Work Text:
CLEANING AGENTS
Four frowned, her tongue poking out of one corner of her mouth, as she leaned over the canvas and brushed one last tint of yellow under the cloud. She checked it against the picture she’d torn from a magazine, frowned, and compared it to the picture again. She’d put it with the other rejects later. "Gidgit, I'm done!" she called, and set the canvas in the center of the rickety table to dry. Then she dropped her paint palette on the floor. Paint splattered everywhere.
With a clicking whirr of wheels, a tiny Squee-G darted forward, only to stop an inch away from the mess. Its lights flashed--red red red yellow red yellow red yellow--and it moved back and forth on its wheels, waiting.
Four grinned. "Go ahead."
With a delighted whir, the Squee-G rushed forward, flashing bright yellow. It darted on and around the palette first, leaving behind clean white plastic and ancient clean tile, then darted around for all the drips and drabs. Four added more as she cleaned her paintbrushes, only noticing the Squee-G when it bumped her toes.
Four sat on the floor and gathered the Squee-G in her lap. "Was it worth the wait, Gidgit?" she asked, and giggled as it beeped at her and cleaned the wet paint she'd splattered on her pants, leaving only stains behind. Not long after, Four found herself lying on the ground, Gidgit whirring all over her, cleaning up all the paint Four got everywhere--even her nose. "That tickles!"
Gidgit beeped twice and bumped Four's nose again, glowing a soft blue. Four rubbed its back and set it carefully beside her, then sat up. Her eyes caught on her clock. "Squit. Eight'll be here soon."
Four leapt to her feet and searched through her apartment, determined to be ready when her friend knocked. She needed proper turfing gear, not the crummy clothes she used for painting. Her dualies weren’t on their hooks by her paintings of the other agents or mixed with the messy stack of blank canvases and Inkblot applications Marie kept giving her. Dualies, dualies, where were her—Four spotted them under her bed and got on the floor to retrieve them.
She was so absorbed in her search she didn't realize someone else was in her apartment until she heard the shriek.
Four jumped, banged her head on the bottom of the bed, and rolled out. She aimed at the intruder. "I don't know who you are, but--Eight?"
Eight crouched on the pile of boxes Four used as a shelf by the door, tentacles spread for balance. "Four! There be a vicious Squee-G in you pad!"
Squit .
"Why you dualies bottom top?"
Double squit. Four swapped the dualies between her hands.
The boxes collapsed under Eight's weight. Gidgit whirred and dashed forward. Eight shrieked again and leaped on top of Four's bed, but Gidgit was just cleaning up the broken pens and markers. Eight left the door open, and Gidgit was way too close; Four darted over, slammed the door shut, and turned.
Eight had her art supplies and was chucking them at Gidgit.
"WOAH, STOP!" Four yelled. She blocked the next thrown paintbrush with her body, dropped her dualies, and gathered Gidgit in her arms. Gidgit beeped at her and nestled against Four's body as more art supplies hit them. Four shielded Gidgit with her body until the pelting stopped.
Four peeked behind her to see Eight still on the bed, hands full of markers, a pencil case stuck to one sucker. "Don't tell Marie.”
"You arm a Squee-G?" Eight asked, eyes wide.
Four scooted around until she could face Eight, still on her knees on the floor. "Uh, I think you mean I hold a Squee-G, not that I'm arming it. And, um, Gidgit is my pet." Four crossed her legs and settled Gidgit in her lap. It whirred unhappily, flashing its light red faster than Four liked. She scratched it between its eyes with one finger
"It not slurp you?"
"Of course not," Four said. Gidgit’s red flashing slowed, so Four looked up at Eight again—Eight, still perched on the bed, though at least she’s stopped throwing things. "Gidgit nibbles on the ends of my tentacles sometimes, but it'd never hurt me, even if it was big enough."
Eight started removing things from her suckers, but kept them close by. Four shifted a little, not quite willing to put Gidgit down and give Eight a clear target. "Why are you in here, anyway?" she asked. "I thought we were going to meet by the front doors."
"I there, you not there," Eight said, pulling at a ruler stuck to the top of her head. "So I come here. Handle loose, door open!" The ruler broke. Eight made a face and left the rest of it attached.
"Haven't you ever heard of knocking?"
"What is knocking?"
Four decided right then that Three was pulling her tentacles when he told her Eight lived with Off the Hook. No way would she live with anyone famous and not know about knocking.
"Squee-G is danger," Eight continued. "Why you have Squee-G?"
Four sighed again. "Gidgit isn't dangerous." Gidgit shifted on her lap, wanting to get down and move, and Four scritched above its wheels until it gave up and purred, flashing green. "But when I was--I was doing patrols, and going through kettles, and you never see just one Squee-G alone. There are always two or three others nearby, usually a big one for every two or three babies, but not then." Four frowned, remembering; it was one of the first kettles she'd ever gone in, and poor Gidgit had been a lot slower and quieter than the first time Four'd been there. It fell off the wall at Four’s feet, and Four had shot some ink right in its mouth and it got up, shook itself, and nudged her feet for more. "But Gidgit was alone, and so I took it home, and I love it."
Eight shook her head, tentacles loose around her shoulders, half a ruler still stuck to one. " Inklings, " she said, in a tone that indicated everything wrong with them.
Four shrugged. "Come on, I know Octolings must keep Squee-G's for something, too. I released enough of them from cages when I went after Callie."
Eight’s tentacles wrapped around her shoulders. "Many Octarians splat splat splat to cage a Squee-G. Then it stop moving, and Octarians safe."
Four's stomach dropped. She clutched Gidgit close to her, then released it as Gidgit struggled. "You starve them?"
"It keep Octo-lands safe!" Eight clenched her hands into fists. "They eat ink, they eat us."
"They don't have any other food down there," Four said. "Watch." Four set Gidgit on the floor. "Stay.”
Gidgit beeped a few times, but didn't move.
Four went to her kitchen, ignored the stinger forming in her sink, and grabbed some stuff. While Gidgit's beeps got louder and louder, lights flashing yellow with attention, Four put various things in puddles and piles on the floor: honey, maple syrup, several squiddymelon cubes, even some paint. Finally, Four picked up one dualie; without an ink tank, she couldn't shoot much, but enough for a puddle.
Four joined Eight on the bed. "Gidgit will go after her favorite first.”
Gidgit beeped frantically, rolling back and forth on its wheels, and turned to face Four.
"Ready?" Four asked.
"I, uh..." Eight wrapped one tentacle around Four’s shoulders and squeezed. "Yes."
"Gidgit, okay!" Four said, and Gidgit rushed forwards. To Eight's surprise it tackled the paint first, then the squiddymelon cubes, lights flashing a rainbow. Honey and maple syrup came next, Gidgit darting between them, but it didn't finish either; it let out a sharp chirp, then swiveled around to sit at the base of the bed, lights blinking a slow blue..
The pile of ink was untouched.
Eight released her legs at last. "Squiddymelon?"
"Gidgit likes other fruits, too, but melons and squash are its favorite." Four leaned off the bed to scoop it up and set it on her lap; Eight released Four and scrambled a few feet away. Gidgit flashed its lights green twice. Four ran her hand down Gidgit’s back. "Would you like to pet it?"
Eight’s tentacles writhed as she stared at Gidgit, falling asleep on Four's lap. Eight extended one trembling hand, then, as Four nodded, put one finger on Gidgit's back with exaggerated slowness. She stroked it. Again. The third time, Eight's lips turned up in a smile. "It's vibrating."
"I think that's a purr," Four said. "Like Judd." She held still, smiling at Eight, as Eight's tentacles relaxed and Eight started petting Gidgit with her whole hand and her smile grew. "Can I give food?" Eight asked.
"Gidgit's full," Four said. "I gave her a lot , and it'll finish up the honey and maple syrup later. But next time, call before you come in? And--" Four's phone buzzed.
Four pulled it out to see Three had sent them a text: Did Eight get lost again?
She wanted to see my art supplies , Four texted back. "Three's waiting," Four said. “Can you hold it? I have to get changed.”
“I, uh, how do I--”
Four shifted Gidgit to Eight's lap, smiling at Eight's squeal, and ducked into the bathroom to change. When she emerged, she saw Eight petting Gidgit, a tiny smile on her face, with Gidgit fast asleep on Eight’s lap, all its lights dimmed. "Don't tell anyone about Gidgit, okay? I don't think I'm supposed to have it."
"I keep secret," Eight said, giving Gidgit one more stroke before Four moved the sleeping Squee-G to the pillow. Eight hopped off the bed and followed Four as Four grabbed her dualies and led the way down the stairs. "Four?" she asked, broken ruler still attached to one sucker
"Yeah?" Four figured she’d need help getting the ruler off.
"What is 'pet'?"
Four sighed and closed her eyes. Sometimes, there could be real drawbacks to having an Octoling as a teammate.
But, as Eight hugged Four around the shoulders with one tentacle, there were plenty more benefits.
