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It’s not until the third time Rain gets huffy after seeing Payu talking to a woman he doesn’t know that Payu starts to wonder if Rain’s anger is maybe about more than just regular old jealousy.
It starts with the misunderstanding about Natsu. Rain folds pretty easily and admits that he was completely wrong about that situation without much of a fight. But before Payu can ask why he would even come to the conclusion that Payu might be cheating on him, Rain is shoving a doctor’s coat in his hands and pushing him into the bathroom for another costume change, and as much as Payu will indulge him (and does think it’s pretty hot that Rain is so into him in any kind of uniform), he kind of just wants to get on with the program as well.
So the conversation is derailed.
The second time it happens is when they’re on their own little getaway a week later. The woman showing them the way to their private villa is laying on the charm thick, especially with Payu, and he’s not sure if she’s just trying to make sure they enjoy their stay or if she’s actually trying to flirt with him when it couldn’t be more obvious that he’s on a romantic vacation with his boyfriend. Either way, Rain gets huffy and clings tightly to Payu’s arm the entire time she’s with them. Maybe it’s because the thing with Natsu was so recent that Rain doesn’t get huffy with Payu this time, but rather with the world at large for people being daring enough to flirt with Payu right in front of him.
It's more cute than anything else, and Rain is easily cheered up with a few kisses and a reassurance that Payu inly wants Rain to flirt with him. In fact, it cheers Rain up so much that he drags Payu over to the couch to turn the kisses into something more before they can even check out their villa.
It makes sense that Rain would find it annoying to see people flirt with his boyfriend in front of him, so Payu doesn’t think any more of it at the time.
But then they start preparing for the new semester, and Payu occasionally helps out with the Student Club’s preparations for the freshmen initiation activities, and whenever he shows up, people notice. Payu doesn’t really notice them much, except that he can tell that there are more people than strictly necessary in his vicinity.
However, he does notice that Rain notices all the people around him.
It’s not unusual for Rain to be annoyed when people pay a lot of attention to Payu. He’s seen that before, like when he was helping Ple with the fit of the Korean costume for their play, and Rain freaked out and demanded that no one look at Payu. Mostly Payu finds it funny when Rain behaves like this. Funny and cute. So when he occasionally does it now, by draping himself over Payu or dragging him out of the room, all while shouting about how people shouldn’t look, Payu just kind of laughs it off, like he’s always done.
Until one day when Payu is talking to Ink, one of the current fifth years, and he sees the way Rain freezes when he walks into the room and spots them.
Maybe it’s because he’s never seen Rain’s initial reaction before. Or maybe it’s because he’s seen more of these situations recently. Or maybe Rain just reacts more visibly to this than he usually does. Whatever the case, Payu immediately becomes acutely aware that Rain looks genuinely upset to see Payu and Ink talking.
Ink puts her hand on Payu’s shoulder for a moment, and Payu sees the way Rain’s face shatters.
“P’Payu? You still with me?” Ink asks, shaking him a little.
“Yes, sorry,” Payu says. “I have to –”
“P’Payu!” Rain calls out, cutting Payu off before he can tell Ink he needs to go. His face doesn’t look shattered anymore. Instead, he looks flustered and pouty and a little bit angry, the way he always does when people are fawning over Payu.
But now Payu can’t help but wonder if that shattered look always comes first, and he’s just never seen it before.
Rain yanks Payu away from Ink and defiantly plasters himself against Payu’s side, still gripping his arm tightly, but his voice is annoyed when he asks Payu, “What are you doing?”
“I was just talking to Ink about her thesis project,” Payu says.
Rain glares between them. Ink looks very startled by the whole thing.
“And that requires her to put her hand on you?” Rain asks.
“Oh, that was nothing,” Ink says, waving her hand dismissively. “I was just thanking P’Payu for cheering me up. I’ve been so tired lately, I barely have time to see my girlfriend.”
Payu doesn’t know if Ink mentions her girlfriend just because that’s the truth or because it’s an easy and subtle way for her to let Rain know that she’s not interested in Payu, but he strongly suspects it’s the latter.
Rain visibly calms down and his grip on Payu’s arm loosens up.
After Ink has left, Rain lets go of Payu’s arm, crosses his arms over his chest, and turns away with a pout.
“P’Payu, why do you always let people fawn over you like that?” he demands.
Payu would hardly call a hand on his shoulder “fawning over him”, but he doesn’t dismiss it immediately this time, the way he normally would. That look on Rain’s face earlier is still vividly clear in his mind. There’s something here he has to get to the bottom of.
“She’s just a junior, who was asking for my advice,” Payu says gently.
“She didn’t have to touch you for that,” Rain huffs.
“Jealous?”
“No,” Rain huffs. The lie is so obvious, he may as well just have been honest.
Normally, Payu would brush off this kind of thing. Jealousy happens. Payu gets jealous sometimes too, so he can’t exactly blame Rain for getting jealous. But whereas Payu got jealous of Ple because Rain used to have a crush on her and has gotten jealous over people outright flirting with Rain, Rain seems to get jealous over even the little things. Sitting with Natsu on the couch, a saleswoman being charming, and now Ink’s hand on his shoulder. These aren’t things that would usually trigger a jealous reaction, but they do with Rain. And Rain always overreacts in some way.
Payu wraps his arms around Rain’s waist and says, “You don’t have to be jealous,” low in Rain’s ear, and hopes that it works. But even if he can placate Rain right now, there’s clearly something here that Payu needs to look into.
**
Because he’s now acutely aware that there may be more to Rain’s overreactions than jealousy, Payu pays extra attention the next time people swarm around him at the faculty and start asking for photos.
Rain gets flustered, which Payu had already noticed, but what he hadn’t noticed before is just how upset Rain looks.
Has Rain always reacted like this?
And, far more importantly, why does Rain react like this?
“Hey, hands off!” Rain shouts, storming forward, when a girl puts her hand on Payu’s arm. The girl startles enough to jump away, but that doesn’t make the kind of wild, panicked look on Rain’s face go away, nor does it stop him from placing himself squarely in front of Payu. “Everybody go! Don’t look at him! Put your phones away! Leave!”
It’s as ridiculous a request as it’s always been, but now, it makes Payu frown. Especially when people brush Rain off, and it only seems to make him more panicky and flustered, and the upset starts crawling back onto his face. Payu needs to get to the bottom of this, and he needs to do it quickly, because whatever this is, it goes a lot deeper than just Rain being silly. They don’t call Payu the god of the faculty for nothing. He’s smart enough to see the pattern forming in front of him, and he needs to connect the dots so he knows what to do about the problem they spell out.
So rather than just pull Rain into a hallway, Payu decides that he needs to take Rain home. They need to get to the bottom of this, and that’s not gonna happen in a public setting. So he excuses them, gathers Rain’s things, and pulls Rain out to his car.
“Phi, what are you doing?” Rain asks, clearly confused, as they head to the parking lot.
Payu stops and turns to look at him. “We need to talk about what happened in there.”
“What do you mean?” Rain asks.
“I mean, we need to talk about why you don’t want people to look at me,” Payu says.
Immediately, Rain tenses up. “No, we don’t.”
With a sigh, Payu cups one side of Rain’s face.
“Yes, we do,” he says softly. Rain opens his mouth to protest, but Payu puts a finger over his lips before he can say anything. “Rain, listen to me. I’m not mad. I just want to understand.”
Rain is still tense, but he deflates enough to get into the car without more protests. Payu puts Rain’s stuff in the boot and gets into the driver’s seat. Rain glances at him as he buckles in, but other than that, he doesn’t seem to look at Payu even once the whole drive. He doesn’t say anything either, and neither does Payu. There will be plenty to talk about when they get home.
Neither of them says a word until they’re in Payu’s living room. And it still isn’t Rain who breaks the silence.
“Sit down,” Payu says gently. Rain does as asked and sits down on the couch. Payu sits down next to him and takes Rain’s hand. He has a feeling a little bit of comfort will do Rain good. “Rain. Remember what happened with Natsu?” Rain nods slowly. “And every time I visit the university, you get mad at people for being around me. I want to know why you react like that to… to people paying attention to me.”
Panic settles over Rain’s face and his body goes tense.
“Don’t pretend you don’t get jealous too!” Rain says, clearly deflecting. He sounds almost frantic. “You showed up when I was having lunch with my friends just because you heard Ple was there!”
Payu nods a little. “That’s true, I did. But I know you used to have a crush on Ple. That’s why I was jealous. You protest against anyone even looking at me. You wouldn’t even let Sky take a photo with me in that Korean costume.”
He keeps his voice soft and does his best not to sound accusatory. He’s not accusing Rain of anything. He’s worried, and he hopes Rain knows that that’s why he’s doing this, why they’re having this conversation.
Rain looks away and bites his lip. He’s so tense, it’s like he’s scared. Hopefully, he’s just scared of talking about this, and not of what Payu will do in response to whatever he’s thinking. But to soothe him a little, Payu gently brushes Rain’s hair out of his face and strokes down his cheek. It seems to make some of the panic and fear leave his face, so Payu takes it was a success.
“Rain, look at me,” he says. After a moment’s hesitation, Rain’s eyes meet his. “I told you, I’m not mad. But something seems to be going on in that head of yours that makes you upset when I talk to women, or when I visit the faculty, and I want to understand why.”
For a moment, it’s like Rain doesn’t even breathe. He just looks at Payu with wide eyes and his shoulders by his ears.
And then he deflates. He slumps down and looks at his lap. He suddenly seems even smaller than he usually does, and not just physically either. He looks like he feels small.
“You’re so handsome,” Rain says quietly. It’s not a compliment like it usually is, or even like it was the first time they met. It’s just a statement of fact. “You’re so cool. And you’re so smart. Everyone looks up to you. You’re the god of the Architecture faculty. Everyone loves you. Everyone wants you. But… I’m not good enough.”
“What do you mean?” Payu asks with a frown. He’s got a bad feeling about where this is headed.
But then again, when he brought this up, he knew this direction was a possibility. That doesn’t make it easier to hear, though.
“I’m not handsome or cool or smart like you are. I’m ugly and annoying and stupid,” Rain says.
Instinctively, Payu wants to protest. Instinctively, he wants force Rain to take that back. Instinctively, he wants to hunt down whoever told Rain that enough to make him believe it and make them suffer for it. He wants to gather Rain in his arms, convince him that he’s wrong, and protect him from people who say those kinds of things.
In all the shouting today, Payu did hear Sig call Rain ugly and Por saying something about Rain being annoying. He hadn’t thought much of it at the time. Prapai and Saifha have both called Payu ugly and annoying before. Friends can be like that sometimes.
But clearly, with Rain, it’s not just playful banter or teasing.
“Who told you that?” Payu asks instead, with forced calm.
“Everyone,” Rain replies with a shrug. “My classmates, the seniors. Sig says everyone likes to tease me because I’m so stupid.”
Sig is a dead man. The next time Payu sees him, he’s going to make sure Sig never says anything like that to Rain again. What kind of friend does something like that?
“You call me stupid as well, phi,” Rain says, but not like an accusation. Horrifyingly, he says it likes its proof that he’s right.
“When I say that to you, it means cute,” Payu says. Rain doesn’t look entirely convinced, but Payu might be reeling a little too much to be all that convincing right now. He’s always (except that one time after Rain snuck into the race) meant it as an endearment. He does genuinely think it’s cute when Rain has a moment of being a little slow or naïve or airheaded. That’s all he means by it. He certainly doesn’t actually think Rain is stupid, and he wants to kick himself for apparently making Rain think he’s stupid. Even if Payu isn’t the biggest culprit in this, it still won’t have helped.
“You don’t think I can become an honor student,” Rain points out.
“I was an honor student. I know how hard it is, that’s all. That doesn’t mean I think you’re stupid,” Payu says. “I’m not sure Sky can become an honor student either.”
It’s hard to tell what Rain thinks of that. He looks somewhat placated, in a way, but he also doesn’t really look like he believes Payu. But Payu decides to shelve the discussion on Rain’s intelligence for now (he’s definitely coming back to it at some point, though), because he’s starting to put together pieces of the puzzle. He just needs the last few pieces to confirm his conclusion.
And so he asks the question he’s been wanting an answer to all along.
“Rain, darling, please be honest with me. Why do you get so upset when other people look at me?”
Rain’s back straightens, his shoulders rise up to his ears, and his hands clench into fists in his lap. He’s no longer looking at Payu either. All the telltale signs that he’s nervous. For a moment, Payu thinks that Rain is gonna try to come up with a lie, but then his eyes flicker to Payu’s for a moment and he lets out a deep sigh.
“I guess I just think… if all these people are looking at you… and they’re beautiful and smart and mature… and I’m ugly and stupid and annoying and childish… why wouldn’t you look back?” Rain says quietly.
Payu swears he can hear the sound of his own heart breaking.
Is that really how Rain sees himself? The thought of it makes Payu want to scream and hunt down anyone who has ever called Rain any of those things. His sweet, beautiful, talented Rain thinks he’s the opposite of what Payu sees. It’s no wonder he reacts so strongly to people fawning over Payu, or that he jumped to conclusions over Natsu, if this is how he thinks of himself.
Payu will not let him continue to think like that, not if he can help it.
“Rain, you are none of those things,” Payu says firmly, cupping Rain’s head in his hands. “You’re not ugly, you’re beautiful. You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. You’re not stupid. You’re so talented, and you are smart, even if it sometimes takes you a little longer to connect the dots. That doesn’t mean you’re stupid. And you’re not annoying or childish. You’re funny and silly, and I love that about you. I love everything about you.”
Rain bites his lip. “But how long will you love me if someone better comes along?” he asks.
Payu didn’t think his heart could break more than it already has, but he’s pretty sure Rain just proved him wrong.
He has to wonder where all this is coming from. When they started dating, Rain didn’t seem to have all these insecurities. Has Payu just never noticed, or are they actually recent? And if that’s the case, how the fuck has Payu fucked up so badly that his boyfriend is gaining insecurities throughout the course of their relationship?
“No one will be better than you,” he says. “I told you, you’re not stupid or ugly, or any of the things people say to you. You’re smart and beautiful and funny. I promised I’d never let you down, and I mean it. I love you.” Rain still looks unsure, so Payu decides to switch gears. “Where did you even get the idea that someone could be better than you?”
Rain shrugs a little.
“The way people talk about me. They all say the same things, like it’s a fact that I’m stupid,” he says, and despite how resigned to these “facts” he’s seemed so far, it’s clear that he’s also hurt by it. “And… lots of people talk about how much better you could do than me. I overheard some seniors talking about us once. They were talking about how we could have ended up together. One of them said that I must be really good in bed to make you stay with me.”
If Payu knew exactly which of Rain’s seniors said that, they would also be dead.
“Don’t listen to them, Rain,” Payu says. “They’re assholes, and they’re probably just jealous.”
Plenty of Payu’s juniors pined after him when he was still in university, and he’s sure some of them continued to pine even after he graduated. Jealousy being their motivation for saying something so rude, and so wrong, makes a lot of sense.
He can picture Som saying something like that. Rain has talked about Som giving him the cold shoulder and glaring at him since they’d revealed their relationship.
“I know,” Rain says. Payu can’t help the way his eyebrows go up in surprise. From everything else Rain has said, Payu did not expect that. “I know the people who talk about us like that are probably just jealous. And…”
Rain trails off and licks his lips. He’s looking at something over Payu’s shoulder, probably not really looking at anything, really, but just avoiding Payu’s eyes. He looks deep in thought, like he’s trying to figure out the best way to formulate his next sentence.
“What is it, darling?” Payu asks softly. He tries to catch Rain’s eyes, but Rain keeps looking away.
“I’m not – I’m not worried about being good enough. In general, I mean,” Rain begins. Payu nods a little, relieved. Even if there are still issues here, with Rain’s self-image, it’s good to know that, at the very least, he doesn’t actually see himself as stupid or ugly or annoying. “I work hard, and I get good grades, so I know I’m not totally stupid or useless. And people used to compare me to Korean actors, so I know I’m not actually ugly either. And I know I can make people laugh, and Sky says he likes how persistent I am. But…”
“But?” Payu prompts.
“But when it comes to you… and us… I just get worried that people are right. That I’m not smart enough for you. Or good-looking enough, or that I’m too annoying, and that one day, someone will come along who fits you better, and if that person looks at you… you’ll look back. And that’ll be it.” Rain finally looks Payu in the eyes. “I’m worried about not being good enough for you.”
“You don’t have to worry about that,” Payu says immediately and starts stroking the back of Rain’s neck, hopefully soothingly. “You are more than good enough for me.”
“But people say –”
“It doesn’t matter what people say,” Payu interrupts. “They know nothing about us, or about me, if they think you’re not good enough for me. You are.”
Rain is back to looking doubtful, but he doesn’t say anything. Payu takes the opportunity to, once and for all, get to the bottom of his original worry. “So you want to stop people from looking at me to stop me from looking back? In case anyone else ever catches my attention?”
It takes a moment, but then Rain nods a little. He’s pouting, and he’s not looking at Payu anymore, but he nods.
Payu kisses him. He’s already said all he can to assure Rain, and he’ll say it as many times as it takes, but right now, the best course of action might be to reassure Rain through action, even if that action is just a kiss. Rain kisses him back, tender and slow, and he allows Payu to pull him closer, until Rain is plastered against Payu’s side and Payu’s arms are tight around Rain’s waist.
When they pull apart, Payu gently grabs Rain’s chin to make sure Rain looks at him.
“Rain, darling,” he says quietly. “Remember that time before your second year, when I came to pick you up from lunch with your friends, and we told them all about our relationship?” Rain nods. He looks adorably confused. “Do you remember in the car afterwards, you told me you never look at anyone the way you look at me?” Rain nods again. “The same goes for me. I never look at anyone the way I look at you. I never have before, either.” That puts a smile on Rain’s face, finally. It’s small, barely there, but it’s there. Rain is happy to hear that. Maybe even pleased. “I love you, more than I’ve ever loved anyone else. So trust me when I say that it doesn’t matter if people look at me, because I will never look back the way they want me to.”
The smile falls from Rain’s face again, but he doesn’t look as unsure of himself as he did earlier. Payu counts that as progress.
“Okay,” Rain says. “I love you too.”
Payu lets out a breath and tension he hadn’t even realized he had releases from his shoulders. It hasn’t exactly been the best or easiest conversation, but it’s definitely been necessary. And now Payu can focus on how to move forward, with all the stuff he’s learned, and make sure that Rain never doubts his place next to Payu, even for a second.
**
When Payu takes Rain to bed that night, he takes his time. He strips Rain down slowly and carefully. He kisses every inch of Rain’s body and tells him how beautiful he thinks every part of him is. Payu isn’t normally one to talk a lot in bed, but he does tonight. It’s almost like the roles are reversed. Rain is unusually quiet and Payu is unusually chatty.
He tells Rain how smart he is too, how proud Payu is of him, and does everything he can to make Rain feel as treasured and loved as possible.
Rain blushes and stutters and whines, but Payu doesn’t let that deter him. And Rain never asks him to stop.
Payu knows that one conversation, long as it had been, won’t fix everything. He knows doing this won’t fix everything either. As handy as it would be, he doesn’t have a magical dick and the ability to fuck Rain’s insecurities out of him. But if he keeps doing this, if he keeps showering Rain in praise, keeps reminding Rain how good he is and how much he deserves to be by Payu’s side, then hopefully it’ll start to drown out all the people saying things to the contrary.
Though hopefully he can come up with a way of stopping people from calling Rain stupid, ugly, and annoying. If he can’t, he'll do everything in his power to drown them out.
“Do you still think I would ever look at someone else?” Payu asks afterwards, when they’re pressed together chest to chest and their noses constantly brush each other. Payu has one arm firmly around Rain’s waist to keep him close, and Rain has one slung over Payu’s waist as well.
“Hmmm,” Rain hums. Payu squeezes his waist. “No. I trust you, P’Payu.”
“Good,” Payu says and rolls onto his back. He pulls Rain with him, so Rain ends up resting on his chest. “Because I promise I will never let you down.”
“I’m gonna hold you to that,” Rain mumbles sleepily.
“That’s fine,” Payu reassures him.
He’s happy to know what the problem Rain has with other people looking at Payu is, but mostly he’s relieved that, now he knows, he can work on fixing it. It may take time, but so far, it doesn’t seem like a lost cause. Rain still trusts him, still believes in him, and that’s a good starting point.
**
The next time Payu is at the university and people start crowding around him, Payu makes the first move. He smoothly steps away from the crowd towards Rain, who looks flustered and upset like he usually does in these situations, but it feels a whole lot different now that Payu knows why he reacts like that. It no longer seems as funny or as cute.
But now that he knows, he can also do something about it, which is exactly what he does.
He walks over to Rain to stand behind him and wraps his arms tightly around Rain’s waist. This way, Rain is partially shielding Payu from everyone looking, and Payu is showing everyone who he belongs to. Rain’s hands come up to rest on Payu’s hands, and he gives Payu a stunned look over his shoulder. Payu just smiles at him. It’s not like Payu is the one who has ever been averse to public displays of affection.
“P’Payu, what are you doing?” Rain asks, but he’s not making any move to push Payu away.
“Holding you,” Payu says simply. Rain blushes a little and looks back at the crowd that had gathered.
People seem to have reacted to the move almost immediately. Several of them stop in their tracks and even more stare, wide-eyed.
Payu isn’t sure why they seem so surprised. A lot of them probably follow him on Instagram, and he hasn’t exactly been hiding his relationship with Rain there. He’s not as bad as Prapai, but Rain is regularly featured in his posts.
Still, the people who had been moving in to crowd around Payu like he’s a superstar and they’re his fans are now shuffling on their feet, clearly unsure of what to do or how to react to this new situation. Payu hides a satisfied smirk in Rain’s hair. His tactic seems to be working. The people who want a photo with him are probably a bit stumped at now having to ask Rain to move, since they most likely don’t want Rain in the photo too. The ones who want to stand too close to him, maybe in some weird, vain attempt to get Payu’s attention (the very thing Rain is afraid to see happen, Payu now realizes), are probably disappointed that Payu has moved himself not just out of arm’s reach, but behind a solid defense. Asking him to step away from Rain just to they can get all up in his space would not look good.
There are some people who just look surprised, and maybe slightly confused. Those are probably the ones that will continue to interact with Payu, even if he keeps holding Rain every time (and that is most certainly the plan now). It’s probably the ones who want his help on their schoolwork.
From his place next to Rain, Sky is looking at Payu with surprise and amusement. Por is looking between Payu, Rain and the awkward crowd, like he’s just as unsure of what to do.
Sig isn’t here today, which is only a good thing. Payu still kind of wants to kill him.
Ple isn’t here either, which is also a good thing. Even if she insists that she no longer has a crush on Payu, it’s clear Rain doesn’t entirely believe her.
“Uh, P’Payu,” a guy in the crowd says carefully, then says nothing more.
“Can I help you all with something?” Payu asks, polite and nice as ever. “I’m here to help my boyfriend and his friends with some of their work, and then I’m taking him out for dinner, so I don’t have a lot of time.”
It’s not a lie. Entirely.
Payu is indeed here to help Rain and his friends with some of their work. It’s not something he does often, but every now and again, when he has the time, he’ll stop by the workshop and give his input on their projects and assignments, and today is one of those days. He does also have plans to take Rain out for dinner afterwards, but there’s no time schedule. Technically, these people could take up more of his time than he’s making it sound like.
Except he doesn’t want them to.
Payu has never minded the admiration before. He’d quickly concluded that getting annoyed or bothered by it was a waste of time and could mean he’d have to be rude to people whose only fault is having a crush on him. But it bothers Rain a lot, and that bothers Payu a lot.
“Right, and I have to leave soon too, and I don’t want to miss out on P’Payu’s help,” Sky interjects. Payu looks over at him in surprise just in time to see Sky shoot him and Rain an understanding, supportive smile.
He’s helping them get rid of the crowd.
It’s a big departure from how Sky has previously egged on the crowds to annoy Rain, and Payu loves him for it.
The crowd gets even more awkward. Some people ask if Payu has time to take a picture with them (“Sorry, my hands are full right now,” Payu replies, and sways Rain a little). Some ask if he’ll be coming back soon (“Sorry, I’m quite busy with work.”). Some are bold enough to ask if they could join Payu for dinner, or if they can convince him to join them instead (“No, he’s having dinner with me,” Rain says hotly, and Payu presses a kiss to his hair in reassurance).
It's not often people are so bold, and the fact that they’re so bold when he’s so very clearly taken is a bit of a shock, but Payu has seen people fawning over Prapai while Sky is right next to him, so maybe he shouldn’t be shocked. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s holding Rain now, letting Rain shield him from prying eyes and hands and desires, that makes people bold. Like this is their last chance or something.
The group of people that give Payu the best surprise is the small group of girls who take pictures of him and Rain and whisper something about how cute they are and how their friends will flip over the pictures.
It’s nice to know that not everyone disrespects his relationship.
A group of people step forward to ask if Payu can take a look at their projects before he leaves, and Payu agrees. He’s a good senior and he’ll help out when his juniors want advice on their work. It’s what he’s here for, anyway, even if it was originally an exclusive group of juniors.
But when he sits down at the table so they can put their floorplans in front of him, Payu pulls Rain down to sit in his lap.
“P’Payu!” Rain yelps. The group looks at them awkwardly, like they’re not sure what to do.
“This way, you can learn something too,” Payu says. And then to curb off any comments from the people around them about Rain’s intelligence, he squeezes Rain’s waist and adds, “Not that you really need to. Your work is already good. But learning more is never a bad thing.”
“P’Payu,” Rain says again, but he doesn’t seem to know what else to say, so Payu turns back to the group, who are still waiting awkwardly a short distance away.
“Alright, show me what you have,” he says.
The group pull out their designs and put them in front of Payu for him to shuffle through.
Despite Payu’s comment that Rain could learn something from this as well, Rain doesn’t pay attention to what Payu says to the group. Instead, he gets pulled into a discussion with Por and Sky about their own designs. At one point, when there’s a lull as the group makes the changes Payu suggested, Payu hears Por say, “Damn, Rain, that’s a really good idea. How did you come up with that?”
And Payu takes that opportunity to both praise Rain and show who he himself belongs to.
“My wife is intelligent, and a good student. He has a lot of good ideas,” he says proudly, and watches in amusement as Rain struggles to contain both how flustered and how proud that makes him.
“I’m good at what I do,” he says, lifting his chin a little. It seems the pride won over in the end. Good for him.
“The professors do always seem to love your designs,” Por comments.
“Mm, it’s not when it comes to designs that Rain is likely to struggle,” Sky adds. “It’s when it comes to the written stuff.”
“Ai’Sky,” Rain whines and gives Sky a light shrug. He doesn’t seem offended, though, so Payu huffs out a laugh. Por laughs as well, and Sky seems pleased with his little dig. “Don’t be mean. I just get tired when I have to read a lot of text or listen to a lot of theory.”
Sky nods a little. “Sure. It can be hard to concentrate for a long time.”
Before Payu can hear what’s said next, one of the people who had asked for his help draws his attention back.
“P’Payu?” she asks. Payu turns back to her. She’s holding out her floor plan. “What do you think now?”
It takes maybe ten more minutes for the group to profusely thank Payu for his help and leave. It coincides with Sky saying that Prapai is on his way and beginning to pack up, which means Por packs up as well. Rain moves to get up to do the same, but Payu keeps a tight hold on him.
“P’Payu, what are you doing? Let go so I can get my stuff,” he says.
“You can’t stop them from looking,” Payu whispers, so none of the others will hear, “but the only one I care about looking at me is you. And you’re the only one I look back at.”
Rain’s eyes go a little wide. He looks almost overwhelmed, but in a good way. Payu just smiles softly and waits for Rain to process.
It doesn’t matter if it takes him a few extra seconds.
Rain twists a little and leans in to kiss Payu softly.
“Thank you, P’Payu,” he whispers back.
Payu squeezes him and gives him another kiss. Rain usually doesn’t like kissing in front of people, especially not his friends, but he seems to make an exception today.
Then Por calls out, “Oi, you guys! There are still people here!”
Rain pulls away, but doesn’t leave Payu’s lap, and shoot back with, “You’re just jealous!”
Por probably isn’t jealous. Payu has never gotten the impression that Por in any way has ever had a crush on him. Other people might be jealous, though, and there’s not much they can actually do about that, unfortunately.
But thankfully, it seems like Payu can make Rain stop worrying about other people being jealous. And that’s the most important thing.