Work Text:
Perhaps, Chanyeol thinks, he should've his head surgically removed from his ass considering how far up it is.
This is the story of how he (almost) lost the most valuable thing a person can ever dream of having: love.
Park Chanyeol had never been exceptionally clever in any sense or form. Sure he isn't exactly stupid, but his friends do often tell him about his shortcomings when it comes to his observational skills and maybe in the common sense field. Or maybe he should just get new friends who wouldn't insult his intelligence now and again and would rather encourage him to do better, or something along that line. But one thing is obvious, Park Chanyeol is oblivious. When it comes to friendship, when it comes to insults, and when it comes to feelings and emotions and, generally anything related to that.
There was Do Kyungsoo, short (his most defining feature, if you asked Chanyeol), big eyes (Chanyeol used to think they were scary) round face and weird lips (Chanyeol refused to admit that they looked really plump and kissable because he didn't understand why he'd think about Do Kyungsoo's lips like that, because he was and is oblivious about feelings and emotions and generally anything related to that). And Do Kyungsoo was scary but he was also surprisingly funny when he decided to let his 'someone murdered my entire family and I was reborn for revenge' persona rest and crack a joke or two. And Chanyeol used to think how light and deep and nice Kyungsoo's voice was and how it rubbed him up the wrong way, that is, it made him want to close his eyes and take a deep breath and ask Kyungsoo to sing for him. Which was weird, definitely. Because Kyungsoo never sang and even if he did, Chanyeol doubt he'd like it. Kyungsoo would probably sing like a tortured soul asking for salvation. Or something. Because Chanyeol didn't think he'd have any reason to like Kyungsoo's singing.
Not when he believed that Kyungsoo had a crush on Ji Yeon-Hee. The Ji Yeon-Hee Chanyeol had been trying to ask out but was too chicken to actually go through it at the last moment. Not surprisingly because in the words of his best friend Kim Kai, he was a chicken, followed by an imitation of weird chicken noises that didn't sound like chicken noises at all because Kim Kai didn't know how to imitate chickens.
Ji Yeon-hee, a fair young maiden (as Kim Kai would say because he's a little shit), Chanyeol's all time crush (since middle school), a really nice girl, a bit shy (Chanyeol loved how her cheeks would grow visibly red when she's embarrassed), a bit of an odd ball (like Chanyeol!) but strangely popular around the school despite her shy nature. Chanyeol had known her since they were in diapers, hard not to when they grewp up in the same neighborhood, a neighborhood that has no qualm about privacy. She used to bully him when they were young, but would protect him from other bullies, until towards the end of middle school when she became suddenly shy— about everything.
Chanyeol never understood why she stopped hanging out with him, but he didn't try to force his way into her life either. He just pined after her from distance. Well, he didn't know he was pining until they entered high school and Kim Kai smacked him on the head and told him, very aggressively, that Park Chanyeol liked Ji Yeon-hee. Yes, the news shocked Chanyeol dumb. He had to wait for two, three days until the realisation finally hit him and he panicked and fussed over the matter for, well, a week. And then he accepted that, yes, he liked Ji Yeon-hee. And, yes, he's planning on asking her out.
But that was two and a half years ago. And now they're in their last year of high school and he had yet to confess. And he felt like he should do it before they leave for college because if he didn't, he'd lose his chance. Probably not, but it did feel like that. So Chanyeol was hell-bent on confessing before graduation.
Which brought the problem, in the form of Do Kyungsoo, to light. Normally, Chanyeol never had a problem with any other guy he knew was interested in Ji Yeon-hee because he knew he surpassed them all, in looks and in personality (and also, in academic achievements but his friends would disagree- he didn't care though). But Do Kyungsoo, he was different. Because Kyungsoo was handsome, he was cute, and he was smart and he had so many skills, like cooking! And he was charming, and a gentleman when he wanted to be. And when he smiled he lit up the whole room, and sometimes Chanyeol swore he could hear a chorus on the rare time Kyungsoo actually let loose those hard-earned chuckles. So, yeah, Kyungsoo had so much more to give than Chanyeol possibly could. Which had meant that he got a competition.
Chanyeol first found out Kyungsoo was interested in Ji Yeon-hee when he overheard Kyungsoo saying Ji Yeon-hee's name when greeting her. This may seemed like such an insignificant detail but the thing was, Chanyeol sighed to himself, Kyungsoo never remembered people's name and he had no reason to greet strangers he never conversed with. Why would he, out of nowhere (or so it seemed to Chanyeol), care enough to remember some random girl's name if not because he had his eyes on her. Chanyeol actually felt his heart doing a flip and a cartwheel (without any arms involved, if that's even possible) as soon as he heard Kyungsoo greeting Ji Yeon-hee with her name and a little nod of his head.
Chanyeol was by no means a drama queen (he was), but he often took things a bit too serious, too fast (the wrong things, specifically). So when he realised he finally got a worthy opponent, he decided to give it his all. So, instead of watching Do Kyungsoo from afar like a creep (HE WASN'T!) he finally decided to approach him and befriend him. Which went well. Kyungsoo was initially surprised. Of course he was, Park Chanyeol and Do Kyungsoo did not only orbit in a different path, they were also galaxies away. Park Chanyeol was outgoing, despite him being an odd ball people seemed to really dig his easy going nature and happy go lucky personality. He was everything Kyungsoo was not. He was an open book, while Do Kyungsoo was Fort Knox. Park Chanyeol would shake the whole classroom laughing his lungs out and Do Kyungsoo would frown beside him (he wouldn't, actually, he'd just huff out a quiet laugh because his presence wasn't as imposing as Chanyeol, who seemed to be larger than life; if anything, he certainly was larger than Kyungsoo, a fact he never let Kyungsoo forget during their short friendship).
So, yes, Kyungsoo was nonplussed when Chanyeol suddenly, out of nowhere, came to him and strike up a conversation one day as if they had known each other their whole life. But Kyungsoo, ever the polite yet a bit distant person that he was, engaged him in a conversation that started with, "How you doing, Kyungsoo?" and ended with, "Come hang out at my house this weekend." And Kyungsoo agreed. Which in turn surprised Chanyeol, because he truly didn't believe he'd get that far. But he did, and he left Kyungsoo alone with a new energetic skip in his step as he walked away towards the classroom.
After that it was one hangout after another. Park Chanyeol would walk down the corridor with a booming voice talking about nothing and everything and Do Kyungsoo would quietly walked beside him with a huff and a puff because when Chanyeol became too involved in the mostly one sided conversation he was having, he'd forget that he's taller than most people and he'd walk faster than he normally would and Kyungsoo would have to take larger steps than his legs were made to do so to keep up with him. But he nerver complained. And Chanyeol never realised until they'd reach their classroom and he'd look at Kyungsoo and see that he was a little red in the face and he'd think how adorable, and his hand had once moved of its own accord and lightly framed that warm cheek and Kyungsoo had turned a bit more red except he'd wonder why he'd have such thoughts about Kyungsoo and the mystery of why Kyungsoo looked a little red than usual would completely slip away. Kyungsoo never complained. But Kim Kai would shake his head and give Chanyeol a disapproving head shake when he went and sat down beside him.
"I think I'd ask her out tomorrow." Chanyeol declared one afternoon, clutching his bento box tightly as he stopped in the middle of stuffing his mouth full of the food Kyungsoo prepared for himself but always ended up giving most if not all to Chanyeol. He nodded in determination. "Tomorrow, surely."
"Who?" Kyungsoo asked, appearing a bit more curious than he used to be.
"Ji Yeon-hee." Chanyeol whispered.
"Oh." Kyungsoo said. He put down his chopsticks.
Chanyeol took the remaining portion of food left in Kyungsoo's box, thinking he was done eating.
"Yes." He said, not knowing why exactly but it seemed like the right thing to say. "Kai would give me these looks, you know. I have no idea what they meant but I think it's to prompt me to finally confess instead of just. You know. Walking around it. I mean, I think I should."
Kyungsoo was silent and Chanyeol forgot that Kyungsoo also liked Ji Yeon-hee.
"What do you think?" Park Chanyeol asked because he was an absolute moron. And he was stuffing his face full to avoid thinking about how adorable the little crease between Kyungsoo's eyebrows was when he's frowning.
"Hmm." Kyungsoo hummed and he seemed to be a universe away from Chanyeol. "Maybe."
"That's not a definitive 'yes'."
"You should." Kyungsoo said, giving him a smile (and if it slipped Chanyeol's mind that it looked a bit more tight than Kyungsoo's rare and usual smile, then all the better for everyone involved).
"So, do you sing?" Chanyeol asked instead because he had always wanted to ask but never had the courage to. And he felt the tension, which he believed only he felt, and wanted to dissipate it.
Kyungsoo seemed to be taken aback by the sudden question. Although it made sense, because Chanyeol had never been to his house even though they had been friends for a couple of months and Chanyeol didn't know much about Kyungsoo, not as much as Kyungsoo knew about Chanyeol. Because Chanyeol done the talking in their friendship and Kyungsoo listened. And that worked out for them. And Kyungsoo never complained. And Chanyeol never found anything wrong with it.
"If you don't want to tell me, that's totally cool." Chanyeol was quick to assure because he understood that Kyungsoo valued his privacy and he didn't want to lose one of the best friends he had ever had over some stuid question that he was too inquisitive to not ask.
Kyungsoo shook his head with a smile (a wry smile), "I do. I... sometimes write my own songs. I play guitar, too."
Wow. Just. Wow. That's completely news to Chanyeol (it wasn't, he had actually known Kyungsoo played guitar, but he didn't know he sang though, certainly didn't know about the song writing either). Also, that was the most Kyungsoo had ever revealed about himself.
"Awesome." Chanyeol said, because he was lame and because he really thought that was awesome. Chanyeol loved music with every fiber of his being. He still does. Although he couldn't exactly sing, he loved music and any instrument he could learn, he did. One day, he hoped he'd be able to play for Kyungsoo. And Kyungsoo would sing. That'd be perfect. Another reason why their friendship was as sure as set in stone. They fit so well together.
Before he could come up with more things about how they were literally matchmade in heaven (platonically, of course) Kyungsoo cleared the desk and closed his bento box. He also cleared his throat as he stood up.
"Have to put this away." He mumbled as he left for his seat.
Chanyeol looked at him walk away, completely missing Ji Yeon-hee walking in with two friends. Actually, no. He saw them. He saw her. He was just... preoccupied with Kyungsoo and his odd behaviour. Park Chanyeol was oblivious, yes, but even he knew when one of his closest friends act a little different than usual. And although his eyes soon after follow Yeon-hee, they kept coming back to Kyungsoo's back that was leaving the classroom. Without waiting for Chanyeol. Do Kyungsoo always waited for Chanyeol. To finish his lunch. To finish using the bathroom. To finish his homework. To get ready for school. To get ready to leave school. To go to the vending machine to buy a nice can of cold coffee so they could drink together, sitting down on the bench under a sakura tree on the ground after lunch and people-gaze together until afternoon class started. Chanyeol wondered why Kyungsoo left without him.
He couldn't find Kyungsoo until class started again that day. He still wonders where Kyungsoo went and disappeared.
Chanyeol didn't ask Ji Yeon-hee out the next day. Or the day after that. Not for another several days. He was too busy trying to come up with a valid reason why Kyungsoo had left without waiting for him the day before. When he asked Kim Kai, the useless little shit had just sighed, called him stupid (unnecessarily rude, since all Chanyeol did was asking him a question) and told him to go figure it out himself. Chanyeol tried to, but he drew blank. And Kyungsoo was back to his normal self the next day, albeit a bit more reserved but Chanyeol was familiar with it, so Chanyeol dropped the subject. Except he didn't, he was still wondering, but he had decided against asking Kyungsoo about it. Incase he left him again, and Chanyeol didn't want that. It was weird to break their little tradition and he didn't want to go through another afternoon without Kyungsoo's warm presence beside him, sitting under the shade and talking about nothing and everything, shoulders brushing. Chanyeol wondered why Kim Kai called him stupid, and he still thought it was unnecessary, although deserved.
Chanyeol asked if Kyungsoo would like to come over to his house, Kyungsoo declined citing too many homework to complete and final year exam drawing closer and closer. Which reminded Chanyeol of his little mission: asking out Ji Yeon-hee before highschool ended.
Chanyeol asked Kyungsoo to come over for weekends. Kyungsoo declined.
Chanyeol asked Ji Yeon-hee out on a date on Friday evening after walking her home from school, because Kyungsoo declined his offer to spend the evening together. And Ji Yeon-hee agreed. Chanyeol smiled at the way her cheeks turned bright red before she said yes. And Chanyeol wondered how Kyungsoo would look when he was embarrassed. Then Chanyeol remembered how Kyungsoo's cheeks would slightly turn pink after their short trek down the corridors and towards their classroom, and he smiled even wider.
And Ji Yeon-hee kissed him on the cheek with a little huff before she ran inside her house.
Chanyeol crossed the small road between Ji Yeon-hee's house and his, in a daze, wondering how soft Yeon-hee's lips were on his cheeks; and if anyone had ever kissed Kyungsoo's cheeks, or if he had ever kissed anyone's cheeks. Chanyeol couldn't sleep that night wondering why Kyungsoo lately refused to come over and what he should wear for his date the day after.
Chanyeol went on a date with Ji Yeon-hee the next day. Everything was perfect and she was perfect and he loved every moment they spent together. It was like reminiscing their childhood. The better part, where she would save him from the bullies and called him a coward for not defending himself before taking him to a shop and buying them both a popsicle each with all the money she'd saved up. And they would eat it together on the playground even though it was autumn and it was sort of chilly but neither of them cared because they were friends, and they were having the best time any children could ever have, even though there was a trace of dried blood on Chanyeol's nose and Ji Yeon-hee's hands were scruffy and her hair a mess from chasing off those bullies. Chanyeol felt like he was transported back straight to the past and Ji Yeon-hee had looked like she was enjoying the present... their date.
Chanyeol couldn't figure out why it seemed like something felt wrong. Like a puzzle piece that didn't fit. But he was enjoying himself and Ji Yeon-hee was enjoying herself, and he smiled and she smiled. So Chanyeol pressed down on that single piece until it chipped off on the corner and loosely fit between the other pieces, and while the whole puzzle was still inaccurate, unsatisfactory, who cared. He was dating his long time crush and he didn't think there could be any better feeling than that.
Monday came rolling and Kyungsoo hardly talked to Chanyeol. Not that Chanyeol particularly tried hard to talk to him either.
The news of Park Chanyeol and Ji Yeon-hee going out on a date spread like a wildfire. It seemed to Chanyeol like everyone was interested in their relationship, even the people he hardly ever knew or talked to. They'd come up to him, asked how he could possibly pull someone like Yeon-hee, either that or they'd gush about how they saw this coming a long, long time ago and how they had always hoped they'd end up together because they just "complemented each other". Chanyeol would just smiled and thanked them, when it seemed appropriate.
He did try to talk to Kyungsoo before class started though, but he couldn't find him and Yeon-hee was there and she was offering him a warm smile and he thought, I could always find him during lunch, before he went and have a seat next to Yeon-hee.
He never found Kyungsoo during lunch. Not that he tried particularly hard because Yeon-hee was there and she was smiling at him and asked if he'd like to have lunch with her, and there was that lately ever-present red blots on her face and he was drawn in more than he thought. So, no Kyungsoo, but a delicious lunch with Ji Yeon-hee. And after lunch, when he looked around for Kyungsoo and couldn't find him in the classroom before he could leave to look around the school grounds, Yeon-hee asked if he'd like to walk around the school and maybe find a quiet spot, Chanyeol forgot about his mission and went with her.
Park Chanyeol kissed Ji Yeon-hee and he saw brown, doe eyes and round cheeks lightly dusted pink and even though they weren't as red as Yeon-hee's cheeks usually were, he assumed those red cheeks were so unique even his mind couldn't replicate them and continued to kiss her in the deserted classroom.
Park Chanyeol kissed Ji Yeon-hee that day, completely unaware of the quiet crowd of classmates standing right outside of the classroom peeking at them through the half-opened door because there was nothing teenagers loved more than gossips.
Park Chanyeol kissed Ji Yeon-hee on a Monday afternoon completely unaware of the exact pair of brown eyes he saw in his mind watching him with a furrowed set of brows from outside the classroom.
Park Chanyeol failed to hear Do Kyungsoo's quiet and sure steps walking away from him and the friendship they had carefully crafted and carved out together to fit them perfectly.
Park Chanyeol kissed Ji Yeon-hee for the first time and he felt guilt stirring in his stomach, so he cupped her cheeks in his hand and wondered how warm they were but didn't seem to fit in his palms, but they were so warm.
Park Chanyeol lost the most important thing in his life and he didn't even realise it until it was too late.
Kim Kai called Park Chanyeol stupid and Park Chanyeol just playfully shoved him. Kim Kai never called him stupid again and Park Chanyeol wished he had done more.
Park Chanyeol and Ji Yeon-hee's relationship became old news soon after a month passed and people hardly bat an eye when they saw them walking together, coming to school, going home from school, or trying to find a quiet spot to make out during lunch. No one seemed to care anymore and Chanyeol could finally have a breather and he started to wonder where Kyungsoo was.
He did see Kyungsoo every once in a while: during the morning assembly, in the corridor, in the classroom, during lunch and before going home. But he never had any time to strike up a conversation except for a short greetings like "hey", "hi". He felt like Kyungsoo was purposefully avoiding him but he also knew that he didn't exactly make time for Kyungsoo after his new relationship, so he didn't had the guts to confront and call out Kyungsoo on it without proper evidence to base his argument on— evidence he didn't have. So, he didn't talk to Kyungsoo and Kyungsoo was most definitely, probably, possibly, maybe, perhaps avoiding him. But Chanyeol never tried particularly hard to get Kyungsoo's attention.
Park Chanyeol sat under the shade of a sakura tree on the school grounds with Ji Yeon-hee sitting beside him, resting her head on his shoulder, talking about this and that. And Park Chanyeol looked across the field, towards a lone figure sitting down on a bench without any proper shade of a tree, head down, reading the textbook laying opened on his lap. Park Chanyeol wondered what Kyungsoo would continue to study once they were out of high school. He wondered if he ever asked Kyungsoo that before.
"Do you think so?" Ji Yeon-hee asked.
And Park Chanyeol hummed as he was plagued with the terrible feeling that something was terribly wrong.
Six years later and Park Chanyeol is standing under the sun on the grounds of his old high school, staring at a lone figure sitting on a bench under the shade of a sakura tree, facing away from him. Six years later and Chanyeol thinks, did he even grow after all those years?
Six years later and Do Kyungsoo is still as tiny and perfect as he always had been.
Six years later and Chanyeol finally understands why his heart has always felt like it was doing a somersault when he'd stand near Kyungsoo, and why he wants to reach out and cup Kyungsoo's face in his hand, why he always wondered how Kyungsoo's lips would feel like, or how he'd look after a kiss, or if his cheeks would turn red or if he would glare at Chanyeol if he was to kiss him. On the cheek, on the forehead, on the nose, on the neck, on the hand, or on the lips. Park Chanyeol wants to laugh at himself but he doesn't.
Park Chanyeol stares at Do Kyungsoo's back until the sun sets and Do Kyungsoo stands up from the bench and turns around, towards Chanyeol.
Park Chanyeol smiles at Do Kyungsoo and Do Kyungsoo's eyes widen in wonder.
Park Chanyeol approaches Do Kyungsoo and Do Kyungsoo smiles at him, asking a million questions with his eyes— but Park Chanyeol, who could hardly even interpret Kim Kai's obvious and clear and admittedly mean message back then, in high school, has a really hard time reading what those questions are. Because Park Chanyeol is oblivious about feelings and emotions and anything generally relating to that. But it's okay, it's alright, Kyungsoo can just ask them out loud. And Park Chanyeol would love to answer them.