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So much has happened in such little time. Hawkins has been broken into four, with a huge half-opened rift in the middle of it, and Max’s in a coma.
Mike couldn’t believe it. He never thought it’d get to this level of extreme… He was hoping for a normal month of summer where he’d spend time with the Byers, not an entire apocalypse. He’s surprised that the town is still intact– sort of, it’s habitable, to say the least… Plenty of people have just moved out and how could he blame them? If he could he’d leave Hawkins but he knows they can’t leave it like this, it isn’t like anybody else could do it. Well, maybe he could leave judging how he hasn’t done anything productive to the party. It never feels like he’s doing anything useful, plenty of other people get the brunt of it all, and what about him? Nothing. Nothing happens to him because he’s a coward and that’s it. Will says he’s the “heart” of the group, which he doubts. Yeah, he can have those moments, and he can raise the morale of the team but that’s nothing compared to everyone else. He can’t even be a good friend. Maybe… Maybe things would be better if El didn’t save him from the Quarry. It wouldn’t stop this whole moment, but at least people would be happy. El would be happy. She doesn’t need him.
El would be better off without him, she’s powerful being independent. Mike envies her, he wishes he could be empowering like that. Same as Will, but he’s just different– In a good way! He’s an extraordinary person! There’s Dustin, who is the most friendly person Mike has ever met, he deserves better than him. Dustin is the one he jumped for, he’d jump off a cliff for anyone. Lucas is misunderstood, but that doesn’t change how much of a great friend he is. When his mind is on something he is determined to chase it. Max is funny, and enjoyable, but too much like him. Or he’s just projecting onto her, it’s why he doesn’t like her. Maybe if- when she wakes up he can make amends. Make amends to all of them. That or he… You can piece it together.
Right now the party is at the hospital, watching over Max. El can’t find her so they’re brainstorming at the moment. Mike, Nancy, Lucas, and the Byers are still left clueless, they don’t know how this happened, El might… However, Mike dares to ask, “So, how did this happen in the first place?” Nancy is quick to answer, “Vecna only targets those who have trauma, giving them nosebleeds, headaches, and hallucinations from time to time,” Mike makes sure it isn’t obvious, but he can feel a dread hanging over him. All of those symptoms… Mike’s had them before. Surely, it’s just mental illness, right? That isn’t any better but it has to be something other than being a victim of Vecna’s. Going through the horrors that all of them dealt with would be good as an explanation as it is– all of those monsters from the Upside Down and all the events that occurred because of it– anybody would go crazy from it. You can’t even tell anyone either or they’ll think you’re really crazy. Maybe it’d seem a little believable. An entire piece of Hawkins has opened up so maybe? Oh well, that isn’t relevant, Mike’s getting sidetracked.
“Something on your mind?” Nance comments, acknowledging how deep in thought Mike looks. “Huh? Oh… Just imagine how hard it must’ve been, sounds awful,” Mike says. It isn’t a lie, mostly, he’s just more focused on other thoughts he’s having but does acknowledge how painful it must be for Max. Nancy hums in acknowledgment, and it’s back to the silence that shrouded the room before. This gives Mike an opening to space out for however long he needs. So what if he is a victim, does that mean it’s his fault for getting people killed because he left? Maybe… Probably. Maybe if he hadn’t left Max would still be here, from how Lucas went over it– briefly– those symptoms began appearing later throughout their adventure. When Nancy described those symptoms he realized that he had them much longer than her. So why hasn’t he died any earlier? Was it just… the wrong place? Why should that matter though? He’s having a hard time piecing it together, and what makes it worse is that he feels that he can’t bring it up to anybody. They’ve gone through too much already and will probably worry for him and try to avoid a similar outcome similar to Max and everyone else who’s died. Reasonable. He needs to do something though! He’s been off the whim for too long! He hasn’t even been to the Upside Down either. The best people get the worst of it, and then there’s him who’s hardly done anything but make it more difficult on other people. …Does that make him one of the worst people alive– no, there are people much worse than him, and Vecna is one of those many. That’s someone who is unforgivable! Some people probably won’t forgive him or won’t ever talk to him again– or both– but that’s fine! As long as something’s done about Vecna it won’t have to matter in the long term.
…It’s easy to assume that he isn’t expecting to live– not like he really wants to either… That doesn’t matter right now, he doesn’t have time to worry about himself when more are in harm! Max’s head is somewhere that’s detached from her body, probably somewhere in the Upside Down. He needs to do something! Anything! Just be useful! His head rang in his ears that he hadn’t even noticed the audible sigh he exhaled, catching Eleven’s attention.
“Mike, is something wrong?” is what she asked as Mike looked over at her. “Just…” he spoke softly, “Stressed.” El nods in agreement, everybody understands the predicament they're in and it is no easy one. Mike wants to leave, the atmosphere isn’t helping with his thoughts, but it feels disrespectful to leave. Surely they’d understand, they’re all still humans, and you can’t stay in a hospital room forever. Thankfully, Nancy seemed to notice his demeanor. “We should probably go home, Mom’s probably worried or something…” She says. It feels like an excuse but the others understand, they’ll have to leave and go home too. Mike just appreciates that somebody else said it than himself. The Wheelers leave the room and start making their way to the entrance of the hospital and eventually Nance’s car.
Mike still feels bad for leaving and tons of other reasons… oh well, he can think more about everything when he's back home and not bothering anybody.