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Shauna doesn't know how she got here.
Currently she’s straddling Natalie Scatorccio while she does her skin care routine on him And yeah technically shauna knows how she got here since she lived through the events leading up to this, but still, feign innocence or whatever they say. If you told shauna she would be spending her weekend with Nat instead of her best friend like she had been planning to for weeks, she would undoubtedly believe you knowing she’d cancel plans to even lay eyes on Nat for even a second.
So as Shauna has Nat under her, eyes closed and relaxed, she decides she made the right choice like she always does when it comes to him.
“Shipman.” Nat whispers to get her attention.
“Huh?” Shauna realizes she stopped moving completely and has been staring at the Scatorccio child for way longer than she’d like to admit. Shauna focuses and has to hold back a choked noise from coming out of her mouth. Nat looks beautiful, With his stupid haircut and hazel eyes. The way he’s looking at her right now makes Nat look like a dog waiting for permission to do just about anything. She has the strange want to lean down and press a kiss right between his shoulder and neck, and she does. Remembering that she can.
Nat lets out a breathy giggle and it only fuels shauna to keep going, knowing she can make him make these sounds that nobody else can. Shauna spends a solid 2 minutes kissing up on him just to hear his giggle.
And when Shauna finally stops, she asks “Yes Nat? You wanted my attention?”
Natalie answers with a smile. “Its-“ He turns his head to look at Shauna’s alarm clock. “-its 8:16.” Shit. Shauna hurriedly gets off Nat and almost trips over the laundry she should’ve put away this morning. She shoots Nat a look when she hears him let out a snicker.
“Nat get dressed, we're going to the diner. You need to eat cmon.” Shauna can hear Nat sigh. She knows she’s being pushy about this but Natalie is on this eating schedule for a reason, and Shauna has the fear that if she doesn't keep him on it he’ll go back to how he was before.
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Shauna opens the door for Nat to her jeep and bows while she does it.
“My knight in shining armor.” Nat says as he slides into the car, and Shauna winks at him before she walks over to the driver's seat. Who knew she could have so much charisma around him. When she starts the car, Natalie is already looking through the cd’s she keeps in the car just for him. She knows he’s gonna put on a nirvana album, it's one of his favorite bands and he seems in the mood for it. She puts the car in drive and puts her hand on the back of the passenger seat to reverse as she hears I hate myself and want to die start to play.
“In Utero? Really Natalie?” Shauna hasn't really listened to nirvana for long, Natalie introduced her to it but she knows that Bleach is her favorite album.
“Its a good album, you just have bad taste.” He shoots back.
“I never said it was a bad album, ‘Talie. Im just saying bleach is better.” She replies back, focused on the road.
“You are inherently insane.”
“Well this inherently insane girl is about to buy you dinner in about 10 minutes so quiet yourself.” Nat has gotten better at letting people buy things for him, so he laughs and quiets down. For the next five minutes the only sound in the car is Nirvana and her girlfriends humming. Once shauna begins to pull into the diner though, the comfortable silence is broken.
“We need to buy more cd’s. We really only have Nirvana and bikini kill.” He abruptly says.
“By we, you mean me?” She jokes.
Natalie gently slaps the hand Shauna has on the glove compartment. “No you asshole, i have some money saved up. I wanna go get you a cd you want or somethin’.” And at that Shauna shoots her girlfriend a smile while she parks.
“So cd date? Sounds nice. How about next weekend? It’d be a nice way to unwind after the friday game. I’ll buy you one too.”
“The whole point is for you to not buy me anything baby.” Shauna steps out of the car while Nat is mid sentence.
“Hm? What? I can't hear you?” She mocks and tilts her head.
“Shauna i swear to god.” Comes a muffled Nat.
“What?” She says loudly as she walks toward the entrance to the diner, drawing the attention of a couple people. Nat gets out of the car quickly and jogs to shauna.
“You’re a dickhead.” He says out of breath. Shauna wonders how her girlfriend even plays on the soccer team with how often he smokes.
“You love me.” She smiles and gives Natalie a quick kiss. She hears him let out a hum.
“So where are we sitting tonight?” Natalie always picks where they sit. Shauna doesn't have a preference and Natalie likes to have a sense of control. So when he just starts walking to a booth, she follows him. To be fair she would follow him to the ends of the earth if he asked but he hasn't, so she’ll just follow him to the corner booth of the only diner in town. She sits down next to him and immediately puts her hand in his. Strangely enough Shauna's hands are bigger than her girlfriends, no issue with it but it makes hand holding fun for Nat.
“Can i order for you this time?” Natalie asks genuinely.
“You dont even know what i want.”
“Shauna you order the same thing everytime we come here.” He rolls his eyes.
“Okay well i wouldn't have to if we didn't come here so often.” She replies in a lighthearted tone.
He gives her a blank stare. “Babe neither of us can cook and the only other place to eat here is a mcdonalds and a fancy restaurant we cant even afford.” She hums in agreement just as the waitress comes up.
“What can i get you both?” Shauna squeezes her girlfriends hand and gives her the ‘well go ahead’ look.
“One pancake special with scrambled eggs slightly browned and 2 sausages, and the chicken tenders with a basket of fries please.” Okay so maybe he knew what she wanted.
“Also some applejuice.” Oh he really knew what she wanted.
“Great! I’ll be right back with that drink and go put that order in.”
As soon as the waitress walks away shauna opens her mouth. “Fuck you.” She smiles at him.
“I told you, you’re very predictable shipman.” He lets out in the normal smokers voice he usually has.
“Im not predictable, you’re just gay and always around me, ‘Talie.”
“That too.” He places a gentle kiss on her cheek. “Im gonna go outside for a quick smoke, will you be okay?”
“Mm, no my heart will yearn for your presence and tear away at itself trying to get closer to you.” She smirks and continues “Yes i’ll be fine. Go smoke.” she sends him a smile and Nat rolls his eyes while he walks away from the table.
Now that she’s alone with her thoughts she’s not very sure what to do with herself. Her hand feels cold without Natalie's hand in it. Her side feels cold without his radiating heat. She pulls her phone out her pocket and checks her texts.
‘So hows the weekend lovebird?’ Is the first text that shows up. Obviously from jackie. She replies ‘jackie shush, however, we’re going on a cd date next weekend :)’ she puts her phone back in her pocket right as it pings again. She would answer that immediately but her chronic pain has decided to act up in her arm. The once tolerable slight buzzing sensation has turned into a vibrating warm painful mess, and Nat has her pills for it. He always keeps them in the left pocket of leather jacket that he’s owned for years and smells like cigarettes and faintly of beer. The waiter finally comes back and sets her apple juice down just as Nat walks back in.
“Food will be out in a minute.”
Nat slides back into the booth and grabs Shauna's hand. She hisses, the touch sending a wave of pain up her arm.
“Shit, I'm sorry I should have left these with you huh?” He reaches in his left pocket and gives her the pills her doctor prescribed.
“No it's okay, I didn't really remind you.” Shauna puts the pill in her mouth and chases it with apple juice, hating the way the pill tastes. He hums and gives her a kiss.
“Oh gross Nat, cigarette taste. I hate that.”
“I know but you love me and put up with said cigarette taste all the time, so deal with it again just this once.”
The food arrives and they say their thanks like any good person does.
“Anddd, we’re right on time. 9 on the dot.”
“Just be glad i'm eating.” He lets out with a joking smile.
“I always am.” She says before she digs into her pancakes. Sadly she lets out a satisfied moan in the middle of the diner but she cant help it, the pancakes are so good.
“Shipman, not even I make you moan like that, I swear the pancakes are not that good.”
“They’re an acquired taste, ‘Talie.”
“You’re an acquired taste, Shaun.” He lets out a belly laugh. Nothing was even that funny but Shauna can't help but let out the same laugh. Being with Nat in general makes her giddy and she loosens up way more, she returns the same vulnerability he offers her.
“I kinda wanna go to bed early, just to hold each other. Can we do that?” She asks, remembering how much she missed his touch when he left to smoke. “Yeah sure, whatever you want baby. I'm getting a bit tired anyway.” She smiles to herself, knowing that on the ride back he’s gonna fall asleep and she’ll have to carry him inside.
Okay well she won't have to but, she’ll want to. So she will.
“Did you throw away the cigarette or just stomp it out and leave it there?”
“I disposed of it properly, you nature fairy.”
“Good, I taught you well.” she says, finishing her food. Before Nat used to just leave his cigarettes on the ground, he never really cared for nor thought about nature when he did so. When they started dating though, Shauna made sure to fix that habit of his.
“Let me go pay then we’ll go. Wanna go sit in the car?” She offers.
“Mhm, don't worry, I won't put on In utero this time.”
“You better not.” She hands him her keys and gets up.
She pays and tips the waitress about $15. Not too little, not too much. It's practically her lucky tipping number. Shauna steps out of the diner and can hear the second song on the bleach album playing. She opens her door and immediately goes to kiss him.
“Let's get going, it's about 9:45, we’ll be in bed by 10:30 at the latest.” Natalie only lets out a hum and a small okay.
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The drive back home is silent, nothing but humming and nirvana playing. Shauna is spacing out at this point, paying attention to nothing but the road. She pulls into her driveway and looks over to Nat. Sure enough, he’s sleeping. So she takes the cd out of the player and puts it back in the case. Placing it back in the glove compartment and turning off the car. She gets out and goes to his side of the car, doing her usual motions every time he falls asleep in her car.
She picks him up and it wakes him, she can tell but he loves being carried by her so he won't say anything. Shauna practically has Nat on her hip, held up only by his arms around her neck and her hand under his ass.
“Natalie i know you’re awake, so shift yourself a bit i need to open the door.”
Nat proceeds to let out a groggy. “I don't wanna, suck my dick.”
“You don't have one and even if you did you know I would. Now shift your ass.”
She finally gets the door open, gets inside, shuts and locks it all in record time.
“You’re so lucky i love you, it took me like 10 minutes to get the door open.”
“Two minutes actually.”
“Whatever you say.”
Shauna carries him to her room door and slightly kicks it open, happy they have the house to themself this weekend. She sets him down.
“You’re heavy as hell.”
“I'm 120 pounds, shut up.”
She sticks her tongue out at him and goes to change.
“I'm assuming you don't wanna shower, do you want your regular pj’s?”
“Shauna i wear boxers and one of your t-shirts to bed, i don't count those as pj’s.” He says, tone lighthearted and most certainly happy.
“Shut up. Take your clothes off.” Tone also lighthearted. She throws some boxers and a purple Lauryn Hill shirt that Taissa bought her right at her girlfriend's face. She sheds her dress that she put on to go to the diner. Throwing it on the floor with the rest of her clothes.
“Well damn shipman, right now?” Shauna’s face burns, she didn't realize the implications of what she said in the moment.
“Not like that dumbass! Put the clothes on!”
He laughs and says okay, putting the shirt on and changing his boxers to the ones Shauna gave him, Shauna does the same. Except she just puts on an oversized shirt with nothing but panties on. The usual for sleeping.
She climbs in bed and opens her arms for her girlfriend to climb into. Nat loves being held and she’s made note of this, but she always asks.
“Do you wanna be held or do you wanna hold me?”
“You know the answer.” He replies. Shauna lets out a soft laugh because she did know. He climbs into her arms and wraps his arms around her middle. Pressing his face into her chest. She can feel him smiling.
“Don't say some stupid shit about my tits to ruin the moment.” He giggles a bit and shakes his head. “I wasn't gonna, I wanted to say I love you. Thank you for caring for me, especially with me you know what.” He means his eating disorder. Of course she cares, he’s her girlfriend. She’d care even if he wasn't, and she says so.
“‘Talie, you’re my girlfriend. Of course I'm going to care about you, matter a fact you’re the person I care about the most. I love you too, don't ever think i don't.”
“I wouldn't even dream of it.” His voice muffled from being pressed against her shirt, and for the millionth time today Natalie makes her smile.
“Oh gross I'm being sappy.” He says suddenly.
“You’re the sappiest person I know, shut up and go to sleep.”
He lets out his last laugh of the night. “Yes ma’am.”
And when they wake up in the morning, bodies tangled together like yarn. Shauna will enjoy the sunlight that seeps through the blinds. Sure, that the person sleeping next to her will be the only lover she sleeps next to for the rest of their lives.