Chapter Text
Nakajima Atsushi—the grim reaper personified—otherwise known as Silver death… His name carries weight, a weight that made them tremble in fear. For a while, Dazai, the demon prodigy, mentored Atsushi up until he disappeared.
Atsushi’s mentor switched to Chuuya who had willingly taken him in alongside another protege Dazai decided to take in just 2 years after Atsushi. Chuuya will forever resent him for that.
Mori had sent him out on a mission, a rather dangerous one but his abilities were terrifying. Self-healing, regeneration, insane durability, enhanced senses… He was practically invincible, an unkillable death machine.
All he had to do was eliminate everyone in the entire building, then bring back the documents. Easy and he was well prepared.
What Atsushi was unprepared for however, was that Mori had sent him out on a suicide mission. Why? Because he was faced with someone he can’t ever beat.
God, Chuuya would hate him…
Atsushi stands tall and firm against his enemies- the Armed Detective Agency. They sent their entire offensive team to watch him, but only one stood against him.
Dazai Osamu… Port Mafia’s traitor, the youngest executive in all of Mafia history… The demon prodigy.
Atsushi lets out a deep growl, “Nakajima Atsushi, a mafioso also known as the man-eating tiger and silver death. 18 years old, born on the 5th of May. Ability: Beast beneath the moonlight.” Dazai spoke with a smile he is all too familiar with. The smile that Chuuya—and him included—had learned to resent deeply.
“Dazai Osamu… You traitor.” Atsushi growls as his stance becomes offensive, yet Dazai remains unmoving.
Atsushi knows that never in a million years can he ever dream of beating him, but he never intended to anyway. He seeked nothing from the man, aside from forcing him to acknowledge Akutagawa, his… Friend, or perhaps rival is the better term?
“You have quite the fearsome reputation, Nakajima Atsushi.”
“Says the ex-Port Mafia executive Dazai Osamu, the demon prodigy who had taken in two orphaned proteges and left them both in the hands of his ex-partner.” Each word left his mouth with a bitter taste, he was certain he hated Dazai. And yet seeing him now… Seeing him stand against him… It felt right, that was surely something he would rather die agonizingly than admit.
Dazai’s smile stays, it doesn’t move at all. “Why are you so hung up on my old titles? They carry no meaning to me now.”
“They never carried any meaning to you. You acted as you please and you were an exception to almost every rule- even until now… They tremble at your name, Dazai. He trembles at your name, and I’m sure you take pride in that.”
That fact was certain. Dazai wasn’t afraid to instill fear upon someone if it meant getting what he wanted, after all, he had—he still does—an incredibly unique way of entering someone’s mind and never leaving it until the day death is merciful enough to sweep them off their feet.
Dazai’s presence brought you a never ending sense of either dread or peace, or sometimes you wouldn’t notice him at all which is what freaks people out when they realize. But Atsushi isn’t like most people- Dazai was his mentor for god knows how long and he has learned to identify things about him that only his partner could. It was odd to others, but Chuuya encouraged him.
It didn’t matter to him who you were because in the end, Dazai Osamu is an awful man who always gets what he wants. But Atsushi won’t put it above his ex-mentor… Living in the Port Mafia for even a week will cause some level of trauma, and plus… His mentor was only a kid then too.
Maybe he was too kind, or perhaps he’s not? It doesn’t matter, as much as he hated Dazai, he couldn’t bring himself to lunge and attack him.
Why can’t he at least attempt to hurt him? Dazai can easily dodge his attacks because no matter what happens, he will always still be better than the white reaper in more ways than one. Maybe that’s what bothered Atsushi… Knowing he can’t ever be as good as his mentor.
“I spent years waiting, Dazai. I knew you weren’t coming back but… I had hoped to at least hear something from you before you left! A small apology would have sufficed!” An apology for taking them in and forcing them into a path of evil… He had no home anyway, maybe it’s not entirely his fault. He was just a kid, but it can’t be Atsushi’s or Akutagawa’s. And it sure as hell isn’t Chuuya’s.
So instead he finds himself blaming Dazai, “I don’t ask for much. You know that! You forced me to bare my fangs and draw blood… To consume them… I wish we never met! You are the bane of my existence and everytime someone utters your name, I feel a sick knot twist in my stomach. What have you done to me, Dazai Osamu!?” What have you done to us? Atsushi thinks bitterly.
God it’s been so long since he spoke to his ex-mentor, even then, it wasn’t like this. If you told Atsushi then that he would be yelling at his mentor, he would’ve… What would he do? God. He wouldn’t do anything… He couldn’t do anything because, of course, his ex-mentor knew that Atsushi harbored a feeling for him that went beyond resentment. Maybe something a little more complicated than anger, or yearning for an apology… He wasn’t sure.
Dazai was silent. He couldn’t find the words to say. No, he does. So he steps forward, lightly touching Atsushi’s head, “...You’ve done well, Atsushi… I’m sorry.”
Atsushi fell to his knees. Though he was unscathed, thanks to Byakko—his oh so kind ability—he felt his heart shatter. He got what he wanted- he even got praised from it, so why? Why did it hurt? “...How can you still say that, Dazai?” He is years too late but if Atsushi needed to wait for an apology- he would. Dazai knew Atsushi and Akutagawa would wait for eternity if they had to, because they deserved a proper apology and they knew that.
“Oi… Shitty mackerel! Quit touching my ward with your godforsaken nasty, sweaty hands!” That voice. Aggressive and furious… Another familiar dark and grim presence.
“Chuuya, Ryuu…” Atsushi croaks out, he felt a lump in his throat so he bit his lip back.
Chuuya stands protectively in front of Atsushi, with Akutagawa standing behind him. Dazai stares at the three of them blankly, “So you think a small ‘I’m sorry’ could fix everything? Don’t make me fucking laugh, Dazai! ” At this point the other ADA members had taken a stance.
This aggravated Chuuya further, “It would take more than two words to convince us that you are even capable of feeling awful for doing what you did to us. Ryuunosuke, carry Atsushi, he’s exhausted and he can’t walk anymore.”
Dazai wanted to say something. Anything . He couldn’t let them leave like this, he needed to let them know he wanted to be a little better for them.
So he grits his teeth and yells, “Chuuya!”
‘Why… You can’t call my name again like how you used to back then. You betrayed them… You betrayed me.’ The mafioso thinks. “Chuuya… Please, turn around. I’m serious this time, I swear…” He whispers as he watches them leave. He looked like a small child begging for his parents not to leave him.
His head hung low and if any of his coworkers heard a small whimper, no one said anything.
The walk back to Atsushi’s apartment was tense with Atsushi on Akutagawa’s back and Chuuya walking just a bit ahead of them.
Each step was a reminder that Dazai will always be looming over their minds like some sort of god, or perhaps a demon would be more suited because at least a god would give them a peace of mind rather than reopening old wounds only to pour salt all over it.
Dazai was like a disease, an illness that won’t ever go away until it has taken everything from you. But at least illnesses go away, Dazai doesn’t. He’ll stay in your mind until you begin to lose your last bit of sanity. That’s how incredible his influence is. Worst part? Chuuya is almost certain that suicidal jerk doesn’t even care.
Maybe he does actually, but who’s to say? He’s almost never saying anything.
“Atsushi. Are you okay?” Chuuya asks him with such gentleness it seemed almost impossible to detect the rage hidden behind his soft tone, but Atsushi wasn’t like other ability users—he’s a tiger. He can sense whatever you feel in a way.
Atsushi lets out a low hum, “I’m fine. I’m just sore.”
“Of course you would be, after taking out half the organization in a day and sneaking around… I’m more shocked you even survived that.” You could hear the amusement in Chuuya’s voice, he was proud of Atsushi but most importantly- he was glad his protege was alright.
Akutagawa hums delightfully, “You did great, Jinko.”
“You two are an incredible duo, you know? I’m sure you two can become an even better version of double black.” Atsushi and Akutagawa knew what that tone meant. Chuuya was now thinking solemnly of the past and what could’ve been the greatest love story if Dazai hadn’t played around and left Chuuya to die and fend for himself in an organization of rabid dogs.
To be fair, Chuuya had already been a rabid dog, he just didn’t know how to deal with two puppies alone in a world where they could get themselves killed for even moving wrong or letting their guard down for even a second.
Chuuya wasn’t the best mentor, but he was the only one Dazai had trusted enough to keep his ex-proteges from going crazy.
“The best only deserves the best!” He told him, perhaps that is why he left.
Arriving at Atsushi’s apartment, it was dark. Incredibly dark…
“Goddamnit Atsushi, why the hell is it so dark?” The executive says as he fumbles around for the lightswitch which he doubts was ever used.
“I’m a tiger. I can see in the dark just fine, plus it lowers my electricity bills.” He says with a slight pained groan as Akutagawa not-so-kindly sets him down on his bed.
Chuuya let out a soft hum in response to the newfound information.
“Are you injured anywhere?” Akutagawa says as he kneels in front of the weretiger.
Akutagawa had always been softer, and more lenient towards Atsushi. He wasn’t sure why but maybe he does and he just didn’t want to jump to conclusions, “No, I’m fine.”
Perhaps in another life Akutagawa wouldn’t have even spared him a single glance if he bled out and died.
There was silence between the three of them. The type of silence that held heavy and unspoken words that didn’t need to be said.
“Atsushi.” Chuuya says.
“I’m fine. I’m more worried about you and Ryuu.” He replies, lying was never his strong suit but silence definitely was.
Akutagawa purses his lips, “I’m alright. I didn’t spend as much time with him as he did with you—plus, I was under Chuuya for most of my training.”
“Still…” Atsushi says solemnly. Akutagawa stands up and looks over to his mentor for help.
Chuuya kneels beside him, “He was my partner, and admittedly, seeing him hurt and it brings unwanted memories but then again—when am I not thinking of that bastard?”
“I should’ve been stronger.”
“You couldn’t have beaten him anyway, you know that.” Chuuya immediately retorts back.
Atsushi fell silent, it was true. The only one that can beat Dazai was Chuuya and neither of them was anywhere near Chuuya’s level of expertise.
Chuuya sighs, “I think you’re more bothered about this than Ryuu and I are.”
“...He hurt both of you.”
“And what about you? Are you not hurt too?” Chuuya tells him. It was times like these that Akutagawa finds himself sitting at the foot of Atsushi’s bed, placing a comforting hand on his legs.
Akutagawa hums, “We’re glad you care but Atsushi, we can handle a lot more. We worry about you because you never tell us anything.”
Atsushi knew he was just like him in a few little ways, and it was something he hated passionately.
The way his eyes would turn dull, or the way his expression would drop to an unreadable one. It was the little things too—like the way he’d sit seemingly relaxed but eyes scanning like a predator and his ears perked like some kind of wild animal.
Atsushi knew Chuuya hated that about him, “I’m just a little shaken up. I swear.”
Was he lying? He wasn’t sure.
Even he didn’t know anymore, and perhaps they knew hence why they choose not to pursue the issue any further.
For a while, they sat in silence.
None made a move to leave because through silence, they can hear the other’s true thoughts.