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Xie lian sat on the floor of one of Hua Chengs many offices in paradise manor. Hua Cheng was currently at the gamblers den most likely betting with ghosts or human. And most likely winning.
Earlier, when Hua Cheng left, Xie lian decided to surprise his husband with a clean office. However, going through the drawers and tucked under a series of many different papers sat a small box.
Curious, looking into the box it contained many different letters. At first Xie lian assumed that they were written to Hua Cheng, however that was quickly debunked as on the back of each letter was his name and a date.
Seeing his name made him question if maybe they were written from an outside party and Hua Cheng didn't want him to know about them. But that didn't seem like something his husband would do. So he decided to, carefully, open up the letter on top of the pile.
The date was from at almost 500 years ago. 'Why would someone write a letter to me all those years ago. Nobody even remembered who I was back then, and even if they did they probably hated me.'
The handwriting was barely legible but if seen enough times it was obvious whose it was. It was Hua Chengs.
"To my dearest gege,
From the moment I saw you I new that you would be the only one for me. Looking in your eyes I saw my future and the man I would devote my entire existence to.
As you looked down onto me I felt my heart pound inside my chest and I was stunned my on just how utterly gorgeous you are. Not enough words in the entire universe could describe the love i feel for you. Sculptures and painting done by this lowly one could never compare to the beauty of you, my beloved.
I long to feel your eyes on me once more. I long to feel you close to me. I long to run my fingers through your hair. I long to hold you in my arms. I long to press my lips on yours. I long to tell you just how much I adore you and everything about you. I long to just be with you.
However, I know that you could never view me that way.
Even though, I will continue to long for your presence next to me and will continue to love you in silence.
With most love and admiration,
Your forever most devoted believer"
'W-what?' Xie lian thought to himself, 'San Lang wrote these. But why, why would he write this. I didn't even know who I was back then. So why?' The fact that it was a love letter made the matter even stranger.
I mean he knew Hua Cheng has loved him for years but he never thought that he would write love letters to him?!
Still in shock from what he just he read he set down the note and picked up the one underneath it.
The date was from a couple hundred years ago. Written later than the previous letter.
"To my love,
Writing these letters to you feels therapeutic in a way. Writing down my feelings towards you makes me feel so happy, almost like I'm confessing my undying love to you. Even though I know you will never see these letters.
I wish that I could tell you these feelings that have been growing inside of me day by day for years. I've wanted you for so long it hurts. I know it's selfish to want to find you and keep you in my arms for the rest of eternity, but I just love you. I love everything about you. I love your smile, your hair, your face, your kindness, your patience, and just you.
I love loving you
I wish I could smother you in these feelings. I want you to know that there's still someone in this world who loves you more than they could even begin to comprehend. So as long as my undead body roams this world, just know that there will always be someone who will love you no matter what.
Sincerely,
The man who loves you more than anything"
At this point reading the letters was making Xie lians eyes water.
Even hearing Hua Cheng tell him he loved him was sometimes too much. Knowing that his husband held him so dearly made his heart feel so full.
But knowing that Hua Cheng had really always loved him.
It made him want to cry.
On the verge of tears he picked up the next letter in the box.
It was written the day he ascended for the third time.
"To my universe,
Laying here in the grass feels so serene and peaceful, but so lonely and sad at the same time.
I wish more than anything that you could be here with me right now. Laying next to me in the soft grass while I confess to you the hundreds of years of pent up love that I so wish to share with you.
I know I am undeserving of your love and affection but I wish to dream. I want to dream of holding you tightly. I want to dream of whispering sweet nothings to you. I want to dream of kissing you all over. And most of all I want to dream of this unrequited love being returned.
Unfortunately, dreams are just dreams. And not all dreams come true. But I seek for your blessing to continue dreaming, in hopes that maybe you could love this lowly one some day.
Loving you in the background,
Your most loyal servant"
Xie lian pressed the letter close to his chest and started to sob.
He just loved his husband. He loved him so much.
He read the letters a millions times over never feeling so loved.
He was too distracted reading and crying that he didn't even hear the creaking of the door open.
"Gege?! Are you okay, why are you crying," Hua Cheng rushed to Xie lians side and pulled him close to his chest, "what happened my love?"
Hua Cheng pressed his lips onto Xie lians head and ran his fingers through his hair as Xie lian continued to cry into his chest.
Xie lian wrapped him arms around Hua Chengs waist and raised his head enough to whisper in his husband's ear.
"I love you so much. I really do. I hope you know that."
Surprised by his husband's words Hua Cheng looked down into his husbands lap and there he saw a letter. One of the many letters that he a wrote to him all those years ago.
"Where did you find that?" Hua Cheng inquired. His voice was low and breathy. He sounded almost angry, " I thought I hid those."
"I'm sorry San Lang, I was cleaning your office and found these in a box. I shouldn't have looked, I'm sorry."
"No, no gege I'm not mad at you. I just- I just never thought that you would find these," he sounded ashamed of himself, "I tried to hide these from you because I thought that you would think it was strange. I mean, you didn't even know who I was and I was writing love letters to you."
"San Lang I love you. I always will. I love these letters, being able to read these makes me so happy that you love me. Thank you San Lang."
Still tucked safely into his husband's arms he pressed his lips onto his husband's cheek and snuggled into his beloved face.