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“I miss my mom.”
Rodney turned to look at John, totally shocked. They’d been sitting on the pier, drinking beers mostly in silence. And here John was still staring off into the distance like he hadn’t just blurted out something personal out of nowhere like he wasn’t totally emotionally constipated and had never offered up such insights before.
“Um, ok,” Rodney said after a moment when John didn’t continue. “What, uh, what was she like?”
There were a few more moments of silence while John took a sip of beer and seemed to be trying to gather himself. “She was great,” he finally said, voice quiet. “I don’t know how she put up with dad honestly, because she was always so nice. Always wanted to help people.”
Rodney watched as John shook his head slowly, then drained the rest of his beer in one gulp. It seemed actually talking about himself made John quite thirsty, or he just really needed the liquid courage. Rodney tried hard to keep quiet, not wanting to interrupt this unheard of event.
“She died of cancer when I was ten,” John continued. His voice was even lower, full of some emotion Rodney had never seen or heard in the other man before. “It basically destroyed my family. She was the only thing holding us together and with her gone… we weren’t much of a family after that.”
John turned suddenly to face Rodney, making him flinch back a little in surprise. His eyes looked moist in the dim light of the pier, and Rodney didn’t hold back the impulse to reach out, pulling his lover against his chest. John let out a choked sob, clutching at Rodney’s back.
“I miss her,” John whispered into Rodney’s neck, the words so faint they might have been missed if they weren’t holding each other so closely.
“I know,” Rodney replied, helpless to do anything but let John know he was there for him. “I know.”