her hands emphatically. “It’s really, really not, though! Here, remember the Youngling Code?”
“The what?” he said, meeting her eyes again and looking genuinely puzzled.
Stars above.
“The Youngling Code, ” she enunciated, “the one literally every Jedi is raised on.”
“Sorry I’m not the perfect karking master,” he burst out, “maybe you should go argue with Obi-Wan about your stupid tenets.”
“No, no-” she soothed, “I’m genuinely-” Ahsoka took a deep breath. “Do you not know them?”
“No,” Anakin muttered, turning further away from her.
“Okay,” Ahsoka said carefully, “well, could I tell you about them?”
There was a short silence.
“Sure,” he said shortly.
“Well,” Ahsoka took a breath, “It goes something like this. Emotion, yet peace, ignorance, yet knowledge, passion, yet serenity, and so on.”
“So?”
“The official, and most commonly used Code says ‘there is no emotion, there is only peace, there is no ignorance, and all that, y’know? But we can’t start there, obviously. Even youngling jedi are still younglings. They feel strongly, they haven’t figured themselves or the world out yet, y’know?”
“So now you’re comparing me to a child,” Anakin snapped, “real mature, Snips.”
“No,” she pressed forwards, “I’m saying that if you weren’t raised on that foundation, it’s absolutely understandable that you might misinterpret the Code?”
“It sounded pretty karking clear,” he muttered. Ahsoka chose to ignore him.
“That means you’ve been seeing the Code as an absolute- which it is, more or less. But people don’t work in absolutes! The Code is the ideal we should strive to be, not a set of rules that would have us expelled from the Order for messing up!”
“It sure didn’t seem that way,” Anakin said, still standoffish, but tilted closer to her, like he was actually paying attention to what she was saying.
“That’s why the Youngling Code is so important in our development and understanding!” Ahsoka explained, “because it explicitly acknowledges that the Code is an ideal, and not a disqualification measure! Everyone feels things, Master, everyone gets scared sometimes. The point is that you should direct that energy differently. Emotion, yet peace. Death, yet the Force. That’s so much easier to explain and start living by.”
“Oh,” he nearly whispered. “So, the attachment rule?”
“Is important,” she clarified, “and necessary, but not set in karking stone. Everyone gets attached. It’s about not letting those attachments rule you. Because, depending on how you define attachment, the meaning of the Code could be interpreted completely differently! Tell me this,” she said, holding out a hand, “did you think the Code meant that any attachment of any kind was expressly forbidden?”
“ Yeah,” Anakin said, “that’s sort of the whole point, right?”
“No!” she exclaimed, “It’s about the level of attachment! The code means attachment like, like something that is strong enough to get in the way of your morals or beliefs. Like, ‘if you had to pick between that person and a hoverspeeder of innocents, who would you pick?’ It doesn’t mean you have to hold yourself completely aloof from caring about people?”
“Oh,” he breathed, “ oh.”
“ Yeah, you lazerbrain,” Ahsoka sighed, “I can see why you thought it was totally unfair now.”
“Huh,” Anakin said, looking off into the open space beyond the hanger’s protective field. “That changes… a lot.”
“No kriff.”
The stars spun by outside the hangar bay of the Resolute, and all across the galaxy, the Force began to click into place. A kinder future than that which everyone had been heading towards seemed more and more possible.