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Quirks can be a curse.
Don't get her wrong, Toru is well aware that having a quirk, any quirk, trumps being quirkless by far. She is even just as painfully aware that her quirk leaves her much, much better off than so-called villainous or even most of the very weak quirks.
But one's pain doesn't take away from another's suffering.
Really, Toru should be used to this. She is always so easy to overlook, no matter how loud she makes her presence, no matter how much she moves her body. It doesn't matter because in the end her face is invisible and so are her arms and her legs. So yeah, she should be used to this.
Maybe, just maybe, UA has spoiled her a little. Maybe over the course of months, over the course of Ojiro talking to her like she matters, over the course of her teachers actually acknowledging her during class, she had decided that this would be different.
One moment shouldn't take away from the process.
But the heart wants what it wants and one of the perks of being invisible is that you can watch without being caught. So Toru doesn't really have to look away when Yaoyorozu turns and accidentally meets her eyes. She's looking through Toru of course, but she can pretend just fine and the eye contact sends giddy sparks up her spine.
She has been staring at Yaoyorozu like that for a while now. Has been admiring from a distance how the girl's long hair falls over her pale shoulders, how her lips quirked into a shy smile whenever someone compliments her and how she bites her pencils when she isn't immediately sure of an answer.
It's easy to get lost in the beauty that is Yaoyorozu.
Perhaps Toru should have flirted or let her intentions be known in any other way, but she doesn't know how to do that, so she didn't. Instead, she watches with a crumbling expression as Yaoyorozu goes up to Midoriya during lunch break and leans against his shoulders with the same shy smile Toru adores. And she watches with a falling feeling as the greenette wraps an arm around her and presses a soft kiss to her temples.
They're together after that.
It doesn't come as a surprise to most of them, but it does to Toru, because she's so used to floating at the peripheral of a group, that she didn't even make an effort to insert herself more clearly, even with the progress of UA.
She climbs out of her window and scales the dorms that day, one of her many talents nobody ever realizes she has, to go cry on the roof. Perhaps it is a little bit pathetic, but she needs to be alone, needs to be somewhere where she's sure she won't have to hide her crying. Not that it wouldn't be easy, all Toru ever has to do is not talk and she's good to go.
Her tears are invisible too, after all.
"What are you doing here, problem child?", Aizawa asks about half an hour into her cry session. He sounds entirely done and like he wants to be anywhere but here, deep circles under his dark eyes and a deadpan expression on his face as he peers at her. She honestly isn't quite sure where he came from, but he is an Underground hero, just like she'll be one day, and she doesn't question it much.
Instead of answering, she draws her arms around her knees and desperately hugs herself
Her sensei sighs, before moving to sit down next to her, close enough to talk quietly and comfortably, but far enough to give her space. "Would you like to talk about it, Hagakure?", he asks in the tone he usually uses when he's being entirely genuine, even if he'd rather not be.
Despite herself, the tone makes her smile. "It's dumb", she hiccups. He clearly already noticed her distress so there really isn't any reason to hide that she's been crying.
"I doubt that", he replies easily and it's in moments like this that she sees how this anti-social man who frankly seems like he hates children most of the time became a teacher. "And even if it was, the fact that it made you come out here and cry at this hour means it is important regardless."
Toru shrugs, even if she knows it isn't really visible with the way she has an oversized, fluffy jacket slung over her shoulders. "You know, my expression is often like yours", she states and briefly there is surprise in his eyes. It makes her weirdly proud to have made him react, even if she knows what she'd said really was rather random.
Aizawa hums. "I see", he replies, but she would bet good money that he has no actual clue as to why she said it.
"It seems unnecessary to make facial expressions when nobody's going to see it anyway", she clarifies and this time, Aizawa looks much more understanding. "Do you struggle remembering I exist?", she asks in a very small voice.
The man's eyebrow lifts a fraction. "I don't. Is this about your quirk? Has someone been ignoring you?"
She shrugs again, more exaggerated this time until she feels the jacket move. It really is dumb that she's out here, that she's relating this to her invisibility when really Yaoyorozu remembers her presence just fine. Toru just isn't her type, Midoriya is and that should be fine, should be a fact that exists independently from her quirk.
It isn't fine though and it doesn't help with her insecurities.
"Not anymore", she replies softly and despite her normal ease of controlling her voice, it comes out entirely more bitter than she wanted it to. Damn. It is whatever though, it isn't like she's about to lay out her entire backstory, how her parents have seven children and only one is invisible or how her classmates at middle school used to walk into her to make a cruel point.
"It's not okay that anyone ever made you feel that way", Aizawa assures her and it makes her heart warm, even if she still feels like shit about bothering him with her problems in the first place. About bothering him about things that weren't even the issue right now. "And it's not your fault", he adds and then she can't see anymore because she's crying again, silent sobs that don't even make her jacket shake.
She isn't sure how he can tell she's crying again or how he knows where her hand is, but he carefully reaches out and rests his own calloused one on her invisible one. A silent comfort. It helps.
"I know", she eventually says, her voice making her wince. She does know. People are born with their quirks after all or at least with the potential of them and it isn't little turquoise-haired Toru's fault that she turned invisible on her third birthday, never to be seen again. She sometimes wonders if her hair still looks the same. "It's-..." She trails off.
Aizawa doesn't push her to talk, simply waiting in silence, blinking sleepily from time to time.
"I guess I just have an issue right now that triggered my insecurities", she admits, using the words she knows Hound Dog will undoubtedly use in their next session. She has been seeing the man ever since the summer camp disaster and he has already helped her a ton.
"Would you like to talk about the issue?", he asks and despite his serious tone and her eyes feeling puffy from crying, she can't help but snicker at the question.
"Thanks, sensei, but I'm sure you don't want to listen to my opinion on Yaoyorozu dating Midoriya", she replies with a small giggle, the whole thing suddenly feeling ridiculously funny. The man grimaces slightly, even if he tries to hide it, and she giggles again.
"Very considerate", he says stiffly, but there is a spark of amusement in his eyes, so she isn't too worried.
"Thanks", she says after a while. "For listening to me."
"Of course", he replies. "That's my job. Besides, you're my problem children, so I like knowing what makes you upset." It's surprisingly open and genuine.
"Sensei", she says softly as they stand to go back down. "Could I-... I mean, if you don't mind, uhm, could I have a hug, maybe, please?" She waits for his judgment with bated breath, nervousness making her feel slightly sick.
"Sure", he says easily and opens his arms.
Perhaps she isn't getting what she wants. And perhaps she has some issues with her quirk still. And perhaps, just perhaps, her jealousy over Midoriya getting to Yaoyorozu first hasn't diminished in the slightest, despite her crying fit.
But being hugged for the first time in a long time, by someone she sees as an important adult figure in her life, feels like a good enough consolation prize for the moment.
Love sucks though.
Like seriously.