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His legs skid across the floor, scars etched into his arms from the earlier battles. Only the faint voice of his brothers call to him, “Leo! Don’t do it-“ He was cut off by another.
“I can’t lose you again.” The other distantly mentions.
Then going against their wishes he grabbed the ‘key’ the foot wished to summon the Krang species. At that, his normal childish smirk resurfaces - the krang attack never happened.
But the beacon continues on, like that his elder brother’s voice booms. “Leo! Get out of here!”
Then the metal armored krang attacks, lunging at him, preparing to kill.
His eyes open immediately, he could’ve died but why didn’t he? The marks on his arms and shell still appearing from cuts and bruises from the armored entity.
His hands shaking and close to his entire being too. Leo rarely sleeps, but when he does, it’s always some form of ghoulish nightmare haunting him.
Maybe to distract himself - be best to check what Donnie is up to. If anything, either early in morning or late in the night he’s tending to something of his technological innovations. If not, maybe researching something.
“Donnie?” His voice still sounding groggy and quiet.
Eyesight blurred a bit only because the intense amount of light was close to being blinding.
As his eyes focused, Donnie wasn’t paying much attention to him. The new presence of his ‘twin’ as he blasts music and drinking a Dr Pepper. Still having 3 other empty cans he possibly drank earlier.
As well his black battle shell normally being placed upon his back isn’t there. Only revealing his soft shell.
The blaring music booming through his headphones. Maybe he has noticed his brother’s attendance. “What is it my esteemed brother?” He mumbles with a hint of annoyance.
With Donnie listening to music - either he is in response loudly or quiet as can be - there is no in between. He normally struggles to tell if he’s too quiet or too loud. Same with conversing with other people.
“I uh, well.”
Donnie rolls his eyes staring at the red eared slider - his “twin.” Surprisingly the marker eyebrows of his move as if he actually had a pair.
“Ok I couldn’t sleep - and I know you always seem to be awake at this time. So I just wanted to see what you’re up to.”
He lied, truly Leonardo wishes for his brothers to worry about him. Ever since the invasion, and him being the leader he needs them to respect him. Along to not be even more paranoid about his mental state.
Leo sighs looking at Donnie with a tired look. The both of them clearly have deep eye bags under their eyes.
Obviously with Donnie since he does have a tendency to stay up late or have less amount of sleep than the rest of his brothers.
But Leo?
He used to sleep a lot (excluding the fact that he fell asleep quite late), Raph would lecture him sometimes for how late he were to sleep in. Sometimes being 2 or 3 pm he would wake.
Telling him he missed some of the best missions he could possibly partake in.
“Nardo, I know you love to annoy me whenever I tend to work.”
“Cause you’re always awake at this time. Uh, and us insomniacs need to stick together!” He fakes a laugh, taking a seat in his lab.
Donnie doesn’t respond, only stays quiet. Some memories of the past linger - when he was a child and couldn’t sleep him and Leo would have random conversations.
Random words to spark one or to continue one hours ago. Maybe too him and Leo had some form of nightmares they assured the other it’s fine.
But once separated - and different rooms - it still would happen rarely. One of the siblings would walk in their room or sleep there to calm their anxieties.
Sometimes the conversations or the presence itself would help.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“No.”
“Actually, maybe. I can’t tell - it’s just I suddenly became the leader all a few years ago. And, god I just didn’t now how to deal with it.”
He stops, not sure what to say then.Possibly and only hoping Donnie will forget this.
“Sorry.”
Donnie stops focusing on his project, looking at his brother in his eyes.“For what?”
“For messing up! The whole reason and we all know it; the kraang attack is because of me! I know it every-time I look at Raph and he does the same - we barely look at eachother and can’t stand it!
“I look at his eye and I know it’s my fault! I’m so sorry for being useless and failing.”
As he continues to look at his brother, remembering hearing the communication systems. Remembering what he heard after he took care of it - hearing the whole thing and trying best to not repeat it.
Because then, reality hit that Leo has done this before.
“Leo, you’re not a failure or useless. Maybe you should talk to Raph about this - or Mikey I bet he would love to help.”
“No, no no!” He continues to protest, almost getting up from his chair.
“I don’t want the rest of the family worried. They already are on edge and you, well you don’t show it as easily!”
“Well um, even dad was worried for you. Well at least when you were yelling at Casey.”
“But that’s the thing! You all are so anxious about me, but trust me. I’m fine, I am the face man!!”
“But - hold on one second, just because you are the reliable one doesn’t mean it’s invalid for you to have meltdowns.” Donnie says in a close to monotone voice reading off a notepad.
“What- are you reading something?”
“Why of course my esteemed brother - it took me weeks to prepare for this conversation.”
“Weeks? Are you serious?”
“Nardo, I am trying to have a genuine moment with you, ok.” He looks away and back at his twin, “But, uh hey if you want a hug you are free to have one. One and only one!”
“Nah, I don’t want your sympathy Donnie.”
“Oh come on, you say how I never like hugs and you want to hug me. You don’t want to miss out on this opportunity do you?”
Leo doesn’t do much in response, only staring at the ceiling. Donnie turns back to his work.
Hands fidgeting with the metal and it’s connectors, “Just remember you’re fine Leo. We defeated the kraang, and what’s better is that we have you.”
“I just know you would’ve loved to leave me there!” He starts to laugh again along with his self decapitating statement.
“Leo do you genuinely believe that?”
“What?” His gaze goes from the ceiling to Donatello.
“It’s not your fault. I know I’ve been a broken record but I don’t know how to continue this. You’re not useless, you’re not just the face man.”
“I am!”
“Well - if you weren’t who would be?” Donnie questions, furrowing your brows staring at Leo.
It was normal for Leo to do this every once and awhile - but a night full of words?
Words that pile up; the words that explain it alll? Now that is rare.
The clock struck 4:30 am. It’s been two hours or so since his entry.
Leo stays silent, eyes surveying the wall behind Donnie. Only but a blank wall with a few shelves full of projects, works in progress, scaling to finished, defective ones.
Some even were ones he requested.
A plethora of bolts and screws keeping it together and in one piece, just like him.
Donnie’s widened eyes fixed on his brother. He says nothing, only staring behind him. Eyes looking as blank as a canvas, too.
“Alright! I’m gonna show you what I’m working on. Maybe try to mention things you like. Things that help ground you.” He sighs, sliding a paper to the side - scribbled writing there he reads off, “things that you care about.”
“Well. You, Raph, Mikey, April, and dad.” His eyes move around while listing them all off. His mind clearing, even though the back of his mind the screaming voices minimize.
The memories of his self sacrificial acts, putting his life on the line still linger.
Going against the kraang, and being close to getting his shell crushed.
Maybe even when Raph could’ve died.
His mind races a bit more, thinking of a possibility if things were changed a smidge.
“That’s.. good. Things you like?”
Leo places the mask of his flamboyant facade back on. To joke about it all again, because in the end - he needs to let them know he’ll be fine as long the others are. “You already know them!”
“Ok, can you list at least five things in this room?”
“Pfft- easy! The books, computer, your Dr Pepper cans, your desk, and your notes. Ok, so how are you?”
“Well. I’ve been trying to work on the wiring and the mother-board chip to Shelldon. Before you came in might I add - but I think I need to require a new chip and and better photo receptors.”
Leo stares at his brother, zoning out before Donnie even could finish another sentence. Whenever Donnie tends to infodump about his inventions; there’s Leo who has a tendency to not listen.
It’s not that he doesn’t like to listen to it. He does; he just gets confused easily.
“He was hit and split in two when the- Wait are you listening!” He snaps looking directly at Leo who was dozing off for a second.
“Yeah, how about next, make the photo receptors blue.” His voice trails on. Starting to be slower reacting to the noises Don makes.
“I might keep it in my mental notes.” He mutters, having a quiet voice.
“Hey Don.”
“Yes?”
“Nah nevermind. You’d think it’s a stupid question.”
“Nah shoot, go for it.”
“Ok ok, is portal chopped a good one liner?”
“You know what - sure!” He retorts back, lying only to make sure Leo can allow himself to sleep.
“Ok good.” He forms a smile and closes his eyes again and again. Struggling to manage to be awake, and to keep listening to his so called twin.
As Donnie keeps glancing towards his brother and back at Shelldon, keeping eyes on him.
To be there to help him if he has another panic attack. Or anything of the sort.
Sure he possibly didn’t help assisting in his brother’s mental state as well as Mikey or Raph could’ve-
but he tried.
And maybe his words worked, even if he struggles the most with that criteria.
“Goodnight Nardo.”