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Chapter Text

Key in an old rusty padlock turned[a] with difficulty twice, Wang Yibo opened a grid and then — a door of their store ''Tools at Billy's''. Fast, almost automatically shut the alarm, turned on the lights in the space, one of the lamps flashed right away and he sighed sleepily: Monday, hello working life.
Wang Yibo* was American of chinese descent, his parents immigrated to America when he was like three years old.
He didn't really remember China, only by smell. All that he remembered — the distinct thick mixed smell and the motley colors. That's what remained in his memory about his distant homeland, whence he moved in early childhood with his family.
Wang Yibo was twenty, he worked as a salesman in a hardware store (''everything for life and repairs''), and of course he lived apart from his parents.
In general, the biggest ethnic Chinese settlements are located in almost all big cities of the US, mostly in California and New York, therefore it was really surprising why the hell he stuck in this shit-hole named Anthony, Doña Ana county, the state of New Mexico. And even worked there... as a salesman in a hardware store. It didn't resemble a ladder to the American dream at all. Actually... it just so happened. Life sometimes sets the rules.
In fact, when they moved from China to the US they lived in Chicago at the beginning. Wang Yibo finished school there, in that wonderful big city were a lot of his friends who sprinkled then across the country when they entered college who where and Wang Yibo wanted to be... a policeman, therefore he applied for studies right away after finishing school but got just no answer in the first year. It was OK, actually: thousands of people of various ages rush into the Police Academy annually and some of them have to wait for several years till they just get invited to the primary selection by physical training.
By the way, Wang Yibo had no problems with it: he was keen on everything related to action. Six pack abs adorned his stomach and the guy always maintained his physical shape going to the gym or jogging.
First when he didn't get the answer from the Police Academy he didn't get frustrated. At that moment his father got a tempting position at White Sands Range, that is how they moved to New Mexico.
In fact, Wang Yibo could have stayed in Chicago, he was already of a legal age, but he decided to help his parents with relocation and, indeed, he didn't care where to wait for the next recruitment in the ranks of brave policemen.
His parents settled in nearby Chaparral that was a short step to the range but he was able to find a job only in Anthony. Fortunately, while moving Wang Yibo had met quite by chance one more chinese, Li Wenhan, who had been also moving to Anthony and looking for housing. They decided then to team up, just on the basis of their ethnic origin, and found together a small but cozy two-room apartment.
That is how he settled in this miserable shit-hole and regretted it in two months.
At first, the town was really boring. Even for the most simple entertainments like cinema you had to go to neighboring Las Cruces or El Paso. Then, if not taking into account his flatmate, there were no Asians at all. It's not like he was attracted only to ''his'' origin, no, Wang Yibo considered himself American and was completely relaxed among people of different races, it wasn't really the point, the point was that... that he liked precisely the asian beauty and he always fell for the representatives of his race. Whoever likes it: someone gets off on ginger and white, someone on hot mulatto, someone on big and black but Wang Yibo beat off only to asian porn and even since school had picked out from the crowd small tight butts of asian... boys. Yes, Wang Yibo was gay.
It's not like he yelled about it at every corner. He dressed simply, didn't wear makeup, didn't take part in any gay parades and was a quiet, humble dominant indeed. But he also didn't conceal his orientation. When some pretty girl came up to get to know him, he would tell her honestly right away that sorry babe but I play in another league.[c]
He had known that about himself since he was a child and had never dramatized it. He fell in love firstly at school, with his PE teacher, of course, unrequitedly. He confessed to his parents when he was 14 and they handled that calmly, friends as well, they even helped him along with his first «going out», so to speak, if you can call his first visit to the gay club when he was 18 like that. He had kissed different guys several times, as a rule when he was completely drunk, some guys blew him in the club restroom three times, three times he was about to lose his virginity but each time the event got disrupted. With his first guy — because none of them had condoms, with the second one — because his mother came home at the most wrong time and the third guy was drunk as hell so he fell asleep at the stage of prelude so Yibo decided that to fuck the semi-corpse was not for him.
He didn't expect that himself but it turned out that to lose virginity even at our time was quite a problem. And for him it was altogether a real damn special operation. So when he moved to Anthony and realized what kind of ass he got into (haha life sometimes was so ironic), Wang Yibo had to accept the fact that his love life was postponed until better times.
According to Wikipedia 0.1% of the citizenry of Anthony consists of Asians, and Wang Yibo was sure in all seriousness that this 0.1% were exactly Wenhan and him because he had seen no Asians there at all! Not in the streets, not in the shops, just nowhere!
Oh yeah, Wenhan, it's worth talking about him as well. Unfortunately, his neighbor was the straightest straight in the world, so much so that he constantly brought girls to their place on Wednesdays, Fridays and Saturdays. Wang Yibo had already lost count of how many times he couldn't have fallen asleep because of distinctive moans behind the wall. Of course, Wenhan knew about his orientation. You discuss such kinds of things when you're going to live under one roof. But his neighbor wasn't attracted to boys at all, especially with a job like his. He was a bartender in a semi-legal strip club, just like in the movie ''From Dusk Till Dawn'', Yibo teased him on the topic of vampirism and all that very often. Fortunately, Wenhan wasn't afflicted by homophobia, all the more Yibo was almost an ideal quiet neighbor, not causing any problems and didn't bring anyone to their place.
Wang Yibo honestly tried to get interested in someone. For example, he had a pleasant acquaintance with one latin american boy who was pretty good but... but it didn't go any further than drinking beer. Didn't reach further from his side, the boy himself wasn't against. But him... he came back home, watched asian series and listened to K-pop, imagining Kim Tae Hyung from BTS in his wet dreams.
In short, he didn’t leave Anthony but only because of his parents. His mother was really glad that her son was nearby, he visited her twice a month at the weekends, his father worked a lot as usual and his mother had always been a housewife therefore her first year in Chaparral, till she found some acquaintances, had bored her a lot.
Yibo found a job at the hardware store ''Tools at Billy's'' at the schedule five in two and got into a small but not really bad team.
The owner of the store was a Mexican Pablo, a married man over 45 with a belly and a lot of anecdotes about his youth. Wang Yibo didn't know if Pablo suspected anything about his orientation, they didn't discuss it but it was him who always tried to sneak him into some ''worthy girl''. At times Wang Yibo didn't really know where to get to from his compassionate joker-boss.
Pablo had a wife, Mrs. Cruz, in combination — an accountant of their store who loved Wang Yibo so much and always treated him with the most delicious chili tacos.
And it was Old Sam in their staff — a unique person who was in charge of... everything. Initially the store belonged to the father of Old Sam (Billy) and then to him. But at the beginning of zero Sam (he wasn't so old at that time) got into something. He disappeared for two years, closed the store. Rumor had it that he either went to war (there were clashes in Afghanistan just in time) or served in prison. Anyway Sam got back as a completely different person at the end: quiet, reserved and somehow... burned out or something. Like all that was left for him was to live out his days. Sam was broke so he sold the store of his father to Pablo and worked there himself as a seller-cashier at the weekends, went as a substitute or helped with goods reception, sometimes he was a guard and, all in all, you could always rely on Sam.
In such a company Yibo had been working for seven months waiting for another opportunity to apply to the Police Academy again. He did it and miraculously! — got invited to physical training already from the second attempt.
The guy was completely happy and showed a great result, got to know trainers and teachers-officers but then... got sick with a temperature and didn't come to the preparation for writing and speaking exam.
He didn't know what kind of a trick from his body it was, Yibo had always been distinguished by good health and did sports really a lot. He might have gone too nervous, who knows, maybe, he was too sweaty after physical training and got under a draft but he had a high temperature the next morning, right up to delirium dreams and, obviously, his candidacy was removed from consideration because of his absence.
After recovering the boy went to them again and begged to give him another chance but got told at the commision:
''Guy, you'll try again next year, don't worry.''
And here he goes again in New Mexico, Doña Ana county, the town of Anthony, begins his work week at the hardware store (everything for repairs and life), ''Tools at Billy's''.
Maybe, my life got the wrong way, he thought that morning, seriously intending to visit his parents at Chaparral next weekend and to claim that he was leaving for Chicago. Or set off to New York or better to California.
Wang Yibo sincerely felt miserable not knowing yet that on that Monday his life would change entirely.

Their shop was attended not only by the whole Anthony but neighboring Chaparral as well. The range was really wide and varied: everything beginning with a toilet brush and ending up with a small assortment of wallpaper and tiles. Therefore their store was in demand. Surely no lines like at McDonald's at lunch break but there were one-two dozens of visitors a day that never let him get specifically bored.
Wang Yibo knew the biggest part of the visitors: there were some craftsmen, working for themselves, or construction supervisors of small building sites nearby who ordered some materials in bulk through them, less often — private customers buying something to their houses. All in all Wang Yibo didn't really get bored, he always had something to do, but if the day was peopleless, he turned on the radio or an old TV. They didn't have a good signal so he only played on his phone putting his feet on the lower counter. Pablo never got mad at him because Wang Yibo was a good worker in the end: conscientious, reliable, not stupid. He let him play calmly when there were no people and didn't stuck there himself but visited the store two-three times a week.
Wang Yibo himself was satisfied with such a kind of freedom, a boss who didn't breathe down his neck and the fact that he got his salary right on time and, of course, heavenly good tacos from Mrs. Cruz.
That Monday was supposed to be calm, measured and not intense. The only intensive thing was a flashing lamp that Yibo hated so much. But the thing was not in the lamp itself but in the old wires, so it was impossible to fix the defect. He could drag that lamp hell out but Pablo was against it. Fortunately it was flashing in the corner and Wang Yibo could just not pay attention to it.
When someone came in, the bell rang at the entrance door so the guy could simply get stuck into his phone when the store was empty.
So that time he was passing the 329 level of Hay Day when the bell rang and fell silent. Yibo didn't get distracted right away but he had to at the end. He lifted his head and... got stunned.
An asian guy was approaching his counter and not just any but a real beauty!
Gentle face features, high cheekbones, big eyes in spite of their almond shape, neat haircut and a mole under a lower lip. And his tall stature, slim body and such unreal incredible legs, wrapped in tight blue jeans. Wang Yibo gasped and got up from his place, watching as in slow-mo, how this beauty was coming up to him.
''Hi!'' he said automatically first. ''Welcome to ''Instruments at Billy's''.
''Hello!'' that boy answered and smiled, and Wang Yibo thought he would faint either from the heat or that disarming smile. His Didi (as called his dick fondly to himself) made a move with interest towards such a smile and it ached under Yibo's heart: a guy like that should be straight for sure. Life is woven out of pieces of injustice.
The guy aligned with the counter, opened his chest pocket with a neat movement, took out from there a piece of paper that turned out to be a list of necessary things for him and read out:
''I need three items of construction tape, six packs of double-A batteries, a coil of a rope, braces for construction stapler and a roll of plastic packaging.''
And then look expectantly at Yibo and Yibo was looking at him and thinking: who? Chinese or korean? More of a chinese but of course he didn't really care already. It was exactly the guy from his dreams, you understand it right away, more judging by the reaction of your body: when you want to bring down and fuck and also close the store and do not let him out till you know everything about his life and what a person he is. Specifically these two desires got over Wang Yibo at the second when the customer frowned a bit and glanced at his name tag:
''Mr... erm Yibo, do you have what I need?''
Wang Yibo collected himself and almost jumped, somehow immediately hurried and shyly asked, coming out from the counter:
''Construction tape, batteries... Remind, please, what else do you need?''
''A coil of rope'' answered a guy, following him across the store.
Yibo picked everything that the beauty voiced him over and brought that to the counter. He made it mechanically fast, telling himself off in his mind: why so fast? Because it meant that the beauty would leave sooner.
At the moment he was wrapping the roll of plastic packaging with a tape so it would be easier to carry, Wang Yibo realized that the customer was most likely chinese. Because he had pronounced his name exactly right.
As a rule, after immigration Asians took ''English names''. His mother, for example, introduced herself as Linda while her chinese name was Lin Zi. Wang Yibo was against it. He was exactly Wang Yibo, period. The guy wasn't going to become some Bob Wang or someone else, therefore in his name tag was written ''Yibo'' and a lot of Americans pronounced his name like ''Iebo'' with different stresses but this one made it right with the first attempt.
Curiosity if this guy who came to the store was chinese or not and who was also beautiful as a heavenly angel exited the boy but he wasn't resolved to ask directly. Having collected all the purchases of the customer, Yibo counted:
"That'll be two hundred and sixty-three dollars".
''Cash'' answered him and reached into his chest pocket.
Only then Wang Yibo noticed what he was dressed like: ordinary all in all, generally modest but... hm... For example, in spite of the heat, he was wearing a long-sleeved shirt buttoned up to the neck. Wasn't he afraid of a heat stroke with such a style? And he took out his money from a side chest pocket and not from the wallet that everyone usually had in their trouser pocket. Hm, strange but interesting, Wang Yibo wasn't confused by it.
The guy pay and got change and then suddenly asked him first:
''I also need to order a mirror from Ebay, do you pick orders from pick-up points?''
''Yeah, once a week we go to Las Cruces for that. If you make order today, I'll pick it up for you this Thursday.''
The guy smiled again and Wang Yibo bit his lip from the inside to keep the face and look professional at least a bit.
''Good! So I'll be able to get it this Thursday evening?''
''Yes, let's order now if you want. Do you have a part number?''
The guy nodded and they looked into Yibo's phone. The signal was bad and slow, that didn't upset Yibo at all: all that time they were staying close to each other, leaning over his smartphone, waiting, so Yibo was able to smell shampoo that guy washed his hair with. His hair smelled with herbs and a little pine. Not a typical choice of shampoo but it seemed that Yibo liked everything about the guy. OK a little more and he would start to flirt with him, he should just have the courage.
Finally, they opened an internet-store and found the necessary mirror. Yibo ordered it under his name, indicating self-delivery from the point in Las Cruces, the guy made a full advance payment plus commision, Yibo gave him a receipt and only then realized that it was a good chance to learn the name of the stranger and if he was chinese or not:
''Who'll take the order? You?''
''Yes'' he nodded.
''Can I get your name?''
''Xiao Zhan'' answered the beauty and Yibo's heart thrived: chinese! Mother of God it was a freaking fate!
Please, be gay, thinks Yibo, writing down his name in the receipt. Or, at least, bisexual. Or, at least, latently-undecided, I'll be okay with any option, but he asks aloud:
''Give me your contacts, please, just in case.''
But the guy kept silent. Yibo lifted his eyes on him and he shrugged shyly a bit but playfully:
''I don't have a phone. I'll just come over on Thursday after 4pm. Thanks a lot.''
He took packets with his purchases, stuck a plastic packaging under the armpit and went out, pushing the door with his hip.
Wang Yibo was watching him hinderedly, understanding that he should catch up on him after all and tell him something else to make him understand he was interesting to Yibo. Maybe, to hint somehow or touch by accident but the ring of the bell told him that the guy had already left the store.
Wang Yibo swore and chased him but had to watch his pickup leaving the parking lot.
That's it, and he couldn't get anything else done. But anyway, he already knew when he would be able to see the guy of his dreams again. And now he knew that Xiao Zhan existed and that was the most important.

Chapter Text

After that Monday Wang Yibo got incredibly excited. He really wanted to see Xiao Zhan again and to get a chance to talk to him more. The upcoming meeting occupied all his mind. Therefore Tuesday and Wednesday dragged on for so awfully long. He got ready to work like for a holiday on Thursday morning, heaving worn his brand new shirt, spent much time on his hair in front of a mirror, used his body spray several times and, just in case, brushed his teeth twice.
Old Sam had to go to Las Cruces to pick up the orders and Wang Yibo was giving him instructions:
''Go to Ebay point first! You must pick up the mirror and bring it to me, okay? Will you manage it till 4pm? You have to be right on time. Even if you linger, you must pick up the mirror, okay?''
Old Sam was smoking, keeping silent and looking at him with an understanding but tired glance, then he just nodded and went away and Wang Yibo stayed there to nervously wait for Xiao Zhan.
Even though he knew Xiao Zhan would appear only in the evening, after 4pm, and that Sam would be right in time for sure and the beauty-chinese wouldn’t come earlier, he still twitched every time the bell rang and someone came in.
Then just for a moment Yibo suddenly imagined that Sam would be late. For example, his old dodge stalled in the middle of the desert. He imagined how Xiao Zhan would come and they would be waiting for Sam till the evening. They might have coffee, order local pizza to kill the time and surely get to know each other better, they would talk a lot and Xiao Zhan would turn out to be a cool, cute and kind guy, of course. And when the mirror would come they wouldn’t need it anymore ‘cause they like would already have something greater...
Old Sam came back and Yibo helped him to carry all the orders to the utility room. The time was exactly 4pm, the guy was waiting for Xiao Zhan any minute but he didn’t come that day at the end, and the next day as well.
Surely anything could have happened. Wang Yibo told it constantly to himself and his imagination helpfully provided him with different plots, starting from where the boy of his dreams was lying in the pit with a cracked head and that’s why he hadn’t been able to come to pick up his order, ending up with that... that he just didn’t care. He didn’t really need the mirror and their meeting didn’t impress Xiao Zhan and all in all he could be the straightest straight like Wenhan and Yibo had nothing to catch.
With such miserable thoughts, generally, in complete frustration the guy finally went to his parents at Chaparral at the weekend.

His father, despite working at the range, wasn't a military man. He was a physicist. And he held tightly to his place. Yibo saw how the financial welfare of his parents had improved since his father took over that position. Unfortunately, the other side of this work was a fact that they had to live in such backwoods. But the father was happy and worked hard, his mother complained only about the boredom and only for the first time. Then she joined some on-line book club, signed up for flamenco dance classes in El Paso and, when Yibo visited them that weekend, she was the first who offered him to move:
''Well, why are you stuck in this dump? Anthony is a place for seniors. Go away for some big city, live there, what keeps you here?''
For real, what? At first it was you, mom, and now... Yibo sighed. A week ago he would have even been happy that he had such an understanding mother who you didn’t have to explain anything to, he would have kissed her farewell, would have shaken father’s hand, negotiated with Pablo and Wenhan, left the place in a week and this damn town would have never seen him again. But now…
He chuckled, understanding that now deep within his heart there was a hook and he got caught. Gosh, what a foolishness! That was just a fleeting, meaningless encounter! Ten minutes conversation, twenty? Couple of smiles and the smell of pine shampoo — that’s all that they had but he was mumbling there like a fool, hemming, not knowing how to explain to his mother why he wasn’t yet packing his suitcase:
''There’s no one to replace me at the store, mom'' he said but it’s weak, his mom hit it back like an experienced batter.
''You told us that you always have Old Sam to replace you and Pablo does the bare minimum there, let him stay behind the counter and stop exploiting my son!''
''Nobody exploits me, mom, I get paid for that!'' Yibo smiled but considered for himself that if he didn’t meet Xiao Zhan next week so he wouldn’t cling to that fleeting encounter and would ask Pablo to give him a check. He only degraded in Anthony.

Having come back to work next Monday, Wang Yibo found a note from Sam, carefully taped to the cash register. When Sam passed him the work, he always left some important notes, for example: someone came, left some order or that there was a leaky faucet in the restroom again and so on.
It was so cute and old-fashioned. Yibo had tried to teach him to use chats but he still had that push-button phone, however he didn’t even use SMS, preferring good old writing by hand.
This time Old Sam wrote the balance on cash register, that they got at the and of the shift, about orders and: ''some guy came for the mirror and asked about you''. Yibo’s heart skipped a beat when he read that. He dialed Old Sam right away, who picked up the phone reluctantly, Yibo might have woken him up.
''Sam, the mirror was picked up at the weekend? Who did it? Guy named Xiao Zhan?''
''How do I know?'' Sam grumbled in displeasure. ''He showed me the check and the part number. It was enough.''
''Was it a tall Chinese?''
''How do I know?''
''Tall Asian, slim, with a mole under the lip?''
''Well, it might be him...''
Yibo got really nervous, he was walking around the store back and forth, almost begged into the phone:
''Sam, please, walk me through how it was! What was he asking? What was he saying at all?''
Heavy and long sigh. Wang Yibo bit his lip because he intuitively felt that he shouldn’t hurry Sam up. Calm down, Wang Yibo, you’re a patient boy.
''He went for the mirror and picked it up'' answered Sam. ''And then he asked why you weren’t working that day.''
''And you? What about you? What did you tell him?!''
''Told him that you work only on weekdays, sure, what else?''
''And him? What about him?''
''Nothing. Nodded, thanked and went away.''
Wang Yibo felt disappointment mixed with some vague happiness. It could mean nothing, for real. Xiao Zhan could have shown interest just to fill the spot while Sam was bothered with the receipt, but... but it just seemed to Yibo that it wasn’t that easy and that guy had expected to see him behind the counter. Or did Wang Yibo just wanted it like that?

He spent that Monday doubting and thinking, Tuesday wasn’t very eventful as well but Wednesday became special for him. In all senses.
It was so crowded on Wednesday: first, it was the beginning of the month, people just got their salary and went shopping. Then, they got a huge shipment of different stuff that was always required: latches, hooks, nails, screws, various chemical washing detergents and car accessories - in general, it was a really crowded day. Local mechanic, several drivers and a couple of housewives came somehow simultaneously, they crowded at the cash desk and asked Yibo about every detail and he was running around the store, not knowing whom he should rush to first.
Good thing Sam came to support and was sitting at the exit, watching other people not to steal anything on the sly.
And among all that fuss and constant ''Iebo'' from all angles he saw a beautiful asian coming in and the guy’s heart jumped and galloped away. Yibo left the customers and ran to the utility room to glance at the mirror. Then he came back to the cash register, making eye contact with Xiao Zhan:
''Hello'' smiled him and it seemed to Yibo that he was literally melting inside from that smile. How’s that possible?
''Hi'' Yibo smiled somehow silly and, damn, it was unreal to look away from his eyes. ''Today also according to the list?''
''Yes'' he reached into his jeans because there was no pocket on his old-fashioned shirt this time. ''Have you got corners? I’ll take three-inch ones...''
''Young man!'' bellowed some housewife beside him. ''I stood here before you!''
A wave of Spanish shame came into Yibo’s face, he glanced at Xiao Zhan but that just shyly stepped aside to let the loud lady go ahead and she dumped a bunch of some cleaning chemicals, rags and sponges on Yibo’s counter. While he was checking out all that stuff, Xiao Zhan was standing nearby, keeping his head down and hiding a conspiratorial smile. Wang Yibo clearly saw it and first smiled himself but then got drawn to some crazy laughter.
''That'll be fifty-six dollars and thirty cents'' he told the customer, suppressing the emerging tremor of laughter within.
Xiao Zhan behind her back also tried to hold on as much as he could but as soon as the lady went away both chuckled and burst out laughing. They could hardly explain the reason for their laughter. Just embarrassment multiplied to the joy of meeting raised to the power, something like that?
''Why didn’t you come on Thursday?'' asked Yibo in a low voice.
''Sorry, I wasn’t able to. Thought you would be here on Sunday...''
''No, I relax on Sundays. Well... do you... need three-inch corners?''
Xiao Zhan nodded and Yibo took out some from the shelf behind himself:
''One pack?''
Xiao Zhan was paying in cash again and Yibo was thinking how to hit on him, what to think up and say to understand at least if he was moving in the right direction…
Xiao Zhan picked up his purchase, nodded to him and, after hesitating a bit, moved to the exit. Yibo got worried. He understood that if this guy went away again he didn’t know when they would meet next and it would be so stupid, so fool — to loose him once more.
''Sam, get behind the counter, give me one second!'' he dropped to his colleague, sneaking past him and running from the shop chasing a guy of his dreams. ''Xiao Zhan, hold on!''
The guy turned to him and freezed. In one hand he was holding car keys, in another — bag with corners, and all that seemed so absurd to Yibo, especially his next words:
''You... do you have a minute?''
Xiao Zhan nodded and smiled and it gave Yibo a little courage:
''Do you live in Anthony or in Chaparral? I just... I’m relatively new here and... don’t even know where to go and hang out. Do you know... any interesting places?''
It seemed to him he was saying nonsense. ''Interesting places'' in Chaparral, God, just to anyone who was there even for ten minutes it was clear that there were none and Xiao Zhan looked at him a little bit confused:
''Um... The thing is that I live neither in Anthony nor Chaparral so... I don’t know any interesting places myself.''
It confused Yibo a bit: so where does he live? In Las Cruces? In El Paso? It was illogical, why then did he come to buy housewares in their small town? Maybe, he lived right at the range?
''Well, I guess there was somewhere to go in El Paso...'' Yibo put out feelers at random. Xiao Zhan just shrugged his shoulders in uncertainty.
''It might be... I rarely appear there.''
It was opportunity to grab the chance and Yibo took a risk:
''So why don’t we go to El Paso this weekend, watch the city? I wouldn’t mind the company, what do you think?''
Xiao Zhan was looking at him and it was hard to tell from the guy’s face what he was thinking about. A slight crease appeared between his eyebrows and that almost made Yibo go insane with anxiety in a matter of seconds until he finally answered:
''I don’t think I’ll be able to go out this weekend'' Yibo’s heart fell down. Well, well, well... But Xiao Zhan suddenly offered:
''Maybe, Friday?''
If they were in anime now he would fly up. Wang Yibo almost choked from all that joy, not being able to hold back a spreading smile.
''This Friday? Great... That’s cool. Yeah, cool, let’s meet this Friday! In El Paso, then? Let’s see the city and stuff?''
Xiao Zhan nodded:
''I’ll be free almost the whole day, will be able to get to the store to the end of your working day and pick you up.''
It was so dizzying, almost incredible, Yibo got nervous somehow and started to speak confusedly:
''If you... if your day is free so I will free mine as well! I mean, I can make it free, to be exact, ask Sam, Sam will replace me...''
A slight crease between the eyebrows again:
''Won’t it cause problems?''
''That’s okay!'' Yibo reassured ardently. ''We can swap shifts! I’ll work it off next Saturday or Sunday.''
Xiao Zhan nodded and smiled:
''Good. Then... we’ll meet here? Let’s say at 2pm?''
''Let me call you!'' Yibo catches himself here. ''Sure... you don’t have a phone... What happened to it? Broke?''
Xiao Zhan pursed his lips a bit, Yibo saw that he didn’t really want to tell, and was answering, choosing words:
''N-no... I don’t really need it, so... Well, I don’t use it.''
Wang Yibo is confused: who doesn’t need a phone in our time? It was strange, but he would think about it surely next time:
''Well, then... here, next Friday, at 2pm?''
He nodded, smiled:
''Yes. So... Bye?''
''Buy, see you on Friday.''

As a rule, women understand right away if men fall for them or not. Only cold-blooded chaebols in dramas can keep their poker faces throughout sixteen episodes and all normal people can’t suppress non-verbal signals that their organism sends: flashing eyes, involuntary smile, dilating pupils, reddened lips. We get these signals and understand: we’re liked.
Gays do the same, in general. Wang Yibo couldn’t explain himself how he understood who was gay and who wasn’t. Some of them didn’t hide in the closet, of course, and some - demostrated themselves openly[f], but even among those who hid, Wang Yibo with his intuition could accurately identify a ''concerned'' one, so to speak.
For instance, some man comes up to his counter accompanied by his wife.
''Hello'' Yibo tells him, making eye contact. And if the man doesn’t look down or doesn’t avert his eyes and smiles only or even nods a bit, saying:
''Hello'' so Wang Yibo understands that he doesn’t mind getting freaky with him in a utility room.
With Xiao Zhan it was... vague.
Although he accepted all those smiles and glances Yibo sent him at the same time he didn’t flirt back as if…
As if he understood I was gay but didn’t care. Or he understood that I was gay and he was gay himself but I didn’t attract him in sexual terms. Or if he didn’t understand damn hints at all. He was strange actually. Strange but, fuck, so beautyful and sexy! His balls even twitched a bit when he remembered his smile.
He was waiting for Friday in great excitement, knowing that they wouldn’t certainly have anything. They would hang around El Paso, maybe, have beer together and get to know each other a little more, talk, actually, about nothing special and it wouldn’t necessarily turn into something.
''You have to get ready for some easy friendly communication'' he told himself but had brought a breath freshener anyway and had worn clean underwear when he was heading to his store on his own weekend.
Old Sam, who had agreed to swap shifts with him, was there and nodded silently when Yibo came inside out of boredom.
In fact, he had already been to El Paso and had familiarized himself with all local landmarks in his first month in Anthony. He knew all of them by heart: a cable car and a hiking trail to the observation deck on Mount Franklin with an archaeological museum, historical museum and local history museum, a zoo, a theater and... that’s all. For the first run-in with the city it wasn’t a bad choice but Yibo had already been at all those places, probably not in the theater, and he didn’t really want to get back to any of them. However... for the sake of Zhan he would go through all of the points again and, maybe, not just once.
Yibo came a little earlier and was nervous, walking around the store back and forth under the heavy gaze of Old Sam. The guy glanced at the window and bit his lips, adjusted something on the shelves automatically but he heard the car, driving up to the parking lot, in advance and ran outside happily.
Xiao Zhan was in his blue jeans, white undershirt and unbuttoned checked shirt on top. Far more informal that he had seen him two times before. Yibo smiled and watched how he parked, went out from his pickup truck and came towards him, looking at him a bit shyly:
''Hello, Yibo.''
''Hi. You good?''
''I am okay'' Zhan stopped a meter away from him, they looked at each other and chuckled a little.
''By yours or mine?'' Yibo asked about cars.
''Let’s go'' Xiao Zhan nodded at his used Ford. Yibo nodded back, even opened a front passenger door for him while sitting at the steering wheel.
Xiao Zhan, a guy of his dreams, was sitting in his car, near, and they’re going on a date together. The date, damn it, whatever it was going to be, like a friend date or not.
Yibo turned on the ignition and, along with it, music. He already liked that day.

Chapter Text

Xiao Zhan was a concise guy and Wang Yibo understood that quickly. He understood quickly as well that the one wasn’t going to give him a presentation, telling about himself and his life. So if Wang Yibo wanted to know something about him then he’d better ask.
‘Are you gay? - was the main question that concerned him at the moment, his childhood, career and future plans they could discuss sometime later.
But Yibo was afraid to make such a direct move, he wasn’t self-confident.
Okay, the hell with it. Actually, they could start a conversation with anything, they didn’t know a thing about each other after all. Then Yibo cleared his throat and asked:
''What do you think about the song?'' there was some Mexican rap in the car salon. ''Do you like it? Should I turn it up?''
Xiao Zhan smiled sweetly (as Wang Yibo had noticed, sweet smile - was his first reaction to everything), answered:
''I don’t normally listen to such music... But if you like, keep it. In any case it doesn't... annoy me.''
Yibo glanced at him, not really getting distracted from the road.
''And what do you like?''
''I grew up on classics,'' said Xiao Zhan. He also looked at the road in front of him. ''And I listen to it most of all. And just... just like instrumental music.''
So this is it, thought Yibo, maybe, that’s what this is really about. Zhan looked like a son of some ultraconservative intelligents. Might he have been raised in a strict family? That’s where was such an... otherness from?
''What’s your job?'' asked Yibo, turning the music down, anyway.
A smile again but wider this time. Each word was chosen precisely:
''I... coach the children’s choir.''
''What?'' Yibo blurted out. He didn’t expect something like that at all.
''That’s like... choirmaster, a singing teacher'' he smiled, his cheeks blushed in embarrassment.
''Wow... That’s... cool? Do you get on well with kids?''
''I do'' Wang Yibo saw that the topic was pleasing to him, it seemed like he blossomed while telling. ''I have a boy’s choir, twenty-four people, well-chosen voices. We even perform sometimes, not really often but we’re constantly improving!''
Yibo smiled. He liked that Zhan started to relax next to him. Then he in turn told him:
''Well, I am, as you know, a salesman in a hardware store! Have lived in Anthony for about a year...''
Xiao Zhan looked at him:
''Have you always wanted to work in a store?''
''Jeez, of course not!'' Yibo chuckled. ''Who dreams of that? Unless it is your own business! I wanna be a policeman. It hasn't happened yet but I’ll keep trying.''
''Wow!'' Xiao Zhan pulled softly. ''That’s great.''
Yibo caught his glimpse and his heart sank: what was that, something like a flirt on his part? Coquetry? Or did he just get a pure, bright and unspoiled person?
They guy chuckled: that never happens.

They entered the city. El Paso was quite big but small at the same time. It spread out in breadth, uncontainable, but didn’t grow in buildings more than four or five floors.
''Welcome to Texas'' mumbled Yibo, dodging through the streets. ''Well, where do you wanna go? We have to leave the car somewhere. Are you hungry?''
Xiao Zhan shrugged his shoulders in uncertainty, therefore Yibo decided to specify the offer:
''What about a big and juicy burger?''
''Fast food?'' Xiao Zhan’s eyes flashed as if Yibo offered him something forbidden but desired.
''Yeah'' the guy confirmed with pleasure. ''You react as if it is...''
''We just don’t normally eat fast food in our family,'' Xiao Zhan explained quickly. ''Mom cooks all the time and we always eat healthy food.''
''That’s great,'' Yibo nodded. ''But what about going to have a bite somewhere after work, huh?''
''I...'' carefully chosen words again ''I work near the house so... always eat there.''
''Hmm...'' Yibo pulled. ''Do you live with your parents?''
The guy nodded and Yibo got surprised a little: he worked, then he had already studied somewhere. But still lived with his parents... strange. Maybe, he looked after some sick grandma so he couldn’t leave separately? How old was he? Twenty-two? Twenty-three?
''So your stomach is unspoiled and pure then and isn’t accustomed to fast carbs?'' Yibo smirked. It seemed to him sometimes that he was talking nonsense, his tongue was his enemy, so to speak, but Xiao Zhan, apparently, had even less experience in such kind of communication, therefore he took everything literally and answered pretty seriously:
''Yes, it is. But I... want to try.''
Yibo gave him a conspiracy glance sideways, feeling like a tempter demon who got an innocent soul.
''Then I guess we should start your journey to the world of fast food with juicy fried chicken'' Yibo pulled into the parking lot at KFC. ''French fries and a lot of Coke - it’s almost a classic.''
When they went in, Xiao Zhan got lost near the cash register and didn’t know what to choose so Yibo made an order for him, paying for both of them.
''How much do I owe you?'' asked Xiao Zhan when he got his tray.
''Forget it'' they found a place near the window, shared straws and tissues. ''Just want to see your face when you try the leg.''
Xiao Zhan fished it out firstly from the big cardboard basket, smelled, then carefully bit and mumbled with pleasure and Yibo bursted out laughing:
''Jeez, you really never had fast food! I thought you were kidding me, can’t believe it!''
Xiao Zhan laughed and got shy a bit, and this wonderful facial expression mixed with the pleasure of eating tasty and forbidden food. At that moment Wang Yibo thought that the guy across the table was magnificent. He was charming, pure and innocent, he was definitely strange but... But…
''So you’re a teacher of singing, work with kids, live with parents and... how old are you?''
Xiao Zhan was chewing but Wang Yibo saw that he was getting embarrassed, he answered however:
''What do you think?''
''Twenty-three, at most,'' Yibo answered confidently.
That blushed a little and said:
''I am twenty-six.''
Yibo’s jaw dropped. Not even because the guy looked younger then he really was, but because of his manners and life experience he was more like a first-year student then a young adult person.
In any case, Wang Yibo felt and accepted him equal to himself, maybe, even a little younger and, of course, he didn’t expect that the guy in front of him is over twenty-five. Might Wang Yibo be too mature for his age?
''Wow'' he said finally. ''What’s your secret? Drink a lot of water? Never appear under the sun? It’s difficult in New Mexico.''
The guy smiled, shrugged his shoulders:
''My parents also look young for their age. They tell me that’s all thanks to healthy food'' Xiao Zhan sipped Coke through the straw, not without pleasure. ''And how old are you?''
''I am twenty'' said Yibo and carefully watched the reaction. It turned out that he had a little complex to seem small, like, not mature. Wow, he just learned it.
But Xiao Zhan just nodded, not reacting specifically. It seemed, he wasn’t bothered with such biases. Wang Yibo cleaned his throat, deciding to grab the bull by the horns, so to speak:
''So where do you live after all? In Las Cruces?''
Xiao Zhan carefully set the glass of Coke aside. Wang Yibo already knew he was going to choose words again:
''N-no... I... live in another place.''
Wang Yibo even got annoyed a little. Maybe, he was living at the range and couldn’t say it? But they didn’t have any secret objects there to... hold on, why damn range? He was a choir coach. It confused him so much so he just sighed:
''So where? In what place?''
''At the ranch El Rescate'' he answered quietly and gave Yibo a tense and piercing look.
The guy got confused. The name didn’t tell him anything. To be exact... it was a bit familiar, he could have heard the name a couple of times, for sure, but from whom and in what circumstances - he no longer remembered. However, Xiao Zhan was so tense as if Wang Yibo should have gotten up and gone away just because of the single name. As if he was expecting that each second. Yibo just lifted his eyebrows:
''What the ranch is it?''
Xiao Zhan relaxed a little:
''Don’t you really know about us?''
He just shaked his head and tossed a handful of french fries into his throat.
''Well... we live as a separate community, so we’re difficult to classify... I don’t know, more like... eco-village?''
''Like Amish?'' Yibo was curious.
''No,'' Xiao Zhan chuckled. We use the benefits of civilization. I drive the car, you saw that. We can use phones and computers, it’s not prohibited, we just... we, the ones who founded the community, wanted to get away from noisy cities and technological progress. Our community started to form in the 70s, my parents joined them in the 90s, I was too small when I started living at the ranch. But I have already gotten used to it and know no other life.''
All in all, it explained everything: his old-fashioned looks, no addiction to fast food and no mobile phone. Xiao Zhan was waiting for some strong reaction from Yibo, carefully asked:
''I should seem strange to you, shouldn’t I?''
Wang Yibo shrugged his shoulders:
''A bit, but it doesn’t pull me off''.
He was rewarded with a charming smile:
''That’s good. I’m glad. Usually when locals learn that I’m from the ranch, they react... not in the best way.''
''I’ve lived in Anthony for less than a year'' reminded Wang Yibo. ''I know the bare minimum about your eco-village. And why do locals react so?''
A shy smile:
''That’s because people negatively react to everything that they don’t understand... Some freaks settled in the desert, built a village, warded off from the outer world... they might be crazy, or criminals or...''
''Or crazy criminals, I got it'' Yibo took up and smiled back reassuringly. ''You seem normal, Xiao Zhan, and do not look like a crazy criminal.''
The guy sighed in relief, he seemed to be really glad that Yibo didn’t look at him as if he was an outcast.
''Now tell me something about yourself, Wang Yibo,'' asked Zhan and Yibo told him, then they went out of the place and set off to have a walk around El Paso. Yibo didn’t keep silent all the time, remembering one funny story from his life after another. He resembled his boss Pablo but Xiao Zhan liked it. He was a great listener, actually: kept looking at him and sincerely admired, laughed where necessary, surprised and amazed when required. Yibo, although he had never been a good speaker, felt how he got more open next to this guy, became somehow noisy and talkative, cracking funny and not really funny jokes left and right.
Finally, they came to some old but working cinema and Wang Yibo nodded at the entrance:
''Shall we come in?''
Xiao Zhan looked excitedly and hesitantly at the building:
''I’ve never been to the cinema.''
''What?'' Yibo got struck. ''Don’t tell me that you never saw any films!''
''Of course, I saw!'' the guy got outraged and blushed. ''We have a projector and they show us movies sometimes... They all are just old...''
Wang Yibo almost got pleasure from all that, asked:
''How old are they? Did you see ''Deadpool?''
''No'' he shook his head.
''Um... ''Mad Max''? ''Avengers?'' the guy still shook his head. ''The first ''Spiderman''?''
''N-no…''
''Lord of The Rings?'' asked Yibo, not believing his ears.
''No...''
''Titanic?'' shouted he, refusing to believe such things, Xiao Zhan got more and more embarrassed:
''N-no, Yibo...''
''Star Wars?'' he asked without hope.
''Oh, yes'' the guy shined with a smile. ''Sure! Harrison Ford is one of my favorite actors!''
''Oh, God...'' Yibo shook his head. ''You don’t even know how far you leg behind the world...''
''Is it that bad?'' Xiao Zhan asked sincerely.
''It’s fixable'' Yibo nodded, hardly suppressing laugh. ''Go, let’s start with something modern.''
But when they approached the timetable they saw that there was only one film about to start in fifteen minutes - ''Bohemian Rhapsody''. It was funny, Yibo was going to kill to birds with one stone and asked Xiao Zhan mysteriously:
''Tell me, do you know a thing about Freddie Mercury and ''Queen''?''
''Is it a band?'' he suggested carefully.
''Oh, so we’ll exactly watch this one!'' Yibo said with pleasure and got them two tickets. ''You have to know about this person, it’s a classic.''
Only a bit later Yibo realized that under ''classic'' Xiao Zhan should understand some other things, but it couldn’t be helped, he still had so much to learn! Wang Yibo had already seen the film so got more interest and pleasure watching Xiao Zhan. The guy looked like Mowgli who just got into civilization, except that he wasn’t wild. Like a blank slate where you can write whatever you want. Yibo felt that he liked that. He liked to show and open to Xiao Zhan things entirely simple, ordinary from the first sight. Maybe people feel the same when they talk to children... or foreigners. Xiao Zhan, raised at the remote ranch in the middle of the desert, was like a child exploring ''this brave new world''. Yibo got a wish to read Huxley or Kipling for the first time in many years.
Xiao Zhan reacted to everything unusually, interesting:
Zhan, do you want popcorn? - Why? We’ve already eaten. No addiction either to fast food or necessarily chewing anything while watching movies. An incredible human being.
There weren’t many people at the film show: Zhan and him, a couple at ''love seats'', four youngsters at the cheapest row. Although it was Friday, it was still day anyway. A couple above had started kissing even before the lights turned off and Xiao Zhan turned to them in surprise.
''What?'' quietly asked Wang Yibo. ''Is it not customary in your community to kiss in public?''
''No,'' he whispered, embarrassed. ''Is it okay for cinemas?''
''Quite'' answered Yibo, hoping that those two wouldn’t bonk right at the film show, otherwise Xiao Zhan would probably run away. ''Just try not to pay attention.''
When the film just started and there was the first background song, Xiao Zhan twitched and whispered to him:
''I’ve heard this music!''
Yibo only got comfortable at his seat:
''The feeling will haunt you the following two hours. Just enjoy.''
At the moment when Freddie had heard his future band music for the first time, Xiao Zhan leaned closer to his ear and whispered:
''I like this music too!''
An Yibo liked his closeness and the whisper into his ear got him goosebumps all over the body. Wonderful, he’d sit like that. He wanted to hold Xiao Zhan’s hand, but caught himself. It was too early for that, he would just scare him.
And when Freddie had sung for the first time, Xiao Zhan gasped and even leaned forward a bit. Wang Yibo grinned: that was a musician himself. He was wondering, how did he hear and accept all that?
At the moment when Mary Austin started to outline Freddies eyes in the fitting room, Yibo glanced quickly at Zhan: that looked calm and didn’t react. But when they got to the moment with Paul Prenter, Yibo noticed that Zhan drew himself up somehow but watched, watched - greedily and not turning away. His facial expression was difficult to tell.
Virgin or not? Did Xiao Zhan ever have any relationships? Did he like anyone? Did he kiss? Yibo had a bunch of questions, but while they were watching a movie, all that he could afford - Zhan’s reactions to the film's actions.
At the moment with Freddie and Jim Hutton Zhan drew himself up again and then suddenly... licked lips. That incredibly tore through Yibo’s body. It even ached in the groin and he shifted himself at the seat. Damn, that was too sexy! Zhan licked lips as if... as if he imagined the kiss on himself.
Fuck, Yibo, just breath. And you, Didi, stay still!
But the rest of the film he was sitting like on pins and needles, imagining Zhan’s tongue in his mouth. When the final credits started and the lights turned on, Xiao Zhan looked at him greatfully and sincerely said words, that went through Yibo’s heart like a wave of fire:
''Thank you. That was... so wonderful! Thank you for getting me here and introducing... introducing me to such a man!''
''No problem'' Yibo said confusedly. For him it was just a movie about a dead rock-musician, albeit cool, but for Zhan... for him it was a meeting with something greater. ''Do you want to take another walk?''
They went out of the cinema and moved towards KFC where there was Yibo’s car still at the parking lot. They discussed about the movie and Yibo tried to tell him more and clarify everything that he remembered about life and work of Freddie. And then when they got to the car, they sat in there and headed over to Anthony.
The day was drawing to its end. Yibo drove the car, flying down the highway, feeling that he should, obviously, ask Zhan all important questions directly. Feeling that the guy wouldn’t take the initiative and make a move. Maybe, he was infantile and passive, maybe, shy and inexperienced, maybe, he just didn’t care. But it would be stupid - to spend the whole day with the man and not to clarify all the questions, Yibo didn’t want to waste that time.
In the end, if it turned out that he didn’t interest Zhan as a sexual object, Yibo would leave the place and never set a foot in Anthony, Doña Ana County, state of New Mexico.
''Now I want to watch all the movies you told me about,'' confessed Xiao Zhan. ''I probably haven’t seen so much more interesting!''
''I’ll show you more 3D later'' Yibo blurted out but quickly caught himself. This phrase... this phrase of his said a whole lot. For example, that he wanted to see the guy again, go to the cinema with him again, and that he didn’t doubt - Xiao Zhan would agree. Maybe, it sounded too arrogant. But Xiao Zhan looked at him and asked:
''Would you like to repeat this day? Would you like to meet again?''
Here, that's the most appropriate moment, thought Yibo, when you can dot the i’s. Do not fear. Everything will become clear to everyone, at least.
''I would'' answered him. ''Xiao Zhan, I... like you.''
Yibo looked just at the road, being afraid to look at Xiao Zhan. But Zhan... Zhan looked only at him and said:
''And I like you, Yibo''.
Yibo pulled to the side and stopped the car. The dust raised and slowly settled around them, Wang Yibo breathed excitedly and gave him a careful glance. The guy looked at him openly and simply, with a slight smile on his lips that he bloody wanted to kiss, but Yibo was afraid to celebrate and asked a question that didn’t give him rest since the first time they met.
''Are you gay?''
A light crease appeared between Xiao Zhan’s eyebrows, he confusedly bit the lower lip:
''I don’t know. I don’t think I ever classified myself...''
''Ok, I’ll try again,'' Yibo quickly corrected himself. ''Do you like me as... as a guy?''
Xiao Zhan blushed, his eyes flashed, lips formed in the prettiest shy smile in the world and he said:
''Yes, I like you as a guy.''
Emotional fireworks blew within Yibo’s chest: exultation, disbelief, euphoria, desire, impatience... He understood at the first time what mutuality was like, he got on a hook right away and on addiction to such a feeling, to such a rare pleasure - to know and understand that the one you fall for was not indifferent to you.
''Can I kiss you?'' he blurted out before realizing his own words.
Xiao Zhan laughed:
''Yes.''
''Yes?'' waves of emotions came over Yibo, he drowned in them and didn’t want to be rescued.
''Yes.''
Then the guy quickly unbuckled his seatbelt and, leaning over the gearbox, pulled Xiao Zhan to himself by the neck and kissed, pressing his moist lips. He almost moaned from pleasure and taste, licked them and then broke into the mouth with his tongue, feeling how Xiao Zhan leaned to him, being held on only by his seatbelt.
When they already were out of breath, the kiss stopped but Yibo didn’t pull away, he pressed his forehead to Zhan’s, looked him in the eyes. They laughed shyly and then kissed again. Yibo unbuckled Xiao Zhan’s belt and pressed to himself more tightly, Zhan put arms around his neck, the kiss got fiery, dirty, Yibo’s hand slipped to Xiao Zhan’s fly but... he caught himself, stopped, intuitively feeling that they shouldn’t go too far. At least, now. Anyway, he didn’t snag Xiao Zhan in the club for one night stand. No. He really liked Zhan, so much, he didn’t want this day to end up with ordinary bangin’ in the car. That was too banal and even vulgar. Not for Xiao Zhan. Not for them. And of course not for his first time. They won’t be like that, not today, not in such a way.
Xiao Zhan was breathing with his mouth, his eyes flashed and Yibo saw that he also turned on. Maybe he was waiting for some particular action from him? Maybe, Yibo would disappoint him with inaction?
''We should get back to Anthony'' said Yibo and sat up straight, adding quietly ''otherwise I’ll swoop in on you right here.''
Xiao Zhan smiled softly and sat straight as well, fastening his seatbelt. Yibo copied his action, then found Xiao Zhan’s hand and laced fingers with him. Mine.
The hell with California, the hell with Chicago. Anthony is the best town on Earth, no matter what they say.
Yibo started the engine and went to the highway. They were driving in such a happy, cozy silence, the heart even dumped. Yibo held the steering wheel with his left hand, and in his right hand was holding Xiao Zhan’s - soft and gentle, he caressed his skin with the thumb pad. Suddenly, because of some cheering ease, filling up his chest, he chuckled and laughed, Xiao Zhan laughed with him in unison right away.
''Can you turn on the music?'' asked Yibo and Zhan reached for the radio with his free hand, choosing the wave. He stopped at Weezer - Take On Me (1), and Yibo was ready to be high from any old stuff.

When they got to the hardware store ''Tools at Billy’s'' (everything for life and repairs), Yibo, surely, immediately felt a light sorrow. He didn’t want to part with Xiao Zhan. He just got him - and now had to let him go. They got out of the car and went to the pickup truck. The guy took keys out of the pocket, they both awkwardly crumpled but Yibo took his hand again and asked:
''Can I kiss you again? Farewell.''
Xiao Zhan turned around. Wang Yibo didn’t blame him for such a gesture. It was absolutely certain that Xiao Zhan had never been in homosexual relationships otherwise he would have already classified himseld in this regard. Obviously, it was all new for him. But there was nobody around, and Yibo gently clinged to him right away, feeling with pleasure how Xiao Zhan’s lips opened under his pressure and caressed him back.
''When will we meet again?'' asked Yibo, looking the guy in the eyes.
''I’ll try to come over during the week.''
''When?'' he asked impatiently.
''Surely not on the weekend,'' said Xiao Zhan. ''At the workweek, I promise. I’ll come and say, when I’m free again.''
''Okay'' Yibo whispered into his lips.
''Okay'' echoed the guy.
Yibo saw that Xiao Zhan didn’t want to pull himself away from him, but he overcame himself, opened the car’s door and set by the steering wheel.
''I’ll be waiting for you'' said Yibo, leaning to the pickup’s window, where Xiao Zhan rolled it down. ''I’ll be thinking about you.''
Xiao Zhan gave him a long glance, he looked more like a holy angel, like he was shining from the inside.
''Yibo'' his voice was profound, sincere. ''Thank you.''
''Drive safe,'' Yibo smiled and stood up straight, pulling his hands into pockets.
He looked like Xiao Zhan went from the parking lot and started to miss him right at that moment. The guy came back to his car, started the engine with a sigh. He had to stay under the cold shower when at home otherwise Didi wouldn’t give him rest. And it was better not to tell anyone yet about Xiao Zhan. And he also felt as the happiest man on Earth.
Yibo randomly turned on the music, it was Take On Me again. He laughed, euphoric joy filled him, Yibo was rushing home.

Chapter Text

Wang Yibo woke up incredibly happy the next day on Saturday morning. The reason of happiness was obvious: Xiao Zhan.
Yesterday was the first and the best date of his life with the guy of his dreams. And the most beautiful thing about it was that Xiao Zhan liked him too, his feelings were mutual, and Zhang[g] proved that with his lips, embraces, tongue…
His Didi impatiently twitched up at the memory of yesterday's kisses, supported by natural morning arousal. He couldn’t get rid of it with just a cold shower.
Yibo helped himself to relieve the arousal, hastily rinsed in the bathroom, went into the kitchen, turning on the kettle and fishing out ingredients for a sandwich from the fridge. Wenhan appeared from his room, wearing only underpants. He lazily went into the kitchen, looked at the turned-on kettle, scratched his stomach, opening the fridge and silly staring in it.
Earlier Yibo could have glanced at him, holding his gaze at his butt, grumbled him something like ''get dressed'', expecting that Wenhan also could appear in some erotic dream of his, but now... now he didn’t care.
He was making his sandwiches and thinking only about one man from the whole planet Earth, not paying attention to his neighbor at all.
''Why are you so excited?'' asked Wenhan, shutting the fridge with disappointment.
''Nevermind'' merely answered Yibo. ''Do you want a sandwich? Shall I make it for you?''
''Excited and kind'' stated Wenhan, looking at him with surprise. He was never in mood himself in the mornings, especially when he didn’t sleep in because of his series once again.
''I have a weekend, slept in, the weather is great - are there any reasons to be sad?'' chukled Yibo, deftly spreading the bread with a mix of different sauces. ''Do you want it with ham and cheese?''
''You’ve met someone, haven’t you?'' the guy squinted suspiciously, sitting down at the table with Yibo. The kettle whistled and turned off.
He wanted to tell and at the same time didn’t. But Yibo decided to himself yesterday that he would wait with reporting to the whole world and all his friends-relatives about his happiness. After all, their relationship with Xiao Zhan just started. It was too early to talk about something concrete and deep in his soul Yibo was superstitiously afraid to scare his happiness off.
''Hmm, might have'' he answered anyway, smiling mysteriously.
''No way!'' exclaimed Wenhan. ''Did your gay-radar get the apperance of a suitable target? Here, in Anthony?''
Yibo just smiled at him, made himself a coffee, left one of the sandwiches for Wenhan and set off to have breakfast in his room.
He had to decide how to spend his weekend. As a rule, on those weekends when he didn’t go to parents, Yibo just silly stucked at home and played some on-line games. Did sports a little, and a little - some domestic stuff. But he felt that today he won’t sit quietly at home. There was too much energy within him, so the guy decided to spend it in the right way and to go to Las Cruces for shopping, which he had been wanting to do for a long time but kept postponing it.
He ran out of perfume and it wouldn’t hurt to buy a couple of fresh T-shirts, after all, and stock up some condoms and a lube - well, just in case, Yibo didn’t have high hopes, of course…
He was afraid to make assumptions if Xiao Zhan and him would get to the real intimacy or not. Eventually, he had already had three attempts, and he was sure each time that things would work out. He decided to not speculate, to not hope so much and to not dream, and just solve problems when they come, although, sure, there had already lived and glimmered a hope deep inside him from the very beginning…
Yibo quickly reached Las Cruces, parked at the biggest mall, taking only a wallet with him. He was going to start his rounds with the top floor and gradually get down, not spending much time on all those little shops, but his trip finished already on the first floor even before it started. He was just passing by the electronics department where there were displayed some phone models in a row and…
Wang Yibo, what the hell of a man are you? You had seen each other just three times, just one date and several kisses, and you are already here and arrange a purchase of a phone under your name, choosing him a cute casing along the way…
His mother wouldn’t approve such reckless spendings, it was non-practical beyond measure. It even wouldn’t probably work out between them. He could just take the gift and wave him bye-bye. No, even worse: he could not even take the gift at all! He had the full right to refuse such an expensive gift, you are just no one to him and what are you going to do with two phones?
But only imagining that Xiao Zhan would be in touch around the clock, that Yibo would get messages from him, would just write him ''good morning'' and ''good night'' whenever he wanted, that he would be able to talk to him, when he doesn’t see him - just out from these fantasies alone everything filled with pink vanilla within Wang Yibo, and he started to smile like a fool.
He spent all the money that he had planned to spend on himself, to buy the phone. There was nothing more to do in Las Cruces. He hesitated a little more, understanding that it was better to get back home, so he did it, not actually regretting anything. He missed Xiao Zhan and was just burning with the wish to see him again and give him the gift.
The rest of the evening he spent bothering with the phone. He charged it fully, installed the most simple messenger and added his phone number to the list of contacts. At first he signed himself as ''my boyfriend'', giggling out of joy like a child, then he thought, after all, and corrected that to ''Yibo''. And put ''Take on me'' on the phone call and also downloaded all ''Queen'' albums. And took dozens of pictures of himself, having saved the most normal photo in his phone memory.

He didn’t know where and how he would be able to give the present to Xiao Zhan, so he’d made a decision to keep it in a glove compartment of his car, just in case.
On Sunday he had to work out his Friday shift, therefore he got to work in the morning, as required. That day Pablo decided to organize a small inventory for several groups of goods, so he was stuck at the store too, so did Old Sam, having come to work for support, so did Mrs. Cruz, who brought her homemade tacos for Yibo and ''he dearest boys''.
Yibo’s unusual upbeat mood was noticed by everyone. Pablo grunted with interest, scanning the young boy’s glowing face, Old Sam kept silent as well, Mrs. Cruz was telling him some nonsense, counting something on a big calculator tool along the way. Yibo was amazed at how she managed not to make any mistakes.
''Look at our Yibo'' her husband told her ''he must have reached some progress in his love life that weekend. Come on, lad, go fess up: is that why you swapped shifts with Sam?'' his boss bugged him.
''Get off the boy!'' Mrs. Cruz defended him. ''Yibo, eat tacos, dear. Or take home some. I’ve done so many of them this time...''
''Thanks, Mrs. Cruz'' he told her, fishing the treat out of the container ''delicious, as usual!''
''Thanks, dear'' she smiled and went deep into the store in search of some invoices.
''I bet you hold back some juicy story'' Pablo didn’t give up. ''And I know that time, in the 94s, when I was almost a young boy, just like you, I came across one girl, when my friends and I went to Rio Grande, mmmm, Jeez, what a girl it was!..''
Yibo was barely listening to him, running through product nomenclature, and his thoughts were floating around Xiao Zhan. He could think about no one else but him. Where was he? At the ranch? What was he doing? When would he come to him as he’d promised? When would they be able to have some time alone?
''Yibo, do you hear me?'' Pablo raised his voice, knowing that his worker’s thoughts were somewhere far away. ''Sam, just look at his happy face!''
''He’s in love'' Sam cast these words, slightly shrugging his shoulders.
''Fess up, who’s she?'' Pablo got onto him. ''Does she live here, in Anthony? Or in Chaparral?''
Yibo sighed, looked at the director and said: ''Pablo, I’m gay.''
The man froze in disarray, licked lips, turned to Sam who kept former equanimity, then made a half-step towards Yibo, leaned closer and said:
''Okay, guy, you just do not worry. After all, doctors have already proved that it’s not a disease. Everyone can... ''go down a slippery road'', so to speak... Hm... I remember, in the 96s, when even I...''
But Mrs. Cruz, who came back to them, didn’t give him a chance to tell them what was in the 96s. Yibo just smiled at the words of his curious and compassionate boss. He wasn’t offended, he seemed not to be able to experience any negative emotion now but a lingering desire to have Xiao Zhan here right now.
They kept working in silence when Yibo remembered about something and asked his boss:
''Pablo, tell me... do you know anything about a settlement ''El Rascato''... ''El Pescato''... something like that?''
''El Rescate'' Sam corrected him right away and his voice sounded glumly.
Yibo lifted his head up to them and saw that all three, the men and Mrs. Cruz, were looking at him attentively and carefully.
''Babe, just don’t you say, that the reason of your glowing eyes and enduring smile lives in that place'' said Mrs. Cruz.
Yibo vividly recalled right away the words of Xiao Zhan and how locals reacted to them when they found out he was from the community, so he quickly said:
''No-no, I just heard about the place recently.''
''What did you hear?'' Pablo asked him completely seriously. ''Someone approached you on the street? Like Mormons do that?''
Yibo even got confused a little: ''Erm... no, no one approached me...''
''They’ve not done like that for a long while'' said Old Sam to Pablo.
''So what is the place?'' Yibo frowned. Of course, their reaction was more than interesting.
''They call themselves ''eco-settlement'' Pablo told him gloomily. ''Freaks, who are surely off their heads. Don’t mess with them if you encounter them one day.''
''Why?'' all of that interested him more. ''Is ''eco-settlement'' a bad thing?''
''They’re really strange, unsociable, avoid people, you see?'' there was a distinct enmity in Pablo’s voice. ''It’s quite clear that in this... this ''community'' they hustle some shady deals...''
''...there’re a lot of rumors about them, but nothing’s been proven'' Mrs. Cruz picked up the words of her husband.
''Nothing’s been proved because they have connections in the state government!'' her husband snapped back, sighing deeply. ''It’s told that congressman Cole is actually his son!''
''Well, generally, no one will ever know, I guess'' Mrs. Cruz told Yibo. ''They live very isolated. Of course, they accept people from the outside, but by no means all.''
''My second cousin wanted to stick to them'' Old Sam gave a voice ''back in the 80s. Just out of interest, to look what they have there. They drove him away halfway through, he even didn’t spend a night there. Strange folks.''
Well, hmm, now it was clear why Xiao Zhan tried not to enlarge on the fact that he was from the community, Yibo thought. If everyone reacted in such a way...
He suddenly thought that people, when they gather in a huge mass, are not smarter than sheeps. People in Anthony’d been living next to various rumors that they multiplied by themselves, cultivated and painted each in their own way. Their hatred, incomprehension, and rejection had been growing with each decade more and more, densely taking roots in the minds of the citizens of this town. And no one really wanted to actually understand, probably, everyone thought that they had already learned and understood everything. But Wang Yibo wasn’t spoiled by Anthony’s air and maintained the ability to look at things from different angles, he saw that people from the ranch El Rescate were most likely not as horrible as locals had already managed to fantasize. Of course, he didn’t know all of them but he got to know Xiao Zhan. And yet his impressions were more than pleasant.

Xiao Zhan didn’t come on Monday although Yibo was waiting for him the whole day, twitching each time at the opening door. Pablo ordered Sam and him to run through the storage and sort goods according to the new order, so the older one was sitting at the cash register and looking after the store, while the younger one was carrying heavy boxes at the storage back and forth. And, though Old Sam promised to call him if ''that tall Asian'' comes to the store again, he kept reacting to the bell ring anyway, looking out nervously.
Xiao Zhan didn’t come on Monday, in the end, but he came on Tuesday. Black trousers, white shirt and a tie - a very official look. He was definitely just passing through, and, probably, Anthony wasn’t on his way, but he’d promised - and came, and Yibo, just when he saw him, grinned with a happy smile, dropping to Sam on the go:
''Look after the hall, okay? Think of me as I’m on a lunch break.''
Old Sam just gave Zhan his usual tired-indifferent glance and said nothing, and Yibo ran to him out of the counter: ''Hi.''
''Hello, Yibo, I won’t be long...''
''Alright, then let’s go'' he took Zhan’s hand and walked him behind the counter and then deeper to the store, through the storage to the back door, where Old Sam and Pablo had smoking space and a bench.
Just when the door was shut behind them Wang Yibo cupped Zhan’s face with his hands and kissed passionately. The guy twitched shyly first, exhaling: ''Yibo!'' but then relaxed in his embrace and responded to the kiss. Yibo pressed him against the store wall, remembering, however, about his white shirt, and put his hands between the wall and his shoulder blades.
When the deep greeting kiss cut off, Wang Yibo said, looking him in the eyes: ''I missed you.''
Xiao Zhan kept hands on his shoulders: ''I came by not for long, just to say, that I can meet this Friday, later in the afternoon, after 6pm.''
''After 6pm? So late?''
''But I’ll be able to stay later'' Xiao Zhan’s gaze flashed but he momentarily lowered it.
What was that? Was it a hint? Yibo got worried, but caught himself right away: he shouldn’t go ahead, it was better to play it by ear.
''I got your point'' he said, although he didn’t actually get anything. Just a vague, blurry hope for... for something, but it was already wonderful. ''Let’s go, I have something for you.''
Yibo walked him, taking his hand, to the car. They got in and, having opened the glove compartment, he fished out a box with a packed phone.
''This is for you. Open.''
''What is it?'' Xiao Zhan asked more out of confusion, because he definitely saw what it was, he could actually read. ''Yibo...''
He opened the box, touched the gadget with tips of his fingers, his face revealed his bewilderment and anxiety, and it seemed to Yibo, that he was going to refuse:
''Yibo, I...'' box got closed, and Wang Yibo hurried to reassure him, put a hand on top of his:
''No, don’t refuse it, hold on.''
''Yibo, but it’s actually...''
''...just a phone - nothing more'' he tried to convince Xiao Zhan.
''No, Yibo, it’s a very expensive gift, all the more...''
''All the more what?'' the guy cautiously bit lips.
''All the more for people, who don’t really know each other'' carefully said Zhan and watched his reaction intently.
In fact, that’s what Wang Yibo had expected, that Xiao Zhan would refuse the present. He was right, they really just started to get to know each other, and Yibo didn’t have any idea, how to convey to him, that he needed all that more for himself:
''Don’t think that you’ll owe me something for it or that I want to win you in such a way. That’s more of a present for myself, did you get it? I want to have an opportunity to text you, want to have an opportunity to call you, did you get it?''
He did, Yibo saw it in his gaze. And more Zhan was really glad to hear something like that:
"Yibo...'' his voice was soft, grateful. Wang Yibo melted inside out of this softness just like sugar.
''Let’s do it that way'' Yibo found words ''it’s a present for me, not you. Would you give me a present, Xiao Zhan? I’ll be really glad.''
The guy chuckled, tilting his head in a somehow cute way:
''Alright, Yibo, good... Maybe it’s not a bad idea... Thanks'' he reached for him and gave his cheek a chaste kiss, but Yibo got a wave of trembling and pleasure out of it. He took the initiative and kissed his lips, passion picked up steam, Zhan even moaned into his mouth. It was all hot and arousing, it was all so…
''Yibo!'' Zhan leaned back first, giving a short glance at the watch on his wrist. ''I need to go. I’ve already stayed for too long.''
''Where’re you heading now?''
''I need to get to Las Cruces till 3pm, it’s for the glee stuff.''
They went out of the car, bypassed the store from the side, approached Xiao Zhan’s pickup:
''I’ll text you'' said Yibo. ''I installed a messenger there... Have you ever used smartphone?''
Already standing at the car, Xiao Zhan glanced at him: ''I’ll deal with it.''
Yibo caught himself: his gaze clearly told - ''I’m not stupid'', and it was really so, Yibo felt that. Xiao Zhan may have less life experience in some stuff and he didn’t watch the latest movies, but it didn’t say anything about his intellect.
''Okay, sorry'' Yibo squeezed it with a little guilt.
''It’s me who should say sorry in advance'' Zhan told him ''when I’m not able to answer you right away.''
''Forget it'' he shaked his head. ''We’re meeting on Friday after 6pm - it’s the main thing.''
''Are you picking me up from here? I’ll leave here my car.''
''Okay'' Yibo shrugged and Zhan got into the car. The guy wanted to kiss him again, but he didn’t do it for some reason, watching Xiao Zhan heading to Las Cruces.
It wasn’t enough Xiao Zhan for him, he wanted more... But now he could text him about it anyway.
Yibo took out his own phone, opened chat and sent him first a turtle, that was waving and smiling, and then wrote:
''I’m looking forward to Friday. Text me whenever you find out how all that works.''

Chapter Text

Xiao Zhan answered his first message right that evening, closer to midnight:
''Hi. Seems I figured it out finally''.
Wang Yibo almost jumped up in his bed out of joy, because he certainly had only been waiting for the guy to answer him for the whole day.
Surely he wrote him back right away and the texting started out. The one, that can only be between people who are attracted to each other but still don’t know each other well. They were texting till very late at night and the next day Yibo was awfully sleepy but happy. The communication went on in the same way on Wednesday and on Thursday.
Xiao Zhan texted him from time to time throughout the day and started talking fully only in the evening, after 10 pm. It was obviously because of his work schedule, maybe because of his regime in the community, who knows. Yibo didn’t ask. He felt that he shouldn’t yet interfere with all Zhan’s spheres of life, the guy would tell him everything with time. Yibo wanted to call him already the next day, on Wednesday, just to hear his voice, but Zhan stopped the attempt:
''I’m busy now, can’t talk. You’d better write to me.''
And in the evening when Yibo repeated his request, he told him:
''Everyone is already sleeping. Parents go to bed early. Don’t want to wake them.''
Whatever. People actually didn’t call much these days. They still had voice messages and old-good SMS and Yibo texted and recorded him voice-messages about something all the time. Zhan listened to the voice mails but just messaged back with long texts, not yet giving Yibo to listen to his voice.
But they were constantly, non-stop talking anyway. After the evening last Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday Wang Yibo had learned a lot of new information about Xiao Zhan.
Xiao Zhan told him that he had come from China, that back in the 90s the leader of their community had come to China to visit Tibet, his parents had occasionally met him since they had been having their vacation in Tibet that time. His parents’ worldview and their thoughts on how to live incredibly had coincided with John’s view (he just called him John). John [i]told them that he had founded a community in New Mexico for him and his like-minded people and Xiao parents had decided that they had to be among them.
Xiao Zhang had been 6 when he had moved to the USA from China with his parents. English had been the worst challenge because the boy couldn’t really understand it but in the community he had found a lot of people from different countries. They had spoken English to each other and gradually started to borrow words here and there and then they had started speaking some burning mix of all the languages in the world within the community. He told him that his community wasn’t that big, just 500 people. That right after they had come from China, Xiao Zhan started to sing in a choir that John’s wife had created. Then Xiao Zhang grew up and took over her responsibilities and took care of the boys.
He said that on days he wasn’t occupied with the choir he went out shopping and helped out at the building site. They always built some houses for freshmen and he was responsible for ''purchasing''.
Of course, their conversation didn’t consist only of constant Xiao Zhan’s monologue. Wang Yibo learned that gradually, asking, and Xiao Zhan for his part learned about him, about his life.
The guy asked for details about how Wang Yibo got to New Mexico and where his parents worked; what the school he attended looked like and what subjects they had had; what Wang Yibo liked to do in his free time, where he had been and what he had tried.
It looked as if through him Xiao Zhan was trying to feel the real life that he hadn’t lived himself, and Yibo even sympathized with him a little but was afraid to ask yet if Xiao Zhan wanted to leave the community forever. For example, with him.
It was early for such a question, though Yibo, thank God, wasn’t afraid of responsibility. More likely, he was afraid to scare him off.

With such leisure conversation the Friday came closer and they had to decide how they wanted to spend their second date. In fact, Yibo felt they had to decide it himself. He felt as if he was a leader in their relationship and at the same time he felt that he had to talk to Zhan as minimum respectfully, that the other guy wouldn’t stand pressure and coercion to anything.
So he, as a tightrope walker-stuntman, after having thought a dozen times about what he wanted to convey, having bit his lips while looking for necessary information, resolved yet to write.
''Do you want to come visit me on Friday?''
Xiao Zhan didn’t answer for a long time. While waiting for him Wang Yibo had regretted the sent message ten times. He was nervous, wondering how the guy might view it. What if Xiao Zhan thought that Wang Yibo would want to get him into bed to ''work off'' the present? Or maybe that he just would want to use the first opportunity and get handsy?
Although Yibo wouldn’t really mind getting handsy, he didn’t want Xiao Zhan to think so about him. He was looking at their emerging relationships with all sincerity and honest intentions, after all. He didn’t want to offend Xiao Zhan and, moreover, to scare him, so Yibo breathed out when he got his message:
''Sure, why not? I wonder where you live. You’ll show me your room and your collection of musical albums you told me about, and photos from your trips. I’ll be glad.''
Perfect, thought Yibo, that’s what I should aim for and not think about anything else. We’ll be listening to music for the whole evening and looking through photos. Not that bad for the second date. I don’t have to think about sex constantly and get anxious. And, moreover, I don’t have to hope that with the fourth attempt I would be able to lose my virginity - otherwise it won’t definitely work again. I should calm down. Yes, calm down and let the situation go with the flow.
But the first thing he did on Friday morning (he’d swapped shifts with Sam again), was change the bedding, tidy up the room, he washed himself in the shower long and precisely, shaved his armpits, looking skeptically at his crotch. Then he made up his mind and got there with the razor too.
He thought about the treat and went to the supermarket for food (was Xiao Zhan going to drink? Did he drink actually? And if yes so what? Wine? Whiskey? Or just beer would be enough? Yibo took a little bit of everything), bought starters, skeptically observed aroma candles on the shelf (come on, no), brought all of that home and, at the final, knocked hesitantly on Wenhan’s door.
The guy was watching his favorite series. It was his second, or maybe the third favourite thing after fucking and eating. Today Wenhan had a day off in his shift schedule and he was sitting in front of the laptop in an undershirt and underpants, having surrounded himself with snacks. On the laptop screen there were Winchester brothers fighting another evil, and Wang Yibo skeptically nodded at it:
''Is it still ongoing? Or you’re rewatching?''
''Rewatching before the release of the new season,'' Wenhan smiled, throwing a handful of popcorn into his mouth.
''Aren’t you sick of it?''
''You’re kidding? Of course not! Dean agreed to give away his body to archangel Michael but he broke the deal and captured him. I’ll be the first to buy the subscription for a new season!''
''Okay... Wenhan, erm... I wanted to ask you for something...''
''Uh?'' he unwillingly set the episode on pause and turned to him fully at the end.
''I... in short, I... someone is going to come visit me.''
Wenhan didn’t still react, just looked at Yibo, expectantly, and the other man clarified:
''Well, I mean, I’ll have a date. Yes. Not a friend-date but... well, you got it.''
Wenhan’s brows rose up, his smile widened from ear to ear and he exclaimed:
''A date?! A real date, Yibo? With the reason of your good mood and of the tastiest free sandwich that you made for me?''
''Uh-huh...'' Yibo’s ears reddened and he got so shy but he couldn’t resist a smile.
''Hell, that’s amazing!'' Wenhan jumped up and slapped his neighbor’s shoulder. ''I’m so happy for you, bro! Will you introduce us? I’m sure he is a cool guy!''
''Uh... Wenhan, that’s what I wanted to talk about,'' Wang Yibo felt twice awkward because of what he was going to say. ''I actually wanted... to stay alone with him, do you understand? I’ve never brought anyone here and I rarely ask you for anything but... could you this time...''
Wenhan bit his lip, scanned Yibo, thinking about something, and then his eyes widened:
''Nooo! Don’t you tell me...''
Yibo felt right away that his ears and neck went burning.
''Don’t you tell me that you’ve already reached some hootsie-tootsie!''
''Hootsie-tootsie? Wenhan, oh Jeez...''
Yibo wanted to perish out of shame, he felt embarrassed, but Wenhan pounced on him, took his head in a grip, laughing and trying to look him in the eyes:
''Oh well, decided on ''chimney sweeping'', well, you know, ''running down to the chocolate shop''! Made a ''human hot-dog!''
''Aah, enough! Yes! Yes, maybe we’ll have sex!'' Yibo dodged Wenhan finally. ''Jeez, crazy pervert, where did you get all of that from?!''
''My friend, I’m so happy for you! Let me hug you!'' Wenhan kept on mocking and Yibo just let the guy hug him, having decided to humbly wait out his idiocy attack. ''Finally my neighbor will let someone deflower him!''
There he slapped his ass and noticed:
''Don’t forget to prepare your little chrysanthemum, anal sex is not a joke, bro.''
Yibo dodged again and first looked at his neighbor with a squint but then decided to clarify:
''Uh... I am top, bro.''
''Are you?!'' the other guy was sincerely surprised. ''Really? Since when?!''
''I think... I’ve always been,'' Yibo didn’t expect such a reaction from his neighbor. ''And why did you think it was different?''
''I don’t know, you’re just... so pretty and... thin... Hell, I don’t know! How do you actually realize who is top and who is bottom?''
And here Wang Yibo got stuck. Really, how did he see it? And did he see at all? Before that moment he had been sure that he was guided by his intuition. Bottoms were... just seen. Even when they weren’t that cliched mannered sweethearts but pumped-up bearded men. They were distinguished by their inner softness, pliability, high emotionality or something... The hell knows. And what if he wasn’t right? He didn’t have any experience after all. What if all those three times when he had been going to lose his virginity his partners considered him in a passive role and he just didn’t know that? They actually hadn’t discussed anything like that and it seemed to him that his top position in sex was obvious to the naked eye but here it was... And what if Xiao Zhan was top?
And, though it was difficult to believe, Yibo attempted to imagine how Xiao Zhan put him on all fours, settles behind and... a wave of sudden arousal went through his body and he tried to mask it under the made-up cough, first and foremost for himself. Damn. He shouldn’t have imagined that.
''We say it with words using our mouths,'' Yibo told Wenhan. All his feelings, thoughts and doubts ran through his head just in a second. ''All in all, can you sleep anywhere else today? I’ll owe you pizza and beer, if anything.''
''Pizza, beer and Netflix subscription.'' he slapped Yibo’s shoulder. ''What it does for friendship! Of course, I’ll swap my shifts with someone and will go to work. And guys'll still be happy."
Yibo breathed out and went to his room, listening to how Wenhan called the replacement and agreed with him on the evening. Wenhan was a good, understanding guy, after all. At that moment he appeared at the doorway of his bedroom in half-dressed jeans dragging on the floor.
''Listen, Yibo, you just... want me to leave you a couple of spliffs? You can smoke with that guy just to relax... The deal is quite responsible.''
Yibo looked at him with shocked eyes and asked, shaking his head:
''Do you know that I want to become a cop?''
''And what?'' Wenhan throwed his hands up. ''That’s New Mexico!''

''Are you going now?'' Wang Yibo was talking via headset putting on his socks at the same time. ''I’m already going to pick you up.''
''Yes, I’m on my way'' he heard Xiao Zhan’s voice. ''It’s just so uncomfortable to drive and hold the phone, actually...''
''Put it on speaker... there is a small horn on the screen, Xiao Zhan...''
''Ok, it seems, I got that... Do you hear me, Wang Yibo?''
''Yes, I perfectly do!'' the guy smiled, thinking that in such moments Xiao Zhan was like a cute elderly.
''In short, I’m on my way but something is knocking in my engine. Or not in the engine, but something’s knocking. I’m not really good at mechanics. I don’t know, you hear?''
''Seems, I do.''
''I’ll have to go to the repair shop. But I’ve never brought the car to service in Anthony. There is a man who is busy with it in the community. Do you know any good places?''
''Of course. They’ll make it good and not expensive, I’ll show you.''
''The main thing is to get to you and not to get stuck in the middle of the desert,'' he chuckled.
''Don’t worry. You’ll share your geolocation with me and I’ll find you with a navigator and take you in tow, if anything.''
''Now I understand why people are so attached to their phones. See you, Wang Yibo.''
''See you, Xiao Zhan''.

He looked a little bit confused but happy, when he went out of his pickup towards him. Yibo wanted to kiss him all over but near the store there was unusually crowded and the guy didn’t resolve.
''What’s wrong with your car?'' Yibo wasn’t an expert himself but it was pleasant for him to realize that he looked like that in Xiao Zhan’s eyes.
''I don’t know, just listen...'' Xiao Zhan started the engine and the guy really heard the drumming knock from the inside of the car. ''What could it be?''
''I don’t know,'' he confessed honestly. ''But Tommy Suite does, he is a good mechanic and a backslapper. Let’s go to him.''
Xiao Zhan tried to start the engine again but it didn’t work this time. The car stalled as if it had been only waiting for the moment when they got to the store ''Tools at Billy’s''. Wang Yibo hooked a cable to the nose of the pickup and they somehow got to the car repair shop. The ideal start of the date, well...

Tommy was a young mechanic but already had a reputation of a good specialist. He examined the insides of the car with interest and scratched the back of his head:
''It feels like you build this pickup with spare parts found in a landfill, guy,'' he grunted and glanced at Xiao Zhan. ''It’s just an entertaining constructor of items of different years and models. Funny.''
Xiao Zhan felt embarrassed, it was seen with a naked eye, Wang Yibo dragged attention to himself:
''Can you tell why the engine died?''
''It’s not that easy to tell,'' he sighed and put his hands on the hips. ''Leave me this technological wonder for a night, I’ll dig it through. Come next morning and if I don’t fix it I will say what's wrong, though.''
Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan exchanged glances, stepped aside and Yibo told Zhan in a low voice:
''We don’t really have a choice. The car won’t go till next morning.''
Xiao Zhan was really nervous, licked and bit his lips:
''That’s not really good... I should inform the community that I had to stay in the town for the night. They... hm, would want to send someone for me.''
Yibo, certainly, didn’t like the strict rules of the community Xiao Zhan lived in. He frowned:
"Are you prohibited from staying overnight out of the village?''
''Of course, we aren’t but...'' Xiao Zhang frowned, sighed. ''Okay, I should warn my parents anyway. So they won’t get anxious. And I should find a place to spend the night...''
''No problem,'' Yibo replied fast. ''You can stay with me.''
Xiao Zhan stared Yibo intently in the eyes, the guy even felt awkward, Xiao Zhan said quietly:
''You told me that you don’t live alone.''
''Wenhan is just working today at night shift, so... everything is alright.''
''Really?''
''Sure!'' Yibo furtively touched his hand and whispered: ''We can sleep in different rooms if you feel uncomfortable. Don’t think about it.''
Xiao Zhan smiled insecurely at first, then his smile got even warmer and he whispered back and it caused tingling warmth spreading through Yibo’s body:
''Ok, thank you, Yibo.''
He want to kiss him that moment even more and Yibo almost reached for him but then they heard some delicate cough from Tommy Suite:
''So do you leave pickup or not?''
''We do,'' said Yibo and Xiao Zhan suddenly remembered:
''Oh, wait, there’s something in the car! I almost forgot! Just a sec!'' he opened the passenger seat door and fished out something round, wrapped in a waffle towel. ''That’s for you, Wang Yibo. A present.''
Yibo got in his hands something that felt like a weighty dish, it was passed carefully and he asked confusedly:
''What is it?''
''It is... a pie,'' answered Xiao Zhan and suddenly blushed in embarrassment. Yibo saw how the color painted over his cheeks and neck. ''Of course, I understand that it’s nothing compared with a phone but...''
''Did you make me a pie?'' the guy interrupted.
''Yes,'' replied Xiao Zhan and added as if it was significantly important, ''with apples.''
They were standing in front of each other, the pie was between them, Yibo was looking in the eyes of the guy of his dream and was just dying out of wish to stick the tongue as deep in him as possible, and moreover - to take him all in. No one had ever made him a pie, not with damn apples, not with anything else, no one boy, excluding his relatives and friends, ever made him a present. That touched him right away, right away shot him deep down. The phone he had bought for Xiao Zhan seemed like a trivia now but the pie! Pie!!
''Thank you,'' he could only breathe out, overwhelmed with emotions.
They went to Yibo’s car and triumphantly put the pie on the passenger seat. Then Xiao Zhan said that he needed a payphone booth to call the community. Yibo looked at him as he was an alien from the Middle Ages:
''Zhan, don’t want to disappoint you but... all payphones were almost fully demolished. They just remain in very old movies that you watch and in memories. Now everyone has a phone. You can use yours to call your parents.''
The guy hesitated, choosing words:
''I can't, I... they don’t know I have one.''
Yibo got confused: ''Why?''
A licking of lips again, a resolute sigh:
''Otherwise I should’ve explained to them where I’d got it and why and something like that,'' each word was difficult for Xiao Zhan. ''Too many unwanted questions and I... I’m not ready to tell them about you yet.''
Wang Yibo sighed with understanding and clarified: ''Zhan, uh... do your parents know that you... well, that you can like boys?''
The guy looked in front of himself and shaked his head. Well, clear. Xiao Zhan might not have figured things out for himself, not to mention coming out. And something told Yibo that his parents weren’t really liberal open people.
''Then maybe you could call from the repair shop since we haven’t gone too far?'' he offered.
Tommy Suite, sure, was surprised with such a request but, fortunately, didn’t ask any questions and just gave them the old landline phone with sagged and worn buttons. Xiao Zhan dialed the number:
''Hello, Kelly? Hi, it’s Xiao Zhan. Yes, don’t be surprised. I’m calling you from the repair shop...'' he talked about the situation with a car for a couple of minutes, then said he would stay overnight in the town. ''No, no need to send anyone for me, everything is alright. I’ll rent a room in a local hotel, it’s not that expensive. No, really, don’t bother guys, it’s okay. I know... Sure, I’ll bring bills. No. No, I’ll pay for the room by myself, don’t worry, everything’s alright. Of course. Yes. Yes, I’ll give a report to John by myself if necessary. Tell the parents, okay? Yes, see you tomorrow.''
He hung up with obvious relief. And this conversation made Wang Yibo angry: damn hell, Xiao Zhan was an adult man and he had to report to someone on the desire to stay overnight beyond the community? What a trash?!
''Who’s Kelly?'' he asked when they went back to the car.
''She’s... how do I put this, John's secretary, maybe, this is the closest. His assistant. She answers calls and in general... keeps in touch with the outer world, so to speak.''
''Hmm...'' Yibo fastened the seatbelt and started the engine. ''Zhan, are you going to have troubles because you stay overnight out of the community?''
''It’s alright, Yibo'' he smiled but the smile wasn’t really confident.
''Why do you have to report such nonsense to this John of yours? Do you have such strict rules there?''
''Yibo, please, don’t think about it'' Xiao Zhan just lightly touched his hand but this gentle action instantly dispeled all the inner discontent of Wang Yibo. ''Let’s go to you - drink tea, eat the pie, listen to music and look through your photos, as we planned, yeah?''
''And did you bake the pie just by yourself? Alone? And no one helped you?'' Yibo even smiled.
''Why does it seem so strange?''
''I don’t know. As for me, I can’t cook, so...'' the car started from where it had stayed and headed towards Yibo’s home where there should have been their second date. That, in current circumstances, Wang Yibo put so much sweet hopes on.

Chapter Text

Thank God, Wenhan had thought of opening the doors for ventilation before going out, thought Yibo, closing the door behind him and Xiao Zhan.
''Well, welcome to the bachelor pad! Here is where I live.''
He kicked off his sneakers and went inside first and was just going to tell him ''you don’t have to take off your shoes'' when he saw that Xiao Zhan had already done that, neatly putting his sneakers to the wall.
''The right door,'' Yibo smiled at him. ''Come in. I’ll take the pie to the kitchen.''
Yibo carefully put the dish on the table and, not being able to hold back curiosity, unwound the towel. That was a simple rich-dough round pie, without any decorations, but for the guy it was, of course, the best and it smelled wonderful as only fresh pastry can do.
''Do you want coffee or tea?'' Yibo shouted from the kitchen and heard Xiao Zhan’s voice: ''Tea!''
Yibo dug through his and Wenhan’s stash. They didn’t really have tea, having got addicted to coke, beer and energetical drinks. Yibo could bet Xiao Zhan had never tried energetical drinks throughout his life. Finally, in the far corner of a wall cabinet he found a package of Lipton tea bags with lemon flavor with just only one old and forgotten bag left. Damn. He had bought alcohol and starters for them but he hadn’t even thought that they could just drink tea but in the case of Xiao Zhan it was more than logical. Damn. Alright.
Yibo turned on the kettle and went to the room. Xiao Zhan was standing in the middle, turning around curiously.
''It’s... cozy here.''
''Oh, come on.''
''Yes, it is! Very good room,'' a warm smile but Wang Yibo noticed anyway that Xiao Zhan felt a little bit restrained.
''You just... have a seat,'' and here Wang Yibo realized that it was only possible to sit on the bed in his room or an office chair on the wheels that was at the working desk. Zhan chose the bed: set carefully, on the edge, with a perfectly straight back. Wang Yibo felt even more embarrassed: he couldn’t just sit on the bed, it was too intimate. Therefore he sat down in the office chair opposite. They were looking at each other and remained awkwardly silent, Xiao Zhan spoke first:
''You wanted to show me your collection of musical albums.''
''Oh, yeah!'' Yibo realized. ''Well... Ok, there we go.''
He opened an appropriate folder on the laptop, with some sub-folders of musical genres. That wasn’t just a melting pot of different tracks, each one was in its place and Yibo was secretly proud of the orderliness of his musical collection.
''Do you want to listen to anything?''
Zhan got shy for some reason: he lowered his long lashes, smiled lightly (Yibo caught himself thinking that he would like to bite the corner of his lips): ''I... imagined ''the musical collection'' differently...''
Yibo smirked: ''Did you think I have a bunch of CDs?''
''Something like that.''
''You know, in general, it was just like that 8 years ago. Now the world has changed,'' Yibo chose one of the musical folders and turned on a playlist: ''Listen to these guys. Italian band. They’ve only just debuted but they have some potential. I occasionally came across one song...''
The music started in the background (1), Yibo heard as the kettle turned off in the kitchen: ''Alright, shall we go and taste your pie?''
He brewed the only teabag in a mug for Zhan, and for himself - but on the second time, giving away all ''rich taste with notes of fresh lemon'' to his guest. Almost ceremonially cut the pie, noticing how Zhan nodded his head to the beat of music. When Yibo broke off with a fork the first piece of pie for himself Zhan eagerly watched his reaction. Yibo decided right away that even if the pie tasted like a burned carton (not that he tried it, of course), he would still call it the tastiest pie on Earth and finish it off. But he didn’t have to lie: the pie was really good. Soft, sweet enough, juicy apples - Yibo hummed with satisfaction and Xiao Zhan’s face brightened, while he was sipping from his mug... and carefully put it aside, blushing again.
''What?'' Yibo grinned. ''Is the tea bad?''
''Yes,'' Zhan sincerely confessed and started giggling. ''So awful, Yibo, sorry.''
Wang Yibo giggled too: ''And the pie is just great, Zhan, really.''
They were laughing like fools and couldn’t stop. Maybe there was their common nervousness that splashed out and, at some moment, Yibo didn’t even noticed that impulse - pulled Zhan to himself by the neck and kissed his lips, deep and juicy, as he had wanted to kiss him since the very first minute he had seen him today going out of his pickup. No, maybe, even much earlier.
Xiao Zhan answered the kiss and reached towards him. The kiss with a taste of apple pie.
''Hello,'' Yibo whispered, touching his forehead with his own.
''Hello,'' Xiao Zhan echoed.
Didi, of course, was already standing like a pioneer, only give him a reason, a little boy scout. Yibo fidgeted on his chair and crossed his legs trying to calm the beating heart and finish off his piece of pie.
''If the tea is awful shall I make you some coffee?'' Yibo, not even standing up from his place (fucking Didi), reached into the fridge, thank God, size of their kitchen let him do this. ''I have milk. And juice. Would you like?''
Zhan agreed on juice and they somehow were able to finish their dinner. They were listening to music and talking: ''Tell me, how do you have fun in the community?''
''Uh, well... I can’t say that fun is what we pay much attention to,'' he was choosing words again but this time he was more relaxed than usual. ''We have a boy choir, girls are mainly busy with handcraft. There’s a film to watch once a month, and we have a little library. We like music most of all. We have three loudspeakers and sometimes we stream music via them. As a rule, it’s a classic. There’re a lot of people in the community who can play musical instruments, sometimes they do it. What else?''
''Television? Sport? A lotto game for elderly?'' Yibo suggested.
''No, you remember, eco-village... My parents wanted me to grow up without the television. I don’t know, probably I missed on something but my childhood was actually... interesting,'' a light smile. He began to examine his interlocked fingers as he was talking about his childhood. ''We all were really good friends. Children, I mean. We grew up together and we formed a big company. We always played something, we had so many games and we didn’t need to buy anything for that. We made toys out of everything, by ourselves, we observed nature. You now, some bugs and insects... Once a big rattlesnake crawled into our settlement. I think it was a Texas rattlesnake. We got scared so much. And one boy, a Corean, his name was Seung-yeon, was pressed against the wall. He wasn’t able to run away, the rattlesnake had blocked his way and Seung-yeon was afraid to move. And the snake rattled with its tail... It was terrifying.''
''And what did you do?'' Yibo asked quietly.
''We called John,'' Xiao Zhan chuckled, not really out of fun, and shrugged. ''It seemed to us that only he was able to do something.''
Inexplicably Yibo got an unpleasant feeling out of the mention of John. Maybe Zhan sent him some non-verbal signals that he couldn’t understand.
''And what did he do?''
''Oh, yeah!'' Xiao Zhan’s eyes flashed somehow feverishly but he hid that flash under his lashes right away. ''He performed almost a miracle... He went to Seung-yeon and shielded him from the snake and told us not to be afraid. That we had to be in harmony with nature, that the snake was afraid of us itself and that we had to make friends with it... And then he grabbed it by tail and throwed over the wall, and it didn’t even try to bite him, it was so obedient...''
Yibo didn’t understand why but he didn’t like Xiao Zhan’s story terribly. There was something in the tone of his voice and his face, in how he kept himself - somehow alert, intensely - something was wrong. He grunted: ''You’re talking about him like he is some kind of saint...''
Xiao Zhan flinched as if he came to his senses and smiled shyly right away:
''No, I don’t! John is an ordinary man! Just in childhood... he seemed to us, boys, miraculous.''
Yibo saw how Xiao Zhan kind of shook off the memories, laughed a little and sipped his orange juice, licking his lips. Music fell silent. Album was over.
''Can you please play them one more time? I liked them,'' asked Zhan and Yibo turned the album on again.
They were sitting in his room on his bed, Wang Yibo told Xiao Zhan: ''Photos, if anything, are on the laptop too. Do you want to see?''
The guy smiled slyly, playfully catching his fingers with his own: ''Let’s talk better. Tell me about your childhood.''
Yibo fell with his back on the bed, dragging Xiao Zhan to himself, and the guy rolled over on his stomach, leaning on his elbows. His fingers were fiddling and pulling the pile of a fleece blanket, Wang Yibo looked up at him with an adoring look, he spoke quietly, actually he wanted only to whisper now: ''What do you want me to tell you?''
''What are your most bright childhood memories?''
Yibo smiled, thinking for a short time:
''Disneyland. And another one - when my parents and I went to see the Grand Canyon. And when Santa Claus gave me a big plush bear - I was too small those days. But once I saw a giant spider. And bursted up with tears. My dad came and just killed it. Your John wouldn't probably approve that.''
Xiao Zhan chuckled mirthlessly with the corner of his lips, then bit the lower one and looked at Yibo, maybe, he was resolving: ''And how did you... How did you understand that you like boys?''
He had never discussed it with anyone, a flash of realization ran through Yibo’s mind. The guy gently touched Xiao Zhan’s cheek, ran his finger across the line of his cheekbones to the adam’s apple, tracing the line of his neck:
''I’ve always known it, since my childhood. Girls weren’t really interesting. I liked to play only with boys. And when I was in primary school on St. Valentine’s Day I gave a valentine to a boy. But my classmates didn’t appreciate that.''
''St. Valentine’s Day?''
Yibo wondered if he would ever stop being surprised with Xiao Zhan’s unusualness.
''Yes,'' he explained patiently. ''St. Valentine’s Day, February 14, All lovers’ day. It’s a tradition to give cards, chocolate and presents to someone you like. I gave a card to Hung, the most beautiful Asian in our school. He was Vietnamese. He called me a ''faggot'' and didn’t accept my feelings.''
Xiao Zhan’s eyes widened in a sincere sympathy: ''I’ve heard... that people here are more loyal to... to someone like us,'' he whispered.
Yibo understood that ''here'' was beyond the community and he also caught a hint in these words that, maybe, in the community they viewed that negatively. Then it explained a lot.
''But not in the primary school,'' Yibo mirthlessly chuckled, running his fingers through the man's hair. ''Children are cruel sometimes, didn’t you know?''
Xiao Zhan shaked his head: ''No, we were very good friends.''
Xiao Zhan succumbed to the affectionate touch, moved closer and then looked him in the eyes and said: "I would’ve accepted your valentine".
His inner innocence agitated him, Yibo was touched and aroused at the same time, he dragged Zhan to himself, to his chest and kissed him deeply, takingly. The weight of his body intoxicated, Wang Yibo pressed him closer, then he turned Zhan under him and hovered over:
''Zhan...'' their eyes were burning, their hearts were speeding up in a run, their lips were sore but they didn’t want to stop, they wanted only to continue.
However, a suffocating fear came over Wang Yibo, he was too anxious despite his dick was already hard and was about to burst his jeans. He realized that now, as a self-confident alpha and a top he had to kiss this man all over, take the initiative and do everything but... He wasn’t damn sure of anything, he didn’t understand whether Xiao Zhan wanted that or not, what he was waiting for from him and what was better to do and how to behave - out of anxiety or lack of experience the guy didn’t understand anything. He had to talk to him but then how could he just ask out of nowhere: ''Xiao Zhan, I want you, take off your pants and, yeah, by the way, I’m a virgin yet''?
In the blink of an eye Wang Yibo lived through that storm of emotions, it slowed him down a lot, dried his throat, he blinked foolishly, staring at Xiao Zhan and told to him, reddening with ears: ''I’ll be here, wait.''
And then he just escaped to the bathroom.
Wang Yibo breathed and his hands were shaking so badly. Hell, he should’ve had a drink of courage and not have sipped damn tea. Having washed his face and calmed down a little, he realized that he had two ways out: either to talk to Xiao Zhan and to admit his inexperience or pull himself and pretend to be a confident guy who knew what to do. But he couldn’t even imagine how to portray such a guy. His hands were shaking as he really was an inexperienced virgin. Okay, fuck it. If Xiao Zhan mocked him - so be it. But he was still sure he didn’t do that…
I would’ve accepted your valentine.
Ohhh…
Wang Yibo sighed and went out of the bathroom. Xiao Zhan was sitting on the edge of the bed again, his back was straight, his hands were clasped between his laps, his glance was a little concerned.
''Calm down,'' Wang Yibo chuckled to him awkwardly, though he was the one who should calm down first.
''I’m calm,'' Xiao Zhan said tranquilly and looked at him expectantly.
''You are? Okay...''
Yibo bit his lips and resolved finally: "I have to tell you something, Xiao Zhan. About me, I’m... In fact, I... have never had relationships and I...''
''...Yibo...'' Xiao Zhan caught his hand.
''I’m not so...''
''Yibo, I know,'' Xiao Zhan sighed and stopped him.
''What do you know?'' the guy breathed out.
''That you have no experience,'' he answered calmly and pulled him to himself.
Yibo sat next to him on the bed and asked stupidly: ''Where do you know it from?''
''You wouldn’t have been so nervous otherwise,'' the man smiled warmly.
''Is it so obvious?'' the guy wilted.
''Yes,'' Xiao Zhan nodded. ''Sorry, Yibo, but it is.''
''And what... what do you think about it?'' he mumbled, afraid to look at Xiao Zhang.
''What could I think about it?'' he asked.
''Well... I don’t know,'' Yibo’s ears were burning and he said tightly. ''To be ashamed. That’s... not cool at all.''
And after that Wang Yibo heard a laugh but then his cheek got touched gently and Zhan’s whisper was gentle too:
''Should I be ashamed of the fact that you had nobody? Innocence is not cool? Yibo...''
And Xiao Zhan moved closer to him by himself, softly touched his lips and then confessed:
''I think it’s me who should be ashamed because I do have experience. And that I’m not innocent for a long time - that is what’s not cool at all. I wish I could be as innocent in front of you just as you are now. But I’m not like that.''
Of course Yibo hadn’t expected that they would have a deep intimate conversation. Zhan’s confession excited him but at the same time he felt relieved because Zhan viewed that differently and he wanted to convey to him that having an experience wasn’t a shame either.
''Zhan, it doesn’t matter if you had someone or not. I like you, I like you so much! I really want you to be my first and if you want that then I...''
Instead of answering Xiao Zhan kissed him and Wang Yibo was all trembling inside like a leaf. Just look at him, top-active, hilarious, but he gave himself away to Xiao Zhan as he was - shaking, insecure, inexperienced, and Xiao Zhan accepted him with all the gentleness, affection and thrill that he was capable of.

They were kissing unhurriedly, biting and licking each other’s lips, taking off their clothes (Yibo from Zhan and Zhan from Yibo), they were examining each other and touching each other’s collarbones, necks and spines. Yibo crumpled his buttocks, leaving more and more wet and hot kisses on his skin. When Xiao Zhan took off his jeans Yibo slowed down a little, trying to understand if Zhan liked what he saw. It seemed to him for some reason that Xiao Zhan could reject him at any second but Zhan didn’t do that, of course. Having glanced at him, he only pressed Yibo to himself and gently cupped his dick, running his hand.
Wang Yibo suffocated just out of the first move, moaned into their kiss, exposed himself, didn’t want that to end. He didn’t even think that it would be so good, with those guys from the club it hadn’t been like that at all. He still tried to cling to the edge of Xiao Zhan’s pants, tried to take it off but his hand was so gentle and moved so right that he wanted to only relax and give himself away. Yibo didn’t notice as he leaned backwards letting Zhan run with kisses down his neck and nipples, closed his eyes and when man’s soft lips kissed out the relief of his stomach. But he opened them wide, when Xiao Zhan’s hot breath scorched his crotch and his tongue licked from the root to the glans.
''Zhan!'' Yibo breathed out in some anxious embarrassment, and the guy looked up at him with his big black eyes and whispered, brushing his balls with lips:
''Yibo, can I please you?''
Wang Yibo waited long to answer, and Xiao Zhan accepted it as approval. He ran with his tongue up the whole dick and with a gentle embracing move took it in right till the middle and then - till the end! Yibo moaned and flew away, feeling that he was shamefully close to release.
Think about something disgusting, he said to himself. Worms, stinky and dirty bums, spiders..., but it didn’t help because Xiao Zhan began to stroke him with his tongue, not letting him out, how was that even possible?! Yibo didn’t know, he didn’t know anything at all, he moaned, the room floated somewhere and he was able to whisper only:
''Zhan, I...''
And then he came strongly into his mouth feeling spasms all over his body. And Xiao Zhan accepted everything he gave him, and swallowed, Heavenly mother, and he didn’t let a single drop!
Yibo’s temples pulsed. Probably it was a micro-stroke and not an orgasm? He hardly caught his breath, was lying powerless and melted, he wasn’t even able to turn his head and lift an arm.
Xiao Zhan’s face appeared somewhere on the side: his eyes and lips were a little wet and he was smiling to him so gently and asked: ''Yibo, is everything good? Are you good?''
It was difficult for him to express the whole palette of emotions that he had just experienced, therefore Wang Yibo just pulled Xiao Zhan to himself and kissed him. Kiss with the taste of his own cum. It wasn’t disgusting. Sincere gratitude overwhelmed his whole being, he wanted to please Xiao Zhan too but the kiss took out the rest of his power and he just closed his eyes, lifting his chin.
''I want to go to the bathroom,'' Xiao Zhan told him and, laughing, went out of the room. Yibo recovered from shock. He hadn’t expected all that, to be exact... he had expected he would lose his virginity finally but not that all of that would start with a gorgeous blow job and that he would get thrilled deep down. He’d never come like that just never in his life. And, of course, he’d never felt anything like that.
Just for a second a fear flashed in his mind: what if that was all he was going to get? He gave up the idea right after he had it: even if it was so and access to the body was over for today even though what happened to him today was so wonderful that he had nothing to regret. Wang Yibo only wanted Zhan to feel good too.
Xiao Zhan came back with wet hair, having wrapped in a towel: he had obviously had a shower.
''Is that your towel? Have I guessed right?'' he asked.
Yibo nodded and stretched hand to him. Zhan climbed to him and nestled near, burying his nose behind his ear.
''That was perfect, Xiao Zhan,'' Wang Yibo confessed quietly. ''I felt so good.''
The guy laughed delightedly and hugged him, they started kissing again and then Zhan asked with fiery eyes: ''Have you never really been with anyone?''
That minute Yibo wished it had been so. He wanted to forget about that three blow jobs in a gay-club restroom, two out of them were about to end up with sex. He might have understood for the first time the value of innocence in the eyes of Xiao Zhan. But he wasn’t going to make the reality better than it really was.
''There’ve been three times, when it almost ended up with sex but... there weren’t relationships. Not like between you and me.''
Zhan didn’t get upset, just bit his lips and asked: ''And do we have relationships?''
''We do,'' answered Yibo. ''And if we don't, I would like that we do.''
Xiao Zhan smiled and lightly kissed Yibo, the guy moved his hand across his back in a viscously-sweet laziness.
''Do you want me to tell you about my experience?'' asked Zhan.
Yibo carefully examined his face and asked in his turn: ''Do you want to?''
The guy shaked his head with a sad smile. Then Yibo thought that, certainly, Xiao Zhan had experience but it wasn’t traditional relationships that helped him to understand his orientation, for example. His smile indicated some toxic ex from the past that you didn’t really want to talk about.
''Then you don’t have to'' he summarized. ''If you don’t have to remember then forget. Let’s start over with a clean state.''
Xiao Zhan gratefully clung to him and rubbed his cheek against Yibo’s, leaving on it another gentle kiss.

Chapter Text

Xiao Zhan kissed perfectly: his tongue was hot and flexible and now, when Yibo had found what it felt like on his dick – sweet memories about the blow job would never give him rest.
So he tried to take in as much of Xiao Zhan as he could, get as saturated with him as possible. Although he understood that it wasn’t. He understood that the moment he would say good-bye to Xiao Zhan he would want him back right away: to himself, in himself, on himself, differently.
The debut album of the italian band had been played the third or the fourth time, but Xiao Zhan liked it and Yibo didn’t pay attention.
They were kissing more and more passionately, Yibo’s hands waved down his back, his hips, buttocks, shoulders, chest. Wang Yibo unwind the towel from his waist with a slight movement and looked, greedily absorbing the image of his dick, hard and deep red framed with coarse black hair, with a fucking path rising up to navel.
''I want to please you too, Zhan,'' said Yibo. ''But I’ve never done it before. Would you allow me... to try?''
The guy smiled and lay down on his back, putting as many pillows under his head as possible to have a better view. Yibo placed himself between his legs and started to fondle Zhan’s penis as the guy had done to him - licking it from root to the glans, kissing the frenulum, masturbating with his hand. He wanted to do everything carefully and affectionately, understanding that he couldn’t take it in fully at the first attempt. It was important to him not to scratch Zhan with his teeth, and the guy gently embraced the glans with his lips and tongue, diligently sucked and sniffled, and Zhan could do nothing but smile.
''What?'' Yibo lifted his eyes. ''It’s not really sexy, is it?''
''No, it’s... pleasant,'' Zhan smiled politely. ''And you’re very cute.''
''Hell, blow job’s not supposed to be cute!'' the guy got upset but Zhan interrupted that right away with a hot kiss and then asked fast: ''Do you have lube?''
Yibo got nervous, reached into one of the closest drawers, fishing out the bottle. Zhan poured some lube in his hand and trustfully looked him in the eyes: ''Will you stretch me?''
Yibo nodded and licked lips. Zhan lay on pillows again and spread legs in front of him: a free, welcoming, vulgar movement. Yibo’s dick got hard out of it right away, he put his hand down to the crotch and greased the hole framed with black hairs, kneaded his testicles, slided on his aroused dick and got back to the hole, circling around it with tips of his fingers. All that time the guy was watching his lover’s reaction: as his mouth opened, his breathing increased, glint in his eyes, and when Xiao Zhan whispered as he exhaled ''Stick in me'' - he stuck one finger, thrilled with his tight walls and incredible internal heat.
Zhan breathed with his mouth open, smiled: ''You can add one more.''
Yibo did that, not forgetting to stroke his dick and testicles, he began to move his fingers carefully, trying to find prostate. Zhan relaxed, breathed hot, loudly. Yibo could do nothing but kiss this breathing over, leaning to him, changing the angle where his fingers entered. Xiao Zhan bent and moaned:
''What, Zhan? Here?'' Yibo whispered somehow feverishly. ''Is that it?''
The guy nodded and spreaded his knees wider and Yibo tried to massage a little lump inside Zhan, watching as he was moaning and his eyes rolled back. Young man’s dick was so hard and twitched, and Yibo got down on it with his mouth, licked it with lube, not thinking about anything and not worrying. It seemed to him that Xiao Zhan would come into his mouth just out of massaging prostate but the man came into his senses first and stretched his arm to him: ''Enter me with your dick, Yibo...''
Wang Yibo carefully took his fingers out of him and put his glans to the hole remembering about condoms at the last moment: ''Oh, damn... Wait...''
He got to the bedside table and tried to open a new pack. Fingers slipped[i] on the pack and Yibo was angry, rushed but, at the very least, rolled condom on his dick, greased it from the top and got back to his former place between Xiao Zhan’s legs, as if he was afraid to be late.
He was able to look him in the eyes when he pushed inside, and Xiao Zhan caught that glance. And a wave of euphoria and incredible pleasure rolled over Yibo. He fell down on Xiao Zhan right away and started to lick him: neck, lips, nipples and then pushed blindly, trying to figure out his feelings, more and more, until he found his own rhythm. And Xiao Zhan helped him, waved his hips, pressed him with his impossible long legs, prompting into his ear:
''Alright, Yibo, yes, that’s good... no, don’t rush, don’t... here, yes, prostate here, yes, Yibo... again, yes, mmm!''
Yibo was in him, in the guy of his dreams, with his tongue and dick inside in his body. He got captivated by the pleasure, so strong, and he felt an orgasm approaching again. That was inevitable, desirable but damn that was so unfair’! He wanted Xiao Zhan to come under him first, out of his dick, without hands as it usually happened in the hottest porn videos but, sure, it didn’t happen.
''Zhan...'' he moaned, pushing himself against his body. ''Zhan, I...''
''Come,'' the guy whispered, gently squeezing Yibo’s dick in his body.
''No, no, but you...''
''Don’t think about it, that’s okay.''
''Zhan, oh, jeez...'' and he finally came into the condom, pressing cheek against his chest.
His first orgasm from the full sexual intercourse, so sweet and juicy, better than he had imagined. He just wanted to relax fully and roar a little, like a lion, fall asleep just like that, on this chest, not pulling out. Xiao Zhan let him lie till Yibo’s arouse didn’t fall, stroked his back with hands and kissed his hair.
After overwhelming relaxation came the feeling of guilt: Xiao Zhan didn’t come. For some reason he wanted to cry out of frustration: he couldn’t make him come either with his dick or mouth. Useless virgin. No, already not. Realization of this fact caused a smile that was unable to hold. Yibo rubbed against Xiao Zhan, carefully getting out of his body, covering his chest, neck and a face with grateful kisses. He wanted to confess his love to Xiao Zhan, really wanted to, but he restrained himself, being afraid that Xiao Zhan would misunderstand his words.
''Zhan, wait a little, okay? I’m taking time and then we’ll definitely have one more time...''
''That’s not necessary at all,'' understanding smile and gentle touches to hair.
''But you’ve not come yet and I’ve done it twice!'' his lower lip stuck out, so childish, and Xiao Zhan right away took it in his mouth in a sweet kiss, answering:
''That’s alright. I feel good with you, and that’s the most important.''
''Are you hungry?'' asked Yibo. Probably, food was all that he could give him that time. And his own stomach dropped too.
''Not really,'' Zhan shrugged but Wang Yibo got out of bed anyway, fishing out shorts out of his wardrobe. His bones ached[j] and he wanted to lie and do nothing but he gave that opportunity to Zhan, wanting to take care of him: ''You can lie and I’ll make sandwiches for us. They say I’m kinda not bad at it.''
Yibo slapped with his bare feet to the kitchen, fished out all necessary things out of the fridge, automatically turned on the kettle and only then realized:
''Zhan, maybe you want coffee?''
The guy appeared in the kitchen in only his trousers, caressed his back and looked in the eyes.
''Is everything alright, Yibo?''
The guy caught his lover’s hand and kissed his palm.
''Today’s the best day of my life. And you?''
Xiao Zhan laughed and sat on the chair: ''It seems, in mine too. I’ve not decided yet.''
''Mm, did you have better days?'' Yibo provoked him, mixing sauces.
The guy looked quietly-happy and answered not really loudly: ''I can’t choose between this day and the day you told me you liked me.''
Yibo felt butterflies in his stomach from these words. Cliche but he really felt it like that.
''You bribe me so your sandwich will be the tastiest?'' for sure, out of embarrassment he could say such nonsense.
''Would you give me a double portion of bacon?'' Zhan supported his joke, batting eyelashes, and it seemed to Yibo that they had been made to each other.
''Hey, guy, two more of such glances and I’ll give you my sandwich too,'' Yibo made them two cups of coffee. ''With milk and sugar?''
''I don’t know, I don’t drink coffee.''
''So, I’ll make it like for myself and you’ll tell me if you like it or not. So, uh... we were talking about your attractiveness.''
''Come on,'' Xiao Zhan took a bite of sandwich and chewed precisely, then concluded: ''That was really tasty. Dare I say it, amazing.''
''Don’t change the topic,'' Yibo laughed. ''Do you know, you’re eye candy?''
''Yibo...''
''No, really. Have you ever been told that?
Zhan leaned closer to his plate so crumbs wouldn’t fall on the table, shrugged: ''I was told in childhood that I’m cute. But everyone is cute in childhood.''
''No, you’re not cute,'' Yibo responded, correcting himself, ''to be exact, not just cute, you’re handsome’, really.''
But Yibo saw that Zhan didn’t believe him. He just shrugged again: ''I don’t feel like that. And do you,'' he asked in his turn, ''feel that you’re handsome?''
Yibo thought about it:
''In childhood everyone also called me cute and often pinched my cheeks,'' he finished with his sandwich, shaking his hands off[l]. ''You should’ve seen my cheeks, they were like hamster’s, so big. Then when Hung rejected me at primary school I was sure for many years that I wasn’t handsome at all. But you know, teenage acne also didn’t make me more confident... And then my friends supported me and also saw me off to a gay-club. My mate went with me just for company. He was, in fact, straight but he went just like that, to support. Everyone was hitting on him the whole evening and he tolerated that just for me.''
''And you?''
''That evening I understood that I wasn’t so ugly and other guys can like me,'' he chuckled with a corner of his lips.
''You’re not ugly at all,'' responded Xiao Zhan with his disarming simplicity. ''I liked you the moment I saw you.''
Yibo glanced at him and then decisively took his hand: ''Let’s go.''
''Where?'' Zhan giggled but stood up from his place.
''Let’s dance.''
''What?''
''Can you?''
''Erm... no.''
''That’s not difficult. I’ll teach you,'' they stood in the middle of the room, Xiao Zhan stiffened right away, Yibo stroked his naked shoulders. ''You don’t have to learn any movements to dance. Sometimes just to shift from one foot to another to the beat of music means dancing too. The main thing is to relax and take pleasure.''
''Well... okay.''
''I’ll change the track...'' Yibo reached to the laptop, turning on a slow melody and looping it so they would have more time. (2) Pressed himself to Xiao Zhan, throwing his hands upon his shoulders. ''Repeat after me. Just move to the beat and watch as I do it.''
''That’s all?''
''Yes. We aren’t going to do anything else. The main thing is to relax.''
Yibo tried to set the pace and Zhan seemed to give in but then got embarrassed again.
''No, Yibo, don’t, I’m...''
''What are you embarrassed of?''
''I don’t know.
''Of me?''
''No.''
''Then what? We’re alone in the room.''
Xiao Zhan smiled ambiguously and then Wang Yibo picked up a crumpled blanket and threw it over their shoulders, wrapping them both into a single cocoon:
''Is it better now? No you aren’t looking at yourself. Come on, just press on me and dance with me.''
Xiao Zhan gave in, buried in him and closed his eyes, trying to get into the rhythm-flow. When he stopped evaluating himself from the side he was able to do that and that even started to bring him joy. They were listening to music and dancing to the beat when Yibo told to his ear: ''Thank you.''
''For what?'' responded the guy.
''For going on a date with me and, you know... for everything. Thank you for giving us a chance.''
The guy smiled. Yibo felt his warm breathing next to his ear, then Xiao Zhan asked: ''What is he singing about?''
''Um... He is singing: Like air you'll breathe me, on the day I'm hiding you and you know that if I lose you, I'll never walk a meter again.''
''Beautiful. Is it Italian?''
''Yes.''
''Do you know Italian?''
''No,'' Yibo confessed, ''just googled words.''
Xiao Zhan laughed and whispered to him soulfully: ''You know, I might remember this moment till the rest of my life...''
Yibo found his lips and kissed deeply and sensually but this time without haste. He didn’t rush, he pressed Xiao Zhan to himself, caressing his tongue, his lips and Adam's apple. Wrapped in a blanket they went to the bed and fell on it. Xiao Zhan was on top, kissed Yibo, beginning to moan out of rising passion. Yibo turned him under himself, threw the useless blanket aside, pulled off trousers from man and shorts – from himself, pressed himself against him with a semi aroused dick, stroking where he only could reach but Xiao Zhan turned them to sit on the top again. He took Yibo’s dick into his mouth again but this time just to make him wet out of saliva and then saddle Wang Yibo and press his glans to the hole.
''Will it hurt you?'' Yibo whispered confusedly.
''No, it doesn’t hurt with you,'' he responded and slowly sat while his own dick was twitching. Yibo stroke his hips with hands and whispered to him honestly and passionately:
''You’re so beautiful now. You’re so beautiful, Zhan.''
Xiao Zhan breathed out sweetly and began moving, resting his hands against Yibo. He wasn’t just riding or squirming on him – he was dancing. Really was dancing on him, to the beat of music, as he felt it, as he could, as Yibo taught him. The guy suffocated, pushed hips from below, caressed his dick and only then remembered that they’d forgotten about condoms.
''Zhan, we...'' his face reflected insecurity. ''We forgot about protection...''
Xiao Zhan stopped on him but didn’t pull out, he looked down with guilty, licked dry lips and said: ''I trust you. And I had... I had just one partner.''
Maybe that was really, really stupid but that moment Yibo trusted Xiao Zhan. And he told him about that: ''I trust you too. Be with me, Xiao Zhan, please, move, don’t stop.''
And the guy leaned to him, kissing and keeping on dancing. Feelings were, certainly, better – brighter and richer, hotter, sharper... But Yibo didn’t want to come so fast, as last time, he turned Zhan under himself again and tried to control the coming pleasure – slowed down, then stopped at all when it was too much. And more he just really really wanted to lead Zhan to orgasm so he stroked his dick, tried to reach the prostate and understand how he liked that – gentler or harder, faster or viscously-slow. Zhan was relaxed, succumbed, spreaded and finally whispered feverishly, prompting: ''Soon, Yibo, just stroke the glans in a circle, so, yes... move, stronger, Yibo, stronger...''
And Wang Yibo moved and caressed and looked as he was moaning and shrinking with all his body and then cried out letting splashes of white sperm. At that time in his narrow butt everything squeezed Yibo so powerfully, pulsated, so hot that the guy himself didn’t stand that and came inside not being able to realize it first.
This orgasm was sweeter then the previous ones because he held on so thoroughly and, of course, because they did it without a condom. Yibo moved a little more, bringing the waves of pleasure all over their bodies, Zhan was lying fully relaxed and open, having spread his legs on both sides. He was wonderful. He was his, Yibo’s. And Yibo consolidated that feeling with a deep kiss.
''Let’s sleep?'' he smiled to Zhan but he, despite looking exhausted, whispered to him: ''I don’t want to sleep.''
And Yibo understood why. Sleep now was such a useless pastime. When would they have another opportunity to be alone in an empty flat, belonging only to each other?
''Zhan, I want to ask you,'' Yibo was fully serious. ''Will you be honest with me?''
The guy drawn himself up, brought knees together and looked up at him: ''Ask.''
''Have you ever thought about leaving the community?''
Of course, Yibo was taking a risk now. He didn’t know anything about Xiao Zhan, after all, either about his community or what he felt about it and why he was still living there. But Xiao Zhan was looking at him as seriously as he did and then quietly nodded.
''Why haven't you left yet?'' he asked.
''I have nowhere to go,'' Yibo saw that Zhan was fully sincere. But was that the only reason? Yibo didn’t resolve to dig deeper, it was more important to him to learn something else:
''Would you leave with me?''
Xiao Zhan kept silent. He swallowed convulsively, was really nervous, breathed out in complete confusion: ''Yibo...''
''I know that we barely know each other! I know that our relationships just started and I am rushing this but... just... just tell me: if everything is as good as right now will you leave the community with me?''
''And would you love to have serious relationships?'' the guy specified.
''Sure!'' Yibo leaned on him with passion. ''I only want serious relationships with you, Zhan! I know that I might not look reliable, I’m young yet and I’m only going to study but it won’t bother us, really, it won’t! I have some savings and we can leave for Chicago or California. I'll show you the world, Zhan, the real life! You haven’t seen so much yet! We’ll watch films every day, watch all the classics, and I'll help you to find a job. You’ll get used to it, you won’t even notice as you become an ordinary average guy and, if you agree just to think about it... Just think about it!..''
''I will,'' Zhan answered him and pressed his hand, pulling Yibo to himself. The guy lay to Zhan’s side, kissing him next to the nipple. ''Films in the evening are cool...'' he pulled dreamily.
''And we’ll eat fast food at the weekends,'' Yibo enticed him, ''and go for a walk in big parks, holding hands. We’ll get a dog.''
''I love cats,'' Xiao Zhan ran fingers through his hair.
''Then we’ll have a dog and a cat,'' he mumbled. ''And we will make love every day and save money for traveling... And then we’ll set off somewhere, you’ll like it, I swear! I would love to get you to the ocean. I bet you’ll lose your mind when you see the ocean, Zhan...''
And then Yibo fell asleep.

Yibo woke up out of morning arousal. Surprisingly, given that he had come three times several hours ago. His dick touched[o] the soft warm buttocks of Xiao Zhan that was lying on his side with his back to him. Yibo moved closer, hugging the man, went along the spine to the edge of his hair with dry warm kisses. Yibo’s hand slipped to Zhan’s stomach and he realized that he was aroused too. Having clenched fingers on his dick, Yibo passed his hand up and down a little. Xiao Zhan was slowly waking up and, still soft, languorous, whispered to him in the morning stillness: ''Take me...''
Wang Yibo bit his earlobe a little, squeezed his buttocks much stronger. He needed a lube. With saliva, as last time, he wasn’t able to get in. Good that the tube was still not far. Yibo squeezed some and precisely smeared it all over his dick, then moistened fingers and put them inside the hole, two at once. Zhan moaned in hollow voice, Yibo asked immediately: ''Hurt? Did it rub much already?''
''No, get on, I want,'' he said stubbornly, bending his back.
''Zhan, I can just fondle you with a hand or a mouth... Do you know, it’s not necessary?''
''No, get in, I want you to take me!''
Yibo obediently pushed his dick inside, Xiao Zhan moaned, bent, shut his eyes, covering with goosebumps all over his back.
''It hurts you, Zhan!'' Yibo got angry.
''No, don’t pull out!'' the guy insisted. ''Take me, Yibo, please, take me!''
His plea was desperate, on the verge of tears, and Wang Yibo felt as if Zhan started to miss him already though they didn’t part yet.
''Dummy,'' he whispered, embracing the man across his chest and trying to move as carefully as he could.
Gradually Xiao Zhan relaxed, started to moan, stroked[p] himself, shutting his eyes. Yibo wanted to get his hands away, he wanted to caress him by himself, but Zhan took his hand and put it on the neck instead. What? Did he like being asphyxiated? Yibo felt a little uneasy, he clutched his neck really carefully, being afraid to leave a bruise but even that was enough for Zhan to arouse so much. He was so hard and even started to move his hips for Yibo. The guy was stunned but didn’t stop, they were beating against each other, Yibo’s hips moves got more sweeping and Xiao Zhan cried out: ''Harder! Harder!''
Yibo thought that it was about his dick but Zhan put a hand on top of his on the thin neck and pressed Yibo’s fingers and at the same time – his neck.
''Fuck, Zhan!''
''Please, Yibo, harder, I’m coming now!''
Yibo’s mind floated somewhere. He hammered into Xiao Zhan as he was doing all that time but took away a hand from his neck, closing his mouth and pinching his nose with one hand. Then he wouldn’t have bruises, if he really wanted it like that... Xiao Zhan moaned loudly in frenzy, clinging on his hand and then came strongly on a bedsheet, twitching to every wave of orgasm that wasn’t letting him for about a minute.
But even the tastefully pulsating hole of Xiao Zhan couldn’t lead Yibo to release - he was overwhelmed so much. He let his lover loose and leaned back on the side, pulling out:
''What was that?''
Instead of clarifying Xiao Zhan turned to him and passionately pressed into Yibo’s lips, kissed him greedily and assertively, even a little hurtfully crushing his mouth.
''Zhan...'' Yibo was confused, pulled away just a little, having time to notice a dark flash in his eyes that went out fast and Xiao Zhan turned into himself. To be exact, into the usual version of himself.
He buried into Yibo’s chest like a kitten, started to caress his semi-fallen dick, making the boy aroused again and then led him to release. Only after that he asked, not lifting his face: ''Did I scare you?''
''Does asphyxiation arouse you?'' Wang Yibo answered a question with a question. It was a mess and a muddle in his head out of different emotions, having been experienced at the same time.
''It does,'' Zhan confessed.
At least some things had fallen into place. Well... It wasn’t so strange itself, Yibo just didn’t think that they would start experimenting in bed immediately. Or that was okay and there was just an inexperienced virgin speaking within him? Yibo kissed his hair: ''I just didn’t expect it. It’s okay.''
''Is something wrong with me?''
''No, it’s not that,'' Yibo kissed him fast again, showing Zhan that everything was as usual. ''Just next time let’s talk about it in advance when we want to try something? That's also about me, I’ll tell you first. Alright?''
The guy lifted grateful eyes and smiled completely innocently. How could he even do that?
Yibo kissed him again, trying to make a point and smooth over a little embarrassment, then he stretched and looked at his partner: ''Shower?''

Chapter Text

When they came to the repair shop of Tommy Suite it just so happened Xiao Zhan came into the room first and Wang Yibo was parking the car and turned off the ignition before following him. But just as Yibo stepped on the threshold he bumped into Xiao Zhan who didn’t go further for some reason and stuck at the enter listening intently.
''Zhan, what’s wrong?'' but Yibo fell silent himself, catching in the voices that reached them:
''...weirdos. Just look at his car and you’ll see it yourself, they’re nutters,'' the voice belonged to Tommy Suite.
Wang Yibo got insanely ashamed in front of Xiao Zhan who was listening to all that with locked teeth and in a suppressing silence.
''The guy himself would pass for normal if he didn’t wear that old stuff and if he didn’t have to ask for a leave from his sect just like a big baby,'' cheerful male guffaw in response.
Wang Yibo casted a fast glance at Xiao Zhan: the guy was pale, looked down at the floor and obviously felt awful.
Yibo decided not to tell him anything, just coughed loudly and went into the repair shop itself where Tommy was standing near the pickup with two more apprentices.
Their cackle broke abruptly as he entered. Yibo smiled at them as if nothing had happened, reaching into the pockets of his jeans.
''Hey, guys. What’s up? I’m here for the pickup.''
''Hi, Yibo,'' Tommy Suite gave him a forced smile. ''We were just discussing this strange pickup.''
''Were you able to find what’s wrong with it?'' Wang Yibo smiled politely though the men felt immediately that the atmosphere was tense.
''You mean, you want to know what else is wrong with it?'' one of the apprentices mocked.
''As if it’s not strange itself,'' another one mocked.
''Come on, lads,'' smiling wryly Yibo tried to politely show that he didn’t like their jokes, ''don’t you say that you’ve never seen prefabricated cars.''
''We’ve seen, ‘course,'' Tommy Suite opened the car's hood for him, ''but we’ve never seen a car that was assembled from shit. Honestly. The one who did it is a genius of course...''
Suite explained quickly to Yibo that some details wore out and the two of them he had to replace quickly, otherwise the car wouldn’t have started at all. That, frankly speaking, the insides of the car needed to be fully changed and, in conclusion, he said:
''I can’t imagine how your friend’s able to pilot this one around the state because this car hasn’t heard of vehicle inspection for 20 years so far. Honestly, the first cop should stop it.''
''Do you accept checks?'' Yibo changed the topic, showing that Tommy was crossing the border in his monologue.
The man sighed and went with him to a cash desk. Yibo paid for the repairs and new details himself, filled the tank with gasoline. He hoped already that he would take Zhan’s pickup without much noise but Tommy’s stupid apprentice decided to ask at the end:
''Listen, Yibo, that strange pal of yours - he is from the ranch El Rescate, isn’t he? Everyone can see it right away. Am I right?''
Yibo lifted angry eyes on him and spoke through his teeth: ''What are you talking about? I don’t get it.''
He took checks that Tommy had written out to him. On his way to the entrance door he heard a hollow sigh behind his back from one of the guys: ''Fucking fags.''
Yibo clenched teeth thinking for a second: should he walk away without saying anything or speak out? Finally he turned to the three but told just Tommy:
''If I were you I would tell my subordinates to hold their tongues, Tommy. You already lost two clients.''
He went out to the street to his Ford. Xiao Zhan, upset, was sitting in the passenger seat.
''Give me pickup keys,'' Yibo stretched an arm to him through the window.
''I still need to pay...''
''I’ve already paid. Just give me the keys.''
Xiao Zhan gave him the keys, Yibo returned to the repair shop. Apprentices tried not to look at him, Tommy Suite seemed to feel guilty and awkward for his subordinate’s foolishness, he was shifting from one foot to another in front of the pickup while Yibo was placing himself at the steering wheel and turned on the ignition.
''Yibo, no offense, I’ll talk to guys...''
''Do that, Tommy.''
''Come around, if anything. Next time I’ll give you a discount.''
''I’ll keep that in mind, Tommy. Bye.''
He drove down to the street, stopping next to his Ford, went out and sat with Zhan. The guy was pretty down on himself but spoke first:
''You didn’t have to pay for anything. There’re my problems, Yibo, I should’ve solved them by myself.''’
''I got checks for you,'' Yibo fished them out of the pocket and handed them to him.
''Thank you, Yibo, but really...'' Xiao Zhan took the papers and after having seen the sum his eyes got wide. ''Oh, God, so much! Yibo!''
''Come on, Zhan.''
''No, that’s too much! I must make it up to you!''
''Kiss me,'' the guy grinned.
''Yibo...''
''What? I’m serious.''
One of Suite’s guys went out to the street and looked at them intently: why didn’t they drive away?
Yibo didn’t mean ''kiss me right now'' but Zhan accepted his words like that. He turned to that man, licked lips and then desperately pressed Yibo's lips.
Wang Yibo didn’t expect that but understood right away. He demonstratively kissed Zhan in response and didn’t let him loose for a long time but that man was still staring as if he hadn’t seen anything like that before. When they lacked air they broke the kiss and Yibo gratefully breathed out: ''Zhan...''
''But I’ll give you the money back,'' he concluded stubbornly.
Suite’s apprentice spat down in front of his feet and went away.
''Sorry, I ran away like a coward,'' Zhan told him, lowering eyes. ''I just can’t stand it when they call us a sect. It just makes me mad...''
''Don’t pay attention to them,'' said Wang Yibo.
''Remember when you asked me if I ever wanted to leave the community?'' Zhan reminded. Yibo nodded. ''I did. But then I saw such behavior of the people from the side, people that even don’t know me and...''
Wang Yibo squeezed his hand.
''Hush, Zhan, you don’t have to, I see...''
''Sometimes all this world, we call it ''beyond the perimeter'', all this world seems to me... unreasonably cruel, as if there’s nothing here to leave our community for...''
''That’s not so, Zhan,'' Yibo objected very gently. ''For Anthony, probably, not. But there’s a lot of good, light, kind stuff in this world... And a bunch of nice people that don’t look at you through the prism of biases.''
Xiao Zhan breathed out and smiled at the end, squeezing his hand in response: ''You might be right, Yibo... In the end, you’re exactly this kind of person.''
He reached to the guy and kissed him short again, whispered to his air: ''I’m so grateful to God that I met you,'' he pulled away, his smile a little sad. ''I have to go now, Yibo.''
The guy nodded: ''Write to me when you get home, okay?''
Zhan smiled again, hesitated and finally answered: ''I’ll try.''

Xiao Zhan made contact in the evening, he wrote:
''I got home, Yibo, everything’s alright. Don’t know yet when we will be able to meet again. I’ll definitely write to you or come by your work as I did last time.''
And Wang Yibo already missed him. He didn’t want to change the bedding in his room, though he had to, because the bed smelled of sex and Xiao Zhan, his pine hair shampoo. The guy rubbed against the pillow, breathing in deeply and fell asleep, dreaming how he would take Xiao Zhan to the ocean.
He wrote him next day: ''Good morning, good-looking.''
Yibo knew Zhan wouldn’t answer before lunchtime so he was sitting still till afternoon. He came to work beginning his day as usual. But Xiao Zhan didn’t answer him at lunch time. The message was read but he got no answer. Zhan used the app 2 hours ago. Hmm, strange. But Yibo didn’t worry. He finished his working day and went home.
But even after 22:00 Xiao Zhan didn’t keep in touch. He didn’t enter the app.
''I’m a little worried. Are you alright?''
He was waiting for an answer till midnight and then fell asleep though.

His message remained unread in the morning.
''Good morning. I’m concerned about you a lot more. Write, please, the moment you see it. Anything, I don’t care. Just want to see that nothing happened to you.''
The day dragged slowly, Yibo almost didn’t let go of the phone. Although he understood that he would immediately notice when Zhan wrote something, he checked their chat every 10 minutes anyway.
Message unread. Xiao Zhan didn’t enter.

In the morning the situation didn’t change. Wang Yibo wrote him: ''Zhan, if you don’t answer me today, I’ll call. Really, whatever, I should know that you’re alright. I hope you just have problems with the Internet.''
He copied this message and sent it as a usual SMS just in case.
And all day he was thinking... wondering…
What could have happened? In fact, anything. To relieve the mess of theories and suggestions in his head he sat at work, having seized the moment when there was nobody in the store, and wrote on a piece of paper paragraph-by-paragraph:
1. Just problems with Internet and cellular service. Xiao Zhan couldn’t keep in touch so he just had to wait till he came to the store. Well, Xiao Zhan always ran back and forth on choir business and often did shopping for building materials. He would come any day.
2. Telephones were in truth forbidden in the community and Xiao Zhan lied to him[v]. Someone found out he had a phone. They took/broke it or he hid it so as not to be caught, so he still had to wait till his visit.
3. Someone found out about their relationships and Xiao Zhan was in trouble. That was the worst, and the most awful was that in this case Yibo had no idea what to do.
4. Xiao Zhan decided to break up with him. He didn’t even want to give it a thought, let alone write it out.
Thousand times he sorted out in his mind that evening, the night and the morning they’d spent together. It seemed to him that it had been ideal. It seemed to him Xiao Zhan had been happy too and had reciprocated for everything... What could’ve changed his feelings? Might he have done anything wrong? Might he have disappointed him at the end? Or might all that have been just because of those fools from the repair shop? What, what, what?
He buried face in hands and shouted out of helplessness, confusion and anger.
Then he tried to calm down.
In the evening, before he would call, he was really nervous. What if Xiao Zhan wouldn’t pick up the phone? And what if he would? That would be even worse if he would. That would mean that the man just didn’t want to talk to him. Something like that.
But a female voice came out of the phone speaker: ''The subscriber's phone is turned off or is outside the coverage area.''
That’s it... and what did he have to do then?

Wednesday came. Yibo felt somehow in a state of limbo because he was fully disoriented with Zhan’s disappearance. He was going to work down in the dumps but on Wednesday suddenly he got a call.
That was Xiao Zhan.
''Hello, Zhan?!'' everything within Yibo raised up, his heart rapidly sprinted, he greedily listened and he heard Xiao Zhan’s voice but that was completely surreal:
''Hello, Wenhan? Do you hear me?''
''What? Xiao Zh...''
''Good, listen: stop writing or calling me, please. Enough. Of course, thank you for helping me: you let me use your phone and gave a hand with pickup but stop bothering me all the time, you became obsessive. I’m not looking for a friend. Do you get it? Do you understand me?''
There was a tense silence, Wang Yibo was having hard time thinking, exhaled with insecurity, more intuitively: ''Okay. Sorry.''
''Good. You just didn’t get me right. We’re not friends. Goodbye, Wenhan.''
''Goodbye...''
And then there were phone beeps.

Wang Yibo lowered hands and sinked on the chair at the counter. What was that? What fucking hell was that?!
He wasn’t able to recover for a long time, he was absent-minded. Finally he called Old Sam and asked him to work till the closing hours, pleading feeling unwell. He really felt unwell, everything was hazy, blurred.
Only at home while he was lying in bed, recreating in his head their conversation, if that could be called one, he understood that Xiao Zhan was in trouble.
They’d found his phone – that’s a fact. Probably started to pry from where and why. Xiao Zhan had to tell them about him, about ''a friend'' that he made ''beyond the perimeter''. Why? Couldn’t he tell them that he’d bought the phone for himself? No, that’s illogical. Xiao Zhan wouldn’t need it just for himself. Probably they’d read their chat? So why did he call him Wenhan? Did Zhan try to protect him?
Yibo couldn’t fall asleep all night, wondering and rethinking all that till dawn. He didn’t have answers - only suggestions. He didn’t have a plan.
Having suffered all night, Wang Yibo decided for himself that if Xiao Zhan didn’t appear till the end of the week and didn’t make himself felt so he would do something.
What exactly Wang Yibo couldn’t tell.
He especially was waiting for the man on Friday, because Xiao Zhan was usually more or less free that exact day but he didn’t appear on Friday. Yibo’s phone remained silent, he was afraid to call or write to him again himself.
Bearing in mind that Xiao Zhan couldn’t have picked up the mirror on weekdays and had come for it only at the weekend, Wang Yibo begged Old Sam to give him a shift at the weekend. The man didn’t ask any questions, as usual, that’s what the guy was really grateful to him for.
But those two worked-out shifts didn’t give him anything. Xiao Zhan didn’t come, didn’t write and didn’t call. Moreover, Wang Yibo was sure that he had problems because of the phone or someone might have found out that Zhan had stayed for a night with him and not in the hotel as he told Kelly by phone. In general, he had to undertake something.
Wang Yibo started with official information. In Wikipedia and on other websites where this info was just copied there was written that ranch El Rescate was an eco-village that had an official status of a statistically isolated area as a unit of several communities. That meant that the settlement was fully legal, belonged to Doña Ana and lived by the laws of the state of New Mexico. On paper they did but how was that actually?
Yibo found a web-page (!!!) of the ranch El Rescate, to be exact the web-page of the community ''Children of Salvation'' that indicated the ranch as their legal address. Not if that page was really popular and appeared in the first row of results. And according to the design that was the creation of the 2000s and no one certainly worked with it or improved it and only God knew why it was even made. In fact, the page had some task. It told about the settlement, about John, the idea of community creation and what goal they all had. Yibo greedily read out all the information. Drawing general conclusions, the community ''Children of Salvation'' started to gather back in the 70s, around young and charismatic psychologist John L. Cole. The man was keen on yoga, spirituality and mediations and the first meeting of like-minded people took place in his flat. The general ideas of John were: 1. Civilisation had only a negative impact on health and people’s nervous system so they had to reject all the rubbish that bothered people on their way to live in harmony with themselves and nature. 2. For better focusing on themselves the psychologist Cole recommended to leave to suburbs, villages and even better to the wilderness.
A separate paragraph informed that the community ''Children of Salvation'' wasn’t against modern gadgets or other gifts of civilization but tried where possible to minimize their presence in life as ''useless''. However on the next page it was said that the community is provided with everything essential for life, that settlers didn’t need anything: they had several cars, kept a little household (goats, cows, chickens), they had a satellite tower that enabled them to use the Internet and mobile phones. The community also laid out water lines, had a well, and electricity. All that showed that they didn’t really avoid civilization and, in fact, kept up with times.
In a separate paragraph it was told how well they lived out of a big city. About their gatherings around fire, songs with a guitar, about their amateur instrumental group. Special attention was paid to a boys choir ''Nightingales'' - winners of various competitions in New Mexico and Texas.
Those articles contained copies of old photos made back in the 90s. Happy men and women in groups: they were sitting in a big hall that looked looked like Presbyterian Church hall, were smiling and applauding to something; here they were at the big fire, someone was toasting bread on a stick, someone was sitting with a guitar in hands; here was a boys choir - all of them wearing a similar uniform: black trousers, white shirts and black ties. Yibo was looking at the photo very attentively and it seemed to him that the boy in the first row was a really young Xiao Zhan. Under the photo there was a caption: Boys choir ''Nightingales'' under the guidance of Mrs. Mary Cole. Yibo remembered when Xiao Zhan wrote to him that John’s wife had been a founder of the choir. He peered into the woman: she wasn’t beautiful at all, average, so to speak, ordinary-looking. Curly blond hair, glasses on her nose, slightly overweight. But there was a feeling of warmth and kindness out of her looks. Then this woman delegated the guidance over the choir to the boy in the first row.
And, of course, the website was full of John’s photos of different ages. He was a really handsome man. Almost the model looks, tall, with broad shoulders, with right face features and expressive blue eyes. John had a wide, inviting Hollywood smile, Yibo immediately believed that in person this man obviously made a deep impression on people. In more fresh photos John Cole was an older and fully gray-haired man, with white neat beard and hair-style, he absolutely didn’t lose either his charm or breed.
Wang Yibo was long peering at him, biting lips. He remembered that episode with snake Xiao Zhan had told him about. He didn’t know why but he didn’t like John Cole. Though that feeling was irrational.
And when he searched for ''Community Children of Salvation'' on the Internet then, contrary to his expectations, he didn’t find any special information. There were just a couple of lines everywhere about eco-village, isolated community of like-minded people etc. And just a little group on Facebook under the name ''Rumors of Doña Ana'' where locals of Anthony, Chaparral and nearest towns spread rumors that ranch El Rescate was a refuge for cultists. That was a usual chat terbox with messages like: ''A cousin of my friend told me that this fucking sectants eat children and make a soap out of their bones as nazis in Germany'' or something. All those messages caused not terror but disgust, moreover not to the ''sectants'' but to the ones who wrote that.
That’s it. Yibo was digging through the Internet for a long time, trying to fish out of his depths something else but there was no other information possible to get. He wondered if he was a cop would he be able to find something illegal about this community?
After all, Wang Yibo didn’t get any answers. Moreover he didn’t get instructions on what to do further. He still had to decide by himself what he was going to do with all that stuff.
He was especially depressed with the feeling that Xiao Zhan had faced problems because of him and that he needed his help. Yibo didn’t know if he had convinced himself of that. Maybe that was his gut feeling? Maybe he just wanted that to be so? Because he missed Xiao Zhan, because he fell in love with him, because he couldn’t and didn’t want to accept that between them it was all over.
Well, if there hadn’t been all these oddities: that he’d called him Wenhan, and how he said about ''let me use your phone'', ''we’re not friends'' – all that was concerning. All that gave him reason to hope that everything was true between them, that Xiao Zhan just wanted to warn him and he couldn’t speak openly. If only he’d called him and said: Wang Yibo, I thought about that and understood that I don’t want to be with you, and moreover I don’t like you, stay away from me – then he would have taken his words seriously. Got upset, for sure, but stayed aside.
No, he wouldn’t.
Yibo suddenly realized that so clearly to himself. Clearly and simple. He wouldn’t. Even in the second case he would come to the ranch El Rescate and make Xiao Zhan repeat all that while looking him in the eyes. Because breaking up by phone was crap. Because he believed that his feelings were mutual, that everything was true between them, that Xiao Zhan wouldn’t abandon him so easily.
They’d just spent night together, Xiao Zhan’d given him the damn pie – people didn’t treat like that someone they’re going to break up with.
Then what was he doing there? Why wasn’t he already on his way to find out the truth?
Because Xiao Zhan got into trouble, that was as clear as day. Yibo would hardly have the opportunity to see him as he approached the ranch’s fence. Maybe they were keeping him somewhere under supervision and didn’t let out. Did Yibo really have to infiltrate into the community to get the opportunity to talk to Xiao Zhan again? It seemed so.
His throat got clenched with a thorny fear and at the same time he got feverishly excited. He would be like a cop undercover, wasn’t he aiming for that?
Of course, that was not a joke, he had to remember that reality was harsh. He would just ask to join them and if they turn him away from the fence as they’d done to Old Sam’s cousin then he would never have another opportunity to see Xiao Zhan. It meant that he shouldn't rush and had to think everything through before making such a risky step.
Wang Yibo firstly got some kind of plan. And even if that was dangerous and scary, he got better out of that, his limbo state disappeared. He had somewhere to aim, something to think about. He would cope with everything. He had to. Because Xiao Zhan was there. And he needed him.

Chapter Text

First thing Yibo decided to himself was that he wouldn’t tell anyone where he was heading and why. Firstly, because he was sure: once he opened his mouth and then he had to fend off the ones wishing to “save” him. And he actually wasn’t going to give a long visit to the ranch. Just the minimum necessary to see Xiao Zhan and to have a few words with him. He had to know the real state of affairs and if Xiao Zhan wanted to leave with him, he would take him from there. But he had to make it smoothly, without too much noise.
So he spoke to Wenhan and Pablo first. He had a legend for two: Yibo was going on vacation. He broke up with his boyfriend, needed to change the scenery, to be alone so he wanted to leave for Chicago for a month and that no one bothered him.
Wenhan accepted the news with sympathy: “Damh, bro, so sorry it didn’t work out between you two! Was your first time good at least?”
“That was excellent in this regard,” Yibo didn’t prevaricate. “He was just too strange.”
Wenhan didn’t seem to understand but nodded nevertheless and then specified: “So you are keeping this room or I’ll have to find another flatmate?”
“No,” Yibo told him confidently, “I’m coming back.”
Yibo left Wenhan a rent for the next month.
Pablo, having heard the news, got upset much more: “And who’s going to do your job all this time? Sam?”
Yibo felt awkward about his boss and said not confidently: “Pablo, you can find another worker if you want. There will be a lot willing to do this, I’m sure.”
“No way!” he said right away. “If you’re going to come back then I’m not looking for anyone else. I’m content with you and Mrs. Cruz adores you after all. Come back soon. Yibo, maybe two weeks would be enough for you to recover?”
“I wanted to visit my distant relatives,” Yibo smiled. “ I’m afraid I won’t be able to see all of them. A month, Pablo. I’m coming back, I swear.”
The man looked dejectedly but then finally patted his shoulder: “Okay. After all, you've been working here enough to ask for vacation. So be it a month, Yibo.”
“Thank you,” he replied sincerely. After all Pablo was just an ideal employer even despite his blabbering.
Old Sam squeezed in between them, said “hmm” and nodded Yibo to the entrance: “Shall we talk outside?”
Yibo nodded and hugged Pablo before going out of the store after Sam. The old man slowly went round the store, wandered to the smoking area. Yibo obediently followed, not hurrying him.
The man took a crumpled pack of “Camel” out of his pocket, twirled a cigarette in his fingers, looking at him sideways. After months of teamwork Yibo had already gotten used to Sam being a man of few words so he treated that respectfully when the old man was finally going to say something. But the man didn’t actually hurry. Dragged on, looking with narrowed eyes at the red horizon and then just killed Yibo out with one question: “Are you going to the ranch?”
Yibo’s soul fell somewhere down to his feet, thoughts stormed in his head: how did he guess? What had Yibo done wrong? Did Pablo know too? What was going on?
He didn’t want to avoid Old Sam’s question, moreover, Yibo was sure that the man wouldn’t dissuade him or forcibly lock him up in the back of the store, not letting anywhere. He just swallowed hard and asked in response: “How’d you know?”
“That tall Asian, he was from there, wasn’t he?” Sam said.
“Yeah, but we broke up...” Yibo was at the crossroads. Should he confess Sam all the truth or just get on bending the line with the legend about Chicago?
The man shrugged: “Maybe. But there are no relatives you are going to come by. Bullshit.”
He said that so firmly that Yibo was about to immediately give up. The guy wasn’t so sure in his campaign to get on insisting. Just asked quietly: “Have you been inside?”
Sam shaked his head not saying a word, fell silent, finished his cigarette. But he didn’t go anywhere, he obviously had something else to say. He spit to the side and asked not looking at the boy: “Do you know where I’d been before selling the store to Pablo?”
Yibo also silently shaked his head.
Sam reached to the collar of the T-shirt and fished out an army dog tag on a long chain: “Group “Mountain”, 10th Mountain Division. Took part in “Anaconda” operation.”
“Whoa...” Yibo pulled that respectfully. Went closer to Sam to examine the tag. The man even handed it to the guy, “I thought so, Sam, that you had been at war... People in the town are saying you have been in prison. Why don’t you say anything? You’re a hero!”
“I just followed orders and didn’t do anything heroic,” Sam shrugged and then took the chain off his neck. “Do you know what conventional sign we had when a fellow soldier was in trouble? He just tried to send his tag to the base somehow. When the one who brought the tag wasn’t its owner we understood that it’s bad news.”
And then he handed the dog tag to Yibo.
The guy stared blankly at Old Sam but the man just sighed and put it on his neck by himself.
“Sam!” the guy drew back out of surprise but the man said firmly: “When it gets bad, Yibo, try to find a way to send me this tag. Or you can return it by yourself when you’re back to work again.”
Wang Yibo was looking at the man silently. He didn’t know what to say. He was touched. Just felt the chain’s warm metal with his fingers, smiling: “Thank you, Sam. You didn’t have to but... thank you.”
The man just patted his shoulder and fished the last cigarette out of the pack, crumbling and throwing the pack into the dumpster. Yibo was a little bit embarrassed but he still didn’t expect such understanding and sympathy from Sam. Asked mirthlessly: “And what if I won’t come back? What kind of sign will it be?”
“The sign that you stayed there to live with them,” the man said, dragging on with pleasure. “Or that you died.”
The guy lifted a worried gaze on him: “Do you think it can walk to the extreme?”
“I don’t know,” said an old military man. “ I haven’t been there.”

Yibo called parents at the very last moment so he wouldn’t rethink for sure. Legend was the same: he wanted to go to Chicago, come back and estimate if he should move cities again. He promised to call mother every week as he had done before, or maybe even more often. Mother let him go with a light heart, she was happy instead that her son decided to unwind and escape from a boring life in Anthony.
Yibo decided to leave a Ford to Wenhan for now and to get to the community by public transport. Something prompted him that having an own car would be rather a negative factor there. He was waiting long at the stop for a bus that should take him to the settlement at the state outskirts in front of the endless desert. He was alone at the bus stop, he got bored, the phone bored him soon too and he still had to preserve the battery because he didn’t know where he would be able to charge it again. Out of idleness Yibo was looking at the old ads that were glued all over the stop.
Paper ads at the bus stop and on pillars were still popular in Anthony.
“Rent a flat for a long term. White man, alone. Phone number.”
“All kinds of plumbing work, company “Fuerte and sons”. Free diagnostic. Call!”
“Missing! Jessica-Ann Robinson, 16 y.o. Teenager left home and hasn’t come back. Is being looked for by her parents. If you saw her call the police or this number...”
“Happy pies of Mrs. Jovanni! There are discounts for school and university students. Pickup or delivery. Sweet, with meat, with exotic fillings.”
Yibo chuckled to this hilarious “exotic fillings” thinking what could it be: mushrooms? Spinach? Soy? For some reason, immediately, he shrilly wanted tacos from Mrs. Cruz, his stomach grumbled and he fished out a package of chips that he’d spared for the trip. Finally a bus came that took him to the final stop from where Yibo should go on foot several kilometers.
That was logical, actually: if you wanted to have an isolated community far from civilization, you had to reach as remote as possible. The guy just fixed backpack straps on his shoulders and set off, whistling something light on his way.
In three kilometers Yibo already regretted that he’d left his Ford. The hell knows maybe his decision wasn’t prudent but reckless?
In one more kilometer he ran out of drinking water. The sun mercilessly pressed on his head, backpack straps still rubbed harshly on his shoulders no matter how soft they were. It seemed to Yibo several times that he was going wrong, lost his way. Actually, he got off of any kind of road but then on the far distance a post appeared with a piece of wood nailed down to it: “Ranch El Rescate” was written on it and an arrow pointed confidently to the left. Yibo even chuckled: in horror films at this moment when a character turned in the pointed direction then wind twirled this wood and it started to point to absolutely another side that made viewers understand immediately that our character did not take the right path.
But that one was nailed firmly (Yibo’d checked), therefore he cheered up and walked faster, reaching the settlement already in 20 minutes.
That was obviously a huge territory, walled with a fence of bent metal sheets. He went straight to the main gate, as far as he understood. Just a big gate for cars and a small one – for people. There was not a soul around. And the silence was as if there was no one living behind the wall. A high fence hid a sign of any building inside. There was only an observation tower on the side. Yibo suddenly seemed awfully noisy to himself when he threw the backpack from his shoulders and went to the small gate. There were neither bells nor door knobs from the outer side. The ranch El Rescate didn’t clearly wait for strangers. Wang Yibo hesitated for a second and then, finally, knocked on the metal sheet of the door three times. His knocks echoed over the desert but nothing followed that. The village still remained silent and wasn’t going to welcome him.
What the fuck? thought Yibo, getting angry. It just couldn’t be that he came to the wrong place? But that long wall that spreaded to the left and to the right for several hundred meters was the only sign of the village around.
Then he just dropped the backpack, sat on it and started to wait.
Yibo thought that sooner or later the main gate would open to let out or in some car and then he would get inside. He had a suspicion actually that there was someone in the tower, watching all that. He almost felt his gaze on himself, casting glances to it constantly. He had sat like that for not less than an hour. Yibo thought, in general, that they were 3 but his watch steadily showed that they were just 1 hour and 8 minutes. If someone was watching him then there was a test of strength. They wanted to test his intention to get in, to see how determined he was. Well, he was much like that. More 49 minutes left. It was worse, especially without water. He got dazed out of heat, his head felt like a boiled cabbage. That is why he didn’t understand immediately when a small door in the wall opened and a man appeared.
He was dressed in “Zhan’s style” – black trousers, beige shed shirt with short sleeves, all that was old and over-laundered.
“Who are you?” he asked directly, not really welcoming. Yibo noticed a half-liter bottle in his hands.
“I want to live with you!” he recollected himself, getting on his feet. “Is that ranch El Rescate?”
“I asked – who are you?” the man's eyes were burrowing him unfriendly.
“I’m Yibo. Wang Yibo,” he said hastily.
“Go away, Wang Yibo,” he said, throwing him a bottle of water.
Yibo caught it but he didn’t want to give up.
“I want to see John! Can I see John and talk to him?”
But the man went back without words and closed the door behind himself.

They tried to turn him away, just like Old Sam’s cousin. That was definitely their tactic to not let casual idlers or just curious into the village. Just people who really wanted that, right? Good. Yibo really wanted that so he stubbornly sat back on his backpack, singing a song out loud:
There is a house in New Orleans
They call the Rising Sun
And it's been the ruin of many a poor boy
And God, I know I'm one. (1)
When the sun went down it started getting cold quickly. Yibo took out a zippy sports jacket. He had already finished all the food that he had, his stomach grumbled and he really wanted to go to the toilet. But where could he do that? He was in the middle of the desert, just like an eyesore. Shouldn’t he pee on the village’s wall?
Finally, the door opened again. The same man went out to him, he was looking at him as unfriendly as earlier but this time more with interest. Yibo stood up to him, the stranger was boring him with his eyes but kept silent, Yibo kept silent too. The guy didn’t understand what the man’s thorn gaze was trying to find in him. He knew that he wasn’t sincere and he should remain calm and totally open so they wouldn’t drop him off with a kick in the ass out of the slightest mistake or controversy. But most of all he couldn’t set Xiao Zhan up.
Their “staring” match finished and the man said through his teeth: “What are you trying to find here?”
“I don’t know,” said Yibo and then he started saying everything that popped up in his mind. “The truth. Myself. Inner peace. God? I don’t know.”
“Alright,” the man turned away and went back, waving his hand to him. “Go, it’s getting late. I can’t leave you here for the night.”

When Yibo went into “the perimeter” as Xiao Zhan could have probably said that, he started greedily looking around but, in fact, there was nothing special around him. That was an ordinary village, similar to typical American suburbs. Neat one or two-floor houses with low fences, gravel paths, there were even flower beds and garden pipes leading to them that sprayed water. Just like at the resort from some post-war movie. And no one was around, absolute silence. The man walked the path confidently, Yibo followed him, fixing a backpack on the shoulder.
“Where’re we going?” he asked after a few seconds. “To John?”
The man chuckled: “You’ll stay overnight in a guest house and the morning can go away.”
“But I don’t want to go away!” Yibo argued. “I want to stay with you! Can I see John and talk to him?”
The man stopped at the ordinary-looking gray little house, turned to him and said to Yibo really intensely: “Of course not!”
Wang Yibo startled out of his pressure. Damn, that was more difficult than he’d expected. Did he really have to fight for every inch to Xiao Zhan and that John?
They went into the house. It was damp and cold there, and as for accommodations – that was just like in a cheap hostel. The man led him to the main room-bedroom with two narrow beds[z] at the walls where another man was sitting. This man was kind of overweight strange guy with big bulging eyes, he hastily got on his feet as they came and gave them a bright smile: “William! Glad to see you, are you here for me?”
“No, Ron,” the man (okay, William) relented a bit, looking at the fat guy. “I got you a friend. He’s just like you.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful!” Ron stood up hastily from his place and approached them, caught Yibo’s hand and shaked energetically: “Nice to meet you, I’m Ron!”
“Wang Yibo,” he squeezed that from himself. Of course he’d expected his arrival at the ranch El Rescate a lot differently. And how? How’d he expected that? Yibo didn’t have a clear answer to this question.
“Ron, show him everything here. Maybe Wang Yibo will leave tomorrow,” William nodded at him and left, playing with keys in his hands.
Yibo was looking confusedly at Ron but the man was smiling to him very friendly: “Make yourself comfortable, Yibo. Did you arrive just today?”
“Yeah...” he placed his backpack on the unmade bed and looked around, feeling lost.
“I’ve been here for two weeks so far,” Ron looked at him a little proudly. “They don’t want to accept me yet but they still don’t kick me out. William is saying that he likes me, that I’m a good guy but I still have to learn so much!”
“Learn?”
“Sure! I’m learning a lot, I want to be of service for the community that I’m joining. Do you understand, Yibo?”
The guy nodded hesitantly.
“Maybe...”
“Look, Yibo, do you have some useful skills?”
“What?”
“Well, what did you do beyond the perimeter?”
Yibo noticed immediately that Ron was already speaking like “them” – and he’d been here just two weeks.
“I was just a seller in a store, Ron,” he replied.
“A seller?” Ron seemed to get upset a little. “I’m afraid you don’t have big chances, Yibo. Well, if you were, for example, a doctor or a builder-engineer then you could be useful here. These are useful skills and so chances to stay here would be bigger. Do you understand what I mean, Yibo?”
“Yes, Ron, I do,” the guy was looking at him thoughtfully. There was something wrong with this man: he was too hectic in his moves, words. Neurotic? “And what did you do, Ron?”
“Oh, my skills aren’t better either!” he pulled and sat on his bed in front of Yibo. “I am an art historian... But Rose says that I can retrain as a teacher of English and literature!”
“Rose?”
“Oh, yes, she is a nice woman! She comes to me sometimes and brings me some sweets from the kitchen... we’re talking a lot about God and John, and about what I’m looking for here... I think you'll meet her too.”
“Is it important that the community “Children of Salvation” understands the value of each of their members?” concluded Yibo.
“Sure,” the man nodded. “And, needless to say, you should prepare yourself for life here, resist temptations...”
“What temptations? Which ones are you talking about?” Yibo alerted.
“Which ones?” the man blinked his eyes and smiled. “That world, the world beyond the perimeter, Yibo, is full of various temptations... They make us lazy, unfree, they bind us to routine, comfort. Television, mobile phones, private cars, beautiful brand clothes, luxury food... All that is hanging on our soul not letting it get free. Do you see, Yibo?”
Of course, he did. The ideology of the eco-village that John’d founded his community on back in the 70s. The guy nodded and Ron continued:
“I really quickly cut out the phone, the Internet. I've never been attracted to beautiful clothes or TV shows either... But food... That’s the worst with food. But I’m coping. I’m fighting with myself every second! Sometimes Rose brings me something yummy but she always reminds me that my fight goes on. And I’m fighting.”
“Are they starving you here?” Yibo whispered quietly.
“Of course not!” he chuckled, waving a hand at him. “I see by myself that I have to defeat my food addiction. And when I become stronger than my passions then I’ll be worthy to be accepted in the community “Children of Salvation!” Rose tells me that it won’t take long.”
Fight your addictions, be useful, thought Yibo when, having talked a little more, they finally went to their beds, turning off a single dim light bulb. If that was a necessary path he needed to overcome to reach Xiao Zhan then he was ready to do that. Because the greatest addiction of Yibo was Xiao Zhan himself. And the guy wasn’t going to give up on him.

Chapter Text

Yibo woke up at 6 am because of the loudspeaker having started suddenly playing some orchestra march.
He almost fell from his bed out of surprise and woke up immediately.
“Invigorates, doesn’t it?” Ron laughed, he was already on his feet. “You’ll get used to it fast, Yibo. And, you know, to start a day with classical music is even healthy!”
Just like in a concentration camp, the guy thought and got up with difficulty, shaking off sleep.
They washed and Ron accompanied him to breakfast.
“Are we eating with community’s members?” Yibo asked hopefully.
“No, why are we? Separately, of course!” Ron confidently led him along the pathway to the end of some long one-floor building. Yibo would find out later that it was a communal dining.
“Why separately?” Yibo tried not to put pressure on Ron so as not to look suspicious but he really wondered why community members shut out from “newbies” so much.
“That’s because we don’t have the right for that now, of course!” the man said it as a self-evident thing. “Only after being accepted to a family can one eat with them at the same table. And you and I are just guests.”
“Isn’t it customary to let your guests sit with you at the same table?” Yibo argued but they just came to a small door at the end of the building and went into a small clean space with one table. The room was fenced with a screen and a thick curtain from the rest of the hall. There was a drive-through window in the wall. Ron almost sticked his head there and greeted:
“Hilda, good morning! I’m with a friend today! Let me introduce you, it’s Wang Yibo,” he said as he got out of the window to show him to a woman at the counter. Yibo saw just her hands – big and red, just like male’s, Ron blocked the view again. “Can you give us two portions?”
In a moment they were already sitting at the only table, covered with an oilcloth and Yibo was looking at the rice porridge in his bowl. It was liquid and seemed absolutely tasteless. Hell, are they feeding people here like that? Or just ones who hadn’t been accepted into the community yet? It was clear now why Zhan’s eyes had lit up when he had been talking about fast food…
But Yibo pounced on his breakfast anyway and ate it all because he had been hungry since yesterday. And it wasn't worth it to grimace at local food. It seemed to the guy that such a behavior won’t be appreciated here.
They came back to their guest house after breakfast and William came right away.
“Good morning!” Ron even blossomed when he saw him. Yibo thought that he looked like a cheerful puppy that was greeting his owner after work.
“Good morning, Ron. Did you sleep well?”
“Very good, William. Do you have news for me?”
“I do, Ron. Your colloquium is scheduled for the end of the week. Just some members of our community will talk to you in a free form, about everything, and then we’ll make our final decision. Don’t worry, Ron.”
“Oh, I’m so glad!” he smiled and casted a happy glance at Yibo. “I’m so glad, William!”
Then the man turned his sight to Yibo and raised a brow: “Well, Yibo, it’s time for you to go. Say good-bye to Ron. I’ll give you some water and food on the way.”
“No,” Yibo stood up from his place, getting worried. “William, I don’t want to go.”
They were looking at each other, judging by the man's face Yibo felt and understood that just his wish wasn’t enough and he had to offer something else. What did newcomers usually say in his place? What did they offer to William and the community? Their knowledge? Their special skills? Money? Their flats?
The guy bit his lips and said hastily:
“Ron told me yesterday that every member of the community should benefit it, right? You might doubt, will I be useful to you or not? I am really young, I haven’t studied in college and worked just as a seller in the store, right. There is no benefit from my knowledge. But I am keen on sport, and I’m quite hardy actually so if you need physical strength anywhere so I’m ready. Use me! I’m learning fast, I want to work for the good of the community!”
William gave him a hard look, put his hands behind back and nodded at the door.
“Let’s go talk.”
They went out of the little house and just wandered slowly along the pathway strewn with fine gravel, walking around the building.
“I see that you’re a stubborn guy, Yibo,” William said slowly and thoughtfully. “How’d you learn about us?”
Of course Yibo had expected such a question so he had already prepared and answer for it: “Found your website on the Internet.”
“On the Internet...” William exhaled in echo.
“But, sure, I’d known about John much longer ago!” the guy found what to say.
“Really? How did you know about him?”
“My parents told me,” said Yibo. “My mom and dad were just a little familiar with him, but they couldn’t join him because of... some family issues. But my father has always told about him with admiration.”
“Really?” William gave him a piercing, searching look. “ Where are your parents from?”
“They’re Chinese. China.”
“And when did your father meet John?”
He is testing me, flashed in Yibo’s mind and he started to shamelessly lie, relying on the facts he knew from Xiao Zhan.
“In the 90s. Can’t tell you the exact year. John visited China then.”
William nodded thoughtfully, examining him appreciatively. Specified: “What’re your parents' names?”
“Wang Yizhu and Lin Zi,” Yibo decided that it was better to tell the truth. It seemed to him somehow that the community could inquire on him if necessary.
“Hmm, well...” they made a full circle and came back to the guest house, William concluded, “So why do you need John? Why do you want to see him so much?”
“Why? But he’s... a legend,” Yibo flattered at his own risk, and William scepically chuckled but the guy decided to press on till the end. “He’s always been kinda rock star for my family.”
Yibo didn’t understand if William believed him or not. But he came into the house again, opened one of the cabinets in the common bedroom and took out a thin pamphlet from there that was long ago rubbed and erased by hundreds of hands: “Here, read this at your leisure time. We’ll talk later.”
The pamphlet was obviously a self-published one from the last century, printed still on the standard typewriter that had a letter “r” stood up a little bit to the top. On the cover it was written: John R. Cole, “Introduction for laborers’”.
When William went away, Ron congratulated him cheerfully: “Well done, Yibo! They gave you materials to study! That is a good sign!”

The book was kind of trashy, but, actually, didn’t have anything that Yibo didn’t know yet. The idea of eco-community, tub-thumping about refusing worldly fuss, propaganda of labor “for the public good” etc. But not that succinctly and laconic and instead spread over 50 pages.
Yibo understood that ideally he should have gotten inspired by the work of John Cole. All the efforts must have been aimed at that. But either he wasn’t accustomed to reading or John Cole wasn’t really a natural writer but Yibo constantly fell asleep and still hadn’t overcome the first chapter for a good 15 minutes. However, he forced himself to read the book to the end and ideally remember all the main points. He was sure they would test him on the read material under the pretense of friendly talk.
Interesting, what was William doing? Gathering information about him? Trying to find out who his father was, if he lived in China at the time John was traveling around the country? How well were the community ties developed? What information was available to them?
It was an undoubted advantage that Wang Yibo was just 20 years old. He hadn't really lived yet, his biography was crystal clear, he didn’t have skeletons in the closet. Well, except for Xiao Zhan. That was his biggest and main secret.
Yibo missed him. Especially here, within the walls of this place where he seemed to be so close to him. Awfully close and incredibly far at the same time.
Where are you, Xiao Zhan? What are you doing now? Are you thinking at least a bit about me?
“Yibo, Rose is coming!” Ron’s voice brought him out of his thoughts. The man saw a guest out of the window and beamed all over.
Yibo stood up and straightened his shirt. He heard steps and then a short but really overweight dark-skinned woman with a turban on her head came in. She smiled friendly and gave off vibes of hospitality and kind of universal love. Yibo immediately felt sympathetic to her although they didn’t even have time to get acquainted.
“Ron, hello, dear!” she had a cloth bag hanging on her shoulder, embroidered with beads, and she put her hand there right away and fished out a paper bundle, “I brought you something yummy.”
He clapped his hands, immediately unwrapped the bundle and gasped: “Honey buns! Mmm, Rose, is that all for me?”
“You can share it with Yibo,” she finally looked at him with her huge bottomless black eyes. “Your name’s Yibo, right?”
“Right,” he smiled at her sincerely. “And you are Rose?”
“I am, babe,” she smiled, showing her big white teeth. “Can you help me?”
“Of course, with pleasure. At what?”
“I like that you agree and only then ask,” she smiled and familiarly took his arm. “We’ll come back, Ron. Be good.”
“I’ll leave you one bun, Yibo,” he promised.
They went out into the fresh air and Rose accompanied him deeper into the village. Yibo was looking around with curiosity but he still didn’t see anything special: little houses, flower beds, trees, gravel paths. But this time there were different people that scurried back and forth. Yibo’s eye didn’t catch many of them: a girl in a light white dress with a basket in her hands, an old man in a blue overall who was planting something at one of the flower beds, a younger man who was carrying a wooden step ladder on his shoulder. All of them were looking at Yibo suspiciously but were smiling to Rose. She was smiling in return and waved to everyone, holding Yibo’s arm.
“Don’t get offended if I call you “babe”. I have a child your age. You all are like babies to me,” she said.
“That’s fine,” Yibo smiled at her, trying to casually still catch Xiao Zhan by chance, “You can call me whatever you want.”
“What does your mother call you?”
“As usual,” the guy shrugged, “As all moms call their sons: baby, dear, sunshine, sweetheart...”
“Baobei?” Rose asked suddenly and Yibo jerked involuntarily, turning to her. He didn’t expect she knew that Chinese word, “Does your mom call you like that?”
“Where do you know from?” Yibo was really startled.
“We have some Chinese in our community,” she smiled, “The second wife of John is Chinese, do you know?”
“Does he have two wives?” Wang Yibo even stopped out of such news.
“Of course not!” Rose laughed, throwing her head back. Meanwhile, they reached the small light house and came inside, “The first wife of John, Mary, died. He’s a widower. Then he married Zhou Lianjin.”
“Hmm, okay... where are we?”
“In our library.”
And really: that was not a big room but with high ceilings and shelves full of different literature along the walls.
“I need your help with this job I haven’t had a chance to do,” she smiled, “I need to sort out all the books. Worn ones – put aside for binding, look through to inspect for some bookmarks – people often forget about them. To wipe the dust – not difficult, as you can see, but monotonous. However, I’ll help you.”
Of course, Yibo understood right away that books were just an excuse to get hands busy while they were nicely having “heart-to-heart talk”. However, he’d already decided to be totally open and to tell about yourself just as much as not to give them a reason to catch him on something but not speak in monosyllables as if he didn’t want to make contact.
Firstly, Rose lightly questioned Yibo about him himself: who he was and wherefrom. He told her about his life in Chicago but didn’t mention that his parents moved cities and his father was working now at White Sands Range. He told her about school but not that he wanted to become a policeman. On the contrary, instead he said:
“I found myself at a crossroads after school... You know, Rose, how it is: all paths are opening up to you but you...”
“...have absolutely no idea which one to walk along?” she understandingly prompted, and the guy nodded gratefully.
“Exactly. That’s why I’ve come here. One of the reasons I want to see John.”
“Do you hope he can show you the way?” she clarified gently.
“Yeah, I do,” Yibo smiled nicely and put aside a worn book that needed binding.
He hoped to convince Rose and through her to entrench himself here. He probably succeed in that because she suddenly started speaking about different things:
“I saw on the bed a pamphlet “Introduction for laborers”, when I visited you.”
“Yes, William gave me that one to read.”
“Oh, that’s wonderful! Have you read much?”
“All.”
“All? So fast?”
“It’s not that big,” Yibo shrugged without going into details that it was moreover really dull.
“Well done, Yibo!” Rose said in such a tone that Yibo involuntarily felt pleased. “Do you want to discuss something from this book? Maybe, I can answer some of your questions?”
Yibo didn’t have any questions. That was already crystal clear and it was boring to talk about the book’s content but he understood that he had to show interest in John’s ideas that the community lived according to. He understood that Rose was waiting for a question from him so he decided to ask at least about something:
“Laborers” is a strange word. What does it particularly mean? It seems I didn’t get it.”
Rose began to explain that to him with pleasure. Yibo saw that clearly that it was really pleasing to her to enlighten him.
“That is from the word “labor”. All members of our community work a lot. Just thanks to our labor we’ve built this village and made it as you see it now. Labor for us is something important, fundamental, almost sacred. Therefore we think that everyone who wants to join us has to pass the labor initiation. Purifying with labor, if you like. Laborer is the first step in our inner hierarchy.”
“Do you have a hierarchy?”
“Just like in every society,” she smiled softly, “In the first step there are laborers. People that proved with their work, their strength and efforts the seriousness of their intentions. That they are ready to give away to society they’re joining and not just in words – they go through a formal ritual and are initiated into the Brothers. You can become our Brother – an equal member of our society, Yibo.”
“Then I’ll be able to see John?”
“Laborers can see John too. But you’ll definitely be able to talk to him, to get answers to all of your questions since you become our Brother.”
“Clear. What’s then? Is there any development further?”
Rose smiled widely, looking at him appreciatively.
“I’m glad that you have perspectives, Yibo. You’re an ambitious guy, aren’t you?”
“I don’t know,” he shrugged shyly and turned to the bookshelves.
“Anyway, afterwards there is just a happy life within our community and ordinary enjoyments of life,” she went to a mountain of thrown old books and started to put them in equal piles, “You can marry some good girl from our Sisters, you’ll have children... like everyone.”
Yibo wanted to say “good” but that word stuck in his throat. Too generalized picture as if happiness was the same for everybody and not individual.
What if I didn’t want to marry any nice, kind girl? What if I wanted your Brother Xiao Zhan?
But Yibo understood, felt that he shouldn’t raise a question about the community’s view on LGBTQ+, that was stupid and even dangerous. But Rose didn’t feel that setback, she continued:
“Brothers that have proved their loyalty to the community with their work are engaged in more and more tasks over the years. John always sees who’s ready to take up more responsibilities, who can be a good manager or mentor for other people, for example. We have a special honor for such members of the community.”
“Are you a mentor for others, Rose?” he just asked, giving her a side gaze.
The woman freezed and then laughed:
“You’re very observant, Yibo, and, it’s clear, you’re a smart boy. Yeah, I’m something of an ideological mentor... I help newcomers like you to understand what’s the matter with them. Why did they come to us? And I try to understand if we really can help this person or they just need to go to a psychologist.”
“And what can you say?” Yibo got down from the stepladder he’d stood on, and shook his hands from book dust. “Do I need to go to a psychologist or have I come to the right place?”
Rose smiled even coquettishly, said: “I don’t know, Yibo. The time tells.”
“And how much time do you need?” he showed impatience but bit his tongue immediately, regretting his hasty question.
Rose shrugged: “Depends on how you learn, Yibo, on how eager you are, it’s different for everyone. Ron has been in the waiting area for two weeks already.”
"I don’t want to wait for so long,” he confessed quietly and sat next to the woman, looking her in the eyes. “Help me, Rose. Show me the right way. What do I need to get the chance to show you all that I can be a worthy member of your society as soon as possible?”
She was giving him a serious look, evaluating. At that moment her looks was just likes William’s yesterday:
“Ron might have already told you how we view ideally a future member of our community: engaged, ready to bring benefits, work a lot for the good of our community, ready to leave life beyond the perimeter behind. And that world as well.”
“What does that mean?”
“People who live here don’t want to go back there, see, Yibo? We all have chosen this path voluntarily. Everyone who came to the community like you, no one was forced. And we too, as you see, are not ready to accept everyone.”
“I am ready to forget my life and world beyond the perimeter,” Yibo promised feverishly but he saw in Rose’s eyes that she didn’t believe him:
“In words you are, but you still have to show that in practice,” the woman pursed her lips. “Not everyone is able to bear the rules of our settlement. People beyond the perimeter, especially the young generation, are very spoiled.”
“What rules do you mean?”
“Only a few basic rules will concern you now. You’ll know them along the way. For example, about our life schedule in the community, that our Internet access is restricted, about restraint in entertainment and modesty in behavior. We’re an eco-settlement, first and foremost, Yibo. As you can see we still use the benefits of civilization: we have water supply that helps our gardens grow, and a satellite tower that enables us to use a phone but... we are doing our best to minimize this necessary communication with civilization, do you see?”
Yibo nodded hesitantly but there was a question in his head: were mobile phones forbidden here? The answer would make a lot of things clear to him. But he asked instead:
“How much do I have to minimize?”
“As much as you can,” she said seriously and looked him in the eyes. “Would you be able, Yibo?”
“I’ll try,” he responded but for some reason he felt his throat tightened and dried. Everything started to seem more serious to Yibo than previously but it was too early to retreat. He had at least to see Zhan once and for that he had to leave this waiting area and become a laborer, to get an access deeper into the village where he had a chance to encounter him.
Anyway, he had to try his best to overcome these stages as fast as possible. He didn’t have much spare time, his vacation would finish and he had to fit in a month.

Chapter Text

Yibo came to the community “Children of Salvation” on Tuesday, on Wednesday he got a book from William and got acquainted with Rose. Nobody had bothered Ron and him after that and they were left to their own devices. They were waking up to the lively classical march (now Yibo didn’t get startled, at least), were heading to have breakfast in the guest dining, fenced from the common one. Yibo heard voices of the rest of the community behind the shield and a curtain, they were talking cheerfully, mostly male’s for some reason. He strained his ears, trying to hear something important or to catch Xiao Zhan’s voice but he was able to do neither one thing, nor the other.
They were fed disgustingly. Liquid tasteless porridge for breakfast, vegetables for lunch, a little salad and something like a milk yogurt for dinner – that was their food ration. Yibo didn’t eat enough, he was always semi-hungry and, moreover, he wanted meat so badly. Now the image of Xiao Zhan in his sweet dreams alternated with the image of a well-roasted steak Ribeye and he woke up with a boner and a watering mouth.
He also badly wanted to have sex. Fortunately, they had a private bathroom combined with a shower so he even jerked off a couple of times secretly from Ron. To tell the truth Yibo was sure that they didn’t appreciate hand jobs in the community. No one told him that directly but, of course, things like that were on the surface. People who restricted themselves in simple stuff just couldn’t be free in terms of sex because this sphere of life was the first to get kept under control in any religious organizations and communities.
Speaking of religion, by the way, Yibo still didn’t understand. Nobody tried to question him on the topic of faith or somehow put a pressure on him in this regard. The guy doubted if the community had any religion, church or a cult. What did they believe in? Something prompted him that he would find out further. And now what? Didn’t they want to scare him? Didn’t they want to alienate him from the community?
In any case, after breakfast, lunch and dinner the men went back to their guest house and were shut upon themselves and their lingering expectation. Ron studied “Introduction for laborers” all over again, commenting: “I’ve read it already for the eighteenth time and always find something new for myself!”
Yibo gave him a skeptical smile but he took up reading it the second or the third time too because he was afraid to use his phone, trying to preserve the battery. He only called mom once to say that he “had successfully landed in Chicago” and a message to Sam: “Got there safely. It’s alright now.” Sometimes they announced something through the loudspeakers: “Today at 7pm in the assembly hall there is a meeting on the topic of budget allocations for the next year. All involved are requested to be on time and not to be late.” or “Orchestra rehearsal is rescheduled from 5pm to 6pm” and so on.
Ron sighed with anticipation in such moments:
“I wish I could take part in community’s life! It is so interesting to learn everything, to try everything! I would gladly start teaching local children. I heard there’s a boys choir “Nightingales” here – it would be so interesting to listen to them!”
“Yeah, I would like to listen too...” Yibo responded sadly, trying to imagine their encounter with Xiao Zhan.
What would it be like? Would they run into each other on one of the gravel paths? Or would they meet in the library? Or in the common dining? Maybe he would have to get transferred from laborer to Brother – only after that was he able to have a word with him? His heart began to sadly and sometimes even cowardly ache, but he took that up sharply each time and told to himself in his mind:
Turn around and go away if you consider this plan fatal and a complete failure. That’s why they are keeping you in the waiting area: so that you could change your mind. They give you a chance to turn back. But after that you have to forget about Xiao Zhan and your feelings for him. And don’t even think that he probably needed your help and you were too lazy, just got scared and went away – even before you had to sacrifice something. Go away if Xiao Zhan doesn’t mean enough to you.
And he stayed. Time after time.

He really wanted steak Ribeye. Big N’ Tasty and a coke, fried wings and French fries, and a big tub of pistachio ice cream.
And also play “League Of Legends” or just casually watch some YouTube videos, or even to just talk to Wenhan by phone would be great.
And he would listen again to the Maneskin album and to his favorite old guys The Animals, Aerosmith and younger guys like Decalifornia and IMAX. He especially missed music.
And he missed Xiao Zhan so badly: his voice, his lips, tongue, hands. Yibo became aroused permanently when he remembered the night they’d had, about almost twenty-four hours of pure happiness that they had been able to snatch. It was warmer this way, it was easier to believe that it wasn’t yet over between them. Yibo would definitely see Xiao Zhan and dig out the truth, and understand what they had to do next. There would definitely be the way out, he believed in that.
On Thursday evening William and Rose came to visit them, individually and not for a long time. William told Ron:
“Tomorrow, Ron.”
And the man beamed all over, responding with awe: “I’ve been ready for a long time.”
Then the first man shifted gaze to Yibo: “Are you bored, Yibo?”
“No,” he lied shamelessly, “Vice versa, I’ve got much time to think. But I’ve reread “Introduction” numerous times. Can I use your library?”
William sarcastically arched the brow and told him: “I’ll convey your words to Rose. She might bring you something else.”
Rose came several hours later. She wished Ron luck and gave Yibo a new book: John R. Cole, “The Brotherhood of the community “Children of Salvation.” What is our power?”
This work of John was six times bigger than the pamphlet of the “Introduction” and Yibo involuntarily regretted asking for a new reading material. But, of course, he thanked Rose.
That evening Ron couldn’t fall asleep, he was tossing and turning and dreaming out loudly what a beautiful life was going to begin for him since tomorrow. Yibo was listening to him silently, wistfully thinking about what an awful life he must have had before so that he was dreaming about the community with such enthusiasm.
“Why did you come here, Ron? What made you do that?”
Ron became serious at these words. His usual excitement dissolved for some reason, light went out of his eyes and he just told Yibo:
“It’s so difficult to live in that world sometimes, Yibo... There are rules beyond the perimeter but no one follows them. People somehow go from simple to complex things, always chase something that doesn’t really make sense. And here, Yibo, I know, I feel that it’s only you and the desert. Honest and simple relationships.”
And no comments followed. Yibo was just looking at the man, thinking about his words. He hadn’t thought before that moment that it could be really good for someone to live in the community. And, maybe, it was really good for Zhan. What if?
But he immediately drove these thoughts away: Zhan said he’d thought about leaving the community. He’d wanted that even before meeting Yibo. And, if he still wanted that, they would do that together.
On Friday William came for Ron after breakfast and took him off to the interview. In three hours Rose came into the guest house: “Yibo, help me take away Ron’s belongings. He’s moving to a Laborer's house.”
Wang Yibo stood up from his place, specifying: “And where is Ron?”
“He’s still talking to the men,” she smiled softly, fishing out Ron’s suitcase from under the bed, “Let’s collect everything, I’ll take it there by myself.”
“And can I see him and... congratulate?” Yibo was vaguely worried for some reason.
“Yes, maybe, in a couple of days. Ron’s head is going to be spinning now out of all the changes, let him adjust. Which toothbrush is his?”
“The blue one. Alright, Rose, and... what about me? When am I going to...”
"Yibo, babe, I’m coming by the other day and we’ll discuss it, I swear,” she closed Ron’s suitcase quickly and business-like, pulling out the luggage handle, “I’m in such a rush now. Spare more questions and then you’ll ask me all of them at once.”
The woman left the guest house hastily, leaving Yibo alone with his questions.
But Rose didn’t come the next day. And after the next day too.
Yibo started feeling uneasy alone in the guest house. He was still going to the dining for breakfast, lunch and supper, was trying to communicate with red-handed Hilda behind the counter, but she was silently pushing plates to him and seemed to not even hear his questions. His phone charge inevitably streamed to zero percent and the guy tried to use the last ones to call his mom once again:
“Yibo, baobao, I miss you so much!” he heard her dear voice, “It’s so good you called. I was thinking about you for the whole day! Are you alright?”
Wang Yibo suddenly wanted to cry badly. He struggled to restrain his emotions, trying not the let his voice tremble: “It’s okay, mom. I’m relaxing. Spending a lot of time outside, reading. It’s alright.”
“I hope you don’t spend every night in a gay club?”
Yibo chuckled involuntarily: “No, mom, I swear. No gay clubs.”
“Don’t get me wrong, son, there’s a lot of alcohol and drugs there. Just be careful.”
“I will, mom, I promise.”
Well, Yibo didn’t even lie. He was going to be absolutely careful in everything because he didn’t know by himself what awaited him.
When his mom hung up, Yibo was going to send a message to Sam but his phone couldn’t take it anymore. He beeped farewell and died out, remaining a useless stuff in Yibo’s hands.
Only that minute did the guy feel that he was cut off from the town and civilization. And it really scared him. Some desperate weakness captured him. Yibo dashed outside trying to find at least someone.
That someone turned out to be a gardener, taking care of flower beds.
“Excuse me, sir...” Yibo broke off when he saw an absolutely unfriendly glare. “Can you tell me where I can find Rose? I need to talk to her.”
The man eyed him heavily and said through his teeth, not worse than William: “Are you from the waiting area?” that sounded like “have you got out of the trash bin?” Yibo momentarily felt that he was a third-class person, he said with embarrassment:
“Yeah, I’m from the guest house.”
“Rose will come when she has time,” was the answer.
The man wanted to get back to his work immediately but Yibo decided to take a desperate risk: “Can you probably tell me where I can charge my phone? There’s no power socket in the guest house.”
The guy was given such an indignant glare that he even recoiled: “This’s the eco-village,” cold in man’s words got to his bones. “We’ve chosen life without power sockets. When it doesn’t come to your taste, maybe you've come to the wrong place?”
Least of all Yibo wanted to mess with this man and he also didn’t want to seem an upstart since the first days. So he squeezed from himself: “Sorry for bothering you,” and retreated to the house, intending to ask only Rose about such things.
Rose came on Monday.
Yibo dashed to her with such a joy, like to a very close person: “I was waiting for you, Rose! Where’ve you been? How’s Ron?”
She looked so tired already, as if she’d had a very tough morning. She sat on a chair and asked for some water. Yibo handed her water in a tin mug, having poured that from a tap in the bathroom.
“Sorry, babe, I was too busy these days, including Ron’s business. He’s settled just right and is asking about you. He’s waiting for you.”
“I’d love to join him!” Yibo supported that feverishly. “When will it be possible to schedule my interview?”
“The point is not in the interview,” she clarified. “The point is within you yourself. We would gladly accept you in our society, Yibo, when you’re really ready for that.”
“I am!” escaped from his lips before he managed to think over his words but after that the guy remembered that he’d wanted to ask Rose about power sockets and where he could charge his phone. Now it was very uncomfortable to ask about such things. But there were his parents in Chaparral who didn’t know where their son had set off and were waiting for him to call.
Rose, watching changes in his face expressions, noted delicately:
“I guess you're not really ready, Yibo. It seems, you still have something from that world that holds on you tightly.”
Yibo was really embarrassed. She placed hands on her stomach and lifted eyes. Said insinuatingly: “All of us once had or still have an “anchor” from the outer world that drags us there. Passions that don’t let us develop as individuals. For Rons that’s food. For me that’s my son.”
Yibo raised his eyes at her in surprise and she confirmed mirthlessly: “Yes, babe. My son is living with his father beyond the perimeter. And I’m fighting against the temptation to call him every day.”
“But...” Yibo was at a loss what to say, “Why isn’t he here?”
“Because he wanted to stay there,” was the answer.
Yibo was a little bit confused and worried – and all that was under the sight of Rose’s black eyes that were watching his inner battle calmly and perceptively.
“And why... why don’t you want to call him?”
“Because life beyond the perimeter should remain beyond the perimeter. That’s the crucial thing you should understand now. You should come to our society pure, renewed. No past, no attachments, all your mistakes, fears, doubts – behind. So and so only can you get here what you want. Only so will John be able to teach you something.”
Her voice, soft and warm, infiltrated into Yibo, enveloped him and calmed. Rose’s words suddenly seemed somehow... logical, clear. She went on:
“I know what your biggest attachment is in that world. Tell me, Yibo. I know you recently asked this question of one of our Brothers.”
Wang Yibo suddenly felt embarrassed and confused for some reason. He didn’t want to look at Rose, he even turned away from her direct glance. His ears blushed.
“Yes, I asked where I could... charge my phone,” he said with difficulty and immediately felt how the woman encouragingly squeezed his arm just above his wrist.
“Good, Yibo. It is so important to be honest. First and foremost, to yourself, right? Why do you need the phone?”
“To call,” he voice became weak and husky, he had to cough two times, “to call my parents.”
“Do your parents know that you’re here?” with a profound tone.
And then Yibo understood that he was caught. On his own lie. Easy and simple. If he said “no”, that would be really strange because why hadn’t he said he was going to the legendary John if his father had told so much about him? If he said “yes” so why did he need to call them if they perfectly knew where their son was and what rules the community had? Caught. So silly and quick.
Yibo looked down and breathed heavily as if he’d been running. Rose looked at him, not averting her eyes. He felt naked in front of her as if she was able to read him like a book.
“Rose, I’m sorry...” his whisper rustled and his fingers twitched out of nervousness. “I lied to you.”
“At what, Yibo?” he heard her as though her voice was coming from far away.
“My parents have never met John. They don’t know where I am.”
He sheepishly lifted his eyes at her, Rose was looking at him silently, waiting for the rest.
“I learned about your community on the Internet,” he went on, licking his dried lips. “I was just looking for something on topic: meaning of life, joy of life – I don’t remember... I don’t remember how I found you. John. I found John. And I wanted to meet him so badly. That’s it. I came here. That’s so silly. Maybe even stupid...”
“Hush, hush, baobao,” a gentle whisper and warm squeezing of her hand on his shoulders. “You are a good boy. So good! Open, sincere, honest boy. That’s alright, Yibo, now it’s alright. That’s good you told me. Now look at me.”
She carefully raised his face, taking him under the chin, and the guy surprisingly understood that his eyes were moist. Rose’s sight was warmer now, affectionate and understanding: “Now I see that you’re really ready, Yibo. Now I see it.”
She embraced him in a warm soft hug.

That night, after Rose had gone away, Yibo spreaded on the bed with no strength left, looking at the ceiling. He was completely wiped out. And he was also trembling out of some emotional “hungover” as though he had been through stress. Or maybe had really been through it. It seemed to Yibo that in that conversation with Rose he’d been walking on thin ice. He admitted that she could really affect him with her voice, her words, those touches…
Damn... Damn hell…
Now the true scale of what he faced started to take its form in front of him. That’s a sect. Fucking sect, not a damn eco-village. And had Xiao Zhan been raised in such conditions of control and emotional pressure? O Lord…
Yibo couldn’t calm down. He was tossing and turning, thinking about his further plan of action. Not knowing what was awaiting him, he decided that the most sensible plan was to hunker down and watch. To be invisible, inconspicuous, ordinary, as much as he could. And, probably, he had to reveal himself in front of them. Not completely, of course, but enough for them to believe that he was fully exposed.
That meant that he had to hide Xiao Zhan as deep in the corner of his soul as possible. Was he able to do that? Would he be able to keep balance further on that thin border of truth and concealing?
To hold on until at least his first meeting with Xiao Zhan. No. To hold on until their escape.
Wang Yibo was sure that escape would be necessary. He was of no particular value for the community but Xiao Zhan, sure, was a person that they would grip on and wouldn’t let go just like that.

The next day after breakfast William came for him.
Yibo had guessed intuitively that today, after that conversation with Rose, someone would come for him.
The man stood in the doorway, put hands across his chest and looked at him silently, expecting, probably, that the guy would say something or somehow greet him. But he was silent too and lowered his head. Finally, William was the first to say a word:
“Rose thinks, you are ready.”
Yibo raised a calm, clear sight on him: “And what do you think?”
A wooden toothpick stuck out of William’s mouth. He chewed it, thoughtfully staring at Yibo. At the end, he said: “I don’t know. We’ll see. Get ready: I’ll come for you after lunch.”
And Wang Yibo was getting ready. Being nervous he reread “Introduction” once again, thinking and estimating what questions they could ask him. Next day, on Wednesday, he was strangely nervous, after the lunch – even more. But William didn’t let him down, he came at the agreed time and just nodded shortly: “Let’s go.”
Yibo followed him. The men left the guest house and set off deep into the village, went past the common dining and the library, where Yibo had already been. They turned to the one-floor gray building. Yibo noticed that no house had any signboards. As if locals already knew without prompting where things were and strangers wouldn’t poke their noses into it?
One-floor building turned out to be a warehouse that wasn’t used or, maybe, was not used often. Half of the room was shielded with a big curtain that was bent at one angle where some chairs piled on top of each other, a corner of a couch and some old frames stuck out. Against the background of the curtain was a long table for four places, and in front of them – a lonely chair. As if at some matriculation. No, at the job interview. No, at the interrogation.
Yibo hesitantly shifted from on foot to another. There were three unfamiliar men and one woman sitting at the table. The woman was Asian, and, most likely, Chinese. John’s wife? The four were emotionlessly and coldly looking at him, and the guy felt more uneasy. He barely understood why he was worried so much.
As Yibo explained to himself lately, he was worried for a successful outcome of the case, because till that moment he had already done a lot for it. He’d taken a vacation, cleared with his parents and arrived incognita at the community “Children of Salvation” to see his beloved one. He’d lived for a week in a guest house, had read their books, had had their disgusting food, had barely endured that confession talk with Rose – all that in the sake of the moment where four unfamiliar people would decide if he was worth being accepted to them for “probation” as a laborer.
Rose appeared somewhere from the side. Placed a warm hand on his shoulder, squeezing, and whispered:
“Sit on a chair and just answer their questions. Nothing difficult, dear, don’t worry. I’ll be here, Yibo, just behind you.”
At that moment he was really grateful to her for her support.
“Hello, Yibo,” one of the men told him when he sat in the center of the room, “We’re ones from this village’s first founders. Today we just want to talk to you to decide if we are ready to invite you to stay with us.”
“Hello,” he responded, immediately feeling that his throat dried up.
“Tell us about yourself, for a start,” asked another man. “How did you find us?”
Yibo told them. That exact version Rose had heard the day before yesterday. Then they talked about what he basically looked for in life and what he wanted to get from John. Then they discussed the book “Introduction for laborers” and how he understood it. Then the woman in the committee (“admission board” as Yibo named them to himself ) let him ask questions too.
By that moment Yibo had already had no questions. He was mentally exhausted from all that talk and just wanted that to finish as soon as possible. He wanted to drink badly. He sighed and said wearily:
“I don’t really like asking questions. I like listening more,” a semblance of disappointment flashed through the woman’s eyes and Yibo added, “but now I have something to say on my behalf. If you let me.”
“Say, of course,” the woman smiled at him.
Yibo recollected his thoughts, fidgeting on the chair. He’d rehearsed that speech while lying in bed alone in the guest house. He knew he had to give them a little more than just matter-of-fact answers. Only then would he seem convincing.
“You know, when I just came here I’d self-confidently guessed that just my wish, or obstinacy and stubbornness would be enough for... for everything. I didn’t see the point in keeping Ron and me in that guest house. “Introduction for laborers” seemed dull to me. I rushed, resisted everything that I faced, not understanding what all of that was for, why I was kept in the waiting area. But then... just a couple of days ago it seems I understood that. Of course, Rose helped me to understand. We spoke a lot with her and I suddenly realized how much I was... that I just didn’t know anything and didn’t understand first and foremost about myself. How can I claim if I’m ready to join your society or not, when I’ve never faced difficulties? I have stopped being a teenager just recently. What is there really to say?! When I just came here I was sure that I was worthy to meet John, that I was ready to become a member of your society and now I say: I don’t know if I am ready or not. Only time and challenges will help me understand it myself. Help me understand who I am and what I am worth. And, if I am worthy, I’ll patiently wait for it. That’s it... That’s it.”
All the men were smiling at him but most of all that woman. She said very gently: “Wait outside with William, okay? It won’t take us long to respond.”
Yibo just stood up and went towards the door. Rose affectionately touched his cheek, keeping a hand under it, and then closed a door behind them.
The sun was still shining outside, William and him went two steps away from the building, silently waiting till the moment the committee finished their counsel. The man was looking at him sideways but they didn’t talk. Yibo observed some bush and a neat curb made of white painted bricks’. Minutes hanged heavily. Yibo just wanted to lay down and not to think about anything today. Well, maybe, drink a glass of cold water before that. Finally, the door of the house opened and happy Rose went out to them. She cupped Yibo’s face in her hands, gave him a big wet forehead kiss and then hugged: “That’s alright, babe, they said you can become our laborer. I’m so proud of you! I am so happy for you! I’ve not even doubted you!”
Yibo somehow relaxed internally and beamed with a relieved smile. He saw William over Rose’s shoulder, the man smiled at him for the first time and nodded. The guy shortly closed his eyes to live through this moment and Rose carried on:
“Now go with William. He’ll see you off to Ron at the house of laborers. Everything will be fine, babe. I’ll come to you after breakfast.”
The guy nodded to her without saying anything and headed after the man.

He didn’t look where he was going, didn’t memorize the way. He would have enough time to learn the settlement’s geography, to find out where was what and how to escape. Waiting area took him a week. Well, that wasn’t really bad. He had at least three more to meet Xiao Zhan and to get out of here.
William and him went into some warehouse. The room was relatively small. A short man in glasses, with receding hair, met them.
“Hi, William. Have you brought the newbie?”
“Yes, Issac. Give us all that’s necessary.”
The man went into the depths of the warehouse and came back with a rolled mattress, a pillow and a thin blanket above. On the second set he brought neatly stacked bed linen and faded washed pajamas.
“Is your size seventeen? (1)?” the storekeeper asked, squinting.
“Yes,” he nodded.
“Sharp eye, Isaac,” William smiled at him.
“That’s the experience,” the man responded and took out of the counter a paper bag and with clear, precise movements started to put there:
“A towel, a soap, a single-used razor, a washcloth. A change of socks and underwear, a comb, a toothbrush.”
“I have all of that!” Yibo turned to William.
The man waved him off, signed in Isaac’s books, took a paper bag and put the mattress and the rest of things in Yibo’s hands so that the guy wasn’t even able to see where they were going.
When they went further, the man clarified:
“We tried to barrier from civilization as much as possible, but, of course, we buy a lot from beyond the perimeter. Personal hygiene means, clothes and so on. We don’t produce anything ourselves, after all. So to keep the focus on our community and not on the things, we have decided to use what is given to us within the community. It eliminates the unwanted attention to unusual things that get into the community with newcomers. It also prevents possible jealousy. Well, what difference does it make what toothbrush you use? Yours or the one you’re given here?”
If the point is in the toothbrush then, of course, it makes no difference, thought Yibo. Anyway, he really doubted that it was limited to a toothbrush.
But he was already so whipped-out that he had no wish to argue with William. He needed rest. And sleep well, finally. And then he would talk to Rose, or William, at worst. But not now.
They approached a one-floor long building of gray color and William held a door for Yibo when he was squeezing in with his mattress and all the rest into the doorway. Before he could put all that pile down at his feet he heard a cheerful shout and saw Ron who embraced him in a hug immediately:
“Wang Yibo! I knew you would make it! And knew that you wouldn't be stuck there for as long as me!”
He saw Ron and twenty more pairs of strangers’ eyes that were watching him from their beds. They were bunk beds and they placed one in front of another in two rows as in barracks. Was he going to live here like that? Damn…
“Welcome to the house of laborers, Yibo,” William smiled at him.

Chapter Text

“I saved you a place, Yibo!” Ron picked up his mattress and led the guy to his bed (correction, their bed since the beds here were bunk ones). “I have occupied the lower bed so far but if you don’t want to sleep in the upper one you can occupy mine...”
“No, Ron, that’s okay...” Yibo gazed at the other men who were still silently watching him.
“Lads, Yibo is a good guy!” Ron understood the reason for his hesitation. “Not worse than me, really!”
His innocent enthusiasm wasn’t shared but one tall muscled man got up from his bed, approached Yibo and stretched out his hand to him: “Fred. I am the oldest here.”
Yibo shook his hand, feeling himself a small thin Asian next to him: “Yibo. Wang Yibo.”
Fred looked at him with an appraising eye and added: “Just do your work well, don’t mess with anyone and follow the rules – then you’ll have no problems, Yibo.”
“And what are the rules?”
“First of all, keep to schedule. Ron will tell you everything, he’s settled in here quickly.”
“Yes, Yibo, I’ll tell you, lay it on me,” he beamed.
“Thank you, Ron,” Yibo turned to Fred. “Can I take a rest now?”
Fred glanced at wall clock in their dormitory and said: “You have fifty minutes till dinner. You can lie down. We’ve just come back from work – according to the schedule we’re supposed to have a shower now. Lads, go! Ron, are you here or will you stay with Yibo?”
“I’ll help Yibo to settle in,” the man smiled.
“Mind, Ron, that you’ll have to go to bed unwashed.”
“It’s alright for just one time, Fred. A friend came to me after all,” he smiled.
The men got up from their places with towels on their shoulders and went out from the barracks (Yibo just couldn’t let himself call this place in another way) after Fred.
Yibo followed them with his eyes. He still was in some kind of stupor, not understanding what confused him so much. Probably everything? Damn…
“Let me help you,” Ron took his mattress and started to expand it on the upper bed. “I was in a stupor for the first two days but then it was okay. It seems to me now as if I’ve lived here all my life!”
“And who helped you, Ron?” Yibo finally joined the process, his comrade and him made the bed together, applied the sheets and then the cover for his blanket.
“People here are so kind to me,” he waved that off. “Fred told and showed me everything. They’re giving me a mentor soon, then I’ll live the life!”
“They’re giving you whom?”
“A mentor,” Ron smiled. “Rose will tell you soon. It’s a person who’ll help you adapt and, well... become some kind of an older brother for you, do you understand?”
An older brother and an overseer? thought Yibo but asked out loudly: “Do you mind if I lay down just for a bit? I feel...”
“Completely exhausted?” the man smiled. “Crawl up. I’ll sit below.”
Yibo climbed on the bed, the one creaked and bent, stretching the grid bottom. He stretched his legs with pleasure and closed eyes. And Ron asked: “Should I tell you anything?”
“Yes,” the guy responded. “Why are there so many laborers here? I thought we’d be the only ones.”
“Of course not!” Ron said willingly. “Some live here for a long time. For example, Fred’s been here for two years.”
“Two years as a laborer?”
“Yes, that’s why he is the oldest.”
“Why don’t they transfer him to the Brothers?”
“I don’t know, Yibo. The community might think he’s not ready yet. Maybe he's more useful here, who knows? That is his Way.”
“Are they always so unfriendly?”
“No, they are good guys!” Ron responded with a smile. “They are just suspicious of newcomers. But they accepted me right away, Yibo, and they will accept you. No doubt!”
It wasn’t a surprise to Yibo that Ron was accepted always and everywhere immediately. The guy suspected that there was something wrong with the man. Maybe, a slight degree of autism? He looked like a “sunny person”. Whether or not, looking at Ron who was an embodiment of pacifism and friendliness it was quite clear that you shouldn’t expect problems from him. Yibo doubted that other people perceived him himself like that. Okay, the main thing was to try to get into their schedule and keep his head down. Then he would see and understand much more.
“Where did you work today, Ron?”
“There’s only one permanent place for work in the community. It’s a building site. Now a house for a future family is being built. And there are weddings here often, such a joy, Yibo! And when it’s not a building site then they give you different orders. But the building site is the most basic. On the weekend the Brothers, the Familial and even the Confidant join it!”
“The Confidant?”
“The ones who have been with John since the very beginning. You’ve seen them, they talked to you today.”
“And that woman, Ron, was that John’s wife?” Yibo didn’t notice when he started to fall asleep.
“What woman? I didn’t see any women...”
He didn’t hear anything else because he was sleeping already.

Yibo woke up because of the march and at first didn’t even understand where he was. It took him time to realize that he should get down from the top bunk. Men around him were hurriedly getting dressed, including Ron.
“Good morning, Yibo!” he smiled. “Take on your clothes, we all are going to brush teeth now!”
“Is it morning? Did I sleep through the dinner yesterday and the whole night?”
“Yes, William told me not to wake you up. Hurry up, Yibo, it’s not good to keep others waiting!”
Yibo didn’t understand why the others couldn't brush their teeth without him but it turned out that laborers did everything together. Probably, it was easier to govern and manage them like that.
Like in the army, for God’s sake, thought Yibo pondering if he could have run into something similar if he had entered the Police Academy.
They almost paraded into the neighboring room that turned out to be a communal male shower. There they washed and brushed teeth, after that they got back to the barracks (sorry, the dormitory) and, having put their brushes into the bedside tables (one for two, he shared it with Ron), headed to breakfast in the communal dining.
In the communal dining there were long tables and benches. There’d been breakfast on the tables already: the same porridge but they also gave some kind of cherry juice that was a stewed fruit drink[ad] and, for good measure, a honey bun. Red hands of Hilda handed out porridge bowls quickly, which everyone put on their trays as in the usual dining. There was a separate table for laborers, the others were occupied with other men.
Yibo intensively looked at everyone who entered the dining room but there wasn’t Xiao Zhan among them.
He became visibly sad. If Xiao Zhan didn’t eat in the communal dining then God knows when Yibo would be able to see him. What did he have to do?
“What are you thinking of?” Fred asked him.
“Why are there no women here?” Yibo asked the first thing that came to his mind.
“Did you hear, lads?” Fred grinned. “He’s hardly come here but already thinking about the broads!”
Laborers burst out laughing, dragging the attention of other Brothers.
“Forget about women till you’re the Brother,” Fred told him. “They live separately in the women’s block, you’ll encounter them only by chance on the streets or at Sunday's events. But not all the time. Only the Brothers can talk to women.”
“And they actively do that,” one of the laborers agreed. “Because to become the Familial and get your own house from the community you can only if you marry one of the Sisters.”
“Some use the chance, and some don't,” retorted another one. “Romeo, for example, has been asking John to bless their marriage with Julliete for more than a year but he still hasn’t allowed the wedding.”
New information poured on Yibo from everywhere, just had time to analyze, and he unconsciously specified:
“Romeo and Julliet? Really? Like Shakespeare?”
“Well he is really Romeo,” Fred clarified. “An Italian. But she’s in fact Matsumoto Miyami but everyone’s already been calling her Julliete for a long time.”
“And why doesn’t John allow them to marry?” Yibo wondered.
“Hatsumoto’s father is against,” a man shrugged but then William came to their table.
“Hey, you, stop talking and eat in silence!” he ordered strictly. “Stuff your stomachs, boys, ‘cause today you're at the building site all day.”
All talks were quit immediately, men focused on eating and only Ron whispered him really quietly:
“They say the house we’re building now is exactly for Romeo and Miyami. And when it’s ready the couple will be finally together! So we have to work well and fast, Yibo!”

After breakfast they went to the building site. Yibo was given an old working suite that he just wore but he barely started working when one of the men shouted:
“Rose is coming!” and all of them dashed to her as if she was their mother.
Rose herself looked like a dark-skinned Mother of God: she opened her arms wide, hugged them, patted their heads, smiled and laughed.
“Ron, how’re you adjusting? Is everything alright?”
“Yes, Rose!”
“Good job, Ron. Morris, you’ve got a nice haircut. Do you like it?”
“I do but they could’ve done it shorter.”
“Why shorter? You have such beautiful hair. Luciano, you’ve lost some weight... Are you alright?”
“I am, Rose. William tells me that I lose fat and my muscles are growing.”
“The main thing is that you should eat properly, my dear. Don’t you give away your portion to Berthold?”
“No!”
“No, he doesn’t,” responded, obviously, Berthold.
“Good, I just remember that Luciano was constantly feeding you at the beginning.”
“Rose, what film are they showing this Sunday? Rose, can I ask for new pants? Rose, this month are the Confidant going to consider someone to join the Brotherhood?” poured on her from all sides.
“Rose told me that my hair is beautiful,” Morris told one of the laborers and showed him a tongue.
Adult men but they’re being like kids, thought Yibo then.
“Rose, can you talk with the Confidants about me?” even Fred made up to her.
“Oh, Freddie, I talk with them about you every month,” she gently touched his head and said to the rest of them, “Hey, my babies, I’m answering all of your questions with great pleasure but today I came to Yibo.”
All of them sharply fell silent and looked at the guy and he immediately felt that he was the chosen one.
“Would you find a minute for me, dear?” she smiled.
“Of course,” Yibo got just a little shy.
They went to the side, hiding from the sun under the terrace of some house. There were two chairs. The woman let the guy sit in one of them and placed herself in another one.
“How are you, babe?”
“Not bad,” Yibo fidgeted in the chair impatiently. “Rose...”
“Have you already saved up a bunch of questions?” she laughed.
“I have,” Yibo sighed, slightly embarrassed.
“Ask me. That is why I came to you.”
“Where are my things?” he asked straight away. “Have you already taken them away from the guest house?
Her face immediately changed: Yibo’s question seemed to disappoint her, there was nothing left from her unlimited welcoming.
“I thought William explained to you about our attitude to things from beyond the perimeter. You’ll have enough clothes, we’ll give you everything. In any case, William said that you’d already clarified that.”
Yibo’s back ran cold despite the hot day. He said confusedly: “But how... there were... there were all my documents...”
“Oh, don’t worry about that!” she livened up. “We keep all the documents in a secretariat, in a safe, under lock and key. They are safe and sound.”
Yibo gave a hum, choosing words, and clarified: “I would still want to have my documents by hand...”
“Where are you going to keep them?” Rose asked insinuatingly as if he was a small silly child and didn’t understand anything. “In a bedside table that you share with Ron? Or on your bunk under the pillow? They will be quite alright in the safe and... if you suddenly decide to leave, Yibo...” she slowed down as though it was really unpleasant even to think about it, “I mean, if after all of that you still want to leave, I’ll personally give you your case and documents,” the woman lifted her black eyes on him and looked very simple, clearly. “Do you trust me?”
Damn not, thought Yibo, thinking that he’d been caught into a trap. He just couldn’t tell her “no” and keep on arguing, not after all the things he’d said to the committee in her presence. At worst, he would just spoil everything, crack his image but wouldn’t achieve anything. They just pocketed his belongings. They likely did that not for the sake of profit but for the purpose of taking possession of his documents and a phone. Damn, what the Hell... There was their chat with Xiao Zhan on his phone!!
Only then did he remember that Zhan was named in his phone as “Beauty” and the phone itself had to be unblocked with a fingerprint and he felt relieved. In the end the guy still had told them all the truth about himself and they wouldn’t dig up anything on him. Well, at most, they would find out he was gay. Okay, he would repent this, he had nowhere to turn.
It was just a second to think over that, Yibo nervously licked his lips. Rose was watching his confusion closely. Finally, he said: “There was my phone...”
“Do we get back to the conversation about calls to parents?” the woman clarified.
In fact, he wanted to faint-heartedly leave this topic hanging but he fought his cowardice and responded: “We haven’t finished the talk yet...”
She gave him a hum and leant back in the chair, stretched her legs and looked at the horizon. She didn’t hurry with the answer.
“Do you know why I brought those buns to Ron, Yibo?” the woman asked suddenly.
Yibo didn’t expect this question. For a second he foolishly looked at her, blinked and then said with a stutter: “N-no, I don’t know... Why?”
“I brought him buns from the kitchen although you and I know that food is his greatest passion. And I indulged this passion though I shouldn’t have done that. So what’s with me? Am I crazy? Or didn’t I just want Ron to stay with us?”
Yibo understood that she started talking to him about it not just because, she was going somewhere with it, he said carefully: “No, it’s hardly right.”
“I did that, Yibo, because I wanted Ron to stay with us, do you get it? To pass through the committee. Because those buns... they helped him not to break down, see?”
And then Yibo really started to see. Because that seeming “sorting” that he’d gone through, all that “go away, leave” – that was bullshit. Just winding up the weakest and completely not interested ones. They would gladly accept the rest, they just didn’t show that. They would show that you asked for it by yourself, that you begged for that – so that it would be easier for them to impose their will on you. That was just sly entrapping, further and further. But for what? What’s next? To use people as unpaid labor? To dispossess their documents and take some credits on them? Why would they need someone like Wang Yibo?
And Rose, of course, was leading him to the thought about the humaneness of this process of adaptation, that was clear. Yibo nodded diligently:
“Yes-yes, I understand. Chainsmokers, for example, quit smoking just cutting down the number of cigarettes a day. Not everyone is able to get rid of their addictions immediately.”
“That’s right, Yibo, I knew you would understand me,” she smiled. “So, getting back to our conversation about phone, you certainly need to call your parents so that they wouldn't worry. I see.”
Yibo couldn’t even believe she said that but he also felt some pitfall coming.
“However, I ask you to understand me too: the community has its rules about gadgets and all the rest. I can’t give you the phone for permanent use so you would take it everywhere with you as people beyond the perimeter do.”
“Of course, I understand!” Yibo said hastily so as not to scare off her readiness to make concessions.
“But I agree that it would be sensible if, for example, you would call your parents once a week. What do you think? Once a week for ten minutes. Mothers exactly keep up to tell all the news for this time. For example, Friday, mm? It can help you to keep in touch with your family because it’s very important to you but it would enable you to lose a harmful habit of constantly using your phone.”
He surely did not agree with her deep in his mind. He was literally boiling within. More than anything in the world he wanted to lose his nerve and demand his documents back but he felt, he intuitively guessed, that it would lead to nothing and they wouldn’t ever let him go. He should have freaked out earlier, when he was at the waiting area. And now it was too late. It wasn’t worth wasting his moral forces. He had to accept the conditions he was in, “take what they give to you” so to speak, and Yibo forced himself and tried to look as natural as he could:
“Thank you, Rose. That’s... I think, that’s the right decision.”
She peered into him a little longer but then smiled widely and slapped his hand: “Alright then, babe, alright then! This Friday you’ll be able to call your parents. And I have another piece of news for you. You’ll be given a mentor this week.”
Yibo raised a brow: “Yes, Ron said something about “older brothers” but I didn’t seem to understand...”
“Ron interpreted that in his way, of course, but that’s true in whole. That’ll be just a person who’ll help you to make the first steps in our community. Often a mentor and a ward become best friends here. You can consult with them, ask for advice or make agreements... To pour out your doubts and fears.”
“Sounds like you’ll give me a personal psychotherapist,” Yibo smiled wryly and Rose laughed.
“You’re not so wrong, babe. Mentor is a multifunctional job but that is highly respected for us.”
“Really?”
“Of course. To get a blessing from John to become a mentor is like... mmm... some rite of passage, like a transition into adulthood. Into an adult spiritual life.”
Yibo was still looking at her questioningly therefore she clarified:
“Of course, the majority of people who live here are adults already. But to become a mentor is an acknowledgment that a person has fully accepted our ideas, that they’ve become the whole and mature, do you understand? Spiritual maturity. And now they can help other people to reach this wholeness. It’s a necessary milestone in the development of every member of our community.”
“It seems I got that... Does John decide if someone is ready to become a mentor?”
“Of course. He knows better. Things happen to everybody in their own time. No unified formula. But you, Yibo, I hope, will be blessed by John to become a mentor.”
“In any case, I know what to work towards,” he smiled politely.
“Your mentor will be a special person,” she smiled sly.
Yibo became alert: “Why special? Why for me?”
“It just so happened!” she spread her arms. “Fate! This is a young member of our community who has grown here since his childhood.”
Yibo felt some inner agitation but listened to her with raising attention. She went on: “He’s just got a blessing from John to become a mentor. You’ll be his first ward.”
“Is that what is unique about him?”
“Not really,” she was looking at him conspiratorially. “I think you’ll find something in common, he’s not much older than you. And he is also... a Chinese.” Yibo almost jumped in his chair and he was all eyes, “And he’s special for us because he is... a John’s son.”
Yibo choked on air and coughed, the woman burst out laughing, and his eyes became moist. Zhan or not Zhan? When it was Zhan so what, did it turn out that he was John’s son? Of course not, what nonsense... Although... That minute Yibo was ready to accept any nonsense if only Zhan turned to really be his mentor. He still squeezed from himself for Rose: “Does John have children? I didn’t really... expect that.”
“Why?” Rose smiled warmly. “He has a wife and a son, and a detached house – as any Familial in our community. In general, till Friday, I guess, you’ll get acquainted.”
She stood up, straightened her skirt and gave him a warm look: “Get back to work, Yibo. William might be waiting for you. We’ve already talked for too long.”
“What’s his name?” the guy couldn’t restrain himself.
“He’ll tell you himself, when he comes,” she smiled mysteriously and left him.

Yibo came back to William at the building site absolutely confused. It was a mess in his head. He had to think over so many things... Therefore when Yibo got his first task – to unload a cart of bricks to the lads who were quickly putting it in six hands, he set to work, not asking any questions, silently thinking over the conversation.
But he put his attention to Ron anyway (he was carrying cement at that moment), the man seemed to not be feeling well.
He looked completely exhausted, soaked in sweat like a drenched mouse and even walked unsteadily. Yibo thought at first he was just not hardy but then Ron staggered and it started to seem he was going to faint. The guy dashed to him, leaving his bricks and catching his elbow:
“Ron, Ron! Hey! Are you okay?” But Ron’s eyesight was unfocused and blurred so Yibo really was afraid for him, “Ron, what’s the matter? Ron, do you hear me?”
“I do, Yibo. I just... just feel a little sick...”
“A little?’ You're going to lose consciousness. Let’s go find some shadow.”
The house should be a standard two-floor cottage, the first floor was ready so far, so Yibo helped Ron to go down from the second floor and placed him on the cement bags:
“How’re you feeling, Ron?”
“Don’t worry, Yibo,” he mumbled with difficulty. “That’s all just my intracranial pressure...”
“What pressure? Maybe, I’ll bring you some water?”
They had water bottles on the first floor and one mug for everybody. The guy poured some for Ron to drink and a little bit on his head. Fred approached them: “What’s wrong, lads?”
“Ron’s not feeling okay,” Yibo said. “He says he has an intracranial pressure.”
“What the hell is that?” Fred frowned.
“I was severely beaten when I was a child,” Ron smiled nicely as if it was just nothing special, “I even had an operation, I have a plate here, look...”
He took Yibo’s hand and put it to his head where under his hair the guy really felt an old suture.
“So it’s difficult for me to work under the blazing sun... Difficult to lower or lift my head, shake it... But that’s nothing, Fred, don’t get me wrong, I’m not opting out of work! Give me five minutes. I’ll recover and get back.”
“Okay,” said Fred.
“No!” Yibo interrupted him indignantly and looked at Fred, frowning. “You see it, he just can’t work at the site!”
Yibo understood he was looking for trouble. He confronted Fred on his very first day among laborers but he couldn’t let Ron get back under the scorching sun of the building site. His heart ached when he looked at the man.
“I have an order from William,” Fred told him distinctly. “Today everybody’s working at the building site.”
“William might not know about his illness!” Yibo became angry. “You see yourself he’s going to faint!”
Fred pursed lips and at some moment it seemed to Yibo he could smash his face but then surprisingly the man said just: “Deal on that with William.”
“Good. Where’s he?”
“Somewhere here, near. Look near the house.”
Yibo really found him outside. The man was walking around the house, making notes in his notebook.
Yibo quickly told him about Ron but for some reason his report didn’t move him, he just responded with irritation: “Yibo, don’t bother Ron on following his Way.”
What’s the damn Way?! he wanted to shout but restrained himself and tried to just break through to his humanity:
“William, please, just look at Ron and you’ll understand that he really is feeling sick. You see that he won’t ask for help by himself willing to please the community! You see that he will rather die than refuse the task you gave him! He just wants to be accepted here but you see what a person he is!”
William gave him a tense look, fished out a toothpick from his pocket and put into his mouth: “Okay, where is he?”
Just one glance at Ron was enough to understand he wouldn’t last long at the building site. He still tried to convince and talk everybody around: “That’s alright! I’ll do that! I’ve done that all these days! It’s okay!”
“I’ve just ordered him to throw rubbish all these days,” Fred responded, he was staying here with them. “Maybe he isn’t really suited to the tough work?”
“No, I do!” Ron was afraid. “I am suited for any job!”
He tried to stand up but staggered again and fell back on the cement bags.
“Look,” William fished out an old watch without a band out of his pocket, looked at the dial and put them into the pocket again, “now go have lunch. And after breakfast I’ll take him and give him another task.”
Yibo sighed with relief.

He helped Ron to get to the communal dining, finding out with a surprise a piece of a chicken breast in his bowl.
“Meat?!” Yibo perked up and immediately felt his mouth watering.
“The ones who work at the building site must have meat in the food ration,” Ron told him, he seemed to recover for a bit. “That’s why nobody is against the building site. We need strength. Yibo, do you want my portion?”
“What? Ron, why?”
“I’m going to another task anyway but you still need power. Take my piece of chicken. And you supported me Yibo, no one has even been so kind to me, really.
Yibo really wanted that second piece. And more than that, he would eat ten more, but he got ahold of himself and restrained, understanding what a sacrifice it was for Ron, given that food was his biggest passion.
“You don’t have to, Ron. You deserve your piece. Enjoy your meal.”
The man beamed with the cutest smile he could give and said sincerely:
“You are my best friend, Yibo. Enjoy your meal!”

After the lunch William really took Ron somewhere and Yibo himself went back to the building site where he worked till the evening. He met the man only after work, before dinner, when laborers had to go take a shower. At that moment the man really felt much better, was cheerful and lively as usual:
“I went to the house of one of the families, helped them with renovation!” he started excitedly. “They have a wonderful house! So beautiful! And two nice kids and even a dog, can you imagine, Yibo?”
“To the house of the Familial?” he was surprised. “And what did you do?”
“Painted floor and with the landlady removed old wallpapers. She was very kind and friendly. Even treated me to carrot cookies that she cooked herself!”
“Does it mean that laborers can get into the house of the Familials?” he pulled thoughtfully.
“Yes! I’m so glad! I saw how they live – it’s so great!” Ron beamed all over. “Their dog is so good! And they are such nice people!”
Male shower room turned out to be communal without any booths. Just tiled walls and floor with drains, small squares of windows under the ceiling and iron watering cans with old rusty valves sticking out of the wall. Just having seen that Yibo understood that he had to forget about jerking for... he didn’t even know for how many days. Because of that he got somehow... sad.
Laborers quickly and orderly washed, not looking at each other. In any other case Yibo would have been joyful and cheered, would have said something in Wenhan’s style: “I just got into the Heaven of male butts – stare if you want” but the atmosphere didn’t suit watching male asses. Here you had a paradox: no visible control over the intimate sphere of life but it was still presented.
Yibo just imagined to himself how the men would react if he, not caring about others, started to blow job himself under the warm shower – and laughed nervously. He wondered if he would be dropped out or if they had a system of penalties for cases like that.
Having come back from the shower, he saw folded clothing on his bed: trousers with a belt, two T-shirts, two shirts and there were worn-out old shoes on the floor. Wear as much as you want.

After dinner came the time for a spiritual self-development. Someone went to meditate, someone – to some other mysterious, unknown deals. A lot of them were reading John’s works, just like him. In fact, Yibo was just keeping a book on his chest, pretending to dive deep into reading. His thoughts floated somewhere far.
That was his first complete day as a laborer and it straight away turned out to be rich for events and information. Yibo pondered who would be his mentor, prayed that it would be Xiao Zhan. Thought if he could be John’s son. His intuition told him that it wasn’t true, at least not a biological one.
He also thought how he could try his luck and to get to helpers of the Familial. What if he would be lucky and get to Xiao Zhan’s house?
Closer to 10pm all laborers started coming back and lay down on their bunks. Despite the open window it was stuffy in the room and Yibo decided to go out and get some fresh air, to stay outside just for ten minutes. He got down from his bed and put on new-old boots that turned out to be too small for him. Hell with them, he would wear his trainers.
“Where are you going?” Fred frowned.
“I’ll walk, breath fresh air,” said Yibo.
“What?” Fred turned to him with the others. That’s how Yibo found out that there was a curfew there.

Chapter Text

Having just woken up out of the hated march, Yibo felt that his whole body ached, and his muscles were in pain. It seemed that the first day at the building site hadn’t passed without leaving a trace. And he dared to think of himself as a sporty and bulked up person.
It was difficult to get up and to get ready for the building site too, but the only thought, that he would be allowed to call his parents today and that he was going to meet his mentor and it could be Xiao Zhan, supported him.
After breakfast William told Yibo and Ron:
“Your mentors will come to you to the house of laborers after dinner. So do not wander off anywhere.”
Yibo just grunted at his words: if he only could…
Ron was again taken to some errands, Yibo hoped that he wouldn’t come back to the site anymore. The day dragged on tediously but everything has its ends.
At dinner Ron was surprisingly excited out of the forthcoming meeting with a mentor. He just couldn’t rest and constantly thought out loudly about who it would be and what relationships they would build.
One of the laborers couldn’t stand it and roared at him:
“Shut up! Let us eat in silence.”
Yibo gave the man a look sideways, Fred – a warning one, but Ron didn’t get offended, just covered his mouth with a hand and whispered:
“Santiago, I’m sorry.”
Finally, they came back to the house of laborers, first they came to Ron. That was one of the men who’d “interviewed” Yibo before he was accepted into laborers. Ron, obviously, recognized him too. His face fell out of admiration and disbelief that he could be given a mentor who was not just an occasional person but one of the founders of the settlement.
“I told you, I would take care of you, Ron,” he smiled, stretching his hand and the man shaked it with awe:
“Victor, I thought you said it as a matter of courtesy... I didn’t expect...”
The mentor smiled genially and hugged his shoulders patronizingly:
“No idle politeness, I really liked all that you’d said...” the men walked Ron outside and they slowly walked down the gravel path. They indeed had something to talk about.
Yibo got worried even more, stood near the window to sight in advance when someone would approach their house. Main thing was to restrain himself if it would be Xiao Zhan and not to incriminate himself. And would Xiao Zhan be able to restrain himself?
Then Yibo noticed a spot on his trousers. Damn. He quickly got to the communal restroom, soaked a trouser-leg on the hip and soaped it with a small piece of soap under the old dim mirror. That was when he heard when someone came into their dorm. Men reacted excitedly as though a star visited them. They greeted him respectfully, Yibo tried to wash the spot as fast as possible, cursed. Over the huge uproar he heard:
“And where is Wang Yibo?” that voice was unfamiliar to him, and that echoed with a wave of disappointment in his body. He stopped rushing, calmly closed the water tap, dried the trouser-leg with a piece of toilet paper.
“He’s in the restroom,” Fred said. Yibo casted the last glance at himself in the mirror and went out.

John’s son looked Chinese, was young (approximately the same age as Xiao Zhan), handsome, tall and when he smiled a coquettish dimple appeared on his right cheek.
“Zhou Yixuan,” he stretched his hand to Yibo.
“Wang Yibo,” he shaked it.
The man put hands in his pockets, turned to the other men, he was visibly awkward himself:
“Let’s go have a walk and talk?”
Yibo nodded and they went out of the house, idly went down the gravel path, not directing anywhere exactly.
“Rose should’ve already told you who I am,” John’s son suggested shyly and Yibo nodded. The man nodded too as though saying: “Of course, everyone knows that,” bit the lower lip and told him, “I’d like to build our relationship not like between a laborer and John’s son.”
Yibo involuntarily chuckled. That’s a pity. He would gladly question him about his daddy. The man deftly evaded from talking about his father. Although... he could understand him. Here his father was a local superstar and he was always just “John’s son”. Easy to imagine how he should’ve been sick of it.
“Well.. I can’t understand even more what it should be like,” Yibo pulled. “So...”
“Let’s talk just like Yixuan and Yibo. Okay?”
“Okay,” he shrugged.
“Actually, my mission in this regard is that you’ll become Brother. To help you go through the path. No strict rules, that’s very individual.”
“I see.”
“Most mentors discuss father’s books with their wards, always talk on philosophical topics...”
“Uh-huh.”
“But I think it’s not enough,” Yixuan looked at him and at that moment his eyes gave off the enthusiasm of a person who’s fully engaged in a new challenge. “If you share the philosophy but something oppresses you on some basic level so everything will be in vain. I wish you wanted remain here yourself, understood what a beautiful place it is!”
“That’s logical.”
“So, please, Yibo, be open-hearted with me. Talk about everything that confuses you, offer, ask whenever you want anything – my task is to help you go through your Way.”
Those words were, of course, very appealing, but Yibo didn’t hurry to enjoy and was cautious. At first, he decided to talk to Yixuan about everything he’d discussed with Rose. He told him about his worries for the documents – Yixuan’s answer was the same: they were very much alright in the safe. The moment Yibo needed to take them, they would give them back. He talked with him about his Friday call to parents – Yixuan found Rose’s offer “optimal” and promised that Yibo would call his parents right today. Meanwhile, his young mentor was bursting with enthusiasm and was happy that their communication flowed well. He seemed to be also proud of being able to give Yibo something as though he’d dreamt of taking care of someone but just hadn’t had the chance:
“Anything else, Yibo? Can I help you with anything else?”
Yibo understood he shouldn’t make very bold steps but he also didn’t want to be modest. It was better to use the exuberance of the young mentor the moment he had it:
“Yes... boots I was given are just a little small. I am a size forty-three, but these are forty-two.”
“Alright, I’ll definitely ask Isaac to give you another pair. Anything else?”
Here Yibo decided to take a risk: “I heard there was a boys choir “Nightingales”.”
“Oh, yeah!” Yixuan beamed. “Our pride!”
“Can I listen to them sometime?”
Yixuan nodded understandingly and told him: “Our children choir performs and delights us with their songs usually on Sundays, at Sunday events. But they are held only for Brothers and Sisters of the community, laborers are not usually invited to the communal hall, see?”
Damn. Yibo clamped his jaw.
“I see...”
“But you know what? I think it would be not bad to make an exception once...”
Yibo looked at him with hope. Yixuan pulled thoughtfully:
“The choir is singing this Sunday. It might even be good for you, the laborers... Will dispel your boredom,” Yixuan glanced at Yibo and smiled. “Don’t be surprised, I know myself that sometimes terrible melancholy attacks you here.”
“Yixuan, can I... can I take Ron with myself?”
Yixuan laughed and slapped Yibo’s shoulder: “If you make an exception then for everyone at once, Yibo. What future brotherhood are we talking about then?”
That was when they came back to the house of laborers. Zhou Yixuan promised him to talk to other mentors and organize a joint campaign for Sunday's event. With that they parted.
By the order of Yixuan, William saw him off to the warehouse that exact evening, where Isaac gave him his discharged phone. Yibo understood that William wouldn’t go away and would follow his every step. Well... He said he had to charge the phone at least a little and just sat for five minutes, waiting for the phone to turn on. William was near all that time, watching him. Then Yibo managed to quickly delete the message app where there was still their chat with Xiao Zhan and his number as well and cleaned the history of calls, before William noticed petulantly: “What’s taking you so long? You wanted to call your parents – so call.”
Yibo understood that William wouldn’t go away while he would be calling and would be stuck here, watching him. Okay…
His mother wasn’t really scared, when Yibo called her. Actually that was an advantage that they hadn’t called each other often. But she still noticed:
“Baby, you’ve not called for several days. Is anything wrong with your phone? I called you and wrote to you but you didn’t take the phone and didn’t reply...”
“Sorry, mom, yeah... have dropped the phone, the screen is broken. I don’t see messages at all and calls reach me half the time.”
“So buy a new one! Baby, what’s the matter? Do you have money?”
“Yes, mom, everything’s alright,” Yibo caught himself on the fact he was listening to his mother’s dear voice with affection. “You know, without a phone I felt so free... I want to try it once again. I’ll call you but not often, okay?”
“Baobao, are you really alright?”
“I am, mom. Why are you worrying about such stuff? Say better, how’s dad?”
“Oh, and what about him? As usual, overwhelmed with work...” she told him the latest news, and Yibo understood how badly he missed his father. Why had they spent so little time together lately?
William stood in front of him with an intimidating look and showed two fingers. Yibo understood that out of ten agreed minutes remained just two and unwillingly interrupted his mother: “I need to go, mom. I’ll call you sometime in a week, do you mind? Love you, mom. Kiss you, bye.”
He felt some kind of humiliation mixed with sadness when he gave his phone back to William as a well-behaved boy. But that was better than nothing. However, a thought clearly flashed in his mind: to see Xiao Zhan and, right away, to escape from here. They gotta get out.

That same evening, just before the hour of bedtime (like in summer camp, for God’s sake), Ron in undertone told him excitedly what tasks he’d performed today:
“At the beginning I helped Rose, cleared out some new things that lads brought from beyond the perimeter. We sent something to Isaac at the warehouse, something to the kitchen and something right to the building site. But I went to Isaac at the warehouse and helped him there. Isaac is still old, it’s difficult for him to climb up the stepladder so I did it and he held me things out! Then he gave me some tools and ordered me to bring them to one of the Families and I carried them. And then it turned out that there were not just ordinary tools but for turning the grand piano, can you imagine?! One of the Families there has a real grand piano! And Brother who lives there adjusted his grand piano with those tools and checked how it sounded. Tightened something up and then pressed the grand piano key. So interesting!”
Yibo was only half-listening to him, lying on his upper bunk. He almost fell asleep because his day was so rich for events until Ron said:
“And then the Brother played the whole melody for me on that grand piano and asked: “How do you like it?” and I said: “Good” and then it turned out that he was the director of our choir “Nightingales”, imagine?”
Yibo almost fell down from his bed, so fast did he rolled out of his blanket and appeared at the bottom, near Ron, gazing him:
“What did you say, Ron? Director of the choir “Nightingales”?”
“Yes...” Ron was really startled with his reaction.
“And what did he look like?”
“Good... Neatly.”
“No, Ron, what is his appearance like?”
“Oh, he is very beautiful, just like you, Yibo. And tall. And his fingers are so long – they were just running over the keys while he was playing!” Ron showed that as he could, running his fingers over his blanket.
“And do you remember his name?”
“Sure, Isaac told me to bring the tools to Xiao's house, which is the fifth from the left in the Family block. Their house is so beautiful, of pale-peach color...”
Yibo’s heart was booming in his chest.
“Tell me something else about him, Ron... What else did he tell you? What did he do?”
“I don’t know...” Ron was really at a loss. “Why?”
“Nothing.... nothing, Ron,” he disappointedly got up to his bed and barely fell asleep by the end of night.

Saturdays in the community were “Cleanup Days''. Under any circumstances did they have rest, only worked but in a somehow different form. All community members (of course, besides laborers) went to meetings with John in the morning. Sure, what happened at those meetings was presented to laborers as a great mystery that they didn’t yet deserve.
In the second half of the day, after lunchtime, almost all the community joined laborers at the building site. Men were in working suits, cheerful. They brought their own tools and just expected orders from William. What’s more, among the workers Yibo sighted also members of the committee – so really almost all people came by.
But that Saturday Xiao Zhan didn’t come to the building site although Yibo remembered him saying that he’d done that often.
Their construction crew, having increased almost by four times, started working so quickly that till the end of the day they were done with building the second floor. Moreover, a spirit of unity, friendliness was floating everywhere. Yibo wondered and involuntarily succumbed to the common mood.
Women came as well. They served a laid big table right outside, each of them brought something they’d managed to cook: baking, a big saucepan of stewed fruit, someone made salads. Couple of men organized a barbecue and roasted pieces of chicken and vegetables on the charcoal, cooked fish.
Yibo choked on saliva but kept silent until he saw women handing out to all working men, including laborers, plates with food.
Only some time later did he find out that it was called “serving” and was an obligatory at women’s block on Saturdays that was imposed on all the Sisters by John.
It was partly for unmarried Sisters and Brothers so that they could communicate with each other and make relationships. Partly to pacify the pride of Familial women, making them serve the laborers. Partly to show that laborers had somewhere to strive. That to be Brother or Sister weren’t just words. That a big close-knit family was awaiting them, that organized barbeque every Saturday.
That day Yixuan came to him to work and he did that very well, he wasn’t really a softie.
“I managed to talk to the others. Tomorrow we’re taking all the laborers to the evening choir performance,” Yixuan told him when they decided to have a little rest.
“That’s good!” Yibo smiled sincerely. “The rest will be happy, I’m sure!”
A young blond girl with curly hair and blue eyes brought Yixuan a plate and smiled shyly:
“Brother Yixuan, accept it...”
“Thank you, Annie,” he smiled at her and nodded to Yibo. “Can you bring another one for my ward?”
The girl nodded and went away, and something stinged Yibo at the sight of her but he couldn’t understand yet what exactly. When the girl came back and gave him the same plate of food Yibo thanked her, accepting it, and understood that she seemed slightly familiar. But where could he have seen her?
Laborers had to still keep apart from the rest, segregate. They were forbidden to start the dialogue with women, William watched that strictly. Laborers were just like the other participants of the common event but at the same time they weren’t. Yibo thought that was for the sake of fueling them with a desire to achieve the goal and join the Brotherhood.
Yixuan came to his mother and, as Yibo guessed, that was that woman from the committee. Yibo understood that not all members of the community were still at the building site. There wasn’t Xiao Zhan, there weren’t any children and there wasn’t John, of course. And maybe many others. He was eating and casting glances at the girl who brought him food thinking where he could know her from. Annie, Annie... Ann…
And then it struck him! She was in that photo in the advert! Exactly! A teenager that was missing in Anthony! Left her home. The advert was on the bus stop and he’d read that out of idleness. It seemed to Yibo that it was centuries ago. What was her name again?.. Ann... Ann... That should have been a double name... Julie-Ann... No. Joana? Jessica! Jessica-Ann Robinson!
He jumped from his place and headed straight to her as if he was going to give her away the dirty plate. She modestly accepted the dish, not looking at Yibo, and he asked her straight quietly:
“Are you Jessica-Ann Robinson?”
The girl lifted her scared blue eyes on him but Yixuan immediately appeared near, grabbed his elbow and roughly pulled him aside:
“You can’t talk to women, Yibo.”
They looked each other in the eyes, Yibo licked lips:
“Yixuan, is her name Jessica-Ann Robinson?”
The guy startled, looking at his ward, and asked: “Do you know her?”
“So is it her?” Yibo pressed.
“Maybe,” he responded cautiously.
“Yixuan,” Yibo tried to sound as calm as possible, “do you know her parents are looking for her?”
He understood by his face that Yixian had no idea about that. Or he could just be a great actor who deserved an Oscar. Not wasting time Yibo decided to go on pressuring his mentor:
“The whole Anthony is covered with papers about her. Why’s she here? How’d she get here?”
“She came herself,” escaped from Yixuan but he bit his tongue, collected himself and looked at Yibo warily, “Are you sure about this information, Yibo?”
“When she is Jessica-Ann Robinson then I am,” he said firmly.

Sunday was an official day-off even for him. Laborers were left to their own devices and Yibo didn’t know what to do with himself. He was waiting for the evening concert with a sinking heart. They were even given a third shirt – a dress one, and they queued to the ironing board to look absolutely flawless.
Ron asked Isaac to find them black shoe wax and a piece of sponge so he earned the gratitude of co-workers, and Yibo himself was in a special honor that day because it was thanks to him they were invited to look at the choir.
“Are you on a good tracking record with Yixuan?” Fred asked him, looking at him with interest. “You asked and he immediately pulled some strings.”
“He’s just a good guy,” Yibo said, feeling that Fred was wondering if he could benefit from Yibo in the future, “but there are some borders in his concessions.”
Fred chuckled: “My mentor barely visits me. You don’t even understand how lucky you are, Yibo.”
“If you say it then I am,” Yibo decided to finish this conversation as peacefully as possible, “Thank you, Fred.”
“You can call me, Freddie,” he stretched an arm to Yibo and he shaked it though he understood they would never make friends.

Finally, the evening came. A group of laborers in ironed shirts, shiny shoes (Yibo got almost new from the warehouse, this time his size) headed after William to the Assembly Hall where all mass events of the community were held. Having entered, Yibo understood that he’d seen this hall in the photos on the website of the community. That was a quite big room, maybe, the biggest at the ranch, designed for several hundred people.
There was a separate section for laborers: three last benches in the right row. William gave them exhortations:
“Do not change places, do not talk with either each other nor other Brothers nor, moreover, Sisters. Remember: you’re just guests here, you’re allowed only to watch.”
The men nodded: that was clear, no questions.
Before the event Yixuan and other mentors came to them: “Lads, how are you? Alright?”
They nodded, thanked.
The hall was slowly being filled with people: on their row were sitting only men, all women were in the left row. Little children were either with their fathers or mothers, regarding the gender. Even the Familial were separated.
Yibo noticed Jessica-Ann Robinson who was exceptionally beautiful in her pale-blue dress. Interestingly, were women given the things from the warehouse too? She came past Yibo and sat in her section. The fact she also participated in the event showed that she wasn’t a laborer but already the Sister. Very interesting…
Having followed his gaze, Yixuan leaned to Yibo: “I asked about her from her mentor,” he whispered into his ear. “She’s really that “missing” girl but she isn’t, in fact, missing anymore. It seems that the advert you saw was old. She came to us herself, they kept in touch with her parents, they know where she is. They don’t mind.”
Some mixed feelings arose within Yibo after this message. He was looking at Yixuan, he wanted to ask: “Do you believe it yourself?”, but he understood that it was neither the right place nor time to start such a conversation. Did Yixuan deceive him intentionally? Or did he believe himself in that nonsense they told him? Or didn’t he just want to think over it, didn’t want to either see or hear?
Yibo had to just nod to Yixuan in response and the guy, satisfied, came forward to his place and sat in the first row. Probably everyone had their own place in the Assembly Hall. The higher the status the closer to “the stage”?
Finally, the event started. It was “held” by one of the members of the committee, Ron’s mentor. He was speaking through the microphone so that everyone could hear him well:
“Brothers and Sisters! What a delightful day! Today is a truly special day! Today we are listening to our boys choir after some small hiatus.”
Everyone clapped their hands, shouted joyfully. The majority were in high spirits whereas Yibo just watched the reactions of the community members.
“Yibo, that’s my mentor Victor, did you recognize him?” Ron whispered into his ear with enthusiasm.
Yibo nodded and Victor continued: “And we’ll see, of course, Xiao Zhan! We missed him so much!”
A wave of cheerful shouts again, and Yibo frowned: what did it mean, missed? Where’d he been all that time?
“Well and, of course, we’ll see John,” his voice sank in the third wave of shouts, the most deafening one. “Yes, yes, a wonderful day! And the most special today is that we are not the only ones lucky but our laborers are as well! Under the initiative of our Brother Yixuan they are together with us today!”
There was polite applause but this time no ovation. Victor smiled once again: “Brothers, Sisters, open your hearts now! John!”
It seemed to Yibo that he was at some kind of k-pop star concert: a huge hall, with more than four hundred people, burst with ovation. A side door opened and in front of endless rows of benches went out a tall gray-haired man, exactly as in the last photos Yibo saw him on the website of the community. An aristocratic bearing, an appealing grayness of hair, a neat beard, a Hollywood smile. He was dressed simply: black trousers and a black turtleneck with sleeves rolled to elbows. That reminded Yibo of something.
The man stopped and smiled widely to his community, raised a hand in a greeting gesture. The hall almost choked on shouts and rapture. Yibo saw how Ron’s eyes lit up, saw how women got to exaltation and shouted to him:
“John! John!”
And Yibo saw he savored that. That huge wave of love and attention to himself. He was just standing and waving a hand. And savoring. That moment he seemed like a really modest person. And then Yibo understood who John reminded him of. Not with his appearance, of course, but with his style, self-presentation and external modesty and simplicity of gestures. The spitting image of Steve Jobs at the presentation of another iphone. Steve Jobs with a glimpse of Sean Connery in his late years. He even gave a hum out of that sudden discovery.
People stretched their arms to John, some women even cried. John made a sign to his audience to be more quiet and the crowd instantly calmed down as if trained.
Victor obsequiously handed him a microphone as though it was a scepter. The man took it and smiled to the persons present:
“Sorry that I wasn’t here yesterday.”
The crowd couldn’t stand it and exploded with shouts of admiration, some of the women cried especially loudly:
“We still love you, John!”
He seemed embarrassed, made a “quiet” sign with a hand gesture and responded: “I love you too. I was ill. But I am healthy now. I’m glad. I missed you.”
Another wave of admiration from the audience that swept in his direction, and he went on:
“But today we’ve gathered here not for me! Today our choir is ready to perform again. I heard, they learnt a new song. The boys are so glorious! I want to look at them with my whole family. And I feel that Salvation will descend onto one of them today!”
Another wave of exultation and John placed himself in the first row, near Yixuan. What’s more, Yixuan’s mother was sitting in the first line of the female row.
Victor came forward again, smiling joyfully: “Brothers and Sisters, our cute and lovely children: “Nightingales!”
Applause, and boys of different ages started going out from the side door in a single file, lining up in two rows. Twenty-four people, as Xiao Zhan’d said. They were dressed not in full dress as in the photos from the website, in white shirts and black trousers, but differently: various shirts, pullovers, jackets but all of them – in similar beige shorts, exposing their boyish knees.
They obediently lined and got quiet and Victor said in the microphone: “Our children are the best on earth! Look at them, what angels they are! Wonderful, aren’t they?”
Applauses and approving shouts.
“And the director of our beautiful choir who we missed so much: Xiao Zhan!”
Yibo leaned forward, exhaled and gripped into the bench with his fingers.
Xiao Zhan went out of the same door: black trousers, light-blue shirt buttoned up. The crowd greeted him very warmly and welcoming, but Yibo saw that he was slightly limping while walking and, when the man fully turned their face to them, he gasped and even narrowed his eyes just to make sure but his eyesight had never let him down: on the right cheekbone Zhan had an old bruise. It already changed its color for sickly-yellow and the corner of his lower lip had a healing crust.
But it barely confused anyone. They greeted him, of course, but not that excitedly and exalted as John but quiet warmly. He nodded at them, made a sign “quiet” with his hand, like John. Victor held the microphone up to him and Zhan said in it: “Sorry for the hiatus that we had to take in our rehearsals. I am glad to get back to my duties. We’ve learnt a new song. It’s called “Sight on your way”.” (1)
He didn’t say anything else, under the shared applause he nodded shortly, turned to his choir and raised hands with the first director’s gesture. A swing and the boys started singing altogether:
“Sight on your way
Forgotten urchins who lost their path,
Give them your hand,
To guide them
To another future.”

They were singing beautifully: clear and in harmony, the angels indeed. Yibo shared the awed silence formed in the huge hall, eyes moist with moving emotions, close attention.

“Feel in the night
A wave of hope,
The enthusiasm of life,
The path of glory.”

And the one who made this choir as it was today was Xiao Zhan. His Zhan. Yibo was looking at his back and hands directing twenty-four beautiful voices and was proud and also... he couldn’t believe that man was really his Zhan. The one who adored fast food and didn’t like packaged tea, the one who liked Queen and Maneskin, who wasn’t skilfull with modern phones at all.

“Happy сhildhood time
Forgotten quickly, erased.
Gold light
Is beaming endlessly at the very end
Of the way.”

And was he really his, his Zhan? Which one was more real – the guy who’d passionately gave himself to him four times at one night or this man, buttoned up tight? What would be when they meet gazes?
And what if – that was just Xiao Zhan’s passing fancy? His whim that he’d decided to afford himself? A toy that he didn’t mind throwing away when the game went too far?
A wave of fear swept through Yibo and he involuntarily paled, he felt sick and closed his eyes, living through this delusion.
He opened them when the song finished. The hall exploded with ovation, Xiao Zhan turned to the community and nodded and then turned back again, preparing the choir for the continuation.
“They sing wonderfully, don’t they, Yibo?” Ron beamed next to him.
“Uh-huh,” he squeezed from himself.
Something was wrong with Xiao Zhan’s leg. During the next six songs he often shifted his support on just one leg though the director shouldn’t do that. Yibo wondered where he traumatized his leg and where that bruise and a split lip were from. Tripped and fell? His gut feeling told him: barely... But he could do nothing, damn nothing: just to look at him from the last row and be silent. If only he knew that having come here, he would get into such a dependent position. He wouldn’t have come then, would have found another way to keep in touch with Zhan…
But cold reason asked him then: what way? Which one?
He didn’t have an answer.
“So close and so far. Close – and so far...”

When their small program was finished Zhan modestly went to the side, presenting his choir. John stood up from his place, took a microphone from Victor and said with emotion:
“I can’t stop being proud of our boys. What a wonder, such angels!”
The hall excitedly supported him, then John put his free hand to his heart and declared soulfully:
“I feel that one of them will be Saved today.”
There was an excitement among the audience, women grabbed their hearts, a trembling expectation. Yibo understood damn nothing. John turned to the choir, bypassed them like a commander reviewing troops, patted someones heads, touched cheeks, finally he stopped in front of a boy in the first row: he was ten, not older, a clear glance, bruised knees and hair stood up in tufts.
“Today you’ll be Saved,” he gently touched his face, the crowd roared.
Yibo still didn't understand what he’d seen. And if he had even seen anything. He suddenly thought that if that boy was his, for example, younger brother he would like John to get his hands off of him.
Of course, they didn’t meet with Xiao Zhan. Zhan wasn’t just able to catch a glimpse of him in that crowd. Did he even know that he had to inspect the present persons closely? Sure, he didn’t.
After the performance of the choir John stayed to talk to his community, and that was already a private conversation. William led the laborers out and they went to bed earlier because tomorrow started another tough week, dull and long workweek on their Way.
But Yibo certainly couldn’t fall asleep. He was lying and thinking and thinking about everything.

Chapter Text

All the next day, despite lack of sleep, Yibo was thinking about Xiao Zhan and that Ron knew where exactly he lived. That intrusive thought didn’t give him rest, he had no patience. He wanted to see Xiao Zhan as soon as possible because that was his third week in the community but he still hadn’t made any progress in his mission.
After work Yibo seized the moment and dragged Ron to the side:
“Ron, let’s talk...”
The man was just glad: “Of course, Yibo! I like talking with you! About what?”
“Did you like the choir performance yesterday?” he started from afar although it was a silly question. Of course, Ron did like it.
“Oh, sure!” he glowed immediately. “At the third song I even cried, Yibo! They’re such angels!”
“And the director of the choir, Xiao Zhan, did you see him? Was he the one who tuned the grand piano?”
“Yes!” the man nodded cheerfully. “And he plays the grand piano so well! He seems to be a wonderful person!”
“Yes, it seems so,” Yibo exhaled and collected himself. “What if we go visit him, Ron? Mm? Thank him for the beautiful concert, what do you think?”
Ron was confused, rubbed his temple: “I don’t know if we can, Yibo... You know, we’re not allowed to just go to the Familial... Shall we ask our mentors?”
“No no!” Yibo hastily raised a hand. “Let’s not tell them anything. Are we little children, or what? Just show me where he lives – and you can go away after that if you’re afraid. I’ll thank him for you.”
Ron got upset – his face got visibly sad, he sobbed, frowned, said quietly:
“Yibo, you don’t do the right thing. You want me to lie to my mentor. That’s bad, against the rules...”
Yibo got scared. What if Ron decided to confess about their conversation to Victor? He quickly curtailed the initiative: “You’re right, Ron! You’re right, that’s against the rules. Yes, we’d better become Brothers and get to know Xiao Zhan ourselves, right? Officially!”
Ron smiled again, nodded.
“Don’t say anything to your mentor, Ron, okay? Or they’ll punish me.”
“For what, Yibo? You didn’t do anything!” he said innocently but nodded. “Okay, I won’t tell him.”

But the thought of visiting the Familial block by himself, without Ron, didn’t let him go. What did he know about the community structure? It was divided into several sections. There were no fences but locals handled that and knew perfectly where they could go and where they couldn't.
There was a Communal block: with a Waiting Area and a guest house, a communal dining and a library.
There was a Male block: with house of laborers and houses where unmarried brothers lived.
The same was a Female block.
A Familiy block consisted of detached houses for Families. There supposedly lived John. Building of the house, all laborers took part in, was on the outskirts of that block. They were forbidden to go further than the building site.
And there was also a Domestic block. Yibo was there just once, at the warehouse of Isaac. That block smelled of manure because they raised poultry there, that the community used for food, and kept their cows. All women were busy with that.
That seems to be it.
Yibo knew how to get into the Family block, maybe Ron went across the building site because that was the only way they knew.
The fifth house from the left, of a pale-peach color, as the man told him. He bet Xiao Zhan lived not so far from the building site.
The thought that all that time Xiao Zhan was, at most, 500 meters from him incredibly excited and stirred him up. On Tuesday he finally collected himself. Since Yibo was left to his own devices only in the evenings – three hours a day, so after dinner before bedtime he told Fred he was going to the library but then went to the building site. He took just John’s book with himself because he had nothing else to take. He didn’t really imagine what would be when someone asked him what he was doing in the Familial block.
The guy was shaking right after he had passed the site. Yibo tried to walk calmly and steadily, purposefully. He indeed had a purpose, he shouldn’t rush between the houses all the time. Oh Lord, if only he’d calculated everything correctly, if only Xiao Zhan’s house was where he supposed it to be, left, fifth, peach color...
And it was there.
Yibo’s heart started beating fast as he saw that. He slowed down, trying to decide quickly what to do if there was Xiao Zhan’s mother or father who would open him the door. What to do, if Xiao Zhan himself would open the door?! God, if only he wouldn’t blurt out something out of surprise…
Yibo made several steps towards his house when he heard behind: “Laborer?!”
Yibo immediately ran cold despite the hot day. He froze and then slowly turned back. Damn! That was Victor, Ron’s mentor.
His pulse was so fast that it seemed to Yibo that he would faint out of fear and stupor. Victor was surprised and was looking at him suspiciously, with hostility.
“What are you doing here?” he asked sharply. “It’s the Family block, you know it? You can’t go here.”
Yibo swallowed hard: “I’m looking for Yixuan.”
Victor approached him slowly, having hands in his pockets.
“Why?”
“I want to talk to him,” Yibo showed Victor John’s book as if it explained everything.
Victor was silent, eyeing him and then said: “Yixuan will come to you when he’s able, you know that,” and that sounded like don’t treat me like a fool.
He shouldn’t balk, moreover, that was dangerous. Yibo submissively lowered his eyes: “You’re right. I was impatient, I’m sorry.”
“Was impatient and broke the rule,” he added with pressure.
“Yes, I’m sorry,” Yibo looked down to his feet but Victor wasn’t going to let him go so fast. He pressed Yibo with his glance, drilled:
“If you were my ward, Yibo, I would have to punish you.”
Bitch, what a dull prick…
Yibo stubbornly didn’t lift his eyes, endured: “You’re right. I shouldn’t have come here.”
“But the one who’s responsible for you is Yixuan,” there was even a disappointment in Victor’s voice. “I’ll have to convey to him that you were looking for him.”
“Yes, of course. I’m leaving immediately.”
But Victor marinated him a little bit more, peering, and then said: “Go.”
Wang Yibo quickly retreated, cursing to himself.

Of course, Yixuan came to him right the next day but he looked calm, not angry, rather – confused. They took a walk again though Yibo’s legs were aching from work and he wanted to lay down but he understood that he shouldn’t disregard his mentor’s attention.
“I know you came to the Familial block yesterday, were looking for me,” Yixuan started slowly.
Yibo sighed: “Yes, that was silly. I made a mistake.”
“Why were you looking for me?”
“Read a new chapter of “Brotherhood”. Wanted to discuss it with you.”
Yixuan fell silent and then asked quietly: “Why did you have to break the rule and go find me if we’ve agreed that I would come to you today?”
Yibo had no answer for this question. He just said a little bit annoyed, not looking at Yixuan: “I told you, that was silly. I shouldn’t have done that.”
“Yibo,” Yixuan stopped and the laborer had to stop as well, “aren’t you lying to me?”
Damn. Damn hell.
Yibo was looking down at his feet, he was silent and angry. But Yixuan said suddenly: “I understand you, Yibo. Trust is something you should merit. Let’s go.”
And he purposefully headed in the direction of the library. His surprised ward followed him.
“Can you play chess?” Yixuan asked when they hid from the evening sun in the shadow of the room.
“No...” Yibo pulled confusedly. He expected, to be honest, that he would be told off but not what Yixuan asked him about: “And checkers?”
The guy nodded and Yixuan opened one of the cupboards under the shelves and took out a wooden board for a game. Sat at the table, poured out the checkers and nodded at the place in front of him.
“Sit down.”
Yibo confusedly sat. Why did Yixuan feel the urge to play checkers? What was going on?
“I thought you’re not allowed to play in the community,” Yibo pulled with insecurity.
“We can’t play gambling games,” Yixuan replied, placing checkers on the board. “But intellectual ones – we can.”
“Is checkers an intellectual game?”
“Difficult enough to make your gray matter move,” he smiled. “Easy enough to talk while playing. Do you play black or white pieces?”
“White.”
“Okay,” Yixuan turned the board with white checkers towards him. “There are following rules: if you remove my checker – you can ask me whatever question. If I do that then I’ll ask. We answer honestly.”
Yibo was looking heavily in Yixuan’s eyes. At that moment he didn’t know by himself if he was going to play fairly or not. He licked lips and said: “Okay. But everything that comes up here stays between us and isn’t conveyed to anyone.”
“I give you my word,” Yixuan was serious.
The game started.
First three turns they were just moving checkers on the board, building up future combinations. Yixuan took Yibo’s checker first. Smiled and looked at him.
“Did you lie to me when you told me you’d been looking for me the day before? That’s not true, right? You weren’t looking for me, were you?”
Ugh... hell. Okay, he knew that anyway, further denying made no sense.
“I weren’t,” Yibo said heavily. Yixuan nodded as though to himself, like I knew that anyway. But Yixuan’s checker was at risk and Yibo couldn’t let the chance go.
He didn’t know what to ask and not to ask Yixuan about. Actually, he had a thousand questions. First and foremost, about Xiao Zhan, but he certainly knew he couldn’t ask about him. So Yibo chose one of the least interesting and simple questions, offhandedly, to check the guy’s reaction:
“What position are you at here? Are you just ”John’s son” or are you “The Crown Prince”?”
Yixuan gave a hum, even laughed. Leant back in the chair, fixed his shirt’s collar.
“Everyone here except you knows the answer for this question. The question is really simple. If we conversed a little longer you would understand that by yourself. The Crown Prince – sounds really rough, regarding our community and a situation but... I guess it's true. Rather yes, I am the Crown Prince.”
He said that with sadness, without a touch of pride. As if that was a burden on his shoulders. Yibo surprisingly noted that and didn’t notice how with right the next turn Yixuan took two of his checkers. The guy even exhaled shortly in unexpectancy.
Fuck, he should be more attentive.
Yixuan playfully raised a brow.
“Two checkers – two questions, Yibo. Am I right?”
“Okay,” he involuntarily agreed, getting ready to answer two times in a row. Yixuan bit a lower lip and asked him directly: “Were you looking for my father?”
Fuck. Yibo pursed lips. He wanted to play fairly, he really did. Sorry, Yixuan.
“I was,” he even tried not to blink, while lying. But Yixuan seemed to expect those words, nodded and sighed. Yibo was silently waiting for the second question. The guy was thinking but then, instead of asking, started to speak himself:
“Do you know what William said about you, when you came to us? He said: “He’s looking for something, rushing and striving somewhere in his mind.” That was his impression of you. What are you looking for, Yibo? Why did you come to us?”
I’m looking for Xiao Zhan, flashed in his head but he said out loudly: “I don’t know.”
“Yibo, we’ve agreed to tell the truth!”
“I don’t know!” he raised his voice and pressed on. They had constant eye contact with Yixuan.
Yixuan didn’t believe him and Yibo saw that he didn’t. The guy pursed lips and looked even slightly offended, but Yibo didn’t care. He was ready to tell his “mentor” everything: about his sins, orientation, childhood, parents... the deepest fears – you’re welcome, but he won’t tell anyone about Xiao Zhan. Not about him.
“Well,” Yixuan resigned himself.
Four more turns were for nothing and then a white checker of Yibo flew from the board. Before the question Yixuan was peering him long, maybe, was choosing a question too, and finally asked: “Be honest: do you want to become a Brother?”
Yibo gave it a thought. If not for the situation with Xiao Zhan then he wouldn’t care about this community and their stupid rules and everything going on here. But it was useful to become a Brother at least because he would be able to talk to Zhan without any hindrance. So Yibo answered sincerely: “Yes, I really do.”
Yixuan smiled: “Yes... you are an ambitious guy, right, Yibo?”
“It’s my turn now,” Yibo nodded at the board where Yixuan’s black checker was in danger, “and my question.”
He took it from the board and asked Yixuan boldly, not being afraid of anything already: “What is it like to be “John’s son”?”
The guy saw that Yixuan didn’t like this question. His facial expression changed, hardened, he seemed not really willing to answer but the man got over himself:
“I don’t like it. That’s... hard. Very responsible and... scary.”
“Why scary?” Yibo even leaned forward for the answer but the man gave him a slight smile and quoted: “That’s my turn, now.”
Yibo felt disappointed but nodded: that was fair. Three turns again without any losses and then the situation repeated: Yibo sacrificed his checker to kill another one of Yixuan’s pieces later. They asked each other questions again: “What impression does my father give?”
Yibo didn’t expect this question from Yixuan at all. He raised a brow in surprise: “Why are you asking me about it?”
“You have...” Yixuan pulled that and got embarrassed a little, “you still have some clear sight. Like everyone else perceives him in the community – I do know. I’d like to see what impression he makes on a new person.”
“Mm, okay,” Yibo didn’t really want to lie about it. Probably, it would be a right decision to say some quivering nonsense but he’d already lied so much today. And now, after all that he heard from the guy, it seemed to Yibo that Yixuan would accept his words right, “He looks like... a businessman. Or a showman. You know, like some coach who gives presentations or tells on TV something about how to become rich. Something like that.”
Yixuan chuckled mirthlessly. He was pondering about something just to himself, looking at nothing, and Yibo asked a questions quietly, having took his checker: “And how do you accept your father?”
Wang Yibo didn’t expect that Yixuan would decide to answer absolutely honestly and sincere: “I don’t see him as “John – the leader of the community “Children of Salvation”. For me he is a father. Yes, very strict, masterful in many ways, often – indifferent. He looks at me like at his project. Sometimes I’m afraid of him, sometimes he annoys me. But, of course, I like him.”
Yibo didn’t expect such frankness and didn’t know how to perceive it. Why did Yixuan decide to open his heart to him? Was that a pseudo-confession or did he want to say out for a long time but didn’t have a chance? The guy didn’t tell him anything else, was moving checkers silently, Yibo answered, having sacrificed his checker again for a future victory. Yixuan saw that and smirked. He couldn’t not move Yibo’s checker though he understood that Yibo would take two of his then. They were looking at each other, Yibo was waiting for his question.
For a moment it seemed to him that Yixuan didn’t want to play anymore. As though he regretted his frankness but, to his credit, he didn’t cowardly retire and decided to play to the end although he understood he was about to lose.
“And you’re an ambitious guy, aren’t you? Is this why you want to become a Brother?”
“Yes,” Yibo shrugged, “I like achieving success in anything I do. I don’t like losing.”
“I already got that.”
Yibo silently took two black checkers from the board, his checker turned into king and the guy quoted in his turn: “Two checkers – two questions, right, Yixuan?”
“Ask,” he pursed lips.
Yibo saw that, maybe, he didn’t have to put so much pressure on Yixuan but he already got into a rage. Who said that checkers is not a gambling game? Enough, if you know how to play. He chuck it all up and dared: “Have you ever thought about leaving the community?”
Yixuan laughed. He was no longer glad that he offered Yibo to play with him.
“But it was me who should have got you talking!” he noticed.
“Sorry,” Yibo smiled guiltily.
Yixuan gave a hum and replied: “Yes, I thought about that,” and then added, “as everyone who lives here, I think.”
This moment Yibo remembered about Xiao Zhan. He’d also told him he thought about leaving the community. And what if he didn’t mean that he was really going to do that? All in all, thinking and doing were two different things. Why didn’t it come to Yibo’s head earlier?
That caught him off guard. That was worth thinking about. Therefore Yibo asked his second question randomly, the answer wasn’t really important to him:
“And you? Do you want me to join the Brotherhood?”
But Yixuan was capable of surprising: “I think I do. Moreover, you will have to do it.”
Yibo lifted surprised eyes on him, but the guy just laughed slyly, showing with all his look that he wasn’t going to continue.
Then Yibo sacrificed another checker so he would be able to take a black checker of Yixuan with his king. There weren’t so many black checkers on the board anyway.
But this time it was Yixuan’s turn to ask a question. He shrugged as if saying “I already asked everything I wanted” so he just clarified: “Tell me, our rules really annoy you, right? And you are a curious guy, huh? You came to the Family block just out of curiosity and because... mm... it’s so good to break rules, right?”
Yibo gave a hum and decided to be nasty (they were playing, after all, and he wasn’t going to show all cards for nothing): “Those are two questions, if not three already. Choose one.”
Yixuan pursed lips just a bit. Yibo obviously pissed him off but that only built up his energy and he commented:
“I know the answer for the first question anyway. I see it in your eyes. Well. Did you come to the Familial block just out of curiosity and were led by adrenalin or were you really trying to find someone?”
“The first,” Yibo lied without blinking an eye, took his black checker and asked the previous question, “Why do I have to become a Brother?”
Yixuan fixed cuffs on his sleeves, gave a hum: “Actually, I wanted to talk with you about it anyway.”
“I’m all ears,” the guy said ironically, but, in fact, that was true.
“As you’ve found out today, in the eyes of Brothers and Sisters of the community I am some kind of a Crown Prince. That won’t be an exaggeration to say that I’ve been prepared for that since childhood. Especially after my older brother’s death.”
“What?!”
Yixuan lifted a surprised sight on Yibo but then smiled.
“Sorry, Yibo. I just forget all the time that you’ve not been here long. I’ve gotten used to the fact everyone knows everything about me. You might’ve heard that my father had a first wife, Mary, who died.”
“Yes, Rose told me about it.”
“They had a son, Jack, he died when he was a teenager. It seems he had something like cardiac insufficiency...”
“Oh...” Yibo was confused. “I’m sorry about it...”
“You don’t have to,” Yixuan shaked his head calmly. “I didn’t know him. But I became the Crown Prince, as you say, only after Jack’s death. Hm, that’s it... This year my father decided that I’m old enough to take a ward. That came in handy that you and Ron appeared. It’s not every year that men come to us. You would get to me in any case because... because they wouldn’t give me Ron. Can you guess why?”
Wheels were turning in Yibo’s brain so loudly. He gave it a thought, biting his lips, guessed: “...too unpredictable?”
“Exactly,” Yixuan didn’t look fun at all. “Ron is a good lad, but it seems he has some mental disorder. And it can affect something. And the Crown Prince can’t have failures, do you get it? The ideal mentoring from the very first attempt. The ideal member of the society, raised in a record short time. What could be better? What could prove better that I am the ideal candidate for the place of my father?”
“He is gradually preparing you as a replacement for himself!”
“My father is not a young man, after all,” Yixuan nodded in agreement. “That is why I asked if you wanted to become a Brother. Because you’ll probably be it, very soon.”
Yibo thought over what he’d heard. Yixuan didn’t hurry him though sun’d already set and they were going to announce a bedtime soon.
“Why are you so honest with me, Yixuan?” he said finally.
On the board there were just five black checkers and, before answering, he himself took one of the checkers from the board, showing that Yibo had a limit.
“Because that’s not been a fair game from my side since the very beginning, Yibo. You would become a Brother, no matter if you want that or not, ready or not. Unfortunately, I don’t actually have time to lead you along your Way. Express-course on joining the Brotherhood, to cover up all inconsistencies just a little, smooth things over... To be honest, I don’t like it myself. I’d been really worried before the meeting with you... What if you turned out to be honest and straightforward, naive like Ron? Then it wouldn’t work out. But I got a smart, risky rule-breaker, and I’m not ashamed to open up to you. It seems, you would get it right.”
They were looking at each other and Yibo involuntarily felt sympathy for Yixuan. As though fate gave him a present in form of Yixuan, and Yibo was able to appreciate it:
“I’m ready to take the express-course if there is not much time left, as you say it. I want to. It’s interesting to me. What should I do?”
Yixuan carefully took another checker, twirled it in his fingers:
“To learn the theory by heart, of course. To not be caught on breaking rules. Do not get into conflict with anyone, to behave decently. To say what they want to hear from you. And if something feels like a bone in your throat – to endure that and pretend that everything is alright. Taming rebels takes too much time.”
An unusual thought came into Yibo’s mind and he voiced it immediately: “Is that why Fred’s been a laborer for two years?”
Yixuan chuckled and threw another black checker from the board. There were left two: “Smart and sharp-witted. Mother saw that in you instantly. “With a ward like that you would achieve your goals fast and easy,” she told me then. I agree with her.”
Damn. He liked Yixuan more and more. For the first time after two weeks and a half Yibo felt he really shared the same page with someone. He would use Yixuan to get closer to Zhan, Yixuan would use him to get closer to the power and to get support of the community. An equivalent exchange and Yibo wasn’t offended. Vice versa, he appreciated that Yixuan was honest to him from the very beginning.
There left several white and two black checkers on the board. The guys looked at them and Yibo said: “We don’t have to finish...”
“No, ask me, if you want to know something,” he smiled politely. “I’ll answer.”
“What do you actually think about this express-course?”
Yixuan sighed heavily: “Do you remember I told you that I wished you would’ve liked to stay here yourself and would’ve understood what a beautiful place it is?”
“I do.”
“I didn’t lie. I really think so. What do I actually think about it? I’m really annoyed.”
Yibo was listening to him silently and caught himself on the thought that Yixuan really had no one to talk to in the community. Among John’s admirers who would he share his feelings with?
“At first I even dreamt of mentoring. I wanted to do something important finally, to contribute to another person. I know, I could have. But they didn’t give me a chance. “We don’t have time for that, dear. Everything should go smoothly. We shouldn’t drag it for so long, to give others reasons to doubt and spread rumors.”
Yixuan, quoting, imitated his mother a little bit, as Yibo understood.
“And I am angry with it,” he went on. “When we talk about my feelings then I am angry, annoyed...”
“But you still follow their lead and dance to their tune although you’re going to become their leader!” Yibo blurted out and threw the last black checker from the board by himself, leaning forward, “And what do you want? What does Zhou Yixuan want? Not John’s son and not the Crown Prince and just Yixuan?”
Here Yibo understood he crossed the border. It was too early to ask things like that. Yixuan might not answer this question even to himself. Yibo saw it instantly on his changed face expression, clenched fists and protruding muscles.
“You don’t have to,” Yibo quickly retreated, calming down. “You don’t have to answer this question now.”
Yixuan calmed: unclenched fists, straightened his shirt. But the conversation was over, they both understood that.
“Go, I’ll see you off to the house of laborers,” the guy told Yibo and they left the library, having put all the checkers under the shelf.

And the next day, on Thursday, Xiao Zhan came into the communal dining at lunchtime.

Chapter Text

Thursday morning started as usual and there were no signs of worries.
Wang Yibo and other laborers were laying out the roof till lunch, Fred showed him how to lay draining channels. They were promised to get some breaded fish and a beef bone soup for lunch so he was dreaming about it since morning.
When the blessed break came and the guy headed with others to the communal dining, Ron joined them, telling how he’d been helping at the Domestic block today and how many beautiful women he’d seen. They got their plates from read-handed Hilda and quickly started their meal.
Actually, Yibo didn’t even see how Xiao Zhan came in, he just heard how Brothers started greeting him from all angles and lifted his head up.
Yes, that was him. Oh Lord…
In beige trousers and an old checkered untucked shirt, he smiled nicely at Brothers and shook their hands. His bruise on a cheekbone was almost gone, but a crust on the lip was still at the place.
“Xiao Zhan! Xiao Zhan’s come! What brought you here, Xiao Zhan? Can it be true that you decided to share the meal with us, Zhan?” they told him from all sides.
“Yes-yes, mother went to help women at the Domestic block, lunch’s not made so I decided...” and here his glance came across Yibo and he choked on air, coughing.
Yibo just sat himself with a piece of fish in his mouth he was chewing on, stared at Zhan although he understood he’d better lower his head and pretend that nothing special happened. Ron twitched near him and pulled his shirt’s sleeve: “Yibo, look, it is Xiao Zhan indeed! You wanted...”
“Yes, Ron,” Yibo interrupted him hastily. “Yes-yes, that's Xiao Zhan, the choir director. Eat quietly.”
Ron got upset a little. He looked at the coughing Xiao Zhan, then turned his eyes to Yibo who was peering at his plate again and then came back to eating.
Xiao Zhan was given water and he just couldn’t stop his cough. He was placed carefully at the table closest to the door, and was given a portion of soup and fish with boiled sticky rice. But the food stuck in his throat and the men constantly gave Yibo a look sideways as if trying to make sure that it was really him and not his hallucination. Xiao Zhan was slowly eating beef soup with a spoon, understanding, he was looking at Yibo too often…
...and Yibo perfectly saw it with his peripheral vision. He finished food and was just sitting now, placing his hands on his knees, looking at the table. His heart was beating so hard. That’s it, they met with Xiao Zhan. And what’s next?
“Have you all finished?” Fred asked. “Luciano, hurry up, we won’t wait for you.”
“Ron’s not finished yet either!” he kicked back but Fred meaningly clenched a fist.
“Don’t look at him. William will take him.”
Finally, when Luciano finished the meal, all laborers stood from their tables. It was time to get back to the building site. Yibo intentionally lingered, getting out of the table the last to enclose the line of men going outside. They went accurately past Xiao Zhang’s table. No, even better: past him himself, almost knocking the sitting man’s shoulder.
Yibo tried not to look at Xiao Zhan with all his might, getting closer, but at the last moment he eventually turned his gaze at him, meeting with his big brown eyes almost from close range.
And then his legs brought him outside under the blazing sun, and he even seemed to sigh with relief. He only heard behind his back:
“Zhan, you look somehow pale. Maybe you need some more water?”

Yibo came back to the building site absolutely confused. His body seemed to live by itself, separately from his mind. His hands were working mechanically, carrying wooden beams that would be the roof arch. Yibo was doing everything quickly and in silence but he himself was in the only moment as though he was stuck. He was stuck there with Xiao Zhan, when they saw each other and after that when he was passing by. So close... But they couldn’t even talk to each other, couldn’t even touch each other…
Was Xiao Zhan going to do anything? He understood exactly that Yibo was Yibo, though for three weeks at the ranch he lost some weight and got tanned. Was he going to do anything? Was he able to do anything? What if he was bound hand and foot with some prohibitions, punishments?
And if Xiao Zhan didn’t do anything, what should Yibo do? And why wouldn’t he do that: was he afraid, couldn’t he or didn’t really want that? How to understand? And what did Yibo have to do? Did he have to? Maybe it was better just to try to get out of here until it’s too late?
Thoughts messed in his head, stinged him painfully, and tried to blow up his braincase. Yibo decided for some reason that he would see Xiao Zhan next time at dinner time, and that he would come again. But he didn’t come.
Again a heap of thoughts was flashing through his mind every second: why didn’t he? Didn’t he have the reason to come or did someone notice their glances between each other or maybe he didn’t want to see him? What if that was that last one? What should he do then?
“Yibo, you look pale,” noticed one of the laborers, Morris.
“Yeah... feel a little sick,” he said. Fred looked at him sideways but didn’t say anything.
In the evening Yibo was still waiting for Xiao Zhan, some sign or whatever…
But the evening finished as usual, fatigue took over him and he fell asleep.

Friday started as usual too, but all Yibo’s thoughts, since morning, were about Xiao Zhan. He was waiting for him, was waiting while he was working – what if he accidentally came past their building site? But he didn’t. The day dragged on long and boring.
Finally, his organism got tired of being anxious. Yibo told himself that relationships between two people are always steps towards each other. He’d made his first step. If Xiao Zhan was going to avoid him and ignore his presence here – so okay, it’s his choice. Then he’d spend the rest of his vacation somehow trying to escape from here. He didn’t still decide how and it would be a big hurt for Yixuan and Ron but he wasn’t really going to spend the rest of his life at this beautiful ranch.
Yibo gave himself a deadline till the end of the week. Friday, Saturday and Sunday – three days for Xiao Zhan to explain to him that phone call. And if he didn’t appear in front of him then Yibo would go away.
At the lunch break Xiao Zhan came to the dining room again.
Yibo instantly forgot about his meal, just messing with a fork in his plate trying not to look at him too often.
Xiao Zhan sat on his previous place to Brothers and they welcomed him, slapped his shoulder: “You’ve come here so often, Brother Zhan! Did your mother go to communal work again?”
“Sometimes it’s better to eat in a friendly company,” he replied with a smile.
Yibo understood that Zhan came here for him. If he wanted to ignore him so – he wouldn’t do that. He just couldn’t relax and eat calmly, he sat like on pins and needles waiting for something…
Bu he’d not expect what happened next.
All the windows in the dining room were open out of the heat, and suddenly a weak whistle came from the street and at the same time from all the windows into the room were thrown live chickens. That was a surprise for everyone, men jumped from their places, and a joyful laugh was heard on the street – Brothers saw backs of boys, running away as fast as they could.
“You, little devils!” William shouted from the window, shaking his fist at them. “I’ll recognize all of you and personally whip your asses!”
Brothers dashed to catch the chickens but they were surprisingly fast, ran and flew around all the dining. There was a real mess. Someone shouted, someone laughed, and someone chased chickens. Zhan jumped from his place to, laughed and apologized:
“Sorry, they’re my students playing pranking! Sorry, I didn’t look after them. Sorry, we’ll catch all of them... Catch that one, catch it!”
All laborers jumped from their places and started to catch birds. Yibo understood that it wasn’t for nothing, he stood up too, trying to seize the moment and get close to Xiao Zhan.
But he was ahead of him. He sent him a chicken like a ball in a football game, Yibo started to catch it like a goalkeeper, protecting the gate. They bumped into each other, and the guy felt how Zhan quickly put something in his hand.
“Sorry,” he said and got under the table for the chicken.
“Nevermind...” said Yibo, clenching a fist. That was a piece of paper. A note. All that mess with chickens just to hand him a note?
He put it in the pocket, not unclenching. That was only for him.
Four chickens were finally caught. Birds weren’t really happy. Fred gathered all his workers and led them to the building site. Brothers remained to help to bring everything in order and put shifted benches back to their places.
Having come back to the working place, Yibo asked to go to the restroom. Fred frowned:
“Five minutes, go, fast.”
The nearest restroom was in the house of laborers and Yibo jogged there. Although he was alone in the room he still locked the door just in case. With almost trembling hands Yibo took out the folded piece of squared paper. A little one, where in a neat handwriting was written:
“Today, 22:30, the building site.”
So little and so much at the same time. Yibo reread it three times, his heart was racing out of anxiety. He repeated to himself again and again as if he could forget it.
Zhan appointed him a date. Today, at 22:30, at the building site. That’s it, that’s it…
What he’d been waiting for a month finally happened: they would see each other and talk normally! They would clear up everything. That awful limbo state he was living with the last weeks would finally go. Well, at least just a bit.
Wang Yibo soaked the note under the water tap, made a tight ball and, just to be sure, flushed it down the toilet.

How was he supposed to get to the building site after the bedtime hour?
His head was full of these thoughts for the whole day. The best way was to escape from the toilet, using a small window. But Yibo wasn’t sure his shoulders would get through it. Therefore he even decided to check: opened the window, stood on the toilet, clung to the window frame, pulled himself up. Shoulders seem to be able to squeeze, there was hope. The rest of the day he was pretending to feel sick: ran to the toilet, pressed a hand on his stomach and winced. Ron was really concerned about him:
“Should I go to the medical post and take some pills for you?”
“Thank you, Ron, don’t worry. I just ate something wrong, it’ll be over soon...”
Fred was looking at him sideways all day, but didn’t say anything.
In the evening, after the bedtime hour, he obediently climbed to his upper bunk. Pretended to sleep, although he wouldn’t fall asleep even if he wanted, he was really so anxious.
Their dorm sinked into a sleepy silence, someone snored, someone sniffled. Yibo was sure that even Fred was asleep too but still demonstratively moaned while getting down from his bed. Having worn his boots, he went to the toilet and locked the door.
He made the same trick with the window and safely squeezed outside, jumping. Good that it wasn’t high.
It was absolutely dark outside, of course, there were no street lighters in the settlement. Just a natural light of stars and the moon that helped Yibo on his way to the building site. He felt uneasy out of that dazzling darkness of the night and a silence around and that he was seriously breaking the rules. It was not just coming into the Family block. Breaking the Curfew was a more serious offense.
Yibo tried to walk as quietly as he could, almost tiptoed into the house under construction, and stopped, leaning to the wall. He didn’t see damn anything. He was worried that Zhan and him would just miss each other in such darkness. The guy hesitantly called:
“Xiao Zhan?”
But there was silence around him, he obviously came to the building site first. Yibo tried to listen carefully to everything that was happening outside. It only seemed that the desert was dead. In fact it was alive, was full of sounds, you should only listen: a dangerous brak scorpion was hiding somewhere, legless lizards were crawling underground, a sandgrouse bird could suddenly fly up, the Gila monster was getting ready for the hunt, a predatory chuckawalla would run past, a crotalus rattled with its tale. The desert was alive and was moving. But the steps of a human getting closer to the building site sounded very clear anyway.
Yibo hid in the farthest corner for some reason and didn’t breathe. He wasn’t sure that it was Xiao Zhan. He wasn’t sure of anything. Someone entered the room, tripped, hissed and a small torch lit up with a dim yellow light, cutting through the darkness and highlighting Xiao Zhan, and Wang Yibo as well.
“Zhan...” Wang Yibo sighed with relief and went out to him.
“Yibo,” Zhan’s voice wasn’t happy at all, and rather vice versa. It seemed that Xiao Zhan was annoyed. Oh, damn, no, he was angry. Really angry.
“What the hell, Wang Yibo?!” Xiao Zhan put a torch on the pile of cement near the doorway and went closer. “What the hell are you doing here?!”
“Xiao Zhan...” he pulled plaintively but, in fact, he should’ve expected such a reaction from Xiao Zhan. “We’ve not seen each other for almost a month...”
“I told you already by the phone that I don’t want to see you anymore and that you should leave me alone!” Zhan didn’t yell, he couldn’t yell, but a hissing roar reflected enough of his anger. “I told you already, directly, so why the...”
“You told it not me,” Yibo interrupted him, “but Wenhan.”
Zhan broke off, breathed heavily, looking at Yibo and then, finally, said:
“I just confused. That was just a mistake...”
“The hell no!” Yibo was getting angry. “Don’t tell me you confused the name of a guy you’d hung out two weeks with and had sex! Don't be ridiculous!”
A tension was building up between them, the real electricity, Zhan suddenly pushed his chest with hands, pressing to the wall, hung over and placed hands on either side of him.
“Anyway, it’s over between us, Wang Yibo! Why the hell did you come here? Did you want me to tell you that in person?”
“I did,” Yibo said with emotion. “I have the right! Tell me it personally again, say it again!”
And then Yibo understood that Xiao Zhan was looking at his lips. No, he almost got stuck, just like that time, at the cinema, and the guy was struck with a sudden intuitive flash: he wanted him. Zhan still wanted him. And Yibo followed his first impulse, leaned forward and pressed lips against his, embracing Xiao Zhan and pulling him into himself. And Xiao Zhan succumbed! Moaned shortly and opened mouth for him, answered but then, first, push him away, got angry again:
“Wang Yibo! We’ve broken up! That’s all! Go away! Go away from here.”
“Zhan...”
“You’re just a laborer, you still can go... Go away, please, this place is not for you...”
“It’s all about the place, yeah? About the community, not us?”
“Tell William you want to go. Or just stop working, become lazy. They’ll let you go themselves. Tell Rose that you disappointed, you can even tell them you like boys. Did they give you a mentor already?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, damn...” Xiao Zhan took two steps back, bit his lip. “Who?”
“Yixuan.”
“Fuck!” he looked really desperate. “Yibo, you can’t stay here! Talk to Yixuan, tell him you’ve made a mistake... Damn...”
“No one knows that we’re acquainted, Zhan,” said Yibo, “so if you worry about it...”
“I worry about a lot of things, Yibo. You don’t know so much. Please, just go. Don’t cause problems for me, okay?”
“You were limping that day, at the concert. I saw. And a bruise on your face, and a lip... What happened, Zhan?”
“Nothing, Yibo. It’s none of your business, see? Go. How long have you been here?”
“Three weeks...”
“Oh... You what, did you come here right after I...”
“Yes, Zhan. It wasn’t easy to get to you...”
“Didn’t you understand what I told you, Yibo? Go. Get outta here. We won’t be together.”
Yibo didn’t know why he wasn’t afraid or offended or hurt. He heard “go” and smiled like a fool. He absolutely didn’t believe Xiao Zhan, didn’t feel that he really wanted Yibo to go. If only he could calm him down and talk normally, if only he could show Zhan that he could still trust him, if only he could hold him close again…
“Zhan...”
“It’s unbearable,” he roared and took the torch. “Go away, Yibo. I have nothing else to tell you.”
He turned off the light and went out first, ducking into the darkness of the night. And Yibo was left in this darkness alone.

Chapter Text

On Saturday morning Wang Yibo woke up unreasonably happy. For a minute, before the hated march began to sound, he was listening to his feelings, smiling into the pillow. Xiao Zhan’s driven him away, had told him they couldn’t be together, had told him to go away from the community – but Yibo didn’t see anything else behind that but a concern about him. And more, how he had involuntarily succumbed to his kiss, had opened to him, having not even realized what was going on…
Oh, it wasn’t a good idea to arouse right now…
But the moment he heard the morning march his arousal was relieved by itself.
Of course, Yibo decided that before Xiao Zhan and him didn’t talk normally, he wouldn’t go anywhere. And even if that was just his stubbornness, related to his first love, he didn’t want to simply go.
There was a Cleanup Day at the building site. Yibo knew for some reason that after the morning meeting with John Xiao Zhan would come to the site among others to help. And it turned out like that.
The man brought with him old working trousers, that were already stained all over, changed right there, at the building site, together with other men, having worn on top just a tank top. Laborers were about to finish with the fundamental building works, they had only to lay down the roof and remove all construction debris to prepare the house for decorations.
Yibo was sent right under the scorching sun, to lay out the roof sloopings with colored slate. Xiao Zhan volunteered to work in the same area. There were four people besides them so they didn’t have time to talk.
Yibo’s heart twitched when he saw that Xiao Zhan was climbing up to him. Zhan gave him an angry look as if saying “are you still here?”, but Wang Yibo didn't cave in to his intimidating look. If Zhan didn’t want to be near, he wouldn’t have come, and wouldn't have worked in the same area with him.
They were working in silence, barbeque was being cooked below, people were running back and forth. Once, passing by, Yibo intentionally knocked Zhan with a shoulder. Next time, as if occasionally, offered him water. Xiao Zhan pretended not to notice him and refused water but then suddenly called Yibo when they were about to finish working:
“Hey, you, what’s your name?”
Even the voice that Zhan talked to him in front of others seemed alien to Yibo.
“Who? Me?” he asked just to make sure. “Yibo. Wang Yibo.”
“Come here, Wang Yibo.”
Yibo carefully approached Zhan from the roof sloping. When he got close the man pointed at a sheet of slate.
“Tell me, what is this? Do you see?”
The sheet lay crookedly though Yibo knew he’d laid it himself and was sure he’d done everything well. And it was written there with a white chalk:
“Tomorrow, 22:30, here.”
“I see,” replied Yibo.
“Then do everything well and fix it,” Zhan told him and went away.
Yibo fixed a sheet and precisely erased the inscription.
When it was lunchtime men washed their faces and hands (women held towels for them and poured water on them with a ladle). Laborers separated from Brothers. The first sat at the side, having gotten their bowls with chicken and pieces of fish and with little roasted potatoes. Brothers talked to Sisters, then John and Yixuan came. Their appearance was greeted with cheerful applause. Women swarmed John, each of them wanted to serve him. Yixuan got his plate and came to Yibo, slapped his shoulder:
“Have you worked well, Yibo?”
“Not bad. But it seems I got sunburnt,” he touched his neck, laughing.
“If anything, Ron will bring you an ointment from the medical post, won’t you, Ron?”
The man came to them after his errands too and all that time had been throwing away the construction debris from the floors:
“I will, Yixuan! I always care about Yibo, and he cares about me. When he was sick I also offered to bring Yibo some pills but he doesn’t like to be treated.”
Yixuan turned a surprising sight to Yibo.
“Yeah, I ate something wrong, I was going to the toilet the whole day but now it’s okay,” he shrugged and diligently changed the topic. “When are you coming to talk to me, Yixuan?”
“Tomorrow, right after breakfast. In the evening, as you know, we have a Sunday event and in the morning we can talk.”
It turned out that not to look at Xiao Zhan when he was in close proximity – that was quite a challenge. Xiao Zhan could handle it perfectly. He was talking with Brothers, with Yixuan, with John and even a little bit with Sisters – he wasn’t looking at Yibo at all. It seemed he’d already overcome the first shock and now was in control over himself.
That wasn’t really surprising, taking into account what a place he grew up at. Xiao Zhan might have been good at hiding his real feelings. Maybe, he would be a good actor, who knows? Wang Yibo had a thought for the first time: was Xiao Zhan real? Even at the time they had sex he’d shown him different sides of himself...

Well, Xiao Zhan appointed him for the second date after all. It would barely be telling off or demands to go away again. Maybe, they would finally talk normally. He was anxious for the whole day and couldn’t wait for the moment they’d meet, but there was a long and the only free day ahead and Yixuan came to him first as he’d promised.
They took a walk and for most of the time talked about John’s book. Yibo reported to him how he understood it, what remained unclear to him, Yixuan corrected him and showed how to understand it right. They came to the library again, Yixuan gave him more of John’s books. It seemed, the leader of this community suffered from graphomania, not otherwise.
“John R. Cole: Our Way. From beginning to end.”
“John R. Cole: What Salvation is.”
“John R. Cole: About the importance of children and Family in the community.”
“Yixuan,” Yibo asked with a glimpse of insecurity in his voice, when he got all those books, “am I supposed to learn all of them just for two weeks?”
“Not for two,” he replied, “but we don’t really have much time. We should do it till December 11.”
“And what will be on December 11?”
“My birthday,” he smiled. “My mothers thinks it’s a good time to announce to everyone that a ward of her son is ready to take the exam and join the Brotherhood.”
“It’s less than three months till December 11...”
“Will you do it, Yibo?” Yixuan looked him in the eyes and Yibo suddenly felt a twinge of guilt.
Damn. That feeling was completely out of place now. He just understood what hopes Yixuan lay on him and diligently agreed with him and at the same time thought how to get out of here and take Xiao Zhan with him as well.
“I think I will,” Yibo said and smiled, understanding that he wasn’t a good person himself.

Yibo didn’t pretend anymore that his stomach ached to sneak away through the window in the restroom. He knew he was able to squeeze through the window frame, and moreover, he knew that laborers fell asleep immediately when only the clock struck ten. It was partly thanks to the working regime, partly – out of the permanent fatigue. And they had nothing to do after the bedtime hour, after all. The lights were turned off everywhere, it was forbidden to go anywhere, to talk loudly. So everyone tried to fall asleep as fast as possible to have a longer nap.
But that evening Fred couldn’t fall asleep. He’d seen his mentor on Saturday when he came to them at the building site and his mentor might have promised to come to his ward the next day. But he didn’t. Fred looked down in the dumps for the whole day. He demanded to see Rose from William, argued with him, and was outraged. It even seemed to Yibo that he cried, having locked in the restroom.
Laborers didn’t discuss it among themselves and didn’t touch Fred, being afraid to cause the conflict. And at 10pm, after the bedtime hour Fred didn’t even think about falling asleep: he was going back and forth around the dorm, stood near the window, was sitting on his bed, pondering. The time was passing. No one dared to make remarks or tell him something like: hey, you, go to sleep, stop pacing here and there. He was their headman, after all. Someone still fell asleep despite Fred’s constant sad sighs in the rooms. Yibo was anxious in his turn and constantly glanced at the clock on the wall. It was difficult to see through the gloom of the room but it seemed that the clock was almost at 22:30 and Yibo decided to calm the man somehow.
He got down from his bunk, yawning, approaching the laborer who stood near the window:
“Can’t sleep, Fred?”
The man gave him an unfriendly look sideways and said through his teeth:
“That’s none of your business. You have to sleep now too. Go to bed.”
“I can’t sleep either,” Yibo whispered to him, kept silent and then asked, “If we go outside and sit on the steps will it be violating the rules?”
They sat incredibly close to each other because of the narrow steps. They were both wearing their pajamas, and didn't even have to wear anything on top. Nights in New Mexico were dry and warm this year.
“I wish I could smoke now...” Fred said that and Yibo looked at him in surprise. He didn’t expect Fred to... well, to open up? Maybe. But that was a good sign, yeah?
“Did you smoke before coming here?” Yibo asked just to start the conversation.
“Not only me,” Fred chuckled. “Rose was a chainsmoker too, and William... Did you see he’s always chewing on toothpicks? Luciano told me that a nicotine patch is always on demand at the medical post.”
“Mm...” Yibo dragged that not knowing how to get to the conversation about his mentor but Fred suddenly asked by himself:
“You seem not to have had any harmful addictions in that life, huh? Lucky you are.”
“Maybe,” Yibo said confusedly, and Fred asked him again: “Why did you come here, Wang Yibo?”
Oh, well... so should we start from the very beginning? Alright. The guy gave a hum: “I was looking for John... To be exact, I thought I was looking for John.”
“He didn’t impress you either, did he?” Fred grinned.
Yibo got sincerely surprised: “Either?”
“I remember I was even a little bit disappointed when I met him. I had a “crisis of faith” or something like that...”
Yibo held his breath: “And now?”
“Now...” Fred looked at his boots and picked out a lump of dry dirt from the tip of his shoe. “Now, maybe, the same. I just can’t be here anymore. Among laborers. Hate it.”
“Why have they kept you here so long?”
“I don’t know,” he responded desperately. “Maybe, my mentor just doesn’t care about my Way. Maybe, they just need me as a headman-builder who can handle the newbies and look after you here like a babysitter and teach you how to work. I worked at the building site for half of my life. But maybe, I’m not ready for real. Wrath is my weakest point. Rose’s always telling me this. That I have to learn how to obey and restrain myself. Maybe, she’s right.”
Yibo was silent for a bit, thinking over his answer, and asked quietly: “Why don’t you turn back then?”
It might’ve been a rather silly question. Yibo understood that Fred was quite stubborn. He’d spent two years achieving his goal and still didn’t turn back although he wanted, many times.
The man grinned and answered with a pressure, slightly intimidating: “Because I’m worthy, got it? I’m worthy of being among Brothers, that’s it. I’m not worse than they are. I am not!”
Yibo was silent for a bit and then said what he’d started all this conversation for: “You know, Fred, I’ll talk about you with Yixuan.”
He glanced at him in disbelief, said through his teeth: “Why? We’re not friends.”
“Because you’re worthy,” Yibo replied and shrugged. “I respect it.”
Fred bit his lips from inside, then finally looked at Yibo, trying to understand if he was serious or not: “Are you saying it for real?” and he heard in these words “can I trust you?”.
“It might not be at the very first meeting,” Yibo said sincerely. “But the moment I see fit, I promise, I’ll do it.”
Fred was peering him for some time, then chuckled and smiled involuntary: “I’ll be grateful if you talk to him. Especially if... if it works out.”
“I hope,” Yibo stood up first, dusting off his pants. “Let’s go sleep, Fred? The workweek starts tomorrow.”
The man nodded, stood up after him and they came into the dorm. Seizing the opportunity, Yibo came closer to the clock: damn, that was almost midnight already!
He climbed up to bed and pretended to sleep. Fred lay down too.
Yibo prayed in his mind that Xiao Zhan would wait for him. The guy didn’t want to miss a chance to meet him! He tried not to toss so that the bed wouldn’t screech, barely lay ten minutes and then again got down, approached Fred’s bunk and called quietly: “Fred! Fred, are you sleeping?”
But the man didn’t move and didn’t react. He was laying and breathing calmly. It seemed he finally fell asleep.
Yibo quickly squeezed through the window in the restroom and as fast as he could ran to the building site.
Be still there, be still there! bumped in his temples.
He ran up the steps, breathing heavily, called in the darkness with insecurity: “Zhan?”
The room instantly lit up with the dim light of a cheap torch. Xiao Zhan stood up from the floor towards him and his eyes were at that moment like…
“Zhan!” they dashed to each other and started kissing. Passionately and wild as if chased behind.
Yibo pressed Zhan onto the wall, licking his mouth, feeling like he was moaning, clinging to him with his hands and rubbing on him. All his fears and doubts were gone. He just caressed his tongue, lips, got down with quick kisses to his neck and behind his ear, to his adam’s apple and his chin – and to the lips again. His Zhan! That was his Zhan again. And Yibo’s hands were living their own life: quickly unbuckled a belt on man’s jeans, almost ripping off a zip, exposing Zhan and himself at the same time. Xiao Zhan forced himself to pull away from him, trying to catch a breath, and whispered with difficulty:
“Yibo, I can’t... I can’t... there, now.”
Yibo got closer to him, almost pressed him into the wall, embracing their dicks with a hand, and started stroking them roughly, without rhythm. But Xiao Zhan moaned hollow anyway, hit Yibo’s shoulder with a forehead, scratching with fingers his sunburnt neck. Yibo hissed but that only stirred him up. He desperately masturbated them both, touching with his lips Zhan’s earlobe and skin on his neck. Yibo felt dizzy because Zhan was gavштп himself up to him instantly, that he was moaning through the greeted teeth, restraining himself as much as he could, that he was waiting for him almost an hour in the dark of this empty house and that now he was hanging on him and was going to come. Nothing was over between them. Fuck that. There he was, his Zhan, that was the real him. Yibo wanted to believe in only that.
“Please, Yibo, please...” he whined, not lifting his head and then pressed lips against his neck.
“What, Zhan?”
“Don’t stop, oh... just don’t stop.”
Yibo wouldn’t stop at that moment, not for anything, even if he was going to lose his hand. To feel the cock of his beloved that was pressed into his own when you both were going to release together... What could be more wonderful?
“I won’t stop, Zhan... mm!”
“Don’t stop holding me,” he whispered and it seemed to Yibo that Zhan wasn’t talking just about this moment. “Don’t stop holding me!”
“I’m here, near you. Do you feel?” Yibo was already covered with sweat but didn’t slow down. “You good?”
“Yes, yes!”
“Were you waiting for me, Zhan? Were you waiting for me?”
“Yibo... I was, Yibo, yes! I’m coming now, oh god...”
He shivered first in his arms, and Yibo instantly followed him right at the moment he felt his hot sperm on hands.
Everything went dark in front of him for the moment. Yibo leaned on Zhan, breathing heavily. They were standing at the wall, trying to recover. Finally, slightly staggering, Yibo pulled away first, wiped his hand on the lowest cement bags that were in a pile near the wall, and fixed his pajama pants. Xiao Zhan pulled up jeans that lifted almost to his ankles. Pulled it together with underwear and fixed the belt.
“Zhan...” Yibo’s voice was a little husky. “Let’s talk?”
“Yeah,” Xiao Zhan went a little away from the wall and leaned on the cement bags, sighed. “When are you telling Yixuan that you’re going away?”
“Zhan, I won’t go away without you,” he said gently but decisively. “I came for you.”
Xiao Zhan gave him a strange glance. Yibo didn’t understand what the man wanted: either to kiss him or smash his face. Maybe, both. Xiao Zhan said just:
“Don’t be silly, Yibo. I won’t go away. But you can, you’re still nobody and nothing here. Go away, Yibo. Go back to Anthony, to your work, to your dreams to become a policeman. You have nothing to do here.”
“And you do, right?” the guy dared him. “What keeps you here?”
“Oh Lord, everything!” Xiao Zhan spread out his hands. “All my life’s been here, Yibo! Here's family, my friends, my choir! Here I mean something and there...”
He broke off and fell silent. Wang Yibo finished instead of him:
“...and there is just me, Zhan, isn’t it? Is it not... enough?”
Xiao Zhan lowered his head. Yibo was looking at him without words and was waiting for his sentence. He was going to tell him something like: Yes, it is, Yibo. Sex was good, of course, but not enough to flip my whole life because of that.
“You don’t understand, Yibo,” he said hollowly and carefully, choosing words again. “There is something here that you have no idea about and that I can’t tell you about. Just believe me: I’m really needed here. Really needed. I can’t just leave everything like that and try to go away with you. Not to mention, it would be much easier for you to do than for me. God... they don’t even allow me to go beyond the perimeter now. I’m like in prison here.”
Yibo was silent, digesting the information, asked carefully: “Tell me, how did they catch you? What happened after we’d separated that morning?”
Xiao Zhan sighed somehow heavily, collected his thoughts: “Now you should know, Yibo, how many rules I broke, having stayed with you...”
Wang Yibo chuckled: “You stayed in the town with me and broke the curfew.”
“Yes, Yibo. I didn’t come back early in the morning but closer to noon and didn’t get to the meeting with John on Saturday morning. He, certainly, noticed that, paid attention, so to speak... In general, they called me to the disciplinary conversation with John.”
“What conversation?” Yibo was startled.
“My father and I. Everyone who’s been raised in the community has their parents as mentors – regarding gender. They shouted at my father, told him he brought up his son badly and something like that, you know. And the next day, after breakfast, a friend from the Familial ran to my mother and said they were going to search us.”
“What?!” Yibo said that too loudly so Zhan even hissed at him.
“I immediately deleted the app and your name from contacts,” Zhan went on. “But I didn’t know that if you delete a contact the history of calls remains... That was so silly... I understood only afterwards that I’d been a fool because that’d been so logical. But I couldn’t think about it at that moment. I was so anxious... I didn’t know if I should have thrown the phone away... I was afraid to throw it away.”
“Why?!”
“Because that was my only way to keep in touch with you! Your present! Because I didn't know they would organize the search. We heard about that but nothing like that ever happened to our family. That was an extreme measure in society. Applied only to those who lost John’s trust.”
“Why did you lose his trust?” Yibo didn’t understand. “You explained everything to them! You had receipts from the repair shop.”
“I didn’t understand it too at that moment but then it turned out that Kelly... remember, that woman I called, John’s secretary? It turned out she was tracking invoices of our cards. They couldn’t track the hotel, because I told them I’d allegedly paid in cash from my own budget. They give us a little in the community, especially to those who go beyond the perimeter. I could’ve saved some money, that lie would have worked out. I showed them receipts from the repair shop however there was no payment on my card. She noticed that and reported to John and he... he is a generally suspicious man.”
“And that money became the reason to organize a search at your place?” Yibo’s jaw fell.
“Yes. And they found the phone,” Zhan said with a broken voice. “They turned over the whole house, literally everything, you can’t even imagine... First they found the charger. Then I showed them the phone myself.”
Yibo felt how his throat dried and he felt a wild terror as if it wasn’t Zhan but he who was caught. And what did he feel? What?
“Of course, I had no reason to buy the phone,” Zhan went on quietly. “And those not erased phone calls in the memory. And that failure with money... I had to tell them that I got an acquaintance beyond the perimeter. Say, you’re such a good guy, you helped me with the car and gave me your phone. I called you Wenhan. I don’t know why. I was afraid they would make me tell them your address or something like that. But they didn’t. They just... were talking to me. And then... you sent me that message.”
Yibo swallowed hard. He even forgot what a message that was and what exactly he wrote there but Zhan clarified that right away, seeing his confused sight:
“Well, that one where you asked me to reply to you or you would call.”
“Zhan...” Yibo’s mouth even dried out of anxiety. Xiao Zhan went on:
“I had to explain it to them and I... I had to tell them that you were too obtrusive. I had to tell them that you... were clinging to me,” and then Xiao Zhan cried. Not like a little girl, just shut his eyes, burying face in hands, and Yibo’s heart stopped. He was standing in front of his beloved and didn’t even know if he could do anything now. And Xiao Zhan said suddenly:
“I’m so sorry, Yibo... that was so cowardly of me... I... just.... just blamed you...”
“Don’t say sorry for that!” Yibo came and pressed Zhan against himself, embracing him tightly with his arms. “You did the right thing. I was safe, Zhan, I understand, I understand...”
“Then they forced me to call you and to tell you those words, I mean... I told them everything and they just told me to do something to make you leave me alone... Of course, they took the phone. I don’t know where it is now... I can’t go beyond the perimeter now, they took away my driving license, threatened they would take my choir away from me, you understand? I couldn’t let them take my choir away. They need me.”
“Enough, Zhan, hush... I see, really, I’ve never blamed you for anything.”
“Yibo...” he looked like a little boy who lived through a big fear. Not even older than Wang Yibo, but much younger. And weaker. Yibo hugged him and shortly kissed his hair and then, very gently – his lips, touching again the crust on his injury in the corner.
Then the guy cupped his face and asked seriously: “This bruise on your face and this sore – is it them, Zhan?”
His eyes were still moist. He was absolutely defenseless and fragile, and answered him with only his lips: “Yes.”
“And your limping, Zhan?” Yibo went on firmly though he wasn’t sure if he wanted to hear the answer. “Why were you limping?”
Man’s lips suddenly quivered but Zhan got away from him, wiped tears from his face and answered in the darkness: “They hit the knee, Yibo. Nothing special.”
“Zhan...” Yibo didn’t believe him. To be exact, he clearly saw that Zhan was lying to him. And Yibo was so scared because of that. He was completely terrified.
“Hit the knee, what's not to understand?!” he flared up with rage, so much that Yibo even stepped back in unpleasant confusion.
But his flash of rage was gone fast, giving a way to a humble guilt:
“Sorry, Yibo... I... don’t want to remember those days. I told you how that was. That’s how I was caught. And now I tell you seriously: go away. All that’s happening here – you don’t need it. That’s none of your business.”
“But whose?”
“The community members’ and mine.”
“And if I become a member of the community, will you tell me what keeps you here?”
Xiao Zhan gave him an attentive glance and shaked head: “Stop talking like that, Yibo. That’s not funny! What should I do to make you go away?”
“What should I do to make you go away with me?”
Xiao Zhan chuckled and shaked his head with fatigue, stood up from the bags:
“I need to go. They start the night round at 12am. They can notice us. Get back to the house of laborers, Yibo, and, please, go away.”
He was about to leave when Yibo caught his hand:
“I have one more week, Zhan. Please, change your mind. One more week. Just open up to me, trust me – and we’ll figure out what to do together, okay? I promise that we will figure something out.”
Xiao Zhan bitterly pursed lips, released his wrist and left first, having turned off his torch.

Yibo safely got to the house of laborers and back to his bed. March would play in six hours but he knew he wouldn’t fall asleep, because the meeting with Xiao Zhan agitated him so much. Of course it was worth thinking over.

Xiao Zhan was coming back to his place. Just several meters, he lived not so far from the building site. But even that was enough to get caught:
“What are you doing here, Xiao Zhan?” he heard behind his back and turned. Victor and two other Brothers were staying in front of him, they were doing the night round. “Why are you breaking the curfew?”
“I just went to breathe fresh air, Victor,” he answered, understanding perfectly that it wasn’t an excuse for the community.
“Maybe you tell John about it?” Victor raised a brow and Xiao Zhan’s heart fell down. “Lads, see Xiao Zhan off to his house.”

Chapter Text

A visit of four men to John’s house didn’t go unnoticed, of course. But all the householders had already been used to not poking into other people’s business so no one except the servants went out to them.
John directed to host them in his study where Xiao Zhan had already been a thousand times before. The leader of the community looked sleepy but, as usual, effortlessly elegant: soft house shoes, silk pajamas, on top – a brown robe in the English style.
First, Victor came in to him and they had a conversation face to face. However, not for long. Xiao Zhan was nervous, standing with the other two men near the staircase but tried not to show it. In the end, damn, he’d been in this house more often then all of them taken together.
Finally, the door to John’s study opened and Victor nodded at them: “Come in.”
All three entered.
Chuckie and Dickie, those were the names of the two men, remained near the door just like hell hounds. Chuckie and Dickie... they were twin brothers. And, despite being the members of Brotherhood, no one ever called them Brothers. They always gave Xiao Zhan creeps. Though, not only they. He was looking at the floor and John was looking at him with a bored look.
“I’m disappointed, Zhan,” he said finally. “Actually... I was disappointed last time and now... I’m just upset because you’re so dumb.”
Xiao Zhan didn’t react. He was just looking at the floor where under their feet was spread a red long-pile carpet. Some of the community members had brought it to John as a present. Oh, Xiao Zhan knew this carpet so well: by touch, by smell and even by taste. It wonderfully dull the sound of steps and shouts when someone’s face was pressed against the floor. John generally had a perfect sound isolation in the study. But you can’t tell it at first sight.
“How long have you already been here, in the community, Zhan?” John continued.
“A little over twenty years, John,” he replied obediently.
“A little over twenty years you’ve been living according to the same rules,” their leader continued, “but you still manage to forget them...”
Zhan bit his lips from the inside and kept silent, lowering his head. He didn’t have the right to speak at such moments. Keep silent unless you’re asked.
“Or you haven’t forgotten?” John continued to oppress. “Then what is it? An intentional disobedience? Mm? Tell me.”
Xiao Zhan finally lifted his eyes on him: his eyes were glowing with defiance close to boldness, he pressed lips and then answered:
“I’ve told Victor what it was. I went out for a walk. That’s all.”
“Walk at midnight although you perfectly knew that the round had already started,” John squinted.
Xiao Zhan lowered his eyes again: “Yes.”
“Probably, what recently happened to you wasn’t enough,” John responded. “Do you want more adventures?”
Xiao Zhan meaningfully moved his chin to the wall but didn’t say anything. A crease appeared between John’s gray brows: “Dickie, Chuckie, hold him.”
Xiao Zhan didn’t even manage to lift his head when twins silently piled on him from two sides and fixed man’s arms, not letting him to wriggle out or to sag.
“No!” Xiao Zhan fearfully moaned. “No, John, don’t do it!”
“Victor, take off his trousers,” John tiredly waved a hand.
Victor also obeyed silently and without controversy, not paying attention to writhing brother Zhan who still moaned: “No, John, let me go, please... John! Tell them to stop! John!”
In a moment Xiao Zhan’s trousers were pulled down to his ankles, he was still twitching, trying to free himself from Chuckie and Dickie. Victor stepped aside, and John, vice versa, came up to the young man and by himself pulled his white cotton underwear pants down, under his scrotum, exposing his genitals. Xiao Zhan pressed lips in one white string, he was all red out of shame and his eyes were moist with tears. Chuckie and Dickie obligingly turned Xiao Zhan’s back to John and the man stroked his buttocks, breathing out, and then stretched out the halves to sides, touching with a thumb the ring of his puckered anus.
Xiao Zhan literally cried: out of anger, wrath, out of shame and also because all of that was happening in front of Chuckie, Dickie and Victor.
“Well okay, okay, enough,” John responded conciliatory, slapped Zhan’s back and pulled up his pants by himself. “I see that the little hole is dry and tight. Is it recovering well?”
“I’m not lying to you!” Zhan cried. “I really just went for a walk!”
He was turned back. John almost fatherly hugged him, pressing him against himself, and roared at twins: “Let him go, you vandals! The boy will have bruises after your big hands!”
The men silently stepped aside. John gently cupped Zhan’s face and said subtly: “Open your mouth, dear.”
Xiao Zhan sobbed and trembled but obediently parted lips and the man all of a sudden smelled it as though checking if he’d drunk or not:
“And it doesn’t smell with anything, my little boy,” he stated with satisfaction.
“I’m not lying to you,” Xiao Zhan squeezed it from himself. Waves of shudder still ran through his body.
“And then what?” John said bitterly. “What the hell were you doing outside after curfew?”
Xiao Zhan lifted his eyes, shiny with moist, and said not loudly: “I’ll tell you in private. Not at them.”
John smiled indulgently. Not even turning to Victor and twins, he said them, wiping Zhan’s cheeks: “Out.”
Men quietly left the study. Their mission was completed. Xiao Zhan convulsively pulled his trousers up, still sobbing. That moment he looked like a snotty teenager, not older. In fact, John liked that very much.
“Well?” he demandingly lifted a brow.
The guy hesitated a little, then said finally, a little bit capricuosly:
“You trapped me here and don’t let me out anywhere! I’m suffocating! I really just went for a walk. I’m just getting crazy here.”
John chuckled and patted Xiao Zhan’s head.
“And that’s all? Silly boy. But you still shouldn’t have gotten caught.”
“You shouldn’t have been like that to me, John! At least, not in front of them!” Xiao Zhan cried out of shame, almost burned. “Why were you like that? You see, I’m not lying to you!”
“But I still had to make sure, baby,” John gently touched his cheek. “Now I’m sure that today you haven’t fucked or sucked anyone. You’re still my boy, albeit disobedient, liking to break rules, huh?”
“I’m suffocating here, John!”
“Well-well, baby, I’ve just given you too much freedom,” a light slap on the cheek. “You’ve gotten used to it too much, too much drunk with it. You, on the contrary, should sit within the community walls and think over your behavior. Tame your love of freedom, baby, it leads to misbehavior.”
Xiao Zhan seemed to calm down, lowered his head and responded quietly: “Yes, John.”
“Go home,” he almost got back to his table. “They still didn’t have to wake me up for such a thing. Could’ve worked on that tomorrow, together with the Sung Joo case.”
“Sorry, John.”
“I won’t punish you, Zhan. But next time you’d better not get caught, otherwise I’ll have to, well, you know...”
“Yes, John. I’m sorry. You’re right. Shall I go?”
The man nodded at him and waved a hand, letting him go.
Having closed the door of his study, Xiao Zhan sighed with relief.

On Monday at breakfast William told laborers:
“The house is ready for decoration but they delay the delivery of materials. So, till they bring it, we are working on errands.”
Yibo livened up and straightened his neck in interest. William, rolling a toothpick from one corner of his mouth to another, took out an old notebook from the pocket and started to read: “Ron, you, as usual – “get this, get that.” Track to Isaac, you will help him to issue the equipment to lads.”
“Alright, William.”
“Morris, you go to the Liplimheim Family, they left a request for the leaky faucet, a clogged water plumbing and a pipe leak in one room, they’ll show you.”
“Why when someone wants a plumber then it’s me?!” he resented.
William glanced at him from under the brows:
“You have three guesses. Maybe that’s because you worked as a plumber beyond the perimeter? Stop asking stupid questions. Don’t drive me mad since morning. Well, next... Luciano, you’re attached to the Cropp Family, they’ve had renovation for two weeks, they need a hand. Well, you got it. Next... Yibo, you’re going to the Tomashevskis, they don’t have much in particular, to nail shelves, to repair handles... The owner could do it himself but his leg is injured. So you’ll come and help them.”
Yibo nodded. He greedily listened to whom and where were other laborers sent but there wasn’t the Xiao Family among the list of errands. They didn’t leave any requests.

But it was still interesting to visit the Family Block. William led them along the real street, they stopped at one house, then another one, and he sent people there according to the list: “This is the house of the Cropp Family, Luciano, go. I’ll pick you up before lunch. And here are the Liplinheims... Morris, Ron will soon bring you tools from the warehouse.”
The house of Tomashevski was of a pale-green color, with a yellow carved door and one of the windows even had a stained glass. Beautiful. Yibo generally noticed that all houses in the Family block were of different colors, bright and with a big amount of decorations, as if compensating that they were in the desert where there were hardly found three or four colors. They guy kept feeling as though he was going along the toy-street, like in a real fairytale kingdom, at least the road wasn’t of yellow bricks.
The Landlord Tomashevski was a middle-aged man, looked tough and strict. He met Yibo right at the terrace of his house. His eyes immediately caught his plastered ankle. Near the man there was a pair of crutches.
He gave Yibo an evaluating look and critically gave a hum, as if doubting the laborer’s strength. Nodded at the house: “My wife is there and will show you everything.”
Yibo nodded and carefully went into the room. The house inside looked like an average ordinary house of middle-class Americans from the suburbs. Well, maybe, just the furniture was quite old. Well, maybe, it lacked some minor repairs and was without luxuries in the interior. Yibo went to the smell from the kitchen. Some bakeries were being made there. The Landlady was a miniature slim brunette with big sad eyes. Yibo suddenly thought like that when their glances met.
“Hello,” he slightly tilted his head. “I am a laborer Wang Yibo. I’m helping you today.”
The woman got excited and fluttered around the house, wiping her hands against her apron. She started showing what and where needed to be repaired and fixed. Those were not a big deal: a wardrobe handle fell off, the tile in the shower detached, a paint on the baseboard peeled off. But Yibo still had an impression that a man’s hand hadn’t done anything here for a long time. What did the Landlord do all those days then?
However, asking questions wasn’t Yibo’s business. He just nodded silently and got to work. Tightened the loose hinges at the wardrobe door, padded the bottom of the drawer, repaired the door handle. One of the rooms where they needed to put strengthening corners on the bed was a child’s room. A boyish one, Yibo understood it right away. While he was working, the owner of the room visited him. Yibo immediately recognized him: thin little arms and hands, a clear sight and messy hair. One of the choristers, the one John called Saved that day when laborers had been allowed to listen to the choir.
“Hi,” Yibo smiled at him but the boy fearfully whisked to his mother, though got back then and looked into his own room, watching the stranger with wide eyes. “I’m putting the corners on your bed so it won’t become loose. Can you help?”
The boy came up to him, stretched his neck to see what a thing Yibo was doing there. Asked hesitantly: “How can I help?”
“Hold right here,” Yibo pointed and the boy timidly put hands at the pointed place. “Press harder, just weigh on it. Aha, like that, I’ll screw now.”
The boy was frail, so thin, but he leaned with all his strength, looking at him with curiosity. Surprisingly noticed: “Teacher Zhan has eyes just like yours.”
Wang Yibo chuckled: “That’s because teacher Zhan is Chinese like me.”
“Have you ever been to China?” the boy curiously asked.
“No. But I really want to. And you?”
“No,” he shaked his head. “I’ve been nowhere except the ranch. Was in Las Cruces once when mom and dad brought me to a doctor.”
His mother just appeared at the door of the room. Mrs. Tomashevski gave the boy a strict look and said: “Mark, go out. You shouldn’t talk to mister.”
The boy instantly hopped and obeyed without saying a word. Yibo suddenly felt pain from his resignation.
“Sorry but you can’t talk to children yet,” the landlady explained. “Laborers are not allowed to do it.”
And Yibo felt he was a second-class person again. Perfect…
“I’m sorry too,” he just said. “I didn’t know.”
Yibo messed on the second floor till lunch, then William picked him up and after the lunch he got back to Tomashevski’s house again. The owner of the house shifted to the dining table in a small living room, Mark was not far from him and read some book. When Yibo got back the boy immediately got up and went to his room. In the living room Yibo had to repair a chair, to change the screen on the window and to strengthen a shelf in the closet. When he was busy with the mosquito net someone knocked on Tomashevski’s door. The landlady opened, there was some old woman at the door. She gave Yibo a quick suspicious glance, then turned it to the Landlady and said quietly:
“Mark was chosen by John last Saturday. John can accept the boy today. Prepare him.”
“We will be ready on time,” said Mrs. Tomashevski and closed the door.
It could only seem to Yibo but the woman was white like chalk when she passed by him.
Then they took the boy to wash.
“Go, put on something clean,” the mother told her son and the boy went upstairs.
Yibo wouldn’t pay any attention to all that if he didn’t hear muffled voices of the Landlady and her husband from the kitchen. They reached Yibo fragmentary because he stuck in the closet at that moment but the guy still heard quite clear: “...what he is doing with him!” the hysterical voice of the landlady.
And then there was a clear sound of a slap and a short female moan. Yibo winced, listening carefully. Did Mr. Tomashevski slap his wife? His roar with low vibrations was heard very audibly: “You’re just a dumb, ignorant, faithless whore. How can you doubt John even in your thoughts?”
They suddenly fell silent, as if listening to Yibo and Yibo collected himself and went on working in the closet demonstratively loudly although listening intently to every sound. He was really scared. He was afraid to believe his own guesses.
He heard the noise of the water. Probably, Mrs. Tomashevsky washed her face. After some time there was a knock on the door again. That was that woman. She didn’t even come in.
“Mark!” the Landlady called, lifting her head. “Sister Ursula came! Get down!”
Light steps on the ladder. The child came past Yibo: beige uniform shorts, a white shirt and even a little tie and his eyes were big and sad just like his mother’s.
“Rejoice,” Ursula told them with rebuke, seeing the woman’s upset face. “You’re blessed through your son. He is your Salvation.”
“Indeed,” said the father. The mother was silent.
The boy went out, the door shut. The woman immediately went upstairs. And, judging by sounds, cried again.

Xiao Zhan was at the door of John’s study again. This time he came here himself. Moreover, voluntarily, but he didn’t want to come in. Xiao Zhan sighed deeply. Every time when he started to hesitate, when cowardice started to get over him, when he realized that no, he didn’t want to come in – every time he asked himself: “Did Mark want that? And Vincent, Lucas or Augustin?” Nobody wanted to. And it was within his power to change something for them. At least, for this evening.
The guy sighed once again. Pull yourself, Xiao Zhan. And then he knocked on the door. Three knocks, really simple. Although it seemed to him that John had already learned to recognize him just by his knock. And now: “Come in, Zhan.”
Xiao Zhan quietly opened the door and even more quietly closed it behind himself. John was sitting in the chair again but this time he was at his MacBook and was typing something. A new book? Xiao Zhan didn’t dare come closer, was peering at John, trying to guess his mood. But he seemed to be in good spirits: no crease between his eyebrows, and corners of his lips were a little but lifted, he was sitting in the chair fully relaxed and was looking at the monitor without any tension.
Then Xiao Zhan collected himself: approached his chair a little but imposingly, first touched the man's forearm, then a shoulder. His fingers dived into the silver hair causing the first sigh of pleasure from him. Xiao Zhan took a place behind the chair, put long fingers on the man's shoulders and started to massage them. John moaned in satisfaction but said: “I know what you’re doing. Don’t try to trick me.”
Xiao Zhan tried to knead John’s shoulders as he liked it. He’d already studied that man like himself. No, even better than himself.
“Mark has a rehearsal tomorrow, John...”
“They all have a rehearsal tomorrow, I perfectly know the schedule of our choir,” he said slightly sharply.
“You’ve already chosen Mark last week. Let the boy rest a little,” Xiao Zhan softly objected.
“Do you want to offer someone in exchange?” John gave a hum.
“You know whom,” Zhan replied quietly.
“I like him,” John smiled. “He reminds me of you when you were a child.”
Xiao Zhan sighed. Go, Xiao Zhan. You’ll do it. One more attempt.
He kneeled down in front of John’s chair, put a chin on the armrest, carefully touched his hand: “John...”
“You do it every time. Do you think I don’t know your real motives?” John’s voice sounded even a little offended, he didn’t look at Xiao Zhan.
“John...” Xiao Zhan let his voice sink to passionate gasp. He carefully took John’s hand and put it against his cheek, closing eyes. Let him think he liked that. Started even humbly:
“I know, John, I’m already too old for you...”
The man chuckled: “No, you’re still my little boy, Zhan. If I admit that you’re too old then I’ll have to admit that I’m an old man.”
“You’re not an old man,” Xiao Zhan objected softly, opening his big dark eyes and looking up at John. He knew he liked it like that, from below. Xiao Zhan turned his head a little and kissed John’s hand.
“You still can’t make me happy,” John was playfully capricious, “you still have not fully recovered there. Do you think I forgot?”
“I can’t make you happy,” Zhan smiled and his left hand suddenly appeared on John’s knee and crawled up his home pants, clasping his aroused cock, “but I can please you. Let me please you, John.”
“Zhan...” he surrendered and smiled, touched his hair. “My pretty boy...”
Xiao Zhan’s hand knew what to do. He mastered this art perfectly. Xiao Zhan took advantage of man’s second of weakness, quickly untying the strings of his pants and pulling the elastic band of the waist down.
“The most wonderful thing in you, baby,” John told him with a smile, “that you were sculpted for me. My ideal boy. You already know everything and can do everything. And you don’t resist my Blessing.”
Xiao Zhan took out his cock that got hard fast in skillful hands. And then someone knocked on the door.
“Who?” John Cole asked, a little bit annoyed.
“Mark’s come,” the voice of Sister Ursula.
Having hesitated for a second, the leader of the community said: “Send him home. Today I’ll be busy with teacher Zhan,” on the last words he put Zhan’s head on his dick.
Taking it deep in his throat, Zhan tried not to think about Wang Yibo. He tried to think only about Mark. That now Mark would come home to his parents and will get one more quiet evening and strong sleep at night. Mark wouldn’t get hurt, Mark wouldn’t be scared, Mark wouldn’t want to die. At least today. And Xiao Zhan will endure.

Wang Yibo was sitting at the terrace of Tomashevski’s house and was waiting for William to pick him up. He’d already done everything from the Landlady’s to do list and even more. He wanted to eat. And moreover to see Xiao Zhan. He hoped Zhan would accidentally come past at least. But he didn’t. Mark came back unexpectedly, accompanied by Sister Ursula.
Yibo blinked in surprise: so fast? Had the boy prepared for so long to go out for just ten minutes?
Mrs. Tomashevski sharply opened the front door, running to her son and embracing him in a hug: “Mark, you are back?! What happened, didn’t John accept you?”
“Teacher Zhan came to him and they sent me home,” the boy answered and Wang Yibo hopped from his place. What? Was Xiao Zhan now at John? This thing unpleasantly worried, Yibo tried to fight off what his intuition was whispering to him, he consciously didn’t want to think that Xiao Zhan and John could be together now, close... But there was nothing strange, wasn't there? Wasn’t there?
“Calm your ungodly joy down, woman,” Sister Ursula growled at Mrs. Tomashevski. “There’s a laborer in front of you, keep your face!”
Landlord Tomashevski appeared from the house and nodded at Sister Ursula: “I’ll educate my wife, thank you, Sister,” and to his family, this time much tougher, “Get inside!”
The mother hastily took her son home and here, to Yibo’s relief, William appeared from around the corner. The guy was happy to finally get back to the house of laborers because the atmosphere at Tomashevski’s house was really crazy.

In the evening Wang Yibo was thinking and thinking about everything he’d seen today on his errands. He didn’t actually like anything: neither inhibited child with sad eyes who lacked the disobedience reflex, nor his mother who cried while her son was sent to John for Blessings, nor the father who laid a hand on his wife and in general “educated” his householders. But most of all he didn’t like that Xiao Zhan conversed with John. And what if something happened to him again? Was it a normal practice or an extraordinary fact? What should he think about it?
But Yibo wasn’t able to properly think about it because, since they got back from lunch, laborers saw that there was another one detached bed placed in their dorm.
“What?” Luciano pulled. “A newbie again?”
“Rather oldie,” Fred said knowingly.
“What does it mean?” Morris asked him.
“The bed is not a bunk one,” Fred noticed. “Brothers might have punished someone. I’ve already seen that.”
But no one expected that a punished one turned out to be not an average Brother but one of the Familial.
Accompanied by William a young guy came into their room, slightly older than Yibo, and he was also an Asian! Yibo had seen him once on Labor day. The guy was carrying his folded mattress and ordinary stuff and was looking around the room and laborers with a sad look.
“Get your new “friend,” William said sarcastically. “He’ll live here till he learns how to behave.”
When William left them and went away, the newbie put the mattress with other things on the floor, raised a hand in a greeting gesture and said wryly:
“Howdy. I am Sung Joo. Kim Sung Joo.”

Chapter Text

Laborers were viewing Kim Sung Joo like an alien who came to earth and somehow appeared in their communal bedroom with his mattress. Fred put hands at sides and said:
“You aren’t just from the Familial, you’re from the Family of Confidant! What have you done so you’re now among laborers?”
But Kim Sung Joo didn’t hurry with answering, he was viewing them with not less curiosity and, glancing at Fred, said: “I know you. You’re an Eternal Fred!”
“What?” his eyes darkened.
“We call you like that behind your back,” the guy laughed. “Eternal Fred. Doomed to be a laborer!”
He giggled and goosebumps ran down Yibo’s back out of Fred’s face expression. It seemed that someone was going to lose his temper and the fight would start. A newcomer Brother Sung Joo, who really lacked a survival instinct, started to point his finger at the rest: “You are Red Morris and you are Pavarotti.”
“Why am I Pavarotti?” Luciano asked silly but the Familial went on.
“I know all of you! You’re Santiago-lizard, and you’re Fat Berthold. You are Ron-Take-This-Bring-That, and you are,” he turned to Yibo, ”a Princess's Toy.”
Suddenly an eerie silence formed around Kim Sung Joo and Morris pulled: “It seems I know why they sent him here.”
“Yeah, someone really talks too much,” Santiago responded. Actually, he really looked like a lizard. Yibo giggled, somehow silly.
“No-o, I was sent here not because of that,” he said boldly, not feeling a danger around himself. “I kissed a girl right in the dance hall.”

In twenty minutes Kim Sung Joo was already sitting surrounded by laborers and was telling them about his adventures just like a real stand up comedian:
“Well in short, we kissed and I was like a cool guy and decided, like, to tell her something smart, okay, to impress her, in a word. I’m standing and understand that my head is empty like okay I had really nothing to say. And you know what, the only thing that pops up in my brain is what I read about kisses is the encyclopedia in our library and I tell her: "You know that from the whole animal world only chimpanzees kiss like people?”
The men started laughing. Sung Joo was really a charismatic guy. Yibo thought that he could tell even the most boring things on the planet in a funny way. Even Fred, who looked like a person ready to kill twenty minutes ago, was sitting now and smiling and Kim Sung Joo went on:
“And here, in short, her mother runs at us, Rose comes, Mrs. Zhou comes and the rest who were on duty at the party, they all are peering at us and she, like, starts crying right at this moment and says: Mom, he called me a monkey!’ oh what just started...”
His voice sinked into another burst of laughter. The time was already past 10pm but the laborers weren’t going to sleep.
Wang Yibo didn’t sleep either and laughed with all of them with all his heart. And he liked Kim Sung Joo but the thought about Xiao Zhan no-no and flashed in his mind.

On Tuesday Wang Yibo visited a Domestic Block for the first time. Sung Joo and him were ordered to clean a barn.
“Jeez what a stench!” moaned the Familial, and Wang Yibo just laughed to himself and was happy that they were given some fabric that they could tie on their faces.
The smell was really thick and worsened under hot weather although in New Mexico at the end of September the temperature fell already to 80°F however that didn’t really change anything. Armed only with a shovel, a pitchfork and a single wheel barrow the men started to clean. What’s more they had to bring the dung to a special storehouse where it was taken for sale.
“So the Community produces something, at the end,” Yibo said gloomily and Sung Joo laughed.
However, it wasn’t boring to work with Sung Joo. Compared with laborers he just couldn’t shut up. The guy somehow reminded him of Wenhan and a little bit of Ron but it was more interesting to listen to him. Maybe, Brother Sung Joo was a naturally gifted comedian, he could brighten up even the most boring story. Yibo could do nothing but laugh, listening to him, and when at lunch laborers asked him what they were talking about he couldn’t remember what they had been talking about with Sung Joo. He couldn’t remember anything special:
“Well.. he told me about his childhood, how he sang in a choir, when he first saw a cow, how he decided to help his mother when he was little and stuffed her biscuits with soil...”
Yibo himself couldn’t tell those as intriguing as Brother Kim. But the guy didn’t really think of his chatter as something special.
He paid most of his attention to new conditions of life he found himself in, and he really complained about everything: they made him work a lot, the bed was cramped, there was a draft from the window, his skin was itchy because of the blanket…
Sung Joo also didn’t like food in the dining: “My mom cooks a hundred times better. Oh, as soon as I get outta here I’ll treat you all to her cookies!”
“Only without soil,” Ron said innocently.
“Without soil, Ronald, whatever you say,” he said respectfully.
Yibo also liked Kim Sung Joo because he didn’t mock Ron as other people did sometimes. Vice versa, he treated the man specifically respectfully, albeit a little bit ironically but he didn’t gloat. Wang Yibo really wanted to make friends with him but that was his last week at the ranch and then he had to either get back to Anthony alone or to finally persuade Xiao Zhan into going with him. And he didn’t know what to do. He really didn’t know.

After dinner Yixuan came to him. They discussed Yibo’s weekdays, his work and everything read for the last two days. The laborer couldn’t help himself and asked his mentor about Sung Joo. Yixuan explained to him: “What he did is not just beyond the rules of our community but beyond any framework of decency...”
“Why?” Wang Yibo was sincerely surprised.
“To kiss a young girl even though you don’t have a relationship and then to offend her by calling her a "monkey"...”
“But he explained he didn’t call her like...”
“Yibo,” Yixuan winced, “the Council has already listened to him and made a conclusion. Whatever he says, Sung Joo kissed her and therefore broke the rule. That one is enough itself. Let’s close the subject.”
“The Council” Wang Yibo raised brows.
“The Council of the Confidants,” Yixuan explained as a self-evident thing. “Some of his members made a decision about accepting you into laborers.”
So that was it. A multilayered and not always clear internal hierarchy of the community never ceased to surprise him.
“Yixuan, and how is it actually done here... mmm... talking to women?” the guy asked carefully. “I’ve understood that Brothers and Sisters can talk to each other, that’s not prohibited but...”
“Of course, it’s not and is even highly encouraged,” Yixuan nodded, “Father has always supported creation of families and having children in the community, to enlarge it. But we want to avoid the vices of the society beyond the perimeter: disgraced and abandoned women, cheating, unwanted pregnancies. That is why Brothers and Sisters can communicate but physical contact – only after the wedding.”
“Even a kiss?” Yibo pointed out.
“Well.. you can kiss after announcing the engagement,” Yixuan smiled. Yibo attentively looked at the guy and thought: was he a virgin? No wonder if he was taking into account the local rules. He specified as if by the way: “Are you engaged to anyone?”
And Yixuan suddenly got shy and averted his eyes: “No. Although... a lot of Sisters would like that, I know.”
Yibo smiled involuntarily: such an innocent male boasting, even cute. But, maybe, that wasn’t about Yixuan’s irresistibility but because he was a son of John and a Crown Prince. And Yixuan, surely, thought about that himself many times. He suddenly sympathized with him. Yibo changed the subject quickly. They were talking about something abstract and during their dialogue the guy, as if by the way, asked about John and how often he personally communicated with his parish, so to speak:
“Father devotes a lot of his time and attention to people in the community,” he said. “We have everyday meetings with him on Saturdays and Sundays and he often invites Brothers and Sisters to confession and Blessing.”
“Confession and Blessing?” Yibo held his breath, waiting for the clarifications. And Yixuan gave them:
“Father helps everyone to walk his Way. Confession helps with that. And Blessings is when father prays with them one by one, it contributes to spiritual purification. That was all in books, Yibo. Haven’t you reached that point?”
“It seems I haven’t...” he pulled thoughtfully, remembering Mark Tomashevski. “Explain to me, Yixuan, I can’t fully understand... Confessions, prays... does the Community manifest any particular faith or religion?”
“Absolutely not,” the guy shaked head. “The Community is a nondenominational society. Here we all have our own god, and our own prays, father doesn’t prevent other people from walking their own Way. You just need to understand that we all move in one direction, the rest is not important.”
“To spiritual purification?” Yibo pointed out because he had already learned that from the books he’d read.
“Exactly.”
“Here, you say that John prays at Blessings together with a person and helps them to purify spiritually,” Yibo hoped his question would sound politely, “but do children need to purify spiritually? Aren’t they... pure just by themselves? But they are also taken to Blessings. What does John do with them?”
He even tried not to look at Yixuan so he wouldn’t see a doubt in his eyes that had tormented Yibo’s soul since Monday. But it seemed that Yixuan didn’t get the implication and just said: “Children is the purest vessel you can only find in the world. Father helps them to get filled with Blessing and they will bring it to their families, to their parents. That is why having a child in a family is a Salvation and a big joy.”
That sounded very schooled and ideologically right. Yibo wondered if Yixuan really believed in what he said. Did he believe in it for real, with all his heart? His mentor had remained a mysterious “dark horse” for Yibo so far.

Xiao Zhan still didn’t come. Didn’t appear either in the dining or anywhere else. Yibo missed him already. He started missing Xiao Zhan right after they parted. And though there was a noisy and fun Sung Joo, the days still dragged on disgustingly slowly.
They were sent to strengthen a dilapidated shed in the Domestic block. There were kept stocks of hay for cows, and in the evening Rose came to them.
It seemed to Yibo he hadn’t seen her for ages. He jumped from his place with all the rest and ran to her, remembering only at the last moment that several days ago he had laughed at laborers who were running around her like little children. And now he was one of them. Why so? Yibo had only one possible answer: despite that Rose was “ideologically right”, despite that she was surely John’s person, an agitator and a manipulator, you still felt some true human warmth that she gave away generously to “her boys”.
“Berthold, you need a haircut. Look, your hair’s grown so much, aren’t you too warm? Morris, I heard they brought a new sunscreen to the medical post. Go take yourself a tube. Yibo, you’ve gotten so tanned, babe, and it’s like your shoulders seem to have broadened. Is that how physical labor changes you so? Ron, I have a present for you...”
She took out a white panama hat from her white tote bag and took on his head by herself:
“There you go, now the sun won’t burn you so much and you won’t feel dizzy, yes, dear?”
Ron literally got blossomed, glanced happily at all laborers: “Am I beautiful?”
Ron was funny. The panama hat made him even more hilarious, somehow miserable, didn’t suit him at all but it was clear that the man needed that for good health. Someone laughed but Rose, gave to that man an intimidating look, smiled at Ron and gently touched his cheeks: “Of course, you are! Such a beauty! When you become a Brother I’ll personally dance with you on one of Sundays, I swear.”
“Rose, is there any news about me?” Fred asked quietly.
“I remember about you, Freddie,” she almost waved him off. “Wait. Your time will come. Today I’ve come to Sung Joo, boys.”
All of them looked at Brother Kim: he was standing, crossing arms on his chest, and grinned.
“Let’s go talk, dear?” she asked even slightly tiresomely.
“Do I really have a choice?” he answered.

Xiao Zhan came on Thursday, right at breakfast time. Yibo even exhaled with relief, having seen him. It seemed that someone finally came up with a plan how Yibo and him could meet. Zhan came up to William with a swaggering walk, the man was standing right at the laborer’s table, giving tasks for the day. Yibo tried not to look at him and pretended that he was enthusiastically picking at his bowl of porridge with a spoon.
“Good morning, Brother William,” Xiao Zhan smiled cordially, approaching him.
“Brother Zhan...” William remained as strict as usual, only the tone of his voice became softer. “What brought you here?”
“I have a request,” Xiao Zhan gave a hum. “An emergency request. Can I get two people to help me today?”
Yibo’s hands almost trembled out of nervousness. Don’t look at him, don’t look. He’ll choose you, that’s why he’s come here. Just don’t show it.
“Emergency request?” William looked at him skeptically. “What do you need people for?”
“I’ve decided to renovate my room,” Xiao Zhan told him. “I need to take all my furniture out, I won’t be able to do it alone. Give me two lads for help. With John,” here Xiao Zhan made an intonational pressure with his voice tone, “I’ve already agreed on everything.”
William peered at Xiao Zhan, that man was standing with a friendly poker face and was smiling cutely. His whole look said that William didn’t have the right to argue with him or to brabble. William was just a Brother, not even a Familial and Xiao Zhan was a Familial, a Confidant, a John’s Nightingale. The only right answer from William was “yes, sir.” Yibo tried to hide a grin with all his might and ate enthusiastically.
“Sure,” William gave him a forced smile but everyone felt that this man almost hated Zhan. “Who do you want?”
Xiao Zhan glanced at the table of laborers. Some of them stretched necks trying to attract Xiao Zhan’s attention. The work he claimed was easy and everyone wanted to go to his house. Yibo worked very hard to not look at Zhan and to not make an indifferent face.
“Oh, Ron!” Xiao Zhan exclaimed and Ron, sitting next to Yibo, almost hopped out of unexpectancy. “You’re Ron, aren’t you? You’ve been to my home, brought me tools for the grand piano!”
Ron smiled, turned his head from left to right in his panama hat: “Yes, that was me! Brother Zhan remembers my name, did you hear?”
“Of course, I do, you’re such a nice guy,” Zhan’s voice was tender. “Would you help me today?”
“Ron...” William wanted to object but cut himself. Yibo didn’t restrain anymore and looked at them directly, noticing how Zhan turned a cold glare to William. Damn, it turned out, Xiao Zhan could be intimidating! So, that’s really... But William didn’t give up and still objected but very politely, “Ron has a lot of deliveries today...”
“Well, no problem,” Zhan just said, he was a pure charm again. “Someone else can perform his tasks today. Let Ron have a little rest. Ron, who would you take with yourself?”
Yibo’s heart sank. That was risky. Despite that Ron and him were friends he could choose anyone. William gasped with indignation but suppressed that within himself. He obviously wanted to tell Zhan that Ron didn’t usually strain, especially compared with other laborers, and to carry furniture was more difficult than to be a delivery man inside the small community but he wasn’t going to object to him this time. Everyone waited for Ron’s answer. The man viewed the laborers with a happy face. It had been the first time Ron was a center of attention, and had been the first time he felt his own worth. Yibo didn’t restrain and looked directly at Ron, secretly touching his knee with his own under the table.
“Ronald, choose me!” Sung Joo asked boldly. Laborers gave him an unpleasant look sideways but Ron still turned to Yibo: “Yibo, would you come with me?”
Yibo really tried to hide his glee and to look indifferent: “Yes, Ron, I don’t mind.”
“I’m taking Yibo with me!” he said proudly to the whole dining. All of that reminded Yibo of an old cartoon: Pikachu, I choose you!, and he couldn’t restrain a smile. “Yibo is my best friend!”
“That’s nice!” Xiao Zhan smiled. “Finish eating, I’m ready to take you right now.”

To follow Xiao Zhan like that openly through the ranch was even strange. Ron minced near, beamed all over and whispered to Yibo, still quite loudly:
“I remember that you wanted to get acquainted with Brother Zhan, Yibo! I chose you intentionally. You see, I’m your best friend, I make your wishes come true!”
“Ron, you really are a wonderful friend,” Yibo smiled at him.
“The best?”
“The best.”
The man sighed with pleasure, Xiao Zhan smiled medium. Finally they came to the house of Zhan: pale-peach color, beautiful curved front door, some ornamental plants in big pots near the entrance. It smelled pleasantly inside: air fragrance? Yibo chuckled. Xiao Zhan asked them not to take off shoes, led men to the second floor, glanced briefly at Yibo:
“Here, this is my room.”
It was spacious and very cozy: expensive blue wallpaper, gentle tulle of curtains, that casted a pattern on the floor, silk cover on wide bed in tone. Stile – unisex, but there were some soft perceptible empathic vibes of the owner anyway.
Gay, Yibo thought and chuckled again.
“I want to change the wallpaper,” Zhan told them. “We need to take out all the furniture and remove old wallpapers. Will you do it in a day?”
That was really easy. Zhan told them where to put furniture, removed all small stuff by himself so it wouldn’t get in the way, and rolled his bedding. Then Yibo and Ron started to carry and move. Zhan said to them: “Don’t go to the diner for lunch. I’ll feed you here.”
Laborers exchanged glances in surprise: “Can we do that?” Ron asked confusedly.
“You can if I invite you,” Zhan winked at him and went downstairs to cook.
In waiting for a tasty home-made lunch work went with more fun. They took all the furniture out of the room, took off the curtains, went on to remove wallpapers. Smell of the upcoming food filled the house very soon, something fried and meat-based, two workers’ mouths watered. Zhan appeared again at the door:
“Yibo, can you help me lay the table? Ron, will you handle it here alone now?”
“Of course!” he said obsequiously. He liked removing wallpapers.
Wang Yibo silently followed Zhan downstairs, and then he grabbed the guy by the arm and dragged him into a dark closet so no one could see them and hear them even accidentally. Another moment and here Zhan already pressed him against the shelves and kissed him passionately, forced his tongue into and leaned into him. Yibo aroused momentarily, especially because the man took the initiative. Before he fully realized it he was already kissing Xiao Zhan back, licked his lips, bit and his hands uncontrollably kneaded the man's buttocks. When Yibo understood that, he got embarrassed because of himself: god, he was just like some animal... The guy carefully put hands on Zhan’s waist but kept on pressing him against himself. To feel Xiao Zhan’s semi-aroused cock, rubbing against his own, was pleasant.
Xiao Zhan put arms around his neck, inhaled him, burying nose onto Yibo’s hair, smiled: “Now you’re smelling like we do.”
“There’s one shampoo for the whole community,” he chuckled.
“Have you already talked to Yixuan?” Xiao Zhan asked him and instantly leaned to him with kisses by himself. Was asking him in between kisses, “Have you? When are you going away?”
Wang Yibo suddenly felt awfully good, when some simple and clear realization fell on him: in fact, Xiao Zhan didn’t want him to go. He drove him away but kept him by himself as well. Pushed him away and then he first pressed him against himself. Out of this realization Wang Yibo laughed a little:
“No, I haven’t talked to him. And I won’t, Zhan. Please, tell me: you don’t want to let me go, do you?”
In the penumbra of the storage room, lit with only a thin ray of light from the not fully closed door, Wang Yibo was still able to see Zhan’s glowing eyes that were looking at him. Felt how fast the heart was beating under his shirt, felt his breathing on himself. Zhan fell silent and then said:
“I do. I don’t want to. But you still have to go, Yibo. Because I can’t see how we can be together.”
“Only if you go with me,” Yibo nodded at him.
“That’s true,” the guy responded. “But I can’t go away. I want it, I won’t lie, I have wanted that all my life, but I can’t.”
Thoughts of all the latest days, all his guesses, suggestions, secret fears – all those were spinning on the tip of Yibo’s tongue but how could he start such a serious talk here and now, in this dark closet when anyone could enter the house at any moment? Yibo swallowed and asked instead: “Where are your parents?”
“On a visit to another Family,” he answered. “But they must come back after lunch.”
“I want to talk to you. I need to ask you something. When will we be able to meet?”
“Not earlier than Saturday evening,” Xiao Zhan responded. “I’ll try to slip out of the house on Saturday.”
“We’ll meet at the same place? At the building site?”
“No. It’s better not to meet there so far. Have you already been to the Domestic block?”
“Yes.” I’ve cleaned the barn and fixed the shed there.”
“Good. Here, let’s meet in the hay shed. On Saturday, at half past ten.”
Xiao Zhan gave him another kiss and then the doorbell rang. That was William. He came to pick laborers up for lunch. Yibo didn’t show up in front of him, he was laying the table, but he heard how Xiao Zhan told him he would leave lads at himself for lunch. He wished he’d seen William’s face at that moment!
“You like to drive him crazy, don’t you?” Yibo chuckled when Xiao Zhan closed the door.
“It is sometimes useful to knock down arrogance from everyone,” Xiao Zhan laughed without mirth but then smiled, driving away some sad thoughts of himself. “Ron! Get down!” The lunch is ready!”
Xiao Zhan made them a breaded chicken, not worse than the one they’d had in KFC on their first date in El Paso. It seemed that was hundred years ago. Ron admired everything he tried and those dishes were truly worth that. Xiao Zhan had a culinary talent and Wang Yibo always smiled warmly giving the man short glances, looking at him with admiration. Atmosphere among them three was warm, it even seemed as if they were a family: here was his husband, Xiao Zhan, a beautiful man who also cooked like a god. And here was Ron, their little son.
After lunch they really had nothing else to do. If there was no Ron they would definitely find themselves some job but they couldn’t escape from him.
“Get a little rest, do you want some tea?” Xiao Zhan offered them.
His tea was somewhat strange, herbal. Laborers drank it carefully in small sips, and Zhan sat at the grand piano that was standing in the living room on the first floor and ran across the keys fast with his fingers.
He was wonderful. Really, the most beautiful man of all Yibo had ever met in his life. Looking at him and listening to him playing the grand piano, Yibo fell in love with him again, another time. He looked at his arms, long thin fingers, sharp shoulder blades that were visible under the shirt and understood that he was where he had to be. Near this man. Of course, as much as he could but he was near. That was right. They would leave this place only together because if he did it alone, hadn’t even tried to change something for Xiao Zhan so he wouldn’t forgive himself till the rest of his life.
“Brother Zhan is really beautiful, isn’t he?” Ron said in a loud whisper.
Yibo just smiled in response. And then he understood that he knew what Xiao Zhan was playing: that was a grand piano version of “Bohemian Rhapsody”. Probably Zhan picked it up by ear.
I remember that day too, Zhan, Yibo answered him in his thoughts. I also felt good that day.
But their idyll was cut by the opening door. Those were Xiao Zhan’s parents that came back.

Yibo understood instantly that Zhan looked more like his father, he didn’t really take much after his mother. His parents were average Chinese, people that were somehow quiet and not remarkable. It's a wonder how they got such an incredible son but Yibo was definitely surprised not because of it but because Xiao Zhan himself in some way closed in front of his parents. That wasn’t a tense of fear like Mark Tomeshevski was with his father but Yibo felt as if Zhan took on a mask. There was no more laid back kind atmosphere. Although nothing had changed visibly, at the same time everything had changed.
Laborers were told to go upstairs to Xiao Zhan’s bedroom that was empty now, with torn wallpapers. There they sat for several hours before William was back.
Zhan checked in on them a couple of times, if everything was okay, once he brought them water but didn’t sit with them and didn’t give them any new tasks. Just played the grand piano downstairs.
Then William picked them up. The rest of the day Wang Yibo was down in the dumps. Because he hadn’t stayed longer with Zhan, because he wanted back to him, because he became tense like that in front of his own parents and behaved as if they were strangers to him. That even worsened and underlined doubts and suspicions of Yibo. And he understood that he couldn’t leave the community, at least before he was able to talk to the man openly and before he told him everything that was in his soul.
But there was one problem: his vacation month would be over in three days, Pablo and Sam were waiting for his comeback at work but he understood that he wasn’t even half-ready to leave the ranch.
Yixuan came to Yibo on Friday after work. His mentor decided to go to the warehouse with Yibo where he was given a phone to call his mother. This time he asked for three calls. Yixuan looked at him with surprise and confusion, and Yibo confessed, said almost the truth:
“I got a month of vacation to get here. I didn’t know if I would be accepted here so I decided not to cut out all my links in that world. Now I have to tell them I won’t be back. So they won’t start looking for me with the police.”
Yixuan nodded with respect and gave Yibo the phone. Stayed near but didn’t keep a stopwatch for him as William had done. First, Yibo called Wenhan. He had three missed calls from his friend and about twenty messages: “Hey, bro, finally! What’s wrong with your phone?” he started hastily. “When’re you back?”
It turned out to be more difficult than he’d expected. He cleared the throat and replied: “I won’t come back, bro.”
Wenhan fell silent in surprise, and Yibo used that pause: “I found a good job in Chicago. I’ll stay here. Pack my things, I’ll take them whenever I have time. You can let other people rent the room.”
“Yibo... Hold on, won’t you really even come back to take your stuff?”
“I have here everything I need,” the guy looked at Yixuan sideways and then turned away, “I’m sorry for framing you like that. Find a new flatmate.”
“Yibo...”
“Sorry, I can’t talk for long, I’m... at the airport. My flight is soon but I still have to call my mom. Come on, good luck out there. Less series, more sport, do you remember, Wenhan?”
“Aha... wait, bro...”
“Bye, Wenhan.”
He hung up. He just breathed and looked in front of himself for some time. He felt Yixuan’s voice as if from afar.
“Is it difficult? To cut out all links with that world?”
“Not easy,” Yibo responded and dialed Pablo. He didn’t answer. Mrs. Cruz too. Maybe, they were somewhere together now. Maybe, were eating her heavenly tacos. Well, it was even better for him. Then he called Sam.
“Yeah,” his hoarse and intermittent voice was like a dog’s bark. Yibo smiled for some reason.
“Hi, Sam. Are you at work now?”
“Yes.”
“Sam, I won’t come back from Chicago.”
Those words were hard for Yibo, especially because Sam was the only person in the world who knew where Yibo was in reality. And the most beautiful thing about this person was that he could keep secrets and wasn’t going to persuade Yibo that he was making a mistake. The man was silent for some time and then just one word: “Voluntarily?”
“Yes,” Yibo answered.
One more second of silence and: “Do you still have my dog tag?”
“Yes, it’s still with me,” Yibo involuntarily touched a chain on his neck, “Sorry, Sam, you’ll have to find a replacement for me. I have a new life here in Chicago.”
A pause again. But Yibo was listening to it with a sinking heart.
“Are you happy?” Sam asked. Yibo didn’t expect such a question. Such a deep question.
“I am,” he answered but his voice became husky for some reason. “I have a goal and I’m going towards it.”
“Good luck at achieving,” the man responded.
“Thank you, friend.”
After the conversation with Old Sam he wanted to cry. Yibo sat and breathed feeling some absolute loneliness. There was a feeling inside, as if he burned all bridges though he understood that was nonsense and that wasn’t true. The most difficult thing was still awaiting him. Mother. He couldn’t just get out of her with two or three words, fortunately, Yixuan also understood it. He didn’t limit him in time, even tried to support him, slapped his shoulder.
“Mom, I won’t get back to Anthony yet,” he told her and realized the storm was coming. He had twenty missed calls from her and ten messages. “I found a job, I’ll stay here, Wenhan will send me my things by post.”
He listened to her full fire-burst of fury, resentment, worry, misunderstanding.
“You can be everywhere,” she said at the end, “but you still could answer calls more often and call back to your mother?! That’s not like you! That’s now how I brought up my son!”
He mumbled something about a broken phone, about a new job and about too much work.
“So buy yourself a new phone, god damn!” she was angry and didn’t mince words. “I’m not going to sit and wait until my son will deign to talk to his mother!”
“You’ll have to, mom. I’m leaving,” he lied shamelessly. “Expedition... with nature activists... That’s a collaboration of our company with “Greenpeace”. I’m going to Antarctica, mom, to save penguins from the oil spill. There will be no signal, do you understand? I’ll be able to call only once a week, not more. I love you, mom, but really, I won’t be able to call more often...”
“What Antartica?! What penguins, what the hell are you saying?!” she gasped and a little boy within an adult Yibo stiffened.
“That’s the work of my dream, mom, I’m doing something important, do you understand?”
“You can do something important and don’t still leave your parents!” she couldn’t stop.
In general, conversation with his mother took twenty five minutes. All that time Yixuan was sitting nearby and waiting patiently. When Yibo hung up he felt really exhausted, so he gave his phone to the mentor even with some relief.
Yixuan dropped off the phone for Isaac for storage and Yibo sat for some time, burying face in his hands.
“Good job, Yibo,” Yixuan told him. “I’m proud of you. Now I really see that you’re ready to stay with us. That you’ve found something important here. More important than your life beyond the perimeter.”
Those words strangely encouraged Yibo. He had to remember why he was there. He had to remember that it won’t last forever. He was here because of Xiao Zhan. He had to take him out of this place. And Xiao Zhan was now really more important for him than his whole life beyond the perimeter. On the one hand, he felt a little more relieved, on the other hand – so much bitter. But there was a Saturday ahead, Xiao Zhan and him would see each other and then Yibo would finally define everything for himself.

Chapter Text

They finally brought materials for home decorating. The community seemed to significantly refill the warehouse: several kinds of wallpapers, buckets of putty, door handlers, latches, similar spherical lamps, paints of all variations, several double glazings, tiles, rolls of insulation and so on.
Looking at two loaded trucks Yibo understood that Xiao Zhan had done just a little shopping at his store.
Laborers were made to work at the warehouse and they unloaded all of those from the trucks, according to Isaac’s order, carried that out around the warehouse and private orders – to houses.
Isaac said where they needed to bring something and Yibo didn’t volunteer. He was waiting until Xiao’s house was announced since Zhan had ordered new wallpapers for his room, but exactly at the moment when the storekeeper shouted: “Xiao’s house, ten rolls of wallpaper!”
Ron was the first to raise a hand: “Me! Me! Brother Zhan and I are friends, he’s already chosen me!”
“You’ll have to stay there and hang them. Who’ll you take with you?” Isaac asked.
Yibo was sure of Ron's answer. But then the man turned to him and, as if he was apologizing, said:
“Yibo, wouldn’t you mind if I take Sung Joo this time? I took you last time but Brother Sung Joo begged me so much this time!”
Yibo pursed lips in disappointment: Brother Sung Joo just wanted to get off with easy work! If he only knew... But he wasn’t going to put pressure on Ron, moreover, Xiao Zhan and he'd already agreed on meeting today after the bedtime hour.
“It’s okay, Ron,” he said with restraint and even tried to smile. “Take Brother Sung Joo if he begs so much. I won’t get offended.”
The day went on very dull. There was no barbeque, as at the building site, this time. After work laborers were left to their own devices. Yibo listlessly flipped through John’s books thinking more and more about the forthcoming talk with Zhan. What would be? What to prepare for? Intuition prompted Yibo: the conversation would be difficult, but he was ready for it. At least, he could finally clear out the truth and persuade Zhan to leave with him.
Slowly but surely the evening was coming . Eventually everyone fell asleep. Yibo was waiting till the proper time and then, as usual, got out through the window in the restroom and ran to the Domestic block. It was situated farther than the building site, it took more time to reach, but Yibo came first anyway. The storage shed was dark and quiet. Yibo got to the closest briquette almost by feel, sat and started to wait. Hay smelled pleasant. He always liked unusual smells: smell of mowed, already dry, slightly savory grass, smell of barns that contained smells of earth and old wooden boards within, smell of basements and cellars, so he had used to search through some abandoned houses when he’d been a child. Solitude almost lulled him. Yibo was afraid to fall asleep but still roused himself when he caught the sound of footsteps approaching the barn.
“Yibo?” there was Xiao Zhan’s whisper, out of breath.
“I am here,” he said, seeing only the man’s silhouette at the door.
He heard some little clicks: Xiao Zhan was obviously trying to turn on the old flashlight.
“We need no light,” Yibo whispered to him and took a man to himself, found his lips and kissed – gently, long, caressing. Xiao Zhan instantly succumbed, forgetting about the flashlight, he clung to him with all his body, answering the kiss. Yibo fell on the hay briquettes, dragging Zhan to himself. The man laughed shortly, not pulling away from his lips, moaning quietly into him, Yibo felt as it got harder in Zhan’s pants. Damn... Despite that Yibo didn’t really have experience in oral petting, he wanted to undress Zhan so badly and to suck him with all his passion. Yes, maybe he wasn’t able to give him a royal-like blow job, like Zhan himself was, but he was sure he could have the mark A just for his effort.
However, he shouldn’t hurry. Anyway, he wanted to talk first. So he pulled away from Zhan with a superhuman effort, exhaled: “Let’s... talk. We have to talk, Zhan.”
The man didn’t argue. He just fell silent for some time, probably trying to collect himself. He clicked with the flashlight again. The third time he finally managed to turn it on. Both squinted out of the light, smiled at each other: “Hi.”
“Hi.”
“Why didn’t you come today with Ron?” Xiao Zhan asked.
“Sung Joo convinced Ron to take him. I... didn’t insist to not attract attention.
“That’s right,” Xiao Zhan agreed. “They’ll come again tomorrow, will bring the furniture back, I asked them... Well. What do you want to talk about?”
Pum-pum-pum.... that wasn’t as easy as it had seemed to Yibo. By the way, he didn’t really think it was going to be easy. He got shy, bit his lips, sorted through some appropriate words in his head, said in advance:
“For the beginning just let me tell you everything, ok? To speak out. I’ll tell you what I think, what I feel and everything I noticed and then you’ll have a chance to comment on it. Don’t interrupt me, okay?”
“As you wish,” Zhan was dead serious.
“And, please, you should remember the main thing, that I don’t want to offend you or something, do you get it? Just... I have another view on all the things, you know, because I’m from beyond the perimeter. You can pay no attention to something but I do.”
“I see, Yibo, yes. Speak.”
The guy collected his thoughts and started to tell Zhan about the past Monday. About Tomashevski's family, about the boy’s mother’s reaction, about everything he’d been able to notice and feel. He was talking as it was, about what he experienced, and didn't try to exaggerate or politely cover something up. At the end he asked his main question:
“And you always told me that your choir needs you and that you can’t leave them. I kept asking myself why do you hold so tight on them? What was so special about those children, because there, beyond the perimeter, you would still be able to work with kids, to work with music, I just couldn’t understand what keeps you here. But after that family, after all I’ve seen... I don’t know, Zhan, no offense but... I got the feeling that John does something... unpleasant to them, at his Blessings... Do... do you know what he does? Maybe you know?” he finished hesitantly and looked timidly at the man.
Xiao Zhan was silent. His black eyes in the dim light of a dying flashlight seemed two big clefts into the abyss. The quiet of night embraced the barn, they were sitting in front of each other. Man’s lips were pursed tightly, and he himself seemed petrified.
“You know,” Yibo said more confidently and felt how goosebumps went across his spine, “you can’t not know.”
Xiao Zhan sighed deeply and lowered his lashes as if collecting himself. Wang Yibo felt some kind of panic was approaching him. All his most scary thoughts, guesses were coming true. He already regretted asking this question, regretted even starting this conversation. He wanted to erase this evening from his memory, to escape to the house of laborers, to cover himself with a blanket and not accept all this nightmare that was exposing for him.
“Zhan...” he chuckled nervously, “isn’t it what I think it is?”
But Xiao Zhan didn’t laugh back, didn’t share his “humor” and just opened his eyes again and looked directly at him, and Yibo felt as his soul was getting cold:
“Well... you would still figure it out, sooner or later. It’s good you’ve done it by yourself. I wouldn’t have found the courage to tell you.”
Yibo became numb. Definitely throughout twenty years of his life he had never encountered something so scary and oppressive. And this man in front of him didn’t just encounter it, he... he…
“Does he molest them?” his own whisper seemed to Yibo just a rustling wind of echo.
Xiao Zhan was just looking at him. Was looking and keeping silent. He didn’t have to say anything actually.
“Does he rape them?”
“He calls it to fill with blessing, “ Xiao Zhan answered and his voice gave off some grave cold. A dead voice.
Wang Yibo couldn’t stand it, jumped up and started to go around the barn back and forth. He shaked, his nerves got hit with electricity. He remembered the first time he had seen John. When he touched Mark in front of everyone and what unpleasant feelings that evoked in him. And Mark’s mother, crying upstairs, and his father, angry... He stopped in the middle of the barn, looked at Zhan: “Just Mark? Or...”
Zhan’s answer was like a stone dropped into the water: “Everyone.”
“Zhan!” Yibo couldn’t stand and cried, not understading himself what outraged him so much. What he found out or the fact how reserved and under full control Xiao Zhan talked about it.
And then he understood.
Oh no, no, no, no, no... Fuck, fuck! He didn’t want to know, didn’t want to ask. He just wanted to get back his documents from here and run beyond the perimeter, into the night, into the desert, it didn't matter just get out of the truth. But his tongue seemed to live his own life and his lips treacherously moved, saying:
“Zhan, you’ve been raised in the community. You sang in the choir... Did you too...?”
Zhan tilted his head, covered eyelids again, sighed deeply even with relief: “Yes,” came out, husky, but for Yibo that was like a shot in the quiet of the night, “me too.”
Maybe for Zhan it was better to say especially me. It seemed to Yibo that the whole barn was going to blur in front of his eyes. He felt sick. Shock echoed in his legs, making the guy stagger and sit at the hay briquette again, lowering his face into his hands.
The old flashlight couldn’t stand anymore, blinked three times and turned off, this time forever, sinking the men into haze. Yibo couldn’t say anything yet, he needed to get back to his senses. Xiao Zhan didn’t move too, they were silent for some time and then in the absolute darkness there was a voice of Xiao Zhan: “Am I disgusting?”
What? Wang Yibo twitched, getting back to reality: What?
“Am I disgusting to you?”
He turned to Zhan though he couldn’t see him, just felt the heat of his body. The man’s voice was as if he was staying in front of the noose and was about to put his head there:
“I’ll understand if you start to disdain me from now on.”
“Stop it now!” Wang Yibo got scared from his own voice, dispersing his own fear with anger. “Shut up! Don’t talk like that about yourself!”
He felt Xiao Zhan’s hand in the darkness and squeezed his fingers into his palm: so cold! It was somehow crucial to warm him up.
“Xiao Zhan, that’s a horror, a horror!” he felt with relief that Xiao Zhan moved: squeezed his hand back. He tried to talk carefully though it was difficult to restrain his worries, “Tell me everything. You have to speak out.”
He didn’t want to hear about it. His soul moaned: go away, leave me alone, don’t impose this burden on me! I don’t want to know, I want to stay in sweet ignorance. But he understood that Xiao Zhan needed to speak out. How long had he piled that up? How long had he been silent, suppressed, was embarrassed, hid it, endured, choked... If even Yibo let him stay silent, then would anything remain alive within him? Or would it be absorbed by the grave cold, oozing out of his eyes at the moment he remembered all that? No, he couldn’t let him stay silent, he had to speak! As if with a person getting faint, who was being taken away by the sweet nothingness of death: talk to me, Xiao Zhan, don’t close your eyes, talk to me!
“Talk, Xiao Zhan, tell me everything, from the very beginning, tell me...”
He was whispering it like a mantra, repeated that, stroking his cold fingers, and Xiao Zhan parted his lips. He heard that because of the sound of his inhale, the man’s tone was dull first, full of some far, forgotten emotions:
“Firstly John seemed to me the best of all people. He put me on his shoulders, circled me in his arms and always gave candies. When he appeared in our life mom and dad stopped arguing, started talking less about divorce, they always smiled when they saw him. And I smiled too. He always sat me on his lap when he saw me, fed me by hand... But what is normal when you’re six gets somehow awkward when you’re eight and absolutely embarrassing when you’re ten but he kept doing that. Now I think he accustomed me to himself. I don’t know... You see, everyone loved him. Everyone who was around me, who I grew up with, my parents – all of them adored him. It seemed John couldn’t do anything wrong or bad, do you understand? And if you don’t like what he does then the problem is within you yourself. I was raised in such a mentality. I was about 8 when I first experienced embarrassment and shame when he sat me on his lap. But there were always parents around and they were as if that was nothing special. But I felt even more embarrassed when he fed me by his hand. He broke off pieces and put them into my mouth and I blushed all over and didn’t know where to look. I didn’t even understand what embarrassed me so much. Now I see... he touched my tongue, stroked my lips with his fingers, put them inside when he was doing it. I was disgusted but I didn’t know how to escape it because he was kind to me, gave attention, and cared. I thought I was just ungrateful. It lasted for several years. John didn’t hurry. Furtively, when I was sitting on his lap, he touched my legs as if occasionally, you see... shaked off some invisible crumbs. I just didn’t say anything. I couldn’t understand if that was right or not what he was doing. When I turned ten he started taking me to blessings..” Xiao Zhan fell silent, taking breath, Wang Yibo moved closer to him in the dark, being afraid to interrupt his flow of confession. His heart gave a throb. He knew what he was going to hear but to hold Zhan’s hand now was more important than his own emotions.
“...he locked me in his study, forced me to fold my hands prayerfully as Christians do, but he himself was touching me everywhere and saying that he was giving me God's blessings through his touches. I was wondering why he needed to touch me everywhere, I didn’t already like at all what he did, I accepted those blessings as a torture... But my mom and dad used to be so happy when I came back home after them. They used to say that I brought them John’s light and grace, that I was their joy. And I endured. I thought that had to be like that. I just needed to endure so everyone would be happy. When I turned eleven, his touches...” Wang Yibo heard his heavy breathing, the words were heavy for Xiao Zhan, “...generally, once I got aroused. It just so happened, I didn’t even understand. John, of course, noticed that, and got really happy... And then he told me that what I experienced was because I was a spoiled boy. That there was a sin within me, a vice. I instantly became not light and joy but a vicious sinner. And he was the only one who could help me to become clean again... And I... I was so embarrassed, you know, because no one doubted John’s words, if he said that then it was true... And I let him... I let...” he didn’t finish and cried. Quiet, almost inaudibly. Wang Yibo understood that just by his trembling hand.
There was some stupor within Wang Yibo, emptiness. Imagination drew him brightly how John helped a young Xiao Zhan “to become clean”. He said without emotions, as if he was an echo of himself: “Did he do it with hands? Did you come for the first time then?”
“I did,” he replied through sobbing, wiping his face with another hand. Wang Yibo held him tightly, being afraid to let go, said firmly: “How old were you when he raped you first time?”
“Twelve.”
That was some new kind of pain for Yibo – pain for someone else. Sure, he stood up for his friends when he was a child. Once some woman at the supermarket offended his mother in front of him, and his grandfather was ill for a long time and died when he was five. But that was not like that. He had encountered such pain for his beloved for the first time, such a burning unfairness, an abyss of weakness... all of that had already happened, he couldn’t change anything. All of that had already been. Wang Yibo had understood for the first time what hatred was like. It turned out that for twenty years of his life he had never really hated anyone. This feeling flooded all his insides, filled all his cavities. His hatred was clear and even gave him some relief, as if a sip of cold water on a hot day. He involuntarily squeezed Xiao Zhan’s fingers tighter, but the man didn’t react. Not paying attention, he went on:
“He did it regularly: once or maybe twice a week. I felt, of course, sick. Really sick. I... remember him instilling me that I felt sick because I was sinful. That my body resisted blessing. Told me nonsense but I fell for it because I was really lost. What depressed me most was that I always came at the end. He called that to purify sin, that was why I always felt good at the end. He counted that as his merit. I felt like a sinner, I felt that I was an accomplice in something shameful, I suspected that he lied to me but couldn’t understand where exactly.”
“Did you try to talk to your parents?” Wang Yibo asked quietly.
“I did,” his voice in the dark sounded bitterly, “with my father. It seemed logical. He was a man, like John. He should have known if that was normal or not what he was doing with me.”
Xiao Zhan sighed several times and went on:
“I didn’t know how to talk about such things, I didn’t even know the word pedofile at that time. I started mumbling something to my father, that John was touching me everywhere, that I felt shame, disgust and then I felt good and then painful... I don’t know, I was in such a mess then. I don’t know so far if he understood me... I guess he did. It seems to me now that he perfectly understood but it just didn’t fold into his view of the world. So he decided to pretend he didn’t understand anything. Here there are a lot of people who turn a blind eye to John’s crimes though most of them know or, at least, suspect. Just because if they admit the truth, if they start to call things by their proper names, their world will crash, do you understand? It’s really scary.”
“Pathetic miserable cowards...” Yibo said through his teeth. And Zhan went on: “Anyway, my father told me then that John just couldn’t do anything bad, that I had to trust him, believe that he would lead me on my Way. And I succumbed to that...”
“Trusted your father?”
“Not really, that’s really difficult...” Xiao Zhan sighed with shudder, searching for words. “I was lost, oppressed, scared and didn’t understand how to distinguish between the truth and lies. Did John really do something bad with me or was that just me myself such a sinner and he was really right? Plus parents. Plus the common attitude to John. Plus that I... I decided to deceive myself. I preferred to believe that I was wrong rather than... than my parents betrayed me. I was running away from this thought though I always knew that intuitively. I just really-really didn’t want to admit that.”
“Zhan...” Yibo didn’t know how to support, didn’t know how to help and was he actually able to? He just held his beloved’s hand and listened. He didn’t already need to push Xiao Zhan on speaking, words poured out of him like a river.
“I accepted that as a verity, tried... tried to live with it, to change my attitude to what was happening. For some time...” here Xiao Zhan chuckled really bitterly, “for some time I even thought I fell in love with John. I felt chosen because he marked me out of all other boys. I knew he took everyone for blessings but nobody as often as me. He really elevated my parents, our Family became Confidants, we moved to a lighter and more spacious house, I was allowed to learn music because they saw I had capacity for it... John allowed us a lot, gave us a lot of goods, so to speak... I was allowed to learn how to drive and they even bought me a license. For the first time since I was six, I came beyond the perimeter and that was... that was a real culture shock for me, as they say. To get the opportunity to go beyond the perimeter I was ready to put up with anything from John... But along with it began my insight. Step by step I started to explore the real world: snippets of conversation, some TV programs, some sellers at supermarkets that were watching, newspapers I bought in Anthony, read and then threw away so as not to bring them to the community... I watched a lot, absorbed everything, listened to, tried to analyze as I only could... Newcomers who came to the Community gave a lot of information for reflection as well. Sometimes at common gatherings with John someone could share their private story. One woman said that she had come to the ranch because her husband had been raping her and then she’d also found out that he’d been a pedophile. She couldn’t stand the shame and escaped from the whole world here, with us. With a clean society. I’d heard the word pedophile from her for the first time in my life. And, on the first opportunity, I tried to learn about pedohiles beyond the perimeter. Who they are and what they are. And I... generally, everything came into place.”
He laughed mirthlessly. Zhan’s hand was already sweat in Yibo’s hands, it was wet and hot but he still didn’t let go of it. They were coming to the epilogue:
“I’m telling you fast but, actually, all that search, doubts, fears took me long years. John’s wife delegated me the choir and I... understood that John didn’t simply stop at me.”
“How old were you when you started to rule the choir?”
“I started when I was eighteen, together with his deceased wife, and alone – when I was twenty.”
“Did he keep raping you all that time?”
“Over the years, since I started to grow up, he began to stop desiring me. When I turned eighteen he almost stopped paying attention to me, I was happy for the first time, thought that I’d suffered enough, that I was too old for him now and didn’t interest him any longer... But when I understood who was now under attack...”
Xiao Zhan suddenly fell silent and Wang Yibo felt as he unclenched his fingers. Now his palm was weakly resting in his hand and for some reason it hurt him badly. An unpleasant guess came into his mind, he didn’t want to ask but Yibo understood that this evening he had to lance all boils. Let all the pus come out at once.
“And what did you undertake?"
Xiao Zhan was silent. Wang Yibo noticed himself as his own fingers unclenched: “What are you doing for these children? Zhan?”
Instead of answer: “Sorry, Yibo.”
“Zhan!”
“I shouldn’t have reciprocated your feelings at all. I should have just rejected your offer to go to El Paso. I should have just passed by.”
“Zhan...”
“I ask him to take me instead of a child,” the man said clearly. His voice was desperate, almost mad, as if at a person who was jumping into deep waters, “and sometimes he agrees.”
Wang Yibo jumped up from his place out of emotions, looked at Xiao Zhan’s side though he saw only his silhouette. The man waited for his sentence. Wang Yibo was in a mess:
“Do you... do you offer yourself to him voluntarily? And... and now?”
“I do, Yibo.”
“And... and after we met?”
“Yes, Yibo.”
“And... and even after we...”
“Yes. I’m sorry.”
That hurt. That hurt so damn much! Everything twisted inside of him, his eyes burned.
“Zhan, and this Monday, when Mark came back home, you...?”
“I did, Yibo. John agreed to let Mark go and I took his place.”
“Okay, stop,” Yibo succumbed to his impulse even before he realized it. “Enough, I don’t want to hear it anymore!”
“Yibo!”
He started to feel the way out of the barn when he heard Xiao Zhan fiddling, standing up from his place.
“Zhan, sorry, I can’t anymore...”
“Yibo!”
“Sorry, Zhan, understand me, I need to be left alone to think, I... it’s too much for me, it’s difficult.”
“Yibo!” he gripped on his pajamas at the very exit, Xiao Zhan’s breath scorched his face. “Yibo, will you come back?”
“Zhan, let me go...”
“Yibo, I’m sorry, so sorry, I’m so selfish, Yibo, tell me that nothing is over between us, I beg you, Yibo...”
“Zhan, please... I need to think,” he pulled Zhan’s hands away from him and went away fast, leaving him alone.

Just turning round the corner of a neighboring house Yibo ran, he couldn’t even walk calmly. He needed to run, as if he could run away from all that pain, shock, and from the fact the whole world got upside down for him. There was so much pain inside that he couldn’t understand why it hurt, and if that pain was Xiao Zhan’s or his own.
He almost missed the night patrol because of his emotions and was about to get caught but managed to hide behind a house just on time. When he squeezed through the restroom window again then he stood there for some time, peering his own reflection in the dim mirror above the sink. There was a noise in his head, a mess. Yibo washed his face and quietly went out of the toilet, getting into his bed. He knew he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep but as soon as he was in the tightness of his bed he also felt panic waving through him, letting out all his seething emotions outside. Wang Yibo bit down on the pillow corner and started to cry, not even trying to hold it back.

Chapter Text

Yibo managed to lose himself in nervous light sleep in the morning, and the march from the speakers hit his brains roughly. He jumped up like a mad but felt his head got dizzy, getting down from the bed, and fell into the aisle between beds, attracting the attention of all the laborers.

“Yibo, what’s the matter?” Ron got frightened.

“Hey, bro, get up...” Berthold pulled his hand, helping to get back on his feet.

“Sorry, I’m just...” Yibo mumbled.

“You look sick,” Santiago frowned. “Maybe you’re contagious?”

“Hey, get here,” Fred’s big hand fished him out from the pile of the crowd of laborers. Block prefect dragged the guy to the side, put both hands on Yibo’s shoulders, looked attentively, “What’s the matter with you?”

“That’s because of insomnia, Fred, sorry,” Yibo mumbled, averting his eyes.

“I heard you crying at night. Woke up myself from a nightmare and you were there, sobbing,” Fred was talking without any judgment or mockery, just as a matter of fact. “What happened?

Yibo’s brain didn’t want to work, it was so lazy, he barely made up an excuse:

“On Friday I... broke all bonds with that world. I told my mom a pack of lies, I’ve not heard a voice of my father for ages... I was so nervous.”

“Such a late reaction,” Fred gave a hum. “You were okay on Saturday morning.”

“Maybe, that’s late...”

“You know what?” Fred slapped his shoulder. “Go to the medical post. Don’t even show up in front of me with such a swollen face. Ron will see you off.”

This rude concern on Fred’s part even touched Yibo. Ron really saw Yibo off to the medical post after breakfast, reasoning along the way that they were now going to Brother Zhan with Sung Joo, because wall papers should have already dried and they had to bring furniture back to the room. Yibo didn’t want to listen to him. He only managed to cry the day before, let out his emotions and didn’t even think about everything he’d heard the previous night.

Ron left him in front of the medical post and Yibo entered a quiet light room, a spacious clean house: white curtains, a white screen, a desk and near – a couch with oilcloth. Two couches, a bunch of cupboards with medications and, surprisingly, a fridge – probably for those medications that had to be kept at low temperature. It seemed, there was no one at the medical post.

“Hello?” Yibo called hesitantly. “Is anybody here?”

It turned out there was a white door on the side that almost merged with the wall. It opened and... an Asian went out to meet Yibo! A handsome one, by the way. Yibo didn’t even understand as he gasped out of surprise. The guy was almost of his age, in a white doctor coat. He kept his hands in pockets and also arched a brow in surprise, having seen the stranger:

“Are you a laborer?”

“I am,” Yibo lingered somehow. “A prefect sent me here.”

A doctor, a nurse, second handsome man after Xiao Zhan that Yibo had ever seen in his life – whoever he was, sat at the desk and fished out from its depths an ordinary schoolish exercise notebook:

“What’s your name?”

“Yibo. Wang Yibo,” the guy just watched him writing his name on the title page. Was he making a kind of medical card for him or something?

“Stone age”, he thought and smiled for some reason. A nurse (Yibo couldn’t dare call him a doctor yet), really asked him about everything he had to in such cases: how old he was, his height and weight, blood type, chronic diseases and many other things. He was writing everything down and Yibo was looking at the medical post, things that were on his desk and the nurse himself, of course.

In this community there were more Asians than in all of Anthony, for sure. John seemed to have done a great tour around Asian countries, since so many people from there followed him. Judging by his age, this guy was the same age as Xiao Zhan. He wondered, what if he was a Nightingale of John once?

“What’s your name?” Yibo asked for some reason.

The guy lifted his eyes on him (yes, his eyes were really beautiful), smiled politely:

“Seung Yeon. Cho Seung Yeon,” there was some flash of recognition in his mind: he had already heard this name. Maybe someone from the laborers had mentioned it? “What problems have you come here with, Wang Yibo?”

The man shrugged:

“Yeah, to be honest, I don’t have any. Just didn’t sleep enough, my head is dizzy for some reason therefore the prefect...”

“Didn’t sleep enough because you were crying?” Cho Seung Yeon just asked, still filling the hand-made card.

Yibo broke off, looked at the nurse with suspicion:

“How do you know?”

“You have a look on your face,” he chuckled, not lifting eyes. “Did anything happen?”

Because of lack of sleep Yibo perceived everything as with raw nerves, he answered a little angrily because everyone wanted to get into his soul:

“Broke up with parents and friends from that world. Nothing special.”

“Hmm... alright then. How long have you been here?”

“A month.”

Cho Seung Yeon nodded as if “okay, clear.”

“Do you want antidepressants?” Seung Yeon asked in an ordinary tone as if he offered them to everyone he met. “I have some light, non-prescription. It’ll help you perk up.”

Yibo hesitated. He had never taken any antidepressants, the nurse just chuckled:

“At first, we get rid of your stress and then you will sleep in,” he nodded at empty couches in the corner. “Thanks to that it’s Sunday today, you have the right to get rest. Who’s your mentor?”

“Zhou Yixuan.”

Seung Yeon lifted his eyes on him again, peered with interest and then lowered them again:

“I see. Then what? Will you take the pill?”

Yibo shrugged that the nurse accepted as a silent “yes”. He squeezed one from a blister on his hand, poured some water for him from the transparent jug into the glass.

Yibo took it, then made the bed for himself and turned to the nurse:

“Go straight to bed and sleep, just like that?”

“Just like that.”

That was unusual itself but Yibo got under the blanket and closed his eyes. He was sure he wouldn’t fall asleep but that was still better than to be stuck in their communal bedroom and try to read John’s books. Especially after what he’d learned about him.

I should just take the chance, to lie in silence and to think deeply about everything, he decided but already in fifteen minutes he felt more relieved. As if someone loaded off his... was that actually the effect of antidepressants? And in five minutes tiredness took over him and Yibo fell asleep.

He had different dreams: here he had a quarrel with Xiao Zhang, shouted at him, grabbed his hand and told him: “Let’s go! Go away from here!” and the man cried and hung back. Here they kissed with Xiao Zhang. And here suddenly Yibo was a little boy with an injured knee, he felt John’s presence somewhere near him and above him, the man leaned over him and said: “What do we have here? Let me see.”

Yibo flinched and woke up. It was still bright outside the window but that surely was already past noon. On the bedside table next to his bed there was a tray with a lunch from the communal dining.

“Woke up?” he heard Seung Yeon’s voice and the man appeared from behind the screen. “I brought you lunch from the dining. Eat.”

Yibo thanked him. Actually all this care suddenly embarrassed him a lot. Did he lose the habit of common social good deeds? Or did he learn to be suspicious of everything for a month here?

Yibo was eating and Seung Yeon told him:

“You’d better sleep a little bit more. But you’ll be able to go to the building site cheerfully tomorrow.”

Yibo didn’t argue. He obediently ate, obediently got back to bed. But this time, of course, he didn’t want to do it. He thought about everything he had to think about, about everything Xiao Zhan had told him. The community “Children of Salvation” appeared in a different light now. In fact, the scale of the shit that was hidden withing its walls even stunned him.

He tried to sort his emotions out and, first and foremost, there was pain. Pain for Xiao Zhan, and pain for his first pure feelings that were hurt. But he wasn’t angry with Xiao Zhan for some reason. He couldn’t blame him, he understood everything, he even admired his bravery to some extent, though he felt that he wouldn’t have done it himself, he would have tried to find another way to solve the problem. Then some simple realization struck him: Zhan was a victim and he thought and acted like one. He had his own logic that Yibo couldn’t understand. It became clear that they needed another conversation, a lot wasn’t still discussed. And Yibo regretted that he cowardly ran away. How was Zhan there now? He should feel bad now. What did he think now about Yibo? He surely thought of him as a coward whose love was only in words.

Of course, his next emotion after pain – a hatred to John. Imagination sweetly drew him some pictures of arbitrariness, bloody and graphically ruthless over the leader. But, sorting all of that in his head, Yibo felt as if he sank into the darkest corners of his soul and felt uncomfortable because of it.

He started thinking what he could possibly do in this situation but the guy had too little information. However, till dinner Yibo managed to create some rough plan of actions. That wasn’t yet a plan of their rescue with Zhan, but just a small draft of initiatives that he could take up so they could progress at least somewhere.

A new tray was placed on his bedside table, and there was Seung Yeon’s voice:
“Wake up, Yibo, here’s dinner. Eat.”

Did he have a nap again?

But he really felt good. Yibo stretched in the bed, thanked the nurse and started to eat, greedily and hungrily as he’d worked at the building site all day before.

“How’re you feeling?”

“Good...”

“Alright. I told Yixuan that you’re here and he’ll come for you soon.”

Yixuan really appeared in ten minutes: nodded to Seung Yeon, slapped Yibo’s back.

“Is everything okay?” he asked with compassion when they left the medical post and set off to the house of laborers. “Seung Yeon said that you were on the verge of nervous breakdown.”

Yibo got embarrassed:

“He exaggerated. I just... just didn’t sleep well.”

Yixuan asked quietly:

“Was that your body’s late reaction to those three Friday calls?”

“It might be...” Yibo dragged and then finally nodded. “Yes. I think it was. Sorry, I didn’t expect it myself.”

“Stress can appear in different forms, you’re not guilty,” Yixuan looked in his eyes sympathetically. “Maybe it’s me who oppressed you so much?

“Yixuan, no, I just...” Yibo was completely confused.

“What?”

“It’s alright, just... I didn’t expect...”

“What?”

“Didn’t expect all of that... Seung Yeon made me sleep, brought me food twice a day, then you came to ask about my health, now you’re seeing me off to the house of laborers...”

Yixuan laughed:

“It means you didn’t expect that someone could genuinely need you here and think that you are important?”

Yibo chuckled and responded evasively:

“Actually, vice versa. I sharply feel that I’m needed and important here. That’s why I stayed.”

Yixuan gave him an attentive look:

“These are very good words. I’m glad that even despite our express method you’re still moving in the right direction...”

“By the way I wanted to talk to you about it,” Yibo chose words. Ha-ha, sometimes he was amused by that in Xiao Zhan. “It seems to me that I’m ready to take the exam earlier. Of course, if you want to wait till your birthday just for a comfortable opportunity, that I’ll understand but... I’d like to join the Brotherhood even earlier.”

Yixuan looked at him attentively, peered, frowned:

“What is your haste motivated by?”

“I don’t want to have any options left or a chance to turn back,” Yibo answered, he didn’t even lie. “It burdens me. It would be even easier without all of that. To burn the bridges and be done with it.”

Yixuan thought over his words, and put his hand behind his back. They almost reached the house of laborers and just stood not far from the entrance.

“I’ll think over your offer,” Yixuan answered, “I will discuss it with my father and mother... Maybe it would be really easier for you like that. And here...” the guy smiled. “For you sometimes, I mean all laborers, it’s important to be given some emotional relief, anyway, now I see it. It seems you liked our choir “Nightingales”, didn’t you?”

Yibo lifted an interested look on him.

“I did... and what?”

“Next Sunday our choir director, Xiao Zhan (do you remember him?) has his birthday. They’ll give a big concert, for an hour and a half. Will sing a lot of songs. Do you want me to ask my father to let you all see it?”

“Xiao Zhan’s birthday?” Yibo repeated and then caught himself. “Oh, sure, an excellent offer, Yixuan! Of course, we want to! That would be really great!”

Yixuan smiled gladly, and then Fred went from around the corner. Men involuntarily looked at him.

“Brother Yixuan,” he nodded respectfully at him. “Sorry, I unwillingly interrupted your conversation.”

“What were you doing there, Fred?” Yixuan asked simply just like that, but Fred’s answer made him alert.

“I noticed trails on the wall, under the window, strange trails,” he replied. “Trails of boots... As if... someone climbed through the window.”

Yibo felt as his back drenched in cold sweat and then Fred shifted look from Yixuan to him and back:

“They are clearly seen on a whitewash... Very strange.”

“Footprints?” Yixuan’s brows furrowed, just like his father. “Will you show me?”

They went around the house and came to the side entrance, approaching the window in the restroom. Really, on the house’s wall there were some clear footprints of Yibo, surely left by him when he was climbing through the little window after coming back from Xiao Zhan.

Dumb jackass, you didn’t even think about it, what an idiot, he scolded himself in his mind.

“Someone really tried to climb through the window,” Yixuan gave a hum.

Yibo’s hands got sweaty:

“Or someone was kicking the wall in anger,” Yibo offered but his voice sounded hesitantly.

And at this moment Fred turned head and looked at him silently:

Fuck, he knows, he knows everything! his mind cried in a hysterical seizure, at the same moment Yibo was petrified.

“Yixuan, I wanted to talk with you about something else,” Yibo heard his own voice as if from afar, so much his heart beated. “Let’s get away?”

The guy nodded to him and slapped Fred’s shoulder:

“Keep looking, Fred, in any case it’s breaking the rules. Someone should wash this wall tomorrow.”

Yixuan and him went to the side, leaving Fred alone but Yibo was sure for some reason that he heard each of his words.

“What else did you want to talk about?”

“About Fred,” the guy squeezed from himself.

“Does he pick on you?”

“No, he doesn’t,” the laborer shaked his head. “He’s strict but fair, I... I just wanted to ask you, why hasn’t Fred still joined the Brotherhood?”

Yixuan moaned with disappointment as if “ok, you too” and even took a couple of steps away from him:

“Did he ask you to talk to me?”

“No,” Yibo answered sincerely, “he didn’t. It’s me. It’s my initiative. Yixuan, just... isn’t he worthy?”

Zhou Yixuan looked at the horizon: there was a time of a beautiful sunset, everything around was in amberish-yellow-red overflows.

“My father’s heard about this Fred too much already,” he answered unwillingly. “Rose comes to him with this question every month, as a pilgrimage. William asks from time to time.. I suspect this is because my father doesn’t want him to be promoted although he never said it directly.”

“Why?” Yibo held breath for some reason.

Yixuan looked at him with a doubt:

“I have to be sure it will stay between us.”

“I give you my word,” he answered firmly.

“What do you know about Fred’s past? Who was he before the community?”

“A builder,” Yibo said right away. “He said he’d spent half of his life at the building site.”

“Hm, really? I wonder, where did he spent another half of his life then?” Yixuan smiled, but without much fun. “I don’t know exactly, Yibo, but once I heard a piece of conversation of my father with Fred’s mentor. I understood from their talk that Fred had some... hm, criminal past beyond the perimeter. I don’t know what exactly he did and what he is guilty of. But according to the direct order of my father Fred’s mentor neglected his responsibilities so much. We can’t kick him out because he’s an ideal laborer. But a lot of people from the Familial and Confidants are afraid of him. That’s why my father slows down his promotion as much as he can. He just cares about his people, that’s it.”

Yibo wanted to object that every person deserved the second chance and who could better understand it rather than them. He wanted to say that rehabilitation programs for former criminals existed even beyond the perimeter, but all these smart arguments came to him much later when he was lying in his bed and sorting out his talk with Yixuan. And at that moment he was lost and didn’t find what to say and his mentor just said goodbye to him and went away.

Well, at least he kept his promise, given to Fred: talked to Yixuan.

“Yibo’s come! Yibo, how’re you feeling?” Ron met him, cheerful as usual.

“Alright,” the guy smiled weakly at him and the man grabbed his hand and led to his beds. On the bedside table there was a big dish with a waffle towel and there was left a little piece of a pie, so thin that it was always translucent.

“Here, that’s from Brother Zhan!”

Yibo lifted almost scared look at Ron:

“For me?”

“Ok, for all of us! I saved a little piece for you, because Brother Zhan told us to treat everyone!”

Somehow Yibo felt a lump in his throat. He stretched an arm to the piece and carefully put it on his hand.

“Is it an apple pie?”

“Yes. How do you know?”

Instead of an answer Yibo instantly bit almost a half and closed his eyes: yes, that was the same taste.

I remember that day too, Zhan, I felt good too, he thought and suddenly wanted to cry again. I shouldn’t have run away.

“Yibo, you ate the pie but became even sadder,” Ron dragged with frustration.

“You know, Ron, it seems, I offended a good person...”

“Who? Mother?” he asked for some reason.

“And mother too.”

Yes, he should definitely apologize to Xiao Zhan, and his mom.
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*Dear English-speaking readers! In the design of this chapter, I made large spaces between the lines. Tell me, is this format easier to understand? It’s just that in Russia it’s not customary to make large indents, so the first 19 chapters are designed differently.

Chapter Text

Xiao Zhan came to the communal dining for breakfast on Monday morning.

Checks if I’m still here, thought Yibo.

He sat at the same place where he’d sat other days when he’d come, in front of Yibo. And though there were two tables and two rows of male’s heads between them they could still clearly see each other. Zhan was really sad. He cast at Yibo glances full of suffering, and Yibo tried not to stare at him and to chew on his porridge.

Zhan and him needed to talk. Again. They always needed to talk about something. This time Yibo didn’t know how to pull this off because it was Zhan who usually scheduled him a date, chose the most safe and suitable places. What did Xiao Zhan think about him now? How could Yibo convey to him that their relationships didn’t yet break, that he wasn’t going to reject him?

But the guys were able to just cast silent glances at each other.

The week started again with the building site. They went on to decorate the house. Puttying the walls, basement cementing, covering floors – that wasn’t even a full list of what they had to do this week. After the morning work there was a lunch break. And Xiao Zhan came to the communal dining again, looked again at Yibo from a distance as if he was waiting for some sign from him. Maybe that was true. Yibo decided to give him such a sign when he was walking past, heading to work, nodded at him and greeted:

“Good afternoon, Brother Zhan,” he even smiled politely.

Xiao Zhan greedely looked into his eyes, trying to understand what Yibo wanted to convey to him. Did he want to send him a message or was that just a formal politeness?

Zhan didn’t appear at dinner.

Fred came up to Yibo in the evening and said:

“Yibo, I order you to wipe off those footprints from the wall under the window, do you remember?” the guy completely regrouped inside, got down from his bed. “Take a rag and soap in the restroom, a bucket, if you need and go wash them.”

“Why me?” he asked and looked Fred in the eyes, trying to find and answer for himself: did he suspect or not?

“Why not you?” asked Fred.

“By the way...” Yibo dragged, “I talked to Yixuan, as I promised.”

Fred looked at him expectantly.

“But I’m not sure it’ll change anything,” he confessed bitterly, and Fred just chuckled mirthlessly:

“I knew that.”

He went away and Yibo went for a bucket and a rag.

On Tuesday Xiao Zhan appeared at lunch. He looked more cheerful, relaxed. Yibo wanted to signal to him again that everything was fine, left the table the last, dragged at the end of the line of laborers. Almost every laborer greeted him, he nodded at them with a smile and stretched an arm only to Yibo, by the way, first:

“Oh, Wang Yibo, hello!”

Squeezing his narrow palm Yibo already knew that he would find a note in his hand, but everything turned with a bad feeling inside him: that was too open, Xiao Zhan took a risk, he shouldn’t have been like that.

He read a note there, at the building site:

“Today, 22:30, the same barn.” Yibo ripped off the note to tiny pieces and then threw them on the floor at the basement of a house under construction, sinking them in a new layer of cement.

And in the evening after work he saw Fred ordering Santiago and Luciano to put a cage on the window in the restroom from the outside.

Damn, damn, damn, damn!

“Yibo, what are you doing there? Help,” Fred smiled at him and he came to help. He was holding the cage while the men were measuring the spot to drill the wall to put the dowel. He was holding the cage, non-stop cursing inside, because he didn’t know now how he was supposed to get to “the same barn”.

Everything just led to the same point: Berthold got a toothache in the evening. He was taken to the medical post to Seung Yeon and the man concluded: he had to go to Anthony that was nearby. He wasn’t able to help by himself. They decided to take Berthold there the next day, in the morning, but all the evening and night he was moaning into his pillow. Didn’t sleep himself and didn’t let the rest sleep either.

Of course, Yibo didn’t dare sneak out through the main entrance and didn’t go to any meeting.

Poor Berthold was taken to Anthony in the morning on Wednesday even before breakfast. And Xiao Zhan came again to the dining area. His look was desperate. Yibo’s heart sank when Xiao Zhan and his eyes locked. How long was he waiting for him in that barn? An hour, two, till the morning? What was Xiao Zhan thinking about him now? That he was ignoring him? That he didn’t want to talk, to meet, to have anything in common with him? Did Xiao Zhan get desperate already or did he still hope, waited, tried to understand?

Having seen that Wang Yibo was safe and sound and was sitting in the communal dining as if nothing had happened, Xiao Zhan bitterly pursed lips, and left not even touching his food.

Yibo understood that Xiao Zhan’s behavior looked too strange from the perspective of others. Brothers had surely noticed something, he risked too much! If only he could calm him down, to tell him that everything was okay, to explain that he just couldn’t go to their meetings so easily now.

I wish I could become Brother faster and get the opportunity to talk to Zhan not secretly, thought Yibo. All these rules and restrictions slowed down their communication so much. They wasted so much time!

On Wednesday in the evening Yixuan came to him and they went for a walk and conversed, Yibo started to talk again about how he wanted to become Brother faster but saw that his haste looked suspicious. Yixuan frowned in displeasure, said:

“I promised you and I’ll think about it, Yibo, just... there’s no need to hurry up. Take it easy, calm down. We’re already moving very intensively. You’re good, but...”

“Sorry, Yixuan,” he wisely retreated right away, “you’re right, I’m too fast... So what did you want to talk about?”

Xiao Zhan broke down on Thursday. He came to the communal dining at breakfast time and determinedly came up to William:

“A request. Give me three people to decorate the Main Hall for Sunday.”

William lifted tired eyes on him. Brother Zhan had definitely gotten him:

“I have this request. According to the graphics it’s scheduled for Saturday.”

“No,” Xiao Zhan said firmly. “I have a dress rehearsal with a choir on Saturday, I won’t have time to control everything. Today.”

William looked at him with displeasure, tried to explain calmly:

“Today I need people at the building site. Brother Zhan, you should know, John wants the house to be ready till...”

“Today!” Xiao Zhan broke him nervously, and Yibo pursed lips, trying not to look at him. Bad, everything was really bad. Xiao Zhan almost lost control over the situation, and that was him, Yibo, who was guilty in his state. “Please, William, let’s resolve this issue without John’s intervention. We’re not going to bother him with such trivial matters, are we?”

Xiao Zhan looked like a capricious hysteric – that was seen in William’s eyes, but he just threw up his hands wearily:

“Good... Should I detach someone concrete?”

“Yes, I’d take ones who I already know,” Xiao Zhan glanced at the table fast. “Ron, Sung Joo, Yibo, you’ll help me to decorate the Main Hall for Sunday's event.”

“Hurrah!” Ron exclaimed. “Of course, Brother Zhan, I’m so glad, so glad!”

“I’ll always help you, brother,” Sung Joo smiled.

Yibo was silent. He actually wanted to merge with the table and to become totally invisible.

“Excellent,” Zhan said shortly, “I’m waiting for you three in the Main Hall after breakfast.”

And went away with a business-like, wide walk.

William rubbed his nose, sighed:

“Ron, Sung Joo, Yibo, manage to finish Brother Zhan’s task by lunch, then come back to the site. And you, Ron, to your delivery job.”

Yibo was really nervous for some reason when they were walking to the Main Hall, a place for communal gatherings. It was huge and echoing when it was empty. Several dozen rows of benches, a small elevation of the “stage”. Xiao Zhan met them at the entrance:

“Finally here? Good. Let’s go to the utility room. Garland and all the rest are there, in boxes.”

“I knew that you would pull me out of this dreary swamp again!” Sung Joo was happy, putting an arm around his neck. So they went to the utility room, tightly embraced. “Rose tells me I’m staying there for at least another month. If only I knew, bro, that there would be such a penalty, honestly, I would have never kissed her, trust me, it wasn’t worth it...”

Yibo and Ron followed them, there was a visible social distance between these two couples. He didn’t really like that Sung Joo was hanging on Xiao Zhan, the guy heard the answer of the last man:

“Don’t you think that I took you and you will play hooky till lunchtime.”

“Come on!” he exclaimed. “Let’s hang all your little flowers now, bro, and celebrate your birthday on a grand scale!”

All four men squeezed into a small utility room where there were kept different props in boxes.

“These four boxes,” Xiao Zhan showed them. “The artificial flowers and garlands are there. Start with them. Then we’ll take out ribbons. Stepladder is behind the door. I’ll mark with a white tape where you should place bouquets...”

The men started working silently and quickly. Yibo installed the stepladder, Sung Joo climbed up, Ron took out artificial flowers, spraying them and cleaning the dust. At first Xiao Zhan just gave them orders what to do: to hang the biggest bouquet of flowers here, the smaller ones – there. Then he hid again in the utility room and called from there:

“Wang Yibo! Come here, help me!”

Well, actually, he was waiting for this moment. He turned to the lads: Ron was handing garlands to Sung Joo and held the stepladder with his foot, both were busy and didn’t pay attention to him. Yibo headed to the utility room. Xiao Zhan pulled him fast inside and closed the door, blocking it with himself, as if he was afraid that Yibo would run away again. The men were looking at each other. Yibo saw that Zhan was mad, maybe, even desperate. How much time did they have? A minute, two, until it started looking suspicious? Yibo told him fast:

“I am sorry, I wasn’t able to come because they’d put a cage on the window in our restroom. Fred suspects me, it’s dangerous for us to meet now.”

And Zhan exhaled. It seemed, Yibo answered several of his questions at once. He closed his eyes for a moment, said:

“Thank god. I worried so much.”

“But we still have to talk, Zhan.”

“Of course. If you want.”

“I do. But I don’t know how to arrange it...”

“I’ll do something, Yibo.”

“Zhan, listen... I want to pass the exam as fast as possible and to join the Brotherhood,” Yibo whispered fast. “I’ve already talked to Yixuan about it...”

“Yibo, why?”

“So we could freely talk, for us to not risk anymore.”

And then they heard from the Hall a voice of Sung Joo:

“Zhan! Zha-an!”

Xiao Zhan grabbed the door handler, glanced once again at Yibo: there was still so much to say but they didn’t have time.

“You attract too much attention,” Yibo managed to whisper to him. “We should stay quiet for a little.”

Zhan nodded at him and opened the door to meet Sung Joo:

“What do you want?”

“Ron and I have already hung everything, what’s next? Where are your ribbons?”

After lunch all three went back to the building site. Thursday evening passed.

On Friday he had ten-minute call with mother where he was just excusing himself and apologizing:

“Yes, mom, I know how difficult it is for you... Yes, mom, I know I shouldn’t have left like that... But mom, I didn’t have time to call you to ask for advice, the offer was short-term... Mom, sorry, I really can’t call you more often... No, mom, you don’t have to come anywhere...”

That was difficult and tore his heart all the time. But he couldn’t change what had already done.

On Saturday there was again a barbecue at the building site. A lot of men joined laborers, including Xiao Zhan and they applied wallpapers, painted and hung chandeliers together. With the help of common efforts the house was almost ready.

Xiao Zhan was near. He came to the same section of work himself: handed him wallpaper with glue, aligned it below according to the pattern, they often touched each other with shoulders and hands, exchanged glances, smiled. But they couldn’t afford anything else. Other laborers, Yixuan and Sung Joo were nearby.

After finishing work at home all windows and doors were tightly closed, so that everything inside wouldn’t dry out and peel off. Barbeque crackled already. Yibo saw as Xiao Zhan took another plate for him and carried it to treat him but Yixuan was faster and appeared near earlier:

“Here, Yibo, take. We’ve worked well today, haven’t we?”

Yibo saw how Zhan got lost and stopped, went sad. Then he found Fred with his eyes and gave him the plate. The man nodded thankfully, and Zhan came back fast to Brothers and Familial where his mother was pouring stewed-cherry drink.

“Yes, the house is almost ready. William says there is just some stuff left: to put furniture, to hang cupboards, to nail shelves...”

“And tomorrow I’m taking you to the holiday,” Yixuan smiled, he was obviously proud of himself. “If father agrees, maybe you could join the common table.”

“The common?”

“Well, it will be something like here today,” he smiled. “We usually don’t celebrate birthdays with the whole community. Zhan is just a choir director, you get it?”

Yibo got it. He got even more than Yixuan could imagine himself. He could only wonder if Yixuan knew about what his father did? Did he know all the truth about the relationship between John and Xiao Zhan? He really wanted Yixuan not to know. Because he could turn out to be the real bastard. Yibo wouldn’t be able to forgive him.

Sunday came. Laborers were thoroughly getting ready for the evening event. As last time, they ironed their dress shirts, cleaned shoes.

“It would be good to present Brother Zhan with something,” Ron dreamt out loudly.

“Fool, what could you give to a person who already has everything?” asked one of the laborers.

Yibo just chuckled. Was Xiao Zhan in their mind a person who had everything? Funny... From what moment do you start to think so? Where was that border from sensibility to the complete clouded mind?

Give him me, he thought sadly, looking out of the window, waiting for his turn to iron. Settle me in his room. I’m ready to sleep at his feet as a dog. Trust me, you would never find a present better for him.

William took them to the Assembly Hall where they had recently decorated everything so beautifully. As if last time, places for laborers were three last benches. By the way, there were no female laborers that time and this time in the Hall.

Yibo knew about female laborers. Their house was situated in the female block. He also knew that their main duty was to cook at the communal kitchen and to wash for all the community. Even laborers didn’t wash their underwear themselves, leaving them and dirty shirts on their made beds when they left to work. Next day their underwear was back and clean, and was placed on their beds without words. There were their names on the tags on every shirt. On all shirts of Yibo, for example, was stated “Wang Y.B.” atop the name of the former owner. On the headboards of Ron and his bed was also stated his name above Ron’s. You won’t mix it up. As in prison.

Or asylum, Yibo thought sometimes. That was more like the truth.

“What are you thinking about, Yibo?” Yixuan came up to them this time too. Today he was dressed more officially, not less than a wonderful gray fitted suit. Gucci?

“I thought, why didn’t you invite female laborers the last time and not this time even? Shouldn’t they also get rid of stress?” his questions sounded rather feministic in this society. His mom would be proud of him. Yixuan frowned. He did it each time when Yibo asked him uncomfortable questions. But, to his credit, the guy always answered honestly:

“There are three times more female laborers than male. We just don’t have a place to sit them.”

“I think, even standing there they would be glad to be here,” Yibo said directly to him.

He felt that with his words he hooked something deep inside Yixuan, something the guy also thought a lot by himself. And Yixuan didn’t really seem to like it. Sung Joo drove a wedge between them:

“Hey, lads, relax your faces, it’s holiday today! Our dear Xiao Zhan, our main dear Nightingale and little angel has his birthday today. And you, Yibo, always think about women. Lads have already told me. You just came and started to talk about them right away. Remember my words, Yixuan, he will get married here earlier than you and will grab some little house.”

He just chuckled and went to his place in the first row.

Folks gathered. The evenе, as usual, was conducted by Victor. At first they adjusted the microphone, then, finally, there was applause. He started almost like the last time. First and foremost, he said how beautiful was today's evening, that everyone knew why they’d gathered here, then mentioned that everything was organized thanks to John – on his money, then he presented John himself.

He came out to the common whistle, applause, cries of admiration – very handsome. He was wearing a chic black suit that emphasized his posture, breadth of his shoulders and silver of his hair and beard. With an elegant movement he accepted the microphone from Victor’s hands, then greeted everyone and then dragged a speech for three minutes that every Nightingale, either former or current, will always stay his dear little boy, that he will appreciate and remember till the end of his life. Yibo felt nauseous. The hall melted. And today was not even so much a day of one of his Nightingales as a day of all his Nightingales, former, current and future ones. Their common day. Applause. Yibo regretted coming here. He didn’t want now to be present at this “holiday”, he thought about how he was going to endure more close-knit conversation with John when he became Brother. Was he able to do that?

Further John presented the choir himself and Xiao Zhan. They were also greeted very warmly. Zhan and the choir were dressed alike, formal dress clothes – white shirts, ironed black сreased trousers, thin black ties.

Xiao Zhan bowed to the community for the last time, but this time he knew that there was Yibo in the hall and looked at him. Zhan didn’t look for him with his eyes but Yibo felt that this moment Zhan thought about him.

A small ensemble was sitting at the wall of the Assembly Hall: a trumpet, two violins, a cello and a flute. On the side, in the corner, there was the grand piano of Xiao Zhan. Previous time there was no musical accompaniment, the choir sang a capella, and this time the whole concert was supposed to be with music and it chilled Wang Yibo to the bone.

They started with that song that Xiao Zhan wrote himself and presented the last time. Listening again to these beautiful children’s voices and knowing already all the truth about the choir, Yibo was trembling inside. Each of them, every boy who was now standing in from of him with a thin tie, had been harrased and raped by their main listener, sitting in the first row. And he was now looking at them, examining their little children's shapes, children’s bodies, looked them in the eyes and was choosing. And they saw it.

Yibo understood he was crying when his own hot tears fell on his hands.

“Yibo, come on?” Santiago poked him in the shoulder, he sat to the left of him. “Stop crying, don’t be a baby.”

Ron just smiled understandingly at him. Yibo looked sideways at Sung Joo who sat two people away from him. He calmly listened to the choir, it seemed his face didn’t show anything but a light boredom. Was he raped by John? What did he feel now?

They were singing like that for about an hour, all their repertoire, those songs that Yibo had already heard, and others were, probably, really old. Sometimes residents of the community sang along quietly, some women cried and men no-no but wiped eyes secretly. Children were cute, heartwarming and absolutely defenseless. Appeared in all their fragility in front of these people. Yibo wondered, did no one in this community really want to know and see anything, like Zhan’s parents, or did they suppress the obvious knowledge within themselves, like Mark Tomashevsky’s parents?

And then Xiao Zhan bowed, people applauded him, and then he suddenly stretched a hand for the microphone and the stand, readjusted it a little lower than his height. Slouching a little, he said in the mic:

“I want to say thank you, the choir and me, we thank you for your love and support,” a wave of applause. “And now I, maybe for the first time, am using the chance that it’s my birthday today and I can do everything...” little chuckles among gathered people, “... I’m going to misbehave a little. Lads and I, we have prepared a surprise for you today.”

Xiao Zhan approached the grand piano with a sweeping step, taking with him the mic stand, adjusted it again, sitting at the instrument and then suddenly started playing “Bohemian Rhapsody”. And the choir sang!

That was something incredible! People quieted down, got tensed in a silent shock, but Xiao Zhan was playing confidently and sang along to the boys especially at solo parts of Freddie Mercury. Yibo’s jaw dropped. He felt as the Hall started to wake up with recognizing, how people started to get nervous, as they gradually perked up, especially those who had lived beyond the perimeter at the time this song had been popular. Some kind of mess started throughout the room, and the choir sang beautifully, dividing into four and even five voices.

Zhan played, his fingers flew across the keyboard fast and masterfully, he committed so much passion into his playing and vocals that even Yibo in his pre-last row could see how his forehead was covered with sweat. His neat hair got messy, there was fire in his eyes, and some phrases from his mouth, and from the mouths of the boys sounded like a message, especially:

“Spare him his life from this monstrosity!” the boys sang.

“Easy come easy go. Will you let me go!” Zhan echoed them.

“Bismillah! No - we will not let you go!” the choir splitted into “angels” and “demons”.

And when he sang:

“Oh mama mia, mama mia, mama mia let me go!” then his fingers flew across the keys in some inhumane speed, imitating a guitar solo that was supposed to be in this moment. Zhan invested so much energy into it and Yibo suddenly understood that it was a protest. That was his protest, the only kind that this man could have. Xiao Zhan couldn’t stand in front of everyone and say: “Good people, this man has been raping me since I was twelve,” but he couldn’t obey fully, he could give a rise to disobedience in hearts of other people, at his own risk.

“So you think you can stone me and spit in my eye!” he sang with his face turned to people and Yibo was sure for some reason that Zhan was looking at him right across the dozens of rows. “So you think you can love me and leave me to die? Oh baby - can't do this to me baby. Just gotta get out - just gotta get right outta here.”

Wang Yibo forgot how to breathe. He understood what Xiao Zhan wanted to convey to him. And not only to him, probably.

“Ooh yeah, ooh yeah, nothing really matters... Anyone can see: Nothing really matters... Nothing really matters to me... Anyway the wind blows...” the choir finished singing softly, clapping their hands in sync at the end. Then silence fell.

And people burst with applause! Such excitement rose around that Yibo got scared that all of them were going to throw themselves at Xiao Zhan! Everyone trembled in feverish arousal, some shouts were heard separately: “Zhan! Good job! We love you! You’re the best!” men and women jumped up from their places. Even laborers, forgetting they had to sit silently, shouted something but Yibo, unlike them, froze somehow. He was terrified. Because he felt that Zhan with his prank, seemingly innocent, had stirred something up in these peoples’ hearts and souls. And he didn’t know what he was going to have for it now.

Xiao Zhan looked exhausted, as if he’d given away to the last song all his powers left. He breathed heavily and hardly stood up, bowing to the community residents. Victor rushed to him indignantly, taking out the microphone from the stand and tried to calm people:

“Now, now, please, calm down!”

But he didn’t have enough credibility to calm the crowd, but John had plenty of it, so he stood up next. He gave a sign with his hand for everyone to sit and quiet down, gradually the wave of excitement fell, people habitually got silent, looking at their leader.

Yibo saw that John wasn’t happy. Rage was coming under his mask of a forced smile, he looked even a little confused, seemingly not having expected such a prank from his main Nightingale. John even laughed forcefully and demonstratively applauded to the choir and Xiao Zhan:

“What a surprise, Zhan, wouldn't you say,” he smiled but his eyes didn’t at all. “I think we can let little children go. They have worked great today. Let’s applaud them.”

The choir bowed and filed out the side door. Xiao Zhan also bowed to everyone, went and sat in his place that was in the second row. The Confidant. He sat at the edge, Yibo saw only the dark top of his head, but he could see John perfectly. The man straightened his jacket with an elegant light movement, pulled up his sleeves and said in the microphone almost sarcastically:

“Where did you know this song, Xiao Zhan? Maybe from your trips beyond the perimeter?”

Xiao Zhan slightly lowered his head and didn’t look at John.

“Art, my friends,” John sighed, “is able to get through even a desert, even behind the gates of the closed community... A good song... So, well, is it time to give a present?”

It wasn’t anything good in his words for some reason. Wang Yibo just stiffened all over, watching as he approached Xiao Zhan and leaned on the headboard of the bench with his buttocks. He was standing so closely to Xiao Zhan, almost leaned over him and looked down at him almost affectionately, lovingly, but he seemed a maniac to Wang Yibo at that moment:

“My main Nightingale... Forever – my most favorite boy... Children grow up so fast. And you’ve already grown up, become adult, independent, think for yourself, rush, strive somewhere... Maybe it’s time you were let go off the nest and were given the opportunity to start an independent, adult life.”

Intrigued whisper among the people present. Xiao Zhan still didn’t lift up his head.

“We have built a new house here,” John went on, “and I want to give it to you.”
Common “ah” swept along the rows, Yibo even twitched out of surprise. Would the house they had built be given to Xiao Zhan?!

“It will be yours,” John went on saying into the microphone so everyone could hear. “The whole house, Xiao Zhan. You’ve deserved it. Like no one.”

Everyone applauded again, congratulating Xiao Zhan right away, but John calmed them down just with the wave of a hand (that’s who was a real orchestra director here) and continued:

“But only a married couple can enter the house, Zhan, you know the rules.”

Everybody fell silent in a moment, and a sigh of anticipation swept through the female part that, of course, wasn’t left unnoticed.

“Maybe it’s time to wed you, Zhan?” John went on mocking. “Adult independent life, as you wanted it, dear, with a wife and a child. Mm? What do you think?”

He brought the microphone to Xiao Zhan’s lips, and first Yibo heard his breath and then a silent:

“I don’t want, John...”

“What? Didn’t I understand?” he oppressed. “Say it louder.”

“I don’t want to get married, John.”

“Really?” he pretended to be surprised. “And what do you want, then?”

Yibo saw how difficult the words were for Xiao Zhan. He hesitated for a moment and then finally lifted eyes on John and met his sight as if asking for apology:

“I want to stay your Nightingale, John.”

He said it in full silence, and Yibo felt a sting in his heart. He grabbed onto his bench until his knuckles turned white, keeping eyes on him.

John seemed to soften, stretched a hand to Zhan, affectionately touched his cheek:

“I know, my boy. It couldn’t be otherwise.”

Somehow everyone started smiling. Wang Yibo didn’t understand at all and, moreover, didn’t share the reaction of others. It seemed to him there were mad people around him. Was he really the only one who thought like that?

“So what should I do with the house?” John asked again. “It’s yours. I’ve already given it to you. What are you going to do with my present?”

“Give it to others, John,” Xiao Zhan asked almost wearily.

“Choose by yourself, my boy, who would you like to give this house to?”

Xiao Zhan turned to the others, his sight was already extinct and didn’t almost show anything:

“Give it to Romeo and Miyami. Bless them, John, they’ve wanted that for so long.”

The Hall bursted in shouts of approval again. Yibo saw as some blonde guy jumped up from his place with a face blushing all over, and as on the female part a girl who looked Asian started crying out of happiness.

John spread his hands out as if saying: ah, youth, what am I supposed to do with you?” Then he said shortly in the mic:

“A wish of the birthday-boy is a law to me!”

And here people really couldn't resist, they jumped up from their places: someone rushed to thank Xiao Zhan and John, someone – to hug Romeo, someone – to Miyami. Even Ron started crying and hugged Yibo’s neck:

“Romeo and Julliet will finally be together, Yibo! We have still built a house for them! Isn’t it a miracle?! Isn’t it the best place on earth?!”

Yibo went silent dejectedly. He’d had to live through a lot of emotions for the last two hours. William came up to them:

“Don’t go anywhere. We are having a common feast now, you are allowed to be present, and then you’ll clean everything here, you got it?”

Yibo noticed sideways as John grabbed Xiao Zhan’s hand and, under the guise, led him to the utility room. Yibo’s heart beat loudly with an uneasy feeling. He jumped from his place and jogged after them, coursing around the people. The guy didn’t know what he would say or do, he just felt that nothing good awaited Xiao Zhan in that room and he couldn’t stay still.

On the approach he already heard the sound of a slap and then John’s words:

“...he’s gotta get out of here, huh, bastard!”

Yibo hastily pulled the door and, to his own surprise, it turned out to be not closed. Xiao Zhan and John appeared in front of his eyes. Zhan was with messy hair and a red, starting to burn cheek, John held his neck with one hand and raised an arm for another slap. In their pose, in everything he could feel that John somehow owned Xiao Zhan. Men lifted their heads on him and Yibo instantly collected himself, respectfully dropped his eyes:

“Oh, John... Brother Zhan... sorry.”

But he didn’t close the door.

“And who is it?” John roared.

“One of the laborers,” Zhan said hollowly.

“And what’s he doing here?!” John doesn’t even speak directly to Yibo.

“Sorry, I... Brother Zhan, when should we start putting the decorations back in boxes?” at that moment Yibo couldn’t come up with something better.

“Father!” Yixuan momentarily appeared near them, patronizingly putting an arm on Yibo’s shoulder. “Let me introduce you, this is Wang Yibo, my ward. Do you remember? I told you about him.”

“Watch your ward,” John threw scornfully at him and went out of the utility room.

“What is going on here?” Yixuan shifted eyes to Yibo and Zhan and back.

“I wanted to ask when we should start to remove the decorations in the room,” the laborer repeated stubbornly.

“At the end of the celebration,” Xiao Zhan answered and left too.

“Celebration” dragged on till the night. The original celebration of Zhan’s birthday turned into the celebration of the engagement of the main couple of the community. People were eating and drinking, music was playing, everyone was resting at their pleasure. The group of laborers was silently sitting at the side, sometimes someone from Brothers or Sisters brought them treatments from the table. Xiao Zhan didn’t come up to them. Yibo understood that he kept distance because of the caution. Yibo had still managed to attract John’s attention already. But it was still difficult for him to see how Xiao Zhan tried to have fun but he was obviously not fun, how he endured John’s touches, his pats as if occasionally, some jokes that Yibo didn’t hear.

He was proud of Xiao Zhan, and at the same time he sympathized with him. He saw that there was a rioter inside Xiao Zhan but he didn’t have enough power to resist John all the time. How many times had John already broke his inner core and in the end subordinated it to his will?

Xiao Zhan went out of the celebration first of all people, together with his parents and the Familial. Then women started to get ready to leave, Brothers left the last. Laborers cleaned the table for two more hours, which was standing in the open air. Folded the tablecloths, removed tables and benches, took dirty dishes to the dining.

Finally, their “celebration” finished.

Wang Yibo came back to the house of laborers absolutely devastated. Having lain in his bunk, he thought a lot more about the event of the day, and only one thought shone within him like a guiding star: he had to join the Brotherhood as fast as possible and to organize the plan how to escape from the community with Xiao Zhan. But that was not the only thing he wanted to discuss with him.

The young boy had ambitious plans and he wanted to implement them gradually. Otherwise he was not Wang Yibo.

Chapter Text

The whole community had been buzzing since Monday, discussing the lastest news again and again: John had given Xiao Zhan a house and he’d given it to the poor lovers, Romeo and Juliette, having asked John to give them a blessing. And John was going to do it. Despite that Hatsumoto Miyami’s father was against it, he still took the side of lovers on the request of Xiao Zhan. Glory to Xiao Zhan! Glory to John! It seemed, everyone forgot about Xiao Zhan’s trick and his performance of “Bohemian rhapsody”.

On Monday laborers were finishing with the house: brought and arranged furniture, put up shelves and mirrors. Yibo perfectly understood why Brothers and Sisters strived to get closer to each other and make a couple. They got a wonderful house with everything ready in it, without loans and mortgages, a piece of their own space, just listen to John till the end of your life and that’s it. He wondered, how many honest Americans would change their freedom of choice to the opportunity to never pay loans anymore?

William divided laborers into groups on Tuesday: some when to the warehouse, some – to the Domestic block, Yibo was told to go to the medical post:

“They need a cleaning there every week, plus washing the windows. You’ll have a job for the whole day.”

The guy didn’t mind working in the quiet, a light house, where your only watchmen was a handsome korean guy. He set off there after breakfast and Cho Seung Yeon even recognized him:

“Oh, Wang Yibo? Did they send you for cleaning?”

“Show me what to do,” he just smiled.

“Start with washing the windows. Can you clean a conditioner?”

“No.”

“That’s a pity, I’ll have to ask Brother Jean, well okay,” Seung Yeon was very calm, he silently filled in some papers.

Yibo opened the windows, took the basin, some rags and old newspapers, Seung Yeon even moved his table from the window and told him:

“Call me when you’re finished with it. I’ll be in the recreation room,” and walked out the next door.

Yibo silently worked, the day was coming closer to lunch when the door opened and Xiao Zhan appeared at the door.

This meeting, not contrived by any of them, became the real unexpectancy for both. Guys froze, staring at each other, then Xiao Zhan quickly glanced at the room and whispered him:

“What are you doing here?”

“Washing the windows,” Yibo answered silly, “and you?”

Seung Yeon came out of the room to the sound of the opened door:

“Ah, Zhan... Hi. Weren’t you supposed to come tomorrow?”

“Well, I’ve decided to come today,” he answered. “I’ve come by chance...”

“I’m having cleaning now,” the nurse nodded at Yibo.

“He won’t be a problem,” Xiao Zhan shrugged and came to the bed covered with oilcloth, fencing himself with a screen.

Yibo was really intrigued by everything that happened there but Seung Yeon still told him:

“Get down, you’ll finish later. Wait in the next room. I’ll call you when Brother Zhan and I are done.”

Yibo could only nod, get down from the window and lock himself in the next room. Not even in the room, in the little room with a sagged sofa and a blanket, shelves with various jars and bulbs of all kinds. But he didn’t really care about the room at that moment, he was listening with all his might to what was happening behind the door.

At first, there was some rustling, then maybe a sound of trousers being undone, after that Xiao Zhan said something that Yibo didn’t hear and then Seung Yeon said clearly:

“Help me with your hands.”

Then silence. And after that Xiao Zhan:

“Ah!”

And Seung Yeon:

“Be patient.”

Silence again. Rustling. Seung Yeon’s voice:

“You’re okay, stop imagining things. One more month with rectal suppositories and ointments, drink more water and that’s it. Get dressed.”

Rustling. Seung Yeon’s voice:

“Wang Yibo, you can come back!”

Yibo carefully opened the door. Seung Yeon wrote something in his improvised medical records, Xiao Zhan looked a little embarrassed. Laborer got back to the window without saying anything and started to wash it.

“Can I stay at you today?” he heard Xiao Zhan’s voice behind his back, but, of course, Yibo understood that the question was addressed to Seung Yeon.

“What happened?” he asked, not breaking away from notes.

“I don’t want to go home,” Xiao Zhan admitted unwillingly. “My mother’s been driving me crazy already for two days.”

“Is that why you came earlier for the examination?” Seung Yeon chuckled.

“Yes.”

“Why’s she been giving you hard times?”

“Because of the song.”

Seung Yeon chuckled once again, Yibo also involuntarily smiled.

“Everyone’s already forgotten about it,” said the nurse. “They all are talking about the soon engagement of Romeo and Juliette.”

“But not her...”

Seung Yeon shrugged:

“Stay if you want, but I’m going to Las Cruces with Sister Ursula after lunch, she has an appointment for an MRI.”

“No problem,” Zhan shrugged too. “Do you want me to make sure your laborer finishes working here properly?”

“William is coming in any case, I’ve warned him.”

Yibo got disappointed after those words. It would be great if Xiao Zhan and him would stay alone. Then they could definitely discuss everything they wanted, and probably not only that. But, as usual, they had to be content with little.

Yibo silently went on cleaning: finished with windows, took out the stepladder from the utility room, climbed up to dust the shades and lamps above. Xiao Zhan came into the recreation room, rummaged there and then there was his question:

“Seung Yeon, do you have something to read?”

“What something do you mean?” Seung Yeon asked calmly.

“You got me. Something that’s not from J. R. Cole.”

Yibo suppressed his smile and kept thoroughly cleaning the dust. Seung Yeon squinted at him, answered unwillingly:

“There is a couple of old books behind the door. Look.”

Xiao Zhan rustled, then went out with some worn folio:

“Found some Dostoevsky. Have you read it, Seung Yeon? Is it alright?”

“It’d been here even before me,” Seung Yeon answered, pretending that he’s not related to any illegal literature in the community.

“Ok, let’s see,” Zhan fell on a metal grid bed, not even making it, adjusted a pillow higher and opened the little volume, Yibo was cleaning, Seung Yeon was busy with his papers. Those were several hours till lunch. William came to pick him for lunch and, of course, saw Xiao Zhan. He waved at him:

“Brother William! I’m resting here today!”

“We’ve started to meet more often, Brother Zhan,” William wasn’t really happy with it.

“Rest today if you want. I’m looking after Yibo’s work,” he smiled calmly.

“Thank you,” the man said coldly. “I don’t get tired from my work.”

Xiao Zhan chuckled but didn’t comment on his words, getting back to reading.

“Are you going to lunch?” Seung Yeon asked.

“I’m kinda ill today. Bring me lunch here,” he was capricious.

“Did you hear?” Seung Yeon asked Yibo. “You’ll bring it. I’m going to the female block for Sister Ursula right after lunch.”

“Can Brothers visit the female block?” the laborer asked confusedly.

“Seung Yeon is a guy with privileges!” Xiao Zhan taunted him.

“Look who’s talking,” he retorted coldly. “But no one gives me houses for some reason.”

“Jealousy is a bad feeling, Seung Yeon, I’ve told you,” Zhan responded, when the door closed and three men left the medical post.

Yibo ate fast, hurried, swallowing the pieces, not even chewing on them. He wanted to stay alone with Xiao Zhan as soon as possible. Took his portion, red-handed Hilda covered his tray with a tissue.

When Yibo came back to the medical post, alone, Xiao Zhan was still lying on the bed and reading. William was still having lunch when Yibo left, and the commander of laborers still had to control the rest of the lads so they wouldn’t go to loaf around. How much time did they have? Twenty minutes, or maybe, half an hour.

Xiao Zhan looked at him tensely, almost holding his breath. Yibo entered the room, put a tray on the bedside table and sat on Xiao Zhan’s bed. He didn’t even know what to start with. They just looked each other in the eyes excitedly. Finally, Yibo started first:

“I’m proud of you. And what you have done. That was really beautiful, talented and... bold.”

Xiao Zhan gasped, putting the book aside, stretched and sat on the bed. His eyes were glowing again and their faces were too close:

“Yibo...”

“Sorry that I ran away that day. I shouldn’t have done it.”

Xiao Zhan peered him, trying to understand if everything remained the same between them, or if their relationships changed. He touched Yibo’s fingers with the tips of his own carefully and shyly. Fever went through Yibo’s body out of this innocent touch, and he asked by himself, as on that day, in the car:

“Can I kiss you?”

Xiao Zhan didn’t answer, just leaned forward and kissed him first, and their hands intertwined, Zhan embraced him with his legs, as if being afraid that someone could take Yibo away from him, hugged him pulling against himself. Yibo was above him, between his incredibly long legs, they rubbed their groins against each other, that was some kind of madness, William was going to appear at any minute…

“Let’s go to the recreation room, they won’t at least see us right from the doorway,” Zhan offered and pulled Yibo, dragging him to the little room to a small couch. Yibo penetrated Zhan with his tongue, pulled his belt to himself, Zhan was like a melted metal, flexible, succumbing. He showered kisses on Yibo, lifted hips for him so it would be easier for him to pull his trousers down, he stretched arms to Yibo by himself, undoing his belt as well.

“Yibo, I still can’t there...”

“...we can’t go there, no problem,” Yibo didn’t want to think why exactly they couldn’t do it. He understood that, guessed, he wasn’t a fool. And because of that, in his darkest fantasies he wanted to stab John with a knife, and twist it by himself, just in case, ideally twice.

But that minute he didn’t want to think about John, he wanted only Xiao Zhan. Yibo hooked his cotton underwear pants and looked at his aroused cock surrounded with black hairs:

“Please, Zhan, let me,” he lay lower, inched to the groin with his face. “Damn, I’ve wanted that for so long...”

And he took it instantly as deeply as he could, choked but licked Zhan with all his passion. And now it didn’t seem “cute” to Xiao Zhan. He rolled eyes and moaned, gave in his hips into his mouth, leaned back against the back of the sofa.

“Yibo... “Yibo...”

Wang Yibo was high because of his smell, and his taste, unconsciously kneaded his own balls through the trousers, licked him dog-like, clenched cock at the root and worked on its head.

“God, I’m coming!” Zhan moaned, and then Yibo ripped his own trousers down, climbed up to be with Zhan at the same level and rubbed against him with his hard and leaking dick, making the same frictions with hips. Xiao Zhan looked at their cocks, licked lips and leaned to Yibo with a kiss, and cupped their cocks together, stroking both. Yibo came at the moment Zhan bit his ear and roared, scorching his pinna with a hot breath. Zhan slowed hand movements and whined, kissing him hot and wet, pulling Yibo against himself. He fell on the men, burying face against his neck, they both messed in their own sperm that smeared on their stomachs, but at that moment they didn’t care.

They breathed heavily, getting back to their senses.

“First... we need to clean up...” Zhan whispered. “William can appear at any moment.”

Yibo didn’t want to get up from Zhan. Vice versa: he wanted to lock the door and let it all burn the blue flames... Let them seek them, break through the doors... He wouldn’t let Zhan from his embrace till the last breath, even if they wanted to kill them. But of course, those were foolish thoughts. Yibo slowly got up from the man, his head was even a little bit dizzy. Good that there was a little sink in the restroom and Yibo headed right there, turning on the tap. Zhan followed him. They washed each other, laughed embarrassingly and kissed again. Then Xiao Zhan went serious, asked:

“Didn’t you give up on me even after what you’d learned?”

Yibo closed the tap, found his underwear pants and pulled them on on the wet hips:

“I wasn’t going to give up on you. I was just shocked and needed to think all over it alone. Really, that’s all. I still want to be with you.”

Xiao Zhan pulled on his underwear too and glanced confusedly at Yibo, dubiously, bit lips.

“You’re talking like a man who has something serious on his mind.”

“That’s true,” Yibo took pants, “but we need more time to discuss it all, Zhan. Not ten or twenty minutes. Two hours, not less. Can we arrange something like that when I become a Brother?”

“Of course it won’t be easy but we would have many more opportunities,” Xiao Zhan forcedly agreed, taking on his pants.

“I can’t say that I have a clear plan of actions,” Yibo put on his belt and opened a little window in the room to ventilate it, “but I surely won’t get out of here without you. I’m not going to give up on you.”

They went to the main room where Zhan’s lunch had already gone cold.

“Eat,” Yibo told him. “If William sees that you didn’t even touch the food he will suspect something.”

Zhan obediently placed a tray on his laps, dragged a soup bowl closer and said suddenly even shyly:

“You need to know something else, Wang Yibo. One important thing, before saying that you won’t give up on me.”

Xiao Zhan blushed but that was more out of nervousness than shame. Yibo’s stomach twisted with a bad feeling:

“What else?”

“I swear, it’s my last secret,” said Zhan, and Yibo noticed a shadow of some old fear in his eyes. “ And I swear I wanted to tell you this even then, in the barn, but you ran away faster...”

Yibo sat heavily on the bed next to Zhan. He wasn’t sure if he could endure another terrifying detail of his biography or not. Finally he sighed and said heavily:

“Well, let’s go. I’m all ears.”

And then suddenly they heard someone called: “Brother William! Good afternoon!”

They twitched, turned to the door and then looked at each other again.

“Brother Victor, good afternoon!” a polite answer.

Zhan leaned forward, to Yibo, to his ear and whispered fast, choking on, hurrying to say:

“I killed John’s wife.”

The moment of a white noise in his head while Yibo tried to realize what he’d heard. They already clearly heard William’s steps, approaching the medical post.

“What?” Yibo asked stupidly.

“I killed John’s wife,” Xiao Zhan repeated clearly and then sharply recoiled, sticking into his tray, and the medical post’s door opened.

“Hell, I knew that you’re just goofing around here!” William roared from the threshold, entering. “Brother Zhan, are you indulging this? Is he bothering you with conversations?”

“No, even vice versa!” Xiao Zhan lifted his face from the meal and smiled politely, cutely, changing instantly and that made Yibo fall into stupor even more. “It’s me who’s bothering him. I questioned him about the impressions from the last concert.”

“Hey, you, get to work! Why are you sitting here?” William roared at him and Yibo got up from his place, feeling lost, looking at Zhan with shock. “The floors aren’t even washed, I can see it with a bare eye! Did you forget what a rag looks like?”

Xiao Zhan finished his meal, William went on grumbling, something really made him upset today:

“Of course he liked your concert. Why do you even need to ask these laborers? You invited them and thanks for that. They could have just stayed in their barracks. All these Yixuan’s innovations, sure... it seems to me they won’t do any good. He just discourages them!”

Yibo went on to cleaning the floor but the last words of Xiao Zhan didn’t give him rest. What did he mean? What the hell was going on?!

William sat in the corner and just gave Yibo commands:

“Wash in that corner too, stop loafing. Get under the bed with your hand, let’s go, you’re not a baby...”

Having understood that the man wouldn’t go and they wouldn’t get another opportunity to stay alone, at least today, Xiao Zhan got up, stretched and said to William:

“I’ve had a good rest today. Seung Yeon has a quite special atmosphere here. But... I should go. Have a nice evening, Brother William. Bye, Wang Yibo.”

William nodded at him and Yibo just turned to him confusedly but he couldn’t already understand anything in Xiao Zhan’s sight.

And it wasn’t clear when he was going to get answers to his questions.

Chapter Text

Yibo really tried to imagine how Zhan killed a woman: here he comes and stabs her or treacherously sprinkles her food with some poison, or pushes her down into some canyon or pushes her off from the mountain range that Chihuahuan Desert was full of. But all of those sucked in the end. Zhan’s image in his head contrasted so much with an image of a cold-blooded killer. He had seen Xiao Zhan in different states, after all: furious, nervous, bold. He just couldn’t believe that Zhan was a killer. If a murder had really had a place to be then it hadn’t definitely been intentional. Maybe Zhan had dropped a brick at the building site and Mrs. Cole had been passing by right at that time? That could have happened. Or, maybe, he’d sung some false note and she’d died out of disgust?

Yibo laughed involuntarily so that other people at the dining table paid attention to him. That was Wednesday, laborers had lunch after the morning work on errands. This time Yibo’d cleaned the warehouse and even saw his own backpack sideways, that he’d come to the community with, among the rest that were kept there.

“Why are you laughing, Yibo?” Ron asked.

But the guy barely managed to answer when the speakers at the poles came alive and a voice of the announcer waved through the settlement:

“Brothers and Sisters! We already know the joyous news: Brother Romeo and Sister Miyami are engaged with the blessing of John! The official celebration of the engagement is taking place this Sunday, at Hatsumoto Miyami’s house. All those who wish can make a visit and congratulate future spouses, they also accept presents. And, in relation to this happy news, John and The Committee of Confidants announce an unscheduled colloquium for laborers, we are ready to get into our ranks a new Brother. You can learn the exact date of holding a colloquium from your mentors.”

The whole dining area instantly buzzed. But laborers seemed to not really get surprised by this news, unlike Yibo and Ron. Probably, the old ones understood that recruitment would take place at the moment when John allowed Romeo and Juliette to get married. Only the new ones didn’t get it – Yibo and Ron.

“What is the reason for this unscheduled recruitment?” Yibo specified from his lads.

“Romeo was a usual Brother, not a Confidant,” Morris explained. “That’s why Hatsumoto’s father didn’t want them to marry. But now, of course, when the newlyweds move into the new house, Brother Romeo’s bunk in the Male Block will become free.”

“So is it just about sleeping places?” Yibo got excited.

“Of course not,” Sung Joo interrupted the laborer. “Sometimes you can squeeze up if the Committee needs it.”

“And how often do they conduct these unscheduled recruitment into the Brotherhood?”

“Once in half a year,” Fred said quietly.

“Freddie, here is definitely your time,” Santiago supported him. “This time you’ll definitely become a Brother!”

“Will I?” he responded and gave Yibo a short glance. “I doubt.”

“Hey, hush!” William approached their table. “You’re talking too much!”

Yibo and Sung Joo came back to the warehouse after lunch. Sung Joo was active and joyful, couldn’t stop talking, telling another story from his childhood:

“...once I even captured a radio room!”

“What did you capture?” Yibo got distracted from his own thoughts.

“Well, the radio room, whence they make announces!” Sung Joo smiled. “When I was thirteen. I deceived poor old Blind Jacque, locked inside, blocked the door with a chair and turned on the mic and started to tell some nonsense.”

“You what?!” Yibo got excited, laughing. “How did you handle the system?”

“That was an old one, quite simple. I pushed some buttons randomly and then I see – one of the lamps turned on, they heard me. And here we go.”

Yibo just shaked his head and laughed: oh, Sung Joo!

“And what did you say?”

“Oh, was talking some rubbish!” he couldn’t stop laughing. “Teased the guys, blurted out some other people’s secrets... well, I had pretty much after that.”

“How were you punished?” Yibo asked, getting serious.

“With rods,” he shrugged, as if that had been an ordinary case. “I still have some scars. Especially on my butt.”

Then Yixuan came to Yibo in the evening.

“Have you heard the morning announcement about the recruitment?” asked his young mentor.

“I have, I just wanted to talk to you about it,” Yibo perked up. “How is this exam, colloquium... don’t know how to say... conducted?”

“Both names are alright,” Yixuan answered. “Approximately as it was the previous time: you will just stay in front of the Committee and will talk to them. But, of course, you should also gain the support of your mentor. If your mentor doesn’t think you’re ready then you won’t be allowed to test.”

Yibo soulfully looked at Yixuan:

“Yixuan, will you... will you vouch for me this time? Will you support me? Will you let me take part in the colloquium?”

Yixuan sighed, looked at Yibo:

“Of course, we’re hurrying but not so much... Why, Yibo? To be honest, I think that now you’re not really ready. You’re still too raw, too little time has passed since your arrival at the community. Usually laborers are to be examined for becoming a Brother not earlier than in three months after they became laborers. And you’ve been a laborer just for... a month?”

“Now a little more.”

“That’s still too little term. It... it’ll look bold from our side, you see?”

Yibo dejectedly fell silent. So, that’s what it is? It meant, they wouldn’t even give him a chance? He suddenly thought about Fred. Was he refused like that all the time? Yixuan asked as if he’d guessed his thoughts:

“Which seems more fair to you: that they accept you as a Brother or, for example, Fred, who’s been waiting for it much longer?”

Yibo pursed his lips:

“It seems fair to me to give us both a chance to show ourselves.”

Yixuan chuckled:

“I’ll think about it.”

“Yixuan, I wanted to ask you about something else...”

The man expectantly raised eyebrows:

“Um... shall we play checkers?” Like the last time?” the guy asked, smiling innocently.

The mentor laughed:

“Yibo, if you want to talk to me openly and want me to answer some of your questions sincerely then you can just ask. You don’t have to fish out the truth from me on the right of the winner.”

Yibo chuckled. They sat at the library again. The guys often came there when they were talking, there it was quiet, cozy and quite fresh.

“Ok, then... I wanted to ask you about John. In fact, not really about him but about his wife. Deceased wife.”

“Mary Cole?” Yixuan listened to him attentively and was fully calm. “What do you want to know?”

“Just, you see... I’ve heard some talks in the community, you know, some snatches – here and there, and something doesn’t make sense.”

“Does it bother you?” Yixuan understandingly nodded. “Ask. I’ll clarify everything.”

It was difficult to be delicate and curious at the same time, but Yibo asked carefully:

“Do I get it right that Mary Cole died not so long ago...”

“Six years ago,” he answered simply.

“But I thought...” Yibo got shy, his ears went burning, “That John married again after the death of his wife and you were already born after that and it turned out...”

“Yes, Yibo,” Yixuan smiled politely, “I’m his illegitimate child.”

Yibo was embarrassed with such openness of Yixuan, felt he crossed the private territory but it was important for him to know:

“But you told me that you came to the community when you were still a child...”

“That’s true,” Yixuan threw a leg over the other. “I was eight or nine, when my father took us to the States. I was born and grew up in China, in the city of Shenzhou.”

He pronounced the name of his city like a real Chinese, almost without any accent, Yibo was stunned. But, of course, the guy now had even more questions and Yixuan saw that. He sighed shortly and started his clarifying story:

“My father met my mother while he was traveling across Asia, that was around the end of 80s and the beginning of 90s. The ranch had already existed but, of course, there weren’t such scales as now. When I was a child I knew that my father lived in far away America, that he was a foreigner. I saw him first in early childhood, when I was six or seven... He came to China for the second time, visited Tibet. My mother and I set off on a really long journey to meet him. Maybe, only then he found out about my existence. Of course, father made an unforgettable first impression on me. Then he took us here. And I found out that John had another family, that his older son Jack had recently died. Found out that I had a brother. And Mary... Mary was alive, she was still John’s wife, his right hand, the Mother of the Community, a founder and a director of the choir Nightingales.”

Still seeing Yibo’s stunned and bewildered face expression, Yixuan chuckled shortly and went on:

“Sure, that was a really dubious and sensitive situation. They started to raise me as a future Crownprince, as you call it, and more, I myself and my mom were a living proof of father’s unfaithfulness. And all of that in front of the eyes of Mary Cole... I think it was really difficult for her to accept it, moreover, that she had recently lost her only son. In general, Mary didn’t like us. My mother and I lived separately from them, in another house. That was an exception to the rules. And it happened that my father lived in two houses.”

“How did people in the community react?” Yibo asked.

“Nobody blamed my father,” Yixuan shrugged. “They had high hopes for me, felt sorry for Mary, looked at my mother with aversion... though my father was as guilty as her. But my mom is a strong woman. It didn’t break her. However, they didn’t fight or compete with each other. It’s important for you to understand. They endured each other, yes, but they never had any quarrel, didn’t arrange scandals... Father... father educated them.”

Yibo gave a hum: well, if there was one thing John knew how to do, it was to shape people for himself. What competition could even be there? Yibo was somehow sure that neither his first wife or a second one didn’t suffer from John’s love affairs. He had a passion much stronger.

“And how did Mary die?” Yibo asked his main question. “What did she die of?”

“She committed a suicide,” he just said. “She hung herself in the living room, as far as I know. In the Main House, where my father has always lived and is living now. My mother and I were ordered to move there right after her death.”

Yibo just opened his mouth after all the fearful news. He breathed out:

“Yixuan, and you... didn’t it scare you?”

It was almost written on his face: did I have a choice?

He shrugged again, a little bit nervously, rubbed his nose:

“After my father's death I will still inherit the house. I’ll have to live there. And now I can move out only if I marry someone. But I’m not ready yet. So... I have to live how I live. But sometimes...” Yixuan lowered his voice, “I swear, sometimes something screeches beneath.”

Some eerie silence formed between them, so that Yibo had goosebumps all over his arms.

“Why did she kill herself, do you all know?” Yibo asked quietly.

“I won’t hide it from you, Yibo, most people blame my mother,” he said. “But that’s just a slander. Mary and her had already lived near each other for a long time, more than ten years shoulder by shoulder by that moment. They didn’t have any conflicts, as I said. And then Mary just hangs herself... I think my mother has nothing to do with it. It seems to me, Mary had... Mary had some kind of a mental disorder.”

Yibo was listening, holding his breath, and Yixuan was talking, having intimately lowered his voice to a semi-whisper. Maybe he had no one to discuss it with, it was obvious that he wanted to share:

“She had always been nervous, repressed, whiny... We explained it by the fact her son had died. People often change after such tragic events. But the last years before her suicide her condition had gone even worse. Everyone noticed that. Maybe she had hysteria or neuroses... I barely understand it. But I think that led to the fact she’d decided to make such a horrible step. Of course, she’d left no note or message.”

Yibo’s hair stood on end out of what Yixuan was telling him. He was stunned:

“Why are you so open with me?”

“Because I want you to always be open with me too,” his mentor smiled at him.
Surely, he had to think thoroughly over this story.

On Thursday Yixuan unexpectedly came to Yibo again, though they hadn’t agreed on it. He distracted him from his work (Yibo was cleaning the street roads and removing small debris), took the guy under the elbow and dragged him aside. Yibo looked at his mentor intrigued:

“I thought,” Yixuan said with a smile, “and decided that I wouldn’t obstacle you if you wanted to take part in the recruitment to Brotherhood.”

Yibo’s eyes went wide:

“Yixuan... Thank you! But... why?”

Yixuan put his hands in pockets of his trousers, shrugged:

“I thought, who am I to argue with the will of Fate or with the Committee of Confidants? For real, it’s a huge coincidence that we both want your early entry into Brotherhood and the occasion will be given already in a month. It’s a huge coincidence that you built a house that became a reason for this chance that we both were waiting for. You’re learning to be a Brother just like I’m learning to be a Mentor. So why don’t we try it together, Yibo, why not? If you’re not ready the Committee will see it and won’t let you further. If the Committee decides that you are ready to join the Brotherhood so who am I to argue with them? It will be a lesson for you and me both. Honestly, Yibo, I’m not holding much hope. But, whatever the outcome is, it will still be an experience that will benefit us.”

Wang Yibo happily shaked his hand. Yixuan came to him again in the evening and they discussed the coming colloquium a lot and for a long time, the questions they could possibly ask Yibo, how to behave in front of the Committee and to give information and your thoughts.

In the evening of the same day Fred asked him:

“Has Yixuan allowed you to take colloquium? Will he vouch for you?”

“He will,” Yibo just answered. “And were you allowed?”

Fred didn’t say anything, just pressed his lips together.

Next day Yibo was intensively preparing after work: studied John’s works, especially marking those moments that Yixuan had told him to pay attention to, even wrote a synopsis for himself (he’d been given a notebook and a pen at the warehouse for the occasion).

He’d managed to call his mother before that and had understood with relief that she seemingly started to resign herself with her son’s absence and his rare calls.
The woman quickly and briefly told him the latest news, Yibo made up some fantasies for her about penguins that they dressed in colorful sweaters (still the documentaries from National Geographic didn’t pass without a trace). The conversation was very reserved, his mother left most of her emotions just for herself and Yibo was really grateful for her.

And in the evening, shortly before the bedtime hour, Fred suddenly approached Yibo and asked:

“Give up the colloquium.”

Yibo was getting ready to go to sleep: had worn his pajamas, had put his dirty clothes into the common busket for female laborers to take it away at dawn. Fred’s request surprised him a lot:

“Why should I?”

“You’re my main rival,” Fred said categorically. “I haven’t been allowed to colloquium for a year and this time my mentor vouched for me, I know, I will pass, just for all the years of service, because I deserved this right long ago, because I learned these books by heart!”

“Moreover, you see I’m not even a rival for you...”

“Drop the act!” Fred roughly broke him off. “You are the only rival for me here, just because you are a Princess’ Toy!”

Other laborers, attracted by their conversation, crowded around. The air seemed to thicken. Yibo pursed lips, responded reservedly:

“Sorry, Fred, I can’t refuse this opportunity. I also want to become a Brother and the earlier, the better. It’s also very important to me, believe me. It’s not about vanity, I have my own motives.”

Fred’s eyes squinted, slowly but surely he was filling with anger, he spat out words to him, hissing through his teeth with disdain:

“Hypocritical bastard.”

Yibo gathered himself. He was ready for the fact it all can end up with a fight, such an outcome wasn’t profitable either for Yibo or Fred though. Such an act could lead to the fact they would be banned from colloquium.

“Let’s go out,” Yibo offered him.

Fred lifted his chin:

“Wanna deal with me? One to one?” he clenched his huge fists.

“Lads, cut it out,” said Berthold. “It will lead to nothing but problems.”

“Really, Fred, you’re a prefect!” others supported him. “Just go to sleep. Let the Committee decide who will become a Brother!”

“He challenged me first!” Fred poked his finger at Yibo.

“I’m not going to fight with you!” he clarified. “I just wanted to talk. It’s not meant to be public.”

Fred’s face twitched with restrained aggression but he still said through his teeth:

“Okay. Let’s go.”

And, pushing the laborers, went outside first. Yibo made his way after him. The rest of the men followed them but didn’t go further than the main staircase, having stayed to watch the incident from the side view. No one wanted to get into trouble.

Having gone to the reasonable distance from his comrades, Fred put hands on his sides:

“Well, tell me whatever you wanted to tell me. If it’s some super-reason why exactly you should join the Brotherhood then I’ll tell you right now: go to hell. For each of your reasons I can find my own. I’ve been coming to it for more than two years, god damn!”

“No, I wasn’t going to talk about myself,” Yibo was calm and collected. Fred’s curses didn’t touch anything within his soul because he understood the reason for his anger. “But about you. Yixuan made me swear I wouldn’t tell anyone, but I’ll break my rule. I think you have the right to know.”

Fred broke off and fell silent, glowing with his black eyes.”

“Talk,” it sounded already much calmer.

“They’re afraid of you, Fred,” Wang Yibo said simply. “They know about your past so they are dragging on with your becoming a Brother because of it. Someone in the Committee is against you, they press on John, press on your mentor. That’s the reason. Not me. If they refuse you again this time, it's not because of me.”

Fred’s jaw muscles stood out, his sight was suspicious, his fists clenched:

“What do they know exactly?”

“I have no idea,” Yibo said. “And, honestly, I don’t care. Don’t care about your past. I’m not a hypocrite. I’ve talked to Yixuan, as I promised, and I didn’t lie when I told you I think you’re worthy. But I won’t back down, Fred, I’m sorry. I want to be a Brother too.”

He was angry, but had nowhere to put his wrath. The man understood that all unfortunate events had played against him even before the appearance of Wang Yibo in the community.

“Stay away from me,” he threw that at him and went back to the house.

“Don’t get upset, Fred!” Rom tried to support him. “I haven’t even been allowed to the colloquium. And you will still fight!”

“They will never allow you, idiot!” the man roared at him. “Do you think you'll be able to become a Brother?”

“Fred, what are you saying?” laborers hissed at him, when he came in the room first.

Of course, Ron wasn’t happy to hear something like that.

“Don’t pay attention to him,” Yibo told him, coming closer. “That’s just out of anger...”

“I’m not offended,” Ron shaked his head in the panama hat that he seemed to never take off. “I’ve not been here for long! I didn’t even hope they would let me take the exam.”

“Why didn’t you hope, Ron? You and I came here at the same time,” Yibo felt some kind of guilt stinging him. Damn, it seemed that Yixuan had told him about something like that. He didn’t really deserve it, he was a newcomer here. His every comrade deserved that right to join the Brotherhood but not him. Not yet.

“Oh, Yibo, I’m not you!” Ron smiled. “You’re so talented, quick-witted and smart! And I have a completely different way.”

Saturday was announced as a day-off. Laborers were told to prepare for the exam and the exam itself was scheduled on Monday. Xiao Zhan and him didn’t meet that week anymore. There was an engagement party of Romeo and Miyami in the Family Block on Sunday. The noise of the celebration was heard even at the house of laborers. Yibo was sitting on the steps outside and listening to that common buzz, trying to hear the voice of Xiao Zhan. But he wasn’t able to hear literally anything.

Yibo didn’t know whether he would be able to become a Brother or not. He knew just that he would hold his chance and wouldn’t let it go, he knew he was going to do his best. He sympathized with lads, especially Fred, yes he felt he was an upstart, and the guy constantly reminded himself that he had his job, his goal, mission, if you wish. It had already gone far beyond his personal feelings for Xiao Zhan. His job was even more important than his guilt, his goal was more important than the feeling of comradeship, his mission was more important than Fred, Xiao Zhan or him. Only would it work out. Only would all of that work out.

Chapter Text

Colloquium was going to drag on the whole day: twenty people from laborers, among them Ron was the only one who hadn’t been let to the exam.

Even William tried to dress up for the occasion, he was also related to laborers and their success, after all.

And what about the laborers themselves: they all were in their “dress” shirts, ironed, washed and cleaned, they hadn’t slept well at night, though each of them pretended they’d had a good sleep. They ate without an appetite, kept little volumes of John’s works on their laps so that they could remember something else at least, almost didn’t talk to each other and each of them and always remembered that the only one will be chosen. A very tough contest.

Yibo felt somehow more pressure from the side of other laborers on that day: he was privileged, special, the Princess’ Toy. The guy didn’t feel chosen on usual days, but here all men stood him out by themselves with their glances, intonations, with each movement. That felt... unpleasant.

But Yibo didn’t care about the social attitude towards himself. It was even good that he had a goal. A lot of things became so unimportant…

Only Ron and Sung Joo didn’t worry, though the last one was scheduled for a Disciplinary Hearing on the same day. Ron tried to encourage each one, to help each person, even Fred with his roars couldn’t push him away.

The Committee of Confidants had a seat in the Assembly Hall. Tables, covered with green fabric, were placed on the stage, there were chairs near, and the only chair for the examinee was placed in the aisle between benches. Every laborer was with their mentor: some of them worried, some of them didn’t. Yixuan worried badly. That was seen by his hands that he didn’t know where to put, by his continuous, slightly twitching smile, by his lips that he bit all the time. Though he tried to look calm and encouraged Yibo. Yixuan came for his ward and accompanied him to the Assembly Hall by himself. They were the seventeenth in the queue. The mentor talked to other Brothers, shook hands with some of them, but stayed with Yibo, not going far from him.

The guy was really grateful to Yixuan for his support. He also worried, he didn’t want to lose this perfect chance and more... he didn’t want to let Yixuan down. Then Yibo understood that he took a liking to him. When did it manage to happen? During their sincere talks or even earlier? He saw that Yixuan was open to him as much as he could, that he really cared about him. And knowing that Yibo would let him down, sooner or later, he felt some bitter guilt in advance somewhere deep inside him.

Morris was in front of them, he was at the Committee not for long: five minutes, not more. His mentor and him went out a little bit upset.

Finally, Yibo and Yixuan came inside.

The members of the Committee of Confidants were sitting at the table: nine people, eight men, representatives of various families, and one woman, Yixuan’s mother, Zhou Lianzin. Besides her Yibo knew only Victor and Xiao Zhan’s father among the Committee, two more were at his joining to laborers, the rest of them he had seen only on Labor Days and Sunday’s events but didn’t know them in person.

Under the dead silence Yibo and Yixuan went down the aisle, greeted the Committee, Yibo sat on the lonely chair in the aisle, Yixuan placed himself on the bench behind him. Really, like last time. This time there were just more people, and he even knew some of them, had managed to form some attitude towards them, so to speak. And Yibo also realized that Confidants looked at him not indifferently but with interest. Most likey, that was because of Yixuan, he himself had nothing to do with it.

Yixuan’s mother smiled, looking at her son, her sight beamed with pride. And Yibo felt even more that he didn’t want to let down his mentor, he imagined how much he was obviously worried at that moment.

“Hello, Yixuan and...” not yet familiar to Yibo Confidant looked at the list, “...and Wang Yibo. We’re glad you decided to talk to us. We’re especially glad that it’s your, Yixuan, first ward.”

Yibo glanced over his shoulder: the guy smiled politely, straightening his jacket.

“If you want, we can take a break before we start. We’re the seventeenth for today, probably you’re tired.”

The Committee smiled, Zhou Lianzin lowered her lashes, hiding her satisfied eyes. Her son did know how to talk to the Confidants right and could do it.

“Come on, they’re not tired!” they heard the voice from the side, and everyone who was in the Assembly Hall, jumped at their places. John was approaching them with a sweeping free walk from the main entrance, smiling. “Don’t pity them, son, and don’t be too courteous otherwise they’ll get arrogant!”

Yibo’s heart sank, he sharply turned away from John, who was coming to them, clutching to his chair with fingers. Damn, damn hell, he hadn’t expected John to be present…

But, judging by the faces of others, no one had actually expected. Yixuan went pale, all his made up idleness instantly went away, Zhou Lianzin pursed her lips tightly and her face darkened, the Committee got quiet, one of the Brothers commented:
“That’s right, we don’t need a break. In the end, we already had one three hours ago... Let’s continue, hm...”

John sat next to Yixuan, embracing his shoulders with his arm:

“Please, go on, yes. Pretend that I’m not here!”

That was easy to say. With John’s appearance everyone stiffened, and the air thickened. A strange reaction to the leader, Yibo thought everyone loved him, didn’t they?

What the hell is going on? Yibo thought, not willing even to turn to this man’s side. He was grateful to fate that there was no free chair at the table of the Confidants. If he had to look John in the eyes during the colloquium then he would definitely fail it. Damn... he had to learn to react calmly to John, otherwise he wouldn’t stay long with Brothers. Now the guy felt Cole with the back of his head and it wasn’t less worrying.

“Well... well...” the member of the Committee, who was conducting the interview, still couldn’t collect himself so more cold-blooded Victor took the initiative:

“Yibo, some members of the Committee, including me, have already talked to you earlier when they recruited you for laborers. And here we see you again, aspiring to join the Brotherhood. It has been just slightly more than a month, isn’t it too fast? Why did you decide that you are better than other laborers? Why should we choose you?”

Yibo sighed out: Yixuan and him had already discussed it. In no case should he answer this question directly. Collect, Yibo, think of it as an exam, or a job-interview. Although Yibo was a very young man and hadn’t had in general either job-interviews or exams, he still tried to abstract from the man, sitting behind him, who he hated, and to focus on what they had talked about with his mentor:

“I am definitely not better than other laborers,” he started, licking his lips. “I’ve dared to appear in front of the Committee today, just hoping I could help the society and to start bringing more benefits to the community.”

Victor gave a hum, holding back a slight smile. Yibo wasn’t a fool, everyone understood that, and Yixuan surely had worked on him with dedication. Zhou Lianzin digged through her papers and said, giving the laborer a polite smile:

“I have a report on you from William: he characterizes you as an inquisitive, curious person, keeps his own counsel, smart, quiet but at the same time patient and hardworking. Do you agree with his characteristics?

Yibo returned her a polite smile:

“William is really kind to me,” some light laughs among those present. “That’s true, I’m quiet. I’m not used to talking as much as Brother Sung Joo.”

Here everyone laughed kindly, Yibo decided to skip the notion “keeps his own counsel”, do not walk down the edge and instantly to go on to something good:

“I’m glad that Brother William marked me as a hardworking person. I like caring about the place where I live. I think it’s just a normal man’s duty, nothing special. I would like to make more effort if it’s possible, to work more for the community.”

John gave a hum behind his back and Yibo tried his hardest not to glance back. The leader was perfectly seen by the Committee of Confidants, and Yibo saw in their reactions and face expressions embarrassment, cautiousness, fear to say or do something wrong. Yibo perfectly understood that the only one he should be liked by was John. The Committee was just a group of puppets that thought something to themselves. They wouldn’t dare to speak even a peep without him. But why did John come right now? He was pretty indifferent to the activity of the Committee today and got curious exactly at him and decided to see how the colloquium was going.

Yixuan, he came here because of Yixuan, Yibo replayed that in his head, trying to calm down the nerves. He just came here to support his son.

Support? Was John capable of having such simple, warm feelings? Maybe he just wanted to sink his own heir? Yibo didn’t know well how they got on, and didn't know what he thought about Yixuan’s promotion. Relax, Yibo. It’s none of your business, don’t think about it. Focus on questions.

They went on asking him. They went through the guy’s little biography, addressed more specifically on the reasons of his coming to the community and why the guy eventually decided not to leave. Yibo had the whole speech here, he was talking soulfully and sincere, because he didn’t lie at any word:

“Of course, when I came to the community, I had no idea where I got. What information did I have? It was miserable, mixed with some of my own baseless fantasies. And just there my mission... or my Way, as you wish, opened to me. I understood that I got here to help people around me. To try and make their lives better. Because I’ve never met such amazing, wonderful, unusual people as here in my life. I’m sure that I would find a lot of friends among Brothers, I’m sure I’ll find my own happiness here. And I’m ready to do a lot for it. Challenge me, give the most difficult tasks, use my force, energy, eagerness to the benefit of the community, I would be only glad.”

When Yibo finished, John said quietly but still everyone could hear him:

“Hm, the guy is not bad...”

“Wang Yibo, your words are perfect themselves and are burning with life,” Zhou Lianzin smiled at him,” but it’s important for us that you understand the ground ideas and theses that the community lives with. What books have you read?”

They started to run him through the whole material that Yibo had been studying all those weeks. It was a little bit awkward to talk about John’s book under the presence of the author, but the man didn’t say a word and was sitting quietly. Yibo tried to imagine that there wasn’t this man in the Assembly Hall.

Their conversation lasted long, they asked the laborer about literally everything for not less than half an hour, and it was seen on the Committee's faces that they were favorable towards the young man.

At the end one of the Confidants asked him:

“You’ve said a lot of right, kind words, Yibo. You’ve really often talked about the benefits that you want to bring to the community, that’s good. But, maybe, you have a plan of actions in your head? Are you referring to some concrete job?”

Damn, they hadn’t talked about it with Yixuan... Was it a tricky question? What should he answer? He fell silent for a moment and decided to say as he felt it:

“My wish to bring benefits doesn’t mean that I’m looking for an “easy” job. If the Committee decided that I’m more effective at the building site then I would stay there. And even joining the Brotherhood I would be glad to continue working with laborers, because they are also my Brothers,” here Yibo felt that was too pathetic and smiled shyly, going on. “But, speaking objectively, what can I do? I have working experience in the hardware store, with a cash register, a little accountancy and inventory control. It’s a low chance you need cash record keeping. Of course, I’d help Isaac at the warehouse, or, maybe,” here he took a deep breath and decided to take a risk, “for example, do some shopping for building materials and various stuff for everyday life.”

Yibo hadn’t thought about his answer before. He just knew that Xiao Zhan was put under lock and a key and wasn’t allowed to go anywhere, so the place was probably vacant. That was a bold announcement from him, he watched expectantly what would be the Committee's reaction to his words.

The Confidants were looking at one another, then Xiao Zhan’s father asked him:

“Why did you decide to offer this exactly?”

“I’d worked in the hardware store in Chaparral before coming here,” he shrugged, trying to keep neutral face expression and not trying to give away his worries. “I really know about building materials and, having worked at the building site under the direction of William and Fred, I’ve started to understand even more. And whoever is making purchases now... don’t want to say anything bad about the Brother, whoever it is, but... sometimes they didn’t bring what we needed. Corners were of the wrong size, they bought facing bricks instead of building ones, hollow ones instead of solid, well, you understand... The paint could be vary in color, wood in density... all of those affect the solidity of the house...” he pretended as he broke himself off, smiled. “I think, I could do better shopping. I have a trained eye. I even have a driving license, can even bring all of that from the town, if you want.”

Yibo fell silent and expectantly looked at the Committee. They were sitting with thoughtful, confused, doubting, suspicious face expressions.

“Yibo...” Victor dragged, fishing out a fresh toothpick from the pocket of his trousers. There was a pile of nibbled ones on a tissue in front of him, “I heard you have parents in Chaparral... I heard, you’re really attached to them... It means, you want to go beyond the perimeter and go to Chaparral, to buy building materials at your former place of work, the shop, right?”

Son of a bitch, stinky goat, Yibo thought with anger. That was such a bad, filthy move from the side of the man, he tried to compromise him, to “expose” him, misusing his attachments. But Victor, dear, you don’t know about my biggest weaknesses so just shut up.

“Unfortunately, because my decision to go to the community was spontaneous, I wasn’t able to make my parents ready for the fact I would disappear from their life,” Yibo said carefully. “So I have to reasonably keep in touch with them so they... wouldn’t start taking some measures, do you see? I terribly don’t want to lie to my mother and live in lies but now, unfortunately, I can’t do without it. Now she is sure that I’m... on an expedition with Greenpeace in Antarctica, saving penguins from the oil slick...”

The Committee of Confidants couldn’t endure, people burst laughing, each differently: someone surprised, someone joyfully, someone chuckled, like Victor. And Yibo said finally:

“So, vice versa, I wouldn’t really want to go to Chaparral and to risk that she or someone else I know can notice me. I heard they have a hardware store in Anthony, not to mention El Paso and Las Cruces.”

The Committee spoke to one another for some more time, and finally Zhou Lianzin said:

“Yibo, thank you for the interesting conversation. You’ll find out the results of the colloquium with everybody, today in the evening, before the dinner.”

Yibo nodded and stood up from his place. It seemed to him he’d run a distance at a marathon, he was so exhausted.

“Good job, son, you did great,” John’s voice occurred unexpectedly. It seemed, Yibo had really managed to forget about his presence, and he’d been sitting there quietly for not less than thirty minutes. John even slapped Yixuan’s shoulder, he weakly smiled at his father and stood up after Yibo. Both guys nodded at the Committee and went away.

John stayed and gave the Confidants an unsatisfied glance:

“You’ve dragged this chatter too much.”

“John, we... we just wanted to do everything right...” one of them started to excuse weakly. “Conscientiously, as you taught us...”

“It was already clear for me after fifteen minutes that boy fits,” John interrupted carelessly. “What? Haven’t you learned to see through people?”

“We want to be sure of our decision,” Zhou Lianzin stood up for the Brother. “Because it has to do not only with a new member of the Brotherhood but also with our son...”

“Yixuan did a great job,” John stood up. “I’m proud of him. He is a good guy. I think you also know what decision to make.”

John went to the exit but, having made several steps, glanced back and said to his wife as if nothing:

“Oh, sure, sweetheart... make me your signature Peking Duck today, and take on that underwear that I’ve presented you with. Will celebrate a new stage in the life of our son.”

“Yes, John,” she squeezed from herself humbly, lowering her eyes, and John, proud, left the Assembly Hall.

When Yibo and Yixuan went out of the Assembly Hall, first the mentor loosened his tie at the neck with annoyance, exhaling. Yibo looked at the rest of the people: Santiago, Fred and Sung Joo were still waiting for their turn, all with their mentors (Sung Joo’s mentor was his father).

The fact that Yibo and Yixuan were kept long at the colloquium spoke for itself. Fred casted hateful sights at him. Only Sung Joo smiled at him and waved a hand as if saying “see you”.

“Let’s go over there,” Yixuan said to him and went in the direction of the communal dining. The guy looked really upset. “I want to drink, I just can’t, or I’ll die... I need a glass of water...”

It was always possible to take boiled water in a big aluminum kettle at the dining entrance. Yixuan greedily had two glassed in a row, nodded at Yibo:

“Do you fancy?”

“Yes,” Yibo looked worriedly at his mentor. “You look angry. Am I guilty? Have I said anything wrong?”

Yixuan stretched a glass of water to him and exhaled once again, trying to calm down. Frowning, he said:

“That’s because of the father. Why has he come today? He wasn’t supposed to be there.”

Yibo drank the half, wiping lips with the back of his hand:

“He came to support you, didn’t he?”

“To support?” the irony was heard in Yixuan’s voice. “He came to show, that I wouldn’t do it without him, that I’m nobody without his patronage.” Yixuan quickly glanced at Yibo and broke himself off, covering eyes with a hand. “Sorry, it shouldn’t have affected you. Forget what I said.”

“Come on,” Yibo just said and finished his glass. “Who said that to be the Crownprince is easy and enjoyable?”

“It also makes me angry because I know I could have done it myself!” Yixuan couldn’t restrain himself. “You were amazing and I’d predicted most of their questions. And how well you got away with Chaparral, nice job, Yibo!”

Yibo smiled at him and said calmly:

“It’s over, we’ve done all that we could. Now it’s up to the Committee, Yixuan. Let them decide.”

“I’m afraid the decision is obvious,” he pursed lips. “Father has shown his support, didn’t stay neutrally at the side. They won’t go against him. Most likely, you’ll become a Brother, Yibo.”

His heart twitched in a joyful premonition but the guy held himself back.
“Isn’t it what we wanted?”

“I didn’t want it like that,” the mentor responded but still smiled.

Finally, this long day was over. The Committee talked to everyone, kept even the Disciplinary Hearing with Sung Joo and left for negotiations. In fact, it didn’t last long. Here, an hour before the dinner it was announced through speakers that Wang Yibo was chosen as a new Brother.

At that time he was with other laborers, changing into his casual clothes. He had been almost sure that they would choose him but still smiled happily and with a huge relief. Still, he did it. He did it, Yixuan and him did it…

But the flow of his joyful thoughts was cut with a sound of broken glass: Fred smashed the mirror in the restroom out of anger.

“Fred, damn hell, that was our only mirror!” Berthold shouted at him and the men went out to the common room, burning with wrath.

At that exact moment Yibo was putting his shoes, slouching on the lower bed of Ron. The prefect was looking at him with furious, angry eyes, clenching his fists:

“You, a chiseling bitch, I knew it would end up like that!”

Yibo slowly straightened. Well, it would definitely be a fight. He wondered, what if he decided to answer Fred, would they cancel his joining to the Brotherhood? Maybe he should let Fred punch him? Or should he try to calm him down with words?

“Fred, you know I’m not guilty of anything...”

“Aren’t you?” he roared and came up to him. Other men buzzed, trying to stop him. “He’s been here for two seconds and instantly squeezed into Brotherhood, men, are you ok with it?!”

“Calm, Fred! Do you want them to not let you to the next colloquium? You’ll just get more troubles, Fred, you, not him!”

All men gathered around the prefect, and only Sung Joo and Ron stayed with Yibo. Sung Joo looked tensely at the laborers, Ron – with fear, but at that moment Yibo felt the clear border that laid between him and them. He wasn’t a laborer now, he broke away, separated in a second. Now he was Brother Yibo though he didn’t yet have the official initiation. But all of them felt it. Only Ron didn’t feel it, because he cared about all residents of the community equally. And though he was really afraid, he still covered Yibo with himself, not because he became a Brother, but because he was still his best friend.

“You understand that’s not because I’m a genius but because I got Yixuan as my mentor!” Yibo yelled, he was bursting. Looked at the depressed faces of the laborers and shouted angrily at them, “Who is still an idiot and doesn’t get it?!”

Everyone fell silent. Ron glanced back at him:

“Yibo... don’t say it.”

“I’m sick of it!” he roared angrily. “I’m sick of feeling guilty of something I don’t have my guilt of!”

“What’s going on here?” William was at the doorway.

The common tension sharply fell at the sight of him. Everyone understood that Fred wouldn’t throw himself at Yibo in front of William. The man heavily stepped into the room, putting hands on his sides:

“Scatter into the corners, sons of a bitch, and don’t let me hear you!”

Laborers stepped aside. Only Fred stayed at his place, looking at William intently.

“Is there any justice in this world?!”

“No!” he roared at him in response, and Yibo saw how the fire of courage went down in the prefect's eyes, turning into absolute disappointment. “Maybe once you’ll get it, and then will become a Brother.”

Fred was silent. Then William turned to Yibo and Sung Joo and said to them:

“Quick, collect your belongings, roll the mattresses. Sung Joo, you’ll come back home. Yibo, you must move to the house of Brothers till dinner. You’ll settle down at the new place right in the evening.”

Not asking him about anything, the guys went to their beds and hurriedly started to collect their belongings. It took Yibo five minutes. That’s comfortable when you almost don’t have any private things. William gave them two paper bags where they put their stuff, and both followed him, carrying mattresses.

Ron was the only one to go see him off:

“I’ll come to you soon, Yibo! We’ll become neighbors and will sleep near each other, as earlier, you’ll see!”

And suddenly Wang Yibo wanted to cry. He didn’t understand what was going on with him. As if all emotions of the day entwined into a single tangle, pressed on him, trying to get free. He glanced back at Ron and told him:

“Don’t get bored without me, alright?”

“Of course, Yibo! I’ll thoroughly get ready for the next colloquium!”

“Do you promise me that if Fred or the others will hurt you so you’ll let me know?”

“They won’t,” Ron smiled. “We’re like a family here!”

“Ron!”

“Go in peace, Brother Yibo!”

“Ron, you’re still my best friend.”

The man just smiled and lowered his panama hat, hiding his moist eyes.

William called Yibo and the guy hurriedly followed him, carrying the roll of mattress and the bag with belongings tighter.

He was just moving to the neighboring house, nothing special. He achieved what he’d been striving to for a month and a half. But why then was it so piercingly sad at his heart?

Chapter Text

William came into one of the blue little houses that were standing in the orderly row one after another. These houses were no different from the house of laborers except for three important features: First, the Houses of Brothers were for not more than six persons. Second, their renovation and accommodations were much better than those at the house of laborers. Third, there was an own shower room, adjoined each house of Brothers, with three enclosures that were possible to lock.

Yibo appreciated all those three advantages right at the moment he put his mattress on the empty bed on the edge. They were alone with William in the house.

“And where is everybody?”

“Everyone’s at their work,” he shrugged. “They’ll get together at dinner time, and after that you’ll already get to know everybody.”

William himself sat on one of the beds, and Yibo surprisingly found out that he was his housemate. Well... Yibo knew that William wasn’t a Familial but to see him like that in the relaxed surroundings was, so to speak, really unusual. While the man was satisfyingly sighing, lying on his bed and stretching legs, Yibo unfolded his mattress and put his belongings into his own (!!) bedside table. He examined the room and, of course, compared with the barracks for laborers the house of Brothers seemed to him a luxury five-star hotel. Then William also told him that his clothes would be changed for the newer ones, and, depending on what job he would be told to do, he would be able to have other private belongings such as: stationery, a watch and an alarm, books and something else. Such a clear and obvious social elevator was even a little comical. So on display: you became a Brother – now you can have a little more private space, a little more free time, slightly better clothes and a little more private things... On the other hand, that really encouraged to go further. What was Yibo supposed to do if he wanted further to go up the career ladder by leaps and bounds? Maybe he had to find himself a more or less suitable Sister and marry her.

“William, is there a chance to meet women only on the Labor Day and Sunday events?” he asked absent-mindedly, looking at the flower beds below the window.

William chuckled shortly:

“Not without a reason labores say you’re a womanizer. Have you starved of females? Or do you have a clear plan of actions, ha, Wang Yibo?”

“Maybe, both?” he smiled.

Then they heard a signal for dinner and sat off to the communal dining.

It turned out that Brothers could take any seat in the dining that they wanted, regardless of the house they lived in. That’s how they managed to talk and get to know each other. Of course, everyone had their favorite seat. Yibo even saw inscriptions on the oilcloth: “William”, “Isaac” – that’s how they marked a place for themselves and no one could sit there but the mentioned Brother. Others moved and placed themselves wherever they wanted or where they saw fit. Yibo noticed that men gathered mostly according to their age: older adults were sitting with other adults, and for young people that was more interesting with each other. He hadn’t paid attention to it earlier. Moreover, as far as he understood, even Familials and Confidants visited dining rather often when they couldn’t have a meal at home for some reason. They had tables cleaned for them with great enthusiasm and joy, they were offered to sit near and asked a lot of questions.

It was really strange to sit at the other tables, separately from laborers. He saw Ron, turning in his panama hat, who waved at him across the whole dining area. He saw other lads who he’d left just an hour ago. Yibo seemed an imposter to himself, who sneaked into this community through cheating, to these people, who’d taken a place that wasn’t his. Partly it was true. He looked at Fred's back, who didn’t turn to him and was eating calmly. Maybe, that wasn’t new for him to see how his former comrades-laborers became Brothers, sat at the other table and moved forward, and he remained at his place. Maybe that's why he ate with his back to the whole dining.

Brothers diet was also different: less meat (Yibo related that to that fact that Brother’s work required less effort and was not so hard as of laborers), but there were more vegetables, fruit, dairy products and they had a choice. For example, porridge sprinkled with pieces of fruit, or porridge with raisins, or with nuts. Not just a stewed-fruit drink, but he could also take tea, coffee, juice or even yogurt. White bread or croutons, sauces for the main dish. Actually, much more diversity. Yibo remembered when Xiao Zhan’d gotten lost out of a huge variety of choice when they came in KFC, and chuckled: he just got lost like that, not knowing what to choose for his main dish – fried potatoes or stewed vegetables? The dinner seemed royal-like to Yibo after the month of poor monotonous diet. But, probably, pleasants didn’t end there. Having heard that there was a newbie in their ranks, Brothers strived to get to know Yibo. They could hardly give him time to eat, came up to give a handshake, to share a couple of words: “Hey, I’ve seen you on the Labour Day, you worked well”, “Yes, I remember you, you helped with unloading trucks”, “Hello, Yibo, hope we’ll make friends”, “I’m glad you’re with us, Yibo”. The guy didn’t expect such a warm and welcoming hospitality from the people he barely knew.

“Give him some rest,” Isaac stood for the newbie. “Let him eat calmly.”

But here Brothers buzzed with more effort, because Xiao Zhan came into the dining: active, smiling and blushing. He instantly came up to Yibo, not being ashamed or afraid now. The guy’s heart was beating heavily out of worry, he wasn’t still used to the fact that Xiao Zhan and him could communicate just like that.

“Oh, even the Confidant made us a visit,” William chuckled not so far. “Wang Yibo, you’re really on demand.”

“Hello, Wang Yibo,” Xiao Zhan reached him and stretched a hand to the new Brother, looking Yibo in the eyes with a question whether he was going to accept him after the latest news Zhan had managed to get him at the medical post. “I heard, they’ve chosen you. Congratulations.”

Yibo, not without an inner thrill, shaked his narrow hand, trying to show with his eyes that everything remained the same between them.

“Thank you, brother Zhan. I’m glad too.”

“Do you mind if I sit near?” Zhan smiled wider and, not waiting for the answer, sneaked to the table, slinging his long legs over the bench. Brothers obligingly made room, Zhan squeezed between him and some other man. They were sitting, holding tight to each other, Wang Yibo instantly got hotter. He felt Zhan with his shoulder, an arm, a hip and a knee, if only his Didi stayed calm out of this unexpectant proximity…

“Brother Zhan, will you have dinner?” one of the Brothers asked helpfully, and the man nodded:

“Thanks, I’d appreciate that.”

“Do you know each other?” Isaac asked.

“Yes, we do,” Xiao Zhan smiled in his usual cute manner. “Brother Yibo helped with renovation at my house and decorations in the Assembly Hall for my birthday.”

They smiled at each other and after long weeks Yibo felt really happy. Zhan was brought dinner and they ate next to each other, and Yibo felt well just out of it. Zhan’s proximity swept away and washed off all his inner worries that had tormented his heart just two hours ago. His Way led to this man solely, he was moving towards him and had overcome everything in the sake of him. Now they could eat, sitting next to each other, touching each other, was that not enough?
They barely talked, just shared some meaningless phrases:

“When do you have initiation, Wang Yibo?”

“I think, on Wednesday. My mentor should tell me tomorrow.”

“Have you already decided what department you would like to work at?”

“Yes, we’ve discussed it with the Committee,” Yibo responded quietly, though he understood that everyone was still listening to him because he was a newbie. “I do understand building materials. Maybe my work is going to be related to it...”

Xiao Zhan caught his sight and nodded shortly as if “I got it”.

“Oh, my shoelaces seem to untie,” he mumbled and bowed, pulling up one knee, messed with shoes and Yibo felt as Zhan’s thin fingers put something into his shoe (of course, a note). Then the man straightened and smiled again at Yibo affectionately and brightly:

“Congratulations once again, Yibo. See you at your Initiation.”

He left the table first.

Having come back to the House of Brothers, Wang Yibo locked himself in the restroom, took out a piece of paper, rolled into a little tight tube:

“Thursday, 22:30, the hay barn.” Were they finally going to talk like humans?

Yibo flushed it down the toilet and then went to the shower. A separate shower cabin, Lord, what could he only wish for? No one hurried him up because of the time so that he had to do it faster, go-go... He could stay under the warm water jets, relax, close his eyes... Yibo remembered Xiao Zhan’s warmth instantly, his lips, his tongue in his mouth, the taste of his cock. He devotedly masturbated under the warm water jets and came quietly.

In the evening the guy met his other housemates. They were, besides William, the old man Isaac who worked at the warehouse, and three more Brothers who Yibo hadn’t conversed with before and hadn’t encountered. Arek, Silver and Menz. They welcomed him warmly, looked at him with curiosity, wanted to know more about him but also told about themselves. That’s how he found out that Arek, for example, had been from the Confidant’s family before and had lived in the detached house. His parents were among the first who’d come to the community. But they both died and Arek’s house had been given to others, and he himself became an ordinary Brother because he couldn’t have lived alone in the house. And Silver, for example, had gotten a house too, but his spouse died together with a child while giving birth and he had to come back to the house of Brothers. And Menz had come into the community with his sister and they’d separated them. He had managed to become a Brother already, had moved into the house of Brothers, and his sister still remained a laborer and he really worried about her. Not only did they barely see each other, but it was known that female laborers lived in much poorer conditions than male laborers.

Isaac had almost the same story. It turned out that he came to the sect together with his daughter after the death of his wife. They’d hoped to live together in the detached house as a family but they’d just separated them according to their gender. His daughter, Lia, lived at the Female Block, and he lived at the Male one and Isaac and his daughter could move to the detached house only in the case if she married one of the Brothers. Then newly weds could get the right to take the old-man to themselves.

“God willing, Lia will find a good man here,” the man smiled and looked at Yibo with hope. He felt really uneasy because of it. “I still hope to see grandchildren in my life.”

Finally, that crazy and long, really long day, full of various events and emotions was over. Yibo almost instantly fell asleep as a very tired person. As a matter of fact, it was true.

Even the march sound for waking up didn’t strike him so harshly, when Yibo got up the next day in the house of Brothers. Vice versa, he was in a great mood, slept well, and was active. Having chosen cereal instead of porridge for breakfast, he filled his plate with various condiments: nuts, dry fruits, and ate that so greedily and with great pleasure. Brothers laughed, looking at him:

“First of all everyone swings across food when they join Brothers, even get slightly overweight. But then it’s okay, you’ll get calmer.”

Yixuan came to him right after breakfast. He also warmly laughed at the satisfied face of Yibo and told him:

“Let’s go. I’ll conduct an excursion for you across the community.”

“Have I already managed to see all the blocks except the female one?” Yibo got confused. What else did he want to show him?

“You’ve been to those blocks as a laborer,” Yixuan winked at him, “and now you’ll go there as a rightful member of our community. Trust me, you’ll see it differently now.”

They slowly set off along the gravel paths, Yixuan was telling him:

“Every Brother is busy with their constant activity. Someone within the borders of the community, and someone – beyond it. As you already understood, the most dirty and heavy job is done by the laborers. Having become a Brother you’ll never get back to the building site, and won’t go to clean cowsheds only if it’s not for the Labor day. We have some free vacancies for males now. Usually newly converted Brothers are free to choose by themselves. Father claims that you should like the activity you devote your every day to. But unfortunately, it’s not always ideal at the end. Sometimes just a qualification, education of a new Brother can’t benefit the community anyhow.”

“Yeah, I got that. As if, for example, my cash register skills.”

“Yes. So we give the opportunity to study, to get some knowledge from a craftsman as our ancestors used to do – from hand to hand.”

“Sounds interesting.”

“Now we need hands for different vacancies. For example, our mechanic, Ivan, has been asking us about an apprentice. You have a driving license and drove a car beyond the perimeter, right? Do you understand auto mechanics?”

“Not so much, just on the surface.”

“We’ll still go first to the garage, I’ll introduce you to him,” and they went to the garage, met Ivan who was talking to them with a strong russian accent. The man showed them their wonder-autos assembled from some scraps, Yibo just whistled and got stunned, remembering impressions of Tommy-the-mechanic from Anthony. The garage was huge. There they could keep some agricultural tools, a couple of trucks, one small bus, several cars, mostly old pickups. As Yibo found out, all cars in the settlement were communal, keys were kept at Ivan and, to go beyond the perimeter you had to tell him in advance and to book a car, so to speak. He had his own graphics. It was like he rented cars and watched that all of them were back at the garage in the evening. Yibo liked Ivan but they still went further with Yixuan.

“Now we’re going to the warehouse to Isaac,” Yixuan told him. “He was really happy to know that you worked with a warehouse accountancy beyond the perimeter. He really needs a helper. They always send him someone from laborers but he’s been asking about the permanent helper. His eyesight is weak and it’s difficult for him to climb up the stepladder... And you still share the same house, it’s really comfortable.”

Yibo had already known everything in the warehouse, Yixuan and him came just purely formal, to check it in.

“So, what would you choose?” the mentor asked when, having greeted Isaac, they went out again.

“Should I already make my choice?” Yibo got confused.

“No. You have the right to make a decision till the end of the week. Your Initiation is tomorrow, and on Thursday and Friday you can work at the warehouse and at the garage. To decide.”

“Yixuan, do you remember I told you that I could do some shopping?” Yibo asked carefully.

Yixuan smiled:

“You’ve made a good offer, actually, Yibo. Just, you know, we let beyond the perimeter only those we can trust...”

“I see,” he responded quickly. “I’m really just a newbie, haven’t deserved the trust yet.”

“No, of course you deserve it,” Yixuan politely tried to sugarcoat his words. “Just let Brothers get used to you. They all will get to know you better, will see what a serious and hardworking guy you are...”

“Don’t overpraise me,” Yibo laughed. Yixuan laughed too. “It would be better if you told me what will be tomorrow during the Initiation? What do I have to get ready for?”

Yixuan’s eyes squinted slyly, he smiled:

“It’s the Sacrament of joining the Brotherhood, you know that, I can’t tell you.”

“But I still need to know something,” the guy shared his smile and the mentor grinned:

“Of course, you do. Well, for example, you’ll finally meet and talk to my father, as you wanted.”

Yibo’s face involuntary changed. Smile left his lips and his hands clenched in fists by themselves. Yixuan understood his reaction differently:

“Don’t worry so much. You’ll just talk in a relaxed atmosphere, not for long. Then the men from the community gather at one place and we will conduct a formal ceremony of Initiation, after that we’ll just sit together like men do, maybe will have some drink.”

“What?” Yibo was surprised. “We’re not supposed to have alcohol in the community!”

“We are when it’s a celebration,” his mentor winked at him and added but much quieter, ”...but it’s only for men.”

Yibo had never been a feminist. It hadn’t touched him therefore didn’t worry much. But here a fool would see that women’s rights were harassed. Did they have at least any rights here?

“Won’t there be any women at the Initiation?” Yibo asked.

Yixuan smiled, slapped his shoulder:

“You’ll have the opportunity to meet unmarried Sisters at the nearest dance party, we have them at weekends. Don’t worry, you won’t miss your chance.”

“I’d like to believe it,” Yibo mumbled in response. “So you wouldn’t tell who will be at the Initiation, right?”

“Yibo, do you trust me?”

The guy's heart sinked for some reason. He didn’t like that. He would like to trust Yixuan. Yixuan was a good guy. But he just couldn’t let himself do it.

“Of course, I do,” he answered eventually.

“Nice. Then just relax. Initiation is only a formal ceremony of transformation, nothing special. It won’t hurt you. It's harmless stuff.”

“Okay then,” he dragged hesitantly.

Yibo didn’t sleep well the whole night. He was oppressed by the feeling of uncertainty, and moreover, that he would have to talk with John face to face. He was really afraid that he wouldn’t restrain himself and would reveal himself somehow, would show him his hatred. What would they talk about? What was the goal of such conversations? Just a formal meeting or would John start probing him to find Yibo’s weak points?

The next day, on Wednesday, Yixuan came to Yibo right after breakfast, gave him several instructions:

“Now we’re going to my father, he’ll meet you at his study. You’ll talk for some time, I’ll wait for you downstairs. Just don’t worry, be yourself.”

But, of course, Yibo was nervous. His hands sweated when Yixuan and him approached a big white three-storey house. Some Sister in a white apron opened a door for them, and men went up to the highest floor where John had his perfectly soundproofed study. Yixuan knocked and they heard “Come in!” and Yibo came in, closing the door behind himself. The mentor just managed to encouragely smile at him finally.

John was sitting at his work desk and reading a newspaper. An ordinary one brought to him from Anthony by someone. He had thin glasses in black iron frame on his nose, he was wearing black trousers, domestic soft shoes, a white shirt with sleeves rolled up to the elbow. John’s hands were strong, firm, covered with light white hairs.

Yibo just thought for a moment would he have fallen for John if he’d met him when he was young? Maybe still not, solely because of the fact that he’d always fell for asian beauty. But Yibo could do nothing but admit that on those photos from the website John’d looked really hot. And now he still preserved some flair of former beauty and hadn’t really lost his charm and charisma.

John lifted his eyes on him and shone with a Hollywood smile:

“Hello, Yibo. Come in, have a seat.”

The guy took two steps, feeling an incredibly thick carpet under his feet. He didn’t even hear the sound of his own steps. John nodded at the deep high-backed chair for him, where Yibo almost sank the time he sat himself there. The man folded the newspaper with a light movement:

“Despite the fact we try to do without the benefits of civilization here we still need to know what’s going on in the world. Now they are having a gubernatorial election in New Mexico, it will surely have an impact on the life of the community, it’s worth being aware of.”

Yibo gulped. The man he hated with all of his heart was sitting near, just two meters away from him. It seemed John was fully relaxed. An image that Yibo would jump at John with one movement and twist his neck flashed through the guy’s mind. He licked lips and lowered his eyes. He felt uneasy. It was difficult to look at the man. It seemed to Yibo that John could see through him.

“Cheer up,” he said welcomingly. “How are you feeling?”

There was an endless fatherly love in his voice. Yibo even lifted his eyes again to make sure that it was really John.

“Ok,” but the guy’s voice instantly went husky. “Sorry. I’m a little worried.”

“I see it,” he said patronizingly, “William told me that the moment you came to the community you all the time required to see me. Why did you look for me then?”

Yibo quickly glanced at him one more time and casted his eyes down, licked lips:

“I thought I looked for you. But I didn’t look for you. I looked for my Way.”

John looked at him directly and slightly smiled at those words:

“And how’s your searching?”

“Great,” it seemed to Yibo that there was more iron in his words then it was supposed to be, he caught himself and added softer, “It seems I’ve started to move along my Way. But I’ve just made the first step.”

“Tell me what your mission is about,” John crossed legs, graciously and imposingly, Yibo felt he was at the appointment at the psychologist for a moment. Generally, that was true, John was a former psychologist. It was important to remember. By the way, why the former? He was actually current and practicing on a large scale.

The guy sighed. He stubbornly looked at his hands:

“People, who are here. There are wonderful people here and a lot of them need my help. I want to help them.”

“I thought I’ve founded a unique society,” the leader of the community softly argued, “a happy one, haven’t I?

It seemed that Yibo was balancing above the abyss. Any uncautious word could push him down:

“But it doesn’t mean that people don’t face difficulties, here.”

“Oh, that’s inevitable,” the man agreed. “So you like to save, don’t you, Wang Yibo? Are you a savior?”

“I’m just Wang Yibo,” he said humbly. “Just a guy who found out that he wants to give himself away to people around him.”

John chuckled, got up from his chair with a quick movement, came to the table where there was a jug of water:

“Do you want to drink, Yibo?”

“No, thanks.”

The man poured himself some water and put the glass to his lips, asked as if nothing:

“And how are your parents, Yibo? Shouldn’t you give anything to them?”

The guy almost choked on air out of surprise. Bastard. Anyway, it was expectant:

“My father would still never understand my way of life. He’s much of a social climber for that. But my mom... I hope she’ll join us one day.”

“Us...” John echoed, putting the glass back. “I like how it sounds, coming from you.”

The leader of the community came back to his place but this time moved it a meter closer to Yibo, sat in front of the guy:

“You are an embodiment of the fact that my son Yixuan has already become an adult boy. I’m so proud of him. What do you think of him, my Yixuan?”

“The best mentor I could wish,” Yibo said sincerely, but John didn’t believe him for some reason”

“Well-well, you’re such a well-schooled one, calm down. It’s not an exam, it’s over. Tell me as it is.”

“That’s what I say,” Yibo lifted eyes on John, “Yixuan... put so much soul into our conversations and he keeps doing it.”

John sighed and leaned back in the chair, crossing arm on his chest. Yibo hid his eyes behind lashes again.

“Yeah, you’re right, he does everything with devotion,” John exhaled. Then he fell silent for a moment and spoke again, and his voice poured a sweet syrup, a calming one, trustful. “Usually I don’t have much time to give to every Brother or Sister of the community even ten minutes. Our conversation... we won’t have much of that in the future, Wang Yibo. So, if you want to tell me something, anything, so it’s time.”

Yibo’s heart beated loudly. He understood that he had to say something but he worried so much, chose words, and finally squeezed from himself:

“Thank you. I... wanted to thank you. Thank you for... giving me a chance.”

John smoothly got up from his chair and suddenly sat at the armrest of the chair of Yibo. The guy instantly alerted out of such proximity. He felt John’s perfume, felt the warmth of his body but those weren’t feelings Yibo wanted to experience... He really understood for the first time what this man did to Zhan. And Xiao Zhan had been feeling the same perfume, and this warmth and these hands on himself and inside…

“Yibo, look at me,” John softly put him under his chin and lifted the guy's face. O Lord, Yibo, just don’t cry, that’s all we need. John was looking at him from above, smiling, but his eyes weren’t smiling, they never did. “I’m sure that you were a wonderful child. You still have a lot of innocence and purity within yourself... I see it and I also see that you can’t lie at all. There's so much tension in you, Yibo, and you... it seems, you are somehow displeased with me. What did I manage to make you upset with?”

John’s sight sneaked deep into his soul, burning down, twisting. His energy was heavy, as if embracing, like a thick smoke of an incense burner in a little stuffy room. Yibo’s lips trembled for some reason, he couldn’t avert his eyes from John, understanding that the leader's face got blurred from tears that betrayingly showed in Yibo’s eyes.

“Well, my boy...” he tugged at his chin.

“I hate you,” he spit into his face, and tears still ran down his cheeks. Like a baby, oh god. “I’m disappointed. I... imagined you differently.”

“Well,” John nodded, “now I believe you.”

Yibo tried to pull away, but the man held him firmly.

“What’s wrong, Yibo? Give me your pain away.”

“You... you aren’t bothered with the people in the community,” Yibo was hissing through his teeth. “You don’t care!”

“That’s not true...”

“Then you don’t do enough! Ron who could die if Rose hadn’t brought him a panama hat, Fred who is enduring unfairness one after another, all women and everyone who's separated from their families...”

“That’s true,” he admitted calmly. “Do you think Yixuan could solve all these problems?”

What? Yibo came back to his senses. Why Yixuan?

And here, finally, he got it. Oh god... What if the great and powerful John was afraid of his own son? Was he afraid to lose all his sweet power, authority, trust? He’d raised an heir and waited for a trick from him?

“No,” Yibo answered. “But you still could put in more effort.”

“You’re right,” John softened and, finally, let him go. “My burden is heavy, Yibo. Happiness of one – unhappiness of another one. I swear, for the last thirty-some years I’ve done everything I could for my community.”

Yibo turned away and wiped off his shameful tears. He didn’t like the reactions of his body.

“I love them so much,” John went on, “I love everyone who lives here. And now I see I’m not alone. You love them just like I do, Yibo. Not less. I’m so glad. I’m really glad you came to us.”

Damn. It would definitely bribe Yibo if he was really open with John now. Old manipulator. Yibo even was slightly excited how cleverly the man run everything he needed. He wondered, would he got under his influence if he really came to the community not because of Zhan but to find himself? He definitely would.

“Help me, Yibo,” John’s voice lowered to the touchingly-sincere whisper. “Help me make the lives of people in the community better. I see that you want it as much as I do.”

“It’s my Way,” Yibo repeated.

“And mine too,” he picked that up. “We have one Way, you and me, my boy. Will you help me on my Way? Will you help the old man make these people a little happier?”

“Me? Help you?” Yibo literally freaked out. Nice move, John, people have much to learn from you.

“Who, if not you?” the leader went on soulfully. “I see the potential in you. And such a big heart! Will you be my faithful warrior, Yibo, my shield? Only by working together can we really change something.”

The bait hid the hook. Actually, he had to admit that the leader had a lot of years of experience.

“Of course, if I can help, I will,” Yibo responded and added intentionally, blinking off the last tears from his lashes, “because that’s what I want. Our common goal.”

“You are a good boy,” John smiled and slapped his shoulder. “Then go, it’s time. Yixuan’s been waiting for you. We’ll meet at your Initiation, Yibo, I’m glad you’re with us.”

He went back to his chair, sat there and unfolded the newspaper. The audience was over.

Yibo hesitantly got up, wiped his face with hands and went to the door:

“See you, John.”

“Have a good lunch,” he recommended and smiled again.

Wang Yibo went downstairs in some strange state: as if he’d been hit over the head. And all his emotions were pumped out, emptied him.

Yixuan met him with understanding, slightly sad smile:

“My father rolled you out, right?”

Yibo even shaked his head so that this delusion would go away faster:

“Does he treat everyone this way?”

“You’re not the first and not the last,” he said and put some roll in his hands. “Here, get it. You’ll wear it for the Initiation.”

Yibo took the roll not even looking at it, just starting to realize what an emotional pressure John had kept him under all that time. How was he able to do it? Who was he, a fucking hypnotist?

“Hey, Yibo,” Yixuan put hands on his shoulders and shaked him a little, looking him in the eyes. “It’s alright, you’re good. Now go to lunch, then take a shower and change. I’ll come for you when everything is ready.”

No one touched Yibo during the lunch, no one bothered him with questions and talks. All of them treated him carefully as if... Damn, as if he’d filled with John’s blessing, fuck it. So that’s what adults thought of when their children came back from John in tears. Maybe, they supposed that the leader emotionally swayed children, that he treated them like adults, and in the study there was nothing between him and the child except for the conversations. Old son of a bitch…

Showering was the best decision for that day. Yibo didn’t want to leave it, vice versa, he wanted to clean himself. He had a strange feeling that the old sectarian raped him too but mentally. Sneaked into his soul, touched his inner strings... Oh, damn... Yibo almost vomited out of the disgusting row of associations. His head buzzed.

He tried to get distracted with preparations. Wore clean underwear (they’d really brought him four newer sets of clothes from the warehouse), rolled out what Yixuan’d given him. That was a loose linen shirt with a long straight neckline, white with wide sleeves. There was a complex embroidery along the neckline that had a mix of white and light-blue patterns. As Yibo found out later, it was a task for little girls in the Community to embroider such shirts. That's how they spent their evenings while their male peers sang in the choir.

As it turned out, every Brother in the community had a shirt like that. They wore it for every Saturday meeting with John, and for every important event. They had to care about their shirt, to preserve it.

They tucked them in their trousers, and looking at other Brothers who dressed up like one, Yibo even thought that it looked like a crazy office party.

“It suits you so much!” Isaac told him warmly. “If only Lia could see how good-looking you are!”

Other lads also congratulated him, slapped his shoulders and back, even William had smiled at him sincerely for the first time:

“It’s your day, Wang Yibo. Let’s go. We’ll see you off to the Assembly Hall.”

Men went to the Hall in the same white linen shirts with embroidery, all of them were joyful, happy. Eyes of all of them were glowing with anticipation of the holiday.

They had rearranged benches in the Assembly Hall, had put the only huge table in the center assembled from several smaller ones, layed there a white tablecloth, had put some treatments, tables and glasses ceremonially. All of that was really like a holiday. Yixuan came up to Yibo first of all men, looked him in the eyes:

“How are you? Alright now?”

Yibo vaguely nodded, looking for Zhan with his eyes. He came into the Assembly Hall with his father, both were wearing the same shirts but it really suited Zhan. Zhan, among others, approached him too and nodded:

“Congratulations, Wang Yibo. It’s your day today.”

“It makes me feel a little weird,” he confessed quietly. “I don’t like being the center of attention.”

“Don’t worry, you won’t,” they heard Sung Joo’s voice from the side, and the guy welcomed Yibo with a hug. “We always have John for that.”

“Hold your tongue!” some old asian man barked at him, apparently, his father.

When the Hall filled fully with men, John arrived. He was wearing the same shirt but it also had golden patterns intertwined with white and blue ones. He told them to have a seat, having placed Yixuan to the right of him and Yibo – to the left. Then he held a welcoming speech and said why they all gathered here today. He congratulated Yibo and his son and then waved somewhere to the side and the guy noticed that today children were serving them. They were standing in white linen shirts at the side. Who was with a towel, who was with a tray, who was with a jug of water, ready to serve older Brothers. Mark Tomashevski came up to John with a tray in his hands where there were... disposable needles and patches. Yibo’s eyes went wide when he saw that and John took a wooden bowl from the table, lifted it up, demonstrating to everybody, and said triumphantly:

“You know what to do, Brothers!” he gave the bowl to Yixuan.

He calmly took a disposable needle from Mark Tomashevski’s tray, took the top off it and, encouragingly smiling at Yibo, instantly pierced his finger, draining a couple of drops into the bowl. A second and there was a patch on his finger – the bowl was given to the next person – Victor, and he did the same to himself. Every man gave away some of their blood into the common vessel, Mark was moving slowly from one person to another. Yibo was watching it with a mix of curiosity and some deep fear. He saw how Xiao Zhan, following his father, pierced his finger too, casting a sight of his black eyes at Yibo. Going around the table, the boy finally got the bowl to Yibo: there was a little pool of blood on the bottom, not so much to be honest. Yibo looked at Yixuan with a question: did he have to add his own blood there? And if John drank it then, Yibo wouldn’t be surprised. But the leader stretched arms for the bowl:

“Yibo, give it to me. Look, every Brother’s given away a piece of themselves to you, a piece of their blood,” he dipped tips of his fingers and stretched them to Yibo’s face, leaving marks on him: on his forehead, under eyes, above his upper lip, on the dimple under his lower one. “Swear on the blood of your Brothers that the Brotherhood will be above all for you: above your own self, above your wishes. Your life now is only for the sake of the Brotherhood and the Community. Do you swear?”

Motheroffuckingod, flashed through Yibo’s mind. Fucking cultists.

“I swear,” he said solemnly.

“Now we have to drink from our glasses and then exchange them,” John instructed him. The others were looking at them in some reverent solitude.

Yibo just stretched an arm and took his glass, put it to his lips. There was some stewed-pear drink or something, sugary-sweet, unpleasant. He made a couple of sips and then John and him exchanged glasses. Then Brothers got up from their places and came to Yibo from behind. He went nervous, started to glance back but John stretched an arm to him:

“Don’t fear. Drink.”

Yixuan smiled warmly at him across the table. The guy looked around but he couldn’t see Zhan, only Sung Joo’s voice somewhere at the side:

“Don’t worry, bro, we’re here.”

God, if you’re out there don’t let me die today, he thought and finished John’s glass in a single gulp. That was alcohol! Something fortified, mixed with sugary-sweet stewed drink and something else, astringent. A wave of heat went through his body and then echoed in his head so much that he started to fall backwards, but dozens of hands caught him, carefully taking him from the table like in the cradle. It went dark in front of his eyes, then the darkness dissolved and he saw faces above him, and there was Zhan who smiled and said:

“It’s alright, Yibo, relax...”

“It’s okay,” said Seung Yeon, at the side. “Breathe and just... fly.”

The next flash happened when men were holding him over their heads, on outstretched arms, swaying him as if on the air waves, like at the flight, and they were singing something... They were singing together, something beautiful and sad (1). Yibo’s hands were spread out to the sides, dozens of hands were holding him, under his head, legs, body, hips, hands, were swaying the guy and singing. His head was dizzy, he couldn’t catch breath as if he really was somewhere high, he found himself in weightlessness, and not being able to struggle with his state and the fact that his body was fully weak and relaxed, the guy just closed his eyes and gave himself to what they were doing with him. It seemed that nothing really bad was happening. It was even interesting, strange but funny…

Then they carefully put him back to his feet and he leaned on someone. That was John.

“Welcome to the family, Wang Yibo,” he said. His voice was somewhere above, in front of him. The men were standing around him like a single cocoon, hugging each other’s shoulders, and he felt an ephemeral sliding kiss behind his neck. That was Xiao Zhan.

Fuck what is going on here? Madness, Yibo thought and then lost consciousness.

Chapter Text

Yibo woke up in his bed, in the House of Brothers. There was some blessed serenity around, slightly stuffy. He heard a voice of Brother Menz at the side:

“Woke up, Yibo?”

The guy stirred, tried to sit up on the bed. His head instantly got buzzed and his body ached as if he’d come back to the building site yesterday.

“You okay?” Brother Menz sat on his bunk.

“Ok...” he mumbled. “Where is everybody?”

“At work, of course,” the man smiled. “I’m not working today so they asked me to look after you. Do you have a headache? Are you going to vomit?”

Yibo shaked his head, responded shortly:

“I do. I’m not. I am rather hungry...”

“We can fix it!” Menz reached to his bedside table and got a tray with breakfast from there. “Here, lads have brought for you... they care. And brother Seung Yeon left a little present for you,” there were two white pills on a tissue in the corner of the tray.

“What is it?” Yibo felt really embarrassed for what had happened, like a schooler who got drunk at his own prom.

“Probably some painkillers,” Menz was all courtesy. “You’d better eat, you only had lunch the day before...”

“What was that liquor in John’s glass?” Yibo frowned at the already cold breakfast. “That was totally... strange.”

Menz laughed:

“No one knows the recipe of his wonder-cocktail, but it’s harmless. To tell the truth, we didn’t expect ourselves that it would strike you so much. After all, we all have different tolerance to alcohol and moreover that you’re also an Asian... But I agree, John had raised the dose, no one expected you would lose consciousness momentarily.”

There couldn’t be such an instant killing effect from ordinary alcohol, Yibo thought. That was an actual liquor mixed with some drugs or barbiturates.

But he didn’t say anything out loud to not escalate it, just asked:

“Did I scare you when I got faint?”

“Well, we were really surprised,” Menz laughed. “Yixuan was scared most of all, but Seung Yeon was nearby, he checked your pulse right away and said you’d just lost consciousness. Three of them brought you here.”

“Three?”

“Yixuan, Seung Yeon and Zhan.”

“Mhm... I need to thank them and... apologize, I suppose...”

“For what?” Menz smiled. “You’re not guilty of anything. Lie here, today you are free from work.”

“No, I have to come to Isaac at the warehouse, I promised him! He had hopes for me.”

“Well, see for yourself,” the man wasn’t going to argue. “But first make a short visit to Yixuan, tell him you’re alright.

“What do you mean – make a visit? Right to the Family block?”

“Of course,” he shrugged. “You’re in the Brotherhood now. You can go everywhere you want, except for the Female block.”

Yibo got breakfast, took a shower. His condition got better, pills reacted, his head didn’t buzz so much anymore. He got dressed and headed to the three-storey house, not yet feeling sure. But no one stopped him, no one asked what he was doing there. Magic. Men and women from the Familials passed by him, children played on the artificial grass. They smiled at him, nodded, and he nodded in response, though his hesitation didn’t go away yet.

When the guy knocked on the white house (ironically, though maybe that was made on purpose), a Sister in the apron opened to him again, but another one this time. She looked at him, not saying a word, and Yibo said:

“I came to Yixuan.”

A silent nod and he was allowed to come in, and then he heard hurried steps on the ladder and Yixuan appeared:

“Yibo!” his mentor hugged him friendly. “Thank god, I worried so much! How are you?”

“I’m okay,” the guy gave him a sour smile. “Seems I’ve come back to my senses, just came here to say that I’m alright and to thank you for helping me to get back... home.”

Yixuan smiled:

“Sure, how could I not? I couldn’t just leave you there. You are my ward. I’m responsible for you. Father allowed you to rest up...”

“I’m still visiting Isaac at the warehouse, I promised him.”

“Then let me accompany you,” Yixuan hurriedly got his shoes on and they went out. “You can go to Ivan at the garage tomorrow, and on Saturday tell me where you’ve chosen to work. We have to say in advance so that they can put you into the schedule.”

“Schedule?”

“Yes, I was just about to tell you,” they were walking slowly, strolling, “every man in the community has three services to perform.”

“Services? Like women who organize barbecues?”

“That’s right,” he nodded. “You already know about one of them, it’s a night patrol.”

“Yes, I’ve heard. But I thought that the same people do it...”

“No, watchmen constantly change. From 12am to 1am every night three watchmen go around the Community. It’s necessary so that curfew is maintained. Then they let out the hounds.”

Yibo saw those hounds. The kennel was situated in the Domestic block, not far from a chicken coop. Yibo decided not to ask why they needed so many precautions if their community did so well. He just nodded, and Yixuan went on:

“The second service is a duty in the observation tower.”

Yibo got stricken, even slowed down a little bit:

“What tower?”

“The one near the gates.”

It meant that his intuition hadn’t lied: the first time he’d approached the Community gates it always seemed to him that someone had been watching him from the tower. That was true. Goosebumps went through Yibo’s spine out of realization:

“By the way, why do you need it? I always wondered.”

“So that the guys like you wouldn't die from thirst or hunger at our gates,” Yixuan chuckled. “Well, you see, some curious people try to get to us sometimes... To write something on our walls, try to break into, shout some religious mottos...”

“And what is the third service? You said there are three of them.”

“The third one...” Yixuan briefly hesitated as if it was embarrassing for him to say it. “The third one is in my father’s house.”

Yibo noticed that Yixuan didn’t say “in our house” as though distanced himself from his parent.

“Our Sisters have service to work at father’s house as maids and cooks. Female laborers are not allowed, you know... But sometimes we need, hm, male hands...” It was really embarrassing for Yixuan to say all of that. Yibo saw how his cheeks went red and how he pulled his shirt’s collar as if freeing himself from the tight knot of an invisible tie. “Of course, my father and I can do a lot around the house, but... There are rules that some of the Brothers should do it...”

“And it doesn’t apply to the Confidants, does it?” Yibo clarified with an inner chuckle.

“Right...” Yixuan eventually got fully confused, blushed all over. “The Confidants are free from this service...”

Of course, Yibo wanted to tease Yixuan, to poke him into the imperfections of the community structure but he decided not to throw at him any stinging words, moreover they finally aligned with the house of Xiao Zhan and Yibo decided that it would be not bad to somehow show to Zhan that it was alright and the appointed meeting in the evening stayed in force.

“May I also thank Brother Xiao for helping to bring me to the House of Brothers?” Yibo stopped in front of the house of his beloved, not without inner worrying.

“Sure, it could be nice,” the mentor shrugged and they headed to the door. Yibo knocked on by himself, Yixuan was behind his back. The door was opened by the landlady:

“Good afternoon, mrs. Xiao, I’m here for Zhan,” Yibo smiled.

“A new Brother?” she lifted her brows and looked at Yixuan with a question. “Yours one?”

“Yes, this is Wang Yibo,” he answered politely.

“Yes, I remember him,” she cast shortly and went away, not inviting them inside, just left the door slightly opened. Yibo looked back at Yixuan with a question and he just shrugged.

“Mrs. Xiao has always been a strict lady.”

They hear some hurried footsteps and then a door opened abruptly:

“Yibo!” Xiao Zhan’s eyes were burning, when he saw a guy but the fire instantly went out when he saw Yixuan behind his shoulder. Zhou Yixuan suddenly averted his eyes and blushed.

“Hello, Brother Zhan,” Yibo answered cautiously, smiling. “Sorry for the unexpected visit, Brother Yixuan and I were just passing by and I decided to come by, to say thank you for helping to carry me yesterday...”

Xiao Zhan didn’t look at Yixuan anymore, only at Yibo. His sight was absolutely caressing, as much as it could be within the bounds of decency. It was written on his face: Are you okay, Yibo? I was worried, and Wang Yibo winked – slowly and with a meaning.

“I’m glad you’re alright,” Zhan said and that was all they could tell each other in front of Yixuan.

Having stomped just for a moment, Yibo smiled in the end:

“We’ll meet on Saturday, Brother Zhan, see you,” and left the porch.

“See you,” Zhan got back home.

“Do you have good relationships with Brother Zhan?” Yixuan asked thoughtfully.

“We do,” Yibo answered, understanding that he was not a talented actor enough to behave indifferently towards Xiao Zhan. “I fancy him, that’s true. I think Brother Zhan is a good person.”

“Mhm,” Yixuan dragged on. “People in the community like him. Will you come to Seung Yeong at medical post to thank him?”

They both stopped at the crossroads.

“Isaac is waiting for me at the warehouse,” Yibo shrugged. “I think I will thank Seung Yeon on Saturday then. Thanks for the company, Yixuan, can I go?”

The man nodded and then watched Yibo go for some time.

Several hours that Yibo spent at the warehouse with Isaac dragged so long and dull. Mainly because Isaac was talking nonstop about his daughter Lia, listing all of her good points, beauty and all the rest. The old man was matchmaking his daughter so shamelessly that Yibo understood he wouldn’t be able to get away from him if he made a decision to work at the warehouse. Moreover, that was immeasurably more profitable to be with Ivan’s cars. Their chances with Zhan for escape would rise. And what could a warehouse give him except his old backpack? At the time of escape he would prefer to pack light. But after dinner the time flew by faster. Yibo figured out how he could sneak from the House of Brothers. In the restroom, in the shower room of the House of Brothers there were little windows. They were situated lower than the window at the house of laborers, it was easier to get through them. But the guy didn’t know if Brother's sleep was light, for instance, William... If he noticed Yibo’s absence he wouldn’t stay silent. However, after the bedtime hour all of them calmly fell asleep. Isaac messed longer than others, grunting like an old, tossing and turning, but then finally he quietly snored too, and Yibo got to the restroom on tiptoe, opened the window and easily jumped down.

Yibo was at their place tight in time, even the first one. He was quietly sitting in the dark, waiting for Xiao Zhan. His heart was beating a little in anticipation. It seemed the last time they had been together like that centuries ago. In fact, it hadn’t passed much time since the moment of their intimacy at the medical post but a lot had managed to happen.

The barn door opened and closed, in the darkness Xiao Zhan’s voice called:

“Yibo?”

“I’m here.”

A dim light of a new lantern flashed. Xiao Zhan smiled and rushed to him, embracing his neck with arms:

“Yibo...”

They pressed to each other with their lips, Wang Yibo closed eyes and felt as if some burden was leaving his chest. While he was keeping Xiao Zhan in his arms all the rest became nonessential, not scary, he got hope that they could do anything, that they would be able to overcome everything. Actually, it seemed to Yibo that he was able to turn the whole world upside down if Xiao Zhan was behind his back.

But if they kept on kissing like that then it would end up with fucking and the guys wouldn’t finally talk. Yibo forcefully pulled away from Zhan and, smiling with a corner of his lips, asked:

“Shall we talk?”

Xiao Zhan sighed out, nodded obediently:

“Yes.”

They both sat on the hay briquettes, in front of each other, sat cross-legged, touching each other’s knees. Yibo started:

“Mary Cole committed a suicide six years ago, having hung herself in the living room of the white house where she lived with John. The reason for her action is not clear. That’s an official story, Zhan. Now I’m ready to hear your version.”

Xiao Zhan chuckled:

“Did you talk with Yixuan?”

“Wanted to know how a suicide can become a murder. I don’t think you’re so strong and cold-blooded enough to hang a woman under the ceiling in her living room.”

A guilty-sad smile:

“You don’t trust my words at all, right?”

Yibo shrugged and took his hand:

“I believe that you think you have a relation to her suicide. But you surely didn’t do it by your own hands.”

“Of course not.”

“Then tell me.”

Xiao Zhan sighed once again, collecting his thoughts. His sight got distant, as if he was already looking there, into the past, and the man started his story:

“I was twenty then. It was right that time I got a driving license, started to go beyond the perimeter and found out the meaning of the word pedofile. I was then... ugh... unstable. I don’t know how to explain. I had a mess of emotions, I felt everything at the same time: pain, grudge, fear, desperation, anger, a desire to change something, confusion, insecurity... I don’t know, Yibo, I have no idea, I was really nervous at that time, twitched out of everything, the world turned upside down inside me, I had over appreciated myself, John, the community where I had been raised, my parents... I was sick, I agonized. And Mary, she... directed our choir, trained me for her replacement. I was angry with her. I kept thinking if she covered for her husband or didn’t really know what he did with her boys in his study. Then I understood that she was like everyone, just closed her eyes. She couldn’t not know, she had close contact with all children, here a fool would notice a lot of patterns. She just stuck her head in the sand, maybe she didn’t want to think about it because she felt helpless to change anything. Maybe she didn’t want to admit that she married and lived all her life with a monster. I don’t know... But I was really angry with Mary, actually, just like with my parents and everyone. But once we had an argument...”

He sighed deeply, catching breath, and then went on:

“I don’t even remember what our argument started with. Seems Mary wasn’t satisfied with my work with boys, accused me of discouraging them and then I went crazy... I think I wasn’t controlling myself at that moment. I remember I pushed her in her chest and started to speak out everything to her, everything I knew, all the truth... Yibo, I made her listen to it...”

He sighed impetuously, and Wang Yibo squeezed Zhan’s fingers in his hand.

“She wanted to get away from my confessions, shouted at me to stop, to go away, she wanted to go away herself, but I didn’t let her, I blocked her way and was talking, talking... I told her everything: how John started to molest me when I was eight, how he touched me, how he made me come for the first time, how he forced me to touch him – first with my hands and then...”

Xiao Zhan choked on his own emotions and fell silent, catching breath. Continued more calmly:

“I just took my anger out at her, Yibo. I was angry with everybody but resolved to speak it out only to her. I saw that she heard what she had always been afraid to hear, saw how her inner defensive barriers ruined, how bitter, scary, shocking truth flooded her, and I... Yibo, I savored that, like a sadist, at that moment I felt relieved... Mary was first who I told everything to, apart from that attempt to talk with my father. I poured out all my pain on her, I didn’t feel sorry for her. I saw as she felt sick and painful out of all of that, but everything I thought about at that moment was – right. Serves you right. I had no sympathy for her. And in the evening... in the evening she hung herself.”

They were sitting in complete silence. Yibo was looking at Zhan, and Zhan – at his intertwined hands, at his knees, everywhere but not at Yibo.

“What did you feel when you found out about her suicide?” Wang Yibo asked quietly.

“Fear, desperation, guilt. I felt I was a murderer. I felt even sicker than before. I regretted doing that.”

“And now? What do you think of it after six years?”

“I still think I’m a murderer, Yibo, but... but anger replaced the guilt.”

“Anger?”

“Yes. After everything she’d found out about her husband, when she’d learned what had been going on with her boys everyday over so many years, she didn’t find anything better than... to escape! That all was just an escape from the uncomfortable truth, guilt, her helplessness... She didn’t do anything to help her pupils, just self-destructed... I... despise her.”

“Zhan...” Yibo started cautiously. “Now you’re at her place. What are you doing?”

“I?” Zhan went all burning. “You know what I’m doing...”

“Zhan...” Yibo softly argued. “How many boys have you really helped?”

“Don’t do that!” Zhan withdrew his hands from Yibo’s fingers and closed eyes.

“Yes, fortunately, you’ve not committed a suicide,” Yibo went on, understanding he was hurting Zhan badly. “But your method is far from being perfect too. Are there boys in the choir who John never molested and who he never raped at least once? Have you managed to protect them fully from any traumatizing experience? What have you really done?”

“Oh, Lord...” Zhan hid his face in hands, Yibo thought he was feeling now like Mary Cole on the day of her suicide.

“When you started to go beyond the perimeter, why didn’t you report on him? You could have reported it to the police.”

“You know, Yibo,” he took his hands away from his face, his eyes were moist and glowed a little bit feverishly, “it seems to me the state police is bribed by John. Not only in New Mexico, but surely in Texas. I mean: my license is fake, our cars, as you said, travel without technical inspection. The very first cop should have given me a ticket, but I’ve never been fined, even when they stopped me. Once I got pulled over by two cops: a young one and an older one. The young one asked for the documents for the car, insurance and all the rest, and the older one told him: He is from the Community, and they let me go just like that. It was in Texas, on my way to El Paso. And then... sometimes people escaped from here but they were brought back.”

“What?!”

“Yes, it doesn’t happen often but three years ago, for example, one Sister decided to leave. She had an access to go beyond the perimeter and she just decided not to come back. She left a car at the gas station in Anthony and didn’t get back to the curfew. Two policemen took her back in the morning as if she was John’s property. Though she was kicking and shouting that she was a U.S. citizen, that she had a green card, that she had rights... But they just handed her over to John like a thing, like an escaped dog. And... I have no idea where she is now. We haven’t seen her since then.”

Yibo felt goosebumps on his spine out of these new facts, he couldn’t endure and got up, starting to go around the barn back and forth, being really worried:

“Okay, if the police are really bribed then we have other services! You could have contacted the FBI!”

But having seen an embarrassed and slightly confused face of Xiao Zhan, Yibo caught himself. Oh, damn... He kept forgetting that Xiao Zhan had been raised in the community since childhood. That he hadn’t studied in ordinary school, hadn’t watched any ordinary movies and cartoons, that he hadn’t played “mafia and spies” with his friends. Probably, he hadn’t even heard about any brave policemen, reading rights to some criminal as in films that he was raised on. And, of course, he didn’t know about the existence of the FBI.

“I’ve definitely heard something about it,” Xiao Zhan confusedly justified himself, “But I don’t really know...”

“Zhan, listen,” Yibo sat in front of him, took his hands again and looked him in the eyes, “I see why you think that there’s no way out from this situation, because you see the world as small and narrow. It’s not your fault, you’ve been taught to see it like that. But in fact, it’s much bigger and wider than it seems. John is not omnipotent. Oh, no, far from it! There's the FBI – Federal Bureau of Investigation, they are above police and they can help. There are also a lot of other structures that can get interested in case of this sect.”

“Yibo!”

“Zhan, it’s a sect!” Zhan’s hands twitched, but Yibo didn’t let him go, “No, listen to me! As harsh as it may sound, but people were right. Try to turn off your emotions and look at it objectively. There is a clear vertical of power in the Community: laborers – Brothers – the Familial – the Confidants, all of that is strictly regulated. They repress the will here, watch every move of every person, control all aspects of their life, violence of conscious takes place here, replacement of values, here they push people to separate from the outside world so that it could be easier to manipulate them. And at the head of them all is John with his personality cult, impunity. Zhan, all of those are signs of the true totalitarian sect!”

Xiao Zhan looked confused, somewhat desperate, helpless. He wiped eyes and sobbed, then looked desperately at Yibo:

“But how... how do you know all of that? Why are you so sure?”

Yibo bit his lip. Should he tell him that he’d just watched BBC documentaries?

“Beyond the perimeter everybody knows it,” he said. “That’s... obvious.”

Xiao Zhan painfully moaned and hid face in his hands again. Yibo sympathized with him, his heart ached out of all that was happening, but he felt that Xiao Zhan was especially sensitive now and Yibo could manage to convince him:

“To stay here and to try to ease the situation for children by giving away yourself is a really shitty plan, Zhan. We have to escape from here. Together. You and I.”

“No!” he impetuously gasped. “You know I can’t leave them! I won’t leave them like Mary Cole!”

“You’re not leaving them! We’ll get away from the Community not to live a happy life in Chicago or to drink cocktails on Miami Beach. We’ll get away from here to save children, to dismiss all this Community and to send John into prison till the end of his life.”

Xiao Zhan lifted on him an amazed sight:

“Yibo... are you... serious?”

He licked lips and responded absolutely honestly, as much as he could:

“When I was in John’s study he asked me why I was here, and I told him – to help people in the Community. And, damn hell, I wasn’t lying. Yes, I’ve come here for you, Zhan, because I fell in love, I wanted to figure things out,” he himself smiled at it, “but I had no idea where I got. And when I did, when I started to understand... I stayed. Not because of you, Zhan. Or rather, not only because of you, or us. It’s more serious and wide-scale now. You’re right, children – they’re more important than you and I. They need help. And I offer you to really do it.”

Xiao Zhan’s eyes burnt:

“But how, Yibo?”

“You need to report on John. To contact the FBI. To attract the attention of the society and media to the Community. It will drag long and heavily, Zhan, I’m telling you now. They’ll start an investigation, they’ll pour out a lot of dirt on all of us, absolute strangers will dig through the most secret corners of your soul, trying to savor some dirty details. But that’s what needs to be done. That’s what you need to sacrifice, so that all of you would become really free. And that’s the only way you can really save your children and give them a chance to live a normal, full, happy life.”

Xiao Zhan’s lips trembled. Yibo could imagine how scared he could be now.

“Yibo...” the man clung to him, holding back tears. “Can we manage it to the end? We are not... superheroes from fantastic films, I’m just a teacher of music and a choir director, and you’re just a seller in a hardware store. Can we really defeat such a giant like John, with all his power and connections?”

“John’s not a giant,” Yibo said confidently. “He’s just a criminal, covering his atrocities with beautiful words and thick philosophical treatises. Don’t deify him! He’s old, miserable and... he’s also scared. Trust me, he has his own fears, his weak points. And the moment you realize he’s just an ordinary miserable criminal, this moment you’ll manage to defeat him.”

Xiao Zhan looked at him with a doubting look, shaked head:

“I... I don’t know, Yibo... it’s too much. I just...”

“I don’t force you to get up right now and fall on the grenade,” Yibo stroked Xiao Zhan’s hands, calming, “I know that your world is turning upside down once again and it’s... unpleasant. Give it a thought. Just think about it without rushing. I’m here, I’m here with you, Zhan, do you hear me? And I’ll be beyond the perimeter at the time you resolve to do it.”

“Why’re you near?” he asked, lifting his brows as if he was going to burst into tears. “Now you know absolutely everything! That I am a sectant who’s cheating on you with a person who’s been raping me since my childhood. You know, that I’m a murderer, coward and silly, who doesn’t even know the structure of the world beyond the perimeter! Why do you need it? Why do you need me?!”
“Do you really want me to answer this question?” Yibo moved closer to Zhan, throwing his legs on his own hips, so he could reach to the guy’s waist and embrace it with arms, clutching the man closer to himself. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry that I’m so foolishly and madly in love with you. I’m sorry that I don’t see a criminal in my beloved, that I want to help him with everything and to just be near...”

The guy didn’t finish because Zhan quickly and passionately kissed him. Yibo could be just happy with it, but he was confused with a nervous haste of Xiao Zhan’s movement: he was kissing him harshly, assertively, kneaded him with lips, firmly pushing his tongue in Yibo’s mouth, pulled down the guy’s pajama pants, and he stopped his partner:

“Hey, Zhan, hold on...”

“What? Why do you stop me?” there was some scary mix of desperation, fear, desire and gratitude. “Don’t you want me anymore? You don’t want me because of what I’ve told you, right?”

“Gosh... I want you,” Yibo carefully put his hands away from himself, fixing his pants though Didi was just about to wake up. “I always want you. But... that’s not what you need now.”

Xiao Zhan looked at him, his lips trembled heavier, and he finally burst in tears, couldn’t restrain his emotions anymore, cried in a good way, letting out his emotions, buried in Yibo.

They sat like that, with intertwined arms and legs of each other. Yibo was stroking Zhan’s back and patiently waiting until he was calm again.

Then midnight came, watchmen started a patrol around the Community, it was time the men went back to their houses. Zhan ran away from the barn first. He had to think about a lot of things and to resolve the bravest action in his life. And Yibo still had to think up a plan on how to escape from the ranch. There’s no place for haste in such an important case.

Chapter Text

On Friday morning Yibo went to Ivan at the garage. As he’d expected he liked it much more. And though he wasn’t allowed to go beyond the perimeter as a newborn Brother, he still was near the vehicle and it gave him hope that Xiao Zhan and him could escape from here. In the evening Ivan and him gave each other high five: Yibo promised that he would work with him.

After work he went to Isaac at the warehouse to take his phone and to call his mother. Their conversation was easy and idle this time: it seemed she started to get used to her son’s rare phone calls. What was she thinking about him? Did she believe in the legend about Antarctica and penguins? The woman only asked:

“How much longer will your expedition be, son?”

And he responded:

“Till November, for sure, maybe I’ll stay longer here.”

“Does it take so long to clean penguins? Is this oil slick endless?”

“We have a lot to do even without this, mom...”

When he was giving phone back to Isaac the old man didn’t restrain and asked:

“Where will you go to work, Yibo? Have you decided yet?”

“I have,” he looked at the man directly, “Sorry, Isaac, but I’ll stay at the garage, with Ivan. Cars are more to my own liking.”

The man didn’t say anything and Yibo understood that the man was offended: he got visibly sad, his lower lip sticked out. The man slouched and took Yibo’s phone back silently.

In the evening the guy was given a new set of “dress” trousers and less worn out black shoes. He ironed his shirt with white-blue pattern because he had to visit his first Saturday meeting with John tomorrow.

The men headed there right after breakfast – all of them in the same shirts, brushed and ironed. Women were flowing in the same way from another part of the settlement. They didn’t have similar shirts or dresses, they just had their “dress” clothing but each of them had a white-blue ribbon, waving in their hair, and those who had short hair fixed them on their foreheads or wrists.

“Staring at women again?” Yixuan laughed shortly, approaching Yibo in front of the Assembly Hall. The guy just chuckled. “Wait, already tomorrow, Yibo. Dance party is held tomorrow and you’ll find yourself in the center of attention of all unmarried Sisters of our community.”

If Yibo was a heterosexual then maybe he would be happy with this news. So he managed to smile and added humbly:

“You know, I don’t really like everyone’s attention.”

“You can endure at least one time, Brother,” they heard Sung Joo’s voice, the guy came up to them and stood third. “But, if anything, I’m ready to share this fire.”

“Look at you, a lifeguard,” Yixuan laughed. “How aren’t you still married with a temper like yours?”

“No idea,” he smiled. “It’s difficult to choose just one.”

Yibo noticed Xiao Zhan: the guy approached them, as if being a little shy, shook everyone’s hand, scared to look Wang Yibo in the eyes so as not to give himself off.

“Who knows what topic we’re having today?” Sung Joo asked, looking sideways at Yixuan.

“I don’t know, some debriefing,” he shrugged. “Something’s happened in the Female Block. I’m not really aware. By the way, Yibo, have you already chosen where you’re going to work? With Ivan at the garage or with Isaac at the warehouse?”

“With Ivan at the garage,” he answered without hesitation, glancing at Xiao Zhan, did he hear that? Did he understand why exactly Yibo chose the garage? The guy nodded slightly. “It’s more interesting to mess with some hardware.”

Yixuan encouragingly nodded:

“Then I’ll mark you and put you into the service timetable from next week.”

“Let’s go inside,” Xiao Zhan offered. “It’s time we took a place.”

Yixuan and Sung Joo turned to the entrance first, and Xiao Zhan deliberately fell behind two steps from them, whispering lightly to Yibo:

“On Sunday after the party.”

Zhan didn’t say either place or time, so Wang Yibo lifted a questioning look at him but the man had already gone further, putting hands behind his back. So, well.

Yibo’s place changed. He thought he would still sit at the farthest row but Yixuan pointed to the bench in the middle of the common row. He was sitting on of the firsts among Brothers, only the Familial and the Confidants were in front of him. That’s it. So did it mean that since he was Yixuan’s ward then it placed him on some pedestal among other ordinary Brothers of the community? He might have been envied. Yibo caught a lot of interested female glances on himself but smiled only once when Rose approached him:

“I can finally congratulate you, baobao!” she affectionately touched his cheek, but the guy noticed that the woman was still somewhat sad. “I didn’t even doubt you.”

“Thank you, Rose. Are you coming to the house of laborers? How’s Ron?”

“Is missing you, of course,” she smiled. “But don’t worry, I’m looking after him.”

“Yeah, I know,” Yibo nodded.

Finally everyone took their seat, Victor went on “stage” with a microphone, greeted the audience and called John. The leader, as usual, was met with applause and shouts.

The guy understood that John was charismatic, smart and charming, understood that he’d already brainwashed everyone here and had compelled them god knows what, but Yibo still didn’t want to understand how people loved him so much. Unconditionally, exalted, absolutely. Like God.

John took the mic and smiled. This time he was dressed simply: dark-blue shirt with rolled up sleeves, dark trousers, nothing special. The leader welcomed people and waited for silence, and then started:

“My children, Brothers and Sisters... I wanted to talk with you about joyful things today, about our new Brother, about plans for our Community, but something has recently happened and it, surely, cannot be ignored.”

A bitter sigh waved through the female part of those presented. John himself looked sad, but rather – annoyed. When he was speaking he was looking only at men for some reason, as if complaining to them:

“This Wednesday, on such a happy and joyful day for us, when we were celebrating the joining into our ranks of a new Brother Wang Yibo,” a careless gesture into the guy’s direction so that not to attract much attention and further, “two Sisters, Lia and Charlotte decided to break all the conceivable and inconceivable rules of our Community, and to sin, to go against all the moral values of our Community, to tarnish with their dirt the place where we live.”

Isaac gasped in fear behind Yibo, and Yibo understood that it was about his daughter. He turned to the female part: women were sitting with their heads lowered, two of them cried. One – a female copy of Isaac, thirty years old jewish with black curly hair Lia, another one – curly-haired little blonde with puffy cheeks, obviously, Charlotte, not older than twenty years old. The girls were sitting in different rows, Lia was slightly farther from Charlotte. The first one squeezed her cheekbones and just winked off drops of tears from her eyelashes, the second one was almost bursting into tears, her shoulders trembled, her face was burning.

“It’s difficult to say it out loud,” John complained to the men. “Let Sister Ursula tell, it was her who found them.”

Sister Ursula got up from her place. That was a woman who had taken Mart Tomashevski to the blessing, Yibo hadn’t liked her even back then.

“Where was it, Sister Ursula?” John started the interrogation.

“In the hay barn,” she said and Yibo broke into a cold sweat. Wednesday, the hay barn, goddammit... Xiao Zhan and him met there the next day! Lord, they had just walked over the abyss and hadn’t got caught only by a miracle! Just a little bit and they could have been discussing not these women at this meeting but Zhan and him! “I went there after the curfew, around midnight.”

“Sister Ursula,” John nodded, “clarify to those present, what were you doing there yourself so late? Brothers and Sisters can misunderstand you.”

“Everyone knows I care about children,” she started with a look of a devote righteous. “August has had stomachache these days and I decided to bring him some milk. When I came to the cowshed, I saw they they didn’t have feed. And went to take some hay...”

She glanced at John and he smiled encouragingly. Yibo didn’t trust any of her words. She went to take hay after the curfew, sure thing. She might have watched Lia and Charlotte, old bitch…

“Tell it to the end, Sister Ursula, what did you see when you came to the hay barn?” he pushed her lightly.

“These to adulteresses!” she shouted abruptly, pointing at the two crying women. “On the hay! Naked! They... they were doing it with each other!”

Wave of gasps and sighs went through the Assembly Hall. Women from the Familial covered their mouths with hands, men were furious, Isaac was crying, Yibo got stunned out of all that was happening. He was scared mostly because he kept drawing parallels between these women and Xiao Zhan and him. He couldn’t get rid of the thought that they’d managed to avoid it just by pure chance.

“I share what you are feeling, my Brothers,” John talked only to men for some reason. “I also feel disgusted and... painful. These ungrateful women... they showed once again their real attitude to us, their actual respect. They don’t have one! Those, who have to desire the sacred marriage, trampled it under their feet, spit onto the heart of our community and preferred each other’s company to what we offer them.”

Yibo clung to the bench. His ears bleed out of all the nonsense John was talking, but he felt as the men around him went burning with some rightful anger. Most women were already crying, the rest of them were sitting, with their heads lowered. Some woman from the confidants shouted:

“No, John, that’s not true! How can we not love our husbands and sons? Please, don’t speak for everyone! Punish these two apostates, they are freaks, perverts! We ourselves don’t share it!”

Almost all women agreed with the speaker.

Yibo felt as if some madness was about to start. Charlotte was crying loudly, tears were falling from Lia’s face on the gray skirt like large hailstones.

John came up to the last one, having stopped at the distance:

“What can you say for yourself, Lia?”

“Forgive me, John,” she squeezed from herself, trying to suppress sobbing.

“But... I liked her. I fell in love with her, John. Please, punish me but not Charlotte.”

“How dare you talk about such a great feeling in the context of your dirty crime?!” he shouted so sharply at her that the woman shrinked all over. “Moreover, in front of your father’s eyes! Look at him!” John pointed at Isaac. “Look at him, Lia! Don’t you see how you are hurting him?!”

The woman lifted sight at her father and cried with new force, hiding face in her hands. Then John went past three rows and stopped at one where Charlotte was sitting:

“And what can you say, girl!” she couldn’t still settle down. There was her mother next to her, putting a cotton ball soaked in ammonia under her nose. It turned out the girl was from the Familials. Waiting until the girl started speaking, John said, “Young Charlotte, a little fresh flower that was defiled by that unholy Sister! How could you succumb to this same-sex fornication, knowing what a big crime it was?! You are not an alien, you were raised in the community! I remember holding you in my hands on the day you were born!”

“Please, forgive me, John!” the girl finally said. “She... she forced me to do this!”
A new wave of gasps, whispers and fear went through the audience. Lia even stopped crying out of shock and lifted her big black eyes to the curly Charlotte’s head.

“She... seduced me!” Charlotte shouted. “I... trusted her because... I’m still a child. And silly.”

Charlotte was not less than eighteen, otherwise she could be still considered a child and couldn’t have the opportunity to go to meetings. She wasn’t a child at all. And about her silliness – Yibo couldn’t agree with her here. The girl definitely was repeating her mother’s words, or someone else’s, resolved to the betrayal of her lover.

“Oh, baby...” John fatherly put a hand on her head, turned to the male row, obviously speaking to the girl’s father, “It’s so painful to watch this innocent flower lying in dirt. The girl should clean herself. I think she can spend the next year working and praying, she shouldn’t try to find herself a husband.”

One of the Familials nodded:

“Yes, John, thank you, John!”

And then he came to Lia again:

“And what can you tell me now, Lia?”

Her lips trembled, she looked only at her laps and crossed fingers:

“Forgive me, John.”

“Remind me, why did you actually come here, Lia?”

“No, John, please, don’t...” her arms shaked.

“Tell everyone!” he raised his voice and oppressed her, hovering over, “Why did you come to us?!”

“Because of my mother’s death...” she cried again, not being able to suppress it. Shrinked under the pressure of his voice, clung to the bench, but John grabbed her face by the cheekbones and lifted it up abruptly, peering her with cold disdain.

“Yes, indeed. You came here after your mother’s death and why, Lia? What were you looking for? Go on.”

“God,” she said. “I lost God that time.”

“That’s right,” John was still holding the girl's face, squeezing her cheeks. “Brothers, Lia had been a jew actually until she lost her mother. She lost her jewish god and came to me, under my protection, asked to accept her, to let her live in our Community and to find God again. What did you tell me then, mm? Remember, slut.”

“John, please, don’t...”

“Brothers, she told me then John, you’re now my God. I was looking for you. And my Way leads to you. That’s what she told me.”

“I beg you, please, John...”

“But this lying scum wasn’t looking for God...”

“John, please, forgive me...”

“...and her Way didn’t lead to me...” he shaked her head in his hands. The girl modestly clung to his wrist and kept whispering:

“John, please, please, John...”

“Her Way led to this little girl,” he waved at the side of Charlotte, “who hasn’t even managed to find a husband yet! You wanted to seduce her innocence, to deface and ruin everything her parents and I have been putting into Charlotte’s little light curly head for long years! You are a snake that appeared from beyond the perimeter, and you became a Sister just by mistake...”

He pulled her head away from himself as if it was disgusting to him to even touch the girl, turned to Isaac who was quietly crying on William’s shoulder:

“I’m not punishing you seriously just because I pity your father. But I won’t let you marry here. No one from Brothers will marry you anyway. So you won’t be a Sister anymore.”

“She’s not a Sister to us!” some woman shouted. “She only defiles our Sisterhood!”

“Get back to laborers for the rest of your life,” John concluded. “Your father will suffer because of you. His sufferings, ruined dreams – those are your real punishment. Who’s your mentor?”

“No, John!” she got scared and cried with new force, trying to catch his hand, but didn’t let her do it. “John, please, don’t, don’t touch her!”

“Who is your mentor?” he repeated by syllables.

“Me,” they heard Rose’s tired voice and Yibo involuntarily twitched. “I’m her mentor, John.”

The leader took several steps back, getting back to the first rows. Rose was sitting right behind the Familials – with a straightened back and a lifted chin, sad and calm. John silently stood beside her. Rose sighed and lifted a direct sight at him. And at the same moment he swung and slapped her face. A thick clicking sound echoed round the Hall.

Yibo didn’t understand how he jumped from his place. A moment and he was standing on his feet and looking at John, clenching fists. There was an oppressive silence in the Hall, Rose, having noticed Yibo, shouted at him not in her own voice:

“Yibo, sit!”

John lifted his head at Yibo. The guy didn’t know what he was looking like from the side, didn’t understand how John and him were in front of each other now... And why did he think that Rose was inviolable? Why, when John had been approaching her, the guy’d expected anything but not a slap?

“What’s the matter, Brother Yibo?” the leader lifted his gray brows and went away from the female row, turning his attention to the guy. “Are you also angry because these lesbian sluts defiled the day of your Initiation with their nefarious doings?”

Yibo feverishly licked lips. Damn... It would be really brave and beautiful to tell him something like: Hey, bastard, take your hands off of them! Brave, beautiful... and incredibly stupid. He saw that none of the men would support him now, at least, openly. People here were not ready for it, they’d been enduring the tricks of this person for ages... Who was blind, who scared, who really benefited from all of that, but no one would support lonely Lia who was imposed all the guilt.

However, he had to explain why the hell he actually got up from his place and the guy couldn’t think of anything better than:

“I’ll marry Lia, John. For re-education.”

A shocked gasp went across the Hall. Yibo was afraid to even glance at the side of Xiao Zhan. He was looking only at John and saw that he’d managed to surprise the old man. He got sturtled for a moment and the burst laughing, cupping his face in the affectionate grabbing of his hands:

“Brothers! And Sisters... look what a cute, light and kind boy the Fate’s given to us! Sorry, my child, but I have already announced a punishment for Lia, and she’ll take it fully. But thank you. We all remember what a sympathizing and big heart of a real Saviour Wang Yibo has.”

John let him go and Yibo fell back on his place, feeling as his knees trembled.

John tiredly glanced around and told everyone:

“You’ve exhausted me today. I’m not coming to the barbeque. Go have lunch, and then to Labor Day. I’m announcing a dance party tomorrow.”

“John!” one of the women shouted. “Will you forgive us?”

“I’ll think about it,” he cast that to the female row and went through the side-door.

First people started to talk to each other, then fiddled, started to get up from their places, someone was already leaving the Assembly Hall, someone wanted to talk more to their neighbor.

“Stinky lesbian!” some woman, who had shouted more than others, approached Lia and spat on her. Her spit got stuck in the girl's black hair, but Lia didn’t seem to notice it. She was looking only at her father, called from her place:

“Dad, father...”

Isaac was crying, clinging to William, pressing a tissue to his eyes with his trembling knotted fingers.

Lia got up, came closer to the male row:

“Dad, daddy, please, forgive me.”

He didn’t look at his daughter, only cried more out of her voice. William roared at the girl:

“Leave the old man alone! Do you want to finally kill him? Get out, laborer!”

Yibo was looking at it as the triumph of some mass madness. He was scared and felt really bitter. Some woman intentionally pushed Lia hard with her shoulder while leaving, saying to her through her teeth:

“Dirty pervert...”

She almost fell but Rose appeared near, she caught her already former ward, whispered to her:

“Let’s go, let’s go, dear...”

“Rose, and you, forgive me! Sorry that you were hit because of me...”

“I’m not angry with you, dear, I’m not, let’s go...”

Rose took Lia away, William took away Isaac. Yibo was still sitting at his place somehow devastated and wistful. Glancing at him with his black eyes, pursing his lips, Xiao Zhan came past and didn’t say anything to him. Yibo worriedly watched him go. Yixuan was near:

“Yibo... how are you?”

Yibo looked at his mentor and confusedly shaked head:

“Don’t know... strange.”

“I’m sorry that at the very first meeting you witnessed... all that...” the young man squinted.

“Let’s go away from here,” Yibo decisively got up from his place and went towards the exit. Yixuan caught up with him:

“Yibo, and you... would you really marry Lia if father had allowed it?”

Wang Yibo looked down at his feet: he wouldn’t just say to him that his attitude to questions like that was diametrically opposite. At least because he didn’t give a fuck about the local rules... But Yibo understood that it was unfair to take it out on Yixuan, he only shrugged:

“I don't see what the big deal is. I just wanted to help her.”

“Yibo...” Yixuan hesitated. “What you have done was unusual, brave but silly. Don’t do it anymore.”

“Is it a mentor's order?” Yibo couldn’t hold back his sarcasm. He was angry, really angry.

“Don’t do that if you don’t want us to get into trouble,” the guy repeated softly. “After all, Lia wasn’t specifically punished, father still lets her stay among us...”

“Do you think that to stay among you is a great blessing?” Yibo couldn’t stand, stopped and, getting his face closer to Yixuan, went on with hissing, “Do you think you are the heir of the Garden of Eden?! Yixuan, finally, open your eyes!”

Yibo angrily walked to the house of Brothers and Yixuan remained standing again, watching at his back.

Wang Yibo instantly regretted his last words. He messed with Yixuan in vain, he told him in vain things like that. Still, Yixuan could stay kind not forever. No matter how much he liked his mentor, he had to admit that they still barely knew each other.

But most of all Yibo was worried about Xiao Zhan, especially because he came past him after the meeting and didn’t say anything. It seemed they had to talk again.

All Brothers were having dinner under the oppressive silence. There was no hint that they were going to have a fun barbeque in the evening.

Yibo changed into the clothes for work, all Brothers went together from their house to the collection point.

“William, what is our task for today?” Menz asked as if by the way.

“We start the building of a new house for Sisters, for ten beds. They have really bad accommodations, especially laborers. A lot of them have already deserved to become Sisters, they just don’t have spare places.”

“Oh, Yibo, your dream will finally come true!” Arek laughed shortly. “You’ll finally get to the female block, and will gather all unmarried Sisters around you!”

Yibo squeezed a sour smile from himself and glanced at Isaac. The man was depressingly silent and looked somehow pale.

Finally they arrived at the new building site. Laborers had already come there, Fred was fixing fresh markings. Isaac took two guys to the warehouse for the equipment. While Brothers were coming, Ron ran to Yibo:

“Yibo! Yibo!” they happily hugged each other and, thanks to Ron, Yibo finally smiled, “How’re things, Yibo? Why are you so sad? Did you miss me?”

“Badly,” he said to the men, fixing his panama hat, he almost didn’t lie, “And you? Do the lads mess with you?”

“Oh, no, absolutely not!” he beamed with a warm smile. “Working together today, aren’t we?”

Yibo hoped to find a moment and to talk to Xiao Zhan, so he dubiously shrugged. He heard from the side:

“Wang Yibo, a protector of the less fortunate!” that was Sung Joo approaching. “The best friend of Ron-take his-bring that, a self-proclaimed husband of the only lesbian in our community – Lia! It seems you’ve already gained yourself a new nickname among Brothers.”

“I thought I already had one,” Yibo responded calmly. I am the Princess’ Toy, aren’t I?”

“Already not,” he said, gagging. “Now you’re Robin Hood. Or maybe Robin Wang will be better. Or Yibo Hood, which one do you like more?”

Yibo didn’t manage to answer – he saw Xiao Zhan accompanied by his father. The men Xiao came up to another group of Brothers. Zhan saw him but only glanced. Damn, that was bad... A bad premonition echoed with vomit inside his stomach. It seemed, Xiao Zhan was mad at him. Did he really believe Yibo’s words about marriage?

Isaac came back with helpers, they brought wheelbarrows and shovels. Men were given a shovel and a couple of fabric gloves for work. They had to dig the foundation pit today.

All of them got down to work without words. The building site was fenced from the female block with a metal grid, where women came up from another side and stopped to watch men working. Unlike Sisters, who came and slowly started laying tables for future communal meal, female laborers were not allowed to visit.

Yibo heard some denunciation next to himself:

“Victor, Brother Menz is talking to some female laborer!”

Wang Yibo lifted head on his housemate and then glanced at the sneak. The one wasn’t either ashamed or confused. That was alright, those were the rules. Victor answered quietly:

“That’s his sister. It’s okay.”

Xiao Zhan stood on another side from Wang Yibo and was silently digging the pit, not glancing back at him. Childish. Yibo first got angry, then he went so lonesome that he felt the urge to immediately clarify everything with Zhan, so he wouldn’t feel hurt at least because of them. But that wasn’t easy to do. Ron, who missed him so much, followed Yibo everywhere, telling him about everything. However, William took a shovel away from him very soon:

“Or you'll faint right here, and there’s still no sense from your digging. You’d better help lads to carry wheelbarrows with soil.”

The man obediently nodded and took the closest wheelbarrow, turning her to the wooden lift on the ropes. Using the chance that he was alone now, Yibo changed his location and stood next to Xiao Zhan. The guy just glanced at him, pursed lips and went on working.

Yibo felt annoyed and fun simultaneously. Xiao Zhan had never been mad at him. The guy didn’t even know how to behave. Just said:

“Zhan, are you angry with me or what?”

“You’re really fast with words, Yibo,” he exhaled, non-stop working with a shovel. “You make vows and promises really easily. It... it gives rise to concern.”

Of course, that was on the surface.

“Zhan,” Yibo started cautiously. “You understand that those vows and promises don’t mean anything to me, don’t you?”

“I do,” he responded shortly, “that’s the thing.”

Ron came up to them with a wheelbarrow, the men got down to loading it with sand and stones. Sure, Xiao Zhan was afraid: he saw how easily Yibo lied about the most sacred moments for Zhan. He might have tried that on himself, asked himself how much Yibo was honest to him. Wang Yibo saw that and was still angry. It seemed to him that the difference between what he told Xiao Zhan face-to-face and what he told the others was obvious, wasn’t it? Didn’t Xiao Zhan feel that? Or was Yibo just an undercover agent from God?

Ron went away again, Yibo asked Xiao Zhan quietly one more time:

“Zhan, don’t you understand that marriages that are arranged here are not real? That they’re not recognized by the U.S. law?”

“I guessed that, I’m not a fool,” he mumbled. He was working fast and well, and didn’t look at Yibo at all. “But here it’s all recognized... and your words... have power...”

“Damn I wasn’t going to become her husband for real!” Yibo hissed.

“So you shouldn’t have offered that!” Xiao Zhan answered in the same tone, especially sharply plunging the shovel into the ground. “She could at least hope...”

“Oh, Zhan, trust me, she didn’t hope for anything. She’s a lesbian after all, everything she could hope for was friendship...”

Ron came up again. A silent work with shovels again. Men got sweaty under the sun, went red, they were thirsty. They’d started cooking barbeque so far, a smell of roasted meat was floating around the whole community.

Maybe Xiao Zhan was jealous? Yibo thought. He might not have reacted like that if Wang Yibo just came to the defense of Lia as a friend.

“Don’t you at least doubt me?” he decided to clarify, when they were alone in their territory again. “I’m gay, I wasn’t really going...”

“How do you know it?”

“What?”

“How do you know that you’re really gay? Did you have experience with women?”

Yibo got dumbfounded even:

“No, I didn’t...”

“Then you cannot know for sure!” Xiao Zhan concluded, took his shovel and even went to another side, to his father, who was digging in another area.

They didn’t talk that evening. Xiao Zhan was near his parents, and Yibo was with Ron. Neither John nor Yixuan came to the barbeque.

Another difficult day the guy washed away with relief under the shower. His muscles would ache the next day, and there would be a dance party in the evening, god…

When all of them went to bed and the room sunk into solitude only Isaac cried quietly on his bed.

Yibo pitied the old man. Today all his dreams for future life, that he’d had so far, got ruined. His daughter Lia, a smart one and a real peach, would never get married and would never give him grandchildren. Moreover, she would be a laborer till the end of her life, without the opportunity to get a chance for something bigger. She would sleep on the bunk like that, to work like a slave, to the point of exhaustion, without any entertainment, despised by everyone and humiliated. That was a horror, not a life. Yibo didn’t know what he would do if he were at her place.

He quietly got up from his bad and approached Isaac’s, squatting down at the headboard:

“Isaac... Don’t cry, don’t... calm down.”

“Oh, Yibo...” the old man exhaled, clinging to his hand. “Thank you for what you’ve done, thank you... Sorry I haven’t told you before...”

“Nevermind,” Yibo encouragingly slapped his hand. “Don’t lose hope. Everything can still change in the most radical way...”

“What could change here?” the old man sighed. “Lia will stay a disgusting lesbian forever, and now everyone here knows it.”

Yibo abruptly recoiled from him, he got swept under the wave of outrage and genuine pain, as if it was his father who just betrayed him. He came back to his bed without words and didn’t try to calm Isaac down anymore. The old man actually became disgusting for him.

Yibo couldn’t fall asleep for a long time, living through all the events of the day in his mind.

Chapter Text

Wang Yibo was bored on the morning of Sunday. He had to have rest actually or work on his spiritual advancement, to talk about something with his mentor but Yixuan didn’t come to visit him and Yibo also felt blue, he didn’t want to do anything. He slowly crawled to lunch, and then to dinner. After lunch he got even more tired: his head felt heavy, his muscles ached after the Labor day. He lay down on his bed and didn’t notice when he fell asleep, having sunk in a short but healing sleep.

He dreamt about Xiao Zhan and him escaping. How they were in Chicago, standing in front of some building and Yibo said:

“It's the federals' headquarters. We have to get to their main department.”

But they didn’t let them go further than the first floor and the security post. Xiao Zhan shouted:

“I witnessed a crime! I want to report!”

But no one listened and no one needed them.

Yibo woke up with some bad feeling within him. It seemed to him that it was some prophetic dream. And really, it would be like that, they would get in to the Federals without any proof. They would be really lucky if they’d met some dull agent-investigator who wanted to get a promotion but they would rather wave them off. They were just two guys, nobody and nothing, one of them didn’t even have a citizenship with his fake documents. Yibo really doubted Xiao Zhan had a green card and was legally in the USA. And what if John would get to them? What would it take him to say they were mad and to send them to the asylum, bribing whoever he needed? And then nothing would prevent him from giving them two unnoticed farewell injections with the hands of some outside nurse.

No, it would be foolish to go to federals without any evidence. It was not enough to just gather some acknowledgement letters from children. They needed a bomb. The real informational bomb, moreover, the one that would be impossible to ignore, the one to rip media apart, to sneak like a virus into the Internet, to every home, so that even on another continent everyone knew that John Cole was a leader of a totalitarian sect and a pedofile.

Yibo was lying and thinking over that while Brothers didn’t finally call him for dinner.

After the dinner Arek, Menz and him ironed their “dress” shirts and went to the dance party. Isaac and William didn’t attend such events because of their age, and Silver hadn’t still recovered from his wife’s death.

The dance party was also organized in the Assembly Hall. It was the only building that could accommodate a big number of people in the community. The benches this time were moved to the walls, the center of the Hall was cleaned for dances, there was a buffet with some light starters and drinks on it in the corner. Wonderful.

Yibo couldn’t help but notice that in the community all necessary measures had been taken to entertain and keep a person: an exhausting work so you couldn’t think; and if you have time to do it then there's the books of the local author for you; if that didn’t reach the goal then go further to become a Confidant, build your private life, dream of a free house, if you want entertainments – then get moved by the children choir, dance or watch the old good films. You didn’t really have time to get bored here.

Entering the Assembly Hall, men and women habitually took their places on the left or on the right, sticking to the wall like embarrassed teenagers. There were some watchmen at the party: someone for the Familials or the Confidants, from the male and from the female side, to control over the observance of rules and moral and ethical behavior of Brothers and Sisters.

On the events like that it was allowed: to dance in couples, to talk to each other, to get to know each other.

On the events like that it was prohibited: to get handsy, to kiss, to fight and to start arguments, to retire and to hide from the watchmen etc.

Having come to the Assembly Hall, Yibo really found himself in the center of the female’s attention. Everyone of them wanted to meet “the newbie”, so they kept approaching him: Sisters brought him drinks, food, and looked for every possible way to talk to him, to introduce themselves and to leave an impression.

“Hi, Wang Yibo, my name is Luisa. Do you want to drink? I’ve brought you some water.”

“Hi, Wang Yibo, my name is Katharina. I thought that, maybe, you’re hungry... Here, take the tartlet.”

“Hello, Wang Yibo, my name is Hatsumoto Megumi. I'm Myami’s younger sister, did you hear about her? Romeo and Julliet, they’ve recently gotten married.”

“Hi, Wang Yibo, my name is Lucy. Do you like dancing? As for me, I do! Would you ask me for a dance today?”

In general, in the first ten minutes of his being on Sunday evening, Yibo drank and ate for the rest of his life. He tried to be polite to all the girls, and didn't reject anyone directly, though he understood that he wouldn’t be able to stay neutral for long. He had already gained the glory of a womanizer in the community in some mystical way, his reputation went before him. And actually, Wang Yibo didn’t mind. That was a perfect shield for his gay nature. It would be better if everyone thought he was a talkative womanizer than that he was a potential sinner-sodomite.

Almost simultaneously Xiao Zhan, Kim Sung Joo and Zhou Yixuan came into the Assembly Hall. The first and the last one looked really embarrassed, only Sung Joo felt entirely at home.

“Yibo, look! Look who I took out today!” he bragged to him about the lads, as if they were his personal catch. “Your mentor and Xiao Zhan who just never come to events like that!”

“Really?” Yibo shortly smiled at Xiao Zhan and the guy blushed all over and averted eyes. “I thought you’re the first fiancés here.”

“First fiancés, of course!” Sung Joo laughed. “These two sit at home every dance party, like two crabs. Or like two snails. A crab and a snail! It’s only me who’s the first fiancé here. But my reputation is damaged. Now girls are afraid to approach me, in case I try to kiss them...”

It was clear to Yibo why Xiao Zhan was at home all that time, but he still asked out of politeness:

“How come, guys? You’ve left Sung Joo here all alone in his endeavor.”

“I... can’t dance...” Xiao Zhan mumbled, still being ashamed for some reason.

“I...” Yixuan didn’t find what to answer, Wang Yibo quickly decided to change the topic.

“Yixuan, by the way, I wanted to talk to you. Not for long. Can we have a minute?”

The man sighed with relief and they went to the corner of the Hall. A music suddenly flew from the speakers, something old, from the 60s. The evening started.

Sung Joo and Zhan went to the buffet table, girls crowded in a group at the side, waiting until Brothers would start asking them for a dance.

“I wanted to say sorry for yesterday,” Yibo instantly started. “Sorry for being rude, I shouldn’t have taken it out on you, just...”

“You’re partly right,” Yixuan interrupted him. Yibo saw that those words were hard for him. “I... wanted to talk to you too. Of course, not now and not here. During the week, okay?”

“Yeah, of course.”

They embarrassingly smiled at each other. Yibo turned to the Hall. Some girl that was braver than the others decided to come up to Sung Joo and Zhan first. Someone was already dancing, first couples were being formed.

“Are you going to gazebos today?” Yixuan asked.

“Where?” Yibo was surprised.

It turned out the Assembly Hall had a backyard with a made up flower garden. Plants were in tubs between benches, and, most importantly, there were four different hand-carved gazebos. Yibo had been living in the community for two months so far and hadn’t known about this place. Yixuan showed him the garden, laughing, and presented him gazebos. There were also Familials on duty next to them.

“If anything, you can take a girl here and talk privately,” Yixuan told him.

“Privately?”

“Well... you know: here a man and a woman are left really private only after the wedding, in their bedroom. Watchmen only ensure the Brothers won’t get to girls with kisses and keep their hands down. And what you are talking about doesn’t interest anyone.”

“Have you ever been there yourself?” Yibo was curious.

Yixuan got shy again:

“No. Though I’m sure a lot of them would agree. That’s why I don’t go to parties: they’re too overwhelming.”

“And you’ve decided to make an exception for today?”

“Just wanted to support you,” Yixuan slapped his shoulder. “How’re you actually? Do you like dancing?”

“Yes, sure.”

“But we have mostly old music here...”

They came back to the Hall right at the moment Xiao Zhan needed help. He didn’t know where to hide from one annoying Sister who was telling him off:

“Brother Zhan, you never go to dance parties! To come here after so many years and don’t dance is just a crime! Why’ve you come here at all?”

Sung Joo was already dancing with someone and couldn’t help his friend so Yixuan and Yibo came right on time:

“Brother Zhan is just better at singing than dancing,” Yixuan smiled at the girl. “Sister Clarise, let me ask you for a dance?”

The girl seemed not to have expected that: she blushed all over, got shy and instantly became warmer. Yixuan bravely led her to the dancefloor and Yibo and Zhan’s eyes finally met:

“Are you still mad at me?” Wang Yibo asked.

“I don’t know,” he involuntarily mumbled.

“Is today’s meeting still on schedule?”

“I think, yes.”

“You haven’t said when and where.”

The music was over. Xiao Zhan significantly lowered the tone of his voice:

“I’ll just seize the moment and take you from the party. Everyone would think you’ve gone home and at the Brother’s house you’ll tell you were sitting at the gazebo.”

“Good.”

Yixuan and Sung Joo came back to them.

“Phew, it’s hot here,” Sung Joo was all red. “I wanna drink. Zhan, if you’re going to sit like that till the end of the night then you’d better go home. I can’t take each Sister that asks you for a dance on myself.”

“I’m leaving soon too,” Yixuan said, “I’ll dance with someone else just to be polite and will go back home. Still such evenings are... not for me. And you, Yibo, will you ask someone out?”

“You’ve been waiting for this evening for too long,” Sung Joo mocked him. “Look at these Sisters: each of them wants to dance with you.”

Wang Yibo glanced at Xiao Zhan. He still needed to ask someone out just to keep his public face.

“Of course,” Yibo smiled. “Just let me choose, Brother Sung Joo!“

He glanced over the girls: someone had already approached him today, and he didn’t know some of them. Girls greedily caught his sight, smiled, waved at him and then he suddenly saw Jessica-Ann Robinson.

She was wearing her “special” dress, looked nice, with flowing hair. But there was something new in this girl, to be exact, nothing less than a slightly seen pregnant belly.

If Yibo hadn’t see her literally a month ago, when she still had a perfect waist, he would never believe it. But Jessica-Ann was surely pregnant, a fourth month, not less. So... she had already been pregnant when Yibo’d come to the community, and maybe... maybe even when she’d come here herself.

Intrigued, Yibo demonstratively crossed the dance floor, heading to her. Sisters got worried and started to whisper: a newbie wanted to ask someone for a dance! Who would be his first choice?

The girl lifted disbelieving eyes on him the time he approached her:

“Jessica-Ann Robinson?” Yibo asked quietly and smiled. “I’m Wang Yibo, a new Brother. Can I ask you for a dance?”

It was the time a slower music started, the girl nodded and Yibo took her to the center of the Hall. Other couples were joining them gradually, Yixuan went out to dance with someone, Sung Joo stayed next to Xiao Zhan to have a rest.

“Do you remember my name?” she asked, when they were idly dancing to the rhythm. The girl perfectly adjusted to Yibo.

“Of course. I came up to you when I was still a laborer, do you remember?”

She nodded.

“And you haven’t even been confused with it?” she pointed with her sight to her obvious belly.

“Are you pregnant?” Yibo had to lean to her ear to talk and the girl tried to reach for him with all her body. They looked really cute from the side.

“What do you think, huh?” Jessica-Ann was surely not timid, unlike the first impression she gave. “I don’t look like just a fat.”

“How are you here like this?” Yibo asked. Brothers and Sisters around them saw how Yibo and Annie started to actively whisper right away the moment they started dancing.

“Brother Yibo’s not used to taking it slow,” Sung Joo chuckled, sitting next to Xiao Zhan. “Just look at them: he’s going to get into her ear with his tongue...”

But having glanced at Xiao Zhan, he instantly broke off:

“Zhan, what’s up? Your face is like you’re having a heartburn...” he saw that Xiao Zhan kept an eye on Yibo and Jessica. “Don’t you tell me you also like Je...”

But then Sung Joo broke off himself once again, gasped, looked at Yibo, then at Zhan again and dragged:

“Noo...”

“I’ve made a mistake coming here,” Xiao Zhan said, not being able to look away from dancing Yibo and Jessica.

“Broo... you... are you... you..?” Sung Joo wasn’t able to say his guesses out loud to the end, and Xiao Zhan went all red and, finally, looked away, lowering his sight.

“Disgusting,” Sung Joo concluded, looking at his childhood friend. “Has John made you like this?”

“Sung Joo, for god’s sake...” Xiao Zhan grimaced. They have never discussed neither their sexual orientation nor their common experience they’d had in childhood with John. That was an unspoken taboo among all the Nightingales, and today Sung Joo had crossed the line the first time.

“Does Brother Yibo know about your feelings?” he asked quietly.

“Sung Joo, I’m not going to talk to you about it,” Xiao Zhan greeted his teeth.

“Well okay, don’t tell him anything,” he asked as if nothing. “He’s surely attracted to girls. A famous womanizer. You really fucked up here.”

At the same time Yibo and Jessica kept talking:

“How are you here like this?” Yibo asked.

“Because I’m a fool,” Jessica-Ann said just like that, still turning at people worriedly. “Listen, if you want to talk – let’s go to gazebos. There’re a lot of ears here.”

Yibo nodded at her, the song was over and under the common attentive sight Yibo took Jessica-Ann under the elbow and led her to the gazebos.

“Oh, Brother Yibo doesn’t waste time!” Sung Joo exclaimed but then caught himself and looked sideways at Xiao Zhan, “Sorry, bro. Zhan, you look awful...”

“I need some water...” he said through his teeth.

At that time Yibo and Jessica went out to the back yard. One of four gazebos was already taken, they placed in the second one under the attentive eyes of one Sister from the Familials who was on duty in this garden and was slowly walking ten meters away from them.

Jessica-Ann stretched out her legs and her body and said dreamily:

“Ah, I wish I could smoke now.”

Yibo chuckled at the straightforwardness: was she like that with everyone? Too bold or just silly?

“Do you know your parents are looking for you?”

The girl lifted a head on him, her bold presentation instantly disappeared, exposing a scared unsure child:

“Are they? Still looking for me?”

“The papers are all across Anthony,” Yibo answered seriously. “When was the last time you talked to them by phone?”

“I don’t remember,” she sighed. “Maybe, two days before I came here.”

Yibo’s brows lifted:

“My mentor Yixuan told me your parents know where you are and, moreover, that they’re not against it!”

Yibo understood even then the information was fake, but it was still unpleasant when he looked at the surprised eyes of Jessica-Ann:

“Really? I don’t know... Maybe, my mentor really talked to my parents, and I’m just not aware. Maybe she’s just lied to your Yixuan...”

“Who’s your mentor?”

“Sister Ursula.”

“Oh, shit...” Yibo blurted out and Jessica-Ann mirthlessly laughed.

“Yeaah...” then she looked at him with an appraising look, “You’re cool. I already understood it yesterday.”

“How’d you get here?”

She winced and pouted her lips as though she didn’t want to talk about it at all, but she still said:

“Because of the filling...” Yibo didn’t understand at the beginning that the girl was talking about her pregnancy, “I started working when I was in senior school, part-time as a servant in a cafe and met one married guy... Ok, well... when I saw that I got pregnant I got scared. I thought my parents would kill me so I came here.”

“But why exactly here?”

“The father of the filling is from here,” she pursed her lips and her look said that’s how it happened and I have no idea myself how.

Yibo was at a lost what to say:

“From here? A married guy? Is he from the Familials?!”

She just nodded, crossed legs, swung the one that was above:

“But don’t ask me who... My mentor will kill me if I do.”

Yibo looked at the girl attentively, said through his teeth:

“I’m not sure I want to know.”

She nodded as if that’s right, Yibo asked:

“Does the father of the child know?” oh, god of course he does, Yibo responded to himself, “What did he say when you came here?”

“Well, they can’t drop me out, I’m still underage that’s pregnant because of one of the Confidants,” Jessica-Ann was saying it so simply as though she didn’t feel any inconveniences, “That is why they quickly made me a Sister and locked here. I have to keep the secret and should deliver within the community, I don’t know... I’ve already regretted coming here.”

Yibo himself couldn’t understand why Jessica-Ann’s story moved him so much, and couldn't let him stay indifferent. Maybe because he knew exactly that there, beyond the perimeter, her parents were looking for her?

“Why are you so open with me?” the guy asked. “Are you talkative like that with everyone?”

She chuckled:

“No, everybody here thinks that I’m an innocent lamb gotten lost in life,” Annie turned to the lady on duty that was still nearby. “But it’s seen on you that you’re normal, not like all these crazy fanatics. You’ve come here recently, right?”

Yibo nodded.

“I liked that yesterday when you stood up for Lia,” and then she suddenly said what Yibo hadn’t expected to hear from her, “You’re a normal guy and, most likely, gay.”

It seemed his jaw dropped because Jessica laughed joyfully and clarified:

“Sorry but it seems I was right. Despite everything they say about you here, that you’re a womanizer and all that stuff, I think, you’re gay.”

Wang Yibo even frowned, asked unfriendly:

“Why do you think that?”

“Because all the girls were lying in front of you like a carpet,” she said, slyly squinting. “And your sight didn’t glow even once. Though we have some nice girls here, even nicer than me. You’re too indifferent, Wang Yibo, I think you’re not interested in women at all.”

Yibo didn’t know if he could trust Jessica-Ann. She was too talkative, and too young. He eventually decided that no. Gave a hum:

“You jump to conclusions. I still asked you for a dance.”

She shrugged and might have even agreed with him, but at this moment Xiao Zhan broke into their gazebo.

Wang Yibo understood right by his eyes that he was mad. Just like that time when Zhan hadn’t known if they broke up or not, after he’d told his beloved that he had been having sex with John. Xiao Zhan was bad at controlling himself.

At the sight of Zhan Jessica-Ann’s eyes glowed all over. She turned her sight from him to Yibo and then laughed loudly, having understood immediately that she was right all that time about Yibo.

Xiao Zhan who ran into their gazebo was confused himself. Having seen that Yibo and Jessica were sitting at a respectful distance from each other and were just talking, he got embarrassed because of himself, now he had to make up a reason why and for what he was here.

Yibo first got caught off guard, then got surprised, then mad but at the same time, deep in his soul, he was satisfied because he saw that Xiao Zhan was driven just by banal jealousy. It seemed pleasant. He made him jealous, he was needed and loved, he was cared about so much that it was impossible to hide.

“Brother Zhan, what are you doing here?” Yibo asked with an even tone.

It was obvious how Xiao Zhan was hurriedly thinking, how forcedly he responded him:

“We need to talk, Brother Yibo. Sorry, that I... interrupted.”

Jessica-Ann was smiling satisfyingly, all her looks shouted I told you!, but Xiao Zhan was made to step aside because of the Sister-guard who squeezed into their gazebo the fourth and instantly put hands on her hips:

“Hey, you, alphas, what are you doing here with a young lady?” and right away, “Annie, are they messing with you?”

“No,” she said, not even trying to hide her joy. “Quite opposite, I feel like a prom queen!”

“If you can’t share a girl,” the Sister decided for whatever reason, “then please, be so kind not to start a fight right in front of her!”

Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan didn’t know what to say and Jessica-Ann collected herself first:

“You’re right, Sister, I gotta go. Brothers should talk,” she stood up first and got out. “Thank you for the dance and an interesting conversation, Brother Yibo. Sorry that I didn’t finally dance with you, Brother Zhan. Please just don’t start a fight!” and, having chuckled once more, straightened her shoulders, she headed to the Female block.

“We aren’t going to fight!” Wang Yibo reassured Sister right away.

“Sorry we really have to talk,” Xiao Zhan smiled at her.

“Anything can be expected from the newbie,” the woman told him menacingly, “but I can rely on you, Brother Zhan, on your sensibility.”

“Sure,” he said. Yibo barely held himself from giving a sarcastic hum.

When the woman, finally, went away, he said:

“There’s not even a sign of sensibility here. Xiao Zhan, what did you even think about? Do you want everyone in the community to understand that we...”

“I’m sorry,” Xiao Zhan folded his hands together and pressed them between his hips. “Sung Joo had some guessings right away too, though I didn’t support either of those.”

“Brilliant!” Wang Yibo moaned, leaning back to the wooden wall of the gazebo. “Has anyone else guessed too?”

“I hope not,” he responded, looking at his own laps. “Is that what you felt when I told you about my past and John?”

“Don’t know,” Yibo said more calmly this time, “I don’t know what you’re feeling right now, Xiao Zhan.”

“As if my guts are being fried on the pan,” he just said. “As if my throat is asphyxiated, it’s difficult to breathe... It’s it jealousy?”

“Seems like one,” Wang Yibo said quietly.

“It turns out I’ve never been jealous towards anyone for my whole life,” he chuckled, not joyfully at all. “I’m sorry, I... You’ve been gone for so long, therefore I...”

“Xiao Zhan, I’m gay,” Wang Yibo said quietly and firmly to him. “Yes, I’ve never had an experience with women but I know exactly. Because I’ve never fantasized about women, because I’ve never sought their attention, they’ve never excited me. They can be wonderful friends, women are objectively beautiful, gracious, very smart, clever and strong. I respect women and I can admire them, but I don’t feel the warmth of their skin when I touch them. My blood doesn’t start boiling, my heart doesn’t start racing, I’m not excited and not aroused. These all happen when I’m with men. When I talk to them, when I contact physically... with you – even when I just look at you.”

Xiao Zhan sighed convulsively and lifted sight at Yibo. The guy was looking in respond with a light smile and went on:

“Okay, now we’re ceremoniously sitting on the different sides of the gazebo, from the side, probably, it seems that we’re just peacefully discussing something but you can’t even imagine how badly I want to kiss you right now.”

“Yibo...” Xiao Zhan exhaled, but Wang Yibo saw how Sister-guard was approaching them again.

“Lads, come to reason,” she said. “These gazebos are not for men. If you want to talk then go outside.”

“You’re right,” Xiao Zhan smiled at her and stood up first, saying to Yibo, “Let’s go, Brother Yibo, we can talk at different place.”

They went past the Assembly Hall, Xiao Zhan was winding, trying to find the most secret places, stealthily getting to somewhere. It went darker. Yibo understood they wouldn't get back to the party anymore.

“Xiao Zhan,” he called quietly. “Where you’re taking me, can I kiss you at that place?”

“I hope so,” he smiled. They came to a small detached building, Yibo had never been here before. To his own surprise, Xiao Zhan took out keys from his pocket and opened the door.

“What’s the place?”

“A rehearsing house for our choir and ensemble,” he said, lighting a candle at the threshold. “Close the door and lower the mosquito net...”

“And why have we met in the hay barn if you have such a nice place?”

“The hay barn is secluded, people rarely go there,” he said. “And here we have to go past the dining area. Laborers who work in the kitchen often stay there for long. They could probably see you or me.”

Xiao Zhan placed the candle on the floor, so there was not much light seen from the window, shut old curtains at the window. The rehearsal house looked like a usual school room, there were just less desks and chairs were put in a semi-circle around the old piano.

“We can’t go to the hay barn anymore...” Yibo said it, understanding that he was arousing just because Xiao Zhan was close to him and he could kiss him.

“Then we won’t go there so far...” Xiao Zhan told him, turning to Yibo and glowing with calling, burning sight.

They didn’t need words anymore. Yibo approached him and pressed Zhan against the wall, embracing his lips with his own. Zhan pressed him against himself too, responding to the kiss, doing it greedily, hungrily.

“Zhan...” Yibo roared him in the ear, pressing his cock against his beloved, tried to bite his neck, but the guy confusedly pulled away.

“Yibo, please... without marks.”

Even the subtle mention of John, the fact that there were limits in their intimacy because of this old prick, all those waved bitterly through Yibo’s guts. He tried not to focus on these feelings, brushing them aside. Xiao Zhan was in his arms – soft, malleable, melting, he wanted to think only about him and not about John.
Yibo’s hand appeared on Xiao Zhans buttocks, he greedily kneaded them, lightly biting men’s collarbones.

“Yibo...” Xiao Zhan was thrilled, his breath became more and more heavy, hot.

“When, Zhan? When will I finally be able to do it?”

“Soon, it won’t take long. When I fully recover, I’ll tell you, I swear...” she exhaled ardently, putting hands into Yibo’s hair. “Come to me...”

Zhan himself penetrated Yibo’s mouth with his tongue, moaned while kissing. It wasn’t comfortable in front of the wall now, and the guy pushed Yibo to chairs, taking a place between his stretched legs. He managed it with Yibo’s belt in a second, freeing his aroused cock, and Yibo was thinking just about how to hold back a shout because he knew that Xiao Zhan was really good at blow jobs and... oh, god!

“Zhan!” Yibo couldn’t restrain, when he took his cock fully. He found himself on the verge of an orgasm, what the hell…

“Come now, if you want,” Xiao Zhan told him, holding his dick at the root and just caressing the head of it with licking movements. “I’ll do it as many times as you want...”

“Oh, Holy Mother Mary...” Yibo got his cock back into his throat with one move, having a bad desire to fuck with hips. “Zhan, I’ll make it just twice...”

As if he was saying sorry, asking, but in Xiao Zhan’s eyes it was clearly seen that Wang Yibo was allowed to do everything. He didn’t see even a glimpse of refusal in his sight. Then the guy pressed Xiao Zhan’s head with his hands and made two strong, harsh, full pushes into him and after that poured deeply into his throat. He accepted those pushes and sperm with a royal calmness, almost professionally, but when Yibo exhaustedly leaned back on the chair, going through post-orgasm waves in his body, Xiao Zhan, not taking his cock from his warm mouth, undid his own fly and fast led himself to orgasm, cumming on the floor.

“I wanted to do it myself,” Yibo chided him for self-reliance, carefully taking his cock from the sweet trap of his warm lips.

Xiao Zhan didn’t say anything, just leaving hot and wet kisses on his scrotum, under it, on the pubis, under the navel. He buried nose into his pubic hair and shamelessly inhaled the musky smell mixed with sweat. It made Yibo embarrassed a little bit, he was already used to how the locals smelled, he was the same. They gave deodorant only to those who went beyond the perimeter and to the Confidants. But Xiao Zhan liked to inhale his beloved man just like that, as he was, without the admixture of side aromas. When Wang Yibo’s cock got smaller, Xiao Zhan carefully hid it back under the cotton underwear pants, zipped up his trousers.

“Zhan...” Yibo pulled him on himself, the guy sat on him, face to face. They affectionately and deeply kissed, then hugged and froze for some time, living through a sweet moment of unity.

Wang Yibo tightly embraced his waist, pressing him against himself, Xiao Zhan was fully relaxed, put a chin on his shoulder and then suddenly asked:

“Yibo... beyond the perimeter... could we dance with you in front of everyone?”

Wang Yibo smiled, stroking Xiao Zhan’s back:

“Yeah. Right outside, if we wanted. And it wouldn’t be a crime. And if it was at a gay club we could actually merge with the crowd,” the man was silently, maybe trying to imagine himself something like that. Wang Yibo added, “Moreover, Xiao Zhan... we could officially get married.”

“What?” he lifted his head and looked at Yibo with widened eyes. “Officially? Man with a man?”

“Man with a man,” Yibo smiled, imagining what kind of effect he had on Xiao Zhan’s mind now, “We could be a husband and a husband, wedding, rings – like any other couple. Samesex marriages are legal in the US.”

“Legal?” he repeated as if not believing it.

“In more than 35 states in the USA, including New Mexico,” and seeing Xiao Zhan’s state, as if he’d heard something impossible and wondrous, decided to beat him right away, “And we could have a child, Zhan. A real family. To have a child from a surrogate mother or adopt one from the orphanage.”

“Our child?” he whispered, not believing it, but his eyes were already glowing, and Wang Yibo freaking liked that glow, “Are you telling me the truth?”

“I’ve always told you only the truth,” he said. “There’re women who can deliver us a child for money. Surrogate mothers. From you, or from me. And adoption... Gay couples officially married are allowed to adopt children. Everything is possible there, Xiao Zhan, beyond the perimeter.”

“I can’t believe it... I thought...”

“... that they treat someone like us the same as in the auto-repair at Tommy Suite?” Yibo gave a hum. “No, Zhan, the world’s already made a step forward. Of course, there’re still ignorant pricks, like Tommy’s subordinates, but now it’s more of an exception. Now in the US they are strange, not us.”

Xiao Zhan was still unbelievingly smiling:

“So,” Yibo asked, stroking Zhan’s face affectionately, “Would you go with me beyond the perimeter.”

Xiao Zhan looked at him seriously in the eyes, and at this moment Yibo didn’t doubt his sincerity:

“Yes.”

Yibo happily smiled, pulled Zhan to himself and they kissed again.

“We have to find how to get out of here,” Zhan said. “I just have no idea, given that neither you nor me are let beyond the perimeter.”

“It’s not enough to just get out of here,” Wang Yibo said. “I’ve thought a lot about it. We have to have some solid evidence, Xiao Zhan. Something that federals won’t wave off. I just wanted to talk to you about it. You’ve been in the community for twenty years and... you’re John’s Confidant. What proofs of his crime could we bring with us? There should be something for all those years. Anyone, even the most paranoid person after more than thirty years will relax, start to leave trails, make mistakes... We need to procure something, any evidence that John is a perpetrator-pedofile. I’m sure, he has more sins than enough, we have to just dig...”

Xiao Zhan confusedly sagged:

“I don’t know, Yibo, don’t know... Just me, my body are the proofs of his crimes. Let them examine me, I’m ready to tell them everything, but, if you say so, this won’t be enough...”

“Just think about it, you might remember something,” Yibo asked. “And I... I want to take a risk, Zhan, to trust... Yixuan.”

“No!” the man scaredly shouted and abruptly stood up from Yibo’s laps, started to go around the room worriedly. “Don’t do it. I... I couldn’t trust him.”

“Why?” Yibo asked. “What do you know about Yixuan?”

Xiao Zhan painfully formed phrases, was going back and forth, not knowing how to say and finally answered:

“See it, maybe Yixuan is a good person, just... He’s still John’s son, his heir.”

“I know, and what?”

Xiao Zhan excruciatingly licked lips, pull up a chair to himself and sat in front of Yibo:

“I think, Yixuan is the only one from the Nightingales who hasn’t experienced what we have,” he said trustfully. “Everyone from the Nightingales suffered. To a different extent, but everyone. It was obvious when John took another our Brother for blessing and then he came back limping, quiet, with sore eyes and droopy-sight. We unmistakably understood when and with whom that thing happened. We have never discussed it between us, but we saw everything. And Yixuan... he has never had anything like that. John has never taken him to blessings... In the community they would say that why Yixuan should get filled with John’s blessing when he is his son, his flesh and blood, as if he consisted of his blessing...”

“Oh, God...”

“Yixuan was never an outcast among us, but he also didn’t have friends. He was like with us, but we all understood, felt that he was different: more happy, careless, not knowing... John’s blessings and all that terror that we went through at different times. We all treated him differently: someone couldn’t stand him, someone envied, someone wanted to suck up to him... I... I was always neutral with Yixuan. I was John’s favorite, went to his blessings more than others, and Yixuan saw that John marked me out more than him. I don’t know what Yixuan thought about me but... we’re used to staying away from each other.”

“Do you think Yixuan knows what John makes with boys at blessings?”

“I don’t know,” Xiao Zhan moved his chin, “But if he does and keeps promoting his father’s business, intending to become his successor, then he is a beast like John.”

The men fell silent, thinking each about their own thing. Suddenly Xiao Zhan collected himself, took a candle from the floor and put it to the wall clock:

“There is a curfew in three minutes, Yibo, we have to hurry and come back to our homes!”

“When are we meeting next time?” he asked, jumping from his chair and fixing his clothes.

“I don’t know but I’ll find a way to tell you,” Xiao Zhan did the same thing. “Go first, you have a longer way to go. And I’ll be a little late, my parents won’t say anything.”

Yibo quickly and strongly kissed Xiao Zhan goodbye and ran outside first.

Still Xiao Zhan’s words about Yixuan didn’t convince him. It was worth remembering that Zhan made a one-sided judgment. And he, Wang Yibo, knew him from another side, and maybe, with him there was a real Zhou Yixuan.

Chapter Text

On Monday morning Wang Yibo got up and went to his new work. And he had to admit it was “low-effort”. Ivan told him how he maintained autos and what spare parts go for what, promised to teach him how to assemble engines and so on. At some moment Wang Yibo realized he was so engaged in the process. Everything Ivan told him was interesting, he drove a car himself after all and he was no stranger to mechanics. In the evening before dinner Ron brought him his duty roster that Yibo had to hang on the wall above his bed, so that not only him but other Brothers would know and take into account what schedule he had.

That’s how he found out that he had to be on duty on the tower already this week, and also to go on patrol as well, together with Sung Joo and Romeo who’d recently got married. All of those were awaiting him closer to the end of the week. And already on Tuesday after work Yixuan came to him and, being even a little shy, offered to talk. Yibo accepted that calmly because the fact he Became a brother didn’t mean that Yixuan quit being his mentor. Their relationship had to ideally last until the end of their lives.

Yibo was surprised by another thing, that Yixuan led him to the library and then offered by himself:

“Do you remember, Yibo, how we played checkers once? I’d like to use this question game once again to talk to you.”

The guy alerted. He smiled politely at his mentor and said:

“Of course, I do. And I also remember you told me we don’t need the game to speak openly. What’s changed?”

“That’s how I can be sure you’ll ask my questions honestly,” Yixuan responded and Yibo’s gut twitched in a bad feeling, he also got stinged by the guilt: oh, poor Yixuan, he’s more honorable than Yibo. He thought that if a person promised something then he wouldn’t lie. He thought of Yibo better than he actually was.

“Yixuan...” Yibo dragged, stretching the corner of his lips, “I’ll ask you questions too. Aren’t you afraid that... that you won’t like them?”

Yixuan cast a dark sight at him, put hand behind his back:

“I am. But I won’t have mercy either.”

Well... Yibo himself wanted to talk to Yixuan. In more comfortable circumstances, for sure, but if Yixuan wanted that himself…

They entered the library and closed the door, Yibo took out the checkers and started to place them on the board.

“Yixuan, do you know that I play checkers better than you...”

“I’m not afraid to lose,” he responded, sitting down in front of him, “I just need you to answer a couple of my questions honestly.”

Hm... Yibo might do it like that today. He didn’t know where this game was going to lead them, didn’t know if he was going to lie to Yixuan, looking him in the eyes but he said just in case:

“Rules are the same: the one who takes a checker gets a right to ask. The answer is totally honest. Everything that is discussed over the game of checkers isn’t conveyed to anyone else.”

Yixuan nodded and, as long as he was at the side of whites, he made the first step. The game started. The whole first ten steps were without any loss, Yixuan surely took into account his previous experience of playing with Yibo and remembered his tactics. But still the first checker taken from the board was white, and Yibo smiled at Yixuan, having decided not to waste time, he still had so much to discuss with his mentor:

“On Sunday I got to know Jessica-Ann closer,” he started.

“Oh, yes. The whole community’s been talking about how you got stuck in the gazebo till the curfew.”

“Yes, she’s a really interesting girl, we managed to talk about a lot of stuff,” Yibo nodded and squinted. “For example about the fact she didn’t know her parents are looking for her, she hasn’t talked to them since she came to the community and that, as it turned out, they aren’t against her presence here.”

Yixuan’s facial expression changed: absent-mindedness turned into an outrageous surprise, and Yibo within himself decided that he didn’t know about it. Who did he talk with about Jessica-Ann then? With John? With Sister Ursula? Did he just trust their words easily? Or did he just want to believe it because it was comfortable, that’s how they did in the community so far?

“Hm... most likely, Annie’s mentor, or someone from the Confidants reached her parents without her knowing...” he tried to justify it, “I don’t think that an underage would be kept here by force...”

“...not if she’s pregnant because of one of the locals,” Yibo said.

Yixuan twitched, lifted a mad sight at Yibo.

“It’s absolutely prohibited by the rules of the Community, Yibo, and you know it!” by his nervous tone the guy guessed that Yixuan himself had probably thought about it many times, “Relationships with a woman beyond the perimeter, and with an underage one... it’s a crime according to the rules of the USA, not to mention us! No one would resolve to do it! She’s come to us already like that, the Community accepted her out of mercy, because she cried and asked! We pitied her, we didn’t steal her, and, I’m sure, aren’t keeping her here by force!”

Yixuan went too far. Yibo was looking at him calmly but his sight was going heavier, and he asked a question that was also hard:

“Well, my first question, Yixuan: do you believe yourself in what you have just said?”

Yixuan’s eyes widened, he even went red out of indignation, but Yibo didn’t need to convince his mentor today. He understood that it was impossible to do in just two hours of conversation. It was enough to just embarrass him, to throw a rod, to give him soil and to plant a seed of doubt there. And let it grow, multiply, like a weed. And Yibo would wait.

“Well, let’s think that was a rhetorical question,” he retreated quickly. “You don’t have to answer. Your turn.”

Still overwhelmed with emotions Yixuan killed two black checkers of Yibo at once. He was waiting for questions from his mentor. Yixuan didn’t hurry, he needed to calm down. So he first slowly unbuttoned his shirt cuffs, freeing wrists from the trap, and then asked his first question:

“Why did you come to the community, Yibo?”

He even leaned back on the chair out of disappointment. He’d expected more from Yixuan:

“I’ve said that a hundred times.”

“And maybe you’ve lied a hundred times!” he raised his voice so that Yibo even collected himself, alerted. He’d never seen Yixuan in such a rightful anger, “You don’t like being here, Yibo. Sometimes so much that you aren’t even able to hide your displeasure!”

“Are you talking about that case with Lia and Charlotte?”

“Not only,” Yixuan was speaking through his teeth and Yibo understood that the guy had been keeping all of that within himself for a long time. “Do you think I’m your mentor only for the words? Do you think I don’t give weight to this? To watch you, to try to grasp the essence of your ward – that is what mentorship is! You’re smart, sly and... lying. And I don’t get what you're doing here?”

Well, there was going to be a lie. He had to forgive himself some time later, but at this moment Yibo leaned to Yixuan and answered in his tone:

“I’ve come here because I was a fool without a life goal. And I’ve stayed here because people around me needed help! And I hope I will help a lot of people here.”

“Then there’s my next question,” Yixuan leaned to him too and their faces got close to each other, “And you, Wang Yibo, do you believe in what you’re telling me?”

Yibo even froze a little, winked two times, and said sincerely:

“I do,” and added, “after all, your father asked me the same thing.”

“What?” the man didn’t really expect to hear something like that.

To which Yibo answered him, realizing, he was a real prick:

“That’s my turn, Yixuan,” and then he took away one of his white checkers.

Yixuan leaned back on the chair, gritting teeth. Yibo made him angry again, the guy saw it, he just needed to understand if Yixuan liked that or not.

But before the next question Yibo was thinking, biting lips and then asked really carefully:

“Have you ever had a thought that... your father is actually... afraid of you?”

He even pitied Yixuan just a little: Yibo saw how he was swayed by different polar emotions, from confusion to anger, and then to surprise and shock. The man didn’t seem to expect their another conversation over the game of checkers to be so emotional. He had hardly ever had any conversations like that in his life.

“I don’t get you,” he said through his teeth. “How come that my father can be afraid of me?”

The tone of his voice was unfriendly but Yibo still decided to explain as politely as possible:

“When I talked to John... I had a feeling that he, officially of course, supports you as his Heir and Successor but in fact...” Yibo sighed out, choosing words, “He looks like an old king who’s scared his death won’t happen in bed but he’ll die by the hand of his own heir through some conspiracy.”

Yixuan looked at Yibo for a long time, then lowered his eyes and was silent, obviously struggling with his emotions and thoughts. He felt stuffy, he unbuttoned the collar of his shirt, cleared his throat:

“I should answer your question... Hm... I’ll be honest. Yes, Yibo,” he said, not lifting his sight from the table. “Sometimes it seems to me my father subconsciously really holds on tight to his power. But I’ve never thought he’s afraid of me.”

“In vain,” Yibo responded quietly, “Give it a thought.”

Yixuan silently made the next move, Yibo – his own, seven empty steps but, eventually, Yibo killed two Yixuan’s checkers again and became “a king”. The man hummed mirthlessly:

“You asked me if I was afraid of your questions... now I really am, Wang Yibo. To tell the truth I wasn’t ready for it.”

“You lose focus because of emotions,” he responded calmly. “Well, two questions of mine...”

He needed to give Yixuan a break. Otherwise he would lose his temper. So the guy decided to ask something meaningless:

“You told me you work with your father in the community but we’ve never talked about your work. What exactly do you do in the community?”

He even sighed in relief:

“I mostly work with the accountancy of our community. Figures, accounts, estimates, supplies... It’s enough to do every day.”

Interesting. Yibo looked at his mentor, tilted his head to the side and asked a question that had already come to his mind before but he had barely had a chance to ask:

“What money do we live on, Yixuan? As far as I understood, the community doesn’t produce anything: we don’t agriculture, don’t work at some secret factory, yeah we live well, even despite the old clothes and the same cheap shampoo for everyone. We built new houses, cook hundreds of kilograms of various foods... Sustaining the community can be a really really expensive campaign, no one knows it better than you since you’re busy with accountancy. But what budget do we live on?”

Yixuan blushed painfully. He rubbed his neck, obviously choosing words, then said:

“We have a lot of... donations.”

“From community members?” Yibo clarified. “Like Ron who sold his house and gave John all his money away?”

“It’s just a small part,” he said carefully. “Father has a lot of fans from all over the world, a lot of contacts, various donations flow to us in different sums and sometimes they are with more than six zeros, Yibo. He has friends everywhere and some of them send us cheques on a regular basis.”

The guy sighed. The answer seemed more than simple and convincing but Yibo saw and felt that was not the whole truth. As if Yixuan was concealing something, but what? In any case that guy understood he wouldn’t be able to get to it right now. The man wasn’t yet ready for the more open conversation, he would just get angry.

They made three more steps and Yibo killed the checker of his mentor again making his another checker “a king”. The situation was already clear: Yixuan was losing, he didn’t have many steps left. The game now looked like a slow killing of Yixuan as a player. Yibo saw that he was frustrated and sad. The mentor hadn’t really expected he would lose so fast so that he didn’t have a chance to ask all the questions he wanted. Yibo said peacefully:

“At first I wanted to ask you if you saw all the imperfections of the community yourself but then I understood that you do, you can’t not see, you’re not a fool. Then my question is: what do you think? I mean, what do you feel understanding that you’re the heir of the community far from being perfect. That you’ll inherit an organization with rules not perfect at all, with harsh laws and discrimination? That you’ll get on your hands miserable people with ruined lives? And the one who ruined them was your father with his ideology? What’s your life like with all that?”

Yixuan hummed, crossing arms on his chest. He was gritting his teeth and looking at the checker’s board with a sad and lost sight. He answered after being silent for some moment:

“There is... a fire of truth in your words, Yibo... as if you came from the ideal world where there’s no unfairness, meanness and personal interests instead of the law... Let me remind you that there’re people who come for a better life to us, they seek for Salvation! Course, our Community is not perfect, and my father is not perfect either but I’m sure he is doing everything he can. And me, Yibo... I’ll do everything that I could. That’s it. Do you think I don’t feel the same? Do you think I didn’t want to stand for Lia back then? I did. But she came here and stayed, knowing our laws. And I know them, everyone does! She was punished according to our laws and I can’t fix it. At least, now. You give mercy for one, then for another one and what’ll remain from the discipline, from the order? Do you think it’s simple and not hurtful to be a leader?”

Yibo had a lot to say to Yixuan in response. For example, that he had no quibbles with the community if John himself wasn’t the main problem of his community. Yixuan just respected his father and didn’t know much about him. Yibo still wanted to believe he didn’t. For real, the Community “Children of Salvation” could be prosperous and peaceful if not for the rapist-pedofile at the source of the foundation.

Then it was more like a blood massacre: having taken two steps, Yixuan could do nothing but put his white checker so that Yibo got the opportunity to take it away. The guy asked quietly:

“Are you going to change anything when you become the leader of the community?”

Yixuan was sitting, pursing his lips tightly, but responded to Yibo shortly:

“I am. I dream of changing a lot of things here.”

The guy nodded and the game went on. This time the situation was different: three steps and Yibo had to expose himself to the attack because he had no steps anymore, even with his kings. Yixuan sighed mirthlessly:

“You told me father’d asked you to care about people in the community, and your notices that he’s like afraid of me or something... You talked to him just once, at the blessing before the Initiation. Tell me about your conversation,” he asked.

Yibo lifted a brow:
“Isn’t it a Sacrament? Shouldn’t we keep everything that’s happening at blessings a secret?”

Yixuan’s request was bold, moreover against the law, equivalent to asking a priest to reveal the sacrament of confession.” The men want shamefully blushing, lowered his sight and mumbled in response:

“That’s why I ask you over the game. It’ll stay between us.”

Yibo smiled and told Yixuan everything as it was, without any regrets. He especially focused on his own thoughts, because he had an idea that John was afraid of his son. Yixuan was listening silently, didn’t interrupt, just casting a sharp eye at Yibo sometimes. When Yibo finished, the mentor didn’t comment on what he’d heard, just gestured to Yibo that they could keep on playing. Yibo took away the checker of his rival right with the next step.

In fact, he had another topic to speak about. The one that he was really afraid to raise. Because Yixuan’s reaction could be any, unpredictable. Yibo slowed down, fiddled with “killed” checker in his fingers, sighed deeply and then resolved:

“I heard some rumors... whispers about... Nightingales,” he looked searchingly at his mentor, but the man couldn’t yet understand what his ward was talking about. “As if John at his blessings... hm...” Yibo’s ears went painfully red, he was afraid to look at Yixuan but continued, “that he’s busy with children... hm... not only talking.”

Yixuan jumped from his place. His eyes were burning with such a fire, outrage, insult, that Yibo was afraid to look. The mentor nervously pulled the collar of his unbuttoned shirt, as though it was difficult for him to catch a breath, his lips were burning and he spat on Yibo hissingly:

“Who told you?!”

Yibo swallowed hard, not being able to avert his sight from the fearful eyes of his mentor, responded like a scared puppy:

“I won’t tell you. It’s not important.”

“Who?!” Yixuan roared at him for the first time of their relationship. “This is a vile and dirty slander, such a heresy, nonsense, lie, I can’t...”

“It means you’ve already heard about it?” Yibo took a risk.

Yixuan’s mouth twitched out of nervousness:

“I have and I can’t imagine who can say such a thing about their own leader and innocent children! Terrible! Who have you heard it from?”

“I won’t tell you!”

“Did Sung Joo tell you about it? He talks too much, goes around the community and gathers rumors...”

“I won’t tell you, Yixuan.”

“Who, Yibo? Xiao Zhan? You’ve made close friends so far...”

“Yixuan, stop it...”

“It’s your mentor’s order!” he broke into a cry. “I order you to tell me! There’s rot in the community, who makes the whole Society decay! Tell, who! Now!”

“First take away one of my checkers at least, then I will!” Yibo challenged him.
Yixuan feverishly looked at the board, his eyes were constantly moving, calculating the next move, but a fool could see that he didn’t have any good steps anymore. He could just put his checkers under attack, but he couldn’t hurt his rival. Having understood it, Yixuan swept the board off the table. It fell on the floor with a crash, the remaining checkers scattered in all directions. Yixuan was really mad and breathed heavily. Yibo even admitted the idea he could throw himself at him at any moment. But he still said:

“There’s one person who can tell you the truth.”

The mentor looked at him sideways, Yibo clarified:

“Seung Yeon. He’s the only doctor in the community. If the boys really go through something bad, he should be aware.”

Yixuan didn’t say anything to Yibo and left the library without words. Yibo felt he was all sweaty after this word fight. Exhausted badly, he came back to the House of Brothers.

Zhou Yixuan knocked quietly and, having waited until the response, came into the medical post. It was late evening already, the curfew was soon, Seung Yeon was sitting at his desk near the turned on lamp.

“Yixuan?” he asked with surprise, lifting his head, “Unexpectedly. Did anything happen?” Do you feel sick?”

Yixuan stood, putting his hands into pockets, shrugged:

“Was passing by, saw that you have lights on... Decided to come by. Why are you still working?”

“I’m going to your father with a report tomorrow,” he answered, still a little surprised. “And why are you not at home?”

“Seung Yeon...” Yixuan painfully bit lips and didn't know how to ask. “I heard some rumors... Disgusting rumors, dirty. But it torments me. And I decided to ask. You can know.”

Cold expression on Seung Yeon’s face didn’t change. He blinked and asked calmly:

“What do you want to ask?”

It was difficult for Yixuan to say it out loud. The words got stuck in his throat. He wanted to forget everything and calmly go home. But he couldn’t. He knew he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep. Therefore he asked, feeling as he was burning inside:

“The rumors that father... doesn’t behave well with Nightingales.”

Seung Yeon didn’t react here either. He might have already heard it. Yixuan decided to clarify:

“I don’t believe it myself but I thought if something like that can take place then... you should know. You’re a doctor. They would ask you for help.”

Seung Yeon’s face expression became thoughtfull for a moment, as if he was choosing either to tell or not, but then he came back to his calmness, like Buddha, and said:

“I’ve not noticed anything like that. Children here grow up healthy and rarely ask me for help.”

Yixuan breathed out with relief. Seung Yeon added:

“You’re right, if there was some violence towards children I would know. But no, Yixuan, nothing like that. Just some dirty rumors.”

Yixuan smiled and looked at his friend with appreciation:

“Thank you. Now I can sleep with a light heart. Thank you, Seung Yeon.”

“My pleasure,” he answered and gave him a light, translucent smile, “It’s too late, Yixuan. We should both go back home. Good night.”

“Good night, Seung Yeon.”

And then the guy left the medical post. Seung Yeon was looking at the door for some time, then silently went to take off his white robe. Yixuan went outside but, having made several steps, stopped and looked at the lighted windows of the medical post, thinking about something of his own.

Chapter Text

On Wednesday, when Yibo was heading to the communal dining, he quite accidentally ran into Xiao Zhan on the street. This unplanned meeting worked in favor of Yibo. They beamed smiles and openly approached each other, shaking hands:

“Brother Zhan!”

“Brother Yibo...”

“I’m going to have lunch,” Yibo looked around shortly just to make sure no one was listening to them.

“And my rehearsal’s about to start,” the man smiled. “Children’ve already had meal so...”

“Can we meet today’s evening?” Yibo whispered to him fast. “I’ve some news.”

Zhan’s face changed, got more intense-nervous, he vaguely moved his chin:

“I can’t say for now... Has anything happened?”

“I talked to Yixuan yesterday.”

“Yibo!”

“I’ll tell you in the evening. Can you?”

Xiao Zhan shortly looked around too:

“How about this: come to the rehearsal house today after the curfew. If the curtains are closed – so I’m waiting for you. If not – go back to the House of Brothers.”

“Ok, deal,” Yibo regretted just one thing at that moment, that he couldn’t kiss Zhan here and now.

“Just, please, Yibo, be careful and stay out of anyone’s sight,” Zhan asked at last.

Yixuan had never considered himself a curious person. He was raised as an example to follow, an exemplary member of the Brotherhood, the Heir and a future leader. He was told since his childhood that curiosity is a vice, and he suppressed any flashes of it within him. But those, of course, took place: why hadn’t father ever called him for blessings? Why didn't the lads want to come to these blessings? Why did they avoid him though he never started a quarrel with anyone? Of course, he himself found some reasonable explanations: the guys didn’t like the blessings just because the father was telling them off there for their sins. And never called Yixuan because he was a good boy and behaved better than the others, he tried so hard so far. And he spent so much time with his dad, and his dad still had to find time for others. He had to share his father – that’s what Yixuan understood the moment he came to the community. Therefore he tried to be an exemplary son, to behave well and not to ask more questions.

Yixuan got new information to chew on when he got engaged in the community’s business. Here a fool could see that the Community had so much spendings and the donations on their account weren’t enough to cover them all... The guy understood abruptly that his father had off-the-book records. A separate folder only he himself worked with. Yixuan knew even where all that was stored – into his desk where all the drawers were under the key. Yixuan was close to his father but even he saw that John had secrets from him. Something he discussed only with Victor, for example, one-to-one, half-whispering behind the closed door. Something his father kept silent about and something he didn’t tell even the mother. And Yixuan suppressed that curiosity every time. Because he knew: sooner or later the secrets would be revealed anyway, because he was his father’s heir. He would still find out everything, he just had to be patient.

But he couldn’t be patient this time.

When Seung Yeon went up to John to his study with the report Yixuan waved a hand at him in the living room and pretended to read the newspaper further. But had the door upstairs barely closed, he without a hesitation followed them and proceeded to shamelessly eavesdrop on them. Father had a wonderful soundproofing in his room, massive oak doors, Yixuan could barely hear anything. So he collected his courage and smoothly lowered the handle down, hoping with all his heart that being busy with their conversation men wouldn’t notice that. The guy opened the door just a bit but he started to distinguish some words at least.

Seung Yeon was reporting his father about the heaviest cases of the community people, was talking about some Sister:

“I suspect she had cancer, John. But, of course, I’m not an oncologist, I can’t say for sure. She has to go to Las Cruces to see a doctor for an examination. Will you pay for her treatment if anything?”

Father’s heavy sigh:

“That’s all I need...”

Then they started to discuss other people, they didn’t talk about children. But at the end Seung Yeon suddenly said:

“By the way, your son surprisingly came to me yesterday...”

Yixuan’s heart sank down, he understood that he didn’t get stuck at this door in vain for more than fifteen minutes.

“Hm? Has anything happened to him?” John was interested.

“No, he wanted to talk,” Seung Yeon answered. “He questioned me about the rumors...” silence, and then the guy clarified, “about boys.”

“Damn...” John’s voice was annoyed. “Does he know anything concrete?”

“No, he asked in general...”

“What did you tell him?”

“As I should have: that I don’t know anything and never witnessed any incidents...”

“Good,” a sound of patting a shoulder. “I’m glad I can rely on you, Seung Yeon.”

“You always can,” there was a smile in the guy's voice.

And then... something happened. Something Yixuan hadn’t expected to hear: he heard... a kissing sound?! When two people touch each other with their lips – that was his first association with the strange smooches. Yixuan was startled, in total stupor, he didn’t see what was happening in the study and couldn’t believe the images his imagination was drawing him.

In a great fear the guy dashed off from the father’s study, trying not to make any noise, downstairs and to another wing of the house where his mother and he lived. His heart was hammering hollowly in his chest, he couldn’t calm down and was thinking and thinking about what he’d heard.

On Wednesday after the curfew Yibo snuck through the bathroom window and went in the direction of the rehearsing house. His path went across the very center of the community, and he understood why Xiao Zhan didn’t want to meet there earlier. The signal to sleep had already been given and there was no one outside, Wang Yibo was nervous though, as if Brothers and Sisters eyed him from every window, as if his violation was in plain sight. He came past the dining especially carefully. There was a light in the building: most probably the laborers were cooking and laying tables for breakfast in advance.

The guy went along the wall and, having shot a glance at the rehearsal house, saw that the curtains were closed. Having appeared at the door in four little runs, Yibo came inside:

“Xiao Zhan?”

The man was behind the door and jumped at him from the corner, abruptly leaning to Yibo’s lips in a sweet kiss. Yibo reciprocated the kiss though couldn’t hold back the rebuke:

“Fool, you’ve scared the crap out of me.”

“Yibo...” Zhan was really affectionate, not to say playful, purring into his ear. “Why is it never enough of you for me?”

“Zhan...” It was difficult for Yibo to resist his pressure but he still found courage to say: “I talked to Yixuan yesterday...”

Xiao Zhan peeled off of him with a disappointed moan, came into the room and sat on one of the chairs:

“You didn’t listen to what I said...”

“I believe in Yixuan,” Yibo replied. “It seems to me if he knew the truth about his father...”

“Do you think he doesn’t?” Xiao Zhan asked sharply.

“I don’t think so,” Yibo answered softly, “I think Yixuan can benefit us if he takes our side.”

And Yibo retold Xiao Zhan the whole yesterday’s conversation with Yixuan. At the end Xiao Zhan arched brows:

“You sent him to Seun Yeon?! Why? Did you think Seung Yeon would tell him the truth?”

Yibo vaguely shrugged, Xiao Zhan continued:

“Seung Yeon wouldn’t, John surely has ordered him directly to do it. And he himself...” Xiao Zhan cut himself and lowered his head, Yibo clarified, interested:

“What is he himself?”

Xiao Zhan sighed:

“Listen, I grew up next to Seung Yeon but I barely know what’s going on in his head. However...” it seemed it was uncomfortable for Xiao Zhan to talk about it, “since the very childhood he kinda... uhm... have competed with me.”

“What?” Yibo didn’t understand at first, thinking that it was something about the choir or something like that but then it dawned on him. “Competed... for John's attention?”

“Yes,” Xiao Zhan said, “as though... he was jealous of me.”

Yibo carefully sat near Xiao Zhan, silently awaiting the continuation. The guy understood that and said:

“Do you remember I told you about the case with the snake from my childhood? The one John threw off the perimeter with his bare hands? That’s when he saved Seung Yeon... it seems to me Seung Yeon fell in love with him at that moment. Sometimes John... told me about other lads. Someone succumbed to his molestation, someone didn’t... He always marked out me and... Seung Yeon. Both of us. As for me, it always felt like a personal grief but Seung Yeon... he was kinda proud of it. Oh...” Xiao Zhan sighed heavily, running hands over his face, “I have no idea what’s going on in his head. I know just that John told him to keep silent and I don’t think this silence burdens him very much...”

Yibo affectionately touched Zhan’s hand and said:

“Even if Seung Yeon doesn’t tell Yixuan anything, Yixuan will still get suspicious. He’s not a fool, he will reach it by himself when he opens his eyes. The one who looks just can’t miss who John really is. And can you imagine how he would help us with compromising materials if he picked our side?”

“Did you get ideas on how we can escape?”

Here Yibo pondered. He had no ideas. To drive beyond the perimeter and leave the car there was not an option. They would catch them like that Sister Zhan had told him about. It would be great to enlist some support from his friends in Anthony so they would run as far as they could from El Rescate, somewhere to the north where John’s influence was not so strong. But how could they do it? He wasn’t even able to call Sam or Pablo in the store because he was sure Isaack was listening to his talks. And maybe his SIM card was on the wire, who knew how far John's maniac control had gone?

“Don’t know... We might dig under the wall?”

Till the end of their date both guys were discussing possible options of escape. Brainstormed everything from their heads, even the craziest ideas and five minutes till midnight finally separated.

When Yibo was getting back from Xiao Zhan he was moving in his usual little runs from one dark corner to another. And when just a little was left till the House of Brothers, going around the corner the guy bumped into... Lia.

He didn’t recognize her right away because Lia was just in her underwear – white cotton bra and high-waist pantaloons but that didn’t strike him as much as the fact she was fully smeared with soil.

Yibo’s heart sunk down, Lia and him were looking at each other warily, trying to understand if someone was going to take any measures. At the same time they understood that they both were caught, became involuntary witnesses of each other’s crimes. After several second of stupor and silence Lia said first:

“You’ve not seen me, I’ve not seen you.”

Yibo nodded at her and they separated but in just a moment Lia called him:

“Wang Yibo!”

He looked back: Lia was standing in a shadow, he didn’t see her face, just a silhouette.

“Thank you,” she told him and the guy understood that it was not just about his readiness to keep silent but for the previous time when he was the only one who stood for her.

“Don’t give up,” he told her and they both dissolved in the night.

On Thursday after work there was his first watch: after dinner one of the Brothers (he later found out it was Seung Yeon’s father who was busy with the timetable of male services), took him to the tower where he had to spend all night till the morning.

Yibo had expected that to be really long, dull and boring. For real, what was a probability percentage that someone would decide to break through their main gates just at the night of his watch? Almost equals to zero. But, having come to the tower, which accommodated two rooms linked to each other with a spiral staircase, he saw that at the window of the second floor on the tripod there was placed the real rifle with an optical sight!

“What the heck is that?” Yibo even got startled.

Mr. Cho explained to him:

“That’s for the ones who will try to sneak in here,” he looked the guy into eyes, “or will try to escape.”

“What?” Yibo didn’t want to believe what he’d heard. “I won’t even touch this stuff! I can’t even shoot!”

“There’s just one order at this service – not to let strangers in and not let out ones who will try to go away on their own, without a pass. You are at the night watch so they can go with a pass only in the case of an emergency. No one forces you to shoot people. In case some adventure seeker starts to break into or some journalist first you should press CALL,” Mr. Cho showed him a red button on the wall. The signal will come to John and he will send a negotiator first. If it doesn’t help you start shooting the earth, under his feet. Usually that all ends up here. Hooligans get scared and run away.”

“And what if it doesn’t work?” Yibo didn’t like all of it and frowned more and more.

“That never happened.”

“No, you should have some instructions in case it won’t work, don’t you?” Yibo questioned.

Mr. Cho unpleasantly replied:

“If someone starts to break down the gates or props a ladder to the wall to sneak in then you have the right to shoot him, even according to the U.S. laws. That’s trespassing on private property.”

Yibo gulped. He was sure Mr. Cho exaggerated that a lot, if not confused facts. Anyway, any lawyer could argue with him. And the man, seeing the guy’s hesitation, added hastily:

“Of course I don’t mean kill. I meant to neutralize him. Injure his shoulder or leg, for instance.”

As if it makes it easier, thought Yibo.

“Don’t think about it too much,” Mr. Cho felt uneasy himself, patted Yibo’s shoulder. “Night watch it boring as hell. Your main task now is not to fall asleep. By the way, there’s coffee on the first floor, if anything...”

When Mr. Cho went away, Yibo explored unhurriedly two rooms, looked at the community from the tower and, not being able to hold back his curiosity, looked beyond the perimeter from the rifle scope. He had no idea what to busy himself with, found in the bins of the tower some old journals that were full of pornographic stories with vulgar photos of naked ladies. Covers of those journals were boring and didn’t match the contents. Well, high level conspiration... Some pages were worn out to almost holes. So that’s what boys were busy with at the night watch? Yibo scoffed when he suddenly heard behind his back:

“Well, well, well! Had little brother Yibo barely been left alone, he started to scrutinize naked women!”

Yibo twitched and rolled his eyes, turning back:

“Sung Joo, damn, you scared me...”

“Tell me, were you about to sin here a little all alone?”

“I wasn’t... I just found these journals,” Yibo somehow felt stupidly ashamed. “I have no idea how come they are even here...”

“How? I’ve brought them here!” the guy chuckled and freed an old chair for himself from under some rubbish, moving it closer to the window. “Made some stash for myself but I don’t mind if someone else takes it. I’m a generous man! The one who finds it – good job!”

Yibo laughed and hid the journals back:

“What are you doing here?”

“Decided to drop in on my new friend, to chatter,” Sung Joo stretched his legs and threw his feet on a frame of the opened window.

“We’re having a shared watch tomorrow,” Yibo reminded him, “We’ll talk yet.”

“Na-ah, Romeo’s joining us tomorrow... He’s a normal guy but I wanted to talk to you privately,” Sung Joo didn’t look at his friend, only forward, beyond the perimeter, but Yibo felt that the guy was keeping all his attention on him.

“Ok, well...” Yibo moved a chair for himself and sat near him, looking at the horizon too, “Start.”

“Yibo, tell me, what do they say beyond the perimeter about... pederasts?”

At moments like that in films people usually pathetically choke on something. Yibo surely hadn’t expected a question like that and looked at Sung Joo with excitement:

“Well... depends on the place...”

“Well, in the U.S.,” Sung Joo shrugged.

“Ok... it’s normal,” Yibo didn’t understand what the guy wanted to hear and why he even asked him questions like that, “It’s not a disease or something criminal, if anything. And... with each year... sexual minorities are getting more rights... Of course there’re still people though who don’t like gays, someone who treat badly... those who are different from the majority.”

“And you?”

“What me?”

“How do you treat them?”

Yibo was feverishly gathering his thoughts and then he got it: exactly, on Sunday Sung Joo guessed about Xiao Zhan’s feelings! Was he trying to taste the waters now? Why? Was he trying to do it for his friend or was it just a simple curiosity?

“Me? Hm... well... It’s alright. Why are you asking?”

“Well...” Sung Joo wasn’t still looking at him and was slightly shy. “What if, for example, you found out that someone like that... a gay person, hm... fell in love with you... What would you think about that?”

Wang Yibo literally wanted to laugh as hell but he tried to stay reserved. However, a chance to tease Sung Joo was beyond his strength and, slightly turning to his friend, he asked in a low whisper:

“Sung Joo, aren’t you... asking for yourself?”

“What?!” the guy jumped and Yibo burst into laughter, “Are you mad?! I’m still okay!”

Yibo laughed and exhaled, wiping off his tears:

“I’d understand it,” he said more seriously now. “I’m not meaning that I’m such a precious person, I just... wouldn’t judge, that’s it. I would keep it secret, of course.”

Sung Joo slightly smiled at him:

“That’s good.”

“So why did you ask me about it?” Yibo looked Sung Joo directly in the eyes. Was he going to crack or not? Would he spill his guess about Xiao Zhan or…

“I, uh...” Sung Joo scratched the back of his head but he didn’t have a chance to answer. They heard how someone came into the tower, went up the spiral ladder and then they saw Xiao Zhan himself with a coffee pot.

An awkward silence hung among the three guys. They exchanged glances not knowing what to say. Yibo collected himself first:

“Brother Zhan, what are you doing here?”

“Me?” he blushed and lifted a pot in his hands, “I learned that you’re having a night watch today, Brother Yibo, so I decided to support you and here... I made coffee.”

It seemed, Sung Joo decided to “save” Xiao Zhan in the awkward situation and falsely laughed:

“Oh, these Confidants! Brother Zhan is free from the night watch therefore he doesn’t know that there’s always some coffee here.”

“Really?” Xiao Zhan went red and got completely embarrassed.

“Yes,” Yibo nodded at him. “But if you want you can sit with us until the curfew, we all can have a talk.”
“Oh, no-no-no!” Sung Joo backed away to the ladder, “It wasn’t my plan to get stuck here until the curfew, Yibo! You can stay and I’ll go, I still have a lot of jobs to do...”

Had the guys barely had the chance to tell him anything, he was away.

Xiao Zhan looked at Yibo questioningly:

“What was Sung Joo doing here?”

“Came to ask my opinion on gays,” Yibo hummed and Xiao Zhan burst into laugh too:

“He’s so cute sometimes, right?” Xiao Zhan put the coffee pot on a little table in the corner and pinned Yibo against the wall, immediately kissing him strongly, deeply, with all the passion.

Yibo momentarily melted but it was dangerous therefore he involuntarily pulled away first:

“What’re you doing... anyone can come here at any moment...”

“So be it,” Zhan’s hand slipped to his crotch and sweetly squeezed it, “Coffee pot is my ideal excuse...”

“Yeah, and how are you going to explain our boners?” Yibo ribbed a little against his hand but then pulled away with a sigh, “I don’t think your coffee is so good though...”

“Then I’ll come back to you after the curfew,” Xiao Zhan claimed and went downstairs to find some mugs.

When he came back with two glasses Wang Yibo told him:

“It seems I came up with an interesting plan on how to escape from here.”

“I’m all ears,” Xiao Zhan poured coffee for them.

“Just the two of us can’t do it, anyway. We need a third someone.”

“Who? Sung Joo?”

“No,” Yibo sighed because he knew that Xiao Zhan wasn’t going to appreciate the idea, ”Seung Yeon.”

“What?” you see it, you see it...

Of course, Xiao Zhan didn’t like Yibo’s plan.

“That’s absolute bullshit,” he said categorically. “No way in hell am I going to trust Cho Seung Yeon.”

Even though he understood that what Yibo had offered him really looked like a plan.

Xiao Zhan left Yibo angry, annoyed. But he still came back after the curfew, as he had promised, and the second time he brought a thick duvet with him.

“What’s it for?” Yibo asked, “Do you think I’m going to get cold here?”

“Sure not,” Xiao Zhan smiled and spread it out right on the floor of the tower. “I won’t let you get cold.”

He pulled Yibo toward himself and they both lay on the duvet. It was tough and uncomfortable but those were trivialities. Wang Yibo still subconsciously worried that the tower wasn’t closed and someone could appear at any moment. But still all decent community citizens were meant to sleep so he hoped that all of them were in their homes already. That was a risk but weren’t their relationships with Xiao Zhan absolutely one huge risk?

Wang Yibo let his beloved to undress him. He freed some part of his body – and immediately covered it with kisses, and Yibo periodically lifted his head to himself to kiss him back. Having reached pants, Xiao Zhan rubbed his face against the crotch, closing eyes, and Yibo thought that Zhan was probably a fetishist but he liked that. Yibo liked everything that was between them. Just between them. When Xiao Zhan slightly lowered his pants, Yibo said hurriedly:

“I also want to caress you.”

Zhan smiled:

“Sure but first you should come.”

And he started to lick Yibo dog-like, with long strokes of his tongue, as if his cock was the best candy in the world. Yibo couldn’t resist Xiao Zhan any longer, he was too experienced. He just half-closed his eyes and relaxed, giving himself to the feelings. Xiao Zhan stroked him with a hand, sucked the tip of his cock, took him deeply, and Yibo felt how it touched his lover’s throat, saw how the man’s adam’s apple jerked each time, listened to those wonderful smacking, vulgar sucking sounds – and enjoyed. He felt so good that he didn’t even notice that he was able to endure more than usual two minutes, that Xiao Zhan was working with his dick longer. But had Xiao Zhan barely buried his nose into his pubic hair, there it was, orgasm, right here. But this time Yibo unhurriedly stroked his beloved’s hair and whispered in the quiet of the night:

“I’m going to come, Zhan.”

The man just hummed in agreement, setting off from his throat pleasant vibrations over Yibo’s dick, and the guy couldn't bear it anymore, spilling it all into Xiao Zhan, into the very deep of his throat. The man swallowed, not letting his cock free and was calmly lying with it in his mouth for some more time, stroking Yibo’s stomach and hips. He moved and let Yibo free only when his dick started to get smaller.

A wave of some absorbing gentleness captured Yibo. He kissed Xiao Zhan deeply, feeling the taste of his own sperm on his tongue, and then turned the guy under himself, unbuttoning his shirt and trousers as well.

“We have already caressed each other several times, not counting the night I lost my virginity with you,” Yibo told him, “but I still don’t know your body, I have no idea what you like.”

“Of course, you know,” Xiao Zhan said. “You made me feel good many times...”

“Caressing a cock or a prostate is different,” Yibo kissed him under his chin. “But I want to study you, like a map, to know what arouses you more or less...”

Xiao Zhan smiled with uncertainty. There Wang Yibo had doubts that the man knew himself well. It’s unlikely John had an aim to make their lovers feel good. The old prick definitely cared only about himself. Ok, don’t think about John, not now.

Yibo ardently kissed the line of Xiao Zhan’s cheekbones, bit his ears, scorching them with his hot breath, lowered to the neck, licking, holding back his absolutely wild desire to catch and not to let go. Xiao Zhan was breathing heavily under him, but he already had a boner and Yibo couldn’t refuse himself the pleasure to play it with his hand. He himself slipped to his nipples and his beloved was lost in shuddering sighs. Yibo payed more attention to the nipples, bit and licked, Zhan got covered with goosebumps and finally moaned, pressing his head to himself. Sweet, open, sensitive and, despite all his experience, absolutely innocent when all of that came to him.

“Lord, I want you to really make love with me so much!” he whispered in response to biting his stomach, “I need to go to Seung Yeon soon. If he tells me that everything's recovered, then I... we.. oh, Yibo!”

Wang Yibo put tongue in his navel and licked around it, marking to himself all reactions of his body, each special sigh, each emotion. He didn’t rush to touch Xiao Zhan’s cock, first he kissed his hips all over, licked under his knee. He was ready to work through his feet with his tongue as well, but thought that was too early for this kind of experiments. Eventually when Yibo reached Xiao Zhan’s member, wrapped lips around the head and embraced the base with hands, the man moaned because of either relief or approaching orgasm:

“Oh god, I’m going to lose it... Yibo, Yibo...”

“Yeah?” Wang Yibo lowered his tongue to the penile raphe and he exhaled:

“Try to insert one finger... it’ll be okay with just one. Don’t stretch, just... caress me, please. Please.”

He asked so touchingly, and was so embarrassed to say it out loud. Yibo spat jucily on his hand and tried to lubricate Xiao Zhan as much as possible, as he could, after that he penetrated him with an index finger.

The man gasped, moaned, and Yibo almost immediately found his swollen, aroused prostate, felt like a hanging pea. Xiao Zhan quietly moaned and moved his hips each time Yibo pressed his finger against it. He tried to stroke Zhan with a hand and then reached Xiao Zhan’s nipple with it, twisting it with fingers, then wrapped lips around his partner’s cock.

“Yibo...” left Xiao Zhan’s lips with a whisper, “I’m going to come soon, just don’t stop. I’m so good Yibo... so... go... oh, oh god,” he abruptly bent as if he’d been electrocuted, and Yibo got everything what Zhan gave him, trying to swallow right away and to do as Zhan's done himself – not to leave immediately, to caress him for some more time.

The man under him fully relaxed, and that was the sweetest thing. To get Zhan to himself, to partially cover himself with him, to press against himself and to freeze out of deep happiness.

“I want to fall asleep like that,” he mumbled, his cheek lying on Yibo’s chest.

“We’ll have a lot of nights when we’ll be sleeping together,” the guy promised him. “The moment we get away from here, Zhan... and I’m not getting you out of my bed.”

But closer to 1 am Xiao Zhan still went away. They were going to free the dogs, and to stay longer at Yibo’s was unreasonable: to get back home would be dangerous.

The rest of the night and the morning Wang Yibo spent in the tower alone, his first watch gone without any events. Without any unfortunate events.

Chapter Text

Yibo didn’t consequently go to work the next day because he had to catch up on sleep. He called his mother in the evening, took a shower and started to get ready for another service – the night watch. In fact, the watch lasted only for an hour – from 12 am to 1 am, then they released hounds and the watchmen went to sleep. That’s why two night watches in a row before the weekend were pretty on time.

“And then you’re free for the whole month!” cheerful Sung Joo told him.

They met at the Assembly House, the central building in their community, at fifteen to twelve. Mr. Cho was waiting for them, Yibo and Sung Joo came first, Romeo joined them the last – slightly disheveled and smiling.

“What, man, your young wife could hardly let you go?” mr. Cho winked at him.

He said nothing, just beamed more, so that they didn’t really need an answer.

Do all lovers really look like fools? – thought Yibo. – Do I really look like that near Xiao Zhan?

Mr. Cho led them to the domestic block, opened some shed near the garage where Yibo was working now, and took out three items for lads, which prompted some inner questions in Wang Yibo. Really-really a lot of questions. Those were a baton, a taser and... a gun. A traumatic one, as he guessed, but still…

Looking at Yibo’s confused face, mr. Cho clarified:

“For your own sake, man. What if the intruder is armed? Which one do you choose?”

Sung Joo and Romeo were looking at those items indifferently. The first took the taser, hiding it into his trouser’s pocket:

“Have never encountered anyone yet, no matter how long I’ve been doing it,” he yawned.

Yibo took the gun, because he thought that either way it would be better that the most dangerous weapon was at him than at Romeo. The guy lacked credibility. People like him usually caused more harm to themselves than to everyone. He might have just as well shot off his newly-wed balls. Romeo placed the baton under his belt and mr. Cho ran down the instructions, more for Yibo as a newbie:

“You can go in three, or you can separate. All objects where there’s some noise heard, or the light seen, or the door isn’t locked though you know it should be, must be checked. If there is a violation – blow the whistle.”

The man took out from the pocket thee plastic whistles on strings and handed them out to the guys, keeping telling:

“In case of emergency, call either me or William, or Seung Yeon, or John.”

“Seung Yeon?” Yibo was surprised.

“What if suddenly someone got bad and you found him?” Sung Joo brought an example. “Four years ago we found Brother Paolo like that, he had a heart attack. We barely managed to save him.”

“Right, then you go around the community till 1 am, then you release dogs. Who’ll be the one to do it?”

“Not me!” Romeo raised a hand. “Spacesuit smells, and I still come back to my wife.”

“Spacesuit?” Yibo didn’t literally understand anything.

Sung Joo sighed:

“To not let dogs bite you, the one who releases them wears the rubber suit. We call it a spacesuit. It’s old and smells. Dogs don’t react to you though.”

“So who’ll stay?” mr. Cho hurried them.

“I’ll stay,” Sung Joo shrugged. And that’s how they left it. Mr. Cho went home to sleep and the lads unhurriedly set off around the domestic block, sneaking into every gap.

“What are the dogs trained to?” Yibo asked. “Why do they react to ordinary people?”

“Who knows?” Sung Joo shrugged. Mr. Cho also had given them little flashlights and three rays danced across the domestic buildings. “They say they are trained to react to the smell of our shampoo, but that’s not clear.”

Going like that, trying to indicate any violence, knowing that you yourself once or maybe twice a week run to night dates with your lover was strange, and Yibo felt uneasy. He remembered how Xiao Zhan and him had hidden from the night watch many times before, had seen in barn gaps the lights of their flashlights, how often they were so close, and he almost felt sick. He imagined how they would hit Xiao Zhan with this exact baton, or with a taser, or shoot him with rubber bullets... And if he dared to do it because of lack of knowledge, Xiao Zhan always knew that all, every time he risked for Yibo, he knew what punishment could wait for him. And he still risked it, time after time running into his embrace, staying for a night beyond the perimeter, intruding on all the rules.

Guys were talking about any and everything, crossed the domestic block, round to the administrative one, near the Assembly House Sung Joo offered:

“Shall we part, lads? We’ll be over with this shit sooner and come home earlier. Brother Cho won’t check.”

“I’m in,” Romeo agreed fast, Yibo shrugged.

“Perfect!” Sung Joo perked up. “Who where?”

“I can go to the female one, you go to the male one and Romeo can go to the family one and he can stay there,” Yibo offered.

“Ha!” Sung Joo almost jumped as if he caught Yibo red-handed. “Romeo, Brother Yibo can’t go to the Female Block, he’s just seeking the reason! He’ll go and stay there.”

Romeo laughed, Yibo rolled eyes.

“Romeo, you go to the Female Block, you’re a husband in love, you have the ideal reputation. I’ll go to the male one, and from there right away to the dogs. And you, Yibo, run around the Family one and then soon turn back, otherwise they’ll grab your ass.”

“Whatever,” Yibo set off to the Family block, lighting the road for himself with a flashlight.

He wanted to sleep. Still, despite that they’d let him catch up sleep during the day, he didn’t have enough. Violation of regime he got used to after two months broke his whole day. He was strolling along the quiet street of the Family block. Colorful houses, illuminated somewhere, seemed to him to be creepy surreal buildings from some gothic tale. In Xiao Zhan’s house, in his bedroom, there was still light. Yibo stopped, smiling. Zhan wasn’t sleeping. What was he doing? What was he thinking about? The guy would throw a stone into his window as if in some banal romantic film but the risk to attract some extra attention to himself was too high, so he didn’t dare. Zhan and him already walked along the edge, they didn’t need…

...abrupt whistle cut the silence of the night desert.

Wang Yibo jumped at his place and got cautious all over, not getting at the beginning what that had been. A whistle? A whistle of the whistle? What was fucking going on? Was it that exact whistle, a signal one?!

But when it repeated, desperately, and then again and again, Yibo didn’t think more and dashed to the sound at full speed, head over heels.

Four or five whistles came from the Female block. Romeo! Yibo was running there as fast as he could, and behind his back in the Family block windows were being lit up by the woken people. But he appeared near Brother Romeo already near Sung Joo. The man was standing near the first man and tried to grab the whistle from his hands, the guy clenched the plastic stuff in his hand so hard.

“What happened?!” Yibo was out of breath, looking around at the territory around himself and not noticing anything unusual.

Brother Romeo stood with eyes big out of fear, he was obviously shocked and still couldn’t come back to his senses.

Sung Joo finally withdrew the whistle from his fingers because the guy had already woken up each and every person in the community.

“What, damn...” Yibo started but instead of an answer Sung Joo highlighted with a ray of flashlight somewhere far, beyond the perimeter.

Yibo lit up with his flashlight there too. Because of the building works a part of the solid fence was ruined, marking the bare place with sticks with a net stretched between them. Just in case below and above it was also covered with barbed wire, and Yibo’s ray fell through the bars on brown desert soil where some pile of rags was lying. Wait…

Yibo made several steps to the fence and realized that it was a person. A woman. She lied on earth lifelessly, with her bare feet towards the fence, wind was slightly ruffling her hair that hid her face.

Yibo gulped and turned to the guys:

“What happened? Who’s that?”

“I don’t know,” Romeo whined. He stayed white as a sheet, his lips trembled and his eyes were big and glass-like. “I just saw how she was coming under the ground, shit I got scared as hell and I shouted at her hey or hold on and then I... I just... Lord I had just a baton in my hands, what was I supposed to do?!”

Yibo runed the ray of his flashlight to the fence again: there was Romeo’s baton lying next to the woman.

“God what did you just do...” he whispered.

“How the hell did you manage to throw the baton so it hit right into her?” Sung Joo was excited.

“I don’t know,” Romeo said. “God, I killed her! I killed a human!”

At these words Sung Joo and Yibo kind of woke up from the stupor.

“She can still be alive!” Yibo rushed to the fence but then understood it was easier to run around it rather than break through or try to climb it. “I’ll go beyond the perimeter!”

“No!” Sung Joo shouted at him. “We need to call John! And Seung Yeon!”

“Hell with John!” Wang Yibo growled. “Go get Seung Yeon, now. I’ll go beyond the perimeter!”

“Yibo, they can punish you!”

“I don’t care!”

“Fool, without John a watchman in the tower can just shoot you down!” Sung Joo’s words immediately were like cold water. “They’d just think you want to run away, you idiot! Go get John, I’ll go to Seung Yeon!”

Yibo didn’t argue any more. There wasn’t much time, and he dashed back to the Family block. There was light in almost every house, but people didn’t hurry to go outside and violate the curfew. Yibo ran past the administrative block and turned to the Family one, straight along the street to the white house and then knocked on the door harshly.

Some sleepy Sister opened the door to him:

“John, now, I’m from the night watch, we have an emergency!” Yibo blurted out to her, pushing his way inside with his chest.

Somewhere in the right wing of the house the light turned on and the first to run at him was Yixuan.

“Yibo?! What happened?

But the ward didn’t manage to answer to his mentor. John came out: in silk pajamas, domestic shoes, with ruffled white hair, putting on his robe:

“What’s going on?”

“We have an emergency,” Wang Yibo repeated to him. “That’s urgent.”

He was excited how collected John turned out to be: he nodded, without any questions, just asked shortly:

“Do I need a weapon?”

“No,” Yibo replied. He was surprised how this person turned out to be ready for something like that, as if... as if he lived on the front line. Why?

“Y’all stay at home,” the order to the son. “Lead me, boy.”

With fast steps they left Family block and went to the opposite side. John didn’t ask Yibo anything, preferring to see everything with his own eyes. They silently reached the Female block, almost at the same time with Sung Joo and Seung Yeon.

“What happened?” John took Yibo’s flashlight and lit up everything around them.

“I was checking the Female block, and suddenly, through the net, I saw how something was coming from the ground... I got so scared and threw the baton in it. And it turned out to be a woman...” Romeo showed with trembling fingers behind the fence, John lit up there and Seung Yeon and him came closer.

“Is she alive?” the medic asked shortly.

“I have no idea...” Romeo almost cried.

“John, let me run out to her,” Yibo asked. “I’ll bring her here!”

“No, Seung Yeon, you come there. The watchman in the tower will let you, explain the situation to him. Help her at the place if you can and bring her here,” the leader ordered.

Seung Yeon nodded and, not wasting a minute, ran to the main gate, and John looked at the watchmen: he looked sympathizing-squeamishly at Romeo, glanced, as if blankly, Sung Joo and stopped at Yibo, coming to him and placing a hand on his neck:

“My boy, look at me...”

Yibo bit his lip. He was too anxious to resist mental attacks of John, not now, that was the least appropriate moment... But he really had no choice. The guy lifted eyes on the man.

“It’s time you fulfilled the promise you gave me,” he said soulfully. “Now you’ll help me. Will you?”

Yibo nodded slowly. Just as slowly, John neared his face to him and for a moment a stupid thought popped up in Yibo’s mind: was he going to kiss him? But John just leaned to his ear:

“Come back to the Family block,” he whispered to him, “and bring me Victor. Do you know where he lives?”

Yibo abruptly shook his head.

“Green house, right in front of mine,” John whispered. “Bring him here. Just him. And that should be quiet.”

John’s blue eyes looked in Yibo reaching the very bottom of his soul. A nauseous feeling, as if the leader was seeing through him, came back. Yibo gulped, shortly liked lips and nodded, without any more questions turning to set off to Victor.
He heard behind his back:

“Accompany Romeo to the medical post. He’s shocked. Seung Yeon will take care of him later. And someone has to make an announcement...”

When Yibo knocked on Victor’s house’s door he was already calmer. Why exactly Victor? Because he was John’s right hand? A familiar to Yibo girl in long nightgown, with a disheveled braid and in a kerchief on her shoulder opened to him.

“Sister Katarina?” the guy was surprised. That was one of the Sisters that had approached him themselves at a dance party. He hadn’t really expected to see her now, and it was just then when he realized that she was Victor’s daughter, obviously. He was a Familial and a Confidant, he had to have kids, not otherwise.

“Wang Yibo?” she muttered surprisingly.

“I need your father, now. John’s order, I’m from the watch.”

Not asking anything more, the girl dashed upstairs and woke her parents. Victor came to him sleepy. Whistles hadn’t really bothered him. Having heard about John, the man just frowned, changed slippers to boots and they came to the incident site. Unlike John, Victor wanted to know everything in advance, therefore he questioned the guy about the accident still on their way. When he heard that some woman tried to escape he quickened his steps, got worried. Just coming to the Female block they saw that Seung Yeon was carrying the victim in his hands: white arms and legs, covered with soil, she was in baggy old dirty nightgown that rolled up like harmonica, exposing here thin ankles and sharp knees, bruised and black out of earth.

Yibo’s heart twitched with a bad feeling. Seung Yeon carefully laid the girl in front of John, Victor and Yibo. John looked at them and asked the doctor:

“Is she alive?”

Seung Yeon brushed her long hair away from her face, covered with soil and blood from the fresh wound on her head, and Yibo and Victor gasped: that was Jessica-Ann Robinson.

“John...” Victor exhaled. The man turned to the Confidant and squeezed his shoulder.

“Jes...” Yibo couldn’t avert his eyes from her. She was lying on the ground like a big rag doll, covered in dirt and blood, and Yibo couldn’t believe it, it was hard for him to believe…

“No pulse,” Seung Yeon stated, placing a finger to her neck.

Victor let out some mournful groan, and John hugged him. Yibo didn’t understand how he had fallen on his knees. His legs had gotten weak and didn’t listen to him anymore. Jessica-Ann was dead? What the?.. And then it dawned on him, what Victor was doing here. Yibo lifted eyes on him. And here’s the father of the child.

“We have to take her away,” John said.

“To the medical post?” Seung Yeon specified calmly.

“No, there are Sung Joo and Romeo there...” John side eyed Yibo and the guy rushed to hide his sight.

And then they heard through the speakers: “Get back to your beds! A snake sneaked into the territory of the community. Everything’s alright!” The announcement was made twice, then the speakers turned off.

“Yibo, get back to yourself,” John told him affectionately, giving him a hand to help him back to his feet.

“What are you going to do with Jessica?” he blurted. “I mean, I wanna help...”

“You have already helped,” John said to him softly but persistently. “Seung Yeon will take care of Romeo, and we’ll take care of this girl. You’ve fulfilled your watchman’s duties, you’ve oriented yourself right, good job. But Yibo, you shouldn’t tell anyone about what happened here today, do you hear me?” John looked him in the eyes. “No one, even your friends, even Yixuan. Do you understand me?”

He waited until Yibo stupidly nodded and pat his cheek:

“Good job, boy. Now go to sleep, get some rest.”

Wang Yibo confusedly wandered back to the Male block, to the House of Brothers.

The men met him with worries, nobody slept, all of them, vying with each other, started questioning him what had happened but the guy just kept repeating:

“A snake sneaked to us. We killed it. Romeo killed it.”

They didn’t question him for long. Curiosity is a vice, all community members remembered that. They let the guy go to the shower where Yibo stood pretty long, trying to come back to his senses.

Jessica-Ann was killed while trying to flee. And, what was the worst, he couldn’t even blame Romeo, couldn’t even hate him... That was just an awkward, fatal, stupid and tragic set of circumstances…

But she couldn’t pull this off just by herself. Yibo was almost sure that, at least, Lia was involved in this. Did she manage to escape? He knew that the whole truth would be revealed in the morning, but thought that he wouldn’t fall asleep out of all experienced emotions.

However, when his head touched the pillow, Yibo fell into a really deep sleep.

It seemed to him that the signal for waking sounded right at the moment he closed eyes. Yibo was absolutely devastated and couldn’t think straight. He barely managed to get ready for breakfast, was chewing in the dining without appetite, unwillingly changed into the white shirt and went to the meeting with John.

The leader of the community looked as if he hadn't caught any sleep either, he had sore red eyes, he was nervous and sad.

That Sunday morning there were only men in the Assembly Hall. Yibo thought right away that it didn’t promise anything good. Brothers were quiet, it was felt in the air that something special had happened and everyone was just waiting for this to finally be announced.

This time Victor wasn’t starting the event, as usual. He was sitting with a dark face in the second row. John came out to them, fixed the microphone by himself, took a chair somewhere from aside, sat and started:

“Brothers...” heavy loud sigh as if words were difficult for him. “Women disappointed me one more time... Yesterday four Sisters and one laborer fled,” John took out a piece of paper and started to read names, “Anne-Rose Smith, Paloma Arpeggio, Vera Fisher, Jessica-Ann Robinson and Lia Reichel. They used the chance that next to their Female block there were building works, made a tunnel and left that night, the men who were on watch found the tunnel and this morning we saw how they had managed to do it.”

Yibo’s jaw dropped. It seemed that John wasn’t going to tell people that Jessica-Ann had been killed. Would she be considered a runaway? Missing?

“These lying little bitches,” John’s voice broke as if he was trying to repress emotions within himself, but Yibo felt how other Brothers started resenting, getting angry, as though absorbing his emotions, “worked at night. They made a tunnel really fast, using the chance that there was an excavating pit and the foundation was getting laid. These quirky ungrateful bastards misused our care about them!”

“Yes!” someone shouted.

“We’re building a home so they would live better! And they are using the moment and literally for two weeks dig a tunnel, narrow like a cleft to hell, to leave and demonstrate another time their disrespect to us, their disregard, self-will!”

“All females are bitches!” someone shouted. “Thick-headed whores!”

“Yeah! Yeah!” the mass got excited. “Punishment! They deserve punishment!”

“Oh, they will be punished!” John promised and suddenly took a deep round cup from under the tissue, on the table not far from him, filled with some liquid. “I want you to share my pain, Brothers! Share my pain, otherwise how can I handle it?”

He drank from the cup and passed it along the rows. Yibo was sure that there was alcohol there, and he was also sure that was not only that. There would rather be the same drug that had been at his Initiation, but not so concentrated. Each of them made a sip and passed a cup to a neighbor. When it reached Wang Yibo he, of course, didn’t want to drink, trying to imitate a sip but his neighbor at the bench was peering at him closely so the guy didn’t dare play tricks. He drank obediently and without words too. Edges of the cup were tainted by the lips and hands of other people. He was disgusted. Out of all that charade, of John's simulated “grief”, of this misogyny verging on the absurd, and more, of that fact that he’d said nothing about Jessica-Ann. Yibo was sure, her name wasn’t going to sound within the walls of the Assembly Hall, she had become forgotten even before the sun rose.

John kept talking about his sorrow, and that only Brothers could support him, that he found a shelter among them, that Brothers were chosen ones and God himself put men to command women and that these stupid bitches were going to pay.

Wang Yibo tried not to listen to him: he was looking at the back of Victor’s head. Did he already forget about Jessica-Ann and his child she had been expecting because of him? He was going to keep silent, he was definitely going to keep silent. He moved his sight to Sung Joo, he was sitting one row forward from him. Sung Joo didn’t even know exactly if that girl was dead or not. But he wasn’t a fool. What was John going to do so that the guy would keep silent? Would he threaten him with anything? Would he pressure him through his parents? Seung Yeon. This man was calm and unfazed. Might Xiao Zhan have been right and his plan was shit and they shouldn’t rely on Seung Yeon? Maybe he had ice instead of heart. Yibo got goosebumps because of his equanimity and constant calmness. There was no Romeo. Yibo was sure he was still at the medical post. That was for good, they didn’t need his whining here.

Wang Yibo felt how the drink struck his head. The feeling of drunkenness was approaching him, and there was some feeling of irreality of the present. He just wanted to leave this madhouse, just wanted to get rid of all that, he was tired, so damn tired…

Yibo looked for Xiao Zhan with his eyes, his lighthouse he got stuck for in this madhouse. There was it, the black back of his head, long thin neck and ideal spine of a musician. Xiao Zhan... If only Yibo knew what he was going to encounter in this hecking sect, would he still follow the man of his dreams?

Suddenly everyone around him was getting drunk, the Hall got blurry in front of his eyes. As though through the water column sounds of alien voices reached Yibo, John’s admonitions, the man was telling and telling something in his mic, telling and telling…

They were drugged... all of them were drugged…

A flash. Everyone scattered around the Hall, Yibo was standing and clinging to the back of his bench, he was searching Xiao Zhan with his eyes, but there was no sign of him.

A flash. He was holding onto Yixuan’s jacket lapels.

“We need to talk.”

“I don’t want to talk to you,” he denied. Yixuan was drugged too, some phantasmagoria was happening around.

“Fool,” Yibo told him, “blind fool.”

A flash. They were in the storage room. Yibo, Sung Joo and... John. He was holding them by their necks. Yibo wanted to throw his hand off but he came back to his senses on time and held back. The leader told them:

“I understand, this case is extraordinary, it seems I even heard that some of you liked her... But you must promise me that you’ll keep her death a secret. It must remain between us. Jessica-Ann fled!”

Wang Yibo sniffled but didn’t say anything. John insisted:

“That’s not for me, that’s for Brother Romeo! Think about him! He’s just got married, he’s such a good, decent and well-behaved boy... Do you want the label of murder to stick to him? Do you want all his further life to be poisoned? He’s just fulfilled his duties, any of you could have been at his place...”

A flash. Yibo stood naked under the shower in the House of Brothers.

“Whoa!” he shrinked from the water, having no idea how he’d got there.

Having turned off the water he wiped himself with a towel. His pajamas were carefully placed on the hanger. The guy dressed himself and came to Brothers into the common room They turned to him, Menz asked:

“Brother, woke up?”

“How come I got here?”

“We had to hold you and drag you here, you were messed up,” Arek replied. “You and the old man Isaac.”

Isaac was lying in his bed, with his back facing the others.

“I don’t even remember how I got here...” Yibo ran a hand over his face.

“John’s cocktail had a really strong influence on you,” Silver noticed. “Even though you are an Asian, it still doesn’t hit other guys as much as you.”

“What time’s it?” Yibo glanced at the clock. The dinner was coming. “And what about Labor Day?”

“There has been no Labor Day,” William said. “Women are punished: John’s isolated them from the community, they don’t take part in any events, don’t go to meetings, even the building of the House of Sisters had been stopped.”

Yibo thought that it was impossible to “isolate” women “from the community” because they were a part of it, but he was still sick and he got really tired. Therefore he just said nothing and went to change. Isaac in the corner kept crying: of course, such grief. Not only was his prodigal daughter a dirty lesbian but she fled now.

Yibo indifferently went past his tears.

The whole evening before the dinner Wang Yibo was thinking about everything that had happened for the last twenty four hours. He didn’t understand why he was so disgusted and why he was so worried about the death of Jessica-Ann. They weren’t friends, they talked just once then why... why did he feel as though he was responsible for her loss?

He had a dream at night, as if he was beyond the perimeter, he got out and was standing near the door of the house of Jessica-Ann’s parents. And for some reason it was him who should have said why their daughter had died. Died trying to escape from the sect. She was killed, either intentionally or occasionally, by a stupid boy who was now afraid of himself.

He woke up covered in sweat out of a piercing reluctance to tell Jessica-Ann’s parents about her death. There were tears in his eyes. Yibo was angry with himself: what the hell? Why had he even had to tell anyone something like that?! That was a police matter, not his, he wasn’t guilty and he shouldn’t even feel guilty!

In the quiet of the night Yibo heard how somewhere on the territory of the community car’s engine was working. The guy listened carefully to this sound that hadn’t been there at nights before. Then a slap of the door and the car moved. Yibo had no idea why that was the first idea to pop on his mind but that was:

They take her body away, they get rid of the corpse.

And here he felt really scared.

The next day, on Sunday morning Yibo didn’t resist and went to Yixuan. He had to talk to someone, and Yixuan and him had to make it up. Despite that he’d promised John not to tell anyone about what had happened and he himself still saw that it was dangerous to talk about it, he felt that Yixuan had to know. That this truth will benefit their business.

But Yixuan didn’t want to see him and didn’t come to him.

Yibo didn’t know what to do. He was aimlessly walking around the community as though he had all the time on earth. And then for some reason he went to the medical post.

There was no Seung Yeon there, but Romeo was sitting on one of the beds. He twitched and stiffened when Yibo came to him, asked angrily:

“Why are you here? To blame me?”

Yibo looked at Romeo and he was feeling no anger towards him. Not to him. He hated John, his ugly harsh rules, he hated the situation in the whole, Victor, this hecking sect but not the direct murderer of Jessica. The guy had never been in such a controversial situation... curious…

Answering Romeo’s questions, Yibo just shaked head. He didn’t sit near, just leaned on the wall, crossing arms on his chest:

“How long are you going to hide here?”

Romeo’s chin started trembling. How old was he? Eighteen? Twenty? Twenty-two? Not more. And his world got upside-down. Split into before and after. There he was a happy husband, just married a woman he had been long in love with, and here he was a murderer who had to keep his secret till the end of his life. How was he? One glance at Romeo was enough to understand the answer to these questions.

“They told Miyami the snake bit me,” the guy told Yibo. “They don’t let her to me, they think I won’t take it and will tell her everything.”

“A lot of people are aware,” Yibo said. “There will still be rumors.”

“Why did I even take that stupid baton?!” he shouted and eventually burst into tears. As all red-headed people he went extremely red out of emotions, awful sight. “I could have taken a taser at least! I couldn’t have used it and would have just started to whistle and she could have escaped! She could have managed to escape!”

Yibo looked at him and thought that indeed after such events people get into sects: broken, disoriented, lost their life-spine. What would be with Romeo now? Would he sink deeper into John’s ideology? Would he become passionately believing in his leader, just because he wouldn’t judge him and would accept him back into the Community with open arms?

“John’ll help you,” Yibo said for some reason. He didn’t know himself what he was doing there.

“I’m sorry, Yibo!” Romeo suddenly said through his tears. “I know you liked her! Sung Joo told me you’d danced together and sat in the gazebo for so long… Forgive me, please, forgive me...”

Yibo suddenly also felt like crying. At the same time he saw that he had to do something for Romeo. He couldn’t leave him like that. He had to tell him something, something that could make it easier for him to accept what had happened.

“She’s guilty herself,” the guy said with difficulty. “She shouldn’t have escaped.”

They were going to show a film in the evening. A white canvas was stretched in the Assembly Hall, the projector was put. The film was old, black and white, from the period when women had thin waists and puffy skirts, and men over forty were sex-symbols.

Everyone behaved as if nothing had happened. Men were perked up, in a good mood and didn’t look at the empty female side. No word was said about the runaway girls.

Xiao Zhan sat next to him and just by his glance Yibo saw that he was worried about him. Then they turned off the lights and the movie started and Zhan carefully placed a hand over his and squeezed it in silent support.

Yibo didn’t delve into the action, just tried to hold himself and to think about Zhan’s hand and when the film was over, when nobody saw, the man led him to the storage room, closed the door and whispered:

“Yibo, you seem wiped out for two days straight. Something happened at the night watch, didn’t it? I heard a whistle, and how someone was running around the Family block, what happened? Can you tell me?”

Wang Yibo understood that if he didn’t tell anyone he would literally explode. He couldn’t carry all these emotions just within himself, couldn’t suppress it in himself. Having lifted eyes on Zhan, he said:

“They killed her, Zhan. They took her body away the next night, I’m sure. They got rid of her like trash...”

And burying his face in Zhan’s shoulder he, finally, with all sorrow and relief, burst into tears.

Chapter Text

After Yibo had cried himself out to Xiao Zhan he felt better. He managed to calmly fall asleep that night, even without any dreams about Jessica-Ann and her parents.

It was Xiao Zhan who slept badly. To be more exact, at first everything went as usual: he took a late shower, changed into his pajamas, thought a lot about Yibo and what he had told him about in the storage room. Went to bed. But woke up in the middle of the night, jumped in his bed with a heart beating loudly. Because he’d dreamt about something from his own childhood. Something he had put much effort to forget for all these years. But it just had popped up in his subconscious, and Xiao Zhan clung to this memory because that was exactly what they needed. Exactly what Wang Yibo and him needed. Compromising evidence on John. It existed.

On Monday morning, having left for work, Yibo saw very annoyed Ivan. The mechanic met him with an unfriendly glare though Yibo understood that he wasn’t to blame for anything.

“Did you come, Yibo? Good. We have a lot to do here. We’ll be working on this pickup for a whole week, damn it...”

Yibo confusedly looked at the master and the man just sighed and waved at him letting Yibo see himself what a messed pickup that was, he had definitely got into a huge accident: the whole front bumper was crumpled into “an accordion”, the headlights were knocked and the glass was cracked, one of the side mirrors was holding on by a hair if not taking scratches and some other stuff into account.

“What happened?” Yibo was excited. The pickup had still been old but fine on Friday.

“This weekend our chauffeur had been sent somewhere right in the middle of the night. Don’t know what’s so urgent but they pulled me from the bed right to the garage to open. He went out there safe and sound but got into an accident on the way back. I have no idea how it found a pillar in the middle of the desert, pigheaded piece of shit...”

That was the car Yibo had heard that night. It was easy to guess what a task that had been.

“Is this pick up a subject to restore?” the guy asked doubtedly.

Ivan looked at him with a glance as if you were even doubting me? Even grunted proudly:

“I’ve assembled cars from scratch, boy. We’ll do it in under a week if you do everything I tell you. It's just a pity we’re temporarily without a driver now. That dimwit’s nose is bent by the airbag. He somehow broke his arm as well... Well, the world holds idiots like that.”

Yibo immediately felt that it was a chance and offered humbly:

“I can take his place so far...”

Ivan glanced seriously at his helper and mumbled:

“We’ll see... I still have a driving license, and a lot of people in the community do.”

They didn’t get back to the topic anymore.

On Monday after lunch, two gone women were brought back: Ann-Rose Smith and Vera Fisher. They were brought just like Xiao had told him that day – right by the police, under guard as if they were criminals and their community was their prison. It was partially true. But Paloma Arpeggio and Lia still remained free and that fact warmed Yibo’s heart. He really hoped they were alright and they would never come back again.

One thing was perfectly obvious: it wasn’t enough just to escape from the community. They had to get out of here as far and fast as they could, to lie low and only then to ask the federals for help. He didn’t know how far John’s claws and his influence were spread but he knew with certainty that he wouldn’t let them bring Zhan and him back the moment they breath in the air of freedom.

On Monday evening Xiao Zhan waylaid Yibo when he was on his way to dinner. That was so visible, the guy came around the dining, obviously nervous. Yibo winced: when Zhan was swept by emotions he often acted recklessly. That was bad, really bad.

“Oh, Brother Yibo!” Xiao Zhan pretended he hadn’t expected to see him here. At the time of common dinner. Near the dining.

“Brother Zhan...” Yibo took him by the elbow and dragged to the side so that no one could sight the Confidant. “What the hell?...”

“Sorry, Yibo, that’s urgent,” he immediately whispered. “We need to meet and talk.”

“Has something happened to you?”

“No. But I remembered one thing.” Judging by Zhan’s sight Yibo thought that thing was really an important one.

“Okay, when?”

“Tomorrow, in the rehearsal house. Will you?”

Yibo nodded vaguely, added:

“When the curtains are closed, yeah?”

Xiao Zhan nodded too and Yibo understood the man wanted to kiss him, he felt that but they didn’t dare and separated.

All those days Yixuan intentionally avoided Yibo because... his whole world was turning upside down. Ruined, if you want. Yibo’s words raised doubts in him, no, not really, they resurrected them. He always had doubts, but Yixuan like the others in the community turned a blind eye, dismissed them, choosing to believe. Believe and not think. But Yibo kicked the fundament of belief from under his feet, and what he’d heard in father’s study – all that deprived him of all guidelines. It seemed to him he was drowning, choking and the guy wasn’t really up to seeing Yibo. He needed to sort out himself first.

He was sorting out all the strange, dubious, questionable moments he’d heard and witnessed over and over again. It’s not that all those unfolded right in front of him. After all, father and him lived in different parts of the house, and there was clearly regulated time when they met for deals, and in everyday life Yixuan saw his parent not more often than any other inhabitant of the community. They rarely had lunch or dinner together with the whole family, for instance, and really…

Yixuan was haunted all his life by the feeling of illegality of his mother and his place in the community. Even after Mary’s death when it seemed that father made him his official heir and put his mother above all other women in the community, his father’s disengagement, his indifference made Yixuan understand that they lived here all thanks to his mercy.

Of course, the guy wanted to spend more time with John, especially in childhood or teenagehood. But the man set the notable distance between him and his son, and at some moment Yixuan just stopped to fight for his attention.

But on those days when he still tried to visit him more often he constantly encountered some crying boys, and Seung Yeon and Xiao Zhan who saw his father more than he did.

Sure, his mother was the first to notice his confused and depressed state. She decided to talk to Yixuan at lunch on Monday. Of course, they were alone. John preferred to eat alone again.

“I don’t like what you look like these days,” Zhou Lianzin started. “Is it because of the gone Sisters?”

Yixuan gritted his teeth and shaked his head shortly. He didn’t know if it was even worth telling his doubts to his mother. Would she tell him the truth, even if she knew it?

“Mom...” Yixuan wasn’t looking at the women, he was examining the table layout. His mother liked beautiful dishware and they had a lot of it at home, “Were you happy with dad? Ever?”

The woman froze, lifted gaze at her son, carefully scanned him with a sight.

“Why do you ask me such questions out of the blue?”

“What do you mean such?” Yixuan didn’t expect that his mother would start to speak frankly. Curiosity was a vice, he still remembered that.

She didn’t give a comment, just sighed. Kept eating and then eventually replied:

“We can barely be called a family, you see it.”

Yixuan looked at the empty place at the head of the table where the father was supposed to sit.

“What are we doing here then?”

Zhou Lianzin stared at her son, fully excited. It was written on her face that it was pretty obvious.

“Of course we’re here for you. For you and your future. Do you think I would endure all that for nothing?”

These words somehow made Yixuan angry. It seemed to him that his mother was shifting all responsibilities on him: for their semi-legal position, for the decision to move to the USA, for their family issues.

“For what future, mom?” he asked, almost angrily.

Zhou Lianzin got annoyed too:

“Don’t be a fool! You perfectly understand me!” She even threw a napkin away with outrage, “You’ll become John’s successor sooner or later! You’ll inherit this house, this land, the business of your father...”

“What business, mom?!” he asked her with pressure, interrupting. “Do you even know what your husband really does?!”

Zhou Lianzin kept silent, pursing her lips. Yixuan said:

“If we discard the conception of a healthy and prosperous Society, of eco-village and just take the real figures, bare figures, mom, and facts, if we look at it like the business-model... Do you know what father does? By what means the community exists, by what we all eat and live? By what money he buys us clothing, all this beautiful dishware, where he gets all these resources for almost constant building works? What does father do?”

She kept silent. Yixuan continued:

“But I’ll tell you: he has off-the-book records. A separate file with the documents that I’m not allowed to pry into. You yourself of course have guessed about it. And there, I’m sure debit and credit coincide, not like what I have...” Yixuan rubbed his forehead. He didn’t want to eat at all now. Zhou Lianzin silently sipped water from a beautiful glass on a curved leg. “What is in father’s file? What will I really inherit? What will I have to deal with when he’s dead, and all the reins are in my hands? Have you ever thought that it was probably something illegal? That father just covers up his secret deals with the community? Have you thought that he just got us into some crime, that he just pulls us... down?”

“You don’t know it for sure,” he replied huskily. “There can be something pretty innocent.”

“Mom!” Yixuan even laughed. “Sometimes you’re really like a child...”

“Well, then, pray tell, why did you think about it just now?!” the woman outraged, “You’ve been helping father for so long, but managed to talk about it just now!”

“It doesn’t matter!” Yixuan raised the tone of his voice too, “If this talk had taken place eight years ago what would it change?”

The woman was looking at her son, leaned to him above the table and touched his hand.

“My baby... I know that it’s hard for you... But we have already come so far... Just remember how poorly we lived in China, how I had to sew pants for you right from my old skirts, how you ate powdered sugar just because there was nothing else but it at home, and I had to come back home with money and food only late in the evening... And how we live now! That’s all yours, baby, rightfully yours! We only need to wait for your hour, you will yet spread your wings!”

He squeezed her hand with his own.

“And where am I flying mom? Right into prison? What am I supposed to do with all this father’s heritage if his deals turn out to be illegal? What should I do with all this community? With ruined lives and broken fates?”

Her sight changed, filled with pain and anxiety.

“Why are you saying it?”

And then Yixuan eventually said out loud what he had been thinking for long time but what he never dared to voice:

“Do you see happy people around you?”

In the evening on Tuesday Yibo and Zhan managed to meet. Xiao Zhan even didn’t dashed at him with kissed and pesterings as he used to do, he was too nervous and anxious for that, he started to talk hastily right away:

“I’ve recalled something that I forgot many years before! This truth hasn't popped up in my mind for so long... There is compromising material on John! And it... it might be here, in the community, I think, in his study.”

Yibo collected himself immediately, peering into feverishly glowing Zhan’s eyes.

“What is it?”

“Video,” he exhaled, and in his mind flashed:

...- Look to the right, baby, do you see a red light? Look at it. You’re so beautiful... Everyone should see it... there you go... there you go...”

“He filmed us on camera,” the man clarified.

Yibo’s heart fell somewhere to his feet, his insides engulfed with a cold wave, he knew what John had filmed but still asked in a phantom hope to hear something else:

“You?”

“Yes,” Xiao Zhan said and looked his beloved in the eyes, “Sometimes he made me do it with him on camera. To look at the red light while he... you know. I forgot that, in fact, I tried to forget but when I started to think about the evidence and proofs it just popped up in my mind, I dreamt about it. Do you get it?”

Yibo understood that Xiao Zhan had already lived through it. Rather, amid the rest of the creepy nightmare that surrounded him, the red light in the corner maybe seemed just sheer nonsense to him. But Yibo hadn’t lived through it. He felt sick, he felt nauseous, wrath and hatred to John tied in a knot in his stomach, went up the esophagus and pressed against his Adam's apple from down below. Yibo had to hide his face in hand and to lean against the more or less cold wall with his forehead.

Bastard, son of a bitch, dirty pedofile... Hatred soared in him, and then he just felt Xiao Zhan’s hand on his shoulder, closer to his neck and his soft voice:

“Yibo... don’t be like that... that's good news to us.”

The guy involuntarily moved away from the wall and looked at Xiao Zhan. It seemed to him Xiao Zhan didn’t worry, but, sure, it wasn’t true. He just learned to live with it.

“Good news?” Yibo wheezed.

Xiao Zhan leaned much closer to him, embraced him, pulling him against himself and whispered into his ear:

“Yeah. I don’t think he either sells porn or did it earlier. Anyway, he didn’t serialize it. I think he did it just for himself. It means that all that is still kept somewhere. On his computer or some old disk, I don’t know. But it exists! The exact proof that you told me about: the one that’s difficult to reject, to ignore, that you can send to all the media, yeah?”

“How’d you know that?” Yibo asked, burying his face into Zhan’s collarbone.

“What?”

“That it’s not serialized?”

“First, that didn’t happen really often. Rarely, that’s why I completely forgot about it. And boys never complained to me, and it means that he didn’t film them too, or did it not regularly, so rarely that it wasn’t worth mentioning. If you sell child porn then you have to film something over and over again, don’t you?”

Despite feeling not well Yibo couldn’t disagree that there was logic in Zhan’s words.

“And it means he did it for himself and he stores these videos somewhere, right? If only we knew how to get them...”

“I’m sorry,” Yibo said quietly and soulfully, lifting sight at his beloved, “I’m sorry that you had to live through all of that.”

Xiao Zhan got confused, he didn’t know how to react to words like that. He smiled shyly and then just said:

“Thank you.”

Wednesday was meant to be an average boring day, absolutely uneventful. Yibo and Ivan almost fully disassembled the front bumper of the pickup, ordered details that weren’t possible to restore. Ivan took the roof to the smithy (they even had a little smithy, Yibo surprisingly found that Menz was a blacksmith), he promised to straighten the metal sheet, and Ivan and Yibo would paint the pickup newly, in general, they had a lot to do.

Ivan just took details and went down into the pit, under the bumper, loudly commenting on everything he was doing. Yibo lit it up for him with a flashlight and gave things that he needed from outside. It was like an operation, where Ivan was the main surgeon and Yibo was assisting him. But right at the time of this idyll Mr. Cropp, one of the Familial and the Confidants, broke into the garage with big eyes and shouted from the door:

“Where’s Ivan?! A car and a driver, now! My wife went into premature labor!”

Yibo got even confused a little, only a suspicious voice of Ivan from the pit got him back to his senses:

“And where on earth is your wife, and Seung Yeon?”

“They’re coming!” Brother Cropp didn’t hesitate a bit, “What car’s working here?”

“Not this pickup, for sure... Yibo, get me out of here...”

Yibo lifted the car with a huge jack to let his master-mentor climb out of the pit.

“How’re you going?” Ivan specified. “Altogether? There’s not much space in pickup. Should I give you a whole ass bus or what?”

“We can use pickup!” Cropp fussed, running around the garage. “My wife and I can get in a trailer.”

“Think so?” that was Seung Yeon. He was moving a deeply pregnant woman about to faint in a wheelchair, “Do you want her to shake out there? She’s already lost a lot of blood. The Sister will sit in the salon and you can sit wherever you want!”

No one dared to argue the word of authority from Seung Yeon. Mr. Cropp begged Ivan:

“Brother, give me a bus! And sit at the steering wheel, I’m too anxious now to drive! And Brother Seung Yeon doesn’t have a driving license!”

Judging by Ivan’s face Yibo could tell that the man didn’t want to go anywhere himself. The man would gladly stay in his lovely garage and would keep unhurriedly, slowly and gradually restore the pickup. It would be a sin not to use this chance, and Yibo, without hesitations, offered:

“Let me drive?”

Everyone stared at him. Seung Yeon suddenly said:

“Brother Yibo can remain cold-blooded, I know.”

He meant that case with Jessica, for sure, when Yibo didn’t hesitate and had done everything right in the emergency situation.

“Haven’t you forgotten how to drive?” Ivan asked just in case.

Yibo lifted brows sarcastically.

“For two months? ‘Course not.”

“Make a decision!” Seung Yeon roared at them. He could surprisingly stay unfazed and be angry at the same time.

“Ok, Yibo, go,” Ivan told him. “But you have to go to Kelly first, John’s secretary, to his house, she’s got your driving license. Take it, and I’ll prepare Opel, you all will fit there after all...”

The guy nodded and wanted to run away already when Seung Yeon literally caught him by the arm.

“Yibo, wait...” The doctor took out a round stamp from a pocket, blew on it and put a label right on his hand, “Kelly will trust you faster and will work quicker...”

John’s secretary worked right there in the white house but on the first floor. She huddled in a small room, probably a former storage, at the desk piled with papers, at the old big computer. She was surrounded by several metal safes and even a cupboard was squeezed there and was filled with papers too.

The girl didn’t ask any extra questions, especially having seen the label from Seung Yeon. She hurriedly opened one of the safes and took a folder, as Yibo understood, fully devoted to him. His personal files. There were all his documents he had had the moment he came to the community including his driving license.

Having grabbed it, he dashed back. Ivan had already moved the only car from the garage that wasn’t a pickup – an old Opel Ascona, produced in the 80s.

“Sister Cropp will be able to at least lie here...” Ivan told them finally, throwing keys to Yibo.

Yibo sat at the steering wheel, Mr. Cropp – in the passenger seat, Seung Yeon and Sister were behind.

To find yourself at the steering wheel again after a two-month break was really strange but Yibo thought that he would get busy with safe-analysis later. He smoothly moved and went to the main gates when a watchman in the tower opened it for them. And then he went to north-west, to Anthony, but Seung Yeon told him:

“No, we are going to Las Cruces, she is having massive bleeding, they won’t help her in Anthony.”

Then the guy pushed harder and they went to a larger city.

Mrs. Cropp was moaning weakly and huskily in the backseat, bathing it in blood. Seung Yeon was sitting at her legs, periodically looking under her skirt, in the passenger seat Mr. Cropp was constantly turning and only tired everyone with his nervousness. Yibo tried to ignore it and to drive car fast but as smoothly as he could. Situation got better when he went onto the flat highway.

And when they were approaching the city Seung Yeon started to prompt him where to turn and how to go, eventually they reached the city hospital, men opened the car and urgently asked for a gurney and then set off into the hospital with Mrs. Cropp altogether.

Yibo suddenly found himself alone. And here it fell on him all in one go: unusual strange situation he got into, everything was alien – that he was at the steering wheel, that he was standing now in the center of a big city...

Stupid ideas tempted him one by one: run right now, you have the keys after all. Run for your life to the neighboring state, go to the police. Or – go into the hospital and ask for a call. Call the store and ask Sam for help, or call your father or still call the police…

But he was too afraid to do anything from those. To run alone, without Xiao Zhan, he wouldn’t dare and, still, he wouldn’t be able to run really far, he would be brought back like the Sisters, and all his effort would go to waste. To call somewhere, risking to be seen by Seung Yeon at any moment... He would tell John that he caught Yibo doing something illegal, wouldn’t he? He might do... Or mightn’t he?

But Yibo couldn’t know it for sure – Seung Yeon went out to him, exhausted but sighing in relief:

“Suster Cropp’s in safe hands now, we can go back...”

“And Brother Cropp?” Yibo asked.

“He’s staying with her overnight, I paid for his bunk. I’m going to them tomorrow and will see if she delivered or not...”

Men sat back into the Opel, Yibo started the engine, carefully went from a parking space. Asked casually:

“Seung Yeon, aren’t you... aren’t you afraid to leave the Cropps in the hospital? What if they would want to run away? Like those Sisters...”

“They wouldn’t,” Seung Yeon was sitting near him in the passenger seat. Having fastened a seatbelt, he leaned back on the back of the chair and half-lidded his tired eyes, “They have two more kids in the community, they’re under the eye of Sister Ursula now. They’ll come back.”

Oh, yeah, – Yibo thought, – when your children are almost held hostage... You can hardly run away. Stupid question.

“Seung Yeon, don’t you mind music? Can I turn on the radio?”

He vaguely hummed but Yibo interpreted this as a sign of affirmation. It was also strange and really pleasant to listen to the radio. He couldn't choose a wave for a long time and stopped at the first more or less nice track (1). He wanted to relax too. They did a great job after all – saved a life and, probably, not just one. And Yibo relaxed, he didn’t have any other option still.

On Thursday he found out that they decided to make him a temporary replacement chauffeur.

Chapter Text

Ivan told him it like that on Thursday morning: you are a replacement chauffeur now. Yibo was confused:

“T-thank you...” He smiled, still not believing. “All of a sudden...”

“Why?” the master shrugged. “You’re so eager, and you had a successful drive yesterday... Seung Yeon offered it himself, and I don’t mind either... Just don’t you forget to help me.”

“Of course, I won’t forget!” the guy beamed, having no idea how to hold back his glee.

“Because you’re replacing a Familial, you’ll replace him at all his watches as well. So look through the new timetable, Brother Cho made it yesterday...”

Yibo looked it through: now not only trips on various errands rested on his shoulders but night-day watches of the resigned Brother as well, one of those was going to be this week already.

“Oh, Brother should be on watch as a night guard at John’s house...”

“Now you’re going instead of him,” Ivan said. “And now Seung Yeon and you’re going to the hospital, you’ll find out how it went yesterday.”

Seung Yeon appeared already in twenty minutes, collected and serious, as usual. On the way to Las Cruces Yibo tried to engage him in a conversation, to somehow make friends:

“Ivan said that it was you who recommended me as a new chauffeur,” the guy smiled and looked sideways at his travel companion. The man was looking on the road out of the side window, “Thank you. It’s nice when you’re trusted...”

“It’s not about trust,” he answered coldly, “You’re just doing your job. It’s enough. Why make it more difficult?”

By the tone of doctor’s voice Yibo understood that he wouldn’t hold a small talk so he decided not to pressure him. Yibo didn’t want to seem to Seung Yeon a egg sucker who gets in your head, so he just turned on the radio, having decided to just enjoy the music and the trip. Just said finally:

“Just know that I really enjoy driving. So I’m glad with my new post.”

When Seung Yeon hid in the hospital Yibo thought once again about the option to call the store. He figured how much time he needed for that, drumming on the steering wheel with his fingers. And still that was a huge risk to be caught by Seung Yeon. And what if not into hospital, then where? Yibo got out of the car and looked around. In general, he could go to any store... Now or should he wait a little more? Maybe it was better to gain his trust, to show he calmly gave lifts to everyone back and forth, to collect some evidence... Maybe it would still work out with those videos and Xiao Zhan would be able to find them?...

“Why did you go out, Yibo?” That was Mr. Cropp. He was approaching the car sleepy and exhausted, that was seen right away.

Yibo almost twitched, turned back.

“I wanted to stretch. How was everything?”

“She delivered at dawn,” he finally smiled, “Suffered so much, lost a lot of blood and I – my nerves. But now I have a third son, a healthy baby, five pounds, a good looker, just like me.”

“Congratulations,” Yibo smiled and shaked Brother Cropp’s hand, “Where’s Seung Yeon?”

“I’m here,” he showed at the glass doors of the hospital, “Let’s go back. Sister Cropp and the child are still weak, they’ll be discharged from the hospital only at the end of the week.”

Men sat in the Opel and went back to the community. On the way to the ranch Brother Cropp was nervous and kept asking Seung Yeon:

“Is that okay that my wife is so costly for the Community? So many hospital bills... What do you think? Will John be very angry?”

“You know that, Mr. Cropp,” Seung Yeon told him unabashedly, “John never gets angry when it’s about kids...”

“That’s true, that’s true...”

The men came back to the community at lunch and the whole community heard from the loudspeakers that a new Child of Salvation was born. It meant that the coming weekend a small celebration was taking place, but only for men because the female part of the Community was still under restrictions.

Yixuan came to Yibo at that time.

Yibo felt some mixed feeling of relief, joy, curiosity and some sadness at his visit. His mentor had subtly changed: something had changed in his sight, his posture and his self-presentation. Yibo saw that the last week he had spent, probably, in bitter deliberation and torments, left its mark on him. He felt sorry for his... friend, Yibo himself wouldn’t want to be in his shoes. And how much brave it must have taken him to come to Yibo and say:

“We need to talk.”

“I’m glad,” the guy said simply, “I wanted to talk too.”

“Oh, God...” Yixuan smiled sadly, “Now I get afraid when you speak like that.”

“I’m sorry,” his ward sighed, “Do you want to play checkers?”

“We’ll manage it this time. I’m coming after lunch.”

Wang Yibo was even a little nervous before the meeting with Yixuan. He had already firmly decided to tell him the truth about Jessica-Ann’s death. He felt that Yixuan’s guard cracked, that he was subconsciously ready to listen and to hear. He just had to find the right words.

Yixuan went for him to the House of Brothers, they went around the community but naturally turned to the library where it was more customary for them. Yixuan didn’t hurry to speak, Yibo didn’t push him, letting him collect his thoughts. Finally, when they placed themselves in the empty room, Yixuan, as usual, loosened the collar of his button-up, started to talk slowly:

“I was at Seung Yeon.”

Yibo perked up his ears: so, Yixuan still doubted, if he’d visited the doctor it meant his words had the right effect.

“And what did he say?” the guy asked carefully.

“Said that it was all just dirty rumors, just a made up story,” he said, looking Yibo intensely in the eyes for some reason.

Something was wrong. Yibo felt that, but didn’t understand what exactly.

“Do you believe him?” he asked huskily.

Yixuan’s sight got more aloof, he said wistfully:

“Why shouldn’t I trust him?”

And here Yibo understood what confused him so much: Yixuan didn’t look like a person who was relieved to hear about his father’s innocence. No... He looked like a person who was still doubting. That’s why he came to Yibo to talk. But what did he want? To dispel doubts finally or…

“Is that what you wanted to talk me?” Yibo clarified, “To voice Seung Yeon’s answer?”

Yixuan’s sight perked up, he looked at Yibo as if hesitating, then he made some internal decision.

“Yeah. Just that. Actually...” he stood up as though the conversation was over, “don’t trust the rumors, they’re unsupported. I don’t want anything to disturb you on your Way.”

Oh, Yixuan, Yixuan... Are you burying your head in the sand or are you trying to guard me from the awful truth?

“Jessica-Ann Robinson was killed,” Yibo said, not leaving Yixuan a chance to go away, “And your father and Victor hid that and secretly transported her corpse out of the community.”

Yixuan froze. His lurking sight was telling him that he, in the last hope, was trying to cling to the fact that he just misheard, or Yibo was lying or joking. But Yibo was looking him right in the eyes and was dead serious. Then Yixuan sunk into the chair, hiding his face with hands with a moan.

Yibo told him about his watch and what he witnessed, about his friendship with Jessica-Ann and the story of her appearance in the community. Yixuan was listening and not disturbing at all. He even sympathized with him. Yibo felt that every word was lying on the shoulders of this innocent guy like a heavy plate. At the end Yibo said:

“I promised John not to tell anyone what happened, including you, but I broke my promise consciously: I think, you should know.”

Yixuan sighed deeply and mumbled:

“You can imagine how happy I would be not to know it. To forget it all like a nightmare and again...” he stuttered but eventually said, not looking at Yibo, “respect my father.”

“I can imagine,” Yibo said quietly, “Trust me, I would like to forget about a lot of things I learned here.”

Yixuan sighed, shuddering. Guys fell silent. Then Yibo started carefully:

“Sorry for... for spilling it all on you like that...”

The man just hummed bitterly.

“What are you going to do now?” Yibo tried not to even breathe, because he understood that Yixuan’s inner world wasn’t stable right now.

“I don’t know,” he said, gritting teeth, “I have no idea what to do with all that...”

Yibo understood that to pressure Yixuan right now would be wrong: let's leave him boiling... he would understand it himself. Yibo believed in his mentor more than ever, he felt that it would work out with Yixuan and at the same time he thought he was a manipulator. Was he that different from John?

They both separated into their own places. Yibo left his friend with a heavy heart, understood that he needed help and support but he also understood that Yixuan wouldn’t accept it yet. It was one of those moments when loneliness had more healing effect than a friend’s shoulder.

Friday came. He had no trips that day, that’s why Yibo spent the whole day in the garage, managed to call his mother before dinner and then in the evening went on duty in John’s house.

Zhou Lianzin met him at the door of the house, said right away:

“Let’s go to the backyard, roof tiles crumbled, you’ll see.”

Yibo climbed to the roof, left a note to William then sorted out the storage room for Mrs. Zhou. She said he could spend his work hours in the kitchen or in the living room or, if anything, they’d call him.

As Yibo understood, his main task for that evening and night was not to let strangers in the house and to be a helpful hand if anything. Okay, well, he could do it. He’d already found some old newspapers for himself that were left in the living room by someone. He had something to read tonight.

And then the main door opened and Sister Ursula came into the house with some boy.

Nooo... oh not, not today…

Yibo didn’t know the name of that boy. He was about eight or nine. The boy was sat with a straight back on the high chair and Sister herself went up to John’s study. Yibo was standing and looking at the child: he was kicking in the air with an absent look, and was sitting silently and downcast.

Damn hell... But he felt even worse when the front door opened again and Xiao Zhan came into the house.

Their sights clashed almost immediately. Yibo felt as if his throat got strangled by the metal wire, Xiao Zhan froze and turned pale.

“What are you doing here?”

“Working instead of the chauffeur,” Yibo answered huskily, “I’m a replacement chauffeur now.”

To ask why Xiao Zhan was there was meaningless. Yibo knew the answer to this question.

The man averted eyes, came to his student.

“August, have you already been upstairs?”

The boy shaked his head in reply and humbly clung to Xiao Zhan’s sleeve, as if seeking protection from his mentor.

“Good. When Sister Ursula comes downstairs, don’t hurry upstairs, okay? I’ll talk to John first.”

The boy nodded silently and kept sitting quietly, trying to be absolutely invisible, as if it could save him.

Yibo started to shake inwardly, he understood he couldn’t just stand and look at all that, approached Xiao Zhan, grabbing him by the elbow and tearing him off the boy, leading him to the side:

“No, Zhan!” he exhaled, almost inaudibly, “Don’t, don’t go to him!”

The guy saw that Xiao Zhan was ashamed, he was burning all over but overcame his shame, lifting moist eyes to his beloved.

“And who then should?” he nodded at the boy, “He?!”

“I will,” Yibo didn’t understand what he could do to divert John’s attention.

“What are you going to do there?” Zhan asked with bitter irony, “Yibo...”

“I don’t know!” he bit lips in desperation. “I’ll say I need to talk to him! Tell him I need to discuss Jessica-Ann's death!”

“Yibo...” Zhan’s smile was faded and sad, “He’ll just turn you away... He can turn away me too,” the man carefully freed his elbow from Yibo’s grip.

All that annoyed him, drove Yibo crazy, all the impossibility of this situation... But he didn’t know what to undertake and what he could even do to cut this Gordian knot, how to do it so no one suffered in this situation?...

But he had no time to draw up a plan: Sister Ursula went downstairs and immediately winced, having seen Xiao Zhan.

“You again?” she said unfriendly through her teeth, “Have you come to interfere with the boy's blessings again?”

Xiao Zhan wass looking at her coldly, the way he had never looked at Yibo.

“None of your business, stay out,” the man went upstairs while she was going down. He blurted to her over his shoulder, when they separated, “Give me five minutes.”

“Your victories will be over one day,” she said confidently but Zhan just lifted his head higher and quickly ran up the stairs.

Yibo was standing below trying to calm down his emotions that were off the scale so much they were even difficult to think. He clung to the railings so strong his knuckles went white. Sister Ursula glanced at him suspiciously but didn’t say anything, went to the child and stood in anticipation.

In several minutes Xiao Zhan appeared at the top of the stairs, looked down at them:

“Sister Ursula, lead August away,” Zhan told her, “I’ll stay.”

She resented:

“You’ve grown up to be a selfish and greedy person, Brother Zhan!” Yibo looked at her, not being able to believe his ears, and she continued, “When you were a child I liked you more! Those years you were sharing more willingly!”

Zhan didn’t say anything to her, just glanced at Yibo and hid on the second floor, closing John’s study door behind him.

“Let’s go, dear,” Sister Ursula told August and took him by the hand, “Today you aren’t getting your blessing just because someone is greedy for attention...”

It seemed to Yibo that the boy visibly perked up when he was following Sister, leaving the hated house. And Yibo stayed. With the thought that Xiao Zhan was there, upstairs, with John…

Some angry, protesting shouting was ripping him apart, Yibo started to rush around the living room, not knowing what to undertake so as not to give Zhan and him away... To try to break into John’s study? He’d just turn him away, wouldn’t open the door. To run to Yixuan? What would he tell him? Moreover, they’d probably tell Yixuan to wait behind the door as well. What to do? What?! One thought flashed in his mind: to burn damn down this freaking house.

But, of course, it was fraught with the fact that he not only would just get back to the House of Laborers, but more, Xiao Zhan or he himself or Yixuan could suffer. O Lord... What to do?...

Then the door upstairs opened, then closed quietly, then he heard light steps down the stairs. Xiao Zhan... so fast?

Yibo looked at him confusedly. They were standing alone at the stairs, Xiao Zhan looked embarrassed and ever so guilty.

“Nothing happened,” he sighed with semi-whisper, “He couldn’t get hard.”

Yibo covered face with his hands and sat on the first step of the stairs, being afraid to burst into tears out of the huge relief that waved through his body. As if god'd heard his prayer…

“Sorry, Yibo,” Zhan whispered to him, suffocating, sitting beside him, “Sorry for... making you live through it all...”

Yibo was breathing: in-out-in, once again and slower. He had to calm down. It was over. No one suffered, no one was raped, they were lucky as ever, damn…

“He told me it was my fault,” Xiao Zhan said bitterly, “Told me it was because I was too... too adult. He doesn’t like me anymore. Told me... not to come instead of boys again. Prohibited me... Oh, Yibo, what should I do now?...”

I’ll kill him, – Yibo simply thought, and he was excited by his inward confidence and calmness the thought came with, – I’ll kill him tonight.

He put hands away from his face and looked at them as if they belonged to a stranger.

How should he do that? He didn’t have many options. Just to asphyxiate him or stab.

Sure, they’d find him. Maybe he’d be killed in this hecking sect. But no, enough. He was done. He had to do it.

“You know, Xiao Zhan,” Yibo told him extremely calmly, not recognizing his voice, “I’m sure everything will be alright. He’s just used to fucking everything that moves. Maybe he felt himself a god. And today the reality struck him. It turned out he’s just a human... It turned out, he’s getting old... He’ll come back to his senses. Start to take some Viagra, will get friendlier to you, don’t worry... Go home. Go back to sleep, Zhan.”

The man leaned with his forehead on his shoulder, almost crying:

“I’m so sorry. I’m so ashamed. I didn’t want you... to see me here.”

“Go back home, Zhan.”

“I’m so sorry... Promise me that we’ll talk about it later, okay?”

Yibo gritted his teeth. Breathe in, breathe out.

“I promise. Go, get to bed. You shouldn’t hang around here. They’ll see us.”

And again Yibo felt Xiao Zhan wanted to kiss him but couldn’t resolve. He wiped his face, stood up.

“I’m so much to blame, but you see: I have no other choice. Sorry, Yibo, I don’t deserve you...”

“Zhan...”

“Sorry. I’m going. Sorry. See you tomorrow, Yibo. I’ll try to make something so we’ll see each other. I’ll tell you when.”

Finally the guy went away.

“Still it’s easier just to stab him,” Yibo thought and went to the kitchen for a knife.

The house sunk into the sleepy quietness. The last time Mrs. Zhou in her domestic robe looked into the living room for him, smearing her hands with cream. If anything, Yixuan and her are in the neighboring wing. Yeah-yeah, Yibo nodded, it’s going to be alright, he’s sure. He’s sure. Lights were turned off almost everywhere, they left just one small floor lamp for him. Yibo was sitting and listening to the solitude, keeping a knife in his hands, then took off his shoes and went upstairs, trying not to make the floorboards creak.

Did he understand what he was doing? Fully enough. Did he realize it? Barely.

If he was asked later what had exactly happened to him then the best word could be – “delusion”, “obsession”. A psychologist could say – “lost his nerve.”

Later, after everything happened, Yibo was afraid of himself. He didn’t know he was able to commit a murder. It wasn’t the same as to throw a baton above the fence being afraid that something horrible was coming from under the ground. It was a planned and cold-blooded murder. Well, just an attempt to murder.

Yibo found himself at the door of John’s bedroom, tried carefully to turn the door handle, but the door, of course, was closed from the inside. You wish, ha! Well, he should’ve expected that. Wang Yibo turned back, went downstairs, wore his shoes and quietly went outside, cornering the house on the right. John’s windows were on the second floor, Yibo approximately understood where his bedroom was. And, oh yes, great luck, one of them was opened. So welcoming…

Yibo calculated how to climb there better. In general, it was possible. From the window-sill on the first floor he needed to step on the protrusion under the window of the second floor, he just had to pull himself up, he’d bulked up here a lot, carrying bricks at the building site... Easy. It’s going to be alright. Yibo took the knife handler with his teeth and climbed up. He pulled himself up and carefully threw his leg over the frame, looking into the room. That’s right, that was John’s bedroom. John’s bed, and his gray head on the pillow. Yibo threw his other leg over and sneaked into the room, opening the window wider. He seemed to himself a hero from some Japanese ninja movies. Taking a knife in his hand, Yibo approached his bed, stopping near.

I’ll kill you. I have to kill you. You deserve death. Enough. Enough, it has to be over. You bring so much troubles and grief, too much pain. Someone has to stop you. You have to be stopped. Just finish all that.

To cut your throat. Fast, with one merciless abrupt move. Go, Yibo. Do you remember how you had been to the farm with your parents to their friends at Thanksgiving? Do you remember how uncle Frank had slaughtered a pig? Fast and without hesitating, then John wouldn’t even wake up. Would die in his sleep, like a holy.

Damn...

Collect yourself, Yibo. Why did you even come here if you weren’t going to do it? Go…

One more step. Yibo was very close. The hand with a knife was shaking. John was sleeping. An average human being. Just a human being. Will die in his sleep…

Damn...

Yibo raised his hand. In his dream, like a holy…

Like a holy... Painless... Like a holy... holy…

Damn!!

Yibo took a step back. Angry. Angry and shaking, but understanding he wouldn’t do it. No. Fuck, John didn’t deserve such a luxury death. Oh no…

Hear, you? – Yibo thought and started to cry. Cried soundlessly, trembling with all his body, choking on snot, standing in the quiet of the bedroom where his enemy was sleeping peacefully in front of him, – You don’t deserve to die quietly and painlessly in your sleep, dickhead... You need to suffer. Every day and hour of your life. That will be fair. So you’ll be hurt, ashamed, scared and unbearable like every your Nightingale was at your fucking blessings, bastard. So you’ll choke on your shame for everything you’ve done to Zhan! I won’t kill you, not because I’m afraid... Just because you don’t deserve my life, old prick, you don’t deserve my future! I’ll lock you into prison, for what it’s worth. I’ll die but you will spend the rest of your life rotting in prison. I’ll fuck you in court, bitch, and you’ll know who’s alpha here, fucking pedophile... I’ll rip your ass with my proves, I’ll laugh into your face... and you’ll see that “great and terrible” John Cole was fucked by a simple seller from a hardware store in Anthony, a former schooler. It will be your lesson, you shithead, I wanna see your humiliation, I’ll fucking buy myself a place for the even in the first row.

Yibo sighed out and covered eyes with his hand, stepping back once again. Then he glanced at the sleeping man the last time and sneaked through the window the same way he’d got here. He came back to the living room through the main door, placed the knife back into a stand, sat in the chair and half-lidded his eyes. He was under the effect of adrenaline for several hours more, then he got a hangover: he was struck by a huge tremble, then came back to his senses and realized that he almost became a murderer that night…

Oh Lord, god, Virgin Mary…

It seems I’m going mad here, – he thought and exhaustedly closed his eyes, waiting for the dawn to disperse all the thickened darkness.

Chapter Text

Saturday. Morning.

Right after the shift at John’s house, having barely had breakfast, without sleep, Yibo headed to the communal meeting, to see a person he had wanted, no, who he had been going to, kill just two hours ago. Strange feeling, to be honest.

The fear he experienced afterwards hadn’t left him yet, but still gave him some unexpected feeling of... supremacy. As if all of them gathered here only because Wang Yibo had granted John life. That was true. He granted that mercifully, with hope for high justice. Live, you, bitch.

Silly, of course.

John was reporting that they finally got a reason for joy, a birth of a new baby in the community and tomorrow's holiday. But Brother Cropp suddenly raised a hand, like at school, willing to say something, and John turned his benevolent gaze to him.

“Yeah, Brother Cropp, speak...”

“John,” he started, looking at the rest of the Brothers in the half-empty Assembly Hall, “I think I’ll speak for most of us... in the face of such a joyful event... Can I ask you for our women? Forgive them. At least, those who belong to the Familials. They are our mothers, daughters and wives, they haven’t committed any crime either against you or the community, none of them tried to escape, on the other hand... They give birth to our sons, multiply our community...”

The rest were sitting quietly, waiting for the leader’s reaction. Miserable cowards... Yibo squirmed. Damn, he needed to sleep. It seems, everything was taking him off balance.

John surveyed the men, asked kindly:

“What would you say, Brothers? Will we forgive our women once again?”

Laughs waved through the Hall, someone blurted “yeah!” and “let’s forgive them!”, John smiled too.

“Well, I think, for Familial women we can at least cut some slack.”

Brothers applauded and shouted cheerfully, supporting his decision.

“At least,” he said jokingly but arrogantly, “someone should still organize a celebration for us.”

Men laughed flatteringly.

After the meeting and the announcement through the loudspeakers that the punishment would be removed from the Familial women, Yibo just wanted to come back home when Yixuan stopped him:

“How’re you, Yibo? You look absolutely shattered.”

Yibo shrugged only.

“That’s true. I was at the night watch at your house...”

“Really? I didn’t know that. I thought someone from the Familial was on duty...”

“I was for him,” he smiled crookedly, “And you?”

Yixuan mirrored his smile.

“No idea. Well.. see you tomorrow?”

Yibo nodded. His mentor stepped aside and right away Seung Yeon took his place.

“Yibo, I know you have a day off tomorrow but we still need to go to the hospital for Sister Cropp and the newborn.”

“Yes, sure,” Yibo nodded, “ I see.”

Some more steps left to his house where his bed was standing but Xiao Zhan aligned with him.

“Yibo...” he didn’t even know what to say, he looked so ashamed.

“It’s okay, Zhan. I’m okay. Just need to rest...”

“Tomorrow after the celebration, Yibo. Can you?”

The guy nodded again but went away, having said nothing more. Wang Yibo was worn out, he really was tired. So much that he didn't want to see even Xiao Zhan. Just let him... sleep.

He went to the shower, took off his clothes quietly and fell on the bed. Thank god no one bothered him anymore.

Brothers woke him up accurately only for dinner. Menz said:

“Yibo, wake up... You need to eat, and you shouldn’t sleep any further, you won’t fall asleep at night otherwise.”

The guy forcefully pulled himself away from the pillow, dragged to the shower and then to dinner. He didn’t even noticed when Xiao Zhan entered the dining, greeted everyone, asked shyly, having stopped near:

“Brother Yibo, can I sit near you?”

Yibo just sighed and without words made space for him. Zhan squeezed near, looked at him with the eyes of a sad loyal dog.

“Why are you here, Brother Zhan?” Yibo wasn’t looking at the man, eating mechanically, not even chewing.

“I want to eat with my friends,” he said quietly, still everyone heard him. Yibo felt how Zhan carefully touched his knee with the tips of his fingers, “Are you okay, Brother Yibo? You look bad.”

“The day sucks,” he said and got up, having not even finished his dinner, “We’ll see each other tomorrow, Brother Zhan.”

Maybe that was cruel. Maybe Yibo needed to stay and to show Zhan that everything was the same between them but he couldn’t. He had no resources to mask his emotions, he felt sick, he wanted to live through it in solitude.

However, Ron visited him at the House of Brothers. It seemed he didn’t see him for centuries though the man waved to him at the dining every day. Ron was in his worn out panama hat that might not have been given to the laundry even once, he was smiling as usual and fixed his delivery shoulder bag.

“Yibo! I came to you today but you were sleeping, so I decided to come to you once again...”

“Ron?” somehow at the sight of this friendly man the guy went kinder and even smiled weakly, “Your work day’s over, why are you here?”

“It’s nothing,” Ron took his hand and they went outside and sat at the steps of the terrace, “I brought you a trip schedule for the next week, and Seung Yeon said that you’ll go to take Sister and a newborn from hospital.”

“Yeah, Seung Yeon managed to tell me this morning...”

“Such a joy, isn’t it, Yibo? A new person!” Ron’s face beamed, he attentively looked at his friend and recalled, “Oh, I have something else for you!”

“For me?”

Having dug through his bag, Ron took out a souffle wrapped in colorful wrap, squashed and crumpled. Maybe the man had brought it everywhere with him for several days and had kept this sweet for “a rainy day”.

“Here,” he handed it to Yibo, “It’s crumpled a bit but the taste still hasn't changed...”

Yibo carefully took the present, feeling as the lump formed in his throat, corners of his lips lowered, he tried to keep himself collected though, but still not being able to withstand he cried over that souffle, feeling as his friend was silently hugging him at shoulders.

Wang Yibo buried his face into Ron, was crying quietly, keeping the souffle at his heart.

“It seems Brother Yibo stepped on the Path of Challenge,” he said knowingly, “That’s what John wrote about in his second book.”

Yibo sniffed and wiped away snot, pulled away a little, sighing shudderingly.

“It seems I lost my Way, Ron. I forgot what I am here for”.

The man shaked his head sympathetically.

“But you recalled now?”

“Yeah, probably,” Yibo was sighing and even hiccuped a couple of times, absolutely fell apart, like a baby girl, “But I’ve lost myself, Ron. This place changes people...”

“It doesn’t,” he said confidently, and at that moment it seemed he was an absolutely normal, healthy person, “It unfolds you differently”.

“Has it unfolded you?” Yibo looked up at Ron.

“Sure,” he nodded, “Now I know more about myself. And I know more about this world and I understand people better now.”

“Is it good or bad?”

“Neither,” the man shrugged, “Don’t you just fight against everything you get, just get it gratefully, even if you think it’s something bad? Everything is here for something.”

“Ron...” Yibo smiled, “You say as if you've written more than one book about psychology.”

“No, why, these are John’s words, the third book, about life lessons on the Path,” he smiled, “You’ve read it too, Yibo.”

“Sure, I did...” he hummed, “But I seemingly didn’t read properly...”

“You know what they call you in the community?” he asked. At that moment Ron was already more like himself, “Your nickname is Savior Yibo.”

The guy was startled:

“I thought I was Robin Hood or Princess’ Toy...”

“Noo,” he laughed, “Savior Yibo. But the Savior also needs to be saved. You know, like on planes? First put a mask on yourself and whatnot...”

“You think I should help myself first?”

Ron nodded.

“Yeah. So eat the souffle right now. Don’t share with anyone. Go, Brother Yibo, you need it.”

Wang Yibo’s chin trembled but he unwrapped the souffle and ate it to the last crumb and Ron was looking at him smiling. Then he patted his friend’s shoulder and got up.

“Rest, Brother Yibo, I’m leaving now. Good night.”

On Sunday after breakfast Yibo and Seung Yeon went together to Las Cruces for Mrs. Cropp and her newborn son. The child’s father stayed at the community to get ready for celebration.

After the healing souffle and having caught some proper sleep, Wang Yibo felt much better. He was even uncomfortable that he had fallen apart, had got carried away by emotions.

“If you want,” Seung Yeon told him from the front passenger seat, “turn your music on. I don’t mind.”

“Something not more ancient than the 70s, yeah?” Yibo smiled, twisting the radio wheel. He didn’t seek anything specifically, but Queen just got him, “Oh, this one is good! Did you hear it, Seung Yeon?”

The man shrugged vaguely. But Yibo was swept by some feverish joy, perked up and started to sing along to Freddy Mercury:

“I've had my share of sand... Kicked in my face... But I've come through and I need to go on and on and on and on!” he was singing, smiling and looking sideways at Seung Yeon, noticing that from behind his seeming disengagement he was carefully peering at him, analyzing. Yibo got far more perky and sang right to Seung Yeon, talking to him with the monologue, “Weeee are the chaaaampions — my frieeeend! And weeee'll keep on fighting till the eeeend!”

Seung Yeon was looking at him as at the mad one, but Yibo didn’t give up, moved his brows, trying to make him laugh:

“No time for losers cause we are the champions... of the woooorld!” Seung Yeon couldn’t stand it anymore, chuckled and laughed, Yibo laughed too, by the way absolutely genuinely.

When they took the woman from the hospital she was telling them brightly how she’d been laboring, not missing a single bloody detail. And when they came into the community women and children were meeting the car with flowers. It turned out, that was a local custom. Mr. Cropp met them too with his sons under the common applause. The older children hugged the mother. They all were beaming with joy and happiness, someone even got teary.

Yibo changed into his dress shirt and came with the rest to the Assembly Hall, where they organized some improvised “baptizing” – had put a font with warm water and John with his sleeves rolled to elbows was dipping the crying baby into the water, then wrapped him in a blanket and showed to everyone just like Rafiki showed Simba in the cartoon.

“Our new Brother, a new member of our community!”

People applauded in ecstatic happiness. For some reason Yibo looked at it skeptically, stretching just a corner of his lips. John with a baby in his hands looked wonderfully: like an ideal grandfather. Yibo thought involuntarily if he imagined how he was going to rape this child in eight years. Or wasn’t he so fucked up?

Anyway, Yibo was sure that at least this baby boy would avoid the bitter fate of his predecessors. John wouldn’t live to this moment. Or, anyhow, his little dick would get rotten by this moment, fall asleep forever.

“What would you like to name him?” John asked his father.

“After you, John,” Mr. Cropp smiled. Yibo grimaced: yeah, men of this community could teach master classes on how to kiss asses. What did he want to get? Wanted John not to charge them for hospital bills?

The leader accepted this curtsey to him for granted, announced for everyone:

“Young Johnathan Cropp!”

And everyone applauded again.

Then there was a barbeque, a small reception. Men were served only by the Familial women, so they were running between tables back and forth very actively while the men were filling their stomachs up with meat. Ordinary Sisters and laborers were still under punishment therefore they were staying in their houses immobile. But someone raised this topic during the celebration, that it was time they forgave them, of course except those two who had escaped and had been brought back.

Xiao Zhan glanced at him worriedly or bitterly from time to time, but didn’t come up. He might have been afraid or shy... Only Sung Joo was hanging out with him and never stopped talking.

Finally, Yibo decided to approach Zhan himself, when he decided to turn sausages on a hot grill. He stood near with an empty plate as if going to take everything that was ready.

“Today’s meeting is in place?”

Xiao Zhan sighed and he felt relieved.

“It is for me. And for you?”

“I want too... to you.”

Zhan’s hand twitched because he wanted to put tongs aside and to touch Wang Yibo but held himself back.

“We can go right now.”

“It’s early.”

“Then in two hours.”

Yibo nodded, took some sausages and went to laborers to treat Ron.

In two hours he noticed how Xiao Zhan separated from the common celebrating masses and went along the wall of the Assembly House, hiding behind the corner. Yibo knew where he was going and followed him in fifteen minutes, turning around.

Curtains in the rehearsing house were tightly drawn. Yibo went inside.

Xiao Zhan was waiting for him, approached him fast in the dark of the room and embraced him tightly.

“Yibo...”

The guy buried face in his neck, breathed him. They were standing like that, hugging each other, then Xiao Zhan told him quietly in the ear:

“I was so worried about you all this time. Since Friday you...”

“I’m sorry,” Yibo said, “I’m sorry, I was a mess. I went crazy, for sure. But I’m okay now, I mean it,” at this moment Yibo understood that he wouldn’t tell Xiao Zhan that he’d wanted to kill John. Probably, he wasn’t going to tell anyone. Now he felt embarrassed even remembering about it.

“That’s my fault,” the man said, “That’s only my fault...”

“Zhan...”

“That I dragged you into this, that you became an unwitting witness yesterday of how I...”

“Zhan, shut up,” Yibo interrupted him kindly, lifting up his head, “Just kiss me.”

And Xiao Zhan kissed: strongly but gently like only he could do. Yibo melted right away. He was so tired of worries, in the end, human’s body couldn’t always be stressed out. He didn’t want to think, he wanted only to be in Xiao Zhan’s hands, and the man touched his forehead with his own and told him everything that Yibo had told Xiao Zhan himself before, like a mantra:

“We’re getting out of here, do you hear me? We’ll live in a big city, hold hands at public places, watch a lot of films and eat fast food on weekends. I’ll make you pies and you’ll teach me how to dance. And we’ll go to the ocean, and we’ll have a cat and a dog...”

“Zhan...” Yibo ran a hand down his back but he wanted to feel warmth of his body under the fingers, the velvet of his skin but not the linen of the fabric. Yibo took Zhan’s shirt out of his trousers and placed hands under it, and leaned to him with his lips.

Zhan kissed him more impatiently, pushed Yibo against the wall, hovered over him, putting one hand against the wall and placing another one on Yibo’s neck. They both flared up, stress flowed into passion, Yibo kneaded the skin of his beloved under the fingers, pressed crotch against him, more and more. Xiao Zhan slipped in his mouth with a tongue, and was kissing him assertively and powerfully. Today he was a consoler, he took a leading position. It was unusual, but Yibo didn’t mind that. He could do everything with Xiao Zhan. He just trusted and gave himself into his hands and lips. The Savior also needed to be saved…

“Zhan...” Yibo sighed out, grinding into him with a crotch once again so he would finally notice and stroke him.

“Okay, Yibo...” he was breathing into Yibo’s neck, put his hand away from it and placed it on Yibo’s crotch, squeezing sweetly. Kissed under his jaw, whispered, “We’ll get out of here, do you hear me? We’ll fall asleep every night and wake up every morning together ... Yibo... I’ll follow you wherever you want...”

His hand undid Yibo’s zip, stroked his cock through the underwear. Wang Yibo went moaning vulgarly, clung to Xiao Zhan, grinding against his hand. The man carefully took his cock right out of the slot of the underwear, it was already fully hard and leaking – reaction on sweet kisses of Xiao Zhan on his neck, who tried not to go too far and not to leave a hickey.

“You’ll fuck me whenever and wherever you want, I’ll be only yours, only yours, Yibo... I’ll please you with my mouth in the morning if you tell me, I’ll give myself to you where you tell me, whatever you want, Yibo...” he started to jerk him off, whispering all that. Wang Yibo was melting, closed his eyes, giving himself away to the feelings. Knot in his chest went loose and tight in the bottom of his stomach, he was good, he wasn’t thinking about anything, didn’t want to think. There were only Xiao Zhan’s wonderful fingers that were stroking his dick so sweetly, squeezed at the head, and again down, to his balls, and up along his member, circled, caressed, squeezed…

Yibo cummed, pressing against Xiao Zhan, suppressing the moan of pleasure. Zhan lightly stroked him for some time, then just warmed his limping cock in his hand and then carefully hid it back into Yibo’s underwear.

“Did I stain you?” he asked quietly.

“Nevermind,” Xiao Zhan took out a tissue from his pocket, wiped his hand, bent down to remove white drops from the floor, “I was at Seung Yeon yesterday. I had to visit him on Friday but I found out about August and... hm, you know. So, Seung Yeon told me that I’m okay now. You remember, we wanted...”

“Yes,” Yibo drew him to himself and kissed, running a hand along his crotch. He felt he was aroused there, “Why aren’t we doing it right now?”

“I’m not ready,” Zhan giggled shyly, dodging from Yibo’s wet kisses, “I’ve not prepared yet, and I still didn’t now... what we were.”

“Zhan,” Yibo looked his beloved in the eyes, “I want you to understand: everything is the same between us. I can be angry with you, hold grudges, we can argue and be embarrassed with each other but that doesn’t mean we’re not together, broke up or that I want to stop our relationships. I’ll leave from here only with you, do you hear?”

“Yibo...” Xiao Zhan gently stroked his cheekbones, kissed his lips lightly and sweetly, “If once you’d like to take your words back or if you decide to stop our relationships or fall in love with someone else – just tell me, okay? I’ll get it, I’ll let you go, I won’t interfere... You’ve already given me so much, Yibo, so much! You’ve paid your bills ahead.”

“Don’t say it,” Yibo kissed him back, “I want you to fight for me, you hear? If once I go mad and fall in love with someone else, just punch me in the face and then fuck me so everything will falll into place.”

Xiao Zhan laughed.

“Fool.”

“Alright. You’re in love with a fool.”

“I’m more of a fool myself...”

“I want to make you feel good,” Yibo pressed against Zhan’s crotch firmer, “Just like you made me.”

“Next time,” Xiao Zhan dodged from the petting, “My father will soon seek for me, we wanted to come back home together. Next week, I swear. We’ll finally make it real, you can’t imagine how I want you... that your...”

They kissed again, but Yibo pulled away first.

“You better go, otherwise I won’t hold back and will fuck you right here. Come on, Zhan...”

The man smiled, shortly kissed Yibo’s cheek and obediently pulled away.

“I’ll tell you when...”

“Yeah.”

The last kiss and Wang Yibo left first, heading back to the House of Brothers, and Zhan went to the celebration, to look for his parents.

In the House of Brothers Yibo took a shower, went to bed earlier and thought a lot about everything that’d happened to him in recent days. He almost lost his Way for real, but people he’d stayed in the community for, helped him to find it again. And Zhan. Of course, Xiao Zhan was first. Yibo fell asleep peacefully, he didn’t see any dreams.

Chapter Text

Only on Monday morning at the common wake up Wang Yibo understood that because of all the worries he didn’t even manage to learn his working timetable for this week. Had Yibo barely got up, he stretched a hand to the graphics and winced at it, trying to get awake. Oh! The guy abruptly switched into a sitting position on the bed, so it even echoed in his back: he had to go to Anthony today! With Seung Yeon again! It was noted in the graph: “Procurement of medicines”.

An ideal opportunity, – Yibo thought, – I won’t miss my chance now!

He had a lot of acquaintances in Anthony. He could stop anyone on the street and handover some message through this person or something like that. The main thing was he had to choose a really good moment and not give himself off at his first attempt.

The guy was getting ready for work in a perked up mood, even his roommates noticed that his mood had obviously changed.

Yibo eagerly waited for Seung Yeon in the garage, the men took one of the pickups that worked and Yibo left to Anthony, having turned the radio volume higher. He had even had to pretend he barely new the city because according to his legend Yibo’d lived in Chaparral before he came to the community. Seung Yeon showed him the address of the pharmacy-warehouse where the community made purchases of the necessary medicines.

To come back to Anthony like that, after more than two months, in someone else’s car, in someone else’s clothes was strange as minimum. Yibo actively looked around, trying to find someone he knew at least a little. After the guy parked, Seung Yeon opened the door to go outside and told him:

“I’ll be right back. I’ll just take the order, there are only two boxes so I’ll bring them myself.”

The guy nodded to him, waited until he would hide behind the pharmacy's doors and left the car right away. Well, they were at the outskirts of the city, they didn’t go farther. His store was far away, his former apartments were as well. What could he do? Did he need to do anything at all or proceed acting a little more and to play a well-behaved boy? Could he manage to do anything at least? But what if he wouldn’t go back to Anthony any longer? What if their main chauffeur recovered faster then Yibo would get another chance to come here?

And then the guy heard a painfully familiar voice behind:

“Wang Yibo?!”

He jerked on his place, turning back. How could he be so lucky?! At the very first attempt!

Wenhan was standing nearby with a bag in his hand, his excitement fighting even such an obvious tiredness. He might have been after the night shift. Well, definitely, Wenhan’s bar was right in this area.

“What are you doing here?! I thought you were in Chicago... How long’ve you been back?” he bombarded him with questions.

Yibo started to worry not knowing what to start with and he still had too little time. But he forgot that his former flatmate was such a chatterbox.

“What are you wearing?!” Wenhan approached him and hugged, patting his back, “You look like an old man... and... bro, my friendly advice to you: change your shower gel and start to use deodorant... You what, have joined hippies? You’re forty years late, bro...”

“Wenhan, hold on, let me say a word!” Yibo understood that he had to act immediately, that he wouldn’t probably get another chance, “Do you remember where I was working?”

“In the store “Tools at Billy’s”...”

“Right! Bro, I really need you to do me a favor...” Yibo took the chain of a dog tag on his neck but noticed how Seung Yeon was awkwardly going out of the pharmacy with two small boxes under his arms.

Adrenaline stroke Yibo’s head and he ripped off the chain from his neck and roughly shoved it into the guy’s arms.

“Give this dog tag to Old Sam, that’s important, Wenhan.”

He didn’t manage to say anything else: of course, Seung Yeon noticed them, placed boxes on the pickup’s hood and came up to them.

“Wang Yibo, who’s it?”

Yibo smiled in panic, Wenhan, not yet feeling the danger, blurted out:

“And who’re you? Wang Yibo, is this your new boyfriend?”

Wang Yibo almost died at his place, Seung Yeon quickly glanced at him then moved his gaze back to Wenhan and got suspicious even more.

“Huh, come on... Of course not,” Yibo weakly tried to turn it all into a joke, feverishly thinking what he was going to do with all that. He’d deal with Seung Yeon later, that wasn’t important right now. Now he needed Wenhan not to forget about his dog tag, not to throw it into the glove compartment for all eternity, to understand that it was really important for Yibo.

“Bro,” he told Wenhan, looking him right in the eyes. “I’m not back to Anthony. I’m living now in a different place. Anthony is a funky town, Sam.”

A strange, questioning expression appeared on his former flatmate’s face. Yibo was looking at him, almost pressed on him with his gaze: come on, Wenhan, come on... think. Because besides girls and wolfing down food you so passionately like series and, especially “Supernatural”. You cannot not know that “funky town” was a code word of Winchester brothers, a signal that some of them got into trouble.

Yibo’d watched this series only till the fifth season but that was enough. Come on, Wenhan…

“Ok, Sam, bye,” Yibo patted his shoulder, “Tell Old Sam I said hello. I need to go. Go, Seung Yeon?”

The man nodded, still giving Wenhan a suspicious look, Wenhan himself was lost and smiled foolishly. Yibo sat in the car, nodded to him farewell and left, leaving Anthony behind.

He was so-so overexcited. To meet Wenhan right on the first time – incredible luck, but did he get his hint? Did he get that was a distress call? Would he go to the store “Tools at Billy’s”, would he get this dog tag to the right arms? The chain of these events would break at any moment, and Yibo wouldn’t even know. Thousands of reasons would prevent Old Sam from helping Yibo, but that was his chance, maybe the only chance, and he used it right away. Well, everything'd been done. That’s it, Yibo played this card.

Without the dog tag on his neck it felt empty, the guy even felt more vulnerable. He silently drove the pickup to the ranch, thinking about his left behind friend with some longing mixed with anger: fucking Wenhan, had he really had to say about that boyfriend shit in front of Seung Yeon! He couldn’t have known though... But damn, how was he supposed to bluff it out?

Yibo side eyed his companion, noticing that he was also eyeing him secretly. Hell, that was not good…

“That was my old friend from Chaparral, Sam,” Yibo tried to make up some more-less clear explanation, “He is working in Anthony now, wow, I didn’t know it... Such a coincidence, right?”

Seung Yeon didn’t give any comments. Asked quietly:

“What did you give him?”

“My stuff” Yibo smiled as if they were talking about some shit, “I used that chance that we met so suddenly and... I gave him our friendship talisman,” Oh well, if he was going to tell lies so he had to do it beautifully, Yibo even relaxed a little, “If you want to know, today I’ve, probably, finally really broken up with that world. Maybe that stuff was the last... hm, you know, thread, you get it? Not that’s it. And probably I should call my mom less. In the end... past has to stay in the past, right?”

By Seung Yeon’s it was hard to tell if he believed him or not. For some time they were just driving quietly, then the man said:

“Next time, if you see some of your acquaintances... you’d better go past. That’s the instruction. You’d better not talk to anyone from that world. Then it’s easier to let them go.”

Yibo silently nodded, as if of course you’re right. Then he smiled awkwardly, as though he “just recalled” Wenhan’s words.

“And what he blurted about boyfriend, don’t take it seriously,” Yibo glanced at Seung Yeon. Fucking calmness, it was nothing clear about him, “He’s always made such... stupid jokes.”

“Mmm...” he hummed vaguely.

Yibo sighed out. Ok, he’d done all he could. He didn’t need to drag too much attention to it.

“Let’s listen to anything, as a tradition?” Yibo was too worried. He needed to calm down now. He turned on the radio, but didn’t fix the wave. It hissed and got distorted all the time, and it just so happened that both Yibo and Seung Yeon stretched their hands to the radio wheel and here a lot of things happened.

Their hands touched and Yibo expected Seung Yeon to jerk his hand away, anyone would jerk it away, because they were men and barely knew each other. But Seung Yeon didn’t do it. It was like that Yibo kinda put this hand above his own and Seung Yeon didn’t take his hand away from under his palm, but vice versa. He turned his hand and stroke Yibo’s with tips of his fingers. As if Seung Yeon thought that Wang Yibo wanted to take his hand.

Here it was Wang Yibo who jerked his hand away, and some non-verbal signals he couldn’t yet realize were beating in his heart. He understood only one thing: Seung Yeon touched him!

It embarrassed him awfully, plunged him into confusion, he didn’t understand how to assess that, how to react: to laugh, to apologize, to pretend that nothing had happened?

But Seung Yeon’s next word sent him into shock:

“Yibo, are you... a paederast?”

The guy looked at the doctor with wide eyes, even forgetting they were on the road. His first reaction:

“What?! Why did you think that?!”

Seung Yeon peered into him, just like only El Rescate’s inhabitants could peer – attentively, scrutinizingly and piercingly, until the very bottom. Then he said:

“Yibo, you can trust me with that.”

“Don’t talk nonsense!” Yibo resented overly loudly, but here Seung Yeon added:

“Me too.”

Wang Yibo unconsciously pressed the brake pedal all the way down, and the pickup stopped with screech, causing a big brown cloud of desert dust around them. With heavy breathing he turned to Seung Yeon, asked not it his own voice:
“Why are you telling me this?!”

The man was just looking at him calmly, waiting while the first burst of emotions in Yibo decreased, then he replied:

“Because I know what it is to be alone. When no one understands you.”

Yibo scrutinizingly looked at Seung Yeon in response. He’d wanted to make him join their escape plan, to risk and to trust him, even had tried to make friends with him. But now, when he really got such an opportunity, when Seung Yeon made the first step himself, and what a step that was, Yibo got so afraid. He just couldn’t believe that fortune could be so generous to him and give him one present after another.

To rick right here and now turned out to be more difficult than the guy’d imagined himself. What if it was a trap? What if John had suspected something and intentionally sent Seung Yeon to him? Yibo had to decide right here and now... Oh, Lord…

“Why are you telling me this?” Yibo repeated with a hoarse voice, “What if I turn you to John?”

“He knows,” he answered calmly, not breaking eye contact with him, “Is that why you’ve come to us? Because they treat people like that badly beyond the perimeter?”

“As if they treat you better here,” Yibo said.

“You’re right,” Seung Yeon finally turned away and looked at the horizon. He was peaceful, as though he hadn’t just revealed his biggest secret to Yibo.

“Who knows about you in the community?” Yibo asked just in case.

The man shrugged.

“John, Sung Joo, Xiao Zhan... he is like us, did you know that? Is that why you made friends with him?”

“I made friends not only with him,” Yibo answered with pressure, “I did with Sung Joo and Yixuan too. Ron, Rose – they’re my friends as well.”

Seung Yeon shrugged once again, looking at the horizon.

“Just know that you are not alone, that’s it. I won’t tell anyone.”

“I’ve not confessed anything to you,” Yibo said carefully.

“That means you have an advantage over me,” he replied nonchalantly, as though it didn’t mean anything.

Yibo licked lips, started the engine again and they drove further in silence. Finally, Yibo made a decision for himself, and at that moment he feared even more than when’d hovered over John with a knife.

“How did you understand?”

Seung Yeon smiled lightly, as if being happy that he was right.

“You can say that’s my intuition... but... you’re more attentive with guys, I don’t know, you examine them. And you are so indifferent to women. I don’t understand why they think in the community that you are a womanizer.”

Because people see what they want to see, – the guy thought.

“And this friend of yours, Sam... He asked if I was your boyfriend – so naturally, that didn’t sound like a joke, and you got so worried as if you didn’t accept it as a joke... And you...” Seung Yeon sighed, “...look too much at Xiao Zhan.”

Damn... Yibo gritted his teeth. Well, it didn’t make sense to deny.

“He’s beautiful,” Yibo replied.

“Yeah, I know, everyone thinks that,” Seung Yeon responded, but his words echoed with bitterness. Then he lifted eyes on Yibo and asked quietly, “Yibo, am I beautiful?”

Wang Yibo looked at him, not forgetting to side eye the road. Seung Yeon now was so open in front of him, under an expressionless and cold-blooded mask he saw an insecure and frightened child.

“Yes, you are,” he answered genuinely, “You’re very interesting. And you have beautiful eyes.”

Yibo just said it, like a fact, without complementarity or pick-up vibes in his voice. Seung Yeon weakly smiled at him and turned away.

Wang Yibo suddenly felt light. If before that question from Cho Seung Yeon he’d been worried if that was a trap, now his fear released him. The guy was almost sure that it wasn’t a trap, and that meant that Seung Yeon found courage and opened up to someone for the first time. He risked just to support someone like him. To not be alone himself. And that was good. That was very good. It showed that Cho Seung Yeon still had a heart, and it wasn’t made of ice. It meant, he could work with him now.

Yixuan’d been collecting himself for a long time before he resolved to come up to his father. Moreover, he had made an appointment to him beforehand at Kelly, had signed himself into the timetable so John wouldn’t be able to wave him off.
Having knocked on his study, he heard:

“Come in, Yixuan,” and he came into.

The main thing was to stay confident. His dad always respected power.

The guy approached the chair opposite, sat, not waiting for the invitation, threw one leg over another.

“I wanted to talk to you, father.”

The man was looking through some papers, holding a pen in his fingers, crossed something out, not looking at him.

“Well? I’m all ears. Speak.”

“Your black file,” Yixuan responded, “Do you think it’s time I knew what was in there?”

The man arched his brow, glanced indirectly at his son over the glasses, not lifting a head, then lowered his sight back to the papers.

“I don’t think so. Anything else?”

Yixuan hadn’t even supposed it to be easy.

“I know that your black accounting is there, father. The real source of our income. I think it is long overdue you told me how in reality our money comes to us.”

“But I don’t think so,” John raised his voice, “You’ll find out when the time comes.”

“And when will it come, my time?” Yixuan didn’t give up, “I’m not a child anymore, I’ve been helping you out with deals for eight years so far. When is it finally my time, father? Are you going to reveal all secrets to me before you pass away? Will you hand the black file over to me on your deathbed?”

“I see that you’re looking forward to this moment,” the man said angrily, “What, young blood stirred, son? Have you come to challenge the alpha?”

Yixuan gritted his teeth, breathed and then answered more calmly:

“My mother’s raised me to be honorous to you. It’s not fair to compare me with... a dog, I’ve not deserved that.”

John lifted a head at him, took off his glasses for reading and squeezed the eyelids.

“Sometimes I even regret having raised you so ideally-right, so honest. I’ve overdone it, if I can say that.”

“Do you think I won’t understand?”

“You will, you’re not a fool,” John bit his lips inside, looking at his son appraisingly, “This file doesn’t give you peace, does it?”

“I have the right to know.”

“You have the only rights I gave you here,” John hissed, “You’ve just adopted the free-spirited thought from your ward, you’re an absolute disgrace and not a mentor.”

“I want more respect from you,” Yixuan responded in the same tone, “If you do not respect me like a person and a son than just show some respect to your heir.”

“Do you know you can always go away?” John lifted his eyebrows with a grin, “No one keeps anyone here. If something doesn’t match up your taste then you know where the main gates are. And take your mother with you then.”

Mentioning his mother hit Yixuan, he understood that John was trying to stir emotions in him, to suck off all his power, to stay a winner. You shouldn’t give in.

“There’s a low chance you let your family from here, your only heir...”

“Oh, just go!” John waved him off annoyed, “There will certainly be someone willing to take your place, don’t worry.”

“Don’t try to show me that mother and I don't mean anything to you,” Yixuan stayed strong, “You still brought us here for some reason and tolerated us here for many years...”

“I just felt sorry for you,” he said, “And I was mourning over... Jack.”

“I’ve never seen you mourning.”

“Don’t you dare!”

“I think you always follow your interests exclusively,” Yixuan felt more confident, “I think, you need us for the image of a traditional head of the family, that you cherish.”

John was looking at his son with disgust. Then he silently opened one of the drawers of his desk, took out the black file and threw it on the table for the guy. He abruptly collected himself, took it and opened, diving into the learning.

Almost immediately Yixuan’s eyes went wide. He casted a shocked glance at his father, turning one page after another. John was silently watching how all the colors left his son’s face, how he went weak in the chair.

“I knew, I supposed something like that but... I couldn’t even imagine...”

“Today after the curfew we’ll take a walk,” John told him, “Since you know the truth now, I’ll give you a little excursion.”

John and Yixuan were walking through the sleeping ranch. The guy felt uncomfortable because of breaking the rules, but John’s presence gave him confidence. However, what he had learnt in the black file still kept him in suspense. It was hard and scary to accept something like that but he had to see everything with his own eyes, he had no choice.

They entered the domestic block, approached the kennel where hounds were sitting waiting for their hour. They sniffed at the newcomers with interest but behaved calmly. John explained to his son:

“They won’t hurt us, we’re using another shampoo. Let’s go. They know me. Yeah, doggies?”

The men went behind the barricade, dogs sniffed at Yixuan and John and even wiggled their tails at the latter. The man calmly went to the farthest corner of the barn and cleaned the ground from the pieces of straw and dog’s excrement by the foot. Yixuan came closer and saw there was a semi-rusted hatch in the ground. John, not disdaining at all, pulled it on the ring and dragged the cover up. A dim light bulb turned on at the bottom, lighting up the metal ladder that went down.

“Welcome,” John made a welcoming gesture for Yixuan to the hatch but went first anyway. The guy followed his father.

The ladder finished in the long narrow tiled corridor. The yellow light of sixty-watt bulbs was burning somewhere.

“This bunker belonged to the polygone White Sands, was a part of the west wing but after the tests with nuclear bombs it wasn’t needed anymore,” John told him while they were walking down the hallway, it seemed to go kilometers ahead, “Then the government blocked the entrance to the main building and they forgot about this place. But I had friends at the polygon who told me about it and I purchased part of the land and founded a community here.”

“So you initially wanted to use this area for your... business?” Yixuan asked cautiously.

“Yeah,” John stopped at one of the doors that wasn’t any different from the rest and took out a big key chain from the pocket, “I already had a lot of useful contacts that time... Why not combine fun with something useful?”

He opened the old door not without difficulty and slapped the light switch.

A huge storage appeared before Yixuan’s eyes, with rows of shelves filled to the top with something that had been kept there for decades. All that was precisely covered with tarpaulins. The guy threw one of them to the side, revealing some wooden boxes.

“There are bullets here,” John said, “And there are machine guns, rifles, grenades at the other end, there is also a machine gun, several boxes with pistols.”

“Who else knows about this place?” the guy asked quietly.

“Everyone who knew either died already or are one of the Confidants, have their share from it and will keep silent until the end,” John answered confidently.

“And all of it belongs to the cartel?” Yixuan asked, startled.

John nodded:

“That’s what you’re really going to become the heir to,” he told him, “So, what do you think?”

He couldn't find words. Yixuan didn’t say anything, trying to realize the whole scale.

Chapter Text

The moment Yibo came back to the community he wanted to see Xiao Zhan right away and to tell him about the dog tag and their conversation with Seung Yeon. He had something to tell! But Ivan occupied him for the whole day and until dinner, and he already had no excuse to meddle in the Family block.

The next day on Tuesday he was also busy for the whole day with the mechanic-master: they almost assembled a pickup, ordered some details. It wasn’t Yibo to go get them but Xiao Zhan’s father by the truck, also going to get building material for the renewed building of the House of Sisters.

The fact they decided to renew the building works showed that they were going to finally free women from punishment very soon but everyone kept silent.

That was why it happened that Yibo came to the garage for work, Ivan was reading some trashy book, putting his feet up on the table.

“There’s no work today,” he told the guy.

“And my trip graphic is empty for the rest of the week,” Yibo said even a little confused, “What should I do?”

“Well, you can go to the building site to the laborers if you can’t do without work,” he said, “but if I were you I would just use the chance and make an out-of-the-plan day off for myself.”

“Good idea,” Yibo smiled at him, “Well, then I’m leaving?”

“I’ll sit here, I’m good, but you can leave. If anything I’ll find you.”

Yibo nodded and left the domestic block with relief. It was the best moment to find Xiao Zhan and talk with him. He headed to the rehearsing house, having looked at the curtains out of habit. Of course, they were open. There were people in the room. Yibo carefully knocked and opened the door just a little, looking inside. There was a rehearsal of the local ensemble. The men stopped playing, paying all their attention to Yibo, who squeezed through the gap. There wasn’t Xiao Zhan among them.

“What did you want?” asked the violinist.

“Sorry, I’m looking for Brother Zhan.”

“He’s in the Assembly Hall with the choir,” was the answer.

Yibo apologized once again and went there. Doors of the Assembly Hall were wide-open, probably because of the stuffiness. He managed to quietly sneak into, unnoticed, and sit on one of the benches, watching Xiao Zhan. He’d never seen him at work.

The man was sitting at the grand piano surrounded by children, he was accompanying them and they were learning some new song. Teacher Xiao was focused and strict:

“First voices, your party, separately,” he was playing, boys were singing, Zhan was listening and then made a remark: “Lucas, one semitone higher, once again...”

The boy sang again. Zhan waved a hand.

“Now altogether, the beginning...” and then he noticed Yibo. Corners of his lips twitched in involuntary smile but he held back, let children sing to the end, then announced, “Five minute break.”

The boys immediately scattered who where but Zhan stood up from the piano and came up to Yibo.

“Brother Yibo, what are you doing here?”

The guy smiled at his beloved in response.

“Well, I have an unexpected day off. And I have some news, we need to talk.”

Judging by his relaxed manner, Xiao Zhan understood that the news wasn’t bad.

“Then don’t go to the dining for lunch, we can eat together here, in the storage room.”

“With great pleasure,” Yibo shrugged, “I’m absolutely free and all yours.”

Xiao Zhan smiled happily, then came to one of the students, a teenager.

“Vincent, how’s your throat today?”

“I’m better, teacher Xiao,” he responded.

“Let me see,” Xiao Zhan held the guy by the cheekbones when he opened his mouth widely and took out the tongue, “It’s still sore. Are you gurgling it with the tincture doctor Cho prescribed you?” the boy nodded, “Okay, today you aren’t singing anyway, alright? Moreover, I have a task for you... get to my house and tell my mother I’m having lunch at work today. With a friend. If she could make lunch for two and you’ll bring it here, okay?”

The boy nodded and with a light step left the Assembly Hall.

“Can you sit here and wait for me?” Zhan asked, Yibo confirmed with a smile and then the man got back to work.

It was pleasing to watch Xiao Zhan: Yibo stuck on him and was high because he could watch him like that unhindered. No, definitely, to become a Brother was a very right decision.

The guy fantasized how Zhan would sing only for him. He would surely ask him for it. Then imagined them in bed, naked Xiao Zhan with bare collarbones and how he would sit on the bed and start to sing for him, being a little shy.

That’s how two hours passed. Vincent came back with a basket, filled with various jars. Xiao Zhan let the children free earlier, and Yibo and him locked themselves in the storage room of the Assembly Hall for lunch.

Xiao Zhan hurriedly took out all his mother’s dishes from the basket: two chicken broths with herbs, chicken with scrambled eggs, peas, some stewed cabbage, white bread and jar with marmalade, even a jug of milk.

“So many...” Yibo said shyly.

“My mom cooks like a Chinese,” Xiao Zhan explained, “The main thing is that there should be diversity, even with small portions.”

“Are you going to cook like that for me?” Yibo smiled when Xiao Zhan handed him utensils in a paper tissue.

“If you behave,” Zhan answered, “Well, speak.”

Xiao Zhan gave Yibo all his chicken right away, putting it into his bowl, the boy said confusedly, not being used to accept such care:

“Zhan...”

“I know they give Brothers less meat than laborers,” Xiao Zhan said in a tone which brooked no contradiction, “Tell me what news you have.”

“Yes, teacher Xiao,” Yibo teased him, “Well, when I worked in the store I had a replacement guy, Sam, he’d been at war...”

And Yibo told Xiao Zhan about the dog tag, about their agreement with Old Sam and about how he’d met Wenhan on his first trip to Anthony. When Yibo reached the moment Wenhan had asked him if Seung Yeon had been his new boyfriend Xiao Zhan almost choked. And when he started telling him about their conversation in the car he got so worried that he even lost appetite.

“And you what, told him?!” Xiao Zhan hissed at Yibo, because despite that they were sitting locked in the storage room he was afraid to speak in the top of his voice, “Yibo, you could have done nothing more stupid than this!”

“Zhan, I still think...”

“Seung Yeon is John’s lover! Still! Everything he knows John sure knows too!”

“Zhan, Seung Yeon asked if I thought he was beautiful...” Yibo interrupted him and then he broke off, went quieter, looked at the guy suspiciously, “If he wanted to bring me to light, wanted a confession then he’d have recorded our conversation with some voice recorder, I dunno, he wouldn’t have asked me about it. It wouldn’t even have come to his mind. He would’ve asked me if I liked someone in the community, he’d have digged in that direction, but he asked about himself! Spies don’t behave like that...”

Xiao Zhan didn’t argue anymore, just looked at Yibo with a frown, then asked:

“And what did you answer?”

The guy looked at Zhan surprised and said unhurriedly:

“The truth...”

“What truth?” an abrupt question, “Do you consider him beautiful?”

“Zhan, are you jealous about me again?” corners of Yibo’s lips twitched, “This time to Seung Yeon?”

“Are you avoiding the question?” and here Xiao Zhan threw a pea at him. Just one pea, but it startled Yibo so much, the guy burst out laughing, “Disgusting Wang Yibo! What did you tell him? Say it!”

Another pea flew at Yibo, then another one and another one, the guy stood up at his place, hovering over Zhan and cupping his chin into a gentle embrace.

“A little drama queen Zhan, I didn’t even know that you have it in you...”

Instead of an answer Xiao Zhan grabbed his hips with hands and buried his nose in Yibo’s stomach, rubbing his face against it like a dog. Yibo stroke his hair, said quietly:

“I said he was pretty cool...”

Xiao Zhan winced and tried to bite Yibo’s stomach through his shirt. Wang Yibo beamed a happy smile.

“But he is not to compare with you, Zhan,” a quiet-quiet confession, “Because you are really beautiful. So much that I catch my breath sometimes.”

Xiao Zhan lifted his head and they kissed.

Yixuan was at his father out of a special invitation. That happened rarely. As a rule, John called for his heir only in case of a special announcement, because of work. This time, the moment he sat opposite to his father, he threw a black file at him with words:

“This is a copy of mine. Since you know everything now, you’ll take part in this business too.”

Yixuan took a file without saying a word, looked through it.

“I also notice no joy on your face,” John noticed, “That’s what you’ve wanted for so long. What’s the matter?”

Yixuan glanced at his father and asked, choosing words:

“Tell me, was there at least any sincerity when you were founding the community and what doctrine you taught people? Or those were just... a cover? So they wouldn’t nose, mess..”

“What do you think?” John answered with a question.

“I'd still like to believe you... you really wanted to create a special Community where everyone could find their own Salvation.”

“If you want to believe it then do it,” John said and chuckled, “Here everyone believes in what they want.”

Yixuan just pressed his lips.

Saturday. At the morning meeting John made an announcement that he forgave Sisters and laborers and, though the burden of their blame was huge, his mercy and softness were huger and it was time he made them some considerations. Of course, everyone supported that. Therefore, on such a happy note, it was decided to organize a dance party on Sunday.

After the meeting Xiao Zhan approached Yibo, trying to look more natural.

“Brother Yibo, are you going to the party tomorrow?”

“I am. And you, Brother Zhan?”

“I will,” he said and added with some subtle meaning, looking Yibo in the eyes, “I think, this time there will be a lot of fun. I’ll specially prepare for such an event.”
Yibo understood his hints perfectly and even snorted.

“Please, get prepared, Brother Zhan. See you!”

After the meeting he, like the rest of them, went to the building site to help laborers. They were making a foundation. Ron and Yixuan worked alongside him, so Zhan didn’t approach, wisely working at the other side of the area. They would have a few hours alone tomorrow. Sweet, passionate, scorching – so he shouldn’t be greedy. Let everyone see that they aren’t so attached to one another.

On sunday Yibo languished, not knowing what to busy himself with. He tried to read but his attention constantly switched to another side, drawing in his imagination Xiao Zhan who he would take for real this time, for the first time since he’d lost his virginity almost three months ago. Oh, it would be a tremulous, indescribable moment!

However, to think about that was also bad, because the guy started getting aroused.

He wanted to distract himself, maybe go to Yixuan, to try to eventually talk to him, he might push his mentor towards his goal once again, but Yixuan didn’t accept him referring to his busyness. Yibo didn’t insist. In the end, nothing good would come out of hurry and pressure. He had to act only at the proper moment, otherwise he would alienate Yixuan from himself then.

Finally the evening came, men were happily preparing for the party. For that short time when the female part of the settlement had been punished, the male part managed to miss them. Boys were dressing up parrot-like, handing deodorants over each other, fresher shirts, breath fresheners if someone had such a luxury and other stuff.

Yibo himself precisely washed himself in the shower, and then, recalled how Xiao Zhan’s body influenced him when he just touched him, he decided to jerk himself off. He would be more resilient then. At the end, it would be bad if he cummed right at the moment he penetrated Xiao Zhan’s body. It would be even... disrespectful.

People started to come into the Assembly Hall much earlier. Yibo came there with his housemates, assessing the situation. In general, it was like the last time, but Brothers and Sisters were more excited.

Having entered, he approached Sung Joo and Yixuan right away, greeting them and getting a comment from the first one:

“At least Brother Yibo looks like a normal person and not like a painted monkey! Women have overdone it this time, haven’t they? Yibo, maybe I can dance with you?”

The end of his line was heard by Xiao Zhan who approached them next, glancing at his friend questioningly-suspiciously.

“Oh, here’s Brother Zhan!” Sung Joo wasn’t ashamed at all, “Now you start visiting events like that? Look, you don’t even have to drag him! You start having fun, don’t you?”

Xiao Zhan didn’t react to Sung Joo’s bantering. Yixuan asked:

“Are you going to dance tonight?”

“I think, I’ll have to,” he shrugged, glanced briefly at Yibo, “Otherwise, offended women will rip me apart.”

“Did you decide to try your luck too?” Sung Joo asked, patting Yixuan’s shoulder, “You told me, you’re not a fan of it...”

The man smiled and shrugged.

“Actually I wanted to talk to Yibo...”

“I’ve come to you today,” the guy told him.

Yixuan nodded, fidgeting at his place.

“Although... maybe, not today.”

Yibo saw that his mentor was experiencing some kind of inner struggle. You can’t help a person when he’s not asking for it, right? But Yibo really wanted Yixuan to ask him, he was even waiting for it.

However, he didn’t have to think more about it. The music was turned on, the evening started.

“This Petula again,” Sung Joo sighed, “I wish they turned on something else... Okay, lads, I’m leaving now. You also don’t sit still here for long.”

It was seen that he felt like a fish in water at this party. He confidently asked Sister Katarina for dance and she agreed, and the rest of the girls gave other still free Brothers come-hither looks.

“Yixuan, look, Sister Clarice can’t take eyes off of you,” Xiao Zhan told him, “Come on, go to her. Once you’re done with it and then you’re free.”

Yixuan suddenly gave him a cold look and asked:

“It that a torture for you?”

However before Xiao Zhan managed to say anything he really headed to Sister Clarice and asked her to dance.

Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan were left alone.

“He seems to know something,” Zhan said slowly, squinting.

“I’ve not told him anything,” Yibo said a little bit confusedly, “Are we good today?”

“Of course,” Zhan’s voice changed, became softer. “What about you?”

“Yeah. What are we doing? Shall we take someone to gazebos and then run away?”

“I’ll go away just like that,” Zhan shrugged. “It’s more of my way. And you can take anyone...”

Yibo saw that this plan didn’t really sit well with Xiao Zhan. He told him conciliatory:

“I still have to maintain my reputation as a womanizer, Zhan. It’s a good shield.”

The man didn’t respond. The first song finished. Sung Joo and Yixuan came back.

“I might dance for the whole evening,” the first was beaming, “So cool...”

“I’m going to take one more and then go home,” Yixuan said in his turn, “So what, have you chosen girls?”

A slow composition just started, Yibo smoothed his hair back with a hand, said decisively:

“We have!” and approached the younger sister of Miyami, Megumi.

She blushed and went to dance with him with great pleasure. Xiao Zhan hesitated a bit, it surely meant leaving comfort zone for him, but they’d agreed that each of them would dance at least one time. Therefore he approached the left Sister Clarice who’d told him off for doing nothing last time and he invited her for a dance under the surprised exclamations of others.

Xiao Zhan was dancing just like Wang Yibo had taught him once: he rolled from heel to toes, absolutely awkward, but Yibo’s heart filled with gentleness each time he looked at him.

He still had to discuss something with Megumi – they were having a small talk but when the musics stopped he asked her:

“Shall we go to gazebos?”

She lifted a brow in surprise.

“You seem to have such a style, Wang Yibo: you ask to gazebo the first one who dances with you?”

He wasn’t ashamed at all, he didn’t care at all, just shrugged.

“I think, yes. I don’t like scattering over.”

Megumi chuckled:

“Well, I’m not going to leave for sure so we can go.”

She took him by hand and led him to the exit, lively whispers surrounded them. Yibo turned to his friends: Yixuan smirked, Sung Joo gave him thumbs up, Xiao Zhan wasn’t fun but he understood the hint, noodded vaguely.

Yibo intended to stay with Megumi just a little and then leave under a specious excuse. They were talking about nonsense again, Yibo patiently waited during one more song. The music was perfectly heard in the backyard. Xiao Zhan had to leave already, he might have been waiting for him in the rehearsal house. The guy was just a little nervous. Their dialogue with Megumi faded, folded and they fell silent and then Yibo “grasped”:

“I’ve almost forgot!” he even tried to show some frustration on his face, “My mentor wanted to talk to me urgently!”

“Yixuan?” she frowned, “Would you like me to call him?”

Guilt stinged Yibo’s gut: the girl was pretty nice, and yes, he perfectly understood that he was being a total prick.

“Not really, he’s not left yet, he might be waiting till I return. Can you excuse me?”

Probably no one man in her life had ever been so polite with her. She blushed.

“Good...”

“Do you want to go back to the party or would you like to go home?

Megumi shrugged.

“I don’t know, maybe, the party...”

Damn, that was bad. Then everyone would understand that they had barely spent ten minutes there.

“Don’t go,” Yibo blurted, “to the party.” He licked lips and touched her hand with the tips of his fingers. “I don’t want you to dance with anyone else...”

Megumi’s eyes went wide. Yibo understood that here, in the community, that was almost a relationship offer as if he told her “let’s date”.

Good Lord will strike me down some day, – the guy felt his ear go burning. The girl was too embarrassed, confused but answered timidly:

“Okay... I’ll go home.”

Yibo smiled.

“We’ll see each other in a week, alright? On the Saturday meeting.”

She nodded and smiled, leaving the gazebo.

“See you, Wang Yibo.”

“See you, Megumi.”

She left, periodically glancing at him back incredulously. Yibo smiled and waved at her. When the girl fully disappeared from sight, he dived into the shadow of the houses and, along the wall, in small runs reached the rehearsal house.

The curtains were tightly drawn.

Yibo sneaked into the little house without knocking.

“Zhan?”

“Yibo?” he heard from near the window and saw a black silhouette of a man who opened the vent because it was too stuffy in the room.

Wang Yibo came up to him and embraced him from the back, breathing in the scent of his hair, pine shampoo, body and sweat, covered the neck of his beloved with kisses.

Xiao Zhan turned in his embrace, took Yibo’s face with his hands, kissed him greedily, sneaking into his mouth with a tongue.

Weak pleasing breeze was blowing from the vent, music was heard from the distance from the Assembly Hall and they had little more than two hours before the curfew. Each minute was a treasure.

Wang Yibo untucked Zhan’s shirt out of his trousers, reaching under it, greedily squeezing his sides. The man licked lips, reached into a pocket and took out a little metal can out of it.

“Look at what I stole from Seung Yeon’s cabinet,” he giggled conspiratorially, like a teenager. That was a little can of Vaseline.

“You’re a criminal too?” Yibo dragged out, lightly nipping his lower lip, and then they started to quickly undress because they didn’t want to waste any moment of their treasure time. Yibo had never really undressed so fast. He pulled Zhan to himself, feeling high because he was smooth and warm and already so hard under his underwear. He kneaded his buttocks a little bit roughly, went along his jaw and lower with kisses, the man gasped and twitched a little, whispering just at the end:

“Please, Yibo, not roughly...”

Wang Yibo broke himself off: he hurried too much, was too greedy like a beast who wanted just to take. He couldn’t be like that... not with Zhan.

“Do you have a blanket here or something...”

“Yeah, I’ve brought it beforehand,” Xiao Zhan reached into one of the cupboards, taking out a folded blanket. He spreaded the blanket out on the floor. It was going to be rough, but they didn’t have any other options, and they still wanted each other so eagerly that they didn’t care about comfort. However Yibo didn’t force Xiao Zhan to stand on his knees and elbows but he laid him flat. Hovered over him, kissing scorchingly, took the underwear off of him. Xiao Zhan was so exposed now and vulnerable that Yibo’s soul even fluttered. He carefully stroked him, slowly but surely heating him up, touched across his chest, brushing his nipples, over his stomach, under the belly, over his thighs. He massaged his balls until he started breathing deeply and loudly, gently cupped his hard cock. Xiao Zhan’s eyes burnt, he reached to him for a kiss – and Yibo gave it to him. Xiao Zhan leaned on his back again, squeezed his eyelids, bit his lips but eventually started moaning quietly and then moved hips towards his hand.

“Hush, you’re so fast,” Wang Yibo whispered and smiled, “We don’t want to finish with just some mutual jerking off, right?”

His fingers slid lower, to Xiao Zhan’s rim. He knew that the man had prepared for their meeting but stretching was still necessary so Yibo found a little Vaseline jar on the floor and generously scooped some with his fingers. Zhan was lying, having obediently spread his legs, just his Adam’s apple twitched, and he heard his barely held back sighs. Yibo caressed him with a left hand, and fingers of his right one he injected into his hole. The man sighed deeply and tried to relax more, to open himself more, towards him.

Yibo was so painfully hard himself, but he’d already decided, much longer ago than he entered Zhan, that today was an evening for his beloved. The guy still blamed himself for cumming with him so fast. Yes, they didn’t have a proper sexual routine, but today he would prove to him and himself that he could satisfy him, and not in four touchdowns.

“If that’s painful you tell me,” Yibo told him, kissing his knee.

“It’s not painful with you,” Xiao Zhan told him, just like at their previous time.

“Don’t give me that heroism,” he said, adding the third finger, “I need you safe and sound, before that, during that and after.”

Xiao Zhan didn’t answer, just nipped at fingers of his hand, holding back moans that were leaving him. Wang Yibo was caressing him so deliciously there, stroke his fingers time after time... Jeez, how long had he been waiting for this, he had even had dreams about how they would do it...

“Yibo, if you proceed, I’ll come untouched,” Zhan wheezed and Yibo took his fingers out carefully.

“Hush, don’t, just wait for me, I’m here...”

The guy quickly took off his underwear, lay near, taking Xiao Zhan in his embrace. They kissed, he placed himself under him not fully, only with thighs, helped himself with a hand. Tip of his cock rested against the slicked stretched hole, Xiao Zhan was lying with one of his sides on his chest, turned his face to him, their lips were so close... and they were looking each other in the eyes. That was good... Yibo wanted to see Xiao Zhan, each of his emotions, when he moved up just a little from below and dipped the tip into him and then the member till the middle. They both let out sweet moans and leaned to each other with their lips.

“God, so good...” Yibo said.

“I wanted it so much...” and Zhan.

Yibo gripped him tighter: his beloved man was in his embrace, he was inside him, he was looking him in the eyes, was kissing him and he knew that his feelings were mutual... Was there happiness stronger than this?

“I love you,” Yibo blurted, he didn’t regret it at all. Lord, he’d wanted to confess to Zhan since their very first date, and now, of course…

Xiao Zhan froze, peered into him and beamed with a smile.

“I was waiting for these words... I knew but I waited till you’d say them,” Xiao Zhan leaned to Yibo again, briefly pecking his lips and whispered in them, I love you too! I really-really-really love you!”

He gasped at the last word because Yibo moved his hips more bottoming him out. The guy held Zhan partly on himself, burying his face into his neck, moved his thighs up, slid, pressing the man against himself and sometimes stroked his hard member. They lost in pleasure for some time. Xiao Zhan didn’t move, just moaned, Yibo felt that orgasm was approaching him. Xiao Zhan was too sweet, too narrow and hot... No, he couldn’t finish before him, not today.

Think about Xiao Zhan, not about yourself, – flashed in his mind, – His pleasure, not yours.

It eased him a lot, Yibo helв out for some more frictions, then he had to freeze at the bottom, waiting out the most powerful push to orgasm. Xiao Zhan understood that, pressed against him with a cheek, ran fingers through Yibo’s hair, caressing.

“Don’t go to John anymore,” Wang Yibo suddenly said, “Even for the boys, please, don’t.”

Xiao Zhan sighed out:

“Yibo...”

He held him tighter in his embrace, burying his nose into Zhan’s neck, hiding his face, but the voice still betrayed him:

“Please, Zhan... you can’t even imagine how that... hurts.”

Xiao Zhan sighed heavily. Yibo saw that his request was selfish. He actually asked him to choose him and not the children, asked Zhan to step over himself for his sake. Yibo was sure he’d reject him. He was even ashamed of his own words. That was a moment of weakness, he didn’t restrain. But Zhan said:

“Good.”

“What?” Yibo lifted his face at him.

“Good, I won’t go to John anymore.”

Wang Yibo blushed all over and pressed his lips against his beloved’s, changed his position slightly: laid his partner on the floor fully, turned his hips on the side, supporting his legs and started to work with his hips more intensively, and Xiao Zhan burst into moans. He tried to reach his hard cock with his hands but Yibo stopped them, squeezed his wrists and whispered:

“No, you will be able... untouched... you promised me untouched...”

He himself floated at some pre-orgasm phase: feeling perfectly that he could cum on a whim, Wang Yibo caught his inner balance where, it turned out, he could stay for a long time. The main thing was to think about his partner and not about himself.

“Yibo...” Xiao Zhan painfully arched, he was sweaty all over, like Wang Yibo, he agonizingly wanted to come but he lacked something, some trigger, “I can’t... can’t...”

And here Wang Yibo placed a hand on his neck. Just remembered how Xiao Zhan had cum like that. Yibo felt bitter knowing where it’d come from. He understood now why his beloved had such a fetish in asphyxia. They would definitely work with it. Later, there, beyond the perimeter. In a cozy room of a psychotherapist. And here his man painfully needed to come, and he abruptly released the moment Yibo had slightly locked his fingers on his neck.

Then Xiao Zhan’s butt started to pulsate and contract around his dick, here Wang Yibo was unable to hold back more and cum right into his man, looking him in the eyes. That moment of a mutual simultaneous orgasm, and even with an eye contact, became some new phase of their relationship. They lived through that without words, just leaned to each other in the same moment in a deep, passionate kiss.

Wang Yibo fell on the floor. He was good, free and almost weightless. It seemed he would take off right away…

“What time is it?” Xiao Zhan whispered, trying to feel his trousers in the dark of the room. It was almost fully dark outside, curtains muffled the fading light, and though their eyes had already been used to half-light it still got more difficult to see. There was a little cheap nightlight in Zhan’s trousers, dim and dying, it looked like a plastic candle-tablet. However, with the help of it Zhan was able to see the clock on the wall.

“We still have an hour and ten minutes till the curfew.”

“Please, tell me we’ll do it once again!” Yibo pulled Zhan to himself, “We always scatter after just one orgasm.”

“You know that we’re already lucky that we have these orgasms at all,” Zhan lay on Yibo’s chest, placing his chin on his own fist, “You know that we risk every time?”

Yibo had a strong wish to tell Xiao Zhan that he’d wanted to kill John, but the guy was keeping silent, lost in his thoughts, stroking his partner’s back. Zhan started to dream again about what they would do when they were free from the ranch:

“I’d like to see that Disneyland of yours and try to drink, you know, so heavily. And I’d like to see snow, not in the film, but real... I’ve never seen snow, even in China... I don’t remember it.”

Their conversation smoothly slid to the worn out topics: they talked about Yibo’s escape plan again, argued, discussed how they would manage to find out about the videos and where they were stored. Yibo hypothesized that he would press on Yixuan once again, and he would probably agree to collaborate and find the disks.

“I can’t believe that Yixuan will betray his father,” Xiao Zhan said, “I don’t believe anyone here now, except you.”

“How much time do we have?” Yibo whispered instead, and Zhan squinted again, looking at the clock on the wall.

“Half an hour.”

Wang Yibo’s hands were on Xiao Zhan’s buttocks, kneaded, played with the parts.

“Maybe enough discussions for today? Mm? Once again?”

Xiao Zhan laughed, he couldn’t refuse to him. They kissed, getting aroused again, Zhan climbed on top of him, at first he just sat on Yibo’s hips, rubbed himself against him. Wang Yibo slightly drew himself up on the elbows, took Xiao Zhan’s dick into the rings of his fingers and started to stroke him sweetly with a tongue. Zhan moved a little bit further into Yibo’s lips, put a hand behind his back to stroke Wang Yibo’s member.

They spent two more minutes with mutual caressings, finally, Yibo dipped his fingers again in the little jar of Vaseline, generously smeared it over the rim, penetrating it a little bit. There’d been not so long, Xiao Zhan was still perfectly stretched, therefore he placed himself on him, holding Yibo’s dick for himself just a little.

A guttural moan left Xiao Zhan’s mouth, louder than usual, when he bottomed himself out. At that moment he was hella hot, and Yibo was jealous of himself. The guy didn’t move, letting Xiao Zhan to dance on him, and the man moved his thighs in come chaotics motions, back and forth and then up and down, rested his palms on Yibo, threw back a head then looked at his partner again, biting lips but then he saw how Wang Yibo’s eyes went wide out of some primal fear, and he wasn’t looking at Xiao Zhan but behind his back…

...and Wang Yibo saw how a huge shadow rose silently behind Xiao Zhan...

At the same second Xiao Zhan felt as someone grabbed him by the hair and ripped him abruptly from Wang Yibo to the side. The light flashed in the room, blinding them both, two people threw themselves at Yibo simultaneously, and John went into the rehearsal house with a relaxed pace, like a movie star on the red carpet.

“Well, well, well,” he said almost joyfully, pulling one of the chairs to himself, “And I thought, Xiao Zhan, that you love only me.”

Chapter Text

When they pulled Xiao Zhan off him, Wang Yibo had barely managed to understand anything. Two torches pinned him down right away and the lights hurt his eyesight. When he heard John’s voice he knew that was the end. That’s all. They wouldn’t escape.

“Well, well, well,” John said, sitting himself on the chair, “And I thought, Xiao Zhan, that you love only me.”

Zhan stood on his knees on the wooden floor, someone grabbed a hold of his hair and, having seen who had pinned Yibo, he felt sick: twins Chuckie and Dickie, John’s cutthroats who no one even called Brothers in the community. One of them pressed his knee on Yibo’s throat, and the guy wheezed, reddening, and Zhan dashed to him:

“Yibo!”

But at the same moment the one, who was holding his hair, wrung his arm behind his back, sharp pain struck his shoulder, and Zhan cried, gritting his teeth.

His scream threw Yibo off the floor reflexively, he moved to Zhan, but they were even harsher on him: one of the twins swung a leg and hit him in the groin. Despite the knee on his throat Yibo screamed wildly out of pain. He’d never screamed like that. And he’d barely ever experienced something like that.

“Yibo!!” Xiao Zhan shouted not in his voice and struggled furiously in the grip despite the torn hair and pain in his arm, “Yibo!!”

The room disappeared in front of Yibo’s eyes, everything was flooded with the pain in his groin, as if through the thick water column, he heard what John was telling Xiao Zhan:

“Don’t scream, otherwise I’ll order them to hit him to death.”

Zhan silenced himself momentarily. He looked at the leader with glass-like eyes, full of horror, the man winced, frustrated:

“Did I tell you, Xiao Zhan, that you are dumb? God, that’s right.”

“You’ve let your guard down,” Victor's voice sounded from above. He was the one who’d wrung his arm! “Got so carried away that didn’t even hear as the door opened.”

John grinned, glancing from one naked man to another. Xiao Zhan sat on his knees, with his whole body stiffened and watched every John’s move. Wang Yibo wheezed under the twins, still curling his toes out of pain in his groin.

“And you switched me over to him?” a careless gesture towards Yibo, “Have preferred this little piston over a normal dick? Asians don’t have such big sizes and you’ve been used to this since your childhood... Has he even satisfied you?”

Xiao Zhan was silent. Victor wasn’t holding him firmly anymore, only by his hair. He fully dropped one arm. John understood that they wouldn’t definitely have a small talk but he really wanted to talk:

“Wanna know who framed you?” he asked casually, as if something like that happened between them every day. Yibo was silent, still coming back to his senses, Zhan was afraid to say anything now so the man answered his question himself:

“So, what do you think? Where did you fuck up?” silence again. Then he sighed and eventually answered, “That was Isaac. He told me Yibo left somewhere at night. The old man barely sleeps, you know, so many worries... His daughter was a lesbian, and now she’s left. He told me, hoping that I would be easier on his daughter if I caught her. Old fool,” he sighed, scratched his brow, throwing one leg over another, then suddenly recalled something and took real police handcuffs out of his pocket, “Dickie, here, get it... It’ll be helpful.”

“Thanks, John!” the man caught handcuffs on the fly and together with his brother bent Yibo’s arms behind his back and cuffed them, rolling the guy on his back right on his locked arms.

“First, I thought that you were just so sad that I’d forbade you to come to me,” John proceeded, now talking only to Xiao Zhan, “And, God knows, it’d have been better to be true. I would... understand and even... would blame myself for that to some extent. After all, you’ve always been my boy, Zhan, my Nightingale. I trained you for myself, and that’s now your fault that you’ve grown up and became so... unattractive. That was what I thought first: that you were desperate and seduced our new Brother Yibo. But then... I suddenly remembered that you liked to go out at night too. Brother Victor told me, right, my friend?”

“Right,” the man said, “We didn’t know something like that about Xiao Zhan earlier though.”

“That was a thread I pulled,” John continued, “then all the pieces of mosaic came together all by themselves. All the suspicious details I’d noticed about you before, everything strange, what I felt in Wang Yibo – all of that got an explanation, if I suppose that he was that exact “friend” you found beyond the perimeter.”

Xiao Zhan gulped heavily, and Wang Yibo bit his lip. No one of them knew if it was worth trying to persuade John it wasn’t true. What did he really guess? What did he know? John answered that question of theirs:

“I thought about how soon after that incident this guy had appeared in the community and how fast you’d made friends, and clear, genuine hatred of Yibo that he’d confessed me about right before his Initiation and even how affectionately you’d been hugging him from the back right in front of my eyes when we put him down after the “flying”... Details, details, they can tell you a lot if you open your eyes... But the one who finally untangled that knot... Victor, wonderful, isn’t it?” John chuckled, “Victor, tell him.”

“I reminded John that we’d kept the phone with the number of that friend of yours. And just for the sake of the experiment I offered to turn Yibo’s phone on and to call him from your’s.”

Wang Yibo’s heart sank. That’s all. John knew it all. Xiao Zhan whispered with his white lips:

“Phone calls history...”

“Isaac, sure, actively supported us in our experiment. And you can’t imagine what I felt when this bastard’s phone called then in the warehouse...” John’s voice filled with bitter, “You hurt me, babe.”

Xiao Zhan lifted a condemned sight at John. It looked like he was ready for anything.

“Wasn’t it me who raised you?” there was a crease between his brows that Xiao Zhan was always afraid of, “I know you wanted to have... someone close, like a dog, that’s normal for kids, they want to have a friend... But you can’t let a dog in the master's bed!” he cried, but immediately collected himself, sighing out. He told Xiao Zhan in a mentor’s voice, like a teacher:

“I can’t hurt you too much, Xiao Zhan. You’re my baby, my Nightingale, I’ve always cared about my boys... But him,” he nodded at Yibo, “I can. I’m sure it’ll be the best lesson for you. You’re not a fool. You’ve always made the right conclusions.”

John nodded to twins who were always waiting for his command. And hits and kicks piled on Wang Yibo like a halestorm. First, they hit his jaw, cutting his lip, then nose, under his eyes, and then again the same place, then someone kicked him in the chest. He coughed with blood and instinctively rolled on his stomach so as not to choke on it. Hit proceeded on his sides, buttocks, back, hips…

“No!!” Xiao Zhan cried again, struggling with Victor, but this time not in the direction of Wang Yibo, but of John, “Please, no! John, no, I beg you!”

Victor finally let him free, and the guy dashed to the leader’s legs, clinging to his trousers and hands:

“John, I beg you, please, stop it! I beg you, John, please!”

The man looked down at him condescendingly, chuckled, took out a little key for the handcuffs from his pocket:

“Do you want it?”

“John, please!” Xiao Zhan howled, his whole body trembled, he clung to John’s knees, trying to catch his hand, “Stop it, don’t do that, don’t kill him! Don’t hit him, John, please!”

The leader just silently undo his trousers, freeing his semi-hard dick. The atmosphere was right to his tastes:

“You know what to do.”

Xiao Zhan desperately nodded, crawling closer. Victor turned away delicately but the twins kicked Yibo not so harshly now, without the same passion. They seemed either to wait for John to stop them finally or they just wanted to look.

Xiao Zhan took him in right away to the bottom and John patted his cheek in a praise:

“If you make me come in ten counts I’ll tell my guys to stop,” and pushed his thighs towards him, “One...”

Wang Yibo heard those horrible growling sounds, getting that Xiao Zhan was raped in the throat the meter away from him. It was so painful that the physical pain didn’t seem so hard anymore... He groaned hollowly, not being able either to move or roar. There was only pain-pain-pain around him, nothing except the pain and despair, and also the feeling of absolute helplessness.

“Two... three... four.... such a good boy, Zhan... five... you’re still my best boy, best of the best... s-six... oh, Zhan... your mouth it the best part of you... seven... baby, it seems... you’re winning in this fight... eight... mmm... ni... nine... Ten!” he pressed Xiao Zhan’s face into his groin, firmly fixing him, and poured into him with some poor substance that scorched on Zhan’s tongue immediately.

Having come, John loosely waved at the twins and kicks stopped. But at that moment Yibo wanted them to continue and bring the situation to the logical end — so shitty his soul felt.

“Good boy,” John smiled and patted Zhan’s cheek, and then he put the key right into his mouth, “You can play with it.”

He buckled his pants fast and business-like, smoothed his hair, straightened his shirt. Having nodded to Chuckie and Dickie, he left the rehearsal house with them, leaving them alone.

“Yibo?” Xiao Zhan dragged thinly, crawling to his beloved and, first, freeing his hands from the trap of handcuffs. They fell flat along Yibo’s body who was lying still red all over from the beating, slowly turning purple. Future bruises and hematomas bloomed on him like patterned brown flowers, “Yibo, please, talk to me...”

Xiao Zhan was crying, turning Wang Yibo on his back with trembling hands. When he saw the guy’s swollen face he couldn’t hold himself back and howled out of pain. Zhan was afraid to touch Wang Yibo, just his hot tears fell on his beloved's chest. Wang Yibo felt them and, more, he felt the smell of someone else’s sperm on the lips of the men he loved.

“Yibo... god, please... Yibo...” his trembling fingers pressed against the guy's neck, what could he feel though when his hands were shaking so badly.

Wang Yibo understood he had to let Zhan know that he was alive, conscious, it was just unbelievably, painfully difficult for him to breathe. However, when Xiao Zhan tried to feel his pulse on the wrist, the guy weakly grabbed his hand, forcefully parted his lips stuck together with blood and managed to say as much as he could:

“Xi... Zh... don’t cr...”

He, of course, cried even harder but this time partly out of relief. He placed his palm on Yibo’s cheek and slightly rocked back and forth, and out of the half-opened window the music was coming from the dance party, where Petula sang and sang...

Xiao Zhan waited for the signal for the curfew and only then ventured to take Wang Yibo out of the rehearsal house. The community was sinking into quiet sleep, watchmen still hadn’t gone out for a checkup. By Wang Yibo’s condition he understood that it would be unreal to put clothes on him. Xiao Zhan tried at least to pull the underwear on him but it was painful to Yibo to even lift his thighs for it. Then he decided he would just wrap him in the blanket stained with blood, where they first had passionately made love and then with the same passion his beloved had been beaten. His perennial tearfulness also hurdled Xiao Zhan but what could he do... He couldn’t stop crying, it happened itself just like that. The men constantly wiped his face, it hurdled him so badly too.

Xiao Zhan wrapped Wang Yibo and tried to lift him, putting hands under him. It turned out to be so hard, because Yibo was a tall guy, almost the same parameters of Xiao Zhan himself, and yeah the latter was not as physically developed and strong as Yibo. He managed to lift the guy but he understood that it would be really difficult to carry him to the house. Yibo moaned hollowly to each of his movements.

“Dear...” Zhan said helplessly at the end, “I can’t carry you, I can’t... Let’s try and get up, okay? Maybe I’d drag you at least... please, let’s try...”

Yibo weakly succumbed, as if he barely understood what the man wanted from him, constantly moaning from pain.

“Get up, Yibo, here... lean on me...”

But when Xiao Zhan tried to throw his arm over him, he burst into more moans and even said couple of times:

“Hurts... it h-hurts...”

He barely stood on his feet, sinked to the floor, and Xiao Zhan cried desperately, not knowing what else he could do but then he eventually decided to carry him in his arms, even with some breaks for rest. He took Wang Yibo bridal-style, because only in this position he painfully cried less. It was hard but Xiao Zhan didn’t give a shit anymore. He carried Yibo, wrapped in a blood stained blanket, in front of him, only hoping not to drop him. On a seemingly short way to the house he had to take breaks to rest and put Yibo right on the earth. At the end his arms shaked so much out of the strain, he gritted his teeth but kept carrying.
His father opened the door with words:

“Where the hell have you been after...” and he froze, looking at his son and at his load, “What happened? Who’s that?”

“Out of my way,” Zhan said rudely and squeezed into the hall, not putting off his shoes, immediately going directly to his room upstairs. Stairs — that was the final obstacle but his father followed him and outraged:

“Who’ve you brought here?! What’s going on?! Who’s that?! Tell me now!”

Xiao Zhan pushed the door of his room with his foot and finally carefully put Yibo on his bed. He really wanted to lie immediately, just a little, but he couldn’t afford that, he had to do so much now…

He pushed his father out of the room and followed him out, locking the door behind himself. The father looked at him angrily, frowning:

“Who’s that?!”

“Brother Yibo,” Zhan replied flatly. There was no emotion left in him to deal with his father, and to have any fight with him either.

“What happened to him?!”

“Chuckie and Dickie beat him on John’s order.”

His father understood everything right away. Or the biggest part of everything, at least the main: his son’d gotten into some unpleasant incident, turned against John.

“Why did you bring him here and not to Seung Yeon’s medical post?” the man roared.

“I’m afraid to leave him at the medical post,” Xiao Zhan’s voice twitched, “Anyone can come there. I’m afraid they’ll kill him.”

Father and son looked each other in the eyes long and intently, then suddenly the senior Xiao swung his arm and shortly slapped the junior:

“How dare you?! It’s not enough that you disgraced yourself but you brought the shame into the house, to your parents?! What position are we in now?! How dare you turn against John?!”

Xiao Zhan outraged all over, not really from the slap but from his father’s words, exploded in anger within:

“Was it me who disgraced you?! How?! Because I got involved with a man?!” he made a step towards his father, he was shaking all over. Not only out of the decades-long held grudge, but out of all the stress he’d lived through this evening, “It was you and mother who made me like that! You are the disgrace!”

“What?!

“It’s because of your silent permission that John’s molested and raped me since my childhood!”

Mr. Xiao gasped shortly and pursed his lips and Xiao Zhan pushed further:

“Don’t you tell me that you didn’t know, that you didn’t guess... I told you about it, tried to tell! But you put me under John, you did everything so that his mercy didn’t leave our family. You were ready to do anything, even paid with your son!”

Mr. Xiao grabbed ahold of him and shaked:

“Don’t you dare say such words about John...”

“Out!” Xiao Zhan roared at him and pushed him away. Never, not even once in his life had he talked to his father like that and was like that with him. The man recoiled and even seemed confused... “Don’t mess with me and don’t nose into the room, you get it?!”

“It’s my house!”

“If I commit a suicide,” Xiao Zhan suddenly said to his father and he gasped again, “you won’t have any house. You and mother will be placed into the houses of Brothers and Sisters. So you have this house only because of me. So get out of my way. Go into your room and don’t mess with me!”

They looked at each other in some silent fight, then eventually mr. Xiao turned his back to him and left for his bedroom without any words. Xiao Zhan heard a quiet voice of his mother behind the doors, she was asking father: “What is that, then? What happened?” Enough. He couldn’t be bothered with his parents now.

Xiao Zhan went to the bathroom, ripped the shirt away and washed himself to the waist. Then he took a basin of warm water, took everything from their home medical kit, everything that could come in helpful — cotton wool, bandages, patches and iodine — and came back into his bedroom.

Yibo was lying exactly just like Xiao Zhan had left him earlier. He unwrapped Yibo from the blanket, it was a horrible sight: he was all in blood and dust, his dark bruises started to get purple. Soon Wang Yibo would turn into one big bruise, and Xiao Zhan involuntarily cried again. He soaked a shower sponge in warm water and started to wash Yibo. The guy hissed and twitched sometimes but kept lying calmly. Having washed his beloved, Zhan covered some abrasions with patches, though he understood that his help was catastrophically not enough. He had to go for Seun Yeon. But Zhan didn’t trust Seung Yeon. However, he was more afraid that he would miss some opportunity to help Yibo because of his lack of knowledge. He had to risk and trust. Or not to risk — and just rely on the mercy of fate. Xiao Zhan eventually chose the first.

But before he changed into his new shirt and headed to Seung Yeon’s house, Xiao Zhan had found keys from his own room. He’d never locked himself from parents, they always knocked on the door when they wanted to enter. But now these keys had come in very useful and Xiao Zhan thanked the god internally that he even had a lock in his bedroom door.

He covered Yibo with a thin blanket, carefully kissed his temple:

“I’ll go to Seung Yeon. I’ll bring him, I promise. Everything will be okay, Yibo, do you hear me? The main thing now is for you to pull through...”

Seung Yeon’s parents were used to their son getting woken up in the middle of the night and being urgently called somewhere. Doctor was a dangerous job, especially when you were the one like that in the whole community. So when Xiao Zhan hammered at their door at night, mr. Cho just shouted sleepily:

“Seung Yeon, go open it. I hope they came for you.”

They guy got out of his warm bed almost forcefully, sleepily went downstairs, opening the door. Having seen Xiao Zhan, Seung Yeon immediately woke up: the man’s look was so mad and his eyes horrible. He grabbed Seung Yeon by the elbow, dragging him to the terrace and pinning his back to the house’s wall:

“Fess up and tell me as it is, I’ll see if you’re lying!” Xiao Zhan smelled bad with some mixed aromas, Seung Yeon couldn’t tell, the man shook him and leaned too closely to his face, “Was it you who told John about Wang Yibo?!”

Seung Yeon expected the least that Xiao Zhan would ask him about Wang Yibo in the middle of the night.

“What?” he didn’t understand, shaking off the last crumbles of sleep from himself. “What do you...”

“I know that Wang Yibo confessed to you he was gay,” Xiao Zhan quietly hissed into his face, “Fess up, was it you who told John? Gave him up?”

Though John Cole’d told them in the rehearsal house how he’d guessed that Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo were lovers, Zhan still didn’t leave the opportunity that the leader hadn’t said everything. He suspected Seung Yeon, he, damn hell, never trusted him and now it was important for him to understand if Seung Yeon was related to their troubles or not.

The doctor met Xiao Zhan’s sight directly, turned more serious and then minted to him firmly:

“I didn’t. I promised Wang Yibo I wouldn’t tell anyone.”

For the moment Xiao Zhan peered into him, then nodded, licked his lips and said abruptly:

“Follow me.”

He was silent all the way to his house though Seung Yeon tried to ask him about what’d happened. But Xiao Zhan silently accompanied the man to himself, led him upstairs and unlocked the door of his bedroom with a key.

When Seung Yeon saw Wang Yibo in Xiao Zhan’s bed with a beaten and swollen face he got it immediately. Well, almost. Zhan carefully leaned over Yibo and said:

“Yibo... I brought Seun Yeon. He’ll examine you, alright? I’m here.”

Then Xiao Zhan removed the blanked to the side, exposing Wang Yibo’s body and Cho Seung Yeon involuntarily gasped. Despite that he was the only doctor in the community, healed ruptures in anuses, beatings, and recently had even dealt with the corpse of Jessica-Ann, so much beaten man he’d never managed to see. It was one whole bruise and haematomas. Cho Seung Yeon covered his mouth with a hand and then asked quietly:

“What happened?”

“John caught us,” Xiao Zhan said and the doctor even twitched, turning his wide eyes full of anger to him:

“Are you mad?!”

“Examine him, please,” the lips and chin of Xiao Zhan trembled, “I’m so afraid he’ll die.”

Wang Yibo looked fearfully and Seung Yeon understood Xiao Zhan’s worries. He in his turn leaned over Wang Yibo, too, and asked:

“Yibo, do you hear me? Yibo...”

The guy opened one eye with difficulty, another one was covered with bruises and swollen. He winked at Seun Yeon and even moved his fingers.

“I need to examine you,” Seung Yeon said, “If you feel a sharp pain – let me know.”

Cho Seung Yeon started with legs: moved his feet, bent his knees, asking:

“Can you move your fingers? When I do that, does it hurt?”

The same with arms. It seemed he had no fractures. But when he reached the palpation of the thorax then Wang Yibo hissed low and then even moaned.

“Where does it hurt, Yibo?” Seung Yeon asked gently, “Here? Or here?”

Screams and moans of Wang Yibo were the answer to him.

“Yibo, is it difficult to breathe? Difficult or just painful? Squeeze my hand, if it’s just painful,” Yibo squeezed, “And squeeze my hand if you feel congestion in the lungs, like when you cough, if they are full with something...” Yibo didn’t move.

After that Seung Yeon examined his neck, carefully lifted his head:

“Does your head hurt, Yibo?” the guy moaned. “How many fingers do I show? Show me the same... Right, good. Well, look at me... Do you feel dizzy? Nauseous? Do you hear me well?”

After some time Cho Seung Yeon carefully covered Wang Yibo with a blanket, and Xiao Zhan and him left the bedroom, quietly talking near the ladder:

“We need to get him to Las Cruces,” Seung Yeon whispered, “He needs to take an X-ray, or better MRI.”

“Don’t say nonsense,” Xiao Zhan broke him off firmly, “Las Cruces? John didn’t kill Yibo just because he was in a good mood. He won’t let us from here either together or separately.”

The men looked at each other in silence, then Xiao Zhan asked:

“What’s with him? He’s very... will he survive?”

“I can’t say anything without an MRI,” Seung Yeon told him, “He definitely had a fracture in his ribcage, or a crack. Maybe, a crack because in case of a fracture he could’ve already had pneumothorax. But he’s breathing without wheezing so I hope it’s just a crack. Or, maybe, concussion, that’s not surprising, considering what his face looks like. Haematomas and bruises, his lips and nose are beaten but the nose is not broken, and that’s a miracle but with the swollen eyes it is difficult to say until the swelling isn’t gone. If there are no internal injuries — Wang Yibo will survive and recover soon. But I can’t say anything without an MRI.”

“And what if there are these injuries?” Xiao Zhan asked quietly.

“Then we’ll know it within the first three days. Then he’ll get much more worse...” Seung Yeon broke himself off, not finishing, but Xiao Zhan understood him still, “All we can help him now with is to give him painkillers and sleeping pills so he would rest more. Do you have pills at home?”

“There was something...”

“Crush them to powder and dissolve in water and... it’s better for him to drink through some straw...”

They looked at each other in silence and then Seung Yeon asked:

“What are you going to do now? What’s John decided?”

“No idea,” Xiao Zhan answered, trying not to give in to despair, “The main thing for me now is that Yibo will survive.”

When Seung Yeon left Xiao Zhan took all the painkillers that they had at home and crushed them into some powder just like Seung Yeon had recommended him. They didn’t have cocktail straws, of course, but he made one with a dense sheet of paper. Having carefully given the medicine, Xiao Zhan slightly withdrew a blanket from under him, covering Yibo with the one that was better, and he made his bed on the floor near him, having collected all the blankets and pillows in the house. The sun was about to rise soon, and Xiao Zhan hoped that John wouldn't send Chuckie or Dickie right into his house to finish what they started.

Chapter Text

Signal to wakeup hit Xiao Zhan’s brains. He had never been as exhausted and empty in his life as he was that morning. But the worst was that that damn march from the speakers woke Wang Yibo. He twitched and moaned.

“Yibo, how’re you?” Xiao Zhan asked, touching his arm, “Feeling the same or worse?”

The guy vaguely mumbled, then parted his lips:

“Drink...”

“Yeah, I’m coming right up...”

Xiao Zhan went to the kitchen for water and when he got back he saw that his father was standing over Yibo. The guy dashed into his room, blocking his beloved from the parent:

“What are you doing here? Why did you come?”

Mr. Xiao looked his son in the eyes:

“Just wanted to know what condition he’s in.”

“He’s in bad condition,” Zhan minted, pushing the father off his room with his chest, “and he’ll be even worse unless I take care of him.”

Mr. Xiao looked at his son with caution:

“Do you understand what the consequences of that are, not only for you?”

“Human life is at stake,” Zhan said, “Do you understand things like that?”

Mr. Xiao clicked his tongue, as if it was useless to talk to him, and went downstairs to have breakfast.

“Yibo, are you hungry?” Zhan asked, when he got back into the room. The guy groaned negatively, “Is it difficult to breathe? Do you have a headache?”

A negative groan again. It looked like the effect of pills still held.

“I need to go to work today,” Xiao Zhan told him, getting dressed, “I need to go, Yibo, to check the situation. I might ask Kelley for two days-off if I can. I’ll come back at lunchtime, I promise. And you should have some more rest, okay?”

An affirmative mumbling.

Xiao Zhan went downstairs for breakfast. His mother, of course, gave him some meal, but the parents really intended to affect Zhan morally, so all those ten minutes he was eating they couldn’t give him rest:

“Go to John, today, and ask him to forgive you...”

“You understand that this boy will just take all of us down, don’t you?”

“Xiao Zhan, you can’t risk all that we have!”

“Do you understand that the punishment will be any, literally anything?”

Xiao Zhan was eating silently and didn’t respond to them. Then he got up in the same fashion, put his jacket on and left the house.

His first rehearsal with the choir was meant to be right after breakfast. Then lunch, rehearsal with the ensemble, the second rehearsal with soloists — and dinner. That had been his schedule on Monday for the last six years. But the Assembly Hall, where the boys gathered for the common rehearsal, was empty.

Xiao Zhan felt sick in the pit of his stomach. The lesson should have already started. But there was no one. Couldn’t they…

He heard echoing footsteps of Victor immediately and lifted his head at him. He didn’t come closer, the guy heard him perfectly just like that thanks to the acoustic of the Hall:

“Xiao Zhan, you’re resigned from the position of choir director. Not temporarily. Permanently.”

Xiao Zhan’s heart sank deep down, and his fists clenched involuntarily. He should have expected that, shouldn’t he? Did he really think that the case would be limited to just beating Yibo? John would proceed to punish him and would do it until he grew tired of it. And he wouldn’t get tired since other people’s sufferings aroused him.

“And who will be replacing me?” he just asked.

“Sister Agatha, she has a musical education, you know that,” Victor said calmly, “You could have been replaced any time. You thought of yourself as the chosen one absolutely wrongly.”

Victor, too, enjoyed that he methodically grounded Zhan into the dirt. He wondered, how long had Zhan made him mad? Maybe all his life?

“And what do I have to do now?” the guy asked not because he wanted to hear Victor’s opinion, but because he knew for sure – John’d given his helper some orders in this regard. But the man just shrugged:

“Whatever you want. You’ve exhausted the limit of trust and favor to himself. You’ve been arrogant, Zhan. It’s impossible to be favored for too long. Everything has its end,” the men were silent and looked at each other, “You can go to laborers if you want to earn your bread.”

“I have no other choice,” Xiao Zhan said, “If I’m not working then my family will be deprived of the ration of mine.”

Victor smiled:

“That’s true. See, you know all that,” and, not beeding farewell, he turned his back to him and left the Assembly Hall.

The fact they took the choir from Xiao Zhan, was predictable but not less painful because of it. He wanted to burst into tears out of helplessness but the guy understood that it wouldn’t help anything. He didn’t want to go to laborers. Not today. That was humiliating, and he had been through humiliation yesterday, the guy wasn’t ready to go for a new portion voluntarily.

Zhan left the Assembly Hall and headed to the medical post. He needed to take medicine for Yibo because he’d crushed all their homemade stock the day before. And right on the road to Seung Yeon the speakers turned on and it swept over the community:

“Brothers and Sisters! Since today and for some indefinite period Brother Xiao Ganshi has been removed from the Confidant Council. Brother Xiao Zhan has been fired from the position of the choir “Nightingales”. Sister Agatha Jansons has been appointed a head of the choir. Brother Wang Yibo is removed from the Brotherhood. Very soon a new recruitment into the Brotherhood will take place.”

Zhan almost collapsed on the road, went aside into the shadow of the nearest house, leaning on the wall.

He understood that those were the consequences, circles on the water, that it would be not just one wave, but the news was still bad... The fact that his father had been removed from the Counsel of Confidants meant that the status of Confidant itself didn’t belong to his family anymore. They became just Familial and it meant they would cut their ration, even take away some properties that weren’t due to their status. The fact he had been fired from the position of the head of the choir and they didn’t assign him to any other meant that it was just one way for him – to the laborers, and if he wanted to eat he didn’t have any other choice. But the fact that Yibo had been excluded from the Brotherhood was bad, really bad. There wasn't even any announcement that they transferred him to laborers. Who was he now? Persona non grata? Where should he sleep and where to eat? If Xiao Zhan remained the Familial but Wang Yibo wasn’t even a Brother anymore then the latter couldn’t automatically stay in the Familial house. It was against the rules and Xiao Zhan was a rulebreaker, a rebel. It meant it was an unwritten warning from John – if you’re going to harbor Yibo then screws would keep getting tightened. New repressions would fall on his family and they would even lose their home eventually. And what then? What then?

He wasn’t just afraid for himself and his family but more for Yibo. His beloved would lose the only shelter under his roof and what next? His father and him would be sent to the House of Brothers, his mother – to the House of Sisters, and what would be with Yibo?

He stood still a little, coming back to his senses. He had to do something, to act, he couldn’t sit still, idly by and wait until John changed his mind. But what did he have to do?

Xiao Zhan felt how he catastrophically didn’t have time. If they’d given them another week then Yibo would recover at least a little. If only he was back on his feet, if only Xiao Zhan understood that he would live and wouldn’t become vegetative or disabled. If only fear for Wang Yibo’s life went away. Then he would overcome everything, bear everything: losing his home and even deposition to the laborer. Time, he needed to take time…

Having taken a couple of deep breaths, Xiao Zhan went on his trip to the medical post.

In Seung Yeon’s eyes he saw that the man had barely slept and that he even felt some kind of guilt towards Xiao Zhan.

“I heard the announcement...” he said quietly when Zhan went in.

“Everyone did,” Xiao Zhan said tiredly, taking a seat on one of the bunks.

“How’s Yibo feeling?”

“I dunno,” he said and then very carefully, “I thought you’d tell me when you could come examine him once again.”

He almost caught his breath waiting for Seung Yeon’s answer. And he told him what he was the most afraid to hear:

“John called me today in his office in the morning. He said Wang Yibo hadn’t been a Brother anymore and that I wouldn’t dare help him.”

Xiao Zhan felt how a hollow despair flooded him. He couldn’t keep collected anymore, he hid his face behind palm, moaning plaintively.

“And what did you tell him?” Xiao Zhan asked, not lifting his sight.

“Zhan, what do you think I could tell him?” Seung Yeon answered.

Xiao Zhan wiped moist eyes:

“Don’t know... For example, that you are a doctor and you should save people, it’s your obligation...”

“To listen to John is my obligation too,” he replied and it drove Xiao Zhan mad. He wanted to spit into Seung Yeon face everything that boiled and burst within him, but he understood also that he still needed Seung Yeon and no one could help them now except him.

“What should we do then?” he asked and looked at Seung Yeon imploringly, “What should Yibo do?”

Seung Yeon was silent.

“Do you get that John punished Yibo for something he was not less guilty of?” those were very bold words and Zhan took risks. But his whole life now became one huge risk, didn’t it?

“Don’t say that,” Seung Yeon replied immediately, “You broke the rule, and you know that!”

“He always breaks his rules himself!”

“Zhan, don’t say that!”

It was a dead end. Xiao Zhan understood that he wouldn’t get anywhere here. He stood up but Seung Yeon called him:

“Hold on,” and then he fished out a bundle from the table, “I’ll submit these medicines as expired though everything will eventually come out if they’ll start checking on me. Here there are painkillers, ointment for injuries and sleeping pills if Yibo sleeps badly. Give him painkillers every twelve hours. The most important thing is that he shouldn’t have lungs congestion. And cough with blood. And there should be none of it in his urine. If there’s no sign of it then he’ll recover, he just needs time.”

That I don’t have, Zhan thought but accepted the bundle with great gratitude.

“Seung Yeon, and what if... if he starts coughing with blood and peeing with blood?”

“Then things are bad,” he replied. “He’d need an urgent hospitalization.”

They understood though there would be no urgent hospitalization.

When Xiao Zhan came back home his mother was crying in the kitchen and his angry father was going back and forth outraged.

“You see, it’s all because of you!” Xiao Ganshi lashed out on him from the threshold. “Drop the kid out of our house! It’s only going to get worse! What are you going for?! For us to get evicted from here?!”

“Where should I drop him out?” Xiao Zhan asked tiredly. “To lay him on the threshold? Do you have any plans for situations like that?”

“We could carry him to the House of Brothers!”

“He was removed from the Brotherhood, you heard that!”

“Then let him go back to the laborers, to recover at the medical post – I don’t care!”

“John’s told Seung Yeon to stay away from him,” Xiao Zhan said bitterly. “No one cares about Yibo, father. No one, except me.”

“Then I’ll drop him out myself,” mr. Xiao roared.

“Then I’ll hang myself in our living room like Mary Cole,” Zhan said unfazed.

Mrs. Xiao cried harder then before:

“Don’t you dare say it! What are you doing to us, Zhan-Zhan?! You’ve always been such a well-behaved child!” she approached her son and tried to grab him by the sleeve. “They said they’d come today and take away everything that doesn’t belong to ordinary Familial: our furniture, our household equipment, our conditioner...”

“Mom,” Xiao Zhan even felt thick out of her words, “are you ready to exchange a human's life for a conditioner?”

She went quiet and looked down, Zhan glanced over both of them:

“Parents, are you... are you even my parents? Were those you who raised me?” he felt scared, bitter and so horribly unpleasant. “I forgave you for turning a blind eye to.... John’s actions. But it... you’d kill him if John’d told you, right?” they were silent, and Zhan saw that they had neither sympathy in their eyes nor empathy. “I love him,” he said to move them at least with something, “I wouldn’t exist without him.”

Xiao Zhan went upstairs, opening the door of his bedroom with a key. Wang Yibo immediately stirred and groaned, attracting attention.

“Yibo, I’m here, it’s alright,” Zhan sat at the head of his beloved, gently touching his forehead with his lips. “It’s alright, dear, I’m here... How are you feeling?”

“Drink...” His lips got dry even and Zhan went down to the kitchen for water, taking the whole jug with himself. His mother saw that but didn’t argue. After he drank enough, Zhan asked him lovingly:

“Anything else, Yibo? Are you hungry?”

“To the bathroom,” he sighed out and even tried to get up but immediately groaned harshly and laid back.

“No, Yibo,” Zhan got scared. “I’d better bring you something...”

He left the bedroom to find some useless dish.

“What are you looking for?” his mother got nervous.

“Yibo needs to go to the toilet, and he can’t get up yet.”

The woman silently took out a steel bowl from a kitchen cupboard, handed it to her son and asked incredulously:

“Do you love him so much you’re ready to clean his bedpan?”

Xiao Zhan turned, looked at her confusedly and shrugged:

“Yeah, for all my life if I have to.”

In reality Zhan was afraid to even think that something could happen and Yibo wouldn’t recover from the beating. What if he stayed disabled forever and wouldn’t be able to care of himself? Zhan wasn’t scared by the prospect of taking care of him until the end of his life. He was scared that John would push them to the edge with his repressions, that he wouldn’t be able to care about Yibo, that they would just take Yibo away from him.

“Yibo, here, piss here, dear...” Zhan turned up the corner of the blanket, preparing a bowl for him. “I’m holding it, honey, just relax...”

He groaned hollowly and tried to grab this dish from his grip but Yibo’s fingers still trembled out of weakness.

“Yibo, no, I’m holding it. Relax...”

Wang Yibo turned his swollen blue-purple face away from him, said forcefully:

“Embarrassing...”

“Yibo, there’s nothing embarrassing here,” Zhan leaned to him and lightly kissed over his bruises and abrasions on his left cheek. “We are both men... And after all that we had, between us, there’s no place for embarrassment. Go... I’m not looking.”

Maybe, if Yibo could blush he would blush all over. But the boy’s cheeks had never turned a rosy color, however his ears were burning. They both understood now it wasn’t the best time to play hard-to-get, and though Yibo felt some certain internal discomfort about everything what was happening and what a helpless position he was at now, he still made and effort and pissed into the Zhan’s outstretched bowl while the latter was carefully holding it.

With inner shuddering, not out of disgust but rather out of fear, the man looked at the bowls contents but didn’t find either blood clots or pink stains. He smiled for the first time, with relief he felt. It meant, at least, that his inner organs hadn’t been injured. There was hope, there was one. Xiao Zhan took the bowl downstairs without any sign of disgust, into the toilet, and brought it back, leaving it under the bed.

“Do you want to eat?” there was only negative mumbling in response. “Do you feel pain?” affirmative response. “Where does it hurt, Yibo?”

The guy carefully lifted his hand and touched his head with his fingers, and then the middle of his chest.

“Seung Yeon told me that you have a concussion and a cracked rib. Do you feel a congestion in your lungs?” negative mumbling. It would be okay, everything might become better. “I’ll give you pills but you still can’t take them with your stomach empty. You have to eat, Yibo. At least, drink some broth.”

He went downstairs again. They heard a signal for lunch outside and his mother was just laying the table. Xiao Zhan took a tray and put his portion on it.

“I’m eating in the bedroom.”

His mother suddenly covered his plate with her hands:

“I won’t let my son stay hungry but that... I’m not going to feed him!” Xiao Zhan looked her in the eyes. “They’ve already cut our ration because of him!”

“Perfect,” the guy told her through gritted teeth, “then I’ll give him my portion.”

“Zhan!” she cried in helpless anger. Xiao Zhan ripped the tray from her hand under the frown of his father and went upstairs.

Yibo might have heard everything because when Zhan poured the broth into a glass for him and put there a makeshift straw he took two hard gulps and then leaned back on the pillows and said exhaustedly:

“You have... troubles... because of me...”

“Don’t think about it,” he said in a matter-of-fact tone. “Drink more broth. Go ahead, Yibo, two gulps is little.”

He forcefully drank everything to the end. It might have been difficult for him to keep his head steady, breath and drink at the same time but he still managed to do it and exhaustedly leaned back on the pillow and mumbled again:

“If I... don’t get up... run... away from here. Alone.”

Xiao Zhan sat on the floor near the bed, placing a tray on his outstretched legs. He started to eat not greedily but more thoughtfully, contemplating on what Yibo wanted to convey to him. Answered:

“And what am I supposed to do without you beyond the perimeter?” he took a break and then confessed: “You give me so much strength now, Yibo. I have something to fight for. I feel so strong now, really. I’ve never felt stronger in my life. And if you won’t be there so there won’t be any sense. I become myself again – miserable, weak, broken, without goal and guidance... And you remember yourself still, you told me: if we run away we’ll do it together. Nothing’s changed. I won’t leave you behind.”

“You’re not like that,” Yibo sighed out. Then he collected some more power and added, “you’re not miserable.”

Xiao Zhan finished his meal and offered:

“Maybe you could chew a little?” the guy negatively mumbled and Zhan didn’t insist this time. He finished the soup's contents and stood up to clean Yibo’s glass and crush some pills there for him. But Wang Yibo lightly touched his hand, stopping, and said with difficulty:

“Don’t be foolish. If... I am not back on my feet... leave... me. No.”

And Xiao Zhan grabbed his hand, kissed it and pressed against his cheek:

“Even if you’re never back on your feet, Yibo, I’ll take care of you until the end of life – it’s still better than if I lived my life here without you. Sometimes I imagine what could have been if you hadn’t appeared and asked me out to walk in El Paso – and I get scared. I need you in any condition of yours. I’ll never abandon you.”

Xiao Zhan didn’t want to make Yibo cry but the guy still did. A tear ran down from one of his eyes and the guy turned his face to the wall.

Xiao Zhan left and prepared medicines for him, then gave them to Yibo to take and watched as the guy relaxed. The pain was apparently getting away and Yibo soon fell asleep.

Then Brothers came into their house to take away everything they weren’t supposed to have as an ordinary Family, not related to the Counsel of Confidants: removed the conditioner from the wall, took the “excess” of household appliances and various decorations like flower pots and a couple of paintings that hung in the living room. They took everything that testified to the fact they were special. They weren’t special anymore. The house had visibly become empty and went gloomy. Mother cried on father’s chest, father was looking at Xiao Zhan accusingly. But Xiao Zhan didn’t regret anything. All that was happening on a whim, not because of some unfair mistake. Zhan fought for the life of his beloved person and cold-bloodedly sacrificed the comfort of his parents on the altar.

At the moment they announced Wang Yibo was excluded from the Brotherhood and Xiao Family from the Counsel of Confidant, Yixuan was at home, near his mother. They froze, listening to such unexpected news, and exchanged glances. Zhou Lianzin asked:

“What did your ward do?! Why?!”

“No idea...” her son responded and they both, without a word, stood up and headed to the opposite wing of the house, to the head of the family.

John was in his office, and when Kelly reported him his wife and son came together and demanded the talk, he invited them immediately, without any questions. He even had an upbeat mood today:

“Come in-come in, take a seat! I expected you to come.”

Yixuan and his mother sat in chairs in front of John’s table, there was a pause for a moment, the young man didn’t restrain first:

“Why’ve you excluded Yibo from the Brotherhood?”

“Because he is a paederast,” John answered right away and just like that.

“What?!” Yixuan and Lianzin jumped together and John watched their reactions attentively.

“You tell me you didn’t know?” he asked his son coldly. “You’ve become so close...”

“I... it... it can’t be that!” Yixuan's hand ran over his body, pulling the collar of his T-shirt, as if it was too tight. “You’re mistaken, father...”

“Alas, but I’m not,” John stood from his table, came up to them and stood in front of them, leaning on the table with his buttocks. “I’ve seen them myself in the rehearsal house. He molested one of my Nightingales, the best of the best, Xiao Zhan.”

Zhou Lianzin gasped and covered her mouth with hands and Yixuan’s face went pale:

“What did you do with them, father?” the guy was smart enough to understand that the man hadn’t let them go just like that.

John twitched nervously a corner of mouth:

“They’re both alive if you ask me about it,” he crossed his arms. “But you, of course, let me down. You both.”

It became clear to Yixuan and his mother that it was their turn to pay their penalty.

“Remind me, Lianzin, didn’t I warn you that you’d been forcing things?” the woman lowered her head but John kept pushing. “I told you that despite his age Yixuan wasn’t ready yet to become a mentor. That was stupid and naive and all of that because you’ve always raised him spineless...”

“Father, stop!” each time John started to offend his mother Yixuan got tormented. And John saw that for sure. “Don’t hurt mother! Yibo is my ward!”

“Who played you like a violin! A disgrace.. He took advantage of you and you are lucky he molested Xiao Zhan and not you!”

Yixuan didn’t say anything. He still couldn’t believe it’d happened.

“Give the file back,” John demanded coldly. “You’ve fully proved that you’re not ready to take at least some responsibility.”

“John, you know it’s not true!” Zhou Lianzin argued him with pain in her voice but her husband ignored her:

“You let your mother decide for you, you let your ward influence you. You’re a wuss and not a leader,” he concluded mercilessly. “Give the file back right today. I remove you from community business for a year. You’ll replace your ward at his position. The place is vacant now.”

Yibo just fell asleep when someone knocked on the door of their bedroom. It was mr. Xiao.

“Zhan, you got a visitor. It’s... Yixuan.”

Xiao Zhan got alert, stood up from the floor. What did he want? To finish them off? It would be stupid though. Xiao Zhan perfectly understood that if John wanted to finish the job he would send Chuckie and Dickie and not Yixuan and then no closed door could help them.

The guy opened the door quickly, left the room and locked it, covering it with himself. He almost bumped into Yixuan and his father. The latter felt uneasy in the fallen silence, hummed, saying something, and left.

“Why’d you come?” Xiao Zhan asked directly.

“They told me Yibo is at yours,” Yixuan answered.

“That’s true,” Zhan nodded but didn’t move.

“Can I talk to him?” Yixuan obviously felt awkward, most of all because he wasn’t used to talking about things like that.

“No, he’s sleeping,” Zhan said, looking right at him.

“Then... can I at least... look at him?”

“Why?”

Yixuan was really lost. He couldn’t even think he would have to explain things like that.

“Well... I'm... his mentor.”

“Not anymore. Yibo was excluded from the Brotherhood, haven’t you heard that?”

“I have...” Yixuan gritted teeth, but still said, “I just want to have a look at him, to make sure he’s okay.”

Some vague jealousy stirred within Xiao Zhan that he had never felt towards Yixuan but he still opened the door and let him in.

Having seen the swollen and bruised, beaten face of Wang Yibo, Zhou Yixuan gasped shortly, abruptly turning away. Then he sighed out and looked at his former ward again, who was peacefully sleeping under the blanket, breathing shortly but without wheezing.

“If I didn’t know it was Yibo...” he whispered.

“Yeah, Chuckie and Dickie did that,” Xiao Zhan said behind him, “by the order of your father.”

Yixuan was silently looking at Yibo, putting his hand into pockets. In a formed silence Xiao Zhan asked:

“Help us, Yixuan.” The man twitched and looked at the guy, and he continued, “We won’t do it without you.”

Brother Zhou’s eyes shifted confusedly, he sighed and asked with disappointment in his voice:

“But how can I help you?”

Xiao Zhan said hurriedly:

“The most important thing for me now is to give Yibo some time to recover. I need time, Yixuan, I need to know Chuckie and Dickie won’t break into our house in the middle of the night to finish the job...”

“I won’t have much influence on my father,” he said with regret. “He’s even removed me from all businesses as punishment. In this situation... you even have more influence on him than me.”

Xiao Zhan chuckled and nodded. Having glanced at Yibo for the last time, Yixuan sadly left Zhan’s room but stopped at the stairs and asked the guy in semi-whisper:

“Zhan, I... I’ll ask you just one question... it would seem strange and even offensive but you... answer me anyway, alright?” Zhan silently and openly looked at him in anticipation. “I don’t know what happened between you and Yibo, I have no idea what relationships you really have just... wanted to know... The reason you grew up like that here, is... is my father related to it?”

Xiao Zhan even chuckled a little: probably Yixuan finally opened his eyes and started to look around? Surprising. Or had he probably not had good reasons to think such traitorous thoughts and now there were more than enough of them?

“Yes,” he said mercilessly, not going to spare his feelings. “He is. Most directly.”

Wang Yibo woke up to dinner and everything repeated. Zhan fed him as he could, crushed medicines for him but this time he added some sleeping pills to the painkillers. He needed Yibo to definitely fall asleep, preferably, for the whole night. It would be less shameful this way to do what he wanted to do. This way Yibo wouldn't see his disgrace.

He was sitting on the floor at the bed, while Yibo was falling asleep, gently stroked his hand, told him some affectionate words and then the guy suddenly asked:

“Sing... for me.”

“What?” Xiao Zhan was caught off guard. “Do you want me to sing for you?”

The guy squeezed his hand for the answer. Xiao Zhan collected his thoughts: what would he sing? Eventually he leaned to Yibo’s ear, almost lay a head on a pillow beside him and sang quietly, really quietly, like a lullaby, slowly lulling him:

“I don't want to sleep with you
I don't need the passion too
I don't want a stormy affair
To make me feel my life is heading somewhere...
All I want is the comfort and care
Just to know that my woman gives me sweet
Mother love.”

Xiao Zhan sang to him in whisper and stroked Yibo’s hand and then he finally succumbed. Succumbed to him and the pills, and quietly fell asleep and, as Zhan, hoped, with a healing sleep. He sat in front of Yibo for a long time, thinking about Yixuan’s words:

...In this situation... you even have more influence on him than me…

That was true. And Xiao Zhan always knew that. He could sit like that as long as he wanted and hide in this room, hoping that John wouldn’t unleash his hellhounds at him. To hide behind this pathetic lock from the whole world, convincing himself they were under some relative protection. But, of course, it wasn’t true.

Xiao Zhan understood, felt that John was playing with him like a cat with a mouse. That Yibo and him were kept on his short leash now and there was only one opportunity to guarantee his beloved at least some peace for the next two weeks.

It was difficult to find courage for that. Just to stand up and go where he’d thought to. Zhan cried a little bit at Wang Yibo’s bed, not really pitying himself but more because of the guilt to his beloved. Yibo didn’t have to find out what he was going to do. It would break his heart again. He would just wake up tomorrow and it would be over. He wouldn’t even know.

“I’m sorry,” Zhan whispered quietly, kissing Yibo’s hand. “Sorry that I’m breaking my promise.”

Chapter Text

Xiao Zhan drew a bath for himself: added some sea salt with vanilla aroma for skin softness, washed himself precisely, washed his hair with hateful pine shampoo but then covered himself with a chocolate lotion. That was an odd mix of flavors but it was the best he had. Then he shaved precisely, cleaned his intestine and cut pubic hair in his groin. John didn’t like it when there was too long hair in intimate spots. Little boys didn’t have it. And he had to look like a little boy – the more the better. It was harder for him each year. It was almost impossible. Xiao Zhan knew that John slept with him for the last three years just because he was good at asking. That John wouldn’t pay attention to him himself. Zhan had stopped being a little boy or a teenager long ago, he’d lost youthful roundness of his cheeks and naive glance. But John still got aroused by the contrast of his body and soul, that Xiao Zhan found himself at each time they had sex.

Xiao Zhan’s body betrayed him every time. Since the very first time John’d made him come, jerking him off with a hand. He hated John and hated everything he did with him. He was so embarrassed of himself, was embarrassed of his reactions but still came under him every time. As though he was trained by John, his body lived apart from his mind. As thought he was labeled by his molester, as though he really belonged to him. But not with his soul, no.

Xiao Zhan told himself all the time that he wasn’t entirely his body. That organism didn’t equal love or sincere attachment. In his heart he thought of himself as a wrong, broken, ill man as long as he could get aroused because of his rapist. He despised and hated himself for that. Though this fact indeed helped Zhan to stay favored by John. That was exactly why the leader often chose him and not one of the younger Nightingales.

John was amused and excited by that contrast: burning, aroused body, giving up under his push and an unconquered, aspiring soul, being ashamed of that body. He liked to push Xiao Zhan on top of this inner controversy and defeat him – time after time. No little boy could give him such pleasure. He was so attracted to Xiao Zhan and gave him too many liberties.

“Only you and Seung Yeon get the genuine pleasure of what I do with you both,” he told Zhan once, “but Seung Yeon is not so interesting. He’s boring, I’ve read this book cover-to-cover, nothing new. Constant touchy-feely stuff, jealousy and love sighs. But you, Zhan, oh, I’m ready to read you again and again...”

John’s affection for him was like some certain stability in Xiao Zhan’s life. As long as he stirred John the situation with the boys and everything else was more or less under his control. He still could do something at least. So it became a real blow and loss of guidance when John hadn’t had a boner with him for the first time. And, though he understood, that it might have been not about him, that it was just that nature started to take its roll but that loss of power over their leader became destructing to Zhan. He had no lever of influence on this man now, he was more helpless then ever. Until John caught Yibo and him he had been most of all afraid that he would switch to boys fully and seek for arousal with them, using their young bodies. He was afraid John would get angry out of despair, would become rude and harsh with kids in an attempt to catch the tail of a fleeting erection.

When Wang Yibo’s life came at stake, fears for boys moved to the background. Now it was important for him to win back the leader’s favor, whatever it took, if only he could win more time for Yibo to recover. John had already let him understand that without his patronage Yibo wouldn’t survive here.

Having dried himself with a towel, Xiao Zhan smeared himself and stretched. John loved when they came to him fully ready. He could apologize dry and untouched butt only to the youngest who hadn’t still experienced the power of his blessing. Xiao Zhan hadn’t been like that anymore, so he prepared himself precisely, just in case.

Quietly, so as not to wake Yibo up, he put on tight, slim trousers and his best red-and-black shirt. John had bought it for him. He combed his hair to the forehead so that his face seemed younger but the last touch was the most important.

Having knocked on his parents’ room and waited till his mother’s “yeah?”, the guy looked in on her, embarrassed by his looks. His father was downstairs and his mom was sitting in front of a small mirror because they’d taken away her big dressing table when they’d come two hours ago to take their stuff. Now his parents’ room seemed empty and nondescript.

The woman abruptly evaluated her son’s looks and collected herself in some surprised anticipation: really?

“Mom,” Xiao Zhan asked quietly, closing the door behind himself, “can I take your eyeliner and lipstick?”

He had been first done makeup by John when he himself was fourteen years old. The idea would have never come to Xiao Zhan’s mind itself. He had been at another John’s blessing. They’d been alone at home: Zhou Lianzin and Yixuan had gone somewhere beyond the perimeter, John’d freed all servants and even given Kelly a day-off to stay alone with his young lover.

Xiao Zhan remembered John had drunk a little brandy and given him a sip from his glass. Zhan’s lips had scorched from the alcohol, he thought it was disgusting. But he’d liked a light feeling of being tipsy: he’d become somehow warm and easy and really fun. John hadn’t pushed him that night, in fact he’d played with him, touched him a lot, caressed. Zhan had really gone sluggish, he was drunk, relaxed and obedient.

“Go,” John told him and led the boy to the opposite wing of the house where he’d never been earlier. He accompanied him to some bedroom that belonged to Mrs. Zhou, as the teenager guessed by the female stuff that filled it. John took a sit at her dressing table where she kept all her jewelry and cosmetics, he placed the teenager on his lap.

“Don’t you move.”

Mrs. Zhou had a lot of things there: fake hair, various cosmetics, perfume and jewelry... John took a black pencil and carefully stroked it along Zhan’s eyelid. It was not really smooth but Xiao Zhan was sitting quietly and didn’t move. The unusualness of what they were doing, the intimate quietness between them — all that aroused the teenager and he sniffled forcefully, trying not to make a move.

Having applied the eyeliner, John took one of Lianzin’s lipsticks, bright red, and told him with a smile:

“Slightly open your mouth... like that, relax... “ he stroked Zhan’s lips with lipstick and shaded it with a thumb. “You could’ve been a really beautiful girl. Really beautiful...”

He styled his hair in a little bun on the back of his head and applied Lianzin’s fake hair there, making it into a specific ponytail. Then he took some round clips from her casket, applying it on Zhan’s earlobes and told him then, turning the boy to the mirror:

“Look... look, what a peach you are...”

It was strange to Xiao Zhan to look at himself looking like that, he’d never been attracted to female stuff and it looked like a masquerade.

“Do you like it?” he’d asked the man.

“It'd be okay for the sake of diversity,” he told him and sneaked into his shorts with his hands.

And then he fucked him on the bed of his wife.

“Can I get you eyeliner and lipstick?” he asked and the woman jumped from her place cheerfully, began to fuss:

“’Course, ‘course!” she sat her son in front of the mirror, pouring all the contents of her makeup bag, kinda poor, on the table in front of him. “Have you decided to go to John, yeah, my dear?”

She wasn’t really fazed, and Xiao Zhan took one black pencil and a lipstick and turned away from her to the mirror.

“You’re doing the right thing,” the woman said, standing behind him. “John will forgive you. He’s always loved you. He’ll forgive you and all of us, he might even let this guy live...”

And suddenly she cried. Xiao Zhan understood that even his mother had some clear vision of things behind the thick skin of hers. But he felt disgusted because of her tears at that moment, or maybe, because of himself.

“Mom, get out. I can’t see you.”

She obediently left. His parents had always done it — obediently left.

Two lines under his eyes, just a little lipstick so that his pale lips looked brighter. And that’s it, he shouldn’t have overdone it, otherwise it would push John away instead of attracting.

Xiao Zhan approached his house with a hollowly beating heart. It was the evening of that awfully long, anxious day. The guy’d barely slept but the high level of stress he’d been living through for the last twenty-four hours wouldn’t have let him relax.

He knocked on the door of a big white house but it wasn’t Sister who opened it to him, who should have been on duty that night, but Victor. Xiao Zhan hadn’t expected to see him. He stood, squinting, smirking with hostility:

“You’ve adapted quickly, good job, you’re clever,” he told him, “You even put on lipstick... Do you really still have hope, Zhan? After everything?”

“Step aside, Brother Victor, and let me see my leader,” Zhan told him calmly.

“You can drop the act in front of me,” he chuckled. “John doesn’t want to see you. Or you think that you have to just wiggle your flat ass and he’ll be at your feet?”

Xiao Zhan gritted his teeth and then went down the terrace with a resolute step, went around the house on the left side, approaching windows of John’s office and his bedroom. Office window was half-open.

“John!” he called with anger and despair. “John, please, we need to talk!”

Quiet. The window remained indifferently empty.

“John!” it seemed to Xiao Zhan that the man still somehow was seeing him now. “Please, talk to me!”

He fell on his knees right in front of his windows. Xiao Zhan hoped that it would open, that John would look out and tell him off but nothing of that happened.

Victor came out to him only in half an hour when it already went dark.

“How long are you going to sit here?”

“Until John talks to me,” he said, though for the last half an hour of sitting and standing on his knees pain had managed to tie down his legs and spread all over his body.

“He doesn’t want to see you.”

“Then he must tell me that himself.”

“Go away.”

“No.”

“Stubborn brassy trash,” Victor casted at him and went away.

He came back in five minutes and stretched an arm to him.

“Okay, go. John will listen to you.”

Xiao Zhan stood up carefully, not without Victor’s help, they went to the entrance where Zhan, already alone, went upstairs, knocked on the leader’s door three times.

“Come in, Xiao Zhan,” he heard and came in.

John was sitting, as usual, at his favorite working desk. Massive lacquered oak, flawless, made to last forever. Just on this table Xiao Zhan and John had had sex at least a hundred times.

John wasn’t looking at him. He looked tired, slightly annoyed.

“Turn the music on, Zhan,” he said at the moment the guy had closed the door behind himself, “and get me a drink.”

Xiao Zhan knew that manner of John to behave as if nothing had happened. That was deceiving, it dull the alertness. It seemed to a man that John had long forgiven everything and let it go but that wasn’t true. As a rule, soft carelessness and simplicity were followed by an abrupt and severe punishment. Zhan was ready for it. Otherwise gave off no sign of that. He smoothly went along the wall to a mini-bar, hidden in the niche behind the painting, near the old cd-player and even older vinyl record player. Anyway, John still collected those vinyls, managing to get the rarest samples.

“What do you want to listen to?” he asked quietly.

“Of your choice,” the response followed.

Xiao Zhan chose one of the vinyls, almost randomly. Carefully put it under the needle, the room filled with viscous, slow melody. That’s what they needed.

He didn’t ask about the drink of choice — John’s tastes had long been known by him. A little brandy, a lot of ice. Zhan moved soundlessly, with a cat-like grace approaching John, handing him a glass.

John accepted the offering, sipped, rolling the alcohol on his tongue. Asked shortly:

“What do you want to tell me?”

Xiao Zhan slowly fell on his knees, sinking in long soft carpet fibers. He knew John liked to see his boys on their knees. And better – between his legs but it’s for later. He had to first persuade John…

“I’ve made a mistake,” he sighed out, looking at John’s eyes from below.

“Have you understood that just now?” John eventually looked at him and immediately appreciated his light makeup. Corner of his lips twitched.

“No, I understood that right away,” Xiao Zhan said quickly. “But I couldn’t find the courage to... come to you.”

“You’ve not even thought about me,” he said in an accusing tone. “You were thinking only about your boy...”

“I didn’t want someone to be killed because of me,” Xiao Zhan argued softly, and his hand quietly lay on John’s foot. He didn’t do anything else, just touched to understand if he was allowed to touch John right now. “Chuckie and Dickie overdid it.”

“Maybe,” John took another small sip. “Is the guy still alive?

Xiao Zhan didn’t like that “still”. He answered cautiously:

“Yeah, he’s still at mine.”

“I know. You brought it to yours and even dared to come to me? I’ve always given you too much freedom, Xiao Zhan.”

“You’ve excluded him from the Brotherhood, where else should he have gone?” Xiao Zhan’s hand slid up John’s ankle and lay on his knee. “I feel... guilty before him, it still was me who seduced him, put him in danger... You were right, this story did teach me something.”

“Really?” John’s brow arched though he wasn’t against a hand on his knee. “What did you learn from this story, my boy?”

“That I shouldn’t forget who’s my owner,” the guy answered softly, dropping his sight, and his hand slid along John’s thigh from the inside to his crotch.

“Mm,” he dragged ambiguously. “What else?”

“That neither adrenaline is worth your mercy,” Zhan sighed out, slightly closing his lids, as if all that really aroused him. At least, his body never let him down in this regard. “And else...”

“What else?” Zhan understood by John’s voice that he managed to catch him. The man was getting aroused, his sight went heavier.

“...that neither little asian cock can satisfy me, only yours,” Xiao Zhan opened his eyes and smiled innocently-bitchy, touching his knee with a cheek.

It hurt him to say that, moreover he thought he betrayed Yibo, but he knew that was exactly what John wanted to hear. And the man laughed pleased:

“Who can doubt,” then he finished the remnants of brandy, putting the glass on the table.

John wasn’t obviously going to forgive him just like that. He might have wanted Zhan to confess to him, to rip his soul out, to give it to him along with his body. Well, Xiao Zhan was ready for that.

“What did you lack, my boy?” he asked. “Why did you decide on a betrayal?”

“Forgive me, John,” Xiao Zhan whispered quietly, “I shouldn’t have done it,” he sighed out. “You were right: those journeys beyond the perimeter corrupted me. I became needy, I wanted something more, something... for myself, you know? I got bored here and... when I met Yibo there I immediately succumbed to my temptation. I swear, it’d been for the first time in my life. Before in my life it’d been only you.”

“Have you fallen in love with him?” John asked with jealousy.

“No,” Zhan dragged on, hiding his eyes and rubbing his cheek against the knee, moving closer to John. Tips of his fingers scraped John’s fly as if casually and played with it, “but I was curious what it would be like, I wouldn’t lie, I was pleased because I broke rules, that it was something forbidden and I could afford that...”

“Yes, you’ve always liked to break the rules,” the man said hollowly, and the guy moved even more closer:

“You and I have.”

John smirked and put a big warm hand on his cheek that was already on his thigh:

“Yes, you and I have. You were my best boy, I enjoyed my time with you. But those days are gone.”

Xiao Zhan opened his eyes widely and peered at John: he what... Did he say goodbye to him?

Genuine fear filled him up to the brim, and the guy clung to John’s hand in desperate attempt to prevent the inevitable end:

“No, John, they aren’t, nothing is gone! I am you Nightingale until the end, you know it! You’ve said it yourself!”

The man sighed out tiredly as though his shoulders carried the weight of the world:

“You hurt me, Zhan. You offended me in front of Victor, even Chuckie and Dickie saw that. There are things that are not to be forgiven.”

“No, John!” Xiao Zhan pressed himself against him, with his cheek to his stomach, embracing him with his arms, and cried out of fear, out of realization of his helplessness. “You can’t rob me of the choir, and my family of the status of the Confidant, you can beat me and punish me but don't rob me of your blessing! No, no, not this!”

And, behind his tears Zhan understood that words only flattered John’s ego. That in the life of his Nightingale he, John, his favor and love, stood on top of everything. By the way, as for every inhabitant of the community.

“Then you should have stopped back then,” the leader told him, “you had fun beyond the perimeter and then – enough. I thought the punishment taught you better. But you brought your lover here, to us, to our community...”

“No, I haven’t!” Xiao Zhan lifted his teary eyes at him. “I broke up with him, I swear, but he came to me himself! He told me he couldn’t forget me. I rejected him for a long time, I even told him about you and me, I told him I’m yours but they made him a Brother too soon, there was no way back for him. And then, when you rejected me, John, then I really went desperate and...”

“There, there, you’ve smeared your pencil all over...” the man affectionately stroked under his eyes, removing the running cosmetics. “It means I was right, and you threw yourself into his arms just because I closed mine to you?”

“I was so desperate, John!”

“I trust you, baby...” he slightly leaned to Zhan, and he interpreted that as a sign: leaned towards his lips and pressed against them with his own, carefully climbing to man’s lap. Xiao Zhan was tall, even slightly taller than John, the man accepted such weight on his old knees not without difficulty. That was not one of those teenage boys…

“Ah, Nightingales my Nightingales...” he grabbed Xiao Zhan more carefully, swinging him a little on his lap. “My happiness and my curse... what should I do with you?”

“Don’t push me away,” Xiao Zhan mumbled into his neck. “I’ve been living for your blessing since I was twelve, you know that, even earlier...”

“How old are you now, dear, remind me?”

“Twenty-six, John.”

“Twenty-six... Fourteen years together... That’s really a term.”

“I want to be with you for the rest of my life,” Xiao Zhan told him, “And this Wang Yibo... just make him leave. Let him get back on his legs, recover and then just send him beyond the perimeter. That was just one big mistake...”

Xiao Zhan felt as John’s arms were embracing him, stroking, he tried to fully relax in his embrace so that John would think he felt good:

“How can I send him away?” John asked. “The boy’s gone too far, he’s seen too much. No, I can’t let him beyond the perimeter now.”

“What’s then?” Xiao Zhan asked carefully. “Will you make him a laborer forever?”

“I don’t want to even know that he’s going somewhere around the community, near you,” John pressed Zhan against himself tighter and kissed his neck, then behind his ear.

Xiao Zhan got tense all over. He leaned back to look John in the eyes:

“What do you mean? Do you... do you want to kill him?”

John peered into Xiao Zhan’s eyes, filled with fear and pain, and more with an unlimited love, but not to him.

“You, a lying little bitch!” and the next second the man threw Xiao Zhan down from his lap.

Sung Joo was sitting in his room and thinking whether he should go visit Xiao Zhan. He worried about Wang Yibo and thought he could help his friend.

Seung Yeon was sitting at his working desk at the medical post, he couldn’t really work though. The signal for the curfew had been long ago, it got dark and he looked at his own reflection in the glass of the window.

In the white house, but in the opposite wing from John and Xiao Zhan, Zhou Yixuan was standing near the window of his bedroom. He understood his fate had led him to the parting of ways, to the biggest choice he had to make in his life. He had to decide whether to turn a blind eye to his father’s deeds or to live according to his own books about truth, sincerity and conscience. Why didn’t the man who wrote such smart and wonderful works correspond to his own doctrine? He had to decide whether to come into his heir’s rights, keep cooperation with the cartel or personally let it all die, robbing the people in the community of their homes and habitual way of life? He had to decide whether to become a beast or to stay human. To be or not to be.

Wang Yibo calmly slept in Xiao Zhan’s bedroom while his body was slowly but surely healing. Seung Yeon was right: just a fracture in his rib and a concussion, he had no more other severe injuries. Lucky Yibo. But he, of course, needed time to recover. Time Xiao Zhan was fighting for right now.

Xiao Zhan was lying, his face buried into a bed, sprawled out on it. His buttocks were lifted up high and John was sweepingly fucking him into the bed. They both got tired, sweaty. Xiao Zhan’s whole back was covered with glistening sweat and John stroked it from time to time and then smacked his ass loudly:

“Look at you, Xiao Zhan... you’re so tight, your cheeks are like stone and your balls got stiff... I’m sure you are hard now,” he found his cock with a hand and stroked his painful boner. “That’s it... you lying little bitch. You can lie to yourself as long as you want but you can never lie to me here. You like everything I do with you, fucking whore.”

Xiao Zhan didn’t react at all. He let rape himself, didn’t even moan, didn’t breath heavily, just lied, burhying himself into a mattress like a weak doll.

“Fourteen years together, m-yeah...” John proceeded. His cock, that had popped up not without difficulty, couldn’t finish yet so the act of punishment went somehow longer, “The time flew too fast. You’re so mature, Zhan, an average guy, but it’s still difficult for me to let you go. Because you’re mine, my boy forever.”

It was obedient, almost indifferent silence in response. John frowned: he had no joy in fucking a slack body.

“You can keep silent as long as you want, dear, but your body speaks for you,” he didn’t lose the tempo of his pushes, amazed by his own stamina, “you will cum soon, I feel your ass is tightening. You’ll cum under me as you’ve always come – that’s the only true way of things. That’s what it has to be like.”

No words concerned Zhan, didn’t wake him from the semi-dead numbness. John got angry, leaned to him and grabbed him by hair, lifting his head from the bed. He was all covered with tears. Horror froze in his glassy eyes together with obedience, with readiness to do anything only if…

“Come on, say at least something,” John shaked his head.

“I beg you...” Zhan whispered, obediently accepting sweeping pushes into his ass, “...don’t kill Wang Yibo... just don’t kill him...”

“Again your Wang Yibo,” John pocked Zhan’s face into the mattress again, annoyed. “I’m sick of him! I’m most disgusted because you fell in love with him, Zhan. With him! When I’m near. You’re such a fool...”

“You broke my heart!” Zhan shouted and cried, not quietly now but loudly, with sobbing. “You’ve never belonged to me! And Wang Yibo is mine! Leave him to me, John, please, let him live! He’s not guilty of anything!”

“Oh, my boy...” John stroked his asscheeks, touching the rim with his fingers, where his dick was pushing time after time. “You’re right... Who's that Wang Yibo next to me? It’s even funny I saw him as my competitor... It's ridiculous. A few months of you knowing each other can’t cover our fourteen years together, they never will. You’ll always be only my boy, only mine...”

“John, please, promise to me...” Zhan wheezed, “...I’ll trust only your promise... promise to me Wang Yibo will live...”

“Come here,” he dragged Zhan to himself, leaving his body. He put the guy on his knees, Zhan bent his lower back, and John dragged his back to his chest, holding the guy by his neck under the adam’s apple:

“Cum,” he whispered to him in the ear, “cum untouched, right now, and I promise to you I wouldn’t even lay a hand on him... Come on, my boy...”

Xiao Zhan shut his eyes, concentrating fully on his senses, his maroon cock trembled, he had so little air, and John whispered to him:

“Come on, show me who you really are – a cumming whore... You’re not an innocent boy anymore, you’re a whore with a fucking hole, come on, my dear...”

And he came. With tight white spurts. It was a lot, and then John came after him, freeing him, finally, from his arms, leaving his body and letting him lie on the bed, weak and powerless.

“Woah!” the man sighed out, shaking his head. It was a good fuck still. He didn’t even expect it from himself that he could still do it.

“You... promised, John,” Xiao Zhan mumbled, “promised...”

“What?” he went to pour himself a drink. “Ah, about your boy... well, I won’t even lay a hand on him, I told you.”

The man was so pleased with himself, sipped brandy. Xiao Zhan weakly lifted himself on the bed: all his body was like cotton, his arms and legs trembled out of weakness.

“And Chuckie and Dickie... you won’t send them,” he said. “Promise me, John.”
He squinted.

“Alright, I won’t,” he mumbled. “Let you boy recover and go back to laborers. I don’t want you both to communicate after that.”

“Thank you, John,” Xiao Zhan got up with difficulty, picking his scattered clothes up from the floor. “The moment Yibo can walk, he’ll go to laborers. I promise to you... We’ll forget about it like a bad memory...”

“But I won’t give you back the position of the head of the choir, Zhan,” he cut off. “You’ll carry your punishment till the end. Go to Brother Cho and choose yourself a new position within the community. You’ll never go beyond the perimeter again.”

“Thank you, John! Of course, that’s what I’ll do,” the guy dressed hastily.

“If I want to see you I’ll call for you. Stop running to me every time, otherwise I’ll get sick of it quickly. I’m already sick...”

“Yes, John, forgive me, of course... I’ll come to you only if you want...”

“Then we’re good,” John smacked his ass. “I like obedient boys. Get back to yourself. I’ll think more about the status of your family.”

Earlier if Xiao Zhan had stayed longer at John he’d just let him stay overnight at his home but this time he sent him away, Zhan wouldn’t have stayed himself though. Even with a risk to encounter the hounds, Xiao Zhan still went back to his place. He urgently had to wash himself, if he could wash himself from something like that though.

Everyone had already slept at home when he came back. Filling the tub, Xiao Zhan was blankly staring at it. He wanted to lie on the bottom of it and let the water fill his lungs, to doze off in her warm embrace, to turn off and not to think about anything, not to worry about anything.

He couldn't’ afford such a luxury though: in his bedroom there was Wang Yibo lying, who he had to take care of. Wang Yibo, who he had come to John for. Wang Yibo, who he was ready to bear everything from John for, anything, only if Yibo was alive.

Zhan believed Yibo would heal. After all, they had some time now, to get him back on his feet and, maybe, he would be lucky and they would manage to plan how to get out of here.

But, lying in his tub, Zhan still felt he’d done not enough. It wasn’t enough to negotiate a couple of weeks from John for Yibo’s healing. If they sent Wang Yibo to the laborer's house after that it wouldn’t make sense. John wouldn’t let him see each other, Xiao Zhan was almost sure of it, he would watch Xiao Zhan and his exemplary behavior. He had to do something else, but what? What?

When the guy entered the room, trying not to make a noise, Wang Yibo still twitched and moaned:

“Zhan?..”

“Yeah, it’s me, love, it’s me...” he immediately sat at the head of the bed, lightly stroking Yibo’s forehead. “You’re sweaty, and your forehead is warm... are you hot? Shall I open the window?”

“Drink...”

“Yeah, I’ll be right back...” he poured some water for Yibo, put a straw to his lips, lifting his head.

“You... left?” Yibo asked when he’d drunk enough.

“Just went to the bathroom,” Zhan lied, opening the window. “Yibo, tell me...” he came back, sat again at the head of the bed, “dear, guide me, what should I do? What can I do to destroy John once and for all? To raze this cursed hole to the ground?”

“Evidences,” Yibo sighed out, and Zhan understood him right away. Of course, they’d talked about it a thousand times.

“Now I understand that just two of us wouldn’t handle it,” Zhan told him. “We have to ask for help. Tell me, Yibo, who do you trust? Because I trust now no one except you.”

Wang Yibo found his hand and squeezed fingers, slowly saying:

“Yixuan, Sung Joo... Seung Yeon.”

Xiao Zhan twitched indignantly but Yibo suddenly squeezed Xiao Zhan, surprisingly tightly for his condition, keeping him at place and then repeated stubbornly:

“Seung Yeon.”

Xiao Zhan looked Wang Yibo in the face and responded firmly:

“Okay, I got it.”

Chapter Text

Xiao Zhan slept through Tuesday on the floor near Wang Yibo. He hadn’t slept for almost two days, after all. The man surprisingly woke up accurately five minutes to the signal for wake and lunch, took away his mother’s food from the kitchen without a word from, had a meal himself, fed Yibo, gave him medicine and smeared him with the ointment and then they fell asleep again.

In the middle of the day Wang Yibo asked to go to the toilet again but when Xiao Zhan picked the bowl from the floor he frowned and pushed his hand away:
“Help me get up...”

“No, Yibo, it’s still too soon for you to get up...”

The guy breathed like a little bull, turned to the side, gritting his teeth.
“Lord, you’re so obstinate...” Zhan clicked with his tongue, helping his beloved to sit in the bed, holding him under his back, “Aren’t you dizzy?”
Yibo swung his feet off the bed, sat a little, mumbled:
“Go...”

Zhan helped him to get up, Yibo clung to him and with an uneven walk they carefully headed from the room down by the stairs to the toilet. Mrs. Xiao was in the kitchen. She followed them with a tense glare but didn’t say anything. Xiao Zhan stayed inside with Yibo, helping him with clothes, then he helped him to go upstairs in the same way.
When he went downstairs to his mother for dinner she asked him an careful hope:

“The boy’s already walking, does that mean he’s good now? Maybe he will go away in two days?”

Xiao Zhan looked at the woman, gritting his teeth. This moment he wanted to punch her so wildly, give her a slap so she could finally wake up a little, but he just silently took the dinner upstairs.

Wang Yibo wasn’t only drinking broth now, he tried to eat, having chewed the soup contents. Xiao Zhan was really proud of him. When they went to sleep again, Yibo asked:
“Lie with me...”

“I’m already lying with you,” Zhan smiled but the guy said:
“On the bed.”

The guy wanted to argue that they’d better not do that, that he could accidentally hurt Yibo with a shoulder or an elbow, that it would be painful but he couldn’t say no to Wang Yibo. Zhan carefully stretched his body along near his beloved, trying not to touch him and not to press against him too much, he intertwined their fingers, carefully kissing the guy’s forehead.
“Sing,” another order.

“You’ve become so needy,” Xiao Zhan whispered to him, “you’re really recovering,” he thought a little, burying his nose into Yibo’s hair, “Do you want me to sing a chinese lullaby for you? My mother sang it to me when I was a kid.”

“I do.”

A few more gentle kisses on Yibo’s forehead and Zhan started singing quietly just like when he’d sung him Queen’s “Mother love”. They needed neither passion nor sex nor mutual confessions. Zhan just lay near, held Yibo’s hand and sang him a lullaby quietly – and there was no one on the globe who was closer and more precious to him than this person.

In the evening after lunch Sung Joo came. The guy felt really uneasy: he hovered on the terrace, sighing, and didn't know where to look. Confusion captured his whole soul. When Zhan went out to him they greeted each other a little awkwardly, poorly.
“Brother Zhan...”

“Su... Brother Sung Joo...”
Sung Joo looked at Zhan forcefully, and the man nodded to him:
“Let’s go to the backyard, we’ll talk there.”

Though at the backyard they still were in the open space, there was less chance someone would see them. The guys sat right on the threshold near the back door, Xiao Zhan decided to start talking first:
“Thank you for coming.”

“There’s no need...” he said resignedly right away.
“No, you’re not right,” Xiao Zhan gently shaked his head, “We’re now alone against the whole community. I’m really glad that you didn’t just go past us.”

Sung Joo looked frustratingly in front of himself. There was no sign of his usual talkativeness and bubbliness anymore.
“They say different things about you in the community... almost all of them already guessed. So have you eventually seduced him?”

Xiao Zhan involuntarily chuckled: Sung Joo still didn’t know the whole truth, he just knew that Xiao Zhan fell in love with Yibo.
“Yes, I have,” Zhan responded, because that was partially true.

“You’re really something,” his friend shaked his head and smiled wryly with just a corner of his lips, Fatale Zhan... What a loss for all Sisters...”
They fell silent for a little bit, then Sung Joo asked him:
“How did John know?”
“He caught us.”

“Oh, damn...” Sung Joo glanced at Zhan from his head to toe, “There’s no bruise on you... Did Yibo get them all?”
“Uh-huh.”

“Damn. Is he alive?”
“Yeah,” Zhan answered heavily, “Seung Yeon managed to examine him. He just has some fractures in his ribs and a concussion.”

“Oh... May I see him?”
“He’s sleeping,” Xiao Zhan said, “And, believe me, you wouldn’t like to see it...”

“Poor Brother Yibo... And what’s next?”
“No idea,” Xiao Zhan shrugged and then pressed his lips tightly so as not to let tears that were сhoking him turn down, “John promised me not to kill him but... I’m still so afraid of him all the time, Sung Joo, permanently, do you get it?”

Sung Joo hugged Xiao Zhan by his shoulders, patting him reassuringly, gathers his courage and asked:
“Can I... help you with anything?”

Xiao Zhan knew how John could help them, knew how Seung Yeon could help the, but he didn’t know what to ask for from the only person who bravely offered his help.
“No, probably, not yet, you can’t...” he answered sadly, “But thank you for the offer, really. Whenever we need something I’ll tell you, okay?”

“Sure,” they got up, awkwardly shaked hands. Sung Joo lowered his head and was about to leave when Xiao Zhan suddenly called him:
“Sung Joo, hold on, though... There’s something you can really do for us.”

On Wednesday Xiao Zhan went to work with laborers at the building site. Out of all the men only Ron came up to him and asked how Yibo was doing, he was really worried about his friend and handed him a souffle with words: “It helped Yibo last time.” Xiao Zhan didn’t really understand what he was talking about but he accepted the souffle and hid it in his pocket. No one risked approaching Xiao Zhan anymore, they just looked at him sideways and sometimes smiled strangely, especially Fred.

Xiao Zhan came to Yibo for lunch and dinner, brought him his portion from the canteen, and they shared a meal. Then he gave the guy medicine, helped him to go to the toilet and then left again, locking the door with a key.

When Zhan gave him Ron’s souffle he blossomed with am awkwards smile, the one he could do with a swollen face and a bruised lip. He unwrapped the sweet and broke it into two halves, handing the one to Zhan:
“Savior needs to be saved too.”

Thursday repeated just like Wednesday. Xiao Zhan worked with laborers at the building site, coming home at the time of lunches and dinners, in the evening he sat with Wang Yibo, having locked in the room.

The day of Friday went away in the same way, but in the evening after the curfew Xiao Zhan suddenly headed somewhere. Wang Yibo was already sleeping so the man tried to move as quietly as possible so as not to wake him up. He went outside and with small dashes headed to the side of the lookout tower.

Xiao Zhan was there first. Despite the fact the according to the timetable there had to be someone on the watch – the space was empty. It didn’t confuse him at all because he knew where was the one who had to stay in the tower.

Taking advantage of the fact that he came first Xiao Zhan took out four glasses from the cupboard, put the coffee to boil, on the second floor he slightly moved the table forward and placed stools and chairs around it. And started to wait. He was nervous. Really nervous. He understood that a lot of things for them depended on today’s evening. For Yibo.
Yixuan came first. He glanced over the inside decoration of the tower, looked at Xiao Zhan:
“Sung Joo told me you wanted to meet and talk,” it seemed Yixuan felt out of place. Actually, Zhan could easily understand him.

“That’s true, take a seat,” Xiao Zhan said peacefully, “Would you like some coffee?”
“Where’s he himself?” Yixuan rubbed his neck, obviously a little nervous.

“He’ll be here soon. We’re not starting without him.”
Sung Joo came in three minutes but not alone. Seung Yeon followed him. However, when the last one went up to the second floor and saw Xiao Zhan and Yixuan he looked at Sung Joo indignantly:
“What does it mean?! You told me there’s a man here...” he stumbled out of outrage and Xiao Zhan noticed that he was carrying a first aid case.

“Sorry, Seung Yeon,” Sung Joo smiled apologizing, however, blocking a way to the stairs, “You wouldn’t come otherwise.”
Seung Yeon looked angrily at Xiao Zhan and he poured him a coffee conciliatory:
“Please, take a seat, let’s talk.”

“I know what you’re going to talk about!” he minted, “I’ve already given you my answer!”
“Brother,” Sung Joo said quietly and touched Seun Yeong by the shoulder, “listen to him, okay? It’s time we listened to each other...”

Seung Yeon shaked his hand off his shoulder, pressed his lips stubbornly but put his case on the floor and sat on the free stool. Xiao Zhan glanced questioningly at Sung Joo but the man just shaked his head briefly as if no, I’m standing here so that no one would run away.
Then Xiao Zhan hummed, locked his fingers on the table and, having glanced shortly at Yixuan, started:
“John started to touch me when I was eight...” Seung Yeon twitched, glanced at Yixuan and lowered his head, Zhan went on, “It was almost innocently at the beginning. He did it as if by accident but then he started to afford himself more and more. In two years he jerked me off for the first time, then he taught me how to caress him and then he raped for the first time...”

“Why are you telling all that?!” Seung Yeon twitched again, afraid to look at Yixuan at all now, “That... Why?! And... in front of him!
“Because we’ve always been silent about it!” Xiao Zhan raised his voice, “Because all that has happened to us – because we’ve suppressed that! We were ashamed, afraid, told ourselves that it was alright, that nothing bad was happening! I lied to myself for fourteen years! And I would lie more if not for Yibo! So don’t you shut me up, I wanna talk about it! I want Yixuan to finally hear the whole truth!”

Yixuan looked at Zhan and froze. It seemed he couldn’t yet believe in what he’d just heard.
“He raped me when I was twelve and I was his permanent lover,” Xiao Zhan continued hurriedly as if he was worried they wouldn’t let him finish, “When I turned eighteen he went cold to me but that time I started to go to him myself so that... he wouldn’t take boys.”

Seung Yeon chuckled as though he knew exactly Xiao Zhan was lying.
“But I want to stop it,” the man went further, “to stop John forever. To bring him to clean water, put him on trial... I won’t do it without your help.”
“Well, that’s enough!” Seung was really angry now, “You have no right to say all that, shame on you...”

“Why should I be ashamed?” Zhan argued with him not without rage, “That’s my life, I’m not guilty of what John’s done with me!”
“Stop painting himself a victim!” Seung Yeon lashed out at him, “Yixuan, don’t listen to him! John’s not a rapist, he’s never been!”
And again to Zhan:
“Everything he’s done with you... but you...” Seung Yeon went really embarrassed, blushed and glanced bashfully at Yixuan, said through gritted teeth, “I know you didn’t at all suffer, Xiao Zhan.”

“Call things what they are,” Xiao Zhan answered coldly, “I came with him. Were you talking about it? Don’t I have the right to call myself a victim just because John made me come with him?”
Seung Yeon gritted his teeth not being able to repeat something like that after him, then he spelled:
“John has never forced neither you nor me to do anything. You and I and every Nightingale, we all did that voluntarily because... because of different reasons.”
“...and every Nightingale?” Yixuan asked weakly.

“Yes,” Xiao Zhan turned to him, “There’s no former or current member of the choir who’s never been in this hands...”
“But he’s never taken them by force!” Seung Yeon cried hysterically, as if this only fact made a difference, “He will never hurt any Nightingale!”
“And here you’re mistaken,” Sung Joo made a sound from his place and everyone looked at him, “You’ve always been agreeable, Seung Yeon. If course he never hurt you. But you don’t know what he’s like when he’s angry. But I do.”

Sung Joo stood at the stair, crossing his hand on his chest. He surveyed the guys, sighed:
“Well, if we’re having an evening of confessions here...” and he started to tell his story, “John didn’t touch me for long. Dunno, I was always too bad-behaved: loud, noisy, restless... John liked quiet ones like Xiao Zhan and Seung Yeon but he always avoided me. However... he might have wanted to try something with me... In general, he started putting hands on me too. On every blessing – the same thing. He might have liked feeling my ass – he never put his hands off it. I was disgusted but I endured, I thought it was my punishment for a bad behavior... You know, John permanently came up with what to punish us for. But then, anyway... he took a decisive action when I was thirteen. He put me on my knees in front of him, undid my trousers and told me I had to accept his blessing into myself...” Yixuan quietly his his face with hands, Xiao Zhan and Seung Yeon look at Sung Joo dejectedly, “ well and... in short... he started to push his dick into my mouth...” Sung Joo blushed all over, he looked down on the floor in front of himself. They all saw that each was word was hard for him but he kept squeezing it from himself in syllables, probably, feeling too that he had to speak, “First I got afraid, shocked, froze all over... but then I got so angry! I was so angry! And I thought... I thought: what the hell?! And I... well, okay... I bit his cock.”

Seung Yeon gasped, Xiao Zhan opened his mouth and Yixuan even lifted his face from his hands.
“I bit his skin till the blood,” Sung Joo continued and then started to smile as if that was one of the best memories from his childhood, “He cried so loudly... I still remember the taste of his blood. He slapped me so hard! It even started ringing in my head. And well then everyone ran there, the doctor was called... Everyone even forgot about me though I knew I was going to get something after that. I came home and found my father's cognac. He had a nest egg, they allowed him to go beyond the perimeter at that times... I’d never given a fuck until that moment but on that day I decided that I was already an adult and... well, in general, I got drunk.”

He chuckled and looked at the guys. They stared at him in astonishment, Sung Joo grinned with a corners of his lips:
“Well, and you know what was next.”

For some time guy remained confusedly silent and then it dawned on Xiao Zhan:
“Was that day you sneaked into a radio room?!”

“Uh-huh,” Sung Joo confirmed, laughing now, “I was so wasted, even threw up a couple of times but I don’t really remember how I’d got there. I just remember myself standing there, the light bulb is on, I am on the air, I’m holding a mic and well... Do you remember what I said then?”

“I remember I heard something but my mother dashed to me and covered my ears,” Yixuan said.
“And I remember you were saying something nasty but don’t remember what exactly,” Xiao Zhan answered.

“You were saying something about John,” Seung Yeon said, “I remember it was something nasty...”
“That’s true,” Sung Joo nodded, “I’d heard the only swears from my father in my life. And that was only when he got wasted with whiskey from his nest egg. “Fucking fags” – he always said it, his favorite swear. Fucking fags,” Sung Joo smiled but his smile was so bitter, not typical of him, “I sneaked into the radio room and then said to the whole community: “John is a fucking faggot and I bit his dick.” And then I laughed like a fool because...” he inhaled shudderingly, “...because I wanted to cry so much.”

A heavy pause fell on them, the men were in shock. And then Sung Joo reached for his belt and started to undo it, looking at his friends with a simple open sight.
“What are you doing?” Seung Yeon didn’t restrain.
“Because we’re turning our souls inside out here I’m showing you something,” he said, clinging to his trousers together with his underwear, “Especially to you, Seung Yeon, that’s right to the topic that John will never hurt any Nightingale...”

The guy turned his back to them and abruptly pulled off his trousers together with his underwear to the knees. All three guys gasped in sync: from his waist down, until the very popliteal fossa, buttocks and thighs of Sung Joo were covered with thin white scars. He had been flogged, and moreover, so long and really harshly. Till his blood, and flesh.
“John did it himself,” Sung Joo said and pulled his trousers and underwear up, turning his face to them, “As a warning for me, so that I would always remember... And my father held me by my hands because he was afraid John would do something worse to our family otherwise. I lost consciousness out of pain and then lied at the medical post for a month. But he never touched me again. Never.”

They guys were silent, each of them stared into nothing. But Sung Joo finished, talking to Seung Yeon:
“So you’re not right, John is a really tough man. Really.”

“You’ve seen yourself how Yibo was beaten,” Xiao Zhan quietly said to Seung Yeon, “you’ve seen the children who came to you with their rims ripped for years... Did you really never... never doubted him?”
Seung Yeon shaked, he jumped and dashed to the exit but Sung Joo blocked his way, then he turned to Xiao zhan and spit out to him:
“No! I didn’t! And I’m not going to do it! It’s disgusting what you all are doing here! You’re digging on John, sow confusion, disbelief... What do you want, Xiao Zhan?! To betray John?! I’ll never betray him, I’m not you!”

“Fucking wake up, finally, you fool!” Zhan cried while jumping from his place, “Stop competing with me! You’ve always wanted to show John that you’re better than me! But he doesn’t care! Doesn’t! He’s been using you all your life, and me too, we’re not different! You’re the victim just like me, like Sung Joo, like all of us, but I have courage to admit it and you live in the illusion of your never existing love! There’s no love!” Xiao Zhan choked on air, clenched his fists and his eyes were burning angrily and dark, “Do you know what love is? That’s when you are ready for anything for a person, when his happiness is more important than your own, when your fear goes aways, your doubts go away, there is only you and him...”

“I know!” Seung Yeon shouted at his face, “I know! Do you think you are the only one here who can feel?! Or maybe that’s you who’s delusional about love, aha, Xiao Zhan? Are you sure that what you feel to Yibo is real and not just a psychological transference?”
Xiao Zhan leaned to him over the table and said through gritted teeth:
“Are you jealous now about John... or Yibo?”

And Seung Yeon threw himself at him, right across the table, no one even managed to do anything. The guys fell on the floor, clung to each other, Yixuan and Sung Joo cried even, not knowing from where to reach them, table and chairs hurdled them. And guys rolled down from each other a couple of times and then Seung Yeon was above. He sat on Xiao Zhan and choked his throat out of anger, but Yixuan threw himself at him and dragged him away, Sung Joo helped him and Xiao Zhan coughed right away, sitting on the floor, but then still said huskily:

“He’s never loved you, face it... He’s never loved me, no one, he just can’t love... I’ve tried to find that love in him... love from his books, but there’s none of it, Seung Yeon, none... He just uses all of us, you... He does all the dirty work with your hands. To heal the boys, to get rid of Jessica-Ann’s body... I’m sure he’ll ask you to do something with Yibo. He promised me he wouldn’t lay a finger on him but he shouldn’t, should he? Why get his hands dirty when he has a faithful and loyal Cho Seung Yeon who’s ready to do anything for him? I don’t trust John and I’m sure he’ll ask you to kill Wang Yibo.”

Seung Yeon shaked Yixuan’s hands off from himself, dusted himself off angrily and hissed to Xiao Zhan before leaving:
“He’ll never order me that, got it?! Never!”
Sung Joo wanted to hold him but Seung Yeon looked at him with such a sight that the man stepped from his way involuntarily. The doctor flew out of the lookout tower into the night, swiftly moving to the Family block.

“Damn, he forgot his case here,” Sung Joo remembered, picking it up, “Seung Yeon, hold on!” and ran to catch up to him.
Xiao Zhan and Yixuan were left alone. As if some delusion dissipated: Xiao Zhan suddenly felt sorry for everything Yixuan had seen and heard here today. Maybe he had really invited him here in vain...
“Zhan...” Yixuan said quietly, “I... vaguely guessed before but... I could never imagine that...”
“It’s not necessary, Yixuan.”

“No, I... I don’t know... that... I’m so ashamed for what my father did, and it hurts though I know that I’m not guilty of anything but...”
“Why be sorry when you just can help?” Xiao Zhan asked quietly.
The man sighed heavily and nodded, putting hands in his pockets:
“What help do you want from me?”

“Evidences,” Xiao Zhan simply said, “We need compromising material on John. I know there's some records – in his working computer or, maybe, on some spare DVD’s. He recorded me. Maybe, someone else too, but I know exactly about myself. We need to get compromising material on John and take Wang Yibo out of here. I can stay here, I don’t care what awaits me... The main thing is to save Yibo and that nothing of is was in vain.”

Yixuan looked bitterly at Zhan then chuckled and eventually cried. He tried his best not to but he couldn’t. His eyes went moist and he asked the guy:
“Do you want me to betray my father?”
But he told him simply and firmly:
“I do.”

Chapter Text

Saturday morning. The Xiao Family was in the Assembly Hall. But they were sitting not in the second row this time, as they’d been sitting for the last fourteen years, but in the seventh. It was the last row for the Familial, average Brothers were sitting behind their backs. The most exemplary fall from the social ladder you could only imagine. You just take place on another bench and everyone understands now who you are and how to treat you.

Xiao Zhan tried to accept that calmly. His father held up, gritted teeth but tried not to meet anyone’s eyes. His mother was ready to burst into tears at any moment.
John’s morning lecture was devoted to snakes that people sometimes nourish in their bosom. And though he didn’t mention any concrete name, everyone understood who that was about.

At the end their leader announced that a colloquium for laborers was held the following week and they had to prepare. No word about Yibo, again, as if there was none of him in the community anymore. That made Xiao Zhan worried but he didn’t dare approach John with that question again. After all, Yibo was still too weak, Xiao Zhan wouldn’t let him go, at least to the house of laborers yet.

After the meeting all of them went to labor to the Female block, to go on building the house.
Xiao Zhan wanted to talk to Yixuan and Seung Yeon but they avoided him. He was nervous: was that out of conspiracy, so as not to show others they were whispering about something with disgraced Zhan or had he been really too much the day before? Maybe he shouldn’t have acted so straightforwardly, stubbornly but patiently, subtly?

Damn, Wang Yibo would’ve done it all better, he would've... he was such a diplomat when needed... he would sit, would play checkers – and they would’ve been on the right path. Xiao Zhan wasn’t capable of that, he just couldn’t, he could only hope that he hadn’t made it worse for Yibo with his secret meeting yesterday.
Ron came up to him again, asked gently:
“Who’s Brother Yibo feeling today?”

Xiao Zhan smiled warmly to him:
“Ron, he’s not a Brother anymore... but he’s fine, thank you.”

Suddenly Victor called Ron:
“Ronald! Come here!”

The man twitched, looked around at his mentor, nodded to Zhan goodbye and headed to Victor. The man looked displeased, and told him, frowning:
“You converse too much with Brother Xiao...”
“But... is it bad?” the laborer asked confusedly.

“Brother Xiao is hiding Wang Yibo, he’s keeping him at his place. And Wang Yibo is not a good man.”
“Bro.. Is Wang Yibo a bad person?” Ron dragged on, surprised, “What has he done, mentor? Why was he removed from the Brotherhood? No one tells me...”

“No one is going to say such things out loud,” Victor told him, “But I don’t want you to ask about the health and businesses of this man anymore. Forget about him, Ron, he’s no longer your friend. Don’t even talk to him, even via Brother Zhan.”
Ron stood, confused and wilted. It was obviously difficult for him to accept Victor’s words and his orders. The latter patted his shoulder:
“Go work. Just trust me.”

The guy shambled out. And Victor went right into the crows of workers and found Fred, catching him by the sleeve:
“Let’s go talk for a moment. We need to talk.”

Fred peered into him, put his tools aside, wiping his hand against the working trousers, and the men headed to the side of the building site where women had already started to prepare everything for the barbeque.
Victor squinted at the sun but his sight remained tenacious, shrewd. He didn’t start talking right away, looked appraisingly at Fred and then asked:
“Another attempt to get into the Brotherhood, uh, Fred?”

It sounded almost mockingly but the men curved his lips in a scornful smile:
“The Council of the Confidants is waiting for me to give up?”

Victor chuckled, put his hands behind his back, said:
“I, personally, like your stubbornness. I always vote for you.”

“Really?” the man responded coldly.
Victor understood that Fred wasn’t going to buy either his flattering or fake friendliness. It might have been better to go straight to details and that’s what he did:
“Finally, you have a real chance to transfer this time. And a real chance to prove your loyalty.”

Fred’s face changed. He straightened his back, looked at Victor from head to toe and said through gritted teeth:
“I’m all ears...”

Seung Yeon knocked on John’s study door and heard the usual:
“Come in, Seung Yeon.”

He smiled when he saw his leader. He’s already changed into his domestic clothes, was drinking his brandy and reading a newspaper when the guy came in.
“Hello, John,” the doctor greeted him. He held a file with a weekly report in his hands, “I’m surprised you’ve called for me today and not on Monday as usual...”
John smiled to him and folded the newspaper, took thin glasses off his nose:
“I just wanted your company. I’d be a proud old man.”

“You’re not an old man,” Seung Yeon argued gently, sitting himself at the table and opening his file, “Do you want a report of patients or of accountancy?”
“For boys. I want to know how my Nightingales are doing.”
“They’re alright,” the doctor smiled and for the next ten minutes he told him about every child-boy in the community. John was listening to him, not interrupting, nodded. Finally, when Seung Yeon finished, he somehow made a conclusion:
“Well, Seung Yeon, good job. Actually, as usual.”

The guy smiled, with honor.
“Thank you, John.”
“I’m really glad I have you,” the man looked at the guy gently and gratefully, “You’re the only one here I can rely on.”
“John!” Seung Yeon was moved and he took his hand. John’s hands were always big and warm. Seung Yeon adored touching them. This time again he didn’t restrain from kneading his hand, “Are you really upset about Xiao Zhan now?”

The man chuckled sadly:
“What do you think?”
“Let’s not talk about him!” the guy offered hurriedly.
“Let’s not,” the man agreed readily, “What are your plans for tonight?”

“No plans,” Seung Yeon smiled, “Just you, John.”
Seung Yeon was still holding the man’s hand and the latter caught his wrist:
“I like hearing something like that,” and then he dragged the guy to himself.
The doctor succumbed and stood from the table, got closer to John, leaned to him and they kissed, but the man dragged the guy further – he sat on his knees and blushed shyly:
“John, stop it, I’m heavy...”

“Not at all,” the leader said and kissed Seung Yeon’s lips again. The guy melted, he embraced man’s neck, burying his nose into the man’s beard, he half-closed his eyes and breathed him in, gently touching the edge of his beard with his lips, behind the ear. John greedily squeezed his lover in his embrace, running his hand along the guy's thigh. He had to know Seung Yeon was already aroused. His boy’d always been so obedient...

“Oh, kitty, you missed me?” the man asked, smiling at his tiny kisses.
“Of course,” Seung Yeon rubbed against him with a cheek and placed his face in the crook of his leader’s neck.
“For how long haven’t we had it?”

“Three months and eleven days,” he answered without hesitation.
“Oh, I’m so sorry, my kitty!” John’s hand scorchingly stroked Seung Yeon’s hip once again, “I’ve been so much into the work...”
“I know that,” he said obediently into his ear, “You have so much on your shoulders: the community, books, and a lot of jobs and some troubles... and you still have other people. I see.”

“You’re the most humble one I have,” John’s hand ran up but this time on the inner part of Seung Yeon thigh, “the most obedient,” fingers gently touched his aroused cock, “the most patient boy, Seung Yeon.”
John stroked his crotch gently, felt his member under the trousers, making a suppressed sweet moan leave his lips.
“You’re my boy, Seung Yeon,” John said favorably, undoing his zip, “You deserve being blessed more often... You deserve to be my favorite Nightingale.”

Seung Yeon scorchingly breathed into his neck when John dived behind his trousers with a hand and took out a cock through the slit, squeezing it in his fist.
“I’d like you to come more often to me, kitty,” John started to jerk him off and the guy clung to men's shoulders, all tense from the arousal, “Maybe even with overnight stays... Only Xiao Zhan stayed overnight at mine but he betrayed my trust and you have won it. You won it longer ago, kitty. Will you do anything for me?”

“Y-yeah... yes, John, of course... oh, oh, John...”
“My head’s been in the wrong place for the last week,” he said quietly but still working with his hand, “I’ve barely recovered from Xiao Zhan’s betrayal. You won’t do that to me, will you? Will you not break my heart?”

“John, I love you, you know that... I’ll never betray you...”
“Of course, kitty, I wasn’t awaiting another response... so gentle boy... You always give me warmth, baby, and I’ve missed it for the last week... I’m always thinking about that incident... I’m always thinking about Wang Yibo though I don’t want to think about him...”

“Oh, John, please, don’t stop... just... don’t stop!”
“This Wang Yibo, darling... like a fly buzzing around, that prevents me from sleeping. I’m sick, you know, just because he’s here, in the community...”
“So, send him away...” Seung Yeon was covered with sweat because of tension, he breathed heavily, his cock was bright red in his leader’s hands, “Let him go.”
“I can’t, kitty, he’s gone too far, get it? I can’t let him go beyond the perimeter, he’s seen and learnt too much. Here, sweetheart, you good?”

“Yes-yes, John, yeah..”
“But you can help me with my problem, darling,” John said flatteringly, “Only you can help me, after all, I trust only you...”

“Yes, John...”
“We need to get rid of Wang Yibo, baby.”

Though the man didn’t stop caressing, the guy froze, his cock even softened a little. Seung Yeon lifted his head, slightly leaned back to look his leader in the eyes:
“What?”
“Will you help me get rid of Wang Yibo, baby, m?”
This moment Cho Seung Yeon felt as if everything dropped inside him.

Sunday. Seung Yeon, not having slept all night, was standing in front of the house of Xiao family and looking at the windows of the second floor. He felt so disgusted and sick that morning as he’d never been ever before. He’d even managed to properly burst into tears. Maybe two or three times. The last thing he wanted was to stay in front of the family Xiao’s house, the last thing he wanted was to see Xiao Zhan and look him in the eyes but the guy understood that he had to do it.

Well. A step. He came up to the front porch, three steps and here he was – facing the front door. A step. He swung an arm and knocked on the door, he waited for the reasonable time. The door opened and the guy saw mrs. Xiao, he smiled at him politely:
“Seung Yeon? What brought you here?” Have you come here to Xiao Zhan? Or to check that boy?”

“Can you please call Xiao Zhan?” he smiled politely.
“Of course, he’s upstairs. I’ll call him now.”

Wang Yibo’s head had recovered in the first four days. Permanent headache eased, the ringing in his ears stopped and the world was back to its usual state and didn’t triple vision anymore, always floating somewhere, then it became easier for him to bear the circumstances.

Wang Yibo was frustrated by his physical weakness more than anything. That he turned out to be a burden for Xiao Zhan. He wasn’t afraid for his own future in the community. Hope for a good outcome and that they would make it – it disappeared the moment John and his squad broke into the rehearsal house but then came back again a little. He had to believe in good, he really had to. Because if he gave up he would break Xiao Zhan completely.

It was painful for him to move, everything hurt: to lift his arms, to lean, to breathe, even to go to the toilet. He didn’t know how just one fracture in ribs could spoil life so much. He couldn’t look at his blue-purple face at all, so he turned away from the mirror in the bathroom. Thank god, his teeth were alright, though the one on the left felt loose...
But the guy started step by step to get up from the bed at the end of the week, started to go to the toilet by himself, started to eat more or less solid food, and pills still helped him so he had a chance. He had to believe.

On Saturday evening Xiao Zhan told him that he’d gathered guys in the lookout tower the day before and how it had ended up. Yibo didn’t criticize his methods out loud, just said reassuringly that people always need some time, that betrayal of anybody was always a step you had to collect your courage for. And that Zhan hadn’t pressure them anymore.
Having lain in bed most of the week, Wang Yibo wildly wanted to recover fully and start to go out somewhere, but in reality he wasn’t allowed to anywhere in the community. As he understood, his status hadn’t been defined yet, Xiao Zhan didn’t say that out loud but Yibo saw that he was afraid for his life. It meant, the danger wasn’t yet gone. Or, it mightn’t have gone completely. Xiao Zhan listened to the steps outside, twitched when someone rang the doorbell and always locked Yibo with a key, always pulling the handle to check if the door was locked well.

On that Sunday morning they had barely managed to have breakfast when someone knocked on the door, Xiao Zhan twitched and alerted but then he heard mrs. Xiao’s voice behind the door:
“Son, Brother Seung Yeon wants to see you.”

Xiao Zhan perked up:
“Maybe he wants to help us?! Maybe he’s finally ripened?”

Wang Yibo tried to sit on the bed but he hadn’t yet managed to take pill that morning and all his insided burnt with sharp pain.
“Please, just lie,” Xiao Zhan told him, gently pressing on his shoulders, “I’ll go talk to him and be right back.”
And then the guy locked him in the room again.

Waiting for Xiao Zhan downstairs, Seung Yeon remembered talking with John the day before. As he’d told him in detail what he wanted from him and how he was planning to get rid of Wang Yibo. It was frightening to hear. But more frightening – to believe in it.

Seung Yeon saw that John was challenging him. And, of course, the leader looked right into Seung Yeon’s soul again: would you believe me, would you go, would you prove your loyalty?

Seung Yeon didn’t try to hide anything from John: either his fear or doubts, or bitter aftertaste lying right on the bottom of his heart. He’d mumbled some nonsense and excuses, had said:
“He won’t trust me, I won’t make it, Xiao Zhan is protecting Wang Yibo and never lets him out of his sight...”

“He will, you’ll make it,” John stroked his hair, “He has no other choice. He needs you as a doctor...”
“Seung Yeon?” Xiao Zhan appeared on the threshold. He looked at him, smiled with hope, “Did you come to check on Wang Yibo?”

A step. It stinged Seung Yeon’s heart but he said:
“Yes. But... no, not now. We need to talk, Xiao Zhan. And not here. Shall we go to a medical post?”

Xiao Zhan’s sight became serious, he nodded shortly and put his shoes on right in the entrance hall:
“Let’s go.

That’s easy. We don’t have to make it difficult.”
The guys went along the Family block to the Administrative one, absolutely not paying attention that someone was watching them from the corner. As they turned around the corner, a man went out of the neighboring house.
He stood, looking after Seun Yeon and Xiao Zhan, and then went straight to the house of Xiao family.

Seung Yeon unlocked the door of the medical post with his key and they both went inside. There the doctor felt he could speak freely, not hiding anything. He wanted to die on the spot, it was better then live through all that, but he understood he’d got into a trap. In a trap he couldn't get out of easily. He had to go through fear, humiliation, pain and guilt. That’s what his whole life had been leading him to... that was his Way turned out to be.

“We need to talk, Zhan,” he said. Damn, it seemed he felt sick. Seung Yeon leaned on the wall, Xiao Zhan frowned:
“You’re pale, Seung Yeon... you’re just like your white robe... what’s happened?”

“You’re right,” he wheezed. Well, okay, he didn’t really need to cry right now. As if it wasn’t enough humiliation for him... “You were right about everything.”
Xiao Zhan’s sight became wary, he looked at him with apprehension and asked cautiously:
“Seung Yeon, what was I right about?”
“He uses me, he’s always used,” he said, barely moving his lips, “He wants to kill Wang Yibo.”

Xiao Zhan had locked the door and left Wang Yibo all by himself. However, he wasn’t bored for long. The guy heard as the door slammed downstairs but Xiao Zhan wasn’t coming back. Seung Yeon might have led him somewhere.

However, just in couple of minutes someone knocked on the front door again. There was a noise of an opening door, then silence. Then heavy footsteps on the stairs. It wasn’t Xiao Zhan, Yibo would recognize his footsteps among a thousand, he’d learnt it for the last week. Mr. Xiao? Someone grabbed the handle from another side and here Wang Yibo’s heart twitched.

Of course, it was neither Xiao Zhan not mr. Xiao. The latter knew that his son locked the door of his room so why would he try to force his way in?
But then someone pulled the handle once again and again, tried to turn it.

Panic built up inside Wang Yibo’s chest, he tried to prop himself on the elbows but his chest ached. Ah, sure, he hadn’t still taken these damn pills...
It was like a horror movie: a lonely helpless man in a room and a stranger behind the door, wanting to come in.

“Who’s there?” Yibo shouted with a rising panic and then, with a treacherously trembling voice, “Mr. Xiao?”
It fell silent behind the door. Yibo managed to roll on his side and to pull himself up with the help of his legs. He was so tired of it already, he intently listened to the noises behind the door. First it was quiet, then he heard some stirring in the lock of the door. The handle shaked, someone tried to turn it several times, as if on trial, the stirring went on.

He’s trying to unlock the door with a skeleton key! – the guy guessed and fear gripped all his body. Wang Yibo guessed for the first time in his life that he would be killed now. Even when Chuckie and Dickie had broken into the rehearsing house, he hadn’t been as confident of it as at this moment.

They definitely had no other reason. No one would mutely and determinedly force into someone’s room just like that, ignoring any questions.
They came to kill him.

Yibo had experienced the same helplessness before, lying under the kicks of the twins with his hands cuffed. But he hadn’t been so scared even then.
“Who’s that?!” he shouted, “Fuck, who’s that?!”

And then the door unlocked. The lock clicked and the handle turned and then... Fred appeared at the door frame.
His tall figure occupied the whole frame, his head almost touched the lintel, he glanced at Wang Yibo and stepped into the room, carefully covering the door behind himself.
The appearance of Fred didn’t calm him, oh no. Vice versa, the fact that the laborer stood now in the house of the Familial and, moreover – broke into the room, meant a lot, really a lot.

Fred was just quietly looking at Yibo for some time, then glanced at the room, took a chair at the table, placed it at the bed of the patient and took a seat on it. The man leaned on his knees, a wide grin grew on his face and he asked:
“So, Wang Yibo, do you know why I’ve come here?”

Chapter Text

“So, Wang Yibo, do you know why I’ve come here?”
Yibo gulped nervously:
“I’ll scream,” he warned.

“Save your breath,” he responded calmly, “We’re alone here, anyway. Mister and missis Xiao decided to politely leave us alone, especially when they’d seen it,” the man lifted his arm and showed a trace of a round blue stamp on his wrist, “Do you know what it is? This’s John’s seal, that was enough for them.”

Yibo’s heart stirred so much that moment that it even echoed in his ribs.
“Have you come to kill me?” the guy asked fatefully.
“No,” Fred answered, but not convincingly, “I want to talk and learn something.”

Yibo was looking at him quietly and getting ready for... what? What was really getting ready for? For the conversation or that Fred would throw himself at him at any moment and would start to choke him with his bare hands? Was it possible to be ready for something like that?

“When you came to the community,” he started absolutely calmly, “I immediately understood that you were a fucking upstart. I admitted that. Then it turned out you were a faggot-upstart, okay, I can admit that too. But now I learned that you are a faggot-upstarted-related-to-the-cartel and I can’t wrap my head around it!” Yibo frowned at his words, he didn’t really get anything, “That’s why I want to know from you,” Fred continued, “how come you’re related to the cartel Sinaloa?”

Xiao Zhan looked at Seung Yeon and he was slightly confused. Not that he didn’t guess John’s intentions to remove Wang Yibo from the community, moreover, kill him, but when your darkest guesses were proved... that was really scary.

However, Seung Yeon was about to lose his consciousness in front of him: he went red, then pale, and here he started to slide down along the wall. Xiao Zhan dashed to take some water and put a full glass to the doctor’s lips:
“Please, drink some water,” he said almost gently, “Calm down and then tell me everything.”

Seung Yeon sat on the bed, finished the glass and breathed a little, coming back to his senses:
“My blood pressure probably jumped out of all these nerves... I didn’t sleep at night. I...” but he stopped complaining about his life just in time, having bitten his lip. He could complain to anyone but neither Xiao Zhan nor Yibo. Seung Yeon couldn’t even imagine how fucked they really were, “I was with John yesterday, he’d called me to... I thought he just wanted to spend time with me, or rather that’s what he told me but in reality... in general, he tried to talk me into killing Yibo.”

Seung Yeon hid his face in hands, then moaned hollowly and asked:
“I have it in a drawer... a tonometer. Please, give me one, I’m really sick...”

Xiao Zhan took the machine and helped Seung Yeon to put the sleeve on. The doctor measured his own pressure by himself, Zhan was obediently quiet, not interfering. He only asked then:
“You said – John tried to talk you into? Didn’’t order?”

“No,” the guy said, putting the tonometer back into his desk, “He wants me to do it by myself... wants.. oh. He’s challenging my loyalty, Zhan,” the guy opened one of his cupboards and fished out some pills from there. He took two at once, tiresomely sinking on a chair, “He wants me to win your trust, he wants that I convince you that I’m betraying John, that I’m ready to heal Yibo. And when I’m alone with him I should give him an injection.”

Xiao Zhan felt goosebumps running down his back. He looked at Seung Yeon with big eyes and the guy said:
“I know what you are thinking about...” the doctor casted a dark, haunted glance at him, “What are the guarantees that I’m sincere now and not trying to fulfill John’s plan...” Xiao Zhan was dejectedly quiet, and Seung Yeon said to himself: “No guarantees, Zhan. I feel that I’m trapped, I don’t know what to do...”

“Anyway, I’m not letting you get close to Wang Yibo anymore,” Xiao Zhan said to him firmly.
He nodded, understandingly:
“While John’s thinking I agree... Sure, he saw what I was like, and it’s still impossible to hide anything from him... I told him I would obey but... Zhan...” Seung Yeon’s voice trembled, and he got quiet for a moment, then sighed and continued, “I’m not a murderer. One thing is to hide a girl’s corpse, who was killed by accident. To cure boys who had coition is another one but... But murder... even I have limits.”

And he cried again, quietly, suppressing tears, just pressed his face against his hands and his skin reddened to the roots of his hair, his shoulders shuddered. Xiao Zhan watched him calmly. A lot of controversial emotions were running through him at that second but he said just:
“You can’t even imagine how glad I am to hear it from you.”

“Now John is thinking that I’m trying to win your trust...” Seung Yeon fished out tissues and blew his nose. He needed to wash his face, “I had to talk you into letting me to Yibo... If I hadn’t come to you, he would’ve understood I’m a disloyal coward.”

Seung Yeon came up to a sink and splashed water on his face. He had to calm down, anyway, he’d cried all night over his broken heart.
“You can prove you’re not a coward,” Xiao Zhan said seriously, “Moreover, you can prove you’re on our side.”

Seung Yeon looked at Xiao Zhan with a strange look on his face and answered:
“I don’t want to kill anyone. I don’t want Yibo to die.”
“Alright,” Xiao Zhan said, “then help us, Seung Yeon. I have a plan for you.”

“What?” Wang Yibo asked stupidly, “What cartel? I don’t understand what you’re talking about...”
Fred looked at his with curiosity in his eyes, then hummed wistfully, crossed arms on his chest:
“I have liaison beyond the perimeter,” he said, “I trust him, that’s a reliable person. I’ve been given clear instructions... to get you outta here.”

Wang Yibo opened his mouth wide. He couldn’t believe in what he’d just heard, and, sure, he hadn’t expected to hear something like that from Fred.
“I... have no idea... I...” the guy was nervous, he couldn’t think straight, “I... maybe... Sam? Old Sam? He’s the only one I could've given a signal for help when I’d been beyond the perimeter and that’s all...”

Fred hummed once again, looking at Yibo with a doubt. And then it dawned on the guy:
“Wait, and you... are you related to the cartel? What are you doing here? And how...”

“Lord, you have no idea what a place it is,” the man grimaced scornfully, “and who John is – too...” he sighed, “John himself was related to the cartel, not to Sinaloa but Juarez. He keeps this place as a cover for the cartel's business. I have no idea what exactly is going on here, but I’m sure that the Counsel of the Confidant is aware.”

“And who are you? A cop?” Yibo blurted but then answered his question himself, “No, you’re with Sinaloa! John knows about it! That’s why they’ve kept you with laborers for ages!”
“Yeah, he’s never trusted me,” Fred responded, “But can you imagine, now I have an all-time chance to prove my loyalty. Do you know where I have this seal from and why I’ve got the right to break into the Familial’s house? I have to kill you, Wang Yibo. John wants it.”

Yibo felt as everything froze within him. Fred just sat and looked at him and the guy’s heart stopped.
“You sorta told me that you weren’t going to do it,” he mumbled, “you told me the Sinaloa cartel told you to get me out of here...”

“Yeah, I have to help you run away this Friday,” he said calmly, “but I need to stay in the community and finally try to get promoted at the same time, get it? That’s a perfect chance to win John’s trust and become a really valuable liaison for the cartel.”

“And... what should we do?” Yibo sighed out. He was really confused out of stress, it seemed to him they were at a dead end.
“We have to satisfy need of both sides,” Fred blinked at him, “But for that your lovey-dovey and you have to manage to do something by Friday,” the man looked at the guy and by the panic becoming obvious on his face he guessed that the guy didn’t understand anything. He sighed and started to detail everything to Yibo, almost spelled, “John wants you dead, doesn’t he? Cartel wants you to get out of the ranch alive. You have to die for John, you fool, and with that escape from here.”

Yibo gulped. He said in the same slow manner:
“That could be a perfect plan but doesn’t it seem to you there’re a few “buts” in it?”
“That’s not really that difficult,” Fred waved a hand at him. “The only “but” here is that doctor man. We can’t do without him. But John’d forseen that, he’s not a fool after all. I think he’ll be on his side.

“Seung Yeon?”
“Yeah, him. The doctor man had to take Xiao Zhan out of the house today so that I could get to you. I think he’s on John's leash.”

“And he... did it?” Yibo sighed out.
“I’m here,” he spread his hands.

“You have to be killing me right now while Seung Yeon is handling Xiao Zhan?” Yibo felt a lump stuck in his throat.
“Yeah,” Fred was really calm and absolutely unfazed. “But Victor told me to do everything quietly, without much noise. So I’ve used the master key and didn’t kick the door open. They don’t want to attract much attention to your murder.”

“And what are you gonna do?”
“I’ll tell them I didn’t manage to sneak to you today,” he shrugged. “I’ll tell them Xiao Zhan is keeping you under lock and key and it’s difficult to sneak to you quietly. I’ll offer them another option.”

“Which one?” Yibo’s lips were moving but his voice was gone.
“Lure you out of here and “kill” you in some other place. Let’s say, at Seung Yeon, at the medical post. You’ll lie there until they decide to bring you beyond the perimeter, like that girl. But if you really want to get out of here alive and not with a broken neck, doctor mans need to be on our side.

They looked at each other attentively. Now Wang Yibo understood everything. Fred’s plan was clear as ever.
“What do you think, Wang Yibo,” he asked him finally, “Your lovey-dovey and you, will you lure the doctor man to our side?”

Xiao Zhan came back home from Seun Yeon really worn out. They’d discussed the plan of actions so long, and now his head was overwhelmed with nuances they had to take into account. His parents weren’t at home. He went upstairs and opened the door with his key. Wang Yibo was awake. He was sitting with a strange blue-purple out of beating face, and was looking before him.

“Hi,” Xiao Zhan told him, closing the door, “Sorry, it took so long. I have news for you.”
“You won’t believe it,” Wang Yibo told him, “but I do too.”

When Xiao Zhan told him about Seung Yein and he, in his turn, told him about Fred and his plan, they both fell silent for some time, thinking about everything.
“Does it mean Seung Yeon had to take me away to clear the path for Fred?” Zhan dragged on wistfully.

“That’s what Victor told Fred,” Yibo responded. “The question is: did Seung Yeon know about that? Did he know Fred had to come kill me today and John just checked his loyalty?”
“I want to trust Seung Yeon,” Xiao Zhan sighed and, seeing Yibo’s surprised sight, he explained, “I seemed to me he was genuine today. I’m afraid to trust him, Yibo, I can’t afford it...”

“However, we can’t do without him, anyway,” Yibo announced, “We have to risk everything and trust him. Do or die.”
Xiao Zhan looked at Yibo doubtfully, biting his lip.

“You already know how Seung Yeon can prove he’s on our side,” Yibo tried to calm and reassure him, “You’ve come up with a good plan. Imagine: why would Seung Yeon want such problems, why would he agree to that if he knew there’s Fred? How can I break into here and wring my neck like a chicken? If Seung Yeon knew about Fred he wouldn’t have humiliate himself in front of you, cry and promise to do what you asked him to.”

“He’s not done anything yet, Yibo...” Xiao Zhan said shyly.
“It won’t take long,” the guy said, “Give him a chance... to make amends for his mistakes.”

The evening of the same day Xiao Zhan went to the Assembly House for a Sunday event. They planned to show a movie again. The guy, as if accidentally, found Seung Joo, they talked to each other quietly at the side for some time. Then everyone watched an old black-and-white comedy, not really funny, for almost two hours. You would think Zhan was focused on the picture but in reality he was brainstorming their plan time after time. Anything could go wrong, in the case where there's a lot of people included, where they needed a heavy dose of risk and luck, there was no confidence in cases like that. It had to happen this Friday. Already this Friday. They had no time either for thinking or doubts or fears. Fred said that people who were going to help them beyond the perimeter would be ready on Friday. They had no other options. They had to reach beyond the perimeter by 11pm, it meant right after the curfew. Fred even told them the place where they would be waiting for them in cars. Something like that. It meant, Wang Yibo had to “die” this Thursday, to lie for the whole day under the cover at a medical post at Seung Yeon. It meant, they had to find the evidence on John till Thursday, so all that would make at least any sense...

That moment it seemed to Xiao Zhan that Yibo and him had an unbearable burden on their shoulders. That they wouldn’t make it, that they just went mad, imagined they would be able to outsmart John... But when disbelief and helplessness were about to capture his mind, the guy shook this illusion off himself, collected himself, and tried to believe. What could he actually do, anyway? If they didn’t try and take that risk – Yibo awaited death, and Xiao Zhan himself too. He would have no other choice to stay in this world, there would be the only way – after Mary Cole.

He saw as Sung Joo came up to Yixuan after the movie and took him to the side, they were nicely talking about something, as if about something unimportant. Mechanism was already working. Now all events would happen one after another, not depending on if Xiao Zhan was scared or not. He needed to hope for the better, he had to. For Yibo.

Monday. Morning. Seung Yeon was standing in front of John’s study, waiting until he would accept him. Kelly had told him he had Victor now, and they were having a really tense conversation. Despite the perfect soundisolation, Seung Yeon was still able to hear some phrases:
“...fucking bastard!.. I told you he’s got a mind of his own... you can tell me anything but...”

Then John’s shouts fell silent. Probably, Victor managed to convince him of something. Finally, the door opened and Victor left the room, frowning, glanced at Seung Yeon with a displeased sight, then just nodded at him and went away.
Seung Yeon came up to the door carefully, knocking weakly.

“Yeah,” annoyed. John was still outraged.
“That’s me, John,” the guy called quietly, “Can I?”
“Come in, Seung Yeon,” now softer, the guy went into the study.

John was standing at the window. He was still red out of recent emotions. Seung Yeon was afraid of him, he was afraid of John’s wrath like anyone else in their community.
“I’m here with a report, as usual, John,” the doctor said modestly.
“I know that you’re always good with it,” John responded, not turning to him, just beckoning the guy with a hand, “You’re always good, kitty, you’re the only one who’s never disappointed me.”

Seung Yeon put his file with a report on the table and approached John, ducking under his hand. Leader’s arms, big and warm, as usual, suddenly seemed to Seung Yeon surprisingly unpleasant. He couldn’t find the former sweetness in his embrace and, moreover, he couldn’t find the former calmness. Quite the opposite. He wanted to howl so much, but Seung Yeon stayed cool. He had a mission, and it was more important than his own feelings. He had to remember about it.

“You’d better tell me,” John asked, “if you talked to Xiao Zhan yesterday as you’d promised me?”
“Yeah, I led him to the medical post, and we talked,” Seung Yeon said, “I had to burst in tears in front of him, you know that was easy... My nerves are a bit row now.”
“There-there, baby, it will finish soon,” John kissed Seung Yeon’s head, hugging him with one hand, “Did he trust you?”

“I think, yes,” the doctor responded. “Anyway, he thanked me a lot that I was on their side...”
“*On their side*,” John chuckled, “Did he share his plans with you? What are they going to do with a boy?”

“No, we haven’t reached that point,” Cho Seung Yeon said carefully, “We just agreed for now that I would visit Yibo one day and examine him. Probably, I won’t be able to realize the plan not on the first attempt, John. I don’t think Xiao Zhan will leave us alone and get any medicine from my hands.”
“You’re my loyal boy,” the leader called him, giving him another kiss in the temple, “You’ve already proved you’re ready for everything for me. I don’t want you to become a killer, darling.”

“You don’t?” Seung Yeon lifted a questioning sight at him.
“Of course not,” the man said gently. “And you are not a killer, kitty, you’re too soft for that. Why should I break your psyche? Why should I spring test of such sort on you? I’ve just checked your loyalty, my little boy, and you’ve passed the test for now.’

“*For now?*” he whispered.
“I have another plan,” John said wistfully, looking out of the window and absent-mindedly playing with Seung Yeon’s hair, “You won’t have to do anything. Just open the doors of the medical post when needed, and then keep Wang Yibo’s body at yours and help us take it out of here just like with that girl, do you remember? Nothing difficult, kitty. Nothing you haven’t done before.”

John looked down at him and smiled, and Seung Yeon felt goosebumps running all over his body. To hide his emotions somehow he buried his face into man’s chest, embracing his waist with his hands:
“Thank you, John! Oh, thank you... you can’t imagine what a relief it is!”
“I know, my little boy...”

Young man’s hands stroked the older’s back, then the guy collected himself and lifted his sight at the leader, as shy and naive as he only could do that moment:
“You told me you were going to spend more time with me, John...”
“Oh, kitty...” John smiled and gently caught his face by chin, “What does my kitty want?”

“You,” Seung Yeon sighed out and stretched his pale lips in a smile. If only the corners didn’t tremble, “I always want only you, you know, John...”
“Baby,” the leader leaned to him a little and gave him a kiss. The kiss was long and passionate and, probably, Seung Yeon could have been filled with happiness because of it at least two days ago, but now... it brought only bitterness.

“Come to me on Wednesday,” John told him, “after dinner. I’m not going to call anyone for blessings, it’ll be only our evening.”
“Thank you, John,” Seung Yeon smiled at him again, “Wednesday will be ideal.”

Tuesday.
Xiao Zhan worked with laborers at the building site. Sometimes his sight crossed with Fred’s and the man hummed but didn’t come up to him and didn’t say anything. Why if everything had already been negotiated with Yibo?

In the evening after work Xiao Zhan met with Sung Joo and they walked unhurriedly, walking along the gravel path. But not for long. After that Xiao Zhan went home and Sung Joo headed to the White house where he asked Kelly to change his community call schedule. Then, as if by chance, he went to the neighboring wing to Yixuan and they said a few words to each other.

No one watched the guys, in general, so all those negotiations and movements weren’t stricking.
Seung Yeon went to the warehouse to Isaac on the same day and took the order from beyond the perimeter that he’d done just yesterday. Chauffeur who’d been changed by Wang Yibo for some time finally recovered, although not fully, however he had already begun his duties and managed to buy something for Seung Yeon in one store. The purchase was wrapped in an opaque package so that only Cho Seung Yeon and the driver Hank knew what that was.

Wang Yibo lay on the bed in Xiao Zhan’s room and thought, thought... He played their plan in his head time after time, trying to foresee possible scenarios for development. There were so many variations that his head started to ache.

The guy thought about Yixuan who was currently standing in his room and looked at the photo of his father and him. This photo had been taken back then in China, when they first had seen each other. Yixuan had been five and John had put him on his shoulders. It’d seemed to him that his father was a giant, a big man... It had seemed to him for all the following years, just in another way, until the current events. It seemed to him now that his father was a criminal, a pervert, a cruel cold man and a bastard he had to stop. Moreover, Yixuan would be able to look people in the eyes only if he stopped him.

Wang Yibo thought about Seung Yeon standing in front of the mirror at that moment, trying on what the driver Hank, blushing and embarrassed, bought for him in the lingerie store. Xiao Zhan told him John liked something like that sometimes. And tomorrow John had to be fully satisfied and relaxed so that they would manage to do what they were going to do. He felt odd and scared but for the same time in his life Seung Yeon felt he was doing something right.

Wang Yibo thought about Sung Joo what lied in his room at that moment and looked at his call schedule. Kelly made an excuse for him and changed him with one of the Brothers so that he would be at watch in the lookout tower again on Friday. That’s what they wanted – Sung Joo was full with a thrilling feeling of adventure and triumph. Just like when he’d shouted in the mic: “John is a fucking faggot!” He felt he would me able again to avenge himself and at the same time the other guys. That now he was a part of something really valuable, real. His life filled unexpectedly with a sense he hadn’t had before. He smiled.

Wang Yibo thought about Xiao Zhan who’d turned his life upside down, who suddenly became so strong, so stubborn. Yibo was proud of him. He took Zhan’s hand and quietly looked him in the eyes. They didn’t need words anymore. They’d discussed it in whispers a hundred times before. It seemed the Universe itself favored them, it could work. It could destroy at any moment but they were sure it would work. They would believe only in it.

“I love you,” Yibo said in the gathering twilight of the coming night.
“I love you,” Xiao Zhan repeated as an echo, kissing his hand.
And then the dawn came.

Chapter Text

Wednesday.

Xiao Zhan came to Seung Yeon’s home. The first hadn’t been his guest since childhood, what could have changed in the house of the Familial?
They locked themselves in the doctor’s room. The latter had already changed into the lingerie that driver Hank had bought for him in Las Cruces, desperately blushing and cursing the doctor-pervert.

Seung Yeon put on his casual trousers and shirt over the underwear so that Xiao Zhan was able to check out the color of the elastic, stretched out for the show:
“That’s good you took the white one,” the man nodded, approvingly, “Such a contrast, he’ll like it.”

Seung Yeon glanced at Xiao Zhan gloomily but didn’t say or comment anything. It was still strange for him that they talked now about something they’d never discussed before. They hadn’t discussed it with anyone after all. The guy still felt uneasy because of it.

Xiao Zhan had his mother’s cosmetic bag in his hands, he opened it and shaked off all its contents on the bed. The doctor frowned more:
“We could do without it earlier...”

“We were younger earlier,” Xiao Zhan said simply and strongly, “And you should understand it’s not a usual evening.”
Seung Yeon didn’t argue. For once he was going to rely on Xiao Zhan, understanding that mutual trust between them was necessary now. The guy sat on the bed, sighed:
“What should I do?”

“Nothing,” Xiao Zhan said, “just relax and sit calmly.”
He took his mother’s liquid eyeliner (his mother used it really rarely so it’d dried just a little. But that was even better) and leaned to Seung Yeon. The doctor felt Zhan’s breathing on his face. Some intimate silence built up between them and that was really not surprising, considering what they were doing and for what.

“What are you going to do when... you get out?” Seung Yeon asked as Xiao Zhan carefully and precisely made a line along his upper eyelid.
“What exactly are you asking about?” Xiao Zhan specified, because, sure, Yibo and him had a lot of plans.

“Not about John,” he clarified immediately, “I’d better not know at all what you’ve planned, no... What do you want to do in general? Further, afterwards.”
Xiao Zhan perfectly understood what the guy asked him about. He himself had had no concrete purposes or wishes when he’d thought about his possible life beyond the perimeter. He vaguely drew himself that life in case he found himself there, in freedom, but Xiao Zhan might have got confused, afraid and decided to get back to the community voluntarily.

But that had been before he met Yibo.
Yibo, like a ray of light, illuminated his Way now, became the reason for living and struggled for him. Yibo gave him a purpose and a desire, a drive to get something else from this life.

“Wang Yibo and I want to get married,” he confessed quietly and Cho Seung Yeon widened his eyes, “Seung Yeon! Look at you, you made a mess! Please, don’t open your eyes until the liner is not fully dried, I’ll tell you when... I have to start from scratch now... sit tight, oh...”

Xiao Zhan took cotton pads and a tonic, wiped off black stains and blew so that it would dry faster. He wasn’t a specialist in all that but... Seung Yeon hastily closed his eyes again, asked:
“Is it possible for men to get married like a normal couple?”

“Yibo told me it is,” Xiao Zhan said, getting back to doing cat eyes, “Yibo told me that beyond the perimeter they treat pederasts differently... Well, they view them normally, like usual people, without almost any negativity. And there’s an opportunity for people like us, Seung Yeon, to get married officially and even have children.”
Seung Yeon twitched but didn’t open his eyes this time, just asked confusedly:
“How?”

“Adoption, for example,” Zhan clarified, “So we want to get married and, probably, in the future...” he smiled at his wildest dream but then spoke about another thing, “And we want to travel. Yibo wants to take me to the ocean, to the Grand Canyon, I dream of flying on a plane and seeing winter and, maybe, visiting China one day. Ok, you can now. Open.”

And, when Seung Yeon looked at him again, Xiao Zhan saw some jealousy in his eyes, a little bit of sadness and a lot of frustration:
“I’d like to meet a person like that someday, like Wang Yibo,” the guy told him quietly, “I don’t dream about more.”

Suddenly Xiao Zhan sympathized with Seung Yeon. He perfectly understood him, he shared his pain and sympathized with him but he couldn’t really help him. He only pushed him into the embrace of a person who’d broken their lives, to reach his goal. Probably he wasn’t that different from his parents, was he?

“You will,” Xiao Zhan said for some reason, “Definitely.”
Then he put some lipstick on Seung Yeon’s lips, added some color on his pale cheekbones.

“Well,” Xiao Zhan felt as he started getting nervous himself, “you’re ready.”
Seung Yeon got up and looked at himself in the mirror.

“You know,” he suddenly remembered, “Wang Yibo told me that I was beautiful.”
It didn’t sound like an affront, Xiao Zhan didn’t know himself why he wasn’t angry at that passage at the moment. Probably because he felt – Seung Yeon didn’t want to hurt Xiao Zhan, and he said it in an attempt to give himself more confidence, more energy and courage.
“That’s true,” Xiao Zhan smiled generously, “You have always been beautiful.”

Cho Seung Yeon was heading to the White House. He was scared. Because he’d never lied to John before and had never even thought he was capable of it. Quite the opposite, Seung Yeon had been sure all his life that John saw through him, and everyone, that John was impossible to get fooled.

So he threw himself into this adventure like into the deep end. He sang quietly under his breath, moving his almost cotton feet in the direction of his leader's house.
“We... are the champions... my friend...” his heart beat wildly to the rhythm of his steps, “And we’ll... keep on fighting till the end...” he went up the steps and knocked on the door, “We are the champions... we are the champions...” One of the Sisters, who was on watch that evening in the White house, opened the door to him. No emotions related to his look, and the makeup on his face. She didn’t look at Seung Yeon’s face at all, just let him in, “No time... for losers...” he went upstairs and knocked on the study’s door, “Cause we are the champions... of the world...”

“Come in, Seung Yeon.”
John was listening to the Italian opera – aria of Almirena from the opera “Rinaldo”. He was sitting in his favorite chair, relaxed, half-lidded eyes and slightly conducted for himself to the melody. The guy came up to him and touched his shoulder, leaning to his cheek with a light kiss:
“Hello, John.”

The man opened one eye but, having noticed Seung Yeon’s makeup, he widely opened his eyes and looked at the guy questioningly.
“Xiao Zhan once... told me you liked it sometimes,” Seung Yeon tried to explain himself, genuinely embarrassed.

The man looked at him attentively, almost strictly:
“I didn’t know Xiao Zhan and you discuss things like that... I thought you kept to yourself everything that’s between us.”

The guy embarrassed even more, his face fell fully, he mumbled:
“Sorry, you’re right, I shouldn’t have done something like that, that’s so stupid...”

“Come here,” John pulled Seung Yeon to himself to sit on his lap, and the guy obediently sat, still burning with shame. John looked his Nightingale in the eyes, “Are you trying to replace Xiao Zhan like that?”

Seung Yeon got absolutely confused. He didn’t know what was right to say, he vaguely shaked his head. John sighed:
“You can’t replace Xiao Zhan, kitty. He’ll always have a special separate place in my heart. Don’t try to outshine him, please. Be yourself.”

“Sorry, John. You’re right...” Seung Yeon whispered.
“Makeup looks better on him than on you,” John touched his slightly colored lips with a thumb, “It doesn’t suit you at all.”

“Sorry, John. I... I bought beyond the perimeter... I think I’d better take it off now.”
“Take off?” the leader raised his white brows and slid his hand down to his fly, “What’s there? What have you worn?”

“No, don’t look, John,” Seung Yeon hid his face in the crook of his neck, “You’re right, it doesn’t suit me...”
“Show me, I want to see,” John undid his fly and immediately slid his hand down, reaching the net of the lingerie, “Seung Yeon!” he dragged on, “Do you want to be a little bad-behaved sweet boy?”

Seung Yeon’s face scorched, he involuntarily aroused but he still minded his mission so he carefully pulled away his crotch from the hand:
“I’ll take it off, I shouldn’t have bought it at all...”’

“No, I like it,” the man suddenly announced, “I want to see you fully. Take off your clothes,” The guy stood in the leader’s lap and, first, unbuttoned his shirt, then he pulled down his trousers, exposing himself almost fully. He stood in front of John in white net thong that was stretched by his semi-aroused cock, white stockings and suspender. Like a bride, “Oh, kitty... What a surprise... You’re so hot. Come here.”

Seung Yeon carefully approached John. He shouldn’t have done any sudden moves, otherwise his little deception that he’d hid, would become obvious. He shouldn't get aroused too much.
“Oh, how beautiful you are, kitty...” John greedily ran his hands over his bare tummy and legs, “Turn, I wanna see your little butt...”

Seung Yeon turned. Small thong sinked in between his buttocks but John seemed to only get aroused from that. He moaned, pleased, and kept touching him, kneading, and the guy just prayed that John wouldn’t start to pull down this thong right now.

“Good boy!” John smacked his buttock and Seung Yeon staggered, slightly evading:
“I’m glad you liked it. Do you want me to pour you a drink?”

“No,” he waved, “I wanna spank you.”
“John...” It wasn't Seung Yeon’s plan. Not spanks, but the fact he rejected a drink. He had never rejected it and now suddenly... “Don’t you really want to?”
“No, come here, lay your stomach on my lap...

Wait, John...” Seung Yeon didn’t know what to do. He backed away from his hands again and moved back to the side of the mini-bar, “Then don’t you mind if I pour myself a drink? I’m... embarrassed because of all of it, that’s unusual.”

“Kitty, you are like a baby,” he grinned but didn’t argue.
Aria on the vinyl finished but another one started automatically.

“Do you know what she’s singing about?” John asked as if by chance, unbuttoning the hem of his shirt and warming up his neck”.
“About what?” Seung Yeon approached the mini-bar and poured himself some brandy with a trembling hand. He didn’t like strong drinks but he didn’t have much choice. The main thing was for John to drink it.

“This girl is trapped by an evil witch,” he said imposingly. He liked to enlighten, “and she’s bitterly mourning her fate.”
*Sounds like about all of us,*– the guy thought but out loud he asked:
“So, is there no hope at all?”

“Oh, her beloved, Rinaldo, is already rushing to her, but she doesn’t know about it yet...”
“I see...” Seung Yeon mixed a glass of brandy just exactly like John preferred it, and then with an imperceptible movement he slightly fixed his lingerie, taking out from between his member and scrotum a little paper square package containing sleeping aid. That was his secret weapon and sheer thong was just a distraction. As if look, I’m almost naked, so defenseless and safe... John shouldn’t have suspected anything.

“What’s holding you up?” Seung Yeon heard.
“I decided to water it for myself,” he smiled lightly to the man, looking over his shoulder, “I’m coming.”

Seung Yeon got back to his beloved with a glass of brandy and offered it to him, but he waved it off again, stretching out hands to his ass. Then he had to put his glass aside and finally lay on his laps, waiting through the series of smacks on his buttocks that Seung Yeon eventually got aroused from for the leader's pleasure.
“I’m fucking you right here, on this table, my baby,” he said it into his face, crushing his lips with a rough kiss.
“No, let’s better go to the bedroom,” he scorchingly answered and, running from his study at first, he took the glass with himself.

John went after Seung Yeon and threw him on the bed, roaring from the arousal. He wanted sex, he wanted Seung Yeon but, fuck, he didn’t want the brandy. The guy didn’t know what to do. Finally, in the last attempt to get him drunk, Seung Yeon took the initiative from John, climbed on him, rubbing against his boner, then he took the glass with alcohol and took a small sip. He kept the second sip in his mouth and pressed his lips against John’s. The man chuckled but accepted the rules, drinking everything right from his mouth.
“Seung Yeon, you’re very playful today,” John noticed, running his hands along his hips, buttocks and member, “Why haven’t you been like that earlier?”

“Xiao Zhan was an obstacle,” he said boldly, taking another sip of brandy. John accepted it too, Seung Yeon had to swallow the rest, “I’ve always compared myself with him but now... now I know that I’m your first Nightingale and I’m good.”
One more sip, the pre-last. John accepted it reluctantly this time, however, he praised the guy:
“You’re good. I like liberated boys. I have enough bashfulness in the choir.”

Seung Yeon took the last sip, but John winced, he didn’t want to drink and Seung Yeon had to take the last portion of sleeping aid himself. It seemed they both would fall asleep today. Maybe that was for the better, he just had to call Yixuan.
“Come to me,” John whispered greedily, already pushing his fingers into his hole.

Seung Yeon moaned. He hadn’t still had sex for a while, his smacked buttocks burnt, blood streamed to the crotch, he wanted John and he still... loved him. Things like that don’t go away in one night. He loved him with his sad and frustrating childish love, despite his broken heart, despite his everlasting supporting role, despite the fact it had never been really mutual.

“John...” the guy pressed against his lips, feeling as he was butting against his rim with the head of his cock, he sank down to him.
“Kitty...” the man entered him and started his push from below, Seung Yeon took over the rhythm and moved by himself from above, changing the pace. He should have let him come before. If the man got drowsy after the orgasm then he would fall asleep faster and easier. So Seung Yeon tried to do his best, it seemed from the side that, maybe, he’d starved for so long and went mad, but John like that crazy race, he had a boner and this time even without the viagra, and, moreover, Seung Yeon tried so hard...

“Baby, I’m... do you want to empty me?” he managed to say, biting his lips from the tension.
“Yes!” the guy shouted almost angrily. He was all covered with sweat, “I want... to milk you with my butt until you are dry, John!”
“Damn, kitty... I should’ve pushed back that always complaining Xiao Zhan earlier. If only I knew you are such a hot peach...”

And he came inside Seung Yeon, pressing him against himself with his thigh. The guy lied on his lover's chest, listening to John’s wildly beating heart getting back to normal. Hardly had his dick managed to get limp in Seung Yeon’s butt, when he himself was already sleeping and even snoring.
“John?” the guy cautiously lifted his head, “John? Are you sleeping?”

The man looked tranquil and fully relaxed. Seung Yeon himself felt drowsiness and some kind of weakness. He didn’t come but he didn’t really think about it right now. The doctor lightly smacked John’s cheeks but the man only snorted.
He climbed from the man and the bed with difficulty, his head became so heavy... He had to call Yixuan.

He picked up a messed cover from the floor, took one of its ends from below John’s feet, put it on his shoulders, hiding his nakedness.
Lord, he wanted to sleep so much... Sleepiness was dramatically coming on him, with irresistible force. Unsteadily, he left the bedroom and called:
“Yixuan! Yixuan...” Kelly had already left her place, the house seemed empty. God, he would lie right here, at the threshold, and fall asleep... “Yixuan...”

He appeared in front of him as if from nowhere: worried, with glowing eyes.
“Is father sleeping?” he sighed out, looking at Seung Yeon from head to toe. Of course, he couldn’t miss the messed up makeup and nylon of his stocking that were seen from behind the cover.

“Yes,” Seung Yeon said. His eyes were heavy, “I made it...”
“You’re good,” Yixuan carefully touched his shoulder, “Go to bed, I’ll handle the rest.”
Seung Yeon nodded, got back to the bed, lay next to John, covering them both with a blanket, and fell asleep with relief.

Zhou Yixuan started with a raid. He had to find father’s key to the desk, he also knew there was a safe behind the painting and, of course, the private laptop – those spots and things Yixuan had never had access to. To be honest, there wasn't just the sense of duty, belief in his rightness and a wish to reveal the truth about his father to the world that he was driven by. He was also curious. He died to sneak into his secrets and learn everything to the end. He thought he had the right for that by birth, he wildly wanted to see all the uncovered, ugly truth as it was to get rid of the feeling of guilt, to understand that he was on the right way, his Way.

The key to the desk was found in the glasses case/ Yixuan opened the drawer and, first, found two black files for accountancy – the father’s one and the one he’d made for him and then took it away. He had to do another copy of the father’s file. Even if there were no child’s pornography films then this file itself was able to drive the authorities’ attention. Yixuan really doubted his father had been faithfully paying taxes for his shadow business all these years.

There wasn’t anything special in his drawer except for the key to the safe. The guy found there just some financial credit documents, some packs of notes, usual documents. So he decided not to touch anything and left it as it was.

Having sat and opened the father’s laptop, the guy found out that it was password protected. Of course, who’d doubt. And there was no password anywhere. It wasn’t on the sticker, put on the laptop as it always happens among old people, it wasn’t written in John’s diary. The leader remembered all those eight figures, remembered it rather well so as not to write it down. It meant, it wasn’t random. Damn, some date? It could be anything but Yixuan really hoped his father was sentimental here and chose some remarkable date for his passwords. The guy started to guess the options: John’s birthday, the day of the community foundation, the date of his first book release, the day of his wedding with mother, they day of his wedding with Mary Cole (but he wasn’t sure here he remembered it right, despite that all children of the community learnt John’s biography by heart). After five attempts the window blocked and he saw red words on the screen: “Try again in two hours.”

“Damn!” Yixuan thought. He would mess with this password all night. He didn’t have much choice though. To kill the two hours Yixuan took the black file and headed to Kelly, to her workplace, to make the copy.
The file was thick, and he meditatively put in the scanner sheet after sheet, silently looking at how the machine made a noise and how the line of light was running back and forth, and was still thinking of the password.

And then the idea dawned on him. What if... the password was his birthdate? Or some other date, related to him, to Yixuan? That wasn’t a high chance but why not, damn hell? Because in case of his father’s passing away, and in general, in case of his death all the power, all the information, documents and the rest would be gotten by Yixuan. Maybe the logic was that the heir would get access to all the information? Otherwise how would he fully take the power?

Having impatiently waited until the two hours of blocking were over, the guy decided to try again, one more time. With his almost bated heart he typed the date of his birth in the window, but the password turned out to be wrong. Yeah, yeah... who the hell was he? Just his son and heir... That seemed not enough for John to...
Yixuan froze: a vague guess stinged him again, he typed a new password before the thought managed to form fully in his head. And he saw welcoming green words: “Welcome, Jack!” What?

Yixuan was startled, foolishly looking at the screen. Jack? His dead older brother Jack? What the...
John’s laptop, sure, was old, but not so much to belong to his deceased brother, they hadn’t probably even released the one like that at that time. What did it have to do with it? Did his father really miss him?

Anyway, he could think about it later and now Yixuan kept looking through all the documents stored on the SD. Three hours left before he found this folder: “Usignoli”. If only he knew Italian he would understand it was called “Nightingales.” But he didn’t know Italian unlike his father, and he just got into it like the previous ones, in an attempt to find something compromising. However its contents still were unexpected for him.

The folder contained more then twenty subfolders, each of then was named after someone: “Giovanni”, “Tom Arquette”, “Jun Hatsumoto”, “Mark Tomashevski”, “Vinsent”, “Lucas”, “Augustin”, some of the names were more than familiar to Yixuan: “Cho Seung Yeon”, “Xiao Zhan” and even (here the man shuddered inwardly with disgust) “Chuckie and Dickie”.
Creation dates of folders were all different, his father created and filled his dreadful collection year after year, like a maniac. The newest one was made in 2016. It meant John hadn’t taken any photos and shooted any videos in recent years.

Yixuan was scared to look inside because he knew what he’d found there. He did but hadn’t he ransacked all his father’s office just for the sake of that? That was it, the dreadful and disgusting truth about his father. Taste it, drink it down to the pit, choke on it.
The guy exhaled sharply, collected himself and opened the folder “Xiao Zhan.”

The screen immediately filled with erotic semi-naked photos of his friend that had been obviously made several years ago, with a simple film and polaroid and then were digitized. There were some icons of the videos below.
Yixuan’s lips trembled. He felt tormenting shame for his father, paradoxical guilt, though he understood he wasn’t guilty of anything. And, starting to play one of the videos, the guy punished himself for that, clearing from the inside.

The picture came to life, and there was Xiao Zhan in it – still a teenager, tall and clumsy, with narrow chest and shoulders, small buttocks. He was looking at someone behind the camera and there was no hope in his eyes. John appeared in the frame. It was stupid to record himself a bit, probably, that was some special narcissistic act for him, bringing the note of voluptuousness. As if that wasn’t anyone but me owning this boy, ah, I am so good.

John was wearing only his boxer briefs, his father always had a good fit body after all. He stroked boy’s face and told him:
“So cute... Look at the little red light, here...” a nod to the camera, and Xiao Zhan turned his bullied sight to the camera without any hope, which made Yixuan feel goosebumps running over his back, “Good boy, now turn, lie on your tummy, accept my blessing...”

And when the little boy in the video did it Zhou Yixuan couldn’t stand anymore and burst into tears.

Two hours later he lay in his room and looked at the pile of freshly copied documents and also at the small SD card that lay on top. He had doubted before this evening. He had doubted until the very last minute. Now he felt as free as ever.

Chapter Text

Thursday.

Working at the building site on that day Xiao Zhan always looked back at Fred to understand for himself if the crucial part of their escape was going to happen that day or not. The guy just knew that “the murder” had to take place closer to the night so as not to attract unwanted attention. Fred and Yibo had already discussed it at the very beginning. But when? Today or tomorrow? Zhan kept turning to Fred in an attempt to understand that somehow but it was difficult to tell something by the man’s looks. Finally, Fred, intentionally, so that Zhan could hear him, called Ron and ordered:

“Go to Seung Yeon. He kinda wanted me to come by and help him with something. Ask him if he need me today, okay?”

The guy nodded and ran away and then Fred, for the first time, looked back at Xiao Zhan and chuckled.

Ron-Take-This-Bring-That came back in seven minutes and loudly reported so that it was difficult to not hear him:

“Fred, Seung Yeon said it’s definitely not today. He has one of the Nightingales with an attack of appendix. They’re taking him to Las Cruces now.”

“Got it,” Fred nodded, “then tomorrow.”

All the way passed in a lingering expectation of news.

The plan was following: after the end of the working day Cho Seung Yeon calls Yibo as if to unofficially examine him and give him medicine. Fred waits for the guy there and “kills” him. No one could tell how that would go in real life but no one could know anything for sure. And, of course, no details.

On Thursday’s evening and even part of the night Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo waited for someone to eventually come for them but everything was calm. Seung Yeon might have really taken the kid to the hospital.

Friday.

Xiao Zhan was nervous for the whole day. He grew anxious and couldn’t control himself as it always happened to him in such a condition. He kept glancing nervously at Fred but the man ignored him and didn’t approach.

Zhan was afraid most of all that Seung Yeon and Fred would turn out to be traitors. That all their support was just a game, just to drop his guard.

Something could be happening to Yibo right at this moment and he had no idea of that, got stuck at this building site. That’s why Xiao Zhan kept having lunch at home, and after lunch and after his shift that day his beloved was alright.

Of course, Yibo was also in a state of limbo. He was slowly but surely recovering, he easily got off bed and even complained:

“Can you please lock me in here? I’m like a princess in the tower. Fred and his break-in proved that neither door can stop him if he wants to kill me. I just wanna go outside...”

“Where are you going to go?” Xiao Zhan reasonably asked him, and the guy was silent because he didn’t have the answer. But Xiao Zhan stopped locking him.

And on Friday after work and dinner, when they both were in the room, Xiao Zhan’s father knocked on their door:

“Zhan, Seung Yeon got me a note for you today,” he was a little embarrassed, giving his son a folded piece of paper, “I’ve looked at it. And there he asks you... And Yibo to go to the medical post after dinner, probably, for an examination.”

Xiao Zhan attentively looked his father in the eyes, accepted the note and said just in case:

“Don’t tell anyone, okay?”

The man pursed his lips:

“You know what I think of it all,” and then he left.

Zhan also wondered if his father knew that Yibo was invited to the medical post to be “killed” or if he just conveyed the note and that’s it? It seemed Xiao Zhan grew paranoid.

“That’s it,” he told Wang Yibo, “It started.”

“We go?” he asked simply and shortly, and the guys left Xiao’s house and slowly headed to the medical post.

Both were intensely silent. Yibo walked slowly, trying to step softer so that his steps wouldn’t echo in his chest. Xiao Zhan took him by his elbow and nervously bit lips, then asked:

“You afraid?”

Yibo didn’t react anyhow, keeping walking, then answered gloomily:

“No. I’m just already sick of it. I want it to end.”

But, of course, he was afraid. He just didn’t confess.

Seung Yeon bit his nails and kept glancing at the window. Everything had ruined yesterday because of the kid’s appendix, the boy was successfully sent to Las Cruces but deep in his soul he was even glad that had happened. The doctor didn’t want to take part in it even indirectly, he burned with shame when got the note for Zhan through the older Xiao. How was that going to happen? Would there be any unforeseen circumstances?

Damn, sure they would be! After all they were just dilettantes, decided to play a staged murder! Should they at all expect that it would work?

Seung Yeon barely thought of it when the unforeseen circumstances knocked right on the door of the medical post. At the door there was Fred and... Victor. Seung Yeon peered at him in a silent shock, and in his mind there was just repeated “damn, damn, damn, damn...”

“I thought you would be alone,” Seung Yeon said to Fred.

“Boys, do you think I would leave you unsupervised? Brother Victor reasonably said, “John believes that everything is finished only when I tell him so.”

“But you can’t go inside,” Seung Yeon realized and went out to the terrace to the men, not letting them into the room, “If Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo see you they will figure everything out and start panicking.

“That’s true,” Fred supported, “I offer to do the following: Victor and I will stay aside. When Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo come, give me a sign at the window and I’ll come and break his neck. Distract Xiao Zhan with something, take him to the father's room.”

Seung Yeon licked lips.

“Good. What’s then? When Xiao Zhan sees Yibo is dead he’ll get mad...”

“I can just knock him out,” the man shrugged.

“I just need to make sure the case is done,” Victor interrupted, “I’m not going to stay here for long.”

“They’ll come soon,” Seung Yeon looked around the corner, at the road, “Damn, they are coming... Go somewhere!”

They didn’t see anyone on the way to the medical post, that was even strange. The citizens of the community might probably have rest after dinner at their homes or in their bunks, after the tiring workweek. Approaching the medical post, Xiao Zhan noticed someone and quietly cursed:

“What’s wrong?” Wang Yibo was too concentrated on his own feelings.

“Don’t you turn back,” he said through gritted teeth, “Victor is here.”

“Did he understand you noticed him?”

“I think he did, damn... I knew something was gonna happen...” Yibo interrupted him and moaned, going up the small steps to the medical post.

Seung Yeon met them, white like chalk.

“Victor’s here, I saw him,” Xiao Zhan told him at the door, closing it behind them.

“I know, he came to make sure it will really be finished,” Seung Yeon told him forcefully, “That plan’s the following: I need to distract you, Xiao Zhan, give Fred a signal and then he will come in and... do everything and then Victor will testify all it.”

“That’s crazy...” Xiao Zhan turned his feverish sight from Yibo to Seung Yeon, “And how’s he supposed to testify Yibo is really dead?”

“He shouldn’t touch Yibo,” Seung Yeon said firmly, “he would understand everything otherwise.”

“We need to distract Victor with something... so he would stay away from me,” Yibo noticed.

Seung Yeon looked nervously at the window:

“I need to call Fred. Go away from the door so that no one will accidentally see you...” the doctor came to the window and waved a hand.

Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo hid in the corner. In a moment the door opened quietly and Fred sneaked into the room. He looked at the three guys:

“So, how’s it going?”

“We are thinking about how to get rid of Victor,” Yibo said.

“How’s he?” Seung Yeon asked nervously.

“He’s waiting for me to come out and tell him it’s done,” the man said. “Do you have any idea how to distract him?”

“I have the one,” Xiao Zhan suddenly said, his eyes lit, and the next moment he desperately cried, “Yibo!!”

Yibo, Fred and Seung Yeon stared at him in silent shock but then he whispered:

“No time to explain, trust me,” and then again in full voice, “No, Yibo!!

And no one managed to understand anything when Xiao Zhan dashed outside and, having easily detected Victor, he threw his fists at him.

“Zhan!” Yibo involuntarily cried but Fred immediately silenced his mouth with a hand:

“Hush, boy, be quiet, now you are officially a deadman,” and then he wrestled him to the floor, listening to what was happening outside.

And there Xiao Zhan was crying and fighting with Victor, or rather he was attacking him and Victor tried to protect himself:

“Son of a bitch, prick! That’s all because of you, you all!” Xiao Zhan cried and then, suddenly, genuinely burst into tears. Tension of the last days left him in waves and he really felt better, “John promised me Yibo would live! He promised me!”

“That would work,” Fred said, turning to the guys.

“That’s still not enough,” Seung Yeon said and dashed to the fridge with medicine, “Yibo, let me give you an injection.”

“What?” Wang Yibo lifted his head from the floor where Fred had carefully wrestled him, “What injection?”

“Tranquilizers,” Seung Yeon had already taken out some ampoules and filled them with a syringe. He acted quickly, clearly as if he was at the operation like a real doctor, “Victor can feel your pulse or start shaking you, or lift your lids or hit your painful spot... It’s more difficult to pretend to be dead than you think, but you can fall asleep...”

That moment he heard Victors voice from the street:

“Fred! Fred, help me!”

“If I were you, I’d listen to doc, lad,” the man said to him over the shoulder and ran out the door.

Victor tried his best to hold back Xiao Zhan’s hands so that he didn’t throw them at him again. He told to the approaching Fred:

“For God’s sake, do something with him, he’s gone mad...”

Fred quickly ran to them from behind Xiao Zhan’s back and slapped the guy’s ear with two hands. Xiao Zhan abruptly inhaled and fell in Fred’s arms, the man sacked the thin Asian on his broad shoulder:

“That’s it,” the man grinned, “I’ll take him to his parents. How are you? It’s ok?”

“Yeah, damn hell...” Victor spat to the side, “He’s cried too loudly, that’s bad... Take Brother Xiao home, and I’ll go check how the boy’s doing.”

Seung Yeon opened some more ampoules but poured the contents right into the sink, leaving the empty glass items on the tables:

“You’ll fall asleep, your body will relax and even your pulse will slow down...” he took a syringe with one dose and approached Yibo, “Do you trust me?”

They looked each other in the eyes for a second, Yibo licked lips and then they both heard as Xiao Zhan’s cry broke off. Yibo instinctively wanted to run outside and see if he was alright but he understood that he couldn’t and resolved dramatically fast:

“Yeah, I trust you. Stab.”

Seung Yeon’s hands didn’t shake. Doctor even didn’t expect such coolness from himself that he hadn’t yet had the day before when he had soldered John. He leaned to Yibo’s hand, stroked it with a cotton pad soaked in spirit and gave such a cleat shot, injecting the medicine.

Seung Yeon’s and Yibo’s eyes met again. Yibo leaned back, feeling as his arm was burning but that spreading heat in his veins calmed and soothed him. Seung Yeon took his hand, leaned closer and whispered:

“You’re gonna be alright, I promise,” and then almost secretly, lightly and weightlessly touched him with his lips, pulling away.

“Damn,” Wang Yibo thought, closing eyes, “It seems he likes me.”

When Victor appeared in the medical post, Cho Seung Yeon was getting up from his knees, holding the used syringe in his hands.

“So what?” Victor asked, breathing heavily. Xiao Zhan stretched and almost ripped his collar and had managed to ruffle the man pretty badly, “Is he dead?”

“Not yet,” Seung Yeon said, “but he’ll be very soon. Fred just knocked him off so that I decided to reinsure.”

He calmly stepped aside from Yibo’s body and threw the syringe away into the special container.

“All this woodcutter can do is knock it out,” Victor said and leaned to Yibo, “It seems he’s still breathing...”

“You can try feel his pulse and you’ll find it’s slowing down,” Seung Yeon said coolly, running the water and washing hands, “I’ve got him several doses of barbiturates,” he nodded at the table where still lay empty ampoules, “he’ll not wake up anymore.”

Victor pressed two fingers against Yibo’s neck and frowned:

“It seems, yeah, it’s slowing down... damn!” he drew his hand back with disgust, got up and came to the sink too, “I don’t like touching deadmen.”

“He’s not a deadman yet,” Seung Yeon came back to Yibo, took his wrist, as if feeling the guy’s pulse stopping, “And now... it seems... that’s it.”

Victor glanced back at them over the shoulder. Seung Yeon ceremoniously released Yibo’s hand and it dropped on the floor.

“Help me move him to the bunk,” the doctor stood at Yibo’s head, taking him by armpits. Victor came up and took his legs. The men hoisted the body on the bunk, Seung Yeon lay his hands parallel to his sides and then dragged off a light cover from the neighboring bed and put it on Yibo from head to toe, “Tell John, I’ve done it.”

Victor looked at him understandingly, but Seung Yeon still clarified:

“Tell him, I didn’t stay away. I’m not a coward. He thought I wouldn’t do that but that’s not true.”

“I’ll tell him,” Victor nodded, “Good job, Seung Yeon. Today you’ve been a real man,” he straightened his back, dusted himself off and adjusted his clothes, “You’re taking him out at night after the curfew, like last time. It worked well with Jessica-Ann, they still haven’t found her body.”

“I know what to do,” Seung Yeon nodded, “Who’s taking him out?”

“Hank, like last time, he’s already in service...”

“Hank is an idiot,” the doctor argued, “What if he gets into an accident on his way back again? Tell Fred to do it, he’s reliable.”

“No, we can’t let Fred out,” he shaked his head, “He’s seen too much. Now we're accepting him into the Brotherhood and will put him under a travel ban. We had doubts about him earlier that he kept in touch with...” Victor broke off and glanced at Seung Yeon. He was talking too much, “Well, Hank will do it, as usual. Take care of everything.”

Wang Yibo heard as Victor entered the room, and all their conversation though he quickly fell asleep. But he felt as Victor checked his pulse, how they took him by arms and legs then and moved him to the bed, how Seung Yeon covered him with something. He was not afraid. He just wanted to sleep, he was swept by some stillness and peaceful nothingness, and the guy gave himself away to this flow. On the outskirts of his mind a thought flashed: “What if that’s all? What if it’s the end?” but the chemicals in his blood whispered sweetly: “And what? That’s none of your business anymore. Sleep.” And he fell asleep with relief.

And woke up in a complete darkness and some stuffiness. He needed a moment to realize where he was, to remember what had happened to him. He was “dead”, oh Lord, he was dead for all those people... It was extremely strange. Yibo listened to what was in the room where he lay but he couldn’t really hear anything. Damn, was it worth it to let know he was awake? What if Victor or someone else was in the room?

Suddenly Yibo heard knock on the door and steps in the room, screech and then somebody outside said:

“Hank said the car is ready.”

“Great,” that was Seung Yeon’s voice, “He should go there and you can have a rest.”

The door closed. Yibo decided to speak:

“Seung Yeon...”

The cover flew off his body and in the gloom of the room where there was just one table lamp on Seung Yeon hovered over him, gently touching his arm:

“Yibo, you’re awake? How are you feeling?”

“I think alright... what time is it?”

“Almost 11pm, there was a curfew signal. Move your limbs... is your head heavy?”

“A little...” he said, moving slightly, “Where is Xiao Zhan?”

“Fred knocked him off when he threw himself at Victor to distract him and then he took him home. He might be there.”

“We need to call him...”

“Yibo,” Seung Yeon looked at the guy confusedly, I can’t call him. No one can. His parents are there, get it? It’ll be too suspicious.”

It took Wang Yibo some effort to figure out what Seung Yeon wanted to tell him:
“What? No-no, I won’t leave without him... I won’t leave without him!”

“Yibo, listen!” Seung Yeon glanced back at the door, then leaned closer and whispered, “Xiao Zhan expected it would happen. He was ready for that. Now the most important thing is to get you out of here. You know what to do in the big world, you’ll be okay.”

“No, Seung Yeon, you don’t understand!” Yibo twitched but the abrupt movement echoed with pain in his ribs, “He himself is the living proof of what is happening here! And we promised each other!...”

“Yibo, hush!” Seung Yeon covered his mouth with a hand, “Hank is coming here any minute. Listen, no one can go for Xiao Zhan now without compromising themselves. It’s too dangerous. Xiao Zhan knows where and when he has to be. If he doesn’t appear in the garage at half past ten then you’ll have to get out of here without him, Yibo... the time is critical!”

Yibo wasn’t able to say anything – someone knocked on the door of the medical post again. The guy quickly stretched on the bunk and closed his eyes, Seung Yeon covered him with a blanket again and opened the door:

“Hello, Hank.”

The man came into the room, Yibo heard his voice:

“Like last time, yeah?”

“Wang Yibo became dangerous for John and for the whole community,” Seung Yeon replied coldly, “That was necessary. Do I have to remind you that you’d better keep quiet?”

“Course not,” chauffeur answered, “Where is a stretcher?”

He heard some fuss, then Yibo was caught by arms and legs and put on the solid stretcher.

“Jeez, I heard he’s breathing!” Hank slightly backed away and looked at Seung Yeon suspiciously.

“It’s the air coming out,” he clarified indifferently, “He’s in a deep coma now and won’t wake up. And you think too much, Hank, just take the handles and let’s go.”

The man didn’t dare argue with the doctor and, moreover, doubted his expertise. The man lifted the stretcher and carried Yibo to the garage. His hand slipped from the narrow boards and fell freely, and he couldn’t even help it. Seung Yeon was right – it’s more difficult to play a deadman than he’d thought.

Xiao Zhan shuddered and woke up to the curfew signal. His head buzzed, Fred had slapped his ears with all his might, after all. Having looked around, he surprisingly realized he was in his own room. Damn, the curfew signal! They were leaving in half an hour!

He clumsily got up from the bed, almost fell back, his head was dizzy and kept fizzing. The guy was so confused, looked around: maybe, he needed to take something with himself. Then he understood, he didn’t need to take anything with himself. For the twenty-six years in this place he didn’t get anything he wanted to take with himself to a new life... Fuck it!

Xiao Zhan left the room and started to clumsily go downstairs. Damn Fred, slapped too strongly... But his mother blocked his way:

“Zhan, you’re awake? Lord, I’m so happy! The laborer brought you here on the shoulder, I thought something disastrous happened...”

“That’s true, I did...” Xiao Zhan mumbled, trying to move his mother to the side, “They killed Yibo, mom... Weren’t you surprised they brought just me?”

His mother covered her mouth with a hand shortly, then quickly came back to her senses:

“What’s done is done, dear, I am sorry but... you’d better stay away.”

“Mam, get out of my way...”

“Where are you going? It’s 10pm now, it’s forbidden to go out.”

“I’m going to the medical post, to Seung Yeon, I’m sick...” he pushed her to the side, getting into the hall but the woman evaded and blocked the entrance door with her body:

“I know, you’re going to that boy! It’s over now, you told me to stay home, Zhan, you can’t help him anymore!”

“Mom, go away, I know! I know I can’t help him anyhow...” it was fearful to say out loud, emotions on Zhan’s face were genuine, “I’m sick, my head’s buzzing, Seung Yeon can help me...”

“Seung Yeon’s at home now and resting,” she said firmly, “Go back to yours, go to bed, you’ll go to him tomorrow...”

Xiao Zhan almost cried helplessly. Why didn’t she stay in her room and go out at the most inappropriate moment?!

“Mam, please, get out of my way!” he tried to tear the woman off the door.

“Where are you going?!” she was stubborn, clung to him as though she suspected something.

“To John,” he lied, “He promised me not to touch Yibo! I need to talk to him.”

“Don’t you dare argue with John again!” she gasped in righteous anger, “Please, son, stay home...”

“Go away, mam!” he barked and pushed her forcefully to the side. She lost her balance and fell. Xiao Zhan’s heart ached but he didn’t have time to neither mess with his mother nor feel guilty, “Sorry, mom. I’m coming back. Go to bed, please.”

Cho Seung Yeon and chauffeur Hank had already brought Yibo into the garage where there was a pickup ready to use. Having put the body off the stretchers, the men put it into the back of the car.

“Damn, he’s Asian but weighty,” Hank complained, rolling out tarpaulin to cover the back of the car with it, hiding the “dead body”, “Are you going with me, Seung Yeon?”

“I don’t know, should I...” Cho Seung Yeon wistfully bit lips. He actually tried to buy the time, hoping that Xiao Zhan would finally come. He was supposed to have a watch at work and the doctor looked at it, bringing his hand closer to the dim glow of the lightbulb, “Won’t you work well alone?”

“Actually, I can,” Hank replied, putting the tarpaulin and fixing it on the back, “I was really lucky last time to have you. When we got into an accident you were able to give me first aid, at least...”

Seung Yeon left the garage seemingly thoughtful, and suddenly bumped into Xiao Zhan. He was all ruffled with some wild eyes. Seung Yeon immediately brought the finger to his lips and nodded at the garage entrance, lip syncing:

“Hank.”

Xiao Zhan nodded and pressed himself against the wall, trying to find some kind of weapon for himself.

“I don’t know, Hank,” Seung Yeon said to chauffeur, getting back inside, “I don’t really wanna go anywhere... I’ve had a tough week, you know?”

“We’ve all had it tough,” the man mumbled with displeasure.

“Oh, look, what is it?” Seung Yeon leaned to one of the wheels, “Isn’t one of your tires flat?

“What?” the chauffeur asked incredulously, “It can’t be...”

He leaned over Seung Yeon’s head, and at that moment Xiao Zhan sneaked into the garage, holding a stone in his hand.

“There is a puncture right here, don’t you see?” Seung Yeon didn’t know what else to do and just talked sheer nonsense.

“No... wait, it’s too dark here...”

But at that moment Xiao Zhan swung an arm and hit the chauffeur's head with all force. The man swayed and then fell forward. Xiao Zhan’s eyes were mad:

“Fuck,” he sweared, “I hope I didn’t kill him.”

Seung Yeon immediately checked his pulse.

“You didn’t but it needs stitches and maybe there is a concussion... He needs first aid right now. Help me drag him to the side.”

They pulled the chauffeur Hank to the side, so that he wouldn’t hinder them, and then they heard fuss under the tarpaulin and Yibo’s voice:

“Damn, it’s stuffy in here... Let me out of here!”

“Now you have to handle me,” Seung Yeon told Zhan, “I’ll give a half an hour head start, then I’ll have to set the alarm...”

“Hey, what’s that, tarpaulin?” Yibo was indignant, “Zhan, take it off!”

“Wait, dear!” he responded, looking at Seung Yeon closely, “You’ll tell them I knocked Hank off, attacked you and stole Yibo’s body, won’t you?”

“That’s right,” he answered, taking something out of his pocket, “And more, that you took my seal and escaped with its help...”

He opened his seal and left an imprint on Xiao Zhan’s hand.

“Why?” he asked, “Sung Joo is there...”

“That’s alibi for Sung Joo, you, idiot, in case they’ll catch you,” the doctor chuckled and also took out a piece of paper from the pocket, “Take this too, These are approximate coordinates of where Jessica-Ann’s body was hidden.”

“Thank you, Seung Yeon...” Xiao Zhan said sincerely, “You... you are better than you think.”

The guy then grinned and then said:

“Okay, well, hit. Better the cheekbone, otherwise you’ll break my nose...”

“Damn, I’m not a professional or something...” Xiao Zhan took one step back from Seung Yeon, curling his right hand into a fist, “After everything we’ve been through, after your help and just hit... it’s... I dunno...”

“Stop bothering,” the guy roared. The doctor either didn’t think that was funny, “Shall I tell you something to raise your anger?”

“Hey, guy, what are you doing?” they heard from under the tarpaulin.

“Try,” Xiao Zhan chuckled.

“John told me you are boring and a crybaby,” Seung Yeon spit it into his face but the guy only laughed:

“Neither John’s words can touch my nerve...”

“I like Wang Yibo!” Seung Yeon suddenly shouted angrily, and a smile left Xiao Zhan’s face, “You heard, asshole? I like him. And I’m not doing it not for you or for universal justice but for him, you got it?”

Xiao Zhan and Cho Seung Yeon looked seriously at each other, not even blinking. Xiao Zhan’s fist curled now by itself. He heard from under the tarpaulin, quiet-surprised:

“Seung Yeon?...”

“And I kissed him,” the doctor said not without an inner satisfaction, “While you were fighting Victor. Yibo let me give him an injection, he trusted me fully, you know, and I kis...”

Xiao Zhan hit him with all his force, so that something cracked in his wrist. Seung Yeon was thrown to a wall of the garage but kept the balance, clinging to it, Yibo shouted from under the tarpaulin:

“What are you two doing there?! Let me out of here, now!”

For one more moment Seung Yeon and Xiao Zhan looked at each other and then the first one headed to the garage entrance without saying a word and opened it wide enough so that the pickup would move freely. Xiao Zhan traumatized his lip and it bleeded but the injury wasn’t deep.

“Fucking hell, Zhan, do you hear me or not?!” Yibo was outraged.

“Hush, dear, lie still, we’re leaving,” he commanded and got in the salon, slamming the door. It was good for Xiao Zhan to be at the steering wheel again and he, with a great pleasure and inner anticipation, he backed and then went outside, turning. Seung Yeon and him looked at each other last time: friends and eternal rivals... it lasted to the very end. But the last words Zhan told Seung Yeon were still:

“Thank you.”

Chapter Text

They quietly crossed the ranch, stopped at the main gates where Sung Joo was on watch that night, having changed his shifts beforehand. That moment Yixuan and him ran to them, to open the gates.

“Where’s Yibo?” Yixuan asked, for that Xiao Zhan quickly left the car and took off the tarpaulin off the back of the pickup.

“I’m here,” he heard a displeased mumbling and then saw a ruffled head of the guy, “I almost choked.”

Then to Xiao Zhan, firmly:

“What was that?”

“Speak more quietly, dear,” he said coldly, “We’re running outta time, just half an hour. Seung Yeon said that then he would give the alarm.”

“Then let’s say goodbye quickly,” Sung Joo smiled, stretching an arm to Yibo and Zhan to give a handshake. Just like there, beyond the perimeter, “If you escape, guy, kick John’s ass.”

“And take it with you,” Yixuan shoved a thick folder with a small SD card into Yibo’s hands.

“You made it!” Yibo was amazed, “Guys...” he suddenly got sentimental, “you’ll have problems...”

“We know that,” Sung Joo said, “I’m ready.”

“I’ll have the least problems,” Yixuan replied, “But I’ll help Sung Joo and Seung Yeon as much as I can.”

They all four shaked each other’s hands, hugged, then Yibo took the passenger seat and Xiao Zhan got back to the driver’s and they left into the perimeter.
They didn’t have anything: neither money nor documents, just them, evidence for John Cole and the community, and also friends’ support.

After that Yixuan quietly got back to his place, sneaked into his wing through the back door, Sung Joo, as if nothing had happened, got back to the tower and kept his watch. Seung Yeon, as he promised, gave the alarm signal in several minutes. The group of pursuers left for them immediately. He himself got the second car ready and took chauffeur Hank to Las Cruces, to the hospital.

Xiao Zhan and Yibo drove silently at the beginning, the the latter didn’t restrain:
“What was that, Zhan?” and clarified after a short pause, “Did you fight with Seung Yeon?”

“I had to hit him so that he would have alibi,” he replied shortly.

“You hit him after he’d said he liked me...”

“I hit him after he told me he’d kissed you, taking advantage of your weakness,” Zhan’s voice was firm and resolute in his rightness.

“Why didn’t you let me say goodbye to him?” Wang Yibo turned head and looked at Xiao Zhan’s profile closely, “Because of jealousy?”

The guy dramatically chuckled and blurted:

“And you wouldn’t leave without that, would you?”

Wang Yibo felt as anger and displeasure boiled within him but managed to hold back the negative emotions and then just said quietly:

“No, Zhan. Don’t do that. Now you are looking like... your own mother.”

Xiao Zhan’s leg twitched, the car shuddered but he handled it and they went on their journey without a stop, otherwise the guy was depressingly quiet. Wang Yibo stopped glaring at him and turned away.

It was dark and quiet around, just the light of the headlights split the darkness in front of them. It was easy to get lost in the desert, especially until you reached the road, but not unless you’d used it for years before. Xiao Zhan had enough driver experience and took them to the agreed with Fred place without any problem, though he tried to drive not fast so that Yibo wouldn’t shake on the bumps. That was a bus stop in the middle of the desert – the only notable point where they could meet. Three months ago Wang Yibo had left the bus at this stop and went to the ranch El Rescate with only his backpack to pursue a guy of his dreams. The whole lifetime had passed since that moment. There was no one on the bus stop but them. Xiao Zhan stopped the pickup and turned off the engine.

“What’s the time?” Yibo asked nervously, “Fred said they’d wait for us here at 11pm.”

“They usually have watches in the cars, wait,” Zhan leaned over the guy’s laps, opened the glove compartment and rummaged through it, “Aha, here, look.”
He fished out the dial of the watch and handed it to Yibo: it showed five minutes to 11pm.

“We’re even early,” he said, “Hm, well, okay.”

They both fell silent again, looking in the dark of the desert. Then Yibo couldn’t sit still anymore, unfastened the belt, carefully got out of the car and went along the bus stop back and forth. Nothing changed in five minutes. The desert was dark and quiet.

“Damn, is this watch right? Probably we are late?” Yibo grew more nervous.

“We have no other watch, after all,” Xiao Zhan said. He didn’t leave the car and was even visibly calm, “What are we doing if nobody’s coming?”

“We’re going to my parents,” Yibo said with uncertainty, “my father works at the military range, after all, maybe he can protect... us. Or we are going to the north.”

“We still can't go far,” Xiao Zhan said kind of indifferently, “There’s not much gas in the car and we don’t have documents... that’s just right to the nearest traffic patrol post.”

“No, they’ll come,” Yibo said stubbornly, convincing Zhan and himself, “Fred said that people from the cartel would be waiting for us at the bus stop nearest to the ranch. They’ll come, damn... they will.”

Xiao Zhan was depressingly quiet. No one of them wanted to even think what would happen if Fred’s words were a lie, what would happen if all that was just a multilayered trap where John just wanted to check his circle’s loyalty. And they all didn’t pass the check, all of them. No one of them wanted to think what would happen if they were caught and violently brought back to the community. It would barely be a life since then. Not even an existence. And they’d probably just be killed. Wang Yibo, for sure.

They heard some rumble in the distance, and Xiao Zhan lifted eyes on Yibo. That was a car. The sound of the car reaching them from the side of Anthony, and their hearts twitched happily. Xiao Zhan got out of the car quickly and they both peered into the dark. But at the same time they heard a sound of the car from the side of the ranch, the guys exchanged nervous looks:

“What? A chase? Already?” Wang Yibo panicked, “Why so fast?”

They saw headlights from the side of the town. The car was really approaching them. And from the ranch there was another car. At that moment a suspicion waved in the guys' hearts that the car from Anthony wasn’t really to save them and not just a casual night driver. But who would reach them faster?

“Let’s drive towards them!” Yibo offered foolishly though they both understood they had to stay at the place. They saw headlights from the side of the ranch, “Fuck, turn off the headlights!”

Xiao Zhan dashed to the pickup and did it but their car had already been seen by both sides. And suddenly an echo waved through the desert from the speaker, just like in the police movies:

“Xiao Zhan, stay at your place!”

The guy gasped from the coming panic. That was a real chase from the ranch, maybe they thought Xiao Zhan was mad because he’d stolen Yibo’s body and left with a corpse of his beloved so that they were talking just to him.

“Take the folder and we’ll run towards them!” Yibo shouted and went with fast steps along the road towards the car of Cartel Sinaloa. Every step echoed with a flash of pain in his chest, he grimaced and bit his lips to blood but ran as fast as he could. Xiao Zhan took the folder and the SD card from the dashboard and reached him in three jumps, slightly pushing him by the elbow:

“Go, Yibo, go...”

“Xiao Zhan, don’t be stupid, stay where you are! It’s us – your family, Xiao Zhan! Your father is here!”

The cartel car, a huge tall off-road car, stopped in front of them and a man looked out of the window at the driver’s seat. In a light blinding headlights they could see just the silhouette but Yibo recognized him by the voice:

“Yibo, baby, is that you? Heavenly Mother, is someone chasing you?”

“Pablo!” Yibo shouted, suddenly feeling unprecedented relief and a powerful wave of adrenaline, “Help us! Zhan, is’t Pablo, it’s Pablo!”

He had never ever been so happy to see his boss before. Yibo quickened his step, despite the pain, Xiao Zhan kept him on his back. Pablo dashed at them again, driving up closer:

“Lads, jump in, on the backseat! Now!”

“Xiao Zhan, we demand you stop!” thundered behind them, “If you’re coming back to the ranch voluntarily, John is promising you’ll be alright. He’s promising to bury Yibo in the community!”

In the light of the approaching headlights of the ranch’s off-road car probably, the chasers sectants from the ranch didn’t see clearly. They could see just the car and moving silhouettes. What were they thinking? That Xiao Zhan was running from them with a corpse or that Yibo’s body was left in the abandoned pickup?

“I don’t believe his promises!” Xiao Zhan cried hysterically, opening the door of the off-road.

When they heard a boom and a whistle they didn’t understand what that was and that scared the shit out of them. Yibo got into the salon almost on his fours, Xiao Zhan dived in after him, they piled on each other, and the whistles and booms went on, Pablo sweared:

“For fucks sake, dear Lord, they’re shooting us!” he pulled the clutch and the car almost jumped like an ardent horse, whistle-boom, the car turned, “Sam, fuck, do something!”

Only now Yibo saw that Old Sam was sitting on the front seat, unfazed and gloomy, as usual:

“One moment,” he replied and fished out from the compartment... a real shotgun! Then spit out of the window and roared for some reason, “ Fucking wahabites!”

Pablo pushed the gas pedal with all his force and the car rushed from the place with a wild roar, whistle-boom, Old Sam wriggled, leaned out of the window to the waist and shot in return.

“Are they firing at us?” Xiao Zhan whispered with his eyes wide outta fear. And Yibo understood what he was talking about: that for him, Wang Yibo, those were just the chasers from the ranch he’d lived among for three months. But they were a family for Xiao Zhan, the only close people, his father was there, damn...
Whistle-boom, the car wriggled, Pablo roared at them:

“Keep your heads down! Pressed yourself at the bottom. It’s going to be fun.”
Sam shot once again and sneaked back into the car, to reload the gun.

“Hey, Yibo, how are you, my boy?” his boss from the hardware store asked him fatherly-like as if nothing was happening. “Did you wait long?”

“Does it mean Sam received my dog tag?” he asked back, pressing Xiao Zhan against himself. He was almost lying on him.

“Of course, I did!” he grunted. Whistle-boom, a bullet grazed the bumper, the car wriggled again, “Fucking cultists... Ah, sure! That chinese boy, your flatmate, came by to the store and started mumbling something that he’d met you in Anthony, that you’d been really strange, and something about some series and a code word, Sam and I didn’t get anything, really, until he took out the dog tag...”
“So he understood everything after all! He did!” Wang Yibo beamed with a smile though they were still being chased. Sam wriggled again and looked out of the window.

“Then Sam told me the truth,” Pablo went on. He drove the car confidently and quickly, they were moving to the town, “Oh, how did I shout at him! You are a brainless kid, Yibo, how could he let you get into such a mess?”

Sam shot and the sound was different this time, a clap. The man noted with pleasure:

“Hit.”

Xiao Zhan jerked nervously and lifted his head, looking at the rear window. There was no blow after, however the chasers finally stopped and fell far behind. Very soon two fugitives were so far for the bullet to hit them, the black off-road car dissolved fully in the dark.

“It seems, we made it, guys, you can sit straight,” Pablo seemed to be really having fun with the situation.

Xiao Zhan lifted carefully from Wang Yibo, sat and helped him to sit. Yibo’s chest got painful though he hadn’t remembered about it because of adrenaline just a minute ago.

“Pablo, Sam...” Wang Yibo didn’t know how to thank them. He didn’t expect his ex-employer and his ex-colleague to be such brave, non-indifferent, and, more important, real friends, “Thank you...”

“Come on, boy,” Pablo grunted, not without pleasure, “you’re like a son to me. Oh, I remember that in the year eighty-nine...”

“No problem,” Sam interrupted him, answering Yibo, and the employer didn’t go on.

“Xiao Zhan,” Yibo realized, “these are Pablo and Sam, my employer and my colleague from ex-work, from the store, do you remember them?”

The guy, still inhibited, nodded.

“Hey, Pablo, I didn’t know you’re related to the cartel Sinaloa!” Yibo filled the formed silence.

“Me?!” the man was genuinely surprised, “For heaven’s sake, baby, I’m an honest man and a businessman! That’s Mrs. Cruz!”

“Mrs. Cruz?!” the guy startled.

“Sure! She’s the daughter of one of Sinaloa's bosses, you know?”

“Of course I don’t!” Yibo’s jaw dropped.

“Sure! She and I got married against her father’s will, then hid for several years and only then her father accepted me, well. Alright, when she learned you were in danger we took action immediately, pulled the strings... The plan was arranged quickly, the hardest part was to break through to your liaison in the community.”

“To Fred?”

“I don’t know his name, I’ve not even talked to him” Pablo told calmly, “I just know he’s from Sinaloa and had been infiltrated into the community a couple of years ago. We contacted him through the supplies. Every time they made large purchases in our store I sent some message to him. Wrapped it into a lump of scotch tape or a bubble wrap and left it in the corner of the car, like some trash. I don’t know what was after that but when the car came back there was no trash in it anymore. It wasn’t difficult for me but for that Sinaloa organizes the protection for us and never noses into our business.”

“And after that, probably, the man found the message since he took part in unloading trucks all the time,” Yibo dragged wistfully, but Pablo’s hissing interrupted his thoughts:

“Fuck you, morons...”

He lifted his head and saw in front of them, right at the town entrance, there was a police post on the road with a blocking barrier.

“I haven’t seen it here before,” Sam cut off gloomily.

“That’s them!” Xiao Zhan twitched, coming back to his senses, “I think they called the local police and got a tip. I’m sure they’ll turn us to John if we stop!”

His eyes filled with horror again, he clung to the front sit and looked ahead tensely. Pablo and Sam looked at each other, and the latter fastened his seatbelt again.

“Okay, bastards...” Pablo gritted his teeth and suddenly backed away, driving about hundred meters back, “You forced me into it yourself...”

The man turned back to the scared Xiao Zhan and tense Yibo:

“Hold tight, guys,” and here he chuckled, “by the way, Yibo, your favorite band released a new song. Do you wanna listen?”

And the man, not waiting for the reply, turned on the song in the car, spinning the wheel to almost the highest volume and then shouted desperately-happily, shaking his head, and switching the clutch and pushing the gas pedal. The car gained speed, they rushed right into the barrier and all blockers, obviously not willing to stop.

“Fuck...” Yibo sighed out, clinging to the handler above the door.

“Oh, Lord...” Zhan sighed out, repeating the action after him.

At the moment of collision both guys shut their eyes. The car tore the heck down the barrier and row of some barrels that, probably, had been out there in a rush, all that was accompanied with a horrible clang and rattle, thunder, the side window near Yibo cracked, because it was hit by one of the barrels, not to mention the front window that was held by God know what now, the car wriggled its back, it almost swiveled but Pablo spinned the steering wheel with all his force and they rushed forward by the deafening song cutting through the night.

To Yibo’s surprise, police didn’t go for them with patrol lights, so, that all wasn’t really official, as Zhan’s supposed, though that was probably a question of time.
“Where are we going?” Yibo asked when he was sure everyone was alive.

“To the place where I’m handing you to another reliable person,” Pablo answered firmly, “and from there you are going across several states to Chicago.”

“Chicago?” Wang Yibo’s heart jerked, and he felt familiar warmth in his chest, “Why can’t we just go there like passengers on the backseat, like hitchhikers? There's a low chance someone's ask for our documents. Why should we go there illegally? “

“Because we suspect cartel Juarez has people not only in New Mexico but in Texas, so it’s better for you to fully fall off radar and keep your lie low,“ Pablo explained, “And also it’s dangerous to appear near Sinaloa’s people too – then John would understand how you’d managed to escape and your liaison would have some hard time. So if you wanna be as far from the ranch as possible then you’ll have to be patient. Do you have a plan at all?”

“Yes,” said the guy firmly, “Xiao Zhan and I are going to the federals. We have not only our words but evidence too. I want to stir up this hornet’s nest.”

“Oh, that’s gonna be a huge case,” Pablo shaked his head, “Are you ready for the consequences, baby?”

“We are ready,” Xiao Zhan said instead. And even though he spoke about something he couldn’t understand fully, his dark determination had a convincing effect on the man.

In a couple of minutes they reached some industrial area that looked more like a warehouse: there were garages, rows of containers and trucks here and there. The facility didn’t sleep even at night: Mexican guest workers were loading something, the cargo lift worked, people worked here and there and rushed back and forth.

Pablo stopped at the row of long-range trucks:

“Get out. We have arrived.”

All four left the off-road. A lot of lights lit the area, there was even a twenty-four hour gas station working. Some Mexican came up to Pablo and they shook hands, smiled, and spoke fluently in Spanish. Sam stood, leaning on the crashed car hood, crossing arms on his chest, Yibo and Zhan stood near, looking around, and Zhan also permanently pressed the folder to himself. An SD card was kept in his pocket together with Seung Yeon’s note.

Pablo was explaining something to the Mexican stranger: pointed at Yibo and Xiao Zhan, at the crashed car. Yibo heard some words like “ranch El Rescate”, “cartel Juarez”, “John Cole”, “Sinaloa”, “Chicago”.

While they were talking, Wang Yibo came up to Old Sam and thanked him especially once again:

“Thank you for the dog tag. Without it... I dunno how we would have managed to get outta there.”

“As for it,” Sam hooked the chain on his neck with his fingers and took it off, just like the first time, and put it on Yibo again, “it’s better you have it. Then I’d feel better.”

Wang Yibo felt as if he got back his lucky charm. He felt warmth running through his body and smiled, touched, and hugged Sam carefully, trying not to cause any other flash of pain in his chest, patting his back.

“They’ve beaten you up well,” the man nodded at the recovering bruises on Yibo’s face, “It seems we appeared right on time.”

“You can even imagine how right,” he answered quietly.

Xiao Zhan stood near and was modestly quiet. Pablo approached them:

“I’ve told Guillermo everything, he’s also from Sinaloa, you’ll leave with him. They are taking sweet peppers across the border, well, you understand. All dog raids are done so you’ll run across the states with the breeze, you’ll be in Chicago in a day and a half. Their truck convoy is leaving in fifteen minutes so it’s better if you ate before,” Pablo sneaked into the back of the car and fished out the food container in a plastic bag, “Mrs. Cruz made tacos for you, Yibo, she remembers it’s your favorite.”

“Oh, tacos from Mrs. Cruz!” the guy changed fully. His mouth watered and his stomach growled insistently, “Xiao Zhan, try it, it’s really yummy!”

There were four portions in the container and Yibo took one, immediately biting almost half of it. Oh, Lord. That was so wonderful, he even rolled his eyes, hearing a surprised Xiao Zhan, exclaiming near him:

“It’s really delicious!”

“Eat, guys, eat. The convoys won’t stop often so it’s not clear when you’re eating next time. By the way, Yibo, here is the address of our man in Chicago,” Pablo took out a note from his wallet and shoved it into the guy’s pants pocket, “You can stay at him when you reach it. And here’s some cash for you for the first time,” he first wanted to take out the money from his wallet but then fished out the photo of his family and, having hidden it into his pocket, he handed the wallted with all his cash to Yibo, “Call me, when you settle down. And, you know, don’t disappear anymore, okay?”

“Okay,” Yibo answered, smiling, but then realized, “By the way, where are we? That’s not Anthony, right?”

“We are in Chaparral,” Pablo answered, “truckers have a base and a big truck stop here after crossing the border/ So we scheduled the escaping right on Friday so that the guys would manage to catch you.”

“In Chaparral?..” Yibo froze and looked melancholically at the horizon.

“You parents live here, don’t they?” Xiao Zhan asked understandingly.

“I’ve not called my mom since that day when...” he didn’t finish because he didn’t really have to. Xiao Zhan understood him clearly. Since that day when John found him in the rehearsal house.

“Mrs. Wang called me a couple of weeks ago,” Pablo confessed, “She said you’d disappeared. I already knew where you were and we were preparing the rescue plan, so I decided not to tell her anything, sorry, Yibo. I thought it wasn’t the right time for her to find out. What nonsense did you tell here about the expedition?”

“Yeah, I told her I was in Antarctica, helping to save penguins from the oil spill,” he said sadly.

Pablo and Sam chuckled and the first clarified:

“Do you get it that you can see them now? If John Cole managed to block the road at the town entrance then he definitely told someone to look after your parents’ house.”

Yibo nodded understandingly.

“I do. It’s a high chance he did. They might think Zhan is taking my body to them right now... But, probably, I have some time to call mom?” he looked at Pablo imploringly.

“She knows my number,” the man said confusedly, “I think it’ll be strange if her son who's supposed to be in Antarctica will call her from the boss’s phone...”

“She doesn’t know mine,” Sam suddenly said and handed him his old push-button phone, “Call. Do you remember her number?”

His mother’s number was the one he learned by heart, really, so, being a little nervous, he dialed her, slightly moving away from the men to the side.

After three tones the woman picked up the phone, asking carefully:

“Yeah, who’s that?”

Of course, it was just before midnight that someone was calling her from an unknown number…

“Mom, it’s me,” Yibo answered and felt a lump in his throat.

She cried immediately.

“Lord, thank God! Thank god, you’re alive! Baobao, where are you?! Are you okay? Why didn’t you call?! What happened?!”

“Mom, mom, hush, it’s alright...” he pressed the phone against his ear and felt so helpless, “Sorry, mom, I broke my phone... And I wasn’t able to reach the mainland and we had... problems... weather conditions, you know?”

“No, I don’t know anything! I don’t understand!” it seemed she was getting hysterical, “Where are you now?”

“I’m in the US, mom, I’m back, don’t worry. I’m alright, I’m safe and sound, sorry, for real, I really worry about you too...”

“Lord, thank God, thank God... Where are you exactly? I’m coming.”

“No, mom, don’t come yet, I... uhh... I’m still busy at work, I’ll be busy, okay...” Pablo showed him crossed arms and pointed at his watch, Yibo nodded, “Mom, I can’t talk anymore, I’m calling you in two days, I promise.”

“Yibo, wait! Explain to me normally what happened to you...”

“Mom, I will, I’ll tell you everything, I promise, but later. In two days, okay? I love you, mom, but I have to go. Sorry that I made you worried I didn’t want that...”

“I love you too, baobao, and dad, he worries too...”

“Hug him for me, okay, mom, that’s all, bye,” and he hung up until she started crying again though his own eyes were moist.

A hand lay on his shoulder from behind, Xiao Zhan semi-hugged him in a silent support, and Yibo kissed his hands as a thank you.

“Lads, you have to go,” Pablo called them, “The convoy is leaving.”

Wang Yibo returned the phone to Sam with appreciation, then the men hugged him in turns, shaked hands with Xiao Zhan and handed them under Guillermo’s patronage.

“You’ll go lying, that’s a plus,” the trucker started giving the brief instructions, “but it’s dead stuffy in there so get ready, the journey will be not a pleasant one. However, lie silently like little mice, especially at the stops, I’ll tell you when you can go out and pee. Here, take some water with you,” he threw a bottle for them, meant for two, half a liter mineral water, “Be ready to stay patient because the next stop is only in Santa-Rosa. It's a seven hour journey. You get it?”

Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan exchanged glances. Of course, they got got, and didn’t have any questions, and choice either. A bunch of people risked their lives for them to get this opportunity to get into a truck, filled with sweet people, and spend two of the most horrible days in their lives in stuffiness and tightness.

“Well, if that’s clear, get in,” and Guillermo opened the truck’s doors for them, helping to get inside, “There’s a crack there, you see? Get in there, it’s a cavity, there’s a mattress inside.”

The guy got inside with difficulty and sneaked through the crack between boxes with sweet pepper. There really was a mattress inside, meant for two, and they clumsily arranged themselves there, hearing as the door locked from the outside, dipping the guys in complete darkness.

Chapter Text

They were lying in the niche, tightly pressed against each other, and Xiao Zhan, moreover, hit the front boxes with his feet. Sweet pepper surrounded them from everywhere, fillin the stuffy air with sweet-herbal aroma.

“It’s so stuffy in here,” Zhan mentioned when they’d finally lay down, putting the folder somewhere under his knees. It was so uncomfortable to lie in such tightness and, more, in the comeplete dark. The truck shuddered and slightly moved, “We’ve gotten out, Yibo, we made it,” Zhan whispered.

“I’m sighing out only when John’s behind bars,” Yibo replied.

“Relax now, just a little,” Zhan reccomended, “Let’s try fall asleep, then the time will pass faster.”

Wang Yibo thought he wouldn’t be able to fall asleep because of the all stress he’d been through, stuffiness and pain in his troubled chest that only grew. But the firmly formed regime of the day finally won and he dozed. Zhan, probably, fell asleep too.

They both woke up because the truck stopped. The guys listened carefully: the door of the truck opened and they felt blessed fresh air throught the gap but they both kept in mind they had to stay still, so they didn’t even move.

They heard voices froom the street:

“What are you delivering?”

“Sweet peppers, boss, here, look,” Guillermo told someone.

They could see jumping lightl of the torch through the nap. Wang Yibo felt as Xiao Zhan founf his hand in the dark and tried to squeeze it back harder: it’s going to be alright.

The light of the torch disappeared, doors of the truck closed and in several minutes the convoy started again, and Xiao Zhan exhaled with relief.

“You scared?” Yibo asked in the darkness.

“A little,” Xiao Zhan admitted after a pause, “Do you think we are the only illegal cargo they’re carrying?”

“Not sure,” he said.

They couldn’t fall asleep again. At first the guys tried to talk: made plans, what they were going to do when they were in Chicago, then they catastrofically lacked air and it became difficult to speak. They fell silent, breathing heavily. Wang Yibo soaked in sweat, he was so hot, it seemed to him Xiao Zhan near him was almost fiery.

Then he wanted to pee. They slowly sipped the bottle of water Guillermo’d given them before depature, but it finished quickly. Their lips dried out, they wanted to drink and their bladders ached, moreover, pain blossomed more and more in Yibo’s chest as if it took revenge on him for all those hours he’d not remembered about it because of adrenaline.

The worst was that they lost track of time. How long had they been on way? Two hours, three, five or just twenty minutes? It all was wiped out, they had only heat, thirst, stuffiness, darkness, tightness, pain and sharp desire to urinate.
At some moment Yibo couldn’t bear that anymore and started to moan a little out of pulsating hits in his chest and Xiao Zhan didn’t know how to help him.

“Yibo, please, just hold it,” he asked pitifully, squeezing his hand, “It’s gonna be alright... We’re taking a stop and I’ll ask someone for a painkiller, I promise...”

“Tell me something, Xiao Zhan,” he asked weakly. He needed a distraction, any one.

Xiao Zhan was silent, probably, collecting his thoughts, and then offered:

“Do you want me to tell you what house we’re gonna have? How I imagine it?”

“Yeah...” he responded weakly.

“I don’t know why but I imagine it in gently baby-blue and white hues,” Xiao Zhan started slowly, “One bedroom, a living room, a kitchen... and a lot of windows and light. I’d like to choose everything, from the rag at the door to the furniture and wallpapers. Your whishes will be taken into account, sure, don’t worry. I just imagine this joy... And a cat and a dog, Yibo, we’re taking them from shelter, deinitely, okay? And I’d like to have a piano in the corner so that I could play sometimes. And every weekend I’d cook some new dish, cuisines of different countries, and we’d sleep together late at the weeknends, till 9am, and I’d learn how to make coffee – I’d make it for you...”

Wang Yibo listened to him and thought that Xiao Zhan’s dreams were really modest and limited his poor knowledge of a family life he’d learned in the community and by the fragments he’d seen in old films and rare journeys beyond the perimeter. He wanted to tell his beloved that their house could be much more interesting than just white-blue, that there were trillions of interior designs for differents tasted, just pay money for them, that he didn’t need to learn how to cook different dishes because if they want to try them there was a ever-present delivery on standby... He was silent and listen without interrupting, because it was important to let Xiao Zhan dream, because pain and stuffiness made him weak and because it seemed he was drowning.

Xiao Zhan alerted when Yibo stopped moanin and fell silent.

“Yibo, how are you?’’ silence, “Yibo, do you hear me?”

Xiao Zhan felt he was breathing and, eventually, he said:

“I do... Zhan...” he was talking with huge difficulty, taking a short inhale every time, that scorched his throat, “If I’m not making it thr...”

“Yibo, stop that!”

“No, listen, still... go to federals, Zhan, not to police but to FBI. Don’t fear, the worst already happened to you, happened there... you’ll do it, you’ll make it and don’t... don’t doubt yourself...”

“Stop it now,” Xiao Zhan’s voice twitched, he found Yibo’s hand again, it was all covered with sweat, “don’t say anything, breath, just breath...”

Wang Yibo sighed and closed his eyes though it didn’t really make difference in such darkness if he took them open or closed. Then Xiao Zhan said:

“Sorry I didn’t let you say goodbye to Seung Yeon.”

Wang Yibo opened eyes in surprise and turned face to Xiao Zhan even though he didn’t see him and just felt. He didn’t expect Zhan to start talking about it.

“You’re right, I was jealous. I wasn’t right,” he finished.

“Wow...” Wang Yibo was confused out of surprise, “Well, apology accepted.”

After several minutes of silence Xiao Zhan finally added:

“I don’t want to be like my mother.”

They both fell silent again for some time. Chest pulsated in Yibo’s chest, he was afraid to even breath because with that the pressure on the bladder grew too. Oh my God, dear Lord, God Almighty... if only he wouldn’t urinare right here on the bunk. If he was alone here, Wang Yibo would probably neglect his own comfort but Xiao Zhan was going to suffer, not to mention the smell and the rest, God, Zhan didn’t deserve that, he needed to hold it…

“Xiao Zhan...” he finally asked with a serious voice, “I need to know... Will you love me if I’m urinate myself and soak you too? I understand if we are breaking up after that...”

Xiao Zhan chuckled and wriggled:

“Wait, we have an empty bottle...”

“Damn, right...”

“Let me hold it...”

“Hell, it won’t be neat anyway...”

“This is not catastrophic, go, take it out,” he unscrew a lid of the empty bottle of water, “And no, Yibo, I’m not stoppin to love you even if you urinate yourself and won’t ever break up with you after such little thing.”

But here the truck breaked smoothly and stopped. The guys froze and alerted, listening. In a minute the door of the truck opened again, they felt fresh air and Guillermo’s voice announced:

“Get out, lads! A stop!”

“Oh, God, yeah!” Yibo blurted, he was about to undo his zip, “God does exist, Zhan... Uhg... help me get out.”

Xiao Zhan got up clumsily, help Yibo get on his feet, they both reached the gap by feel and went out to the light.

There was an early morning outside. Guillermo helped Yibo ge down, he then went to the side and smoked with pleasure. They were at some gas station in the middle of the road, there were some outskirts on one side, and law shrub on the other.

“I’m taking a leak,” Yibo said quickly and limped, groaning, into the thorny bushes.

“Where are we?” Xiao Zhan asked, squinting from the morning sun.

“Santa Rosa, state of New Mexico,” Guillermo dramatically pointed all around as if spoke for itself, “A city of multiple man-made lakes. But alas, we have only ten-minute stop, so we won’t see them.”

“Wang Yibo needs medicine,” Xiao Zhan said, “painkillers. And we need water. And food. And... light. Or some torch at least. It’s... unbearable inside.”

“Can imagine,” Guillermo answered, droppin the cigarette to his feet and smashing it against the asphalt, “Go to the third car, there’s Antonio there, he has the biggest first aid kit, maybe he’ll give you something. Guy’s are bying water now at the gas station but with food you’ll have to wait till Amarillo. There’s nothing appropriate sold at this station, just some chips and chocolates – you’ll get even thristier then now. And about the light... wait...” he sneaked into his cab and fished out a little push-button flashlight and handed it to Zhan, “Here, get it, but be careful and turn it off when there’s checking.”

“Of course,” Xiao Zhan took flashlight to returning Yibo and then himself ran to the third truck. He got Yibo some pills, dashed to the bushed to pee and then they came back into the suffiness of their hole, the convoy started.

There were four hours till the next stop.

After such a needed stop where they’d managed to relieve themselves, drink enough and, moreover, Yibo took medicine, the guys managed to fall asleep again – and they slept throught the way to Amarillo though it broke their whole regime. But they didn’t really care about regime anymore.

When then convoy stopped again already in Texas, the guys woke up, feeling badly hungry. Thank god, this time there was a little caffe at the gas stations this time, where the guys headed, having promised Guillermo not to stay there for too long.

It was just before noon when cashier-waiter lazily waved away the flies, looking at them coldly, chewing her gum, she wasn’t interested at all what these too worn out Asians, one of whom was clearly beaten, were doing in her place, in Amarillo, the state of Texas. She just said:

“Well, what are you looking at? Are you ordering anything?”

There were several suspicious hamburgers wrapped in film on display (and Yibo doubted that refrigeration worked in there), couple bowls of some faded salad and some fish with a handful of French fries. They really wanted to eat but to make the rest of their way to Chicago, throwing up on the sweet peppers from Mexico wasn’t appealing.

“And do you have any soup?” Xiao Zhan asked politely.

“Chicked broth and noodles.”

“Perfect,” he smiled at her so politely as if they were in “le Bernardin” in New York, “Two portions, please.”

She snorted with displeasure for some reason but poured them two portions of soup:

“That’ll be eight bucks.”

Wang Yibo paid with Pablo’s money, they got two bowls on the tray and plastic spoons, and Xiao Zhan whispered to Yibo, stepping away:

“Eights dollars for two portions of broth is so expensive!”

Yibo chuckled:

“You’re just not used to the prices. That’s not expensive, Zhan. Eat.”

Now they had to have six hours journey till the next step in Oklahoma City and the guys took a very smart approach this time: first, they took more water, and finally risked to bye two hot dogs, having finished them in literally couple of minutes, Xiao Zhan also took two packages of wet wipes for some reason – ans they both again got into their hole, putting the bottles into the corners and onto the sides.

They played associations and word chain, were silent, Zhan sang, then they discussed again what awaited them when they get to Chicago and almost had an argument. Not during the discussion but when Zhan suddenly asked:

“Did you like Seung Yeon?”

Wang Yibo groaned and asked instead of answering:

“Why are you doing it, Zhan?”

The guy winced, Yibo saw that because they’d turned on the flashlight, directing the light to the upper boxes.

“Not because I want to argue,” he said quietly but Yibo let the ironie be heard in his voice:

“Really?”

“I just feel it, that’s why I’m asking,” Zhan’s face fell, he mumbled quietly and didn’t look at Yibo, “You know, I was never jealous before you... Is it... Is it bad?”

Yibo sighed: he either had no idea if it was bad or not. Of course, he was jealous of Zhan and John, too, but that was different situation: Yibo knew from the beginning that Zhan hated his molester, that he suffered near him. He didn’t know what his reaction could be if he saved even a bit of his teenage feelings to John. And Wang Yibo was sure he was the only one Xiao Zhan loved, the one who he looked at. It made him sure of their relationships but Xiao Zhan, just so happened, didn’t have such confidence.

“It’s not that bad itself,” the guy tried to formulate his own thoughts, “The whole point is what you do with your feelings, I think, that’s it. You can be fooolishly jealous, for example, argue with me, break the plates, suffer but that’s stupid, if you ask me. It only destroys, there’s nothing good about it.”

“Can it be different?” he asked quietly.

“I dunno, maybe, it can...” Yibo took a pause, “I have never really been jealous in my life... But I wouldn’t mind if arguments were replaces with a blow job.”

“You!” Xiao slapped Yibo’s thighs, the guy laughed despite the stinging pain in hus chest, and then dramatically moaned:

“You killed me, killed, that’s all!”

Xiao Zhan suddenly wriggled, turning on his side to Yibo with difficulty, pressed his hand against to the boxes on another side and, carefuly leaning to Yibo, so that not to weigh on him, touched his recovering lips with his own.

Xiao Zhan’s lips were soft, dry and hot, and Yibo froze under him, realizing suddenly that they hadn’t kissed for a long time. Very long time, several nights after that exact night... They both pecked each other, showing care and confessing love, but they didn’t really kiss and Yibo suddenly melted, leaning back to him.

Their tongues met and gently touched each other, Xiao Zhan shifted his weight on a bent arm, buried his face somewhere under Yibo’s ear and his free hand slid down the guy’s stomach, to hic crotch, caressed the hardening cock, letting the shuddered moan from his beloved.

“Zhan, why... Oh, God...”

“I love you,” Zhan whispered into his ear, quietly and scorchingly, and his hand kept strocking Yibo’s crotch throught the pants, “I missed you so much...”

“So did I,” Yibo confessd, trying to find Zhan’s fly with his hand but he wasn’t able to do it from his position, “I missed your... touches.”

Xiao Zhan gently kissed Yibo behind the ear, his earlobe and along his slightly prickly bristles, and his hand worked professionaly, expertly. Finally, Yibo’s cock was fully hard and asked to let it out, the guy whined, wriggled under his hand:
“Zhan, undo your pants... Do you need help?”

The hummed into his cheek, left the hand lie calmly on his crotch, warming it, and said slyly, smiling:

“And now let’s have a talk, Wang Yibo.”

“Uh, you bitch...” he dragged, realizing his defeat, and laughed. Xiao Zhan giggled with a huge pleasure, “Xiao Zhan, you’re a fearful person...”

“Well?” he smiled, “I am jealous of you, just like you wanted. I can’t you a blow job in such circumstances, apologies.”

“I hate you...”

“I thought you loved me.”

“That’s true too but not at this moment, God... Aren’t you leaving me like that, are you?”

“Tell me you don’t care about Seung Yeon.”

“Xiao Zhan...”

“Tell me you don’t like him at all.”

“No, Xiao Zhan, I care about him and... and I like him.”

Xiao Zhan removed hand from his crotch, lifted his head at Yibo and looked dead seriously.

“I like him but not how you think, I mean, not so much, Lord...” Yibo sighed out, closed his eyes, collecting thoughts, “Xiao Zhan, you see, since I met you I hadn’t become blind or deaf. I still can see other nice guys around me, I can evaluate them and look at their butts, the thing is that I just don’t wanna do it, get it? Because I have the most handsome butt in the whole world, with a terribly posessive temper, but what can I do...”

“Fool,” Xiao Zhan mumbled but he couldn’t hide the fact he liked that.

“Yes, I like Cho Seung Yeon,” he confessed because it was time they put all the dots over the “i”, “He’s nice, he helped us and I feel sorry for him. And, maybe, if I hadn’t met you, I’d go for him. But I don’t think about having sex with him and if I think, I’ll send this thoughts away because I’m with you, Zhan. I’ve chosen you by myself, I’m in love with you, I love you, and really want you to move your hand back to...”

“You, asshole,” he was shocked by his audacity and bit Yibo’s earlobe couple of times but still returned his hand and undid his zip, slid under the pants of his boyfriend and, having embraced, finally, the naked memeber, strocked. Yibo moaned and closed his eyes, feeling, as Zhan’s lips whispered to him scorchingly:

“Imagine that’s my tongue... That I’m doing it with my mouth... Carressing you at the base, and your head is on my tongue... Do you... like my tongue?”

“God, yes,” Yibo moaned, readily succumbing to the game. He didn’t expect something like that from Xiao Zhan and suggested that was directly connencted with the feeling of safety that captivated them. Because no one was gonna break in to them, no one was gonna start massacre, they weren’t breaking any rules anymore, they had nothing to fear now...

“Do you remember, what my tongue’s like, Yibo?” Zhan purred into his ear.

“’Course,” Yibo liked lips, “It’s hot and flexible... So quirky, Zhan, mmm! God... Don’t stop...”

“I won’t, honey, imagine how I’m strocking your frenulum with it, under the head... Sweet, innit?”

“Yeah... Yeah, oh my god...”

“Cum right into my mouth, Yibo, I like the taste of your sperm...”

“Zhan...”

“Come one, I’m ready, my love, my one and only Yibo...”

And Yibo came right into Xiao Zhan’s hand, and the latter carefully gathered the drops into his hand so that he’d be less stained.

Yibo moaned soundfully and didn’t pay attention to the fact that it ached and stabbed in his chest after orgasm. Xiao Zhan took out earlier purchased wet wipes and wiped the fingers.

“I see why you bought them,” Yibo smiled, “Pull your pants down a bit, I want to caress you too.”

“It’ll be uncomfortable, and to stretch the left hand is painfull,” he mentioned, “It’s okay, next time.”

“Oh, trust me, I won’t forget,” Yibo still lay with blissfully closed eyes, “I’m taking what’s mine. All your orgasms will be mine, Zhan, I’ll learn how to keep you on top for hours, do you believe me?”

The guy laughed gently, turned his face to him and touched his chick with lips:

“I want to believe.”

They got out the truck in Oklahoma-City worn-out, ruffled but happy. The guys ran to pee, then cleaned themselves a little bit. They tried not to by anything and to save money but they wanted to brush teeth so badly, and change their underwear. Xiao Zhan found two single-use brushes for them and a little toothpaste that they handed at dentist’s in form of samples. Then the guys saw a small store and bought two pairs of socks there. But they still had to put their purchases somewhere and Yibo’s attention caught a small shoulder bag.

“Take it,” Zhan approved.

It wasn’t necessary but it was really more comfortable like that. They bought it and put their purchases there, and Pablo’s wallet and SD card too.

The last moment Wang Yibo also took a colorful journal in a glossy package. Not because he was bored with Xiao Zhan and they had nothing to talk about, of course not. But because he’d alreadt started to dive Xiao Zhan into the context of a usual life beyond the perimeter. They spent long time in Oklahoma-City, not less then half and hour. For the last ten minutes they sat on the bottom of the truck, dangling their feet outside, eating two juicy burhers and drinking cold fizzy cola.

He could read it in Xiao Zhan’s eyes without any words that he felt like in Heaven. Actually, he shared that.

Guillermo stood at the side, looking at them quietly, smoked and smiled.
Their next stop was Springfield, Missouri, it would take them seven hours and a half, so the guys lay in their hole, having turned on the flashlight. Zhan kept the light, Yibo, having put the folder under his head, read out news for him and then explained to Zhan their meaning, bringing him up to date:

“Soft Brexit – the Cabinet of Ministers of Great Britain, approved the preliminary text of the agreement on the country's withdrawal from the European Union”, he read, “Well, that’s not so interesting... What’s next? President Trump continues to pursue a policy to limit the migration flow to the United States. In November, additional military personnel were sent to the southern borders to prevent illegal immigrants from crossing the border...”

“Why does president Trump doesn’t want that?” Zhan asked with genuine interest.

“My father told me that there are too many immigrants and they cause joblessness, drug dealing and crime...” Yibo said though he had never really been interested in politics for twenty years of his life.”

“Can you tell me about our president,” Xiao Zhan asked and Yibo, sighing, started to talk. It seemed he had to formulate his opinion on really-really a lot of situations because he had a person now how was like a blank sheet.

Yibo fully realised that only when they started to discuss the journals articles in paragraphs, Zhan always stopped him on every second word, asking to clarify. He was like a child, exploring the world, or an alien, like in phantastic movies about “accidental travellers” from other planets. Zhan was interested in everything, showed keen interest to every topic and overwhelmed Yibo with questions. The guy often didn’t know himself what to say but tried to answer all his questions so that not to loose his face. At some moment he also realised that Xiao Zhan was absolutely defensless in front of the world and everything that was going to open for him. It was possible to write anything on his blank sheet. How lucky what there was him with Xiao Zhan, Yibo. He suddenly wanted to protect Xiao Zhan from the whole world, not to let anyone dip the naive, open soul of this guy into evil, into darkness, in lies. Readin articles to him, Wang Yibo was thinking that, Xiao parents might have probably wanted to protect their son from the evil of the outer world, maybe that’s why they trusted John and followed him. But how that turned out!

They reached Springfield by the night. They managed only to go to the restrom and throw away couple of empty bottles, then they got back and slept throught the way till the next stop in St Louis.

“At first I didn’t want to wake you up, lads,” Guillermo was kinda excusing himself, helping Yibo get down from the truck, “but then we’ll drive to Chicago without stops almost the whole day. So, if you want to relieve yourself, buy water and eat before the final sprint then you’d better do it now.”

The guys were drowsy, exhausted by the permanent road and stuffiness but they still took two bottkes of water and several sandwiches for the journey.

They didn’t really want anything now, just to finish that as fast as possible, and, of course, shower and stretch their legs near the open window.

“I think I underappreciated the value of fresh air whre I’d grown up,” Xiao Zhan admitted when they got back inside.

But that was final push, in front of them – the final destination point, Chicago.
“I’m coming home,” Yibo thought. Thought he had no home there for more than a year the guy still felt that city as his little homeland. It seemed to him that in Chicago they’d make it. Chicago wouldn’t let them down.

Chapter Text

They reached Chicago at noon.

Wang Yibo and Xiao Zhan left the pepper truck very much done after the road and constant stuffiness. They greedily breathed in fresh air, trying to wake their minds up. They stood near the truck, lost, Guillermo didn’t rush them anywhere though. Actually, he looked at the guys friendly, smoked slowly, then asked Yibo (he guessed almost immediately that Yibo was the leader in their couple):
“How are you? Do you need medicine?”

The guy shaked his head:

“Is it alright, thank you, don’t worry,” he clarified, “I need to cut down on pills, I’m already sick of them...”

“That’s true,” he smiled approvingly, “Do you know where to go?”

“Pablo gave me the address,” Yibo said, not going into details, “Thank you for the risk, and for the rest... I mean, thank you.”

“That’s alright,” he replied, “Pablo told me you were from the ranch El Rescate. So it’s almost personal for me. My sister lived there for six years.”

“Your sister?” Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo lifted their heads at him with interest, “Who’s she? What’s her name? What’s she doing now?”

“She managed to escape,” he said, “Paloma. Paloma Apreggio. Do you know her?”

The guys were looking at him shocked and then exchanged glances and laughed:
“Of course we do!” Yibo said.

“There’re not so many people in the community, after all,” Xiao Zhan smiled.

“We heard about that runaway, everyone did!” Yibo admired, “She broke through eventually, didn’t she? Did she do that? Did she get in touch with you?”

“Yes, she did,” Guillermo answered, “She, just like you, left far from New Mexico, she’s hiding...”

“Did she say anything about Lia?” Yibo asked, “About Lia Reichel?”

He shaked his head abruptly:

“No, we don’t have much time for talking after all,” he smiled shyly, "But everything she told me... I hate this filthy hole. So if you manage to destroy it, boys, I’ll be proud that I contributed to this deal.”

Saying goodbye, they warmly shaked hands, and Yibo and Zhan went down the road into their new life.

Their way was till the nearest subway where they bought a ticket and headed to the station, written in the note with the address Pablo’d given them. Yibo noticed that Xiao Zhan looked really insecure, for real, like a foreign tourist of a guy from the remote village that’s visiting their city for the first time. Actually, that was true. Zhan was a step away from Yibo, always hiding behind his back, but Yibo firmly held his hand and led him.

Then they entered the compartment, Xiao Zhan broke down and whispered into Yibo’s ear:

“It seems everyone’s looking at us, Yibo. Is that because we’re holding hands?”
“No,” he said confidently, “That’s because we smell and look like a couple of illegal immigrants or tramps.”

But Wang Yibo only held Xiao Zhan tighter. He wouldn’t let go of his hand, not now, after they’d been through so much to get this opportunity: hold each other’s hands in public.

The guys reached the needed station and started to seek the destination for the note. It read that a reliable man was someone named Silvio Aguarres and he was an owner of the hostel “Midnight”. They even wrote his phone number but the guys had nothing to call from so they had to stroll for a bit around the streets before they found that exact place.

Hostel “Midnight” turned out to be a semi-basement space of the lowest quality. If someone decided to give this flophouse at least one star that would already be a win. Its romantic name was excused by the fact that it offered check-in at any time of the day, even at night, without any additional money for that. There was nothing else romantic in this pigsty. A cockroach ran right in front of Yibo right when they came in.

A drunk man with red eyes and a week-long bristle met them at the check-in desk.

“Hello, sir,” Yibo was the courtesy itself, the guy could have sworn that he was the first to address to this man like that, “Can we see here Mr. Silvio Aguarres?”
The man, not hiding his disgust, as a single fact the he conversed with the guest was enough sacrifice from his side, replied:

“Well, let’s say it’s me.”

Yibo smiled forcedly:

“We are friends of Pablo Cruz. He told us we can contact you as a reliable person,” the face of the hostel owner didn’t change, “About the overnight stay,” the guy added.

“Well, let’s say that’s possible,” he said and kept drilling them with unfriendly glare, maybe, a little drunk.

Having taken a pause, Yibo eventually decided to ask:

“So can we stay here?”

“Are you Wang Yibo?” he asked rudely.

“Yes,” he answered carefully, “and that’s my friend...”

“Fifteen bucks a day for two,” he broke him off and sniffed trumpet-like, just like people who are going to spit out to the side, “Without breakfast, shower and restroom are common, but you’ll have a locked up cabinet for your belongings. Are you taking it?”

As if they had a choice. Yibo put a twenty dollar note in front of him without any words, and the man added:

“If you’re taking a cabinet it’s a dollar.”

“We are,” Yibo said, “Can we wash the clothes here and... call another state?”

“For those who take a cabinet, I suppose, the call is for free,” the host smiled wryly, showing his bad rare teeth. He nodded at the old wired telephone on the desk, put his feet down from the low crossbar under the table and took a key with a number 05 from among the wall hooks and threw it at Yibo. He was caught off guard but took it. It turned out that it was a cabinet key. They didn’t have a room key since they didn’t even have a door. That was just a doorway into a big room, filled with bunk beds, and little square windows under the ceiling.

“It seems like I got back to the house of laborers,” Yibo dragged quietly when they entered.

It smelled in the room but it wasn’t crowded: there was just one fat man sleeping and snoring.

“Was it so horrible there?’ Xiao Zhan asked in a whisper.

“Almost,” Yibo replied, “But I didn’t pay for anything there.”

In a minute the hostel owner brought them two sets of worn out bed linen. The beds smelled damp. They chose ones in the corner that were almost right next to each other, farther from the sleeping man, and made their beds. Then they put the folder and Yibo’s bad into the cabinet, the guy kept only the wallet with himself, and went outside, having said to the host:

“We’ll be right back.”

“I’m not your mom,” he replied, sitting back into his place and placing his feet in the crossbar again.

“A horrible man,” Xiao Zhan said immediately when they were outside, “a horrible place.”

“Just hold it for a little more,” Yibo told him, “I just need to restore my documents and my access to savings. Then I’ll be able to rent a clean flat for us, maybe on the outskirts but still.”

“Where are we going now?”

“In Walmart. We need to buy some shampoo, razors, and a couple changes of underwear pants... And something to eat. Are you not hungry?”

“Just a little,” he smiled shyly. Yibo felt stinged: Zhan was embarrassed to ask him for something. He was hungry but was shy to talk about his need because he saw Yibo saved money, because he didn’t know if he had the right to... Damn, that was bad.

They went into the supermarket and took a basket, went along the shelves. Xiao Zhan looked around with such a big shock, as if he was in a palace of opulence. Actually, it was true. They bought a couple of underwear pants (*God, Yibo, I’m taking on the colorful underwear for the first time in my life, can you imagine?), disposable razors and shaving foam, washing powder, body sponge, deodorant and then Yibo took him to the shelves with shampoos and shower gels and announced:

“Here, Zhan, choose. Now you can smell whatever you want.”

The man looked, enchanted, at the abundance of choice:

“But I don’t know...”

“You can open them and smell.”

“Really?” he was shocked, “Well, then...”

He opened and smelled, carefully getting the bottles back, he fiddled with them for a long time but Yibo didn’t hurry him, let him enjoy the moment, gave him the opportunity to find something for himself and not imposed on him. But Xiao Zhan got lost and it obviously made him unhappy. He turned to Yibo and said almost desperately:

“I don’t know, I... I like them all...”

“I can understand you,” he said patiently and came closer, “Then choose any. You’ll try something new next time. And then something else. And it’ll be each time until you get sick of it or until you find what’s yours.”

Xiao Zhan looked at him seriously and replied:

“Alright, it’s good I don’t have to seek like that among people. I already found what’s mine.”

And Yibo felt so shy.

They came back to the hostel, changed the underwear and everything they’d worn they threw into the washing machine.

“My machine is a grandma now,” Silvio told them, pushing back the iron board so that it won’t hinder them, in a room that looked like a closet, “but it still does a good job. They don’t do them like that anymore. The dryer hammer during work but that’s alright. But don’t turn on any other mode except “combined” otherwise it’ll heat up...”

Yibo readied the washing machine because Xiao Zhan didn’t know what to do with it because he’d been served by the laborers all his life before. While the antediluvian machine was hammering and humming, the guys went into the common shower in the hostel. Happily, the fat man was still sleeping so they showered alone. The common shower consisted of four boothes, that, luckily, could be locked.

“Like in the house of Brothers,” Yibo chuckled, catching flashbacks all the time.
They didn’t split and got into one booth, because the chance to take one shower was really appealing.

Wang Yibo felt Xiao Zhan was slightly embarrassed to get naked in front of him just like that so he pulled down his pants first and turned on the water. Xiao Zhan behind his back took off his underwear too but looked at him sadly, really frustrated. Yibo understood, why: Xiao Zhan saw him fully naked and was able to see him from all sides for the first time since that moment. And still, if the majority of bruises dissolved, the biggest ones, covering his thighs, back, sides – were still there, though they went paler.

“Come one” Yibo encouraged Zhan, pulling him to himselfs, under the warm water jets. Xiao Zhan hugged him by the neck and kissed sweetly, “Here, tilt your head...”

Yibo opened their new shampoo (they ended up with a peach one) and generously poured it on Xiao Zhan’s head. He wanted to wash out that cheap pine aroma, the one that the dogs at the ranch El Rescate were trained for, from his beloved forever. Yibo foamed Zhan’s hair, smearing the foam along his shoulders, the guy smiled and squinted, became more liberated, laid-back. Zhan carefully poured some shampoo in his hand and combed fingers through Yibo’s hair, massaging his head with strong, relaxing movements:
“It’s nice,” Xiao Zhan said.

“What exactly?” Yibo asked, “When your hair is washed or when do you do it?”

“Both...” Zhan’s voice became hollow, Yibo noticed that he was a little aroused. Xiao Zhan was embarrassed, and turned his eyes away. Yibo bit lower, holding back his smile, took their sponge, shampooed it, went behind Zhan’s back, ran it down his back, shoulder blades and waist, stroked his shoulders with soapy hands, lowered his arms to his buttocks and pressed his crotch in between them, letting a shuddered moan from the guy. Xiao Zhan leaned against the wall in front of himself, closing eyes as if giving Yibo “green light for everything”. Wang Yibo kissed his soapy shoulders, rubbing against his crotch, and his hands lay on Zhan’s semi-hard dick. Soap foam was very helpful. He caressed Xiao Zhan quickly and confidently, rubbing against him from behind, the guy moaned, leaning against a tiled wall. Yibo wasn’t going to penetrate him, they weren’t really ready for that, and soap as lubricant wasn’t the best option. But it didn’t stop Yibo from sliding in between his halves and caressing Zhan’s member and balls with a hand. Anyway, he came quite quickly, pressing the forehead against the tiles. Yibo pinched him against the wall, he wanted to cum himself so badly now. He squeezed Xiao Zhan’s buttocks with fingers, slid his member up-down in the hole, touching it with his head, and when he understood he was on the verge – he broke down and poked into him, penetrating just a little, not even with a whole head, but came inside and over his hole, smearing the sperm with head cock. God, that was so sweet, so good…

They didn’t say anything, just laughed and washed off the foam, sperm and smells of their previous life. It’s called “start with a blank canvas.”

“What are we doing now?” Xiao Zhan asked when they hung their washed clothes to dry on the empty bunks and took out the already cold but still tasty chinese boxed food they'd bought today to finally have some food.

“We’re eating and then I’m calling my mother,” Yibo said, “Have you ever tried any chinese dishes?”

“My mother cooked them occasionally,” he said, studiously smelling the boxes, “but she always complained the taste wasn’t the same because she couldn’t find some ingredients...”

“Can you eat with chopsticks?”

The guys shaked head:

“I think I could when I was a child when we moved to the community but no one gave us chopsticks there so I forgot... Can you?”

“Yeah, look,” Yibo picked up some noodles from the box with sticks and put them into his mouth with pleasure, “Do you want me to teach you?”

“Sure! But, Yibo... I didn’t ask about it... But what are we doing with...” he cautiously glances at the sleeping man, “with our case? Are we going to the federals today?”

Yibo shaked his head:

“Tomorrow. At first our clothes should get dry, then we need to find a couple of jackets, it’s already cold in Chicago... And... we need to play it safe.”

“What do you mean?”

“You’ll find out tomorrow. Eat.”

“Then show me...”

“Here, look, you place one stick between your thumb and a pointer...”

In the evening Yibo called his mother from the big telephone that was at Silvio’s front desk. He even went somewhere politely, scratching his butt, and left him alone.

Mother cried again but not like last time. Just for the sake of appearance. He heard demanding notes in her voice:

“I want to see my son! Tell me where you are, I’m taking the ticket right today and I’m coming!”

“Come on, mom, I’m really tired at work now...”

“What work?! Your expedition is over!”

“But I still can’t stay without work, mom,” he said reasonably, “I’ve already settled down here, in Chicago...”

“Why haven’t you still bought yourself a new phone?! Do you have no money? Let me send you some!”

“No, mam, I’ll buy one this week, I promise, come on...”

And it was like that for twenty minutes.

Finally, he finished with her and came back to Xiao Zhan. Despite that they both had ridden lying and could have slept when they wanted they still felt exhausted. They got into their bunks, smelled with dump and mold, turned faces to each other and fell asleep, having intertwined fingers.

They woke up earlier the next day just because their neighbor was stomping loudly at the room. It turned out he worked at night shifts. He left in the evening when the guys were sleeping and got back early in the morning, waking his new neighbors up.

First, Xiao Zhan checked their clothes: it seemed dry. Having washed, shaved and brushed their teeth the guys went out to the closest cafe, took a meal for breakfast and then had it, and Yibo shared with Zhan his plans for that day:

“First we find jackets, then we go to one place... At first, I want to make a noise around this case so that they wouldn’t just wave us off, you know? And only then we’re going to the federals. We’ll protect ourselves as much as possible and only then we’re going to the federals.”

That’s what they did. After breakfast they went searching for jackets. Of course, Yibo didn’t have much money and they were rapidly spending them, so they couldn’t afford anything special, so they stopped at second-hand store, Wang Yibo even felt a tinge of guilt:

“Sorry, I can’t offer you anything better than that,” he told his beloved, “It’s temporary. But when I find a job...”

“Yibo, don’t,” Zhan interrupted him gently, “I grew in the community, do you remember? I actually wore only second-hand clothes.”

They chose two jackets, a black one for Zhan, Yibo found a gray one with metallic hue, moreover, he doubted his choice but Zhan was heavily talking him into buying it because it “suited him so much, really, you look sexy in it” and that was a difference maker.

Then Wang Yibo took Xiao Zhan to have dinner. They took a folder and a SD card from the hostel and then went to the internet cafe (one hour for four dollars).

It was crowded. They were sitting, wearing headphones, each at their own monitor, a clear snapshot of American society: pimply teenage gamers, poor people who had neither their own laptop nor computer, a lot of foreigners that just came by to check e-mails.