Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Recently, every night when Childe comes back from work he notices cats hanging out in his backyard. At first he didn't like it, seemingly more confused and annoyed that if he supported cats lazying in his yard they'll likely pee and poo within the area and stink up the whole place.
But days go by and he gets used to it, even appreciating their presence after a long day of work. Playing with the cats after finishing a boat load of tasks. He even buys them a bowl or two just in case one of them gets hungry- hoping that they won't litter around the house, fortunately so far he hasn't found a single piece of shit.

Although, today was different.

Today, not a single cat has appeared... well except for one....

"Well hello, I haven't seen you here before..." He murmurs as he reaches out to pet the 'cat's' head. The so-called 'cat' he assumes, jolts up from the smell of a human.
It looked squishy. Instead of fur it had flesh, colored in a shade of deep brown. It had horns and a tail that glowed yellow. Eyes of amber squint at him, cautious of the incoming danger that may happen.

However despite its unique appearance, Childe stands courageous and tries to pet it anyway.

Seeing a hand reach out to him, the creature sniffs his fingertips and then when it seems like he trusts Childe, it gently licks his palm.
"Awwww'' He scoops the animal up and doesn't waste time showering it with affection. It makes a small purring like sound and snuggles in the embrace of the snezhnayan. "Are you the little troublemaker that keeps the other cats away?" The cat snorts at his question, rubbing his snout to Childes neck. "I'll take that as a yes." The boy giggles.

The creature was quite energetic in his grasps, sniffing his collar and seeing something stick out of his breast pocket. "Ha-hey wait!" The little gremlin snuck its paws inside, digging out a piece of candy wrapper. "Are you hungry little fella?" He asks and the cat nods.

He glances at the food bowls, they were full and looked like it hadn't been eaten ever since he filled them out to the brim. "Dont you want to eat those?" He points to the bowls. The creature shakes his head in dismay and wraps his tail around his arm. "Woah okay okay, Let's get you some snacks... that is if I find out what you can eat."

Well it looks like he has a new pet.

Chapter Text

Two days before the encounter of Childe and the strange cat-like creature, a certain stoic consultant and aspiring musician chats away inside a quiet cafe.
"There's been a talk of the town that a foreigner has been taming a lot of cats lately" Venti says, twirling his hair braids. "Although some may say the cats were actually willing to go to his backyard, no one knows why."

"I fail to see why this may be of interest to me." Zhongli places his tea cup down and rests his back unto the chair.
"Oh you lizard, didn't you say you want to escape for a while? To lay low for the time being and relax from being a mortal after all these centuries?"

"I, again, fail to see why a foreigner taming cats relates to my recent endeavours."

"Well, you don't want to be a god and you don't want to be a human. How about being a cat? Sneak into the yard and be merrily taken care of by someone-, huh, now what I think about it it sounds like those nurseries they keep old people in." He takes a sip from his milktea and continues. "Anyways, I believe now's the best time, and I heard the boy is quite a dashing man. I'd go and take a look for myself but my allergies will be the end of me as soon as I step into the house."

Zhongli pondered. 'Well... he does make sense.' After decades and centuries of being a god then a mortal. Zhongli now desires to laze around and live life with no worries without doing any strenuous activities, and what better solution than to be a cat?"

"I will take this into consideration."

"That's the spirit!" Venti lit up, "Or should I say I'm the spirit?"

"I do not desire to take a form of a feline though."

"You can't use your dragon form! You won't even be able to fit through the door..."

"Then I shall make a few modifications with my body." The liyuen stood up from the table. "I will take my leave then, I'll put the plan into action."

Venti grinned at him, raising a platic up filled with boba and ice. "Alright then, have fun!"

Zhongli was about to exit through the doors until he stops for a while and turns to the ex-bard. "Goodbye, old friend. If we cross paths again, may it be worthwhile-"

When the Liyuen turned around, Venti almost choked on his drink. With his straw pointed at Zhongli and his cheeks puffed, he had originally planned on spitting on him with boba through his straw after opening the door. "Oh ehehe... whoopsies~" His grin widens while hastily hiding cup.

"-but I do hope our paths don't cross so soon..."

"Uh... May the wind lead you!" And with that the door slams shut.

Chapter Text

"Let's see what the fuss is all about." The Liyuen snorted, wiggling his way under the fence and into the infamous backyard.

It was warm, welcoming, and quite cozy. There was also this scent… all sorts of mouth-watering cuisine filled the air. 'The place smells... divine' he crawls under the tree shade and sprawls on the grass, eyeing the various toys, goodies, and even a cat tree as far as his eyes can see.

Then he sees him.

Bathing in moonlight, eyes dim but genuine smile, a man so gifted with youthful features- yet eyes tired with eyebags emerged from the inside of the house and greets the cats.

It feels familiar but he cannot quite put his finge- I mean paws on it.

'This must be the owner' he gapped, heart fluttering at the sight.

He waits for a minute, observing the human. Trying to find any ill will or just a hint of suspicious activity that maybe he was training these cats to wreak havoc across the city. Eventually looking away until the ginger laughed at the cat who's bottom was showing as it was stuck inside a cake box. 'Wait...' that laugh, he remembers who it belongs to.

'Childe?' The ginger appears to have ignored his presence. Focused more on the cats that have been meowing at him the moment he stepped out from the backdoor. He sees him pick up a black cat and hugs it.

A small pang of jealousy hits his heart, perhaps he wants to be the only one that can be embraced by him.

Chapter Text

The moment Childe went inside the house to rest and sleep for the night, Zhongli made the first move to make sure this was his territory.

But how?

By turning into a biiiiiggg cat!

A very big, long, gargantuan cat.

Like, he turned into his original form but to a size he made sure it wouldn't cause any damage to Childe's property or the cat goodies.

Don't worry, the cats are fine. The moment Zhongli glared at them using his amber eyes filled with the anger of a thousand men [thousand cats], they scattered outside to escape from the fuming retired god who was eager to mark his territory.

Childe stirs in his sleep, almost waking up from the rumbling outside.

The next day the ginger awakes, he notices the lack of meowing.

Chapter Text

When Childe noticed the lack of meowing and the absence of cat activity in the backyard but the new brown cat, he knew something had happened. He closes the kitchen backdoor and grabs a phone to call a friend of his, explaining the situation eagerly to the blonde on the other side of the phone.

 “...Yeah that's just it! Listen, I used to have random cats hanging out in my backyard, like, I gave them food and toys to play with so I can relax at home! but now after adopting this one cat they don't appear anymore…”

“Maybe they just feel threatened by its presence. I've learned from my own experience that cats are quite territorial, and there are some who really don't play nicely with others. Your best course of action would be to give this cat all your attention right now, and work around its whims. Once you build up some trust, you can try letting in other cats to meet with it. With some patience and a gentle hand, I'm sure you'll be able to create a friendly household full of cats running, jumping, and playing around in no time.”

“Ohh, so the cat really wants my place all to himself now huh.”

“Yep! I'm afraid so. Many of these cats are actually quite clever, despite their appearances. They are fully aware of what they are doing, and can be quite stubborn when they know what they want. But their stubbornness is also what makes them so charming! I'd tell you to give that cat a pet on my behalf, but I wouldn't want him to think you had any other loyalties. In order to claim their territory, Cats indulge in instinctive marking behaviors like biting and scent rubbing. If the lil guy rubs his face and body, he leaves behind pheromones that create boundaries for him so he can feel protected and secure.”

“So I guess the other cats won't be appearing in my backyard any time soon.”

“It's hard to say. Cats aren't like us humans — they take their time adjusting to new environments and different people. Just give it time, be patient, and make sure your kitty friend gets good quality food. And don't forget to give them a daily dose of petting and scritches. Oh! And don't forget to get a scratch pole! You know, the kind that's just a pole with a carpet wrapped around it? I find most cats really appreciate being able to scratch up those when they have extra energy to get rid of.”

“I think I already have that! The cats that used to pay me a visit loved it to shreds- literally haha. But I'll take note of that, thanks Thoma!” He says goodbye and places the phone down, putting a hand under his chin as if he's in deep thought.

He did notice the “cat” made a number of chirping and growling sounds in addition to its meows. And when he goes to check on him in the backyard he hears occasional purring, hissing, howling and even screeching when he goes near the fence.

“Mrrooow!!” He hears the pet door open at the entrance.

Speaking Of the devil.

“There you are!!” He happily picks up the cat and is prepared to give him a lil kiss on his forehead before noticing something in his mouth. “What do you have here you little trouble maker…” he said, taking the cor lapis ring from the…

COR LAPIS RING?

"Huh?"

The pet smiles at him, licking his cheek. "Mroww, mrowww!" As if asking if he likes it.

"Where did you get this? Wait oh archons above, did you steal it!?" The ginger places the cat down and makes a b-line for his phone- again. "What if this is someone's wedding ring? What if this cost millions! Ugh Dilong!"

The car grunts at the name given to him, clawing Childes pants. He has tried arguing about thename but without talking... it was quite hard. "Mrrowww! Mrroooooowwww!'

The snezhnayan snaps a picture of the ring, posting it online with the caption 'My cat gave me this ring. If anyone recognizes this please message me and we'll discuss how to get it back to you.'

"Lets just hope for the best that when someone contacts me they're telling the truth. He sighs, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Where on Teyvat have you gotten this ring?" He sighs again while plopping down a wooden chair next to the dinning table, hands covering his face.

He hears a light shuffling and a- "Meeew…"

He opens his fingers and peeks an eye out at the cat. "Oh Dilong don't give me that meow.."

"Meewww" The male 'cat' with sleek brown fur and amber eyes stares back at Childe, who pretends to sulk as if he just yelled at him. His ears are down, and his fluffy tail is between his legs. It stands up straight and stares up at him with sad, wide eyes. He is clearly sad and dejected by the ginger's scolding, wondering if Childe will forgive him for his actions.

The cat meows sadly, then walks to him with its tail still down, asking to be forgiven with its adorable little mew. "Dilong…" The Snezhnayan picks him up, "promise me to never do that again okay?" 

"Mrow!~" He yipped.

That's probably an 'okay!', right?

Right?

Wrong.

After that incident the cat tries to bring him gifts such as mora, food, a dead bird or a nice, tiny, ALIVE mouse. He also tries to rub against his leg, purring as sweetly as he can, as if begging for a cuddle. He makes little, cute noises that try to lure him in, and tries to make sure he's always nearby, as if guarding him. He tries to always be close by, sitting in his lap or by his feet, purring happily or looking up at him with those big, cute, kitten eyes of his.

"You're getting quite clingy recently, whats going on with you?" The ginger picks the cat mid-walk into his room. "MmMMROOOw!" Zhongli hissed, attacking Childe with aggressive licks. 

"Ugh! OK OK! sorry!" He quickly places the feline down. The cat gave him one sniff, shook his head, and kicked the dust behind him towards the human before walking away. "Mrow." He spat.

"Clingy and moody…" The ginger mutters. "Dilong, remember we'll be having visitors later because they're here to pick up their friend's ring that YOU stole! So be on your best behavior!" He yelled at the cat who was at the end of the hall. It looked like it was searching for something.

"MROW!" It screeched back.

"Sometimes I don't know if he knows what I'm saying…" he mumbles, seeing Zhongli zoom past one room after another.

"I'm here to take my f-friends ring back." Says the man in front of him, choking on some of his words like the words he's saying commits blasphemy against a god. 

He seemed like a tall, slim, yet muscular young man with a handsome, stoic face. He has medium-length black hair with blue highlights and gold eyes which glared at him with an alert gaze. The young man's skin tone is a pale, ashen gray and he dresses in black combat garb with blue embellishments.

"I'm sorry for the issue Sir Xiao, I can't believe my cat would go and steal your friend's ring. It must be very important to him that even his friends recognize it." Childe hands the liyuen the cor lapis ring.

"This ring was a symbol of love and eternity. My mas- friend. planned on giving his accessory to the one he loved accompanied with other courting gifts… but he couldn't find him anymore." He reminisces of a time long ago, emotions swirling within his heart. But Xiao shrugged it off, focusing on the present which was an exact replica of someone from the past who continues to disrespect his god. This time stealing priceless rings that belonged to him.

"Oh so a wedding ring?" He questioned, the man squinted at him more. 

"Be it so as you call it. Labels don't matter if it's uttered through an irrelevant person's mouth." The liyuen scoffed, placing the ring into his pocket.

Hey ouch… but understandable anyway. He's caused enough problems for his friend. And besides, literally was irrelevant since the rings had nothing with him.

"Mew!" He hears Zhongli growl behind him, probably scratching holes to his pants- again.

"Not right now Dilong…" He picks up the cat, "You should apologize to mister Xiao… c'mon say sorry to the man." He holds up Zhongli and lets him dangle in front of the liyuen. 

"Hmp. You should control your- Mr.Zhongli!?" Xiao immediately covered his mouth with both of his hands, seeing his master eye to eye in the form of a cat

"Mrow." The cat said. Wriggling in the ginger's hold.

"Why..why… on.."

"Mrow,"

"O-oh…"

"Mrow.mrow."

"I see…"

"Huh? Can you understand him?" Childe questioned, facing the cat to him. "And what did you call him? Zhongli?"

"Mrrp!" The cat yiped, tail wagging at the name.

"Oh yo..u have a name?" The pet nodded, licking his cheek gently. "Huh…"

Then suddenly, the heavy smell of sandalwood all made sense to Xiao. Oh shit. "On second thought. You can keep the ring. It belongs to you now." He coughs, "I'm sorry for the intrusion."

"In..what wait- Mr. Xiao!" Before Childe could grab the young man, the liyuen bolted away from them on the pavement. He couldn't probably even hear him if he did call him out.

"Huh…" he huffs, looking at the ring then at 'Zhongli'.

"Mrow!" The cat that was wriggling in his hold kicked his hand to make the pet drop him over his neck. Zhongli cuddles the ginger as Childe looks at the cor lapis jewel shining brightly in the ring.