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Megumi’s feet ached and his arms were sore, his shoulders weighed down by all of Kugisaki’s shopping bags. He had regretted letting her and Itadori drag him shopping the moment they left campus, but he was too tired to be annoyed about it now. He just wanted to get back to his room and curl up in his bed.
They were still almost an hour away from campus, but Megumi sighed in relief when the train station came into sight. He was eager to at least get off of his feet and drop some of Kugisaki’s bags. There was only one street between them and the station, and they just had to wait for the light to change so they could cross. He readjusted all the bags he was holding so that his hands were free and then he offered his empty hands to Itadori and Kugisaki. But neither of them grabbed his hand, giving him weird looks instead.
“What are you doing?” Kugisaki lowered her sunglasses as she asked, looking at Megumi over the top of them in a way that reminded him of Gojo. There was an odd inflection in her question, like she was getting ready to tease him.
“You’re supposed to hold hands when you cross the street.” Megumi said it without thinking, the words so ingrained in him with how often Gojo had said them when he was younger. But he immediately regretted saying them as Kugisaki laughed loudly.
“Yeah maybe if you’re five years old or something.” Kugisaki was still laughing as she spoke, and her smile was the sharp, wild one she usually had while facing off against curses. Megumi knew he should just drop it, his ears feeling hot as he was already embarrassed enough, but there was something pushing him to defend himself from her teasing.
“Gojo Sensei—”
“ Gojo Sensei holds your hand?!” Kugisaki let out a loud, bark-like laugh, and her smile looked sharper than before. Megumi hunched in on himself, trying to use his shoulders to hide the way his blush was spreading down his neck. “Does he also give you appley juice and put you down for nap time?” Megumi hunched in on himself even further, wishing he had never mentioned Gojo in the first place. He looked over at Itadori, hoping his friend would help him out, but he was just looking at Megumi with a dopey sort of smile, like Megumi was a little kid or something.
“I think it’s kind of nice that Gojo Sensei still takes care of you, Fushiguro.” Itadori’s voice was gentle, his words obviously intended to soothe Megumi’s embarrassment, but they only made him feel worse. They reminded him that he wasn’t strong enough to do anything on his own, that he always needed Gojo to swoop in and save him. The light still hadn’t changed, but Megumi took a step into the street anyway, wanting to escape his friends and their teasing.
“Wait, aren't you forgetting something, Fushiguro?” Kugisaki grabbed his hand as she asked, digging her nails into him when he tried to yank himself free. Then she pulled him across the street, childishly swinging their linked hands as they moved.
Megumi spent the entire train ride trying to ignore Kugisaki, who was still teasing him mercilessly. He also tried to ignore all the texts he was getting from Gojo as he was annoyed with the older man, who was the whole reason Kugisaki was teasing him in the first place. Megumi felt oddly disappointed with everything too, though he refused to let himself pick apart why he was disappointed. Instead he just closed his eyes and pretended to sleep, hoping that might somehow make the ride home go faster.
For the first time in a long time almost all of the first and second years were on campus together, no one out on a mission and no one pretending to be dead. Megumi felt bad that Okkotsu wasn’t with them too, sure the older boy would’ve liked spending time with everyone, but it wasn’t enough to ruin his own good mood. It was nice just hanging out together and pretending like they were normal kids at a normal high school. Even Gojo was in a good mood, the cloud that had been hanging over him since the exchange event finally gone. He even offered to treat them all to dinner at the sushi place Maki and Kugisaki had been begging to go to for weeks.
The restaurant wasn’t far from campus and the weather was still nice, so they decided to walk even though it would’ve been faster to take the bus. They broke off into smaller groups as they walked, and Megumi fell into step with Gojo without even thinking about it. The older man immediately launched into a story about the last mission he had been on, gesticulating wildly with his hands as he spoke. Megumi felt a warmth in chest at the familiarity of Gojo at his side like this, reminding him of simpler times when Gojo used to walk him and Tsumiki home from school. But Tsumiki’s absence reminded him just how different everything was now, how nothing was ever going to be simple again.
Megumi hadn’t really been paying attention as to where they were walking, instead just following Gojo’s lead. But then he became overly conscious of where they were as they stopped at the edge of a busy road, needing to wait for the light to change before they could cross. Gojo immediately held his hand out to Megumi, a wordless invitation for him to grab it. Megumi reached out on instinct, his body moving without him needing to think at all, but then he stopped just before his hand would’ve touched Gojo's, suddenly aware of the way everyone was watching him. He quickly shoved his hands into his pockets and tried to ignore the way Gojo’s smile dimmed. He hoped no one would say anything, but Megumi wasn’t that lucky. He groaned as Kugisaki and Inumaki surrounded him with identical, mischievous smiles.
“Aw, are you a big boy now, Fushiguro? Don’t need anyone to help you cross the street anymore?” Kugisaki tried to pull Megumi’s hand out of his pocket as she teased him, but he just hunched in on himself and twisted away from her.
“Fuck off, Kugisaki.” Megumi’s voice was gruff and awkward, and his ears felt hot. Kugisaki let out an affected, offended gasp, but it was drowned out by Maki’s snorting laughter.
“Sujiko.” There was laughter in Inumaki’s voice, and he was trying to pull Megumi’s other hand free. He was still laughing even as Megumi knocked his shoulder against him hard enough to push him away.
“You can fuck off too.” Megumi’s ears felt even hotter, and he was overly conscious of the way Gojo was looking at him, even with the older man’s blindfold in the way.
“How come you don’t try to hold our hands when we cross the street? Do you like Megumi better than the rest of us or something?” The way Maki asked made it obvious that she didn’t really want an answer, only saying it to make Megumi’s embarrassment worse. Gojo considered the question anyway—a flash of curiosity and then understanding quickly crossing his face before he smiled obnoxiously.
“And here I thought that most of my precious students didn’t like me.” Gojo grabbed one of Maki’s hands and one of Kugisaki’s, holding on tightly as the girls tried to yank themselves free. “I should’ve known you guys were just shy. I mean I am the best at everything ever and an amazing teacher.”
“You’re an idiot.” Maki sounded annoyed, still trying to free her hand even though it was futile. Gojo pouted childishly at her barb.
“Megumi, tell Maki to stop being so mean to me.” Gojo’s voice was whiny, but Megumi was sure that the older man’s eyes were shining with mirth under his blindfold. This was familiar too, reminding Megumi of all the times Gojo used to bring him to campus before he was officially a student. But the familiarity wasn’t enough to outweigh his embarrassment, especially as everyone was looking at him again. So he just scowled at Gojo, feeling guilty as the older man’s smile fell a little.
“Hurry up, the light’s already changed.” Kugisaki was already trying to drag Gojo into the street, obviously impatient to get to the restaurant. Gojo let her move him, his smile already back in place as if Megumi’s scowl hadn’t affected him at all. They pulled Maki along with them too, though she didn't’ really have much of a choice especially as she had finally given up on trying to free her hand. Inumaki and Panda followed them closely, laughing at Maki’s defeated expression. Megumi hung back with Itadori and waited until everyone else was most of the way across the intersection before crossing.
“I can hold your hand if that’s what you want, Fushiguro Megumi.” Megumi startled at Sukuna’s voice, not expecting the curse to say anything. Sukuna had formed a mouth on Itadori’s cheek and was smiling at Megumi with all of his sharp teeth. His smile didn’t last long as Itadori quickly slapped a hand onto his cheek and hid it from sight, but it was there long enough to unsettle Megumi.
“Sorry Fushiguro.” Itadori sounded genuinely remorseful, like he wished he had better control of the curse, but Megumi just waved him off with something that probably looked closer to a grimace than a smile.
“It’s fine.” Megumi looked away from the other boy, not wanting to accidentally encourage Sukuna to do anything else, but then his stomach sank as his eyes met Gojo’s blindfold. There was an almost unnoticeable tenseness under Gojo’s skin, and Megumi knew it was because he was ready to jump in between Megumi and Sukuna in case the curse took control of Itadori’s body. Megumi grit his teeth at the painful reminder that Gojo didn't think he could take care of himself and dropped his gaze to his own feet. He just wanted to get the rest of the night over with and sit in his room feeling sorry for himself.
Dinner was actually almost fun. No one teased Megumi, Sukuna stayed silent and out of sight, and the sushi was some of the best Megumi had ever had. But he couldn’t relax, overly aware of the way Gojo was watching him, feeling picked apart even with the blindfold in the way. Megumi tried to ignore Gojo, instead talking with his classmates and pretending like he didn’t notice the older man, but Gojo was a hard person to ignore. Gojo wasn’t even really doing anything, just sitting there and eating his sushi, but Megumi had trouble focusing on anything else.
Megumi broke away from the group as soon as they got back to campus and quickly snuck towards his room. He wanted to avoid Gojo, hoping that the older man would just forget all about what happened earlier. But he wasn’t surprised when there was a knock on his door only moments after he closed it. Megumi sighed to himself as he opened the door, preparing to tell Gojo that everything was fine.
Megumi’s breath caught in his throat as his eyes met Gojo’s, the older man’s blindfold hanging around his neck. Looking into Gojo’s eyes always made him feel like he was falling through the sky, and he had never gotten used to the feeling, even after all their years together. Gojo didn’t wait for Megumi to invite him in, walking into the room like he had every right to be there. His obnoxious smile from before was gone now that he was alone with Megumi, and something about that made him seem older than he was.
“What’s wrong, Megumi?” Gojo’s question was gentle, and he was looking at Megumi like he really wanted to know the answer. Megumi had intended to tell him that everything was fine, feeling childish for getting so upset about it in the first place. But his intentions unraveled under Gojo’s six eyes.
“Do you think I can’t take care of myself or something?” Megumi’s question sounded more defensive than he intended, but it was too late to take the words back. Gojo blinked in surprise, obviously not expecting Megumi to answer with a question of his own.
“What are you talking about? Obviously I know you can take care of yourself. I mean you were practically raising yourself when I met you.” Gojo sounded as confused as he looked and he was squinting at Megumi like he was trying to discover a hidden meaning behind the question. He took a step closer to Megumi, but Megumi just took one back, already feeling crowded just being in the same room as Gojo.
“Then why are you always treating me like I’m still a kid?” Megumi couldn’t meet Gojo’s eyes as he spoke, upset with himself for even asking. But now that he started talking about this he couldn’t seem to stop, seemingly just wanting to torture himself. Gojo looked more confused than before, but just took another step closer to Megumi. Megumi tried to take another step back, but he stumbled, tripping over a pair of shoes he had forgotten about. Gojo caught his arm before he could fall, but that only made Megumi feel worse, like he really couldn’t take care of himself without Gojo’s help.
“I don’t treat you like a kid, Megumi.” Gojo sounded like he really meant it, and Megumi wanted to believe him, but he couldn’t. He yanked his arm free and tried to take a step back again, managing it that time.
“Yes you do. You’re always dropping in to check on me. And getting in the middle of my fights. And you still hold my hand when we cross the street like I’m five years old or something. And–” Megumi cut himself off as Gojo started to laugh. He scowled at the older man and tried to ignore the painful feeling in his chest.
“So that’s what this is all about.” Megumi’s scowl deepened as Gojo teased him.
“It’s not funny.” Megumi was embarrassed at the obvious hurt in his voice, but he couldn’t hide it, not now that he knew Gojo really did still see him as a kid. Gojo’s expression softened, and Megumi could almost swear he could see something like longing in it.
“I know it’s not funny, Megumi. I just…I still hold your hand when we cross the street just so I can have an excuse to hold it at all.” Gojo sounded genuine enough, but Megumi faltered at his words, unable to believe that Gojo had really said them.
“What do you mean?” The hurt was gone from Megumi’s voice, replaced by a hopefulness he wished he didn’t feel, knowing he was only going to be disappointed. Gojo took another step forward, but Megumi stayed where he was that time, tilting his head back just a little to keep his eyes on Gojo’s face.
“I mean I want to hold your hand even though I know I shouldn't.” The longing was clearer in Gojo’s expression now, and it looked like he wanted to grab Megumi’s hand, but his arms stayed by his sides.
“Who says you shouldn’t?” Megumi wasn’t sure why he was suddenly whispering, but it felt right. Reaching out for Gojo felt right too, so he did, grabbing the older man’s hand without even thinking about Gojo’s infinity at all. Gojo immediately laced their fingers together, a small, sad-sort of smile playing across his lips.
“No one, but it’s not right.” Gojo’s forehead creased as he frowned. “It’s not right how I feel about you.” It sounded like Gojo was trying to convince himself, but that didn’t matter to Megumi. All that mattered was the hope in his chest which suddenly felt more insistent.
“And how do you feel about me?” Megumi’s voice was quieter than before, and he wanted Gojo to lean closer to try and hear him better. But Gojo stayed where he was without answering Megumi’s question. Megumi considered dropping his question along with Gojo’s hand, but there was something in the way that Gojo was looking at him which pushed Megumi to keep trying. So Megumi took a step forward, almost stepping on Gojo’s feet, and tilted his head back even further. “How do you feel about me, Sensei?” Gojo still didn’t answer, but he didn’t need to. Megumi could see his answer in the way his eyes dropped to Megumi’s lips and could hear it in the way his breathing audibly caught in his throat. Gojo tightened his grip on Megumi’s hand, forcibly keeping himself from taking what he wanted. So, for the first time in his life, Megumi decided to be the selfish one, taking what he wanted, what he had always wanted.
They were standing so close together that Megumi could already feel Gojo’s breath on his face, but he still had to shift onto his toes to kiss Gojo. He hesitated just before their lips would’ve touched, knowing that kissing Gojo would change everything, but he wanted everything to change, so he killed the small distance between them and kissed him. Gojo immediately kissed back, bringing his other hand to Megumi’s waist to pull him even closer. The kiss was desperate, and it was everything Megumi had always wanted.
It felt like they had been kissing for hours but also only for seconds when they finally broke apart. They stayed close together, their hands still twined together and Gojo breathing against Megumi’s lips. Something settled in Megumi’s chest as they stood together, and it felt like he was finally where he was supposed to be.
“So how do you feel about me?” Megumi didn’t need to ask, not after their kiss, but he did anyway, curious as to what Gojo would say now. Gojo laughed against his lips, and the sound was fond and familiar. Then he kissed Megumi again and it was the only answer he really needed.