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Dick’s mind whirled even as he downed the medicine like the shots that Wally and Roy used to dare him to do. It tasted three times as bad as the alcohol that Wally had tried to make himself in a discarded bathtub in the middle of the woods, but reflex had him swallowing it down all the same.
Maybe whatever the doctor had prescribed him for the pain would kill him before Dick had to deal with the fact that he had APPARENTLY been courting the deadliest pirate captain on the seas for the last -
“How long have we been courting for?” Dick asked suddenly.
Slade’s one blue eye looked at him shrewdly. “Ten months. Should’ve only been eight, but the herb the short one needed took a month longer than what it should’ve to get - and then I had to go and get Rose out of the mess she got herself into, which took the other month.”
“Right, right, courting for eight months for the eight gifts - that'd be the usual right.” Dick bobbed his head.
- ten months. Who even got courted and didn’t know it for one month? And Dick had managed to get himself courted while being oblivious to it for ten whole fricking months?!
Jason was never going to let him live this down. Neither -
“Wait wait waitwaitwaitwait - YOU’RE the reason why Damian showed up from school with what Tim needed?” Dick interrupted himself again. "Damian refused to say anything about it at all, and we never really pushed because it was exactly what we needed. We thought Talia had given it to him without Ra's knowing and that's why he was hiding it."
“Grayson, again - I don’t remember all of your hell-born siblings. Your father seems to collect them like -”
“You collect scars.” Wintergreen didn’t seem phased by their growling as he entered the small room, carrying a heavily loaded tray of foods. Almost serenely, the beta ambled into the room even as Slade’s snarl grew louder. He stopped and turned his scent to something more soothing and calming when Dick hunkered away from him. “Captain Nightwing. Your crew reached land and is awaiting your father to send them another ship so that they may return to your city.”
Dick blinked at him owlishly for several long moments, before he turned to Slade. “You saved my crew?”
Slade glowered. “You would’ve been more of a pain in the ass than usual had I left them to drown.”
Dick turned to look at Wintergreen. “He’s a bigger softie than Bruce is.”
“Isn’t he?” Wintergreen agreed. He took a step to the right, and the knife (sheathed) that Slade threw at his head missed him. Wintergreen didn’t seem phased. “Yet, if you put them in the same room -”
“They get all growly and knot-headed.” Dick rolled his eyes and slumped into his nest. Because it was his nest now. Slade could fight him for it. Dick would win, too, because Slade was a huge softie. “I think it’s their alphaness. They need to be seen as the biggest, baddest threat in the room so they gotta square up when there’s an intruder - but if that intruder is a pup then all bets are off.”
“Rose and Joey completely use that to their advantage.”
“Damian gets away with so much! It makes Jason so mad!” Dick cackled gleefully.
“Are you both done yet?” Slade growled. Dick didn’t even twitch an ear.
“Nope!” he beamed before turning back to his new best friend. “I swear I’ll do something that’s less dangerous than what I did when I first started fighting on the seas when I was nine -”
“You were nine?”
“But you’d think I was trying to sail in lava in a wooden ship treated with gasoline with how Bruce reacts!” Dick rolled his eyes.
“Damn, I knew you’d started as a goodie pirate when you were young because you’re all that one;” Wintergreen jabbed his thumb at a cranky looking Slade, “talks about but I didn’t realize you were that young.”
“Yep! Nine when I first started at B’s side, sixteen when I ran away and started without him. Good times, good times… The hell is a goodie pirate?” Dick asked.
“A vigilante that fights by sea.” Wintergreen snorted. “Some of the crews nicknamed your lot that, and it’s stuck. You’ve got your Goodie pirates, you, your dad and most of his crew, that terrifying shadow you call a sibling, and possibly the one that’s missing an organ. Then you’ve got your Begrudging Goodies - your undead sibling, the blonde one, the youngest one, and possibly the one missing the organ and his crew and the one that glows. He’s new, though, but I’m usually pretty good at placing them. The rest of us are just normal pirates.”
“Tim’s missing an organ?!” Dick winced as his shout angered his ribs. He stuck his tongue out at Slade’s pointed look.
“How does Slade know that and you don’t?” Wintergreen cocked his head.
“I don’t know but I will find out and I will be having words with my little brother.” Dick growled, before he aggressively started nesting again.
He ignored Wintergreen as his scent filled with amusement, instead focusing on beating a pillow into place so it would stop trying to murder his wound.
There were certainly lots of ways to care for a wound - murdering it was not one of them.
“Grayson, you’re going to be leaving in three days when the organless one arrives. You might have just entered pre-heat but stop trying to murder my nest.” Slade growled in exasperation.
“You’re wrong.” Dick said simply.
“Excuse me?” Slade said flatly.
“It’s my nest now.” Dick informed him as he made it perfect. He was pretty sure he heard Wintergreen choke on his tongue.
“You don’t get to keep my nest.” Slade growled.
“Fight me for it then.” Dick challenged, jutting out his chin. Wintergreen was wheezing as Slade scowled at him.
It might have been intimidating - had Dick not known that he was tied with Bruce for being the Biggest Secret Softie in the world.
“You couldn’t fight a bird and win right now, little bird.” Slade pointed out. Dick ignored him and kept preening and prepping his nest. The foods that Wintergreen had brought finally registered in his muddled brain (he really needed to get some good sleep) and he made grabby hands for it.
Slade snatched it away from his first mate, making the beta actually laugh aloud, before he himself handed it over to Dick.
What a good alpha he was, providing his omega with heat supplies. Dick purred as he accepted the tray, barely noticing how Wintergreen had sat in Slade’s now-empty chair from the force of his now-silent laugh as Slade puffed up with pride.
Dick put the supplies where they made the most sense in the nest, and where they wouldn’t get squished by him rolling around because he was a very restless sleeper, and ignored the two pirates that were whispering in the background.
“My nest needs more pillows.” Dick announced, emerging from the depths of blankets. Something wasn’t right with his nest, and Dick needed to fix it before he slept.
“It’s still not your nest.” Slade told him.
“And I told you to fight me.” Dick growled.
Slade stood up and loomed from across the room, so Dick looked at him defiantly before he let himself tip forward and out of the nest. There was a low curse and a heavy footstep as Slade lunged and caught Dick before he hit the ground. Scowling and grumbling, Slade - gently - manhandled him into the nest. Before he could pull away, Dick realized what he was missing.
As quickly as he could, he twisted and pulled so that Slade went tumbling into his nest. He suspected that Slade more let him do so than his own ability.
Dick would’ve scowled about it, but Slade being in his nest made the something-isn’t-right feeling go away. It left behind a cozy feeling of safety-protection-caring that seemed to warm the air around him - that, or Slade was warmer than an average human.
Either way, it was making Dick very warm, and very very sleepy.
“Don’t need more pillows.” Dick mumbled as he squished Slade’s stomach and chest to make him more comfy to sleep on. “Got best one now. I s’eep.”
“Grayson I have a ship to run.” His pillow protested. Pillows weren’t supposed to talk, so Dick ignored his pillow.
“Sshh, you heard the Captain, Captain. He sleeps now.”
“Wintergreen I swear -”
“I don’t know why but I feel like you’re taking your life into your hands by coming here. And your hands are small.” Kon said as they flew towards Deathstroke.
“Kon, what the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Tim arched an eyebrow and looked at the back of his head.
“You don’t have much of a grip. You could drop your life and then where would we be?” Kon said, as though that was a perfectly normal thing to say.
“Please, we both know Ra’s would just throw me in the Pit. He likes my organs too much.” Tim responded with his own perfectly reasonable sentence.
“You know that Cassie and Bart are looking for your spleen, right?” Kon was now looking for the window that was the most likely to lead to the Captains quarters. They always snuck in through the window on Nightwing, so why wouldn’t they here?
And getting the drop on assassins was kind of what Tim did now, anyway.
The best part was Tim was equally likely here to lose another organ as he had been with Ra’s.
“Why.” Tim’s question wasn’t even a question.
“Because we’re now best friends with Pru, and once we have your spleen we’re going to use her and Bart and start having the jar follow and stalk him.” Kon said cheerfully. He hovered next to the window, and Tim went to work prying it open.
“I knew you all would get along.” Tim approved. “We’re going to get to fuck with so many more people now.”
“Totally.”
“Let’s grab Dickie and then go back, and then once we’ve dropped him off for the baby to snuggle through his heat we can plan the best spots to put the jar.”
Tim got the window opened and started to shimmy through when he was hit by furious-rip-maim-defenddefendDEFEND and scared-terror-fight! Tim was expecting Dick’s scent, though maybe not to be so strong smelling of fear, but Slade’s alpha’s scent was a surprise that Tim swore and jerked to escape back out of the window - and got stuck.
“WHO TH -”
“TIM WHERE THE FUCK DID YOUR SPLEEN GO?!” Dick bellowed over Slade’s thundering voice. Tim froze, eyes huge. How did…
Nope! No time for that! Dick was pushing Slade out of the nest they were sharing while pointing at him and growling. He was growling so much that even Slade looked cowed into submission.
“Abort abort abort! Slade will survive a heat with Dick but I will not! Abort!” Tim yelped, squirming and kicking his legs. Kon didn’t even try to pull him out. “Kon! Kon you coward get me out of here!”
Of course, like all of his friends claimed, Kon had “self preservation instincts”. So instead of pulling Tim out of the window so they could all go and live in his Goodie Pirate dad’s fortress for the next thirty seven years - Kon pushed him and sent him sailing into Slade’s arms.
And in turn - into Dick’s furious arms.
“You’re on your own!” Kon called from outside. “If Dick does kill you, remember that Ra’s wants your organs so you’ll be fine!”
“TRAITOR!” Tim yelled back.
Slade, holding him upside down from when he’d gone sailing into the window, carried him over to Dick and dropped him beside his oldest brother. This close, Tim could easily see that his brother was still recovering from his ordeal of being kidnapped.
“So.” Dick smiled terrifyingly down at him. “Why did I have to find out from Slade that my little brother is missing an entire organ?!”
Being hurt obviously wasn’t holding Dick back any.
Tim wondered what organ it would cost for Ra’s to bring him back…