Work Text:
Zhongli’s workplace is quiet now, save for the sound of his keyboard clicking. It’s already past working hours, and most of the employees have already returned home. As much as he loves to depart from this place, there’s something he needs to send to his director before heading back. So he completes that first before deciding that it’s time to turn off his laptop.
After a long day of work, he can finally see his boyfriend at home. Who’s either running on three cups of coffee to finish some kind of urgent work, or watching a lame movie just to laugh at the reviews later on. It doesn’t matter, as long as Zhongli can see him in person, that’s enough to unwind his tense body. Even though he does have the company of Venti’s messages while he has been working, it’s just never enough.
He needs to see those teal eyes and hug that lithe form again. Physically.
He steps out of his office, fishing the key from his pocket to lock the door. He’s surprised to see his coworker, Hu Tao, still here, her office bag dangling in her hand. She usually returns home on time since she has always hated the gloomy atmosphere of this building. But he assumes that she had something important to settle too.
“Hey, Zhongli! Should’ve known you would stay back,” Hu Tao greets, waiting for him as he locks his office. She sounds very excited, for some reason. “Do you know what day is tomorrow?”
Zhongli turns around after he keeps the key back into his pocket. He raises a questioning brow. “Saturday?”
“No, silly,” Hu Tao says, and they both start walking to the elevator. “It’s the first of April?”
Zhongli’s brows furrow as he presses the button to go down. While they wait for the elevator to arrive, he tries to remember which one of his friends has their birthday on the first of April.
Eventually, Hu Tao groans. “April Fools, Zhongli. April Fools!”
“Oh,” he simply says. He has totally forgotten all about it.
Almost immediately, Hu Tao leans closer to him and wiggles her eyebrows. He can already tell the amount of mischief that she’s planning, knowing that April Fools is practically her most exciting ‘celebration’. “So... do you have some kind of plan to take revenge on Venti?”
Zhongli frowns. That’s not what he’d expected. “And why must I plan revenge on him?”
“Oh come on, he got you like—two years in a row!” Hu Tao says, her eyes widening. They step into the elevator when it opens with a ding, and she presses the button to the ground floor. “Don’t tell me you’ve never thought of getting him back? Yanfei never leaves me alone until she gets me even!”
“Hm.” Zhongli closes his eyes and considers. He has always found Venti’s pranks amusing, even though it can be a little bothersome at certain times. But he doesn’t see the reason to get him back when he knows that his boyfriend only wants to have fun. Plus, the perks of getting thrown into harmless pranks means he gets to be spoiled with kisses as an apology, so he doesn’t really mind. “I’ll think about it.”
“You should,” Hu Tao grins, nodding. “I’m sure it’ll give him a good laugh if you ever try to get him back. Because... haha, you know.”
Zhongli genuinely doesn’t know. He crosses his arms over his chest. Prompting. “Because?”
“You’re—well, you,” Hu Tao says. He has a feeling that she was purposely waiting for the elevator to open, because the next thing he knows, she’s running (in heels, mind you) when she says, “It’ll definitely catch him off guard—because he’ll never expect an old man like you to play a prank on him!”
The sound of the building is filled with nothing but the echoes of her heels, before they slowly fade away. He only shakes his head and sighs.
While Zhongli is not old, he admits that he can be rather boring; giving people long explanations and being very technical. Though, he doesn’t think he’ll ever change that part of himself. Not when he’s accepted by the most liveliest person on earth, who would often hear his rambling—no matter how bland it is—with a fond smile on his face.
Though, he has a feeling that Hu Tao’s right. He has never made a move during April Fools, so Venti will least expect it if he suddenly decides to pull one.
He should decide all of that later. For now, he has no pranks in mind, and thinking of one after a tiring day of work takes too much effort.
➳
Zhongli unlocks the front door, only to regret a second later for not being much quieter. He notices how he has accidentally woken up Venti from his sleep, almost causing the other to fall from the couch. The television is currently rolling the credits, and there are three empty coffee-stained mugs on the table. Venti must’ve fallen asleep after he has finished his work, seeing how his laptop is closed right next to the mugs.
“Heeey, welcome back,” Venti greets, a dopey smile on his face as he moves to wrap his arms around Zhongli’s waist. It’s obvious that he’s only half-awake, especially with the slur in his voice, but the hug he gives is still as tight as any other day. “How’s work? You’re late—or I think it’s late. What time is it again?”
Zhongli finds himself smiling at the sight of black strands sticking out from the top of Venti’s head. He tries to flatten them with a hand, but it proves to be futile when it sticks right back up. “It’s half past eight. But to answer your question, work has been alright.”
“That’s—good,” Venti mutters, eyes blinking heavily. He covers his mouth when he yawns, before pointing to the kitchen counter. “Cooked rice and egg for you. Already ate mine, but I’ll sit with you while you eat.”
Zhongli shakes his head. “That won’t be necessary,” he says, and he guides Venti to their bedroom. Venti tries to protest, but at this point, Zhongli’s sure that he doesn’t even know half of the things he’s saying. “You should sleep. You were awake since last night.”
Venti mumbles something incoherent, which is something close to an argument, but he allows Zhongli to pull the covers over him anyway. It doesn’t even take five seconds before he falls asleep, snoring lightly.
Zhongli observes Venti for a few minutes, before he frowns. It can’t be helped. There are days where both of them are busy, and this is one of them. Venti does his work from home, and there’s no exact schedule on when he’s supposed to be working. The only thing Zhongli knows is that once the latter gets work from his boss, it’s always painful to see him staying up late at night, dark bags under his eyes every morning until he fully finishes his project.
Zhongli decides to do some cleaning first before eating. He washes the mugs on the table and scoops out some rice from the rice cooker. The rice is a little dry, most likely from the lack of water, but it’s endearing that Venti has tried to cook it—even though he has claimed that he’s not very good at cooking.
The egg is a little burnt around the corners, but Zhongli pays no mind to it as he eats it with the rice. He uses his free hand to scroll his phone, searching up for some websites with lists of April Fools’ jokes that he can use to (hopefully) entertain Venti tomorrow. Most of them are decent, but knowing how observant Venti is when it comes to him, he doubts it’ll work.
He decides to continue looking for April Fools’ jokes after a quick shower. Once he has climbed into bed—making sure not to disturb Venti’s sleep in the process—he uses his phone again to check out past pranks done by people through videos. Venti had installed for him this entertaining application called TikTok, where people upload short, hilarious or (sometimes) informative videos. He should be able to find something there.
He types out April Fools’ jokes for people who are in a relationship, and the top ones are those who prank their partner by pretending that they are leaving them—or having an affair. Most of the pranks are a failure because their partners quickly catch up to what’s actually going on, but Zhongli can see how much fun they are having when the other just plays along.
Hm, maybe he should try it himself—if Venti doesn’t have the energy to do this year’s April Fools. The joke is simple—he doesn’t even have to plan anything beforehand—and it doesn’t really matter if Venti quickly catches up with his intentions. The purpose of the joke is to just catch Venti off guard, even if it's momentarily. The video he’s currently watching has this person leaving his partner in shock for a split second, only for her to burst into laughter.
Watching the video again, he hopes that he can do the joke with Venti too. It’s a simple and possibly short one (depending on how fast Venti can detect that it is a joke). But at least he can do something different for once.
He goes to sleep in peace, knowing that he has a prank that he can use for Venti tomorrow.
He wants to have fun during April Fools too.
➳
Despite the lack of sleep Venti has gotten, it doesn’t stop him from pranking during April Fools.
At first, Zhongli has completely forgotten about the day, too occupied with the fact that it’s the weekend. That is, until he suddenly tastes the salt over his tongue after taking a bite of his sandwich. For a while, he keeps himself quiet, wondering if Venti has accidentally put the wrong ingredient or if this is one of his jokes. It turns out to be the latter when he hears the boy cackling from the kitchen, failing to stifle it.
“I should’ve known,” Zhongli says, throwing a deadpan glance at the culprit sitting across from him.
“You should’ve seen your face,” Venti laughs, his cheeks rosy and full of mirth. “I really thought I put too little, seeing how you weren’t saying anything.”
“I merely didn’t want to offend you,” Zhongli says, pretending to mope as he looks away. He takes a sip of his coffee. “Who knows, maybe you didn’t know how to cook a sandwich too.”
“Rude!” Venti huffs, poking his nose in the air. “I fully know how to make a sandwich, thank you very much. I may not be on par with you when it comes to cooking, but I do know some basic survival skills.”
Zhongli hides his smile as he drinks more from his mug of coffee. “Mhm.”
“For even thinking that I can’t make a sandwich, I’ll exchange it with a compliment just for you,” Venti says, which sounds highly suspicious when Zhongli has just practically insulted him. The boy leans closer, placing an elbow over the table. “You have quite a handsome face, Mr. Zhongli. Care to tell me how you got it?”
Zhongli places his mug on the table, blinking. Knowing Venti—especially on April Fools—there must be some kind of hidden meaning in his words. Because that compliment was out of the blue and unrelated to the topic they were discussing before, so he wonders why he—
He touches his face and notices the stain of black marker over his fingertips. Slowly, he flicks his gaze to the only person responsible, and Venti immediately gives away his mischief when he snorts, followed by a fit of giggles.
Zhongli can only shake his head as he opens his front camera to see the ‘art’ Venti has left on his face. There’s a pair of hand-drawn glasses around his eyes, and a moustache in between his nose and lips.
(Zhongli’s grateful that he has put his phone on mute, because it doesn’t make a sound as he snaps a photo of himself. Even though he looks absurd, he wants to keep Venti’s pranks as a memory.)
“Before you throw me off a cliff or something, the marker’s washable,” Venti says in between giggles. It takes quite some time before all the bubbling energy leaves him, and he exhales deeply as he leans back in his chair. “Man, I can’t believe you fell for it—twice today—for three years straight. It was the most common joke too!”
Zhongli feigns an irritated look. “If only you had let me take a shower first, I would’ve remembered it was April Fools.”
“One of the reasons why I didn’t. If you saw your reflection, the prank wouldn’t work,” Venti says, smiling a little. “But I guess it’s still considered a success—since you were sleeping the whole time while I drew on your face. I think I’m on a roll.”
Zhongli lets out a small grunt, the corners of his lips faintly twitching upwards. He grabs some tissues and heads over to the sink to wet them. He starts wiping his face, getting rid of the marker.
The place falls quiet while he cleans himself, and Zhongli’s about to look over his shoulder to see what Venti is doing. But then he hears the exhausted sigh, before Venti breaks the silence. “The project I’ve been working on was killing me, so this was just what I needed,” he says, almost inaudibly. There’s a slight pause, before he adds, “Which is why I love April Fools. This day is basically made for me to have fun.”
Ah, no wonder Venti has pranked him twice instead of once this year. It is to relieve the stress he has been feeling from work. It seems like now is a good time for Zhongli to execute the joke he learned from TikTok, since Venti sounds like he needs to have more fun. Knowing the boy and his occasional dramatic self, he’ll catch on pretty quick, but Zhongli will count his surprised expression as a win.
“Venti,” Zhongli says, making sure that his voice betrays none of his amusement. He can feel a smile tugging at his lips, but he forces himself to remain neutral as he turns around. “I’ve been thinking.”
He notices how the other has craned his neck from the dining table, looking at him curiously. “Yeah?”
One thing Venti has taught him when it comes to surprises is to build up the suspense, which is exactly what Zhongli is doing as he slowly makes his way to him. He pretends to let out a heavy sigh—adds a tiny hint of exaggeration so that he sounds fake enough. “I know this is sudden, but there is something we need to talk about.”
Venti’s brows furrow. It is to be expected, since Zhongli has never pranked him before (quote, Hu Tao). He’ll surely realise it soon. “Okay…”
Zhongli takes a deep breath, pauses so that Venti can come up with some ideas on what he’s going to talk about (which is the prank, in this case), before he exhales. “We should break up.”
“What?” Venti asks, visibly taken aback. A win for Zhongli already, but since he still looks confused, he doesn’t admit that it’s a joke yet. It takes a few seconds before he sees the smile on Venti’s face returning, and Zhongli misses the nervousness in his voice when he says, “Oh, I see. April Fools, right?”
Zhongli wants to tell him that he’s correct, but where’s the fun in that when Venti can pretend to play along with him? He doesn’t say anything, only steps away from Venti before spinning on his heel. “I have to go.”
He walks slow enough to allow Venti to catch up to him. This should be what Venti usually calls ‘dramatic’. Based on his calculations, his boyfriend should start laughing by now, running up to him and trying to stop—
There is no laughter, but he does feel Venti giving him an embrace from behind. He tilts his head to look at the boy, smiling at the fact that Venti has always been a hugger—
He almost has a heart attack when he sees Venti’s eyes glistening instead, the tears barely clinging at the corners.
“Why?” Venti asks. He has never sounded so broken before.
Zhongli stares, before his eyes widen. Oh... no. This joke doesn’t seem to be working as well as he had hoped for. Has he actually miscalculated?
He opens his mouth. “Venti—”
“Did—did I go too far with the pranks this time?”
Zhongli hastily shakes his head. “No, that’s not it.” Gently, he tries to pull Venti’s hands off from him so that he can turn around and properly face the boy, but it seems to have the opposite effect when he immediately feels him tightening his hold.
“I-I know I haven’t been a good partner,” Venti quickly says, frantic, as the tears begin to trickle down his cheeks. “You have to clean after my mess sometimes, I can barely cook us some food, and—and I know it can be difficult to deal with me—”
“Venti—”
“But I promise I can be better!” Venti exclaims, burying his face into his back. He continues to sob, his voice muffled when he softly adds, “I promise I’ll change. I’ll keep the house clean a-and learn how to cook better. Please. Please, just give me another chance. Don’t leave me, Zhongli.”
“Venti, I am not leaving you,” Zhongli says, and he finally feels the hold around his midsection loosen, followed by a sound of confusion. He turns around, and this time, he’s the one hugging Venti. He bends down to envelop his entire frame. “I’m sorry. None of the words I’d said were true. I was only trying to make an April Fools joke.”
“You... you were?” Venti asks, sniffling a little. He looks up with watery eyes.
Zhongli gives a small nod of his head. “I thought that if I could do an April Fools’ joke too, it would help you ease your mind off from work,” he says, giving him a remorseful look. “Now, I realise it was a grave mistake.”
Venti averts his gaze, wiping his snot with the sleeve of his shirt. “You blockhead,” he mutters, hiding his face into his shoulder. His braids sprawl against his chest, and he slowly returns his embrace with small hands. “You scared me.”
“I know, and I deeply apologise for that,” Zhongli says, and he plants kisses all over the top of Venti’s head as an apology. “You are already perfect for me, Venti. You don’t have to clean, know how to cook—or try to change any part of yourself. Because I love you just the way you are, so please do not devalue yourself ever again.”
Venti clutches the front of his shirt, letting out another sniff. “I love you, Zhongli.”
“I love you too, Venti.”
➳
“So let me get this straight,” Venti says, waving Zhongli’s phone in his hand. He seems to have some kind of death grip over his phone, seeing how his knuckles have turned white from the hold. “The prank you did—was actually from TikTok?”
“Yes,” Zhongli nods, and he scratches his head in bafflement. “I assumed it was a good joke, since it was listed as one of the top videos.”
“Archons,” Venti groans, using his free hand to rub his face. “Zhongli— you can’t trust TikTok videos! They’re the worst. No wonder you even thought of— TikTok videos just fill you with bad ideas!”
“Oh,” Zhongli says, and he watches as Venti slumps on the couch right next to him. “What should we do about it then?”
“The only thing left,” Venti says, and he presses the ‘delete’ button over a pop-up notification, before the application is gone. He then takes out his own phone, before he does the same. “There.”
Zhongli sighs. “It’s a shame that we must remove one of the sources of our entertainment,” he says, and he moves to lean back against the couch. “I was just familiarising myself with the application too.”
“Unfortunately, sacrifices must be made,” Venti says solemnly, staring at his now-no-TikTok phone. “For the greater good.”