Chapter Text
He thought it was one of those dreams, at first. The sound of Five’s spatial jump, the blue light, and there Five was standing over his bed.
Just like old times and looking exactly the same as the day he’d left.
Ben smiled up at Five and made space in the bed, opening his arms for a hug. Instead of lying down, Five pulled on his hand and insistently tugged him out of bed whispering, “Wake up, Ben, you have to wake up now.”
“Five?” Ben mumbled. “Is that really you?”
“Yes,” Five whispered. “Keep your voice down, alright? I don’t want to wake anyone else.”
Fully awake now, Ben hugged him. “Five! Where have you-”
“Shhh!” Five looked scared. “Please, Ben, you have to whisper."
Ben pulled back to get a better look at him. Five was so short, now. He still looked thirteen.
“You really did it,” Ben whispered. “You time traveled.”
“Yes,” Five said. “I’m sorry.”
The poor kid looked so nervous. Did he think Dad would punish him or something?
“It’s okay, Five.” Ben kept his voice low for Five’s peace of mind. “Dad will forgive you. I bet he’ll even be impressed.”
“I’m not worried about Dad,” Five said. “I’m worried about you. Well, and the timeline.”
“The timeline?”
Five sighed. “The future was a mess, Ben. You have no idea. And I tried to fix it, but I made things worse and then I had to fix that and... but we don’t have time right now.”
“What do you mean, Five?”
“I hate to do this to you.” Five ran a hand through his hair and Ben realized his brother’s hand was trembling. “I tried to find a better way, I really did, but there were too many factors, too much chaos, and… and we don’t have time.”
Ben sat back down on the bed and patted the spot beside him. “There’s some time, isn’t there? Take a little breather.”
With obvious reluctance, Five sat down. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I’m so sorry.”
“It’s okay.” Ben put an arm around Five’s shoulder. It was something Five had done for him so many times when they were younger. “You don’t have to be sorry, Five.”
“I do,” Five said. “I do.”
“No-”
“Ben, you died.” Five sprang up out of Ben’s hold like a live wire and started pacing around the room. “Shit,” he whispered fiercely, rubbing at his eyes. “I’ve never had any goddamned tact.”
Ben gulped. “It’s… it’s okay.”
Five pressed his hands against his eyeballs as if he could physically stop his own tears. It was one of those habits Ben had always found endearing, but right now it was just heartbreaking.
Ben felt like he should be crying too, but the tears just weren’t coming. Was he in shock?
He watched Five wrestle with his emotions in silence for a minute and was startled when Five glared at him and said, at a normal volume, “So I’m here to save you.”
Ben blinked.
Five winced and glanced at the door, as if saying the words so loudly would bring calamity bearing down on them.
But nothing like that happened and Five relaxed.
“I’m going to save you,” Five whispered. “But there’s a price.”
“What kind of price?”
“You have to come with me to the future,” Five said. “Almost fourteen years forward.”
That was hard to wrap his head around. It was weird enough talking to a brother from four years in the past, but fourteen years? The future?
“Why fourteen?”
“I wish I could explain it to you,” Five said. “You deserve a full explanation and time to think it through. Ben, you deserve a choice. I know you do, but…”
“But there isn’t time?” Ben said.
Five nodded. “There isn’t time.”
Ben took a deep breath. “Alright.”
“Alright?”
“I trust you.”
Five hugged him. “Thank you.”
Once again Ben marveled at how small Five was. It made him feel protective.
I’m never letting him out of my sight again, Ben thought.
“There’s just one thing,” Ben said. “What am I going to tell everyone? We have to come up with some excuse, don’t we?”
Five shook his head. “We’re not telling them anything.”
“But I can’t just disappear,” Ben said. “I know what that’s like. It’ll drive them crazy with worry and-”
“They won’t remember,” Five said. “It won’t be like that.”
“Why wouldn’t they remember?” Ben said.
Five pulled away from the hug and looked at his watch, clearly stressed, but he took the time to answer. “Have you heard of the Mandella effect?”
“Um, no.”
“Well, it’s sort of like… to a time traveler- well.” Five’s nose crinkled as he thought. “Put simply, they’ll only remember their native timeline. They’ll remember your death, instead of your disappearance.”
Ben winced. “Oh…”
“I wish they’d remember the new version of events,” Five said. “But since they won’t, we don’t have to worry about explaining anything to them. And it’s better if we don’t because we’re trying to minimize the damage.”
“The damage?”
“Of changing the timeline.”
“Right, right.” Ben chuckled. “That’s hard to wrap my head around.”
“You’ll have to wrap your head around it later,” Five said. “We’re out of time.”
“Okay,” Ben said. “Let’s go.”
Five turned away from him and fumbled in the dim lighting. “Where did I put it?”
“Put what?”
“Nevermind, I found it.” Five lifted a business briefcase onto the bed and messed with what looked like one of those password locks. “Come closer, Ben. Wait! Put your shoes on.”
Ben rushed to get his shoes on, pulse racing. “Why the briefcase?”
“It makes it easier,” Five said. “In a pinch I can jump through time without it, but I can’t easily control when I’ll turn up. Anyway, are you ready?”
“I’m ready.”
Five opened the briefcase. There was a flash of blue light and then harsh sunlight directly overhead. Ben squinted around him. “Whoa.”
“Now we have plenty of time.” Five laughed. “Well, relatively.”
Blinking the white spots away from his vision, Ben realized they were standing outside the gate to The Umbrella Academy. The building looked basically the same. If it weren’t for the sunlight Ben would have thought Five had just warped them outside.
“Let’s go for a walk, shall we?” Five said. “Before you meet the others I’d like to explain some things.”
“Okay,” Ben said. “That… yeah. Sounds good.”
“But you look thirteen.”
“I know.”
“You’re exactly the same.”
“I know it seems that way.”
They were walking around the perimeter of a nearby park. In the sunlight Ben could see that Five was wearing black dress shoes, dress pants, and a green button up shirt. The shirt was short sleeved and kind of pulled in at the waist and the overall effect was half slick businessman and half Christian Youth of America.
Ben himself was still wearing the Umbrella Academy issued pajamas and he felt self conscious as they walked, but didn’t want to go home yet.
He hadn’t seen Five in four years. And for Five it had apparently been a lot longer than that.
“There’s another hiccup,” Five said. “There are two of me.”
“What? Like you got cloned?”
“No,” Five said. “He’s the actual thirteen year old. The one who ran away in 2002.”
“What does that mean for you?”
Five shrugged. “It means I can’t live in New York anymore.”
"What? Why not?”
“It’s called Paradox Psychosis.” Five held his hands up against each other. “When two copies of the same person exist in the same year they repel each other. I think it’s Time’s way of trying to fix itself.”
He entwined his fingers together. “If the doppelgangers insist on interacting despite the symptoms, well…” Five mimed an explosion. “They’ll self-destruct.”
“Literally self destruct?!”
“No, they’ll kill each other,” Five said. “Homicidal rage is the last stage of Paradox Psychosis. At least one of the doppelgangers must die for the other to exist without disturbing Time. It’s instinct.”
“But if you can’t stay in New York where will you go?”
“Allison lives in California now,” Five said. “I’ll stay with her for the time being.”
“Can I go with you?”
Five shook his head. “Everyone has missed you. And Allison will visit whenever she can-”
“But I just got you back.”
“You’ll still have me, technically.” Five gave him a wry smile. “He’ll be the Five you missed. In a lot of ways, the real one.”
Ben stopped walking and Five paused, considering him.
"What is it?” Five said.
“I kind of don’t believe you,” Ben said. “You can’t be fifty eight.”
“But I am.”
Ben put a hand on Five’s head. “But you’re exactly the same as I remember you.” He sounded desperate to his own ears, but Ben didn’t care. “Please, you can’t just… you can’t just leave.”
Five took Ben’s hand in his own. “You can visit me in California as often as Allison visits you here. Does that sound alright?”
“I guess so,” Ben mumbled. “But-”
“No buts,” Five said. “I think it’s time for you to go home now.”
Watching Five disappear again was like watching a dog get run over. Ben had to stop himself from running forward to stop him.
Five casually waved goodbye before opening the briefcase. Acting as if he was just walking off to the store instead of teleporting halfway across the country.
He’d said there was a second Five in the house with a thirty year old Klaus, but as soon as Five was gone Ben started to panic. What if Five was lying? What if he’d only said that so he could leave again without Ben putting a stop to it?
Ben stormed through the gates of the Academy and tried to pry the door open, but it was locked.
He banged on it. “Hey! Let me in!”
When nothing happened, Ben kicked it.
“HEY!”
Finally, the door opened.
“Sweetie,” Mom said. “It’s so good to see you.”
She looked exactly the same. Again, Ben doubted he was really in the future. But of course she looked the same. Mom didn’t age.
“Uh, hey, Mom. Sorry about the...” Ben gestured at the door.
“That’s quite alright,” Mom said. “You’re in a hurry to see your brothers, aren’t you?”
She led him into the house. “I think Klaus is still asleep,” Mom said. “But Five is up. You’ll find him in his room.”
“Klaus is asleep? What time is it?”
“It’s just past four o’clock,” Mom said. “That boy keeps odd hours, I know.”
“Boy?” Ben said. “Five said he was thirty now.”
“Closer to thirty three, I think.” Mom laughed lightly. “But all of my children will always be children to me.”
She cupped Ben’s cheeks, smiling brightly.
“And you’re seventeen, is that right?”
“Yeah.” Ben fidgeted in her grasp. “Is it weird?”
“Not at all,” Mom said. “We’ve all missed you.”
She let go of his cheeks, but put her hands on his shoulders, rubbing her thumb against him in a familiar soothing gesture.
“This must seem so confusing,” Mom said. “Do you have any questions?”
“I think Five answered most of them,” Ben said. “Like, he said Luther and Klaus are the only ones living at the Academy right now. Besides the, uh, younger Five.”
Ben paused, half expecting Mom to deny young Five’s existence. But she’d said Five was in his room, hadn’t she?
“That’s right,” Mom said. “But Luther is in California right now.”
“Right, with Allison,” Ben said. “And they’re both coming back later?”
“Yes,” Mom said. “Diego was also staying here for a few days. He’s not here right now, but he’ll be back soon. And Vanya will visit too, of course.”
“And Pogo and Dad are dead,” Ben finished. “Five said he couldn’t save them the way he saved me.”
“I’m afraid not, dear.”
Ben nodded to himself, taking a deep breath.
“I’m going to go see Five.”
“Alright,” Mom said. “And you’ll let me know if you need anything?”
“Yeah,” Ben said. “Um, I’m a little hungry actually.”
Mom grinned. “I’ll get started on lunch.”
“Thanks Mom,” Ben said.
“I love you, dear,” Mom said. “I think you already know that, but we’ve been making a habit of saying so more often around here.”
“Oh,” Ben said. “Thanks. I mean, I love you too.”
Mom smiled. “Go on now. Five is eager to see you.”
Ben stood outside Five’s old bedroom door and hesitated. This whole thing was so weird. Two versions of Five?! And one of them was an old man in a child’s body? It was like the time he’d tried mushrooms with Klaus and thought he could visualize his body in ten different places at once.
It had felt real, but it was just a weird trip.
Maybe I’m still dreaming, Ben thought. I’ll wake up soon and laugh at myself. Five will still be gone…
Ben shook his head. There was no point thinking like that.
He knocked.
“Go away!” Five shouted. “Leave me alone!”
Ben huffed. That was not the reaction he’d been expecting.
“Um, I’m sorry,” Ben said. “I just wanted to say hi?”
A flash of blue light and Five was in front of him.
"Ben?!”
“Hi,” Ben said. “Do you still want me to go away?”
Five gaped at him. “I thought you were Klaus. Usually, as soon as he wakes up… but how are you here?"
“The other Five brought me here from 2006,” Ben said. “This is 2019 right?”
Five threw his hands up. “No one told me he was going to do that today!”
Ben laughed. “I’m sorry?”
Five stared at him. He looked oddly frustrated. “Did you… are you… you’re here to stay?”
“I thought so,” Ben said. “What about you?”
Five blinked. “What about me?”
“Are you here to stay?” Ben said. “Cause I really, really missed you.”
The other Five had wasted no time reaching out for a hug, but this version stood stiffly, eying Ben as if he half expected The Horror to jump out and bite him. Ben wondered if he’d done something wrong.
Wait, or did Ben hug the other Five first? Did Five need him to make the first move?
“I missed you too,” Five said. “When I found out you were dead…”
Five huffed and covered his eyes with his hands. He wasn’t crying, but it seemed like he was worried that maybe he was about to.
“I’m sorry I scared you,” Ben said. “I’m sorry that happened.”
Five had always been reserved about affection, Ben realized. And afraid to show his emotions. Though that applied to the whole family, didn’t it? Because Dad discouraged “emotional displays.”
So Five stood there with his hands over his eyes and tried to compose himself.
“Emotion begets weakness!” Dad would say.
Fuck that, Ben thought.
He pulled Five into a hug. “I love you,” Ben said.
“I love you too,” Five mumbled.
“I’m glad we’re together again,” Ben said.
“I’m glad you’re alive.”
Ben laughed. “I’m glad I’m alive too.” Then, “Dammit! I forgot to tell the other Five I loved him!”
Five snorted. “He knows that.”
“But I should’ve said so,” Ben said. “Mom says everyone is trying to say it more often.”
“Words don’t matter,” Five said. "Actions matter.”
Ben ruffled his hair. “I think both matter, dude.”
Five harrumphed. “Whatever.”
That was such a pre-teen response! Ben grinned. “I can’t believe I’m a big brother now.”
“Shut up,” Five said. “Just wait until Klaus wakes up. You’re also a little brother.”
“Oh my gosh,” Ben said. “I’m the middle child? Is that it?”
“Yup,” Five said. “But we’ve still got a group birthday. It’s next week.”
"Wow,” Ben said. “That’s going to be quite a party. Dad’s not around to yell at us about propriety anymore, so I can just imagine how wild the guys are gonna get.”
“Vanya is wild too, these days. Did you hear she’s got powers?”
“I did hear about that,” Ben said. “Something about sound waves?”
“There’s more to it than that. From what I’ve seen…”
In typical Five fashion, his brother launched into a lecture. Ben tried to open the door to his bedroom so they could sit down while he talked, but the door was locked. So Five paused, warped to the other side of the door, and opened it. Then he continued talking as if nothing had happened.
“She also said she accidentally gave someone her powers once,” Five said. “And I tried to talk her into giving them to me, but she refused!”
“The nerve,” Ben teased.
“I’ll wear her down,” Five said. “Just watch, and then I’ll…”
Ben had trouble staying focused on Five’s ranting. His bedroom walls were covered in equations from floor to ceiling and the whole thing took Ben’s breath away. It looked like years of work.
But he sat down and waited for Five to pause for breath before he asked, “What’s all this for?”
“It was for you,” Five said. “Not my work though. The other Five.”
“For me?”
“Yeah,” Five said. “You know. The timeline is really delicate, apparently.”
The other Five had said as much and he’d described the moon exploding, the world ending, and everyone dying a tragic death.
Ben shivered.
“You did a good job,” Ben said.
Five huffed. “It wasn’t me. The other Five beat me to it!”
“But you’re going to grow up to become him, right? So in a way, it was you.”
Five rolled his eyes. “It still wasn’t me.”
Ben held his hands out. “Well, I didn’t contribute anything either.”
“So?”
“So I feel bad,” Ben said. “That he had to go through all that alone and I couldn’t help him.”
“That’s stupid,” Five said. “The whole mess was out of your hands.”
“I guess so,” Ben agreed. “I still feel bad though.”
“Do you… do you think you’ll have nightmares?”
Ben frowned. It seemed like such a random question. But then he remembered: after their first mission Ben had confessed to Five that he was having nightmares.
“No choice, then,” Five had said. “I’ll have to fight them off.”
“You can’t fight dreams,” Ben had said.
“Can too,” Five had retorted. “Just watch me.”
And Five had teleported into his room that night. Without a word, he’d crawled into Ben’s bed and put an arm protectively around him. As if to say, they’ll have to get through me first.
Ben smiled at the memory.
“I’m definitely going to have nightmares,” Ben said. “Lots of nightmares.”
Five nodded tersly. “Understood.”
It was such a simple word, but it warmed Ben’s heart. To think he could have this back so easily. It didn’t feel real.
“Thanks,” Ben said. “Five, I really love you.”
Five rolled his eyes. “You already said that.”
“I’ll say it as many times as I want,” Ben teased.
“Well, I guess I can’t stop you,” Five said. “So whatever. I love you too.”