Chapter Text
Asa couldn’t quite say that her second date with Denji was going according to plan.
Despite the disaster that was their aquarium date, Denji’s wish was to go on a second date. Asa wasn’t sure if it was because he liked her or if he was just lonely. Either way, Yoru was excited to continue her plan to make him into a weapon. Even if she hated to admit it to herself, Asa was excited, too. She might’ve failed the first time, but this time she would prove that she could make somebody fall for her. To spite Yoru, of course, but also because it would be nice to know somebody liked her. Denji especially.
Asa knew better than to base her plan around an encyclopedia this time around. (She still maintained that facts on aquatic creatures was an optimal seduction tactic, but Denji was clearly too dense to appreciate it.) It wasn’t in her nature to go into a date without a plan, though, especially not with so much on the line. To her own embarrassment, this led her to teen magazines. After peeling through countless plastic-sheened pink covers, analyzing articles and taking quizzes, she had outlined a two-phase date plan that was sure to end in Denji begging to be her boyfriend.
“You need to kiss him,” Yoru had said over Asa’s shoulder as she scanned instructions on how to do the perfect look-pretty-without-looking-like-you-care hairstyle.
“Why?” Asa asked with irritation, ignoring the heat rising on her face at the suggestion. “The plan was to make him my boyfriend.”
“Do you really think you can? After that disaster of a date?” Yoru raised an eyebrow. “It’ll be easier to take a different route. You could make him your boyfriend, and make him yours emotionally, or you could kiss him, and make him yours physically.”
That made Asa’s skin crawl. She was completely inexperienced in kissing, for one thing, but it didn’t seem right to take ownership of him like that.
Yoru rolled her eyes, reading her mind as always. “If you don’t want to, I will. Or I’ll-”
“You’ll kill me,” Asa finished her sentence, the threat so familiar it hardly shook her anymore. Luckily, the teen magazines had tips for kissing, too, so she tacked on a final part to her plan and ignored how the thought of kissing Denji tugged at her stomach.
Except now Denji was getting in the way of that plan at every chance he got. They were supposed to share one ice cream; it encouraged cooperating and bridging personal space. But Denji wouldn’t agree to getting chocolate, the flavor of romance and also Asa’s favorite. He said that he’d never been to an ice cream shop with so many flavors and wanted to try something new. Asa was willing to work past one road bump, but then he chose mint chocolate chip. Now when she kissed him he would taste like toothpaste. She shuddered at the thought but soldiered on.
The complications only continued after they sat down to eat. Denji slobbered up his ice cream like a feral animal. There was no other way to describe it. But it was endearing to see him so thrilled to eat something new. He left green dribbles on his cheek, and without thinking it through, Asa leaned into him to brush it off. She ran her thumb over the spots of melting mint, dragging her finger across his cheek to the corner of his mouth. Self-consciousness hit her as she brushed his bottom lip. His eyes dropped to her own lips as she did it, a blush blossoming on his cheeks. She pulled back, feeling sheepish, but the way Denji was looking at her shifted softer. Without meaning to, she created the perfect prelude to their kiss.
By the twentieth time she had to wipe drool off his face Asa was just annoyed. Part of her suspected he started doing it on purpose to get her to touch him.
Despite the hiccups in Phase 1, Phase 2 was almost seamless. Getting Denji out of the shop did require some manhandling; she dragged him out by the wrist while he grumbled about licking up the last of his ice cream “soup.” He dropped the complaints after they reached Asa’s chosen destination. A park near the ice cream shop had planted new flowers that lined the pathways in kaleidoscope colors. They looked especially radiant in the light of the setting sun.
With Yoru’s coaxing, Asa slipped her hand in Denji’s, lacing their fingers together. His palms were a little bit sweaty. Mostly soft.
They had to leave at Asa’s insistence because Phase 2 involved using the time of day to set the mood for the kiss. It was just as she planned it: the sun sank enough to wash the world in gold as they reached the lake at the center of the park. The rays of sunset severed against the lake, ripples glittering. They sat on a bench at the lakeside, watching the sun fall lower, and settled into a comfortable silence.
Denji released his hand from Asa’s. She panicked. What had she done wrong? But he wasn’t withdrawing; instead he moved his arm over her back, resting his hand on the bench behind her. Their eyes caught, holding contact for a taut moment. They both snapped their heads back to watching the lake.
He cleared his throat. “I guess you were kinda right about leavin’ the shop. It’s a pretty time of day. Whaddya call it again?”
He glanced at her again, but this time he didn’t tear his gaze away when she met it. She forced herself to not shy away. In this lighting, his brown eyes gained a new depth, spotted with amber and topaz flecks. Since when did he have the eyes of some romance lead? The sunset illuminated his hair, too, making the gold strands glow from the odd ends sticking up to the bangs falling over his forehead.
“Golden hour,” Asa replied. He embodied it.
“Focus,” Yoru hissed, and Asa just barely stopped herself from flinching. For a moment she forgot there was a third party on this date, forgot there was a mission at hand. “You’re supposed to be kissing.”
They’d checked off every part of Asa’s plan but one. If she wanted this to be her moment instead of Yoru’s, it was now or never. She closed her eyes, parted her lips, and waited.
And waited.
“What are you doing?” Denji asked, sounding a bit disturbed.
Asa flew backwards, heat rising on her face from anger and embarrassment. “You’re supposed to kiss me!”
“What?”
“You idiot!” She shouted, pushing to her feet. “I got you ice cream, I took you to this beautiful place at the most romantic time of day, and you’re still too dense to do anything about it. What’s wrong with you? I put in all this time to look pretty tonight for nothing!”
“I-I knew that!” Denji sputtered, but his shocked expression said otherwise. “I was gonna to kiss you.”
“Then why didn’t you?”
Denji crossed his arms, looking away. “Cuz, uh, when you pause like that, it builds the tension.”
“Now I’m definitely tense!”
“Well, now that you’ve insulted me, I’m not going to kiss you,” he said with petulance.
Asa reeled, fuming, and balled her fists so tight she could feel her fingernails cutting into her palms. “Fine!”
And despite Yoru begging her to try again, Asa stormed off without another word.
-
A sharp wooden sound pierced through the haze clouding Asa’s mind. She groaned at it, hoping it would go away on its own. But the sound was insistent, banging again and again, each time shaking a bit of her sleep away. It forced her into enough consciousness to realize it was a knock at the door.
Something had gotten her sick. Not a cold, which she would go to school with and suffer through, but something between a fever and stomach bug. She’d been bedridden when she wasn’t throwing up, losing all sense of time as she flowed in and out of consciousness. It was unideal, but she’d dealt with illness on her own before. Yoru, on the other hand, was not used to experiencing human diseases. She had been knocked out in the corner of her bed since the sickness started settling in.
Asa tumbled from her bed, struggling to unwrap herself from her sheets. Heat prickled over half her body while the other half begged to be buried in blankets again. With a shiver spasming almost her entire body, she opened the door.
It was Denji.
She almost swung the door back shut. The aquarium date was easy to beat, but in a way, the ice cream date had been worse. She was still processing his rejection of her kiss. If she could’ve gone the rest of her life without having to see him again, she would’ve. Except now, somehow, he was at her front door.
“I brought you the homework ‘n stuff that you missed,” he said.
Asa sighed. He was the only (living) person who knew where she lived, making him the closest thing she had to a friend. Now he was witnessing her at her worst; she hadn’t been able to haul herself into the shower, so her hair was twisting itself into a nest, and her oversized t-shirt was in need of a wash.
“Uh, do ya need anything?” he asked as he slid his backpack off his shoulders to take out her work. “You don’t look great.”
“I’m fine,” she mumbled, gripping the doorframe to hide the fact that she was able to keel over.
Denji saw through her act anyway. “Lemme come in to set this down, at least.”
Asa was too weak to stop him from pushing past her into her apartment. As if the humiliation of seeing the mess of her appearance wasn’t enough, now he was looking around her cluttered apartment. She hadn’t cleaned her dishes, in her haze she had knocked and kicked over various things that lay eschew on the floor, and her bed sheets were twisted into a hurricane. At least he couldn’t see the devil snoring on it.
Denji put her books on her kitchen counter and wandered to the sink. He picked up a knife with dried jam on it, examining the scene. “Too tired to clean?”
“I was just about to,” Asa lied. “If you leave I can get to it.”
“You live alone?” Denji asked, ignoring her dismissal.
Asa took the knife from him, tossing it back in the sink. She would herd him out by force if she had to. “Yeah. My parents were killed by devils.”
“Mine are gone, too. Been gone for years.”
Asa’s words snagged in her throat. She should’ve known after he mentioned having to take care of his younger sister that he was on his own, but it caught her off guard nonetheless. It didn’t seem right to try to kick him out again after he shared that.
He smiled at her, tight-lipped but full of understanding. “Here’s a deal. I’ll clean up your place if you let me make you dinner after I finish.”
Asa frowned. “That’s not a deal, that’s you doing two things for me for nothing in return.”
“But I got your school stuff for you, so now you owe me to let me help you.”
“What?” Asa blinked in confusion. His roundabout logic hurt her head. “Why? I don’t need your help.”
Denji looked her up and down, but this time Asa didn't feel judged. “Cuz I know what it’s like to be sick and not have anybody to take care of you. Now go lie down.”
Asa stood for a moment longer, as if staring him down might force him to leave, but he had made up his mind. She sat on her bed, resolving to watch to make sure this wasn’t some kind of prank. Having somebody else in her apartment felt uncomfortable, invasive. She was usually independent enough to get through stuff like this on her own. But maybe it wouldn’t hurt to let him help, just for a little bit.
The sound of running water and steady flame as Denji put a pot on the stove made her eyes grow heavy. She could lay back without falling asleep. After she rested her eyes for a minute she would get up and intervene. Denji started to hum and the melody vibrated through her body, lulling her to sleep.
A gentle nudge against Asa’s shoulder woke her up again. She grumbled in protest. This was the best she’d slept since she got sick.
“C’mon, you’ll want it when it’s warm,” a voice said, and Asa opened her eyes to a boy sitting at her side.
She jolted upright, remembering what had transpired. Denji was holding a bowl of ramen and chopsticks. He was sitting on her bed. That she was also sitting on. And he was very, very close.
“If you don’t take it, I’ll have to airplane it into your mouth,” he said with a teasing grin.
Asa snatched the bowl from him. Her dignity would not be compromised any further. She ate the first few noodles with caution, not sure if she could trust Denji to cook something edible, but it wasn’t just safe to eat. It was delicious. The broth warmed her throat on the way down.
Denji reached towards her as she ate, their thighs pressing together. “Lemme help you with your hair.”
She knew letting him help was a mistake. Now he thought she couldn’t even brush her own hair. She tried to scoot away. “You already did your two things.”
“I’ve done three things, because I also brought you your homework.” He could move faster than her, closing the distance between them again. “Trust me, I’ve detangled Nayuta’s hair too many times to count.”
Asa sighed and surrendered, bracing herself for him to rip through her hair. But again, he was being truthful. He used her hairbrush to undo each knot with care until he could thread his fingers through her hair from the crown of her head to the ends. There was a steady rhythm in his touch, confident but calming.
“Y’know what you can do to make it up to me?” Denji said. He had climbed around her bed to her other side, finishing his last strokes. “Teach me how to braid. Nayuta wants to do her hair.”
Asa set her drained bowl on her side table. Denji had organized her apartment more than it had been in months. Now she definitely owed him, and she couldn’t let herself be in debt to him. She’d made a fool of herself in front of him enough already. And as much as she hated to admit it, she didn’t want him to stop touching her.
“I’m not very good,” she warned.
Denji shrugged. “I know nothing, so better than me.”
She reached back to divide her hair in half. “I’ll do one, you’ll do the other. Just match me.”
After all the surprising things Denji had done that day, Asa was almost expecting him to be better than her at braiding. But at last his housewife skills had found their limits; he would lose track of which strand to weave next and force himself to start over. She watched him from the corner of her eye, his brows furrowing in an adorably intense amount of concentration. When he got extra frustrated he would bite his bottom lip.
“You were right about the mint chocolate chip ice cream,” Denji said, making Asa realize she had been staring at his lips for longer than she needed to. “It did taste like toothpaste. But I used to never be able to brush my teeth, so I kinda liked it. Toothpaste tastes special to me.”
Talking about ice cream was dangerously close to talking about what happened at the lake, but Asa wanted more of Denji however she could get it. “You couldn’t brush your teeth?”
“Didn't have a toothbrush. Couldn't afford toothpaste anyways. You wouldn’t believe how broke I used to be.”
Asa had been undoing her braid, and Denji mirrored her. But he took his time unthreading, his hand brushing her ear and the side of her face. Each touch awoke a butterfly in her stomach, fluttering and reverberating.
“But that’s not the point. I guess what I’m tryin’ to say is I’m sorry about all that.”
“It’s fine,” Asa said, regretful. She’d been arrogant about ice cream when Denji was trying to enjoy something he used to only dream of. “I was wrong, too, because something in that chocolate ice cream must’ve made me sick.”
“No—well, yeah, but I was talkin’ about the, uh, part where you wanted to kiss.”
“Oh.” She wanted to crawl under her sheets and hide. The memory had been haunting her in her restless sick sleep.
“You did look really pretty.” He spoke softly, as if he was scared of letting her hear him. She leaned in closer to catch each word. Their sides connected, his arm shifting back to let her lean into his chest. “You always do. Even now, all sick ‘n stuff. So pretty.”
Heat spread from her face all the way through her body, and this time it wasn’t from whatever she was sick with. “You’re pretty, too.”
“Nah, that’s just for girls.” Denji ducked his head away, but Asa still caught the blush bridging over his nose to both cheeks.
She shook her head. “No, guys too.”
He glanced up at her through the golden strands of hair falling over his forehead. The light filtering in through her apartment window was catching his eyes, highlighting each stroke of color in the pools of caramel. She wanted to memorize every detail in his eyes. Of all of him, really.
“You think so?” Denji asked. Asa couldn’t help but be drawn back to his lips again as he spoke. Would his lips on hers be as soft as his hands wandering in her hair, as his thigh and stomach melting along her side?
“I know so,” she said. “I’m looking at one of the prettiest guys right now.”
His face flourished deep pink. She drew nearer, testing how close she could get, waiting for him to refuse her again. The rejection didn’t come. Instead he bridged the last space between them, brushing his nose against hers. His breath against her lips sent the butterflies in her stomach into a storm. She reached up to cup his cheek as his hand traced her jaw gingerly, tilting her mouth up to his. The butterflies were escaping up out of her stomach now, rising up her throat.
Those weren’t butterflies at all.
“I’m gonna puke,” Asa blurted.
Denji’s eyes blew wide. “Not in my mouth!”
His gentle clasp on her face turned rough as he pushed her away from him. She folded in on herself, her stomach clenching, and just as the vomit reached her mouth Denji grabbed her ramen bowl and shoved it in front of her. Everything she had eaten came back up. Denji held her hair back as she retched, holding her steady.
“Nasty,” he said after she spat out the last bile. He disappeared with the vomit bowl and came back with a blanket.
“‘Not in my mouth?’” Asa asked.
Denji draped the blanket around her. “When I had my first kiss, the girl was so drunk she threw up in my mouth.”
Asa shuddered at the thought. If she hadn’t just puked up everything inside of her she would feel nauseous again. At least she knew their near-miss was less disgusting in comparison.
“My second kiss, the girl bit off my tongue.”
Asa frowned at Denji, concerned by the nonchalance in his voice. “Those girls sound awful.”
“They weren’t awful people, just…complicated, y’know?” He shrugged, looking out the window. “But sometimes it feels like girls always want something from me.”
“Like…sex?”
“I guess. Other stuff, too.” His gaze was distant now, his mind somewhere far away.
Guilt gnawed at Asa. His category of “other stuff” probably didn’t include being made into a weapon to defeat Chainsaw Man. Denji wasn’t between a cat and a criminal. Not even close. He deserved a better life. It was a blessing that Yoru was still passed out and unable to interfere. Asa had to find a way to save him.
“You’re looking tired again. I think you should go back to sleep,” Denji said with a smile so kind Asa wanted to cry.
She obeyed, laying back. He stood and walked to the door. Her heart sank. Part of her thought he was going to lie down with her.
“You’re leaving?” It came out more desperate than she meant for it to.
“Can’t leave Nayuta alone overnight. I told her I’d be back to put her to bed.” His eyes went soft. “You want me to stay?”
Asa rolled over to hide her blush. “Just wondering.”
“If you’re still sick tomorrow I’ll get someone to stay with Nayuta so I can stay with you, ‘kay?” He paused, and Asa could feel his gaze on her as he lingered in the doorway. “G’night Asa.”
The door clicked shut behind him, leaving her apartment more silent than ever.