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Published:
2023-06-04
Updated:
2023-07-12
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7,239
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8/?
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Ego is a cunt

Summary:

Isagi: next week were supposed to get new people in our club

Bachira: WHO WHO WHOOOOOOOOO

Sae: who yoichi

Isagi: drumroll please

Kurona: isagi i love you but cut that shit and just say it

Isagi: y-you l-love me K-kurona UwU

Hiori: kys

Isagi: 🙁

Yukimiya: we are having three foreign exchange students that are in year 13

Isagi: wait how do you know that

Yukimiya: ego told me when I went to look at my treatment plan

Isagi: Ego’s such a cunt

or

Blue Lock in a Uk secondary school setting (bc I'm British :) ) and they do dumb crazy shit that my school has done that got my head of year to shake their head

Notes:

enjoy this really short mostly unfunny chapter I am setting like the background for kaiser, ness and lorenzo

Chapter 1: dumped (infront of everyone :O)

Chapter Text

Monday ⭐

 

YEAR 12 🐐S

 

Bachira: OMG DID YOU SEE WHAT HAPPENED AT BREAK BY THE SLOPE

 

Kunigami: no i had a detention what happened

 

Bachira: NAGI DUMPED REO INFRONT THE WHOOE OF YEAR 11 AND 12 

 

Bachira: AND HE WALKED OFF TO ISAGI 

 

Isagi: it was actually kinda sad everyone was laughing and recorded it

 

Isagi sent a video

 

[In the video you could see Isagi standing off to the side and Reo and Nagi standing opposite each other but still within close proximity.

 

“What did  you call me for Nagi?” Reo asked with an anticipating smile, since the school summer dance was right around the corner.

 

“Umm... how do I say this without being..” Nagi words trailed off as he thought peacefully to himself.

“I got it. I don’t think we are working.” Nagi said as he walked backwards into Isagi.

 

“You’re leaving me for Isagi! That fucking idiot!” Reo shouted, tears rapidly forming in his eyes.

 

Nagi just ignored him and faced Isagi. He then dragged Isagi’s blazer sleeve and walked sluggishly     off into the direction of the kiosk. 

 

The video ends on Reo trying not to cry as he rushed into Chigiri's arms.]

 

Bachira: now that im seeing the incdient i kinda feel bad for Reo just slightly

 

Chigiri: he’s making it seem like im the one who got broken up with 

 

Chigiri: the amount of sadness I am now feeling from our texts

 

Kunigami: don’t be sad i’ll get you something at lunch

 

Chigiri: thank you <3

 

Raichi: eww fags

 

Reo: don’t act like your not on gagamaru’s dick all day long 

 

Isagi: oop  I wouldn’t have it Raichi 🤭 

 

Raichi: stfu 




Friday ¥

 

YEAR 12 🐐S

 

Reo: I’m over him finally 

 

Isagi: 😮 usually you lament over things for almost 3 years

 

Reo: im gonna kill you my self you fucking homewrecker

 

Isagi: it’s not my fault he wanted to go to the kiosk to buy a drink

 

Reo: yeah right

 

Isagi : @Nagi  back me up

 

Nagi: i was hungry

 

Nagi: so i forced him to get food with me

 

Reo: i could have gotten you food nagi

 

Nagi: you looked like

 

Nagi: you were about to cry

 

Nagi: didn’t want to bother you

 

Chigiri : @Reo dont even try it

 

Reo went offline

 

Isagi: anyways ignoring this everyone go to the blue lock gc rq

 

Blue balls 😏

 

Isagi: next week were supposed to get new people in our club

 

Bachira: WHO WHO WHOOOOOOOOO

 

Sae: who yoichi

 

Isagi: drumroll please

 

Kurona: isagi i love you but cut that shit and just say it

 

Isagi: y-you l-love me K-kurona UwU

 

Hiori: kys

 

Isagi : 🙁 @Rin  

 

Rin: you kinda asked for it with your cringe as hell roleplay

 

Isagi: Year 7 '7A1 RULES' GC on June 6th 

 

Rin has gone offline

 

Yukimiya: anyways we are having three foreign exchange students that are in year 13 

 

Isagi: wait how do you know that

 

Yukimiya: ego told me when I went to look at my treatment plan

 

Isagi: Ego’s such a cunt 

 

 

Chapter 2: ewww white people + a fight :0 +NagiReo's comeback era??

Notes:

I decided to make Rin a year 11 instead of a year 12 I forgot he only recently turned 16 oops

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

MONDAY ⭐

 

YEAR 13 🐕S 😏

Shidou : @Sae good morning my master 😜 😏 😍

 

Baro: wtf

 

Shidou: its okay to be jealous of what me and my snookums has

 

Aiku: no way you call him snookums ☠️

 

Shidou: ik the grandpa aint talking  with your can’t even keep a girlfriend ass

 

Karasu: usually i would try to back u up aiku but he’s not wrong you’ve dated evry girl in year 13 and 12

 

Aiku : so has @Otoya 

 

Otoya: keep me out of this im a changed man and a loyal one too im only dating my dearest crow

 

Karasu: oh otoya that was so fucking hot 

 

Sae: if you guys have nothing tangible to say then don’t text in our groupchat

 

Sae : good morning to you as well @Shidou   

 

Otoya: someone owes me a tenner

 

Otoya screenshotted the chat

Otoya screenshotted the chat





Blue balls 😏

 

Otoya : @Chigiri  you owe mw a tenner

 

Otoya sent two screenshots to the chat 

 

[ Shidou : @Sae good morning my master 😜 😏 😍

 

Baro : wtf]

 

[ Sae : if you guys have nothing tangible to say then don’t text in our group chat

 

Sae : good morning to you as well @Shidou   ]

 

Otoya: wheres my tenner

 

Chigiri: i’ll give it to you at break

 

Isagi: why tf are you always losing bets

 

Isagi: what was it even on

 

Otoya: whether Sae and Shidou are dating

 

Shidou: ofc we are who could resist me 😏

 

Reo: a lot of people 

 

Shidou: didn’t your bf break up with you infront of your entire year

 

Kurona: and the year 11s

 

Kurona: it was actually really funny

 

Reo: stfu shark teeth

 

Kurona: you really thought that landed 

 

Kurona: i have so much i could say but your not worth my time

 

 

 

Bachira: OMG GUYS COME TO THE SIXTH FORM BLOCK RIGHT NOW YOU KNOW THE ROOM THE WINDOWS WAS BROKEN LAST YEAR GO THERE

 

Chigiri: COMING WHATS HAPPENING

 

Raichi: rin and Shidou are fighting but like properly cause there’s no teachers

 

Yukimiya: isagi got dragged into the fight so now its a 2v1 its acc really funny

 

Yukimiya sent a video

 

[In the video you can see a group of people standing around 3 people, in the group you can Bachira, Raichi, Gagamaru and Aryu. 

 

Aryu moves over and the camera can now see Rin and Isagi standing side by side glaring at Shidou who has a nosebleed.

 

“Leave my fucking brother alone you weirdo!” Rin shouts throwing another punch that Shidou almost failed to dodge.

 

Shidou laughs and just smiles. “It’s not my fault he likes it when I gag on his dick.” He said smugly, pissing Rin off more.

 

“Rin Rin I wouldn’t have that punch him!” Bachira exclaims instigating from the side.

 

Isagi and Rin move up to Shidou. Rin punches him while Isagi kicks his leg, both making him scream out whether it was pain or pleasure you couldn’t really tell.

 

The door bursts open with a loud creak and it shows Sae had opened the door.

 

“Rin what the fuck are you doing?” Sae asks standing infront of Shidou who was somehow on the floor.

 

“He was sa-” Rin cut himself off when he saw his brother Sae help Shidou to his feet. 

 

In the background you could see Bachira’s shocked expression. “I kinda expected this of Rin but you Isagi I did not expect you to be a bad influence on him remember he’s younger than you.” Sae said as he helped a limping Shidou out of the room.]

 

Bachira: IM SORRY BUT RINS FACE WHEN HE SEES SAE HELP SHIDOU UP IS PRICELSSS OMG 😂

 

Isagi: speaking of Rin do you know where he went after he just disappeared

 

Chigiri: ask the people in his year dumbass

 

Isagi: stfu Princess

 

Chigiri: i know x.himsagi.x isn’t talking 

 

Isagi: dont make me leak you and kunigmais texts in year 7 cause I have screenshots and I will do it 

 

Chigiri: 🤐

 

Isagi: that’s what i thought



TUESDAY $

 

Blue balls 😏

 

Nagi: isagi

 

Isagi: ?

 

Nagi: have you seen

 

Nagi: these guys

 

Nagi: 1 is blond with blue tips 2 is magenta

 

Nagi: 3 is black

 

Isagi: are you talking about their hair

 

Nagi: 👍

 

Isagi: no

 

Karasu: I HAVE LET ME ADD THEM HERE 

 

Zantestu: are they the facile exchange students

 

Kunigami: you mean foreign

 

Aiku: dumbass 

 

Aiku: what the fuck does facile mean anyway

 

Sae: easy or simplistic 

 

Karasu added 3 people

 

Kaiser: what the fuck type of group chat is this

 

Otoya: Blue Lock’s 

 

Karasu: Official

 

Karasu: Yuki go

 

Yukimiya: Group chat 🙄

 

Chigiri: who knew yukimiya woulg go along with those two numbskulls idea

 

Kaiser: sounds stupid 

 

Kaiser : @everyone I am kaiser the best footballer in the world and you will respect and assist me 

 

Isagi: Baro 2.0 

 

Baro: keep my fucking name out of your weird ass mouth

 

Chigiri: not wrong for once i agree with you isagi he's so egotistical

 

Reo: chigiri dms

 

Chigiri: ?




Chichi + RiRi

 

Chigiri:what

 

Reo: nagi explained why he did that

 

Chigiri: istg i thought you were over him

 

Reo: hear me out

 

Reo: he didn’t know people were going to follow him

 

Reo: he said that 

 

Reo sent an image

Notes:

don't worry ReoNagi or NagiReo fans they will be back i swear it was just a slight miscommunication also wooo cliffhangers also I promise they will play football and ness + lorenzo will properly appear once I sort out reonagi's little situation trust me

Chapter 3: (Hey why so) Serious (:0)

Notes:

this is gonna be serious and very nagi, reo and chigiri oriented so i can be funnier later it was really hard to write because I wanted it to be perfect to not do one of my favourite bllk ship dirty enjoy if you don’t enjoy give me some feedback so I can alter it feedback is appreciated

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

ChiChi and RiRi

 

Reo sent an image

 

[ Nagi: Reo 

 

Reo: yes Nagi

 

Nagi: can we talk

 

Reo: sure

 

Nagi: i wanted to apologise

 

Reo: for

 

Nagi: what I said

 

Reo: you don’t need to apologise for telling me your real feelings

 

Nagi: that wasn’t my true feelings I can’t explain what I mean can I come over

 

Reo: yes ]

 

Reo: he came over and we spoke

 

Reo: we are together again

 

Chigiri: okay Reo we gonna have to meet up so you can explain yourself in person your house or mine

 

Reo: you’re my dad has a business meeting at home I don’t want to be forced to join

 

Chigiri: alright hurry up text me when your here




Bzzt! Chigiri’s phone vibrated and he looked over to the phone and saw a text pop up on his phone from Reo.

 

[ Reo: im here ]

 

And following that was a knock on his front door, Chigiri got out of bed and rushed downstairs to reach the door before his sister. When she saw him she smiled.

 

“Is it your friend?” She asked stepping away from the door and walking towards the kitchen.

 

“Yes.” Chigiri said in response and his sister nodded.

 

He opened the door and Reo stood there with a slight smile on his face that was brimming with excitement.

 

“Come on Reo, let’s go to my room.” Chigiri told Reo as he shut it behind the purple haired boy.

 

Reo nodded and took off his shoes, and slid his feet into the soft slippers at the side for guests, then followed Chigiri up the stairs and into the red heads room.

 

As soon as the door closed Reo and Chigiri both got comfortable on the bed. Then Reo decided to speak, “So what did you want me to explain?”

 

“The whole thing, from the beginning.”

 

“Okay,” Reo took a deep breath and calmed himself down before continuing, “we met when we were in Primary school ,though I didn’t know, and went to the same secondary. We started dating in year 8 after you and Kunigami but I liked him in year 7 and-“ he was cut off by Chigiri’s glare.

 

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

 

Reo sighed. “Okay fine I’ll tell you.”

 

When Reo was younger he got everything he wanted whenever he wanted but it made him bored. So when Reo saw him in year 7 he was amazed.

 

Nagi was sitting on the steps that Reo was walking down and he accidentally bumped into him. Recently Reo’s dream had been to win the World Cup, it wasn’t a boring endeavour that he could get with the click of his fingers, he had to put effort he had never hat to before. It felt great.

 

Nagi starting falling forward and he caught his phone which had fallen, not with his hands but with his feet. He had trapped it. Reo was shocked he had never seen this boy before, in class and the football team.

 

“Hey, you. Do you play football?”

 

“No.” The boy responded, tapping his fingers rapidly on his screen.

 

“You should, you’re good.”

 

“Too much effort.”

 

“I’m Reo Mikage. I am going to win the World Cup and I want you to help me.” Reo said as the other cursed to himself quietly as he lost.

 

“Nagi.”

 

Reo smiled. 



“So that’s how we met, you definitely know the rest.”

 

Chigiri nodded. “Okay so why are you guys getting together after you broke up last week?”

 

“Right so, after that the next day he told me something...” Reo trailed off before refocusing, “promise me you won’t tell anyone what I’m about to say.”

 

Chigiri nodded.

 

“Alright so,”

 

[Reo was sitting across from Nagi, on his bed. His ex boyfriend, his best friend whom he cherished so much (he still does). 

 

I’m not good with feelings or  communicating. And you misunderstood me." Nagi said, leaning back on Reo’s bed.

 

"Misunderstood?"

 

"I told you we weren’t working, I didn't mean in our relationship." Nagi replied almost instantly, staring straight at the purple haired boy.

 

"What took you so long to tell me?"

 

"You blocked me," Nagi rolled over and moved his way into Reo's comfortable (according to Nagi) lap. “I meant like, how we behave. I don’t know how to explain it.”

 

“It’s okay, take your time, Nagi. We have the whole rest of the day, and I can wait for your proper explanation.”

 

“Mmh.” Nagi pulled Reo in for a hug that quickly turned into a cuddle session with Reo being the little spoon.]

 

“that’s what happened.”

 

“You guys are alright now, then?”

 

“Yes, we are.”

 

Chigiri turned on his phone and checked the time. 19:00 pm.

 

“Do you want to sleep over?”

 

“Like old times?”

 

Chigiri nodded.

Notes:

im sorry this took a while to type up because i wanted it to make sense and sound right so i always edited chapter 1 slightly to make it link with this
also tell me if you liked this better than the chatfic if so ig i could put extra hours in when im supposed to be studying for end of years but who cares

Chapter 4: football trip part 1 (:0)

Notes:

I was supposed to update this on the 12th June then I got heat stroke bc it's so hot in the UK
Next chapter should be longer hopefully
this also unedited bc I cant be asked to

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

Blue balls 😏

 

Isagi:guess what

 

Rin: you’re dying

 

Rin: finally

 

Isagi: don’t act like we aren’t having a sleepover with your bae rn

 

Bachira: 😲

 

Chigiri: rins dating someone

 

Niko: now thats surprising

 

Kurona: i agree rin has such a shit personality

 

Rin: stfu i know what u 2 said in that gc

 

Kurona: 🤐

 

Niko: you think im afraid of you i said what i said

 

Rin: so i can leak it then

 

Kurona: niko stop i get exposed too if you want everyone to know you say your peace keep me out of this

 

Niko: whatever

 

Isagi: anyways as I was saying 

 

Isagi: guess what

 

Karasu: there's a discount at the canteen

 

Otoya: that only happens when people get food poisoning

 

Karasu: so 

 

Yukimiya: you’re both dumbasses

 

Otoya: oh you wound my heart my dear

 

Karasu: y-your dear what about i your lover your one and only husband

 

Otoya: yes I do love you but you cannot provide for me and our soon to arrive children yuki can 

 

Yukimiya: I actually want to jump off the top of my maths block 

 

Nanase: actually this got me thinking you know what i mean hiori

 

Hiori: @Karasu @Otoya are you two dating

 

Karasu: no

 

Otoya: no it's just role-playing ask yuki

 

Yukimiya: keep me out of this

 

Isagi: can you faggots stop interupting me oh my god

 

Isagi: now we have a trip to this facility called Blue Lock and we will be training against other schools but mostly against us 

 

Isagi: go to student services at break/lunch to get a letter today and return it by this week Friday its next week monday 

 

Raichi: slursagi is back again

 

MONDAY💫

 

Blue balls 😏

 

Chigiri: wheres reo and Nagi

 

Reo: almost there it took nagi a while to wake up

 

Reo: wait why were you looking for us don’t tell me you miss me that bad from the last time we slept together

 

Aiku: how come you get to sleep with together hes still unmarked on my smash list 

 

Chigiri: of course I missed you reo I couldn’t forget last week but nah Anri is doing the register hurry 

 

Chigiri : also unfortunately I don’t want to have sex with a 90 year old @Aiku

 

Niko: me personally would never have that

 

Kurona: agreed I would jump off of maths block

 

Isagi: jumping off buildings you say 

 

Sae: don't even

 

Isagi: 🤐

 

Aiku: im not 90 years old

 

Niko: you are basically 90

 

Aiku: how could you Niko my one and only brother

 

Bachira: you guys are brothers 

 

Niko: unfortunately 

 

Aiku: be a nicer piece of shit

 

Aiku: i know most of your secrets 

 

Niko: sorry brother 

 

Bachira: wait but you have different last names

 

Niko: different mum same dad 

 

Aiku: best half brothers ever

 

Isagi: wait is everyone here yet

 

Kunigami: the two Germans aren't here and Zantestu 

 

Yukimiya : @Zantestu  where are you

 

Zantestu: you guys said that the coach will be parked down bu the shops but it's not there

 

Gagamaru: 🤦♂️

 

Isagi: the letter literally says it's infront of the school gates 

 

Karasu: classic Zantestu 

 

Otoya: agreed

 

Yukimiya: you have 3 minutes before we leave 

 

Sae : @Kaiser   @ Ness 

 

Kaiser: what

 

Isagi: where are you two

 

Ness: we are already there Er ist zu blöd und es ist wirklich lustig

 

Kaiser: Ja aber er ist ziemlich interessant 

 

Ness: Nein 

 

Zantestu: im here now

 

Isagi: wtf did that even mean German peices of shit

 

MONDAY💫

 

12:36pm

 

Blue balls 😏

 

Raichi sent an image

 

[ In the image it showed Isagi and Bachira asleep; Bachira was resting his head against Isagi. Isagi had his head leaning towards Bachira and their fingers were interlocked. Isagi’s other hand was resting on the inner area of Bachira’s thigh.]

 

Raichi: these ugly fags then they say there not dating

 

Reo: you do realise Isagi is going to come after you because of that photo

 

Raichi: i aint afraid of fags

 

Chigiri: oh Isagis waking up

 

Isagi: so youre not afraid of me raichi very bold claim and move 

 

Isagi sent images

 

[In the first image it is Raichi sleeping next to  Gagamaru. More specifically Raichi is laying his whole body on Gagamaru who looks to be playing with the blonde's hair.

 

In the second image it is a young Raichi and young Gagamaru kissing. Raichi is holding Gagamaru’s face as he sits in his lap and kisses him.]

 

Bachira: BE WHO YOU ARE FOR YOUR PRIDEEEEE

 

Chigiri: i just saw raichi go a bright red 

 

Niko: how did no one know those two were hooking up

 

Niko: me isagi and kurona knew immediately 

 

Aiku: not everyone focuses on the relationships of others

 

Niko: that's rich coming from you just saying

 

Barou: can everyone stfu we have around 2 hours left and I want more sleep



MaidBaro+HaremProtagNiko

 

Niko: was I annoying you

 

Baro: no you weren't 



2bros

 

Aiku: I know 

 

Niko: know what 

 

Aiku: you like him

 

Niko: shut up okay

 

Aiku: i now hold something against you

 

Niko: stfu sendou is going to be there

 

Aiku: how did u know and i didnt 

 

Niko: 🤷♂️ guess he likes me better

 

Blue balls 😏

 

Karasu: raichi it's okay to be gay 

 

Otoya: we fully support you (yuki say it)

 

Yukimiya: being gay is not a sickness (these lines are fucking stupid)

 

Raichi: im not gay tho you two are

 

Karasu: #nottrue 

 

Otoya: #webothhavegfs

 

Isagi: they wont tell the truth no matter how much you ask them

 

Karasu: #tellingthetruth

 

Otoya: #justbestbros

 

Hiori: so you aren't dating Gagamaru 

 

Raichi: no

 

Nanase : @Gagamaru  are you and raichi dating

 

Raichi: why are you even asking him 

 

Nanase: he never lies 

 

Gagamaru: 🤔

 

Gagamaru: 🙅♂️

 

Raichi: see we're just like those two idiots karasu and otoya

 

Bachira: imagine using them as your reason for why 

 

Aiku: they are the most gayest of us all have you never seen them Dancing or their drag queen era


Karasu: YOU LITERALLY SAID THAT YOUW WOULDNT MENTIONED IT ALL IT WAS A JOKE  EVERYONE ITW NEVER HAPPENED

Notes:

hope you loved my german learning it in school paid off

Chapter 5: football trip 2 ft. relationship drama (maybe) :0 (Lorenzo actually makes an appearance)

Summary:

Shidou: that was so boring but seeing Sae stand up to give a speech got me up bricked up

Yukimiya: sometimes we don’t need to know about what you think or how you see Sae

Shidou: says the blind mf 🤦♂️

Karasu: Yukki don’t take that

Otoya: go sicko mode

Yukimiya: didn’t you use to like Rin

Rin:????

Rin: 🤮

Sae: What.

Notes:

lorenzo actually appears i was just wondering how to portray his character, also relationship drama is amazing as an aroace person i love watching it and sitting in the sidelines with popcorn also incase ppl are wondering some ppls ages are diff like Hiori who is actually 17 but i have him as 16 and niko who is 15 who i made 16 and Barou is 17 im happy this is longer than usual

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

The coach finally arrived and Anri ordered them to all file out single file taking their backpacks with them. They already opened the luggage compartment and were getting their suitcases out; they were going to be here for a little while.

 

"Alright, before we go in, please line up so we can make sure everyone's off the bus." Anri said, bringing out her register while everyone lined up.



When Anri was done she smiled and waved at them as she went to check that the bus was clean and empty. Ego finally took over and slowly began to lead the teenagers into the direction of blue lock.



When they entered the building they did body checks, drug tests and bag searches; they were also among around 200 other people. They were being sorted and most people were directed to the right while the boys were directed to the left.

 

"Bachira, stop pushing me!" Chigiri shouted, bumping into Kunigami and almost falling over due to Bachira’s overexcitement.

 

"It's just been so fucking long since we had a trip together!" Bachira shouted jumping on Isagi who surprisingly caught him as if he had known he was going to pull a stunt like this.

 

They continued to follow Ego when they got their stuff back and Ego gave them a prompt tour of the different facilities.

 

"Go rest up in your rooms, there are 2-4 people per room, at 2pm come to the canteen." Ego said before slinking off to his office.



1

 

"Yukki and Eita let's room together," Karasu said, wrapping his arms around the two and pulling them backwards which in turn almost made Yukimiya fall over.

 

“I don’t have a choice, do I?” Yukimiya asked nonchalantly.

“Nope. Ya stuck with us for the rest of your life.” Karasu replied, causing Yukimiya to roll his eyes.

 

“Whatever.” Yukimiya said with a slight smile.



2



“Yoichi, take me to our room.” Bachira commanded still on the boy’s back.

 

“Our room?”

 

“Yeah? Let's be real Yoichi, no one would ever want to share a room with you.” Bachira said as Isagi began to walk in the directions of the dorm key registration zone.

 

“Rude.”

 

“Did I lie, or did I tell the honest truth?” Bachira asked in a tv presenter-like voice and before Isagi could respond he continued, “find out next time on Blue Lock TV!” Bachira shouted, dragging Isagi so they would move faster.

 

“Isagi, want to room together?” A voice asks, stopping Bachira in his tracks. Isagi and Bachira both turned around at the same time to see Rin and Hiori.

 

“See, someone does want to room with me. I knew you were wrong, Megu.” Isagi declared proudly

 

“Don’t take this the wrong way, there are a limited number of rooms per school so it makes more sense to room with people we know.” Rin said, frowning at Bachira as the boy almost jumped onto him. 

 

“Yeah you two can room with us. Come on Megu.” Isagi said, dragging Bachira off a disgusted Rin who moved closer to the shorter blue haired boy.



3

 

“Chigiri, be with me and Nagi with your man.” Reo whispered.

 

“He’s not my man.” Chigiri mumbled blushing bright red and lightly pushing Reo.

 

“Yet. Go ask him to join us.” Reo said, pushing Chigiri in the direction of Kunigami.

Kunigami was holding his own stuff but someone else's as well. He was leaning against the wall closing his eyes, but as soon as Chigiri approached he opened one.

 

“Umm… Kunigami, do you want to be in my room?” Chigiri asked, fiddling with his fingers.

 

“Who else is in the room?” Kunigami asked in response, handing Chigiri his bags.

 

“Thank you,” Chigiri said, holding his backpack and suitcase handle,“in my room are Reo and Nagi.”

 

Kunigami thought for a second and took Chigiri’s luggage back. “Let’s go register.”

 

Chigiri smiled and looked over at Reo. He had given Chigiri a thumbs up and Chigiri nodded in reply. Reo woke up Nagi and the four walked to register. 



5

 

“Ikki, please room with me. I can’t be with Shuuto by myself!” Aiku exclaimed fake sobbing into his brother’s shoulder.

 

“What does that have to do with me? I’m rooming with Barou.” Niko said nonchalantly, hoping his brother didn't hear the last part.

 

“YOU’RE ROOMING WITH WHO? NO YOU’RE NOT! AT LEAST NOT WITHOUT ME.” Aiku shouted standing upright. 

 

“You can’t stop me from rooming with him.” Niko responded and turned around.

 

“Actually, Kana told me to protect you from people like him. YOU’RE TOO YOUNG!” Aiku shouted, almost crying on Niko's shoulder. 

 

Then from behind a salmon pink haired boy [*apparently its salmon pink i double checked on the wiki as well*] appeared. “Oliver, stop shouting at him,” the boy said, hitting Aiku on the head, Aiku knew immediately who it was; Sendou, “what has he done to disturb you now Niko?”

 

“Sendou he won’t let me room with someone.” Niko said conveniently leaving out the fact that it's his crush.

 

“Din jävla lögnare! Han är din crush!” Aiku yelled. *You fucking liar! He's your crush!*- translation

 

“Is this true? Niko.” Sendou asked, he had learned Swedish around the time Aiku and him became friends .

 

Niko looked over at Senou who was staring him down. “Yes.” Niko responded afraid of what would happen if he lied.

 

“Kana and Henrika both told me to make sure you both don’t argue. How about this, you and your crush room with me and Oliver.” Sendou said, lifting Aiku up. It sounded like a suggestion but he knew it was more of a command.

 

Niko nodded and walked away to go find Barou.

 

“Shuuto. It’s been a while.” Aiku said, leaning against the other male. “You remember Wilma. The girl my mum set me up with?” Sendo nodded in response. “She broke up with me 3 days ago because I’m too complicated and talk about my friends too much. I also cheated on her.”

 

“The last part was what I was waiting for. No way you could date someone without cheating.”

 

“Actually don’t you remember Year 7 when I dated that dude and I never cheated on him did I?” 

 

“Yeah but he cheated on you with the foreign exchange student Megan, remember?”

 

“Oh shut up. You’re such a hater. It's all in the past. I just gotta focus on the next.”

 

“I feel sorry for Henrika now.”

 

The two boys were laughing and still catching up when Niko came back two minutes later with Barou right on his tail.

 

"Niko, du kunde göra bättre än den saken.” Sendou said, looking an annoyed Barou up and down. *Niko, you could do better than that thing.*- translation 

 

“Eww fags.” Barou said, pretending to vomit. “I don’t care what you do, just keep the room tidy.” Barou said as he walked off to the registration area; he was holding both his and Niko’s belongings.

 

6

 

“Gaga, let's go get our room.” Raichi said, waking up Gagamaru who was sleeping on a sofa next to the blonde. 

 

They made their way to registration and Zantetsu was there in line.

 

“So you three. Alright, here's your keys.” The lady at the computer said, handing out three key cards to room 6. 

 

“Three?” Raichi asked picking up the remaining two keycards and handing one to Gagamaru

 

“Looks like. We are with Zantetsu.” Gagamaru said slowly.

 

“Excuse me? Can we change our rooms?”

 

“I’m afraid not. We need a certain amount in each room and there is a certain number of rooms per school.” The lady explained, causing Raichi to frown.

 

“Zantetsu isn't that bad.” Gagamaru said, holding Raichi’s hand.

 

Raichi just rolled his eyes in response and the two followed Zantetsu out of the hall.



7

 

“Nanase, let’s room together since Rin and Hiori deserted us.” Kurona said dramatically as he began fake crying. 

 

“Drama queen. Yet you’re still shit in drama.” Nanase joked, earning a glare from Kurona. 

 

“Don’t hate the player, hate the game. Our drama teacher is shit and you know that.” Kurona began spouting excuses on why his acting wasn’t improving.

 

“Yeah, yeah I get it, let's go register. I heard there are only 8 rooms, so let's hurry so we can have a room of 2 to ourselves.” Kurona shouted, sprinting to the registration queue. 

 

Nanase briskly walked behind him, not being bothered to walk too fast.

 

“Here you two go, it’s for room 7.”

 

8

 

“Sae, let’s room together!” Shidou shouted, running and hugging Sae, making the shorter male stagger back. 

 

“Ok.” Sae said in response as Shidou took his luggage and they made their way to the registration area.

 

“You have to wait for the last two people to get a room, your school only booked 8 rooms for the players.” The lady at the desk said as she typed away on her computer. She looked up when she heard Shidou approaching. “Alright, I can give you your room key now. It’s 8.” She put four key cards on the desk and Shidou bumped into Aryu who was in front of him causing the long-haired man to shriek which then caused Tokimitsu to shriek and almost drop Aryu’s hair & makeup bag.

 

“No way am I rooming with that horny demon, that is so unglam.” Aryu said, picking up two key cards; one for him and one for Tokimitsu. He then sashayed away grumbling about how ‘unglam’ Shidou is to Tokimitsu who kept nodding his head to agree with his friend.

 

Sae picked up his and Shidou's keycards and followed Shidou who had charged after Aryu and was ready to scold him.



Blue balls 😏

 

Shidou : that was so boring but seeing Sae stand up to give a speech got me bricked up

 

Yukimiya : sometimes we don’t need to know about what you think or how you see Sae 

 

Shidou : says the blind mf 🤦♂️

 

Karasu : Yukki don’t take that

 

Otoya : go sicko mode

 

Yukimiya : didn’t you use to like Rin

 

Rin :????

 

Rin : 🤮

 

Sae : What.

 

Isagi : hes serious he pulled out the capital letters and punctuation

 

Bachira : 📸

 

Karasu : 😲 

 

Otoya : y are u surprised he told us on the 💪😍❤👩❤️💋👨💏 gc

 

Isagi : wtf kinda gc name is that

 

Shidou is offline

 

Sae is offline

 

Hiori : ooh drama

 

Reo : dont you think you went too far that was a secret

 

Chigiri : wait how come you knew

 

Reo : 🤫 🤐 

 

Niko : it was ages ago

 

Kurona : u knew and didn't tell me :((((

 

Isagi : Niko you fucking cunt you made Kurona upset

 

Niko : I found out like two days ago from Oliver not my fault

 

Otoya : you must get kicked for sharing a trade secret

 

Lorenzo : finally able to type in the gc

 

Lorenzo : stupid ass author forgot my ass

 

Lorenzo : good evening hoes are your dicks getting wet

 

Chigiri : who the fuck is this

 

Lorenzo : your future+your present 😘 🥰 💏

 

Chigiri :eww

 

Barou : oh my fucking god can everyone shut the fuck up for once god sakes

 

Lorenzo : OMG MY LIL SHO HIW HAVE YOU BEEN ITS BEEN A WHILE

 

Barou has gone offline

 

Aiku : 'lil sho' hmm suspicious 

 

Kurona : on it let's work harder

 

Hiori : and faster

 

Nanase : than ever

 

Aiku : 🤔

 

Tuesday⚽️🏳️🌈

 

YEAR 13 🐕S 😏

 

Aiku : Barou who is Lorenzo

 

Karasu : tell us tell us

 

Otoya : tell us tell us

 

Sae : his ex

 

Otoya : 😲 x2 bc Sae is okay now

 

Shidou : when I see Yukimiya imma make sure he never sees again

 

Karasu : no not our bb

 

Otoya : hes too pretty to go

 

Aiku : @Sae who would date barou

 

Sae : 🤷♂️ 

 

2bros

 

Aiku : Niko

 

Aiku : Niko

 

Aiku : ik your reading my messages

 

Aiku : its about your loverboy

 

Niko : what

 

Aiku : you know Lorenzo 

 

Niko : yea

 

Aiku : he used to date barou

 

Niko : …

Notes:

sorry i was sick but now im back as a little treat I will try to get out a short but funnyish chapter either today or tomorrow also I'm not swedish so the translation is probably scuffed

Chapter 6: football trip 2.5 ft. discord kittens + fanfiction

Notes:

little chapter to make up being sick

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

4:00 pm

Blue balls 😏



Isagi: i just heard the wildest shit ever

 

Chigiri: im afraid to ask but what

 

Isagi: i just heard meowing from nanase and kuronas room what u guys doing in there

 

Bachira : @Nanase  @Kurona 

 

Nanase: uhhh 

 

Kurona: cat videos

 

Niko: wait you guys have been chatting to Andrew without me

 

Reo: andrew?

 

Niko: hot billionaire andrew

 

Reo: oh that andrew isnt he like 19

 

Kurona: but he’s hot

 

Hiori: i swear you guys said you’d wait for me and niko

 

Karasu: you know what im thinkin eita

 

Otoya: there discord kittens for rich men

 

Isagi: huh???

 

Chigiri: wait reo how do you know him

 

Reo: works with my dad

 

Hiori: maybe we are maybe we arent

 

Bachira: does he pay well

 

Hiori: no (yes he does like 1k per phone call)

 

Niko: dont ask there are no vacancies

 

Bachira: damn it

 

Reo: just use Isagis money 

 

Chigiri: Isagi has money????

 

Reo: yeah his parents are kinda rich 

 

Karasu: dont ignore the fact that the yr 11s are discord kittens

 

Barou: stfu why are there so many notifs

 

Otoya: scroll up

 

Aiku: ikki im disapointed in you 

 

Aiku: give me 25% and i wont snitch

 

Niko: cunt

 

Niko: fine

 

Barou: your doing this as well niko

 

Niko: yeah 

 

Bachira: are you sure there are no vacancies

 

Hiori: yep unless one of us quits



9:00pm

 

Blue balls 😏

 

Karasu: good evening all 

 

Otoya: welcome to the Karatoya show

 

Karasu: tonight we are hosting with the great model and footballer Yukimiya Kenyuu

 

Yukimiya: hello all (someone save me im being held hostage)

 

Karasu: our topic today is fanfiction 

 

Otoya: specifically chigiris fanfics from year 7 which were submitted by a fan

 

Chigiri: wait ahwt no no i deleted thiose

 

Isagi: not fast enough

 

Zantetsu: finally im not being talked abot on the show im not be radiated in this groupchat

 

Kunigami: you mean ridiculed 

 

Nagi: i read it its not that bad

 

Nagi: i lied its shit 

 

Bachira: imagine nagi saying ur shit ha

 

Nagi: U >_< U

 

Isagi : thats what chigiri deserves  

 

Kaiser: how bad could it be

 

Ness: its probably horrible Es kann nicht besser sein als deine Fanfiction Kaiser bc your perfect

 

Isagi: sound the alarms we have a chief dick rider in the building

 

Kaiser: shush your disturbing the program

 

Otoya: anyways 200k words y/n x Childe enemies to lovers smut 25 chapters

 

Karasu: how lovely lets read the first paragraph Yukki hit it

 

Yukimiya: sorry Chigiri

 

Yukimiya: 'Where was I?' I thought to myself. It was too dark to see, the last thing I remember was that I was tailing my enemy, Childe. He was a fatui harbinger and Yelan had ordered me to keep tabs on him so she would know his every move. He was needed when we wanted to conduct some business deals with Snezhnaya, so that meant I couldn’t kill him no matter how irritating he was to be around. 

 

Otoya: second paragraph then Tabi

 

Karasu: its supposed to be you

 

Karasu: how could you forget 😞

 

Otoya: im sorry my little crow ill never forget ever again please forgive me

 

Barou: stfu and stop roleplaying you fags

 

Aiku: are we sure they arent dating

 

Sendou: definitely are and just havent realised it

 

Lorenzo: just seeing that made me want to cum

 

Shidou: same great minds cum together

 

Sae: i regret associating with all of you 

 

Sae has muted the chat for 10 hours

Notes:

watch me disappear for weeks :) joking I wont hopefully

Chapter 7: football trip 2.6 ft stupidity, slurs and gays

Notes:

Last chapter in pride month this year mwah ĺove all of you hope you had good prides im here to give myself a pride gift which is why the chapter exists

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

3:00 AM

 

Fruitloops & Otoya + Karasu + Yukki 🏳️‍🌈 👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨👩‍❤️‍💋‍👨

 

Karasu : GOOD MORNING GAYS

 

Otoya : AND THEYS (we aint forget abt you Bachira stay strong ✊)

 

Barou : its 3 in the fucking morning stfu

 

Bachira : thank you Otoya it means the world 😁

 

Karasu : just the man we needed 

 

Otoya : @Everyone get online we got 3 trials to hold

 

Aryu : you know some people need their 8 hours aka me so make this quick 

 

Yukimiya : speed it up

 

Karasu : yes yukki sir 👍

 

Otoya : on trial today we have multiple defendants which are @Barou @Chigiri @Isagi   

 

Karasu : let us begin with @Barou today you stand accused of being gay how do you plead

 

Barou : don’t involve me in your stupid little trial bs

 

Otoya : i take that as he pleads guilty

 

Bachira : what evidefence do you have

 

Otoya : Barou used to date a man lets invite this man into the gc

 

Karasu added 1 person to the group

 

Lorenzo : HELLO BITCHES HAPPY PRIDE MWAH MWAH I LOVE THE FAGS

 

Karasu : hello lorenzo is it true that you used to date @Barou  

 

Lorenzo : YEP ME AND MY LIL’ SHO DATED WHEN WE WERE 13 IN ITALY (ps hes a good kisser)

 

Barou : never happened 

 

Barou went offline

 

Otoya : He’s guilty as charged 

 

Karasu : coming up next @Chigiri  

 

Otoya : just shoot your shot 

 

Chigiri : what are you talking about

 

Otoya : we knew youd sau ythat so we have a key witness to help you remember why your guilty of being a FAG

 

Reo : hello yes hello its me

 

Chigiri : don't even reo

 

Reo : why should I listen to you

 

Yukimiya : I mean the closet is glass most people already know

 

Reo sent 2 images

 

[Chigiri: REO REO

 

Reo: yeah

 

Chigiri: DID YOU SEE HIW FINE HE LOOKED THIS MORNING HE IS SO HANDSOME AND OMG I WENT INTO THE WORKOUT ROOM AND HE WAS SHIRTLESS WITH HIS ABS

 

Reo: istg not this again ]

 

[Chigiri: YOU DONT GET IT HES SO FINE LIKE HAVE YOU SEEN HIM HAVE YOU SEEN KUNI ]

 

Otoya : if that isn't gay idk what is

 

Chigiri : you know what

 

Chigiri : I said what I said

 

Chigiri : @ him if you want idc

 

Karasu : @Kunigami come collect your man

 

Kunigami : you think im hot princess

 

Isagi : idk why he's saying it like this he's literally giggling and blushing

 

Kunigami : stfu

 

Karasu : speaking of which Isagi step up to the stands

 

Otoya : with Tabitos expert observation skills and my nosiness we have discovered one of your big secrets

 

Isagi : what is it then

 

Karasu : you and Bachira have been dating since year 7

 

Nagi : :0

 

Isagi : yeah and what about it why don't you two come up yo the stand

 

Karasu : for what?

 

Isagi : you are one of the biggest fags ik

 

Karasu : lies

 

Otoya : deceit

 

Karasu and Otoya are offline 

 

Bachira : they escaped

 

Notes:

edited it now

Chapter 8: football trip 3 ft. Football,food fight , relationships

Notes:

uh so I watched the new spiderman movie with one of my best friends and then I fell into hyperfixation hell still trying to crawl out but I can't (btw I love Hobie so much and feel robbed that Spidernoir barely had any screen time cant wait till march 29)

Chapter Text

5:30 AM



"So, I'm hot?" Kunigami asked, leaning against the wall beside Chigir and staring at the shorter male.

 

"Uh…um…" Chigiri stuttered, turning bright red, "yeah, especially when you take your…" the boy trailed off at the end when he looked at the ginger.

 

"My what?” The ginger asked, in a serious tone.

 

Your shirt off when you workout .” Chigiri mumbled the rest of the sentence under his breath.

 

“My what off?”

 

“Shirt! When you take your shirt off when you workout!” Chigiri exclaimed before covering his face that was bright red from embarrassment. 

 

Kunigami smiled and wrapped his arms around Chigiri who froze up. “So is that your own way of saying you like me?” Chigiri nodded in response to Kunigami’s question and wrapped his arms around Kunigami’s back. “I like you too.”

 

“Get a room! Boo!” Reo shouted, throwing a pillow at Kunigami, who caught it on reflex.

 

“Why don’t you, you fucking purple haired hypocrite!” Chigiri shouted playfully, slipping out of Kunigami’s hands and running towards Reo who was sitting with his boyfriend in his lap. 

 

Chigiri immediately jumped on Reo, who had pushed Nagi off of him, and attempted to hit the purple haired male when his boyfriend  friend pulled him off and carried him to the other side of the room before setting him on Chigiri’s bed. 

 

“Don’t fight, we have practice after breakfast at 8:30.” Kunigami said, Chigiri pouted in response but still sat down.




“Breakfast is now ready and will close at 8:05 AM please go and get breakfast in your respective areas.”



Chigiri jumped off the bed and held Kunigami’s hand and dragged him to the canteen not noticing the blush that was rapidly spreading across the ginger’s face.

 

Reo followed the two out carrying Nagi on his back as Nagi was slipping off the sleep once more.




“STOP CALLING ME YOICHI YOU DRY CUMSTAIN!” Isagi shouted throwing food at Kaiser’s head that landed in his hair.

 

“HE’LL CALL YOU WHATEVER HE WANTS TO ACTUALLY!” Ness shouted throwing food back and carefully removing the food from Kaiser’s head.

 

Kaiser then picked up a piece of cheese from his plate and flung it directly into Isagi’s face prompting Kurona and Bachira to launch food over at the two Germans in retaliation.

 

“Food fight!" Karasu and Otoya shouted in unison as the two slowly slipped out with Yukimiya following close behind, but not before Karasu threw food at Hiori.



By the time Ego could be bothered to leave his office/room the food fight was mostly over and it was clear that the winners were Sae and Shidou who quietly slipped out as soon as Ego cleared his throat. “Who started this?” He asked, uninterested. 

 

“Put more care into your players, Ego.” Anri scolded before turning to the players. “Which one of you started this? First person to come clean gets a lighter punishment.” She said sternly which actually scared some of the players.

 

"Isagi and Kaiser!" Chigiri and Reo shout in sync.

 

"Thank you Chigiri and Reo," Anri said smiling at the two who were laughing with each other, "now Isagi Yoichi and Kaiser Michael, to Ego's office now!" She shouts when she turns to the two who are about to punch each other in the face again.

 

Isagi lets go of Kaiser and straightens up, he  walks out of the canteen with Bachira following directly behind trying to wipe the food from his body.

 

" UGH! Das alles hätte vermieden werden können, wenn Yoichi nur nicht so eine Fotze wäre!" Kaiser complained as he stormed off, Ness behind him, "aber es ist schön!"



"Now I didn't want to bring this back but I have to," she started as she began to rummage through a pile of stuff in the corner of Ego’s office, "found it." 

 

She pulled out a large top that had ' GET ALONG TOGETHER SHIRT' written in big bulky letters. Isagi panicked when he saw this top as it reminded him of how him and Rin had to wear this shirt together during practice a lot when Rin first joined the school.

 

"Put it on, when you can behave it can be removed."

 

"How are we supposed to play football in this?" Kaiser asked after they had put the shirt on.

 

"I don't know, figure it out." Anri said before walking off to do whatever it is she was busy doing usually.

 

Kaiser sighed heavily and tried to turn left but was pulled back because Isagi was turning right.

 

After a few minutes of arguing the two managed to finally exited egos office and make their way to the training facilities.

 

As soon as they entered they were met with laughter from the other players. "I haven't seen that shirt since Rin and Isagi had the fight on the slope." Chigiri mentioned as he tried not to laugh.

 

"Oh my God that one where they tumbled down the hill with Bachira following with that camera?" Raichi rhetorically asked bursting into laughter.

 

"Yeah, whatever. Laugh if you want prices once I'm out of this shirt it's game over for you guys." Isagi said in response as Bachira approached him and they went into conversation.



"Practice march will commence in 5 minutes please go to pitch 3."



"Okay we'll have two captains, Rin and Sae." Ego said after pausing shortly. "Choose whoever, Isagi and Kaiser are counted as 1 person." He said as we stalked off to the side next to Anri who had her clipboard out and was scribbling away.

 

"I'll start since I'm older," Sae said, earning a glare from his younger brother but he surprisingly didn't lash out. "Shidou." 

 

Shidou ran up to Sae and clung to the smaller boy's arm squeezing it tightly. "Oh Sae this is getting me turned on, can't believe you picked me first." 

 

"The match hasn't even begun, keep it in your pants." Sae said in response as if this is normal for him.

 

"Gagamaru." 

 

Everyone stared puzzled. Out of all people, everyone expected Rin to pick Hiori or maybe even Isagi (less likely now that Kaiser and him are a package deal).

 

"We need a goalkeeper and Gagamaru can play in goal so why not choose him? It's the most logical option."  Was all Rin said in response.

 

"You guys are taking forever I have things to do," Ego said, taking Anri's clipboard, "I'm choosing the rest of the teams."

 

Rin's team was: Gagamaru, Bachira, Niko, Chigiri, Hiori, Ness, Nagi, Kaiser+Isagi, Kunigami, Rin and Barou. (Kaiser and Isagi are one player)

 

Sae's team was: Aryu, Aiku, Lorenzo, Raichi, Reo, Sae, Karasu, Otoya, Sendo, Yukimiya and Shidou.