Chapter Text
In that instant, everything Lena knew had changed and she can’t help but chuckle darkly at this latest tilting of her axis.
Looking down at the results in her hands she tries to convince herself it is a mistake, some cruel joke her lab equipment is playing on her. After all, there is no possible way this could be accurate - which is why she runs it a second time.
And then a third.
Fourth.
After the fifth, she slumps, defeated, onto a stool and lets her head fall to the large workbench before her. Feeling the cool countertop against her heated skin allows her to breathe just a bit easier, momentarily quieting the chaos currently reigning in her mind.
The results should be impossible and yet they stubbornly remain the same, mocking her with their repeatability, proving a hypothesis that makes no reasonable sense.
Lena silently acknowledges to herself that she has seen plenty of impossible things recently and had even performed a few impossibilities herself in helping her friends defeat Lex and Nyxly. This, though, is a level beyond the magic she still struggles to accept running through her veins.
As thoughts of science and magic whirl together, Lena is distracted from her spiral by the sound of footsteps entering the tower. In a flurry of panicked motion, she stands and clears away results from her tablet and the lab’s computer screens, pulling up a general search for unusual energy spikes just as Alex enters the lab, dressed neatly in grey slacks and a pale blue button-up shirt.
“Lena! Hey! I have a huge favor to ask you,” Alex rushes out, glancing up from the phone in her hand to Lena standing before the row of consoles near the center of the room, pausing suddenly with a look of suspicion. “What’s wrong? You’re paler than usual.”
“What? I– nothing. That’s a bit insulting. What kind of favor?” Lena feigns innocence, hoping to distract the ridiculously perceptive elder Danvers sister. Narrowed eyes are her only answer and as Alex types something quickly on her phone, places it into her pocket, and looks back with a raised brow, Lena knows she isn’t fooled. “Alex– “
“Lena.” Alex interrupts petulantly before sighing and stepping closer to lean a hip against the workbench, crossing her arms. As she continues, her tone is serious in that sisterly way that always makes Lena just the slightest bit emotional in its complete acceptance of her as a member of the family. “What’s going on? I haven’t seen that look on your face since we almost lost Kara to the Phantom Zone.”
Flinching slightly at the reminder of their near miss, Lena debates brushing Alex off. Even comes up with a few potential diversions in the seconds before she sees the look in the other woman’s eyes.
Alex is concerned.
For her.
Lena’s breath still catches at the realization that this group of people – Kara, Alex, Nia, Kelly, Brainy, and J’onn – loves her as much as she loves them.
The walls she’d built and fortified over the years are all but rubble in the face of that.
“I’m not sure,” Lena relents, pulling up the previous results she’d rushed off the screen. “I haven’t been feeling well the past couple of weeks. Persistent nausea, fatigue, cramping, and a loss of appetite. I’ve also been a bit . . . sensitive, recently.” Lena recalls getting misty-eyed at a damn Tide commercial earlier in the week. She glances up to see Alex’s eyes growing steadily wider as she looks over the screens, “and I’m late.”
“You’re, but, when, who?” Alex stumbles for words. This is not anywhere close to what she had been expecting. A new big bad? Sure, no problem. This? Well, this could be something amazing or devastating, depending on the exact circumstances. Which side it falls on really depends on Lena and it depends on Alex’s reaction and - oh no, Kara. She will be destroyed, but she will rip her heart in half to be there for Lena if that’s what Lena needs. How had this happened? Had Lena been– without anyone realizing? She is an adult, of course, she can do whatever she pleases, but Alex thought she and Kara. . .
“Alex. Breathe.”
Lena feels Alex jump as she places a trembling hand on her arm. The rush of thoughts is all but painted above the older girl’s head as she makes the obvious connection between symptoms and results. Alex’s gaze snaps back to Lena, a little wild, but no less concerned.
“Are you okay?”
Lena can’t help it. She laughs. Loudly and nearly buckling under the weight of it.
Too quickly and without her consent, she tips over the razor’s edge she’s been balanced on, the laughter catching on a sob and before she knows it, tears are blazing trails down her cheeks.
She feels herself wrapped tightly in Alex’s arms, surrounded by warmth and the sound of murmuring platitudes as a hand rubs circles at her back. Lena revels in the connection, for once just allowing herself to sink deeper into the protection of Alex’s embrace. It feels, even just fleetingly, like the world can’t touch her here. Like the nausea roiling in her gut is just nervous butterflies and not what she doesn’t want to accept it as.
Eons pass before Lena feels strong enough to pull back, swiping at the wetness of her cheeks and focusing anywhere but into the deep brown eyes looking pityingly back at her.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
Lena shakes her head, not trusting herself to speak lest the dam breaks again.
Alex sighs, rubbing a hand at the back of her neck, scratching at the short hairs there. She turns, finally, away from Lena to look more closely at the tablet Lena had left on the workbench. Calculating hormone levels and timelines in her head, she looks back at the younger woman questioningly.
Lena can read the conclusion on Alex’s face and had drawn the same herself. It would have had to have been sometime around Alex and Kelly’s wedding, almost two months past. Lena nods imperceptibly.
“James?” Alex looks as disturbed with the thought as she is herself.
Lena scoffs, dismissing it quickly with a disgusted curl of her lip. “No. Absolutely not.” She is grimly amused to see Alex release a breath she must have been holding like she’d been preparing herself for an unwelcome confirmation.
Lena sighs again as she can clearly see Alex’s mind working as if to narrow down a suspect pool. She decides it would be better to just tell Alex and avoid dragging at least one line of questioning out longer than necessary. That isn’t to say the answer doesn’t have its own, even more massive list of questions associated. Better to get to that particular mystery rather than delay.
“Kara.”
“Hmm?” Alex looks up from the tablet she had gone back to studying. “What about Kara?”
Silently cursing that Alex can’t simply read her mind, Lena pinches the bridge of her nose, feeling her ever-present nausea beginning to rise with an oncoming headache. There were times when Alex was so perceptive, and you needn’t actually tell her anything for her to discern an entire story. Why couldn’t this have been one of those times?
“The only person I’ve,” Lena pauses, “been intimate with. Since before Crisis, I haven’t been with anyone, except - Kara and I, after your wedding, we . . .”
Alex’s eyes widen and she holds up a hand, looking like she wants desperately to flee as the connotation becomes clear. “I do not need to hear the details, please. Lena, I love you and I obviously also love Kara, and while I am so glad you two finally did something about all that sexual tension, I really don’t need to hear the specifics.” She stops, looking confused again and maybe a little hurt. “Wait? Have you two been . . . together. . . since the wedding, or before? Why didn’t you guys tell us?”
Lena is shaking her head before Alex can finish her questions, reeling slightly from Alex’s insinuation that there was sexual tension between her and Kara.
“We’re not together. The night of the wedding, we talked, and we drank, and one thing led to another . . .” Lena is pretty sure sighing is an integral part of her vocabulary at this point. “We haven’t discussed it since. I tried bringing it up after but then CatCo or Supergirl stuff always seems to come up and I’m pretty sure she’s been avoiding the subject ever since.”
“Yeah, that sounds like Kara. I’m sure she’s just scared you’re going to tell her it was a mistake so she’s putting it off for as long as she can. Was it?”
“Was it what?”
“A mistake.”
Lena hadn’t really thought about it, she realizes. She had been so frustrated at not being able to talk with Kara about it and then so worried and confused at the apparent consequences, she hadn’t stopped to think about whether she regretted that night or not. She didn’t think she did. Kara is the best friend she’s ever had, and Lena is at least in a place to acknowledge that the feelings she has for the superhero run deeper than friendship. Does she wish the circumstances around their first night together had been a little bit clearer between them? Absolutely. But, no, she doesn’t regret it. Even with the impossible aftermath, Lena isn’t sure it could ever have been a mistake.
“I wish we had talked about it first, cleared some things up, but no. I don’t think it was.”
“Okay.” Alex nods, accepting. “Now, the question is – how did this even happen and what happens now?”
Lena is interrupted from answering as the elevator dings, its doors opening to the sound of little feet running across the tower. As Alex clears results from the screens, Lena turns to see Esme barreling into the lab, braided hair flowing behind her, with her favorite stuffed animal tucked under an elbow. Kelly enters at a more casual pace, chuckling, and greeting Lena with a wave and Alex with a kiss as Esme nearly bowls Lena over to hug her legs in hello.
“Aunt Lena! Hi!”
“Esme! Be careful, sweetie. You nearly knocked Aunt Lena down,” Kelly admonishes softly, reaching out to steady Lena’s teetering form.
“I’m sorry Aunt Lena.”
Lena softens. There is no way she could be even annoyed at the little girl before her, innocent, and lovely, and so enamored with her godmother. She extracts herself from Esme’s arms to kneel before her and give her a proper squeeze, playfully groaning as the girl’s little arms wrap as tightly around her as she can.
“Oof, that’s a very strong hug! Aunt Kara is going to be so jealous!”
Lena stands, bringing the giggling Esme with her, and settling the child at her hip, tapping a tiny nose with her finger before turning back to Kelly and Alex.
“To what do I owe the surprise visit?” She asks Kelly.
“I’ve been invited to an impromptu dinner with a few colleagues. Did Alex not already tell you?” She turns to her wife curiously, rolling her eyes at the sheepish shrug she gets in response. “We were hoping you could watch Esme for a couple of hours. I know it’s short notice, but Kara can take over as soon as she’s able to tear herself away from CatCo. We would owe you big time.”
A quick glance tells her Alex is ready to prepare her an out, but Lena nods at Kelly, smiling to head off the interruption. Her world could have been absolutely imploding – and it may be right at this very moment – but she would never pass up time with her goddaughter.
“That’s fine. I was just finishing up here anyway.” She looks to Esme, curled up with a head on Lena’s shoulder, one arm still wrapped around her stuffy, and big hazel eyes staring up at her. “Why don’t we go back to my apartment and practice some experiments?”
“Yeah! Can we do the bubbly one?” Esme bounces on her hip, nearly dislodging herself from Lena’s arms in her excitement. The three women can’t help but chuckle as Alex places a steadying hand at her back and Lena confirms they can indeed do the bubbly experiment – a simple baking soda and vinegar reaction that Esme loves to watch.
Lena smiles softly at Alex and gives a reassuring bob of her head as Alex steps away, silently communicating that she is okay, and that they will talk soon.
A short time later after Nia and Brainy have arrived to take the night watch at the Tower, Lena’s earlier confusion and panic are forgotten as she joins Esme in the back of her town car, listening to the little girl chattering away about how well she’s been doing training with J’onn to control her powers. Lena congratulates her and enjoys the moments of distraction before she knows her mind will be reeling again as she tries to piece together what exactly led to her current predicament.
Kryptonians and humans are similar when it comes to reproductive biology, so something had to have been amiss. However, as she looks down at her goddaughter, imagining a similar little girl but with big blue eyes and raven curls, the flutter in her abdomen can no longer be denied or refused.
The proof is in the results of five separate tests.
Lena Luthor is six weeks pregnant.
And Kara Danvers aka Supergirl is the other parent.
Later that evening, once volcano experiments have been cleaned up and Esme has been bundled to sleep in the guest room Lena had recently remodeled to include a child’s sized bed and more toys than Esme could ever play with alone, Lena sits at her kitchen island.
She is reviewing her results again, comparing all five rounds of testing to search for any abnormality that could indicate a false positive. Or something more nefarious.
Nothing stands out.
She rubs at her temple to stave off an oncoming headache and with a longing glance to her liquor cabinet, stands to make herself a cup of chamomile tea.
As she starts the kettle, her phone chimes with an incoming notification – a text from Alex.
AD: u good? Kara on SG duty Need me 2 pick squirt up?
Groaning slightly at the text-speak, Lena responds, letting her know that Esme is sleeping and that she can bring her to the Tower in the morning for hand-off. Kelly and Alex deserve a night to enjoy themselves.
The response she receives is a string of heart and praying hands emojis Lena never would have been able to decipher as a “thanks, love you” before her friendship with Kara made her privy to their use.
As if the thought alone summons her best friend, Lena’s attention is pulled to her balcony where Kara is just letting herself in through the glass doors. Waving a hello, she turns and pulls a second mug from her cupboard, dropping in a bag of tea in wait for the kettle to boil.
“Hey,” Kara begins, kicking off her boots by the door and laying her cape over an armchair on her way to the kitchen to absently place a kiss on Lena’s cheek in greeting. She continues, not noticing Lena’s momentary alarm at the show of affection, the way her own cheek had presented itself automatically, and the realization of just how common an occurrence it has become. “Sorry, I got caught up. There was a small fire in the textile district. We were able to get it out quickly though, thank Rao, and nobody was hurt.” She looks around the room. “Did Alex and Kelly already pick up Esme?”
Collecting herself, Lena nods toward the hall. “She’s sleeping. I’ll bring her by the Tower in the morning on my way to the foundation.”
The kettle whistles and Lena goes about filling their mugs while Kara motions down the hall and Lena hears the shower turn on and off in the time it takes their teas to steep. Kara re-emerges just as Lena finishes squeezing a concerning amount of honey into one of the mugs, dressed in an old pair of sweats and a t-shirt from her assigned corner of Lena’s closet.
The sight makes Lena pause as she’s handing Kara her honey-filled mug, thinking about how domestic it is that Kara has dedicated space in Lena’s apartment – an entire corner of the closet is dedicated to an array of casual and business attire with a spare super suit hidden in the back, as well as a drawer of amenities in Lena’s bathroom. She thinks of her own drawer of clothing, hanging business attire, and extra toothbrushes and beauty products that have made their home in Kara’s loft. Considering her current predicament, it is almost enough to make her laugh, or sob, at the ridiculousness of it all.
Kara must catch the fleeting look on Lena’s face because there is a telltale crinkle forming on her brow.
“What’s the matter?”
Lena braces herself before she says, “we should talk. About the wedding?”
Kara is just opening her mouth to respond, looking slightly panicked when a whimper and cry can be heard from down the hall. Before Esme can even utter her pitiful cry for “Aunt Lena” they are entering her room, moved along by a burst of Kara’s super speed.
Lena is at the child’s bedside immediately, pulling Esme into her arms, rocking her, and gently stroking her back, more than used to speeding with Kara by now so as not to be ruffled by it. A wave of nausea flares but she tamps it down quickly. She is murmuring softly as Esme’s cries fade to soft hiccups and then Lena is pulling back to wipe tears from reddened cheeks.
“What is it darling? Did you have a nightmare?”
Esme nods, lower lip protruding in a way that would be adorable if not for the tears her little hand is currently scrubbing from her cheeks.
“The bad man tried to take me and then he tried to take you too and mama and mommy couldn’t get to us, and Aunt Kara was hurt and-”
Lena shushes her, pulling her tiny frame back into her embrace.
“It’s okay, sweetheart. We defeated the bad man, remember?” She glances at Kara, standing sadly in the doorway, gesturing to the space next to them on the bed. “See, you and I are both here and Aunt Kara is just fine. Look.”
Esme looks around just as Kara sits beside them on the bed, opening her arms for the child to slide over to her lap and wrapping her niece in a hug.
“Hey, kiddo.” Kara tickles at Esme’s side, eliciting a morose giggle. “See? We’re all good and the bad man can’t get to us anymore, I promise. If he even tries, me and Aunt Lena will kick his butt again, okay?”
Esme doesn’t seem entirely convinced but accepts the promise for now.
“How about we cuddle up on the couch and watch a movie, huh?” Lena smiles as Esme seems to perk up and Kara wiggles her brows exaggeratedly.
“Oh! Can we watch Encanto?” Kara bounces excitedly, eliciting a more genuine giggle from the girl in her lap.
The trio makes their way to Lena’s den, curling up together, Esme squeezed between them on the couch. It doesn’t take long after the movie has begun, and Esme finishes the hot chocolate flooded with marshmallows that Kara had presented her before Esme is nodding off. By the time Mirabel has learned about Bruno, she is snoring softly, head on Lena’s chest and lower half sprawled across Kara’s lap.
Kara looks across at Lena, smiling gently. She extricates herself from below Esme, standing and bending to lift the little girl into her arms. “I’ll get her back to bed.”
Lena stops her with a hand at her forearm, pulling herself up from the couch. “Put her in bed with us. She won’t want to sleep alone.”
Kara nods and Lena thinks to be alarmed again at the fact she hadn’t even thought to question that the two of them will share a bed. It has been a foregone conclusion whenever one of them has stayed at the other’s apartment for months even preceding Kelly and Alex’s wedding. Even after their non-platonic night together, it is a habit that has remained.
Lena feels a flutter at the sight of Kara effortlessly carrying Esme to her - their - bed. Her hand moves to rest over her midsection as she finds herself imagining what could be, a spike of panic at the thought that Kara may not want the same.
Feeling nausea rise, she takes steadying breaths until it has passed. Stalling, she goes about cleaning up the den, folding their blankets, and taking their mugs to the sink. Kara comes back into the room as she is placing Esme’s small mug into the drying rack, having washed them by hand to delay long enough for her mind and stomach to settle.
“She should be down for the night, but I put her in the middle of our bed.” Kara looks down at her feet, reaching to adjust a pair of glasses she isn’t wearing – an old holdover of a nervous tick from before she was fully herself. “I know we need to talk, but maybe not tonight?”
Lena sighs, accepting Kara’s deferral for the moment. She isn’t sure she’s quite ready to discuss what they need to right now herself.
“Alright, but soon? Please. This is important.”
Kara nods eagerly, seemingly happy to have avoided the topic for another night. She reaches a hand to take Lena’s, leading her down the hall and turning lights off as they go.
“Of course. But for now, let’s get some sleep.”
Lena follows without protest, curling up into her bed, linking her hand with Kara’s above Esme’s small chest, not even pausing this time at the practiced intimacy of it all. Soon, she is asleep and for now, the chaos is quieted.