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“Let me get this straight,” Hanbin says slowly. “You’re trying to figure out how to ask Jiwoong-hyung out. On a date. And this is your solution?”

“Shush! He’s right there!” Matthew scowls, glancing at the counter of the café they’re seated in, where his crush, Kim Jiwoong, takes a customer’s order. Hanbin fails to stifle a giggle behind his hand. “Yah, hyung! Don’t make fun of me!” he whines. “Even Minho is in on it!”

Hanbin raises an eyebrow. “Yang Minho? Really, now?”

Matthew crosses his arms. “It’s not the worst idea in the world,” he defends himself. “I mean, the worst that can happen is that we fail miserably.”

“Is Minho asking Jiwoong out, or…?”

“Obviously not! He’s terrified of being rejected if he says it outright, so he’s going along with this plan to ask out Jaeyun!”

“Uh. Which one?”

“How many do you know that Minho is friends with?” Matthew throws his hands up exasperatedly.

“I’m sure if I thought about it, I would figure it out.”

“Moon Jaeyun,” he sighs. Hanbin is definitely teasing him now. “Who else?”

“Ooh, they’re cute together,” Hanbin nods approvingly. “But are you sure this plan won’t blow up in your face? You know I love you, Seokmae, but this sounds a little…ridiculous.”

“More ridiculous than going tietie—”

“Okay, you win!” Hanbin interrupts, ears turning red. “I still say I have a right to question how logical a WikiHow article is supposed to be, though.”

Displayed on Matthew’s phone is the said WikiHow article. Matthew entirely blames Lee Jeonghyeon and his stupidly hot boyfriend for all the ridiculousness that he is about to commit when he sees the way Hanbin reads it and looks up at him dubiously, probably questioning all of the life choices that led him to being Matthew’s best friend and soulmate. Probably. Maybe.

How To Ask Your Crush on a Date
Get closer to your crush and find the right time to express your feelings
Written by Imad Jbara | Edited by Luke Smith, MFA

Nervous about asking your crush out? You’re definitely not alone—we’ve all been there before. Asking your crush out (or even just talking to them) can be intimidating, but we’re here to help make it easier! We’ll walk you through how to ask the big question to land that date, plus how to find just the right moment to ask and how to get to know your crush better beforehand to up your chances of success. We’ll also offer some handy advice about dealing with nerves and rejection so you’re fully prepared for the big moment.

This article is based on interview with our professional relationship coach, Imad Jbara. Check out the full interview here.

“It’s all good advice, but—”

“If it’s good advice, I’m taking it,” Matthew declares. “I am desperate here, hyung. Not everyone clicks with your twin flame like you and Zhang Hao-hyung!”

“We—” Hanbin stops, giving Matthew a fondly exasperated look. “You’re so stubborn. I don’t think I can stop you from doing anything, can I?”

“Nope,” Matthew grins. “You just have to watch me get Jiwoon-hyung to date me with the help of this!” he pauses. “And hope I’m right about Jaeyun also being head over heels for Minho, I suppose.”

∞

“I don’t know why you guys are so convinced your crushes don’t like you back,” Myungho folds his arms across his chest. “It’s literally not that hard to tell.”

“Says you who drunk-confessed to Yoonsung literally two weeks ago,” Minho shoots back. Myungho sputters, trying and failing to come up with a proper answer or any defense at all. “Unfortunately, some of us aren’t convinced that drunkenly crying about how much you care about them will work.”

“Hey, unfair!” Myungho protests. “I was going through some. Deep shit, okay?”

“Yeah, I know,” Minho says serenely. “Exactly why you shouldn’t have gotten drunk.”

“No wonder you’re into Jaeyun,” the older groans. Minho would be concerned that Myungho will kick him out of the room, except this is Minho’s dorm room and if anything, Minho can kick him out. “You two are so annoying.”

“Let me finish reading the article!” Minho shushes him.

Things You Should Know

Get to know your crush a little before asking them out to improve your chances. Introduce yourself, or invite them to hang out with your friend group.

“You two are best friends already,” Myungho points out. “You’re both in the same friend group. That is basically useless advice.”

“Shush!”

Find an opportunity when your crush is relaxed, and ask them out in person and in private, where there’s less pressure from an audience.

“Jaeyun’s probably going to drag me along if he even gets the hint that you’re going to confess,” Myungho muses, “so be careful how you phrase your confession or I’ll never let you live it down.”

“Bold of you to assume you’ll ever figure out when,” Minho snarks, shoving him in the shoulder.

Ask them to a particular event or activity, like going to a concert or museum, which gives them a concrete plan and makes it easier to say ‘yes.’

“Ooh!” Minho perks up. “There’s the music festival this weekend! Do you think I should ask him to go with me, hyung?”

“Isn’t he on the planning committee? He’ll be going anyway. As are the rest of us.”

“I could ask him to just, walk around with me, and have fun,” Minho insists. “You know how he gets when he’s focused on something. It’ll be good for him to unwind and have fun!”

“Good point,” Myungho concedes, leaning over to peer at the screen as Minho scrolls through the article. After a few seconds, he says, “I can’t help but notice how only part of that applies to you.”

“Hm, yeah,” Minho responds absentmindedly, going to open his text log with Matthew. “That’s why we’re only using the parts that do apply to us.”

석우현

| myungho-hyung thinks we’re stupid

hanbin-hyung thinks we’re stupid too |
but with affection |

| I think I work better with method 1
| what about you

I was just going to say |
I’m going for the first one as well |
it’s more helpful than the others |

| please don’t fuck it up 🙏🙏

as IF |

| anyway
| you know how there’s tips to take your crush places
| what if. the music festival over the weekend
| jaeyun already works as part of the team organizing it

ooh that’s a good idea |
woo them through the power of music |

| sort of
| kind of
| I hope

it’s this weekend though |
I don’t really feel like springing the music festival on him |
not out of literally nowhere |

| idk ask him to hang out with you for a bit?
| the first step says ask him out
| he’d be down to do something with you

I think I have an idea |
a lowkey dumb one and sort of cowardly |
but an idea! |

∞

Method 1 of 3: Asking Your Crush on a Date

1. Take a few deep breaths to calm yourself before you ask. It can be really hard to admit your feelings to someone that you like a lot. It’s a big step! Calm yourself by focusing on your breathing, or even just by focusing on what’s going on around you instead of what you’re going to do. If you think you’re getting cold feet, remember that your crush is just a person, too, and they get nervous too sometimes.

If you can’t bring yourself to do it, set yourself an incentive. Say, “I need to ask them out before Friday, or else I can’t go to the party on Friday night.” Give yourself a reason to cut through your hesitation.

Well, that’s helpful, Matthew thinks a little sarcastically. He definitely isn’t going to ask Jiwoong out on a date, but sort of a precursor to it.  But it is helpful to have an actual reminder that his anxiety will not swallow him whole if he just. Steps up and asks Jiwoong if he would grant Matthew a few minutes of his time.

He cringes at how that sounds. He needs to get his act together.

He thinks about his more romantically-adept friends. Hanbin is kind of out of question. His bond with Zhang Hao is something straight out of fated-lovers legends and he would much rather not tackle something like that. There’s Keita, his roommate in the year above, except he hasn’t dated in a long time and Matthew doesn’t quite know how to ask Terazono Keita of all people for help.

There is Taerae. He and Park Hanbin are disgustingly in love—and as far as Matthew knows, they started dating because of an accidental kiss. Not what Matthew aims to do here.

Give yourself an incentive. Well, here’s an incentive—if he doesn’t do this now, he’ll chicken out by the time the music festival rolls around in…five days. Sure, there are chances after that, but he knows that Jiwoong has a love for music and dance, the same way Matthew does, and it’s a special event.

And Matthew definitely won’t have the courage after that.

Taking a deep breath, he strides forward and enters the café. It’s been two days since he has been here, frantically working through all the most urgent assignments he has so he can dedicate a few days to the task of getting Jiwoong to date him, at least until the rest of the assignments catch up to him. That’s a problem for future Matthew.

The café has enough patrons that Jiwoong and the girl working with him on the shift—one of Matthew’s classmates, a loud, strong-willed girl by the name of Huh Yunjin—are fully occupied. His heart sinks. So much for getting Jiwoong’s attention. It’s dusk; of course, there are people around.

He would just leave, maybe try again another day (a lie), but Jiwoong notices him. He curses internally when Jiwoong flashes him a bright smile and waves. “You don’t look happy to see me,” he quips when Matthew sucks it up and heads over to the counter.

“Why would I be happy to see the bearer of all the worst jokes in the world?” Matthew retorts.

“Ah, but I make your order the way you like it,” Jiwoong grins. Matthew can’t help but grin back at him, his sulky mood evaporating. “What will it be today?”

Matthew decides to take a leap of faith. He can hear Jaeyun giggling at him in his head and is very glad that it’s Minho who will be hearing about this, who will at least do him the honor of trying to not laugh. Even if he will fail.

“Honestly, I didn’t come here to order anything,” he confesses. Jiwoong’s brow rises. “I just wanted to talk to you, actually. But you’re so busy right now…”

“Oh?” Jiwoong blinks slowly. “That’s—no, actually, I’m free.”

“No, you’re not,” Matthew gestures at the people. “You and Yunjin are—”

“My and Yunjin’s shift is over and the kids over there are going to take over,” Jiwoong says, pointing behind Matthew. He turns to see a pair of boys enter the café, one blonde and the other dark-haired, both of them bickering about something. The blonde wears an expression Matthew knows well, for he wears it himself often: exasperation lined with fondness, while his companion just looks pouty—sulky.

“Oh.” Matthew turns back to Jiwoong. “So.”

“Yep,” Jiwoong isn’t the type of man to smirk; he just grins brightly. “Give me a second to pass the reins over to them and I’ll join you. Get a seat over in the corner or they won’t let me breathe for staying here with you.”

Matthew’s face feels warm at the implications of that, but he’s reached his bravery quota for now. He does what Jiwoong says and scurries over to a table in the corner.

∞

Minho’s grand plan to make asking Jaeyun to go to the festival with him sound completely normal: ask if he can hang around and help with the preparations.

It’s no doubt going to be boring as hell but Minho has always liked a challenge. A voice that sounds like Yoonsung’s teasing one in his head says that Jaeyun himself is a challenge. He steadfastly ignores it.

“Hello, Jaeyun!” Minho chirps cheerfully as soon as Jaeyun enters the dorm room, draping an arm around his shoulder. “How are you doing today?”

Jaeyun gives him a side-eye. “Suffocating because you’re choking me. And you saw me hours ago for lectures. What’s wrong with you?”

Minho pouts. “I can’t even ask you a genuine question,” he laments, “that’s how cruel you are!”

“I’m too tired for your theatrics, and anyway, you’re not this dramatic for no reason,” Jaeyun sighs, pushing Minho off, but he also loops an arm around Minho’s and tugs him towards the bed, where he unkindly shoves Minho and takes the singular chair in the room. “What do you want?”

Minho drops the theatrics. “Wanna let me help you with the festival planning stuff?” he asks as casually as he can. Jaeyun stares him. “Hey, what’s with the look?”

“You did turn down the offer when the sign-up sheets were sent out,” Jaeyun says. “What changed your mind now?” His eyes narrow. “Is this why you wanted me to come over?”

“That, and I also wanted to watch a drama I’ve been meaning to watch,” he says, holding up his phone with the Netflix page opened up to see. Entirely true. Sort of. Halfway.

“Sure, I don’t mind,” Jaeyun accedes easily—he pretends to be tired of Minho all the time but he is actually quite soft when it comes to Minho, he’s learned—but he isn’t willing to back down. “But answer the question.”

Minho shrugs. “Since I’m going for the second year in a row, I thought it would be stupid of me to not at least learn how it works behind the scenes.” He has to be honest if he wants to make this work, and he isn’t lying as he says that. He also doesn’t lie when he says, “and, well. I want to spend more time with you. I feel like a lot of things we do are centered around my interests. Not yours.”

He expects Jaeyun to stare at him again, but then his friend starts laughing. “Don’t make it sound like you force me into anything, idiot,” he says. “If you wanted to spend more time with me, you can just say it without all of these—setups.”

“Ugh, Jaeyun,” he whines, “don’t make me say sappy stuff!”

“You are a true idiot,” Jaeyun isn’t laughing so much as he is giggling, eyes crinkled up in mischief. “I can’t believe you would ever feel that way! Do you really think I would stay quiet if I felt I was being wronged in any way?”

“Truthfully? Yes. You hate disappointing or upsetting people. Especially when you’re close to them.”

That stops Jaeyun’s laughter. He blinks once, twice. Minho stares back, hoping he hadn’t just given away too much of his heart with his fond smile, with the way he says those words like he knows Jaeyun as well as the back of his own hand—and he does, god help him, he does.

“Fair,” Jaeyun says finally. “I would say I’m surprised you know me so well, but. I’m not.”

Minho smiles. “I know you well enough,” he says. “That’s exactly how I know that, for all your questions, you aren’t going to refuse me if I say I really want to see how the festival works.”

So much for not saying sappy stuff.

“Yeah, I won’t,” Jaeyun accepts the observation easily. He rises to his feet and walks over. “Shove off and give me some space if you really wanna watch that drama. You can come with me tomorrow afternoon, when classes are over with.”

Grinning, Minho moves to give Jaeyun space on the cramped bed. Now, he just needs another day or two to figure out how to ask Jaeyun to the actual festival. On a date.

Tomorrow.

∞

2. Be direct about your feelings to make your intentions clear. Instead of dropping hints and hoping they get the message, just tell them how you feel. Being vague might make them think you just want to be their friend instead of going out with them. It might be scary, but it also makes things so much more straightforward. Start with something like, “hey, I like you a lot.” Avoid dramatic statements like “I think I’m in love with you,” which might me too much, too soon.

Putting your own feelings out there first can be intimidating, but making that first move and showing vulnerability makes it much easier for the other person to be vulnerable, too. Who knows, they might even be hoping that you’ll ask them out!

Matthew watches Jiwoong and Yunjin talk to the two boys briefly before Yunjin grabs a handbag under the counter, says a goodbye, and walks out of the café, while Jiwoong…disappears into the back room after throwing a smile at him.

Matthew feels a little bit more than nervous about that. Nervously, he taps a beat on the floor with his foot, eyes trained on the door Jiwoong had disappeared through. Naturally, he’s startled when the man reappears and suppresses a grin when he realizes that Matthew had very obviously been staring at the spot since he had gone through.

Approaching, Jiwoong puts down a tall glass of milkshake. “Strawberry,” he says. In his hand is another glass for himself. “I usually make some before Ricky comes over for his shift. He lives off it.”

Matthew sips it. It’s cold and sweet. “Why?” he asks.

“Why he lives off it?”

“Well, I meant why do you make it, but also that, I guess,” he laughs. Jiwoong laughs along with him, embarrassed, as he takes the seat across from Matthew.

“Ricky hates caffeine and basically worships strawberries,” he says. “He also has an awful sleep schedule—he’s an art student and tends to be awake literally whenever, for hours on end, to get as much as he can done on his projects and assignments. At least sugar will keep him awake before he crashes. Besides, he likes it enough that I don’t feel like I’m wasting my time doing it for him.”

“You’re fond of him,” Matthew notes, endeared by the way he talks of his junior.

“I am,” Jiwoong confirms. “Not as much as I’m fond of you, though.”

“Yah, hyung!” Matthew complains. “You can’t just say things like that!”

“Why not?”

“Just…” he flounders. It’s times like these that he really properly registers the four-year age gap between them and how Jiwoong has more experience than him with these things. He’s only known Jiwoong for about half a year now—the amount of time Jiwoong has spent working here, right from almost the end of his final year of university—and it’s a little disconcerting to think that he’s still learning, discovering things that don’t faze anyone else. Including the fact that he must have experience with dating around and all. “It’s embarrassing!” 

Jiwoong’s laugh is soft and affectionate. “You should’ve thought of that before you decided to spend your time with me like this,” he teases. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think this was a date.”

Matthew’s brain almost screeches to a halt. Almost.

Then he remembers the second step: be direct about your feelings.

He takes the plunge.

“Maybe this is a date,” he says, watching Jiwoong’s expression change from teasing to surprise. The older man quickly swallows the milkshake he has in his mouth, opening it to say something; tries and fails to start a sentence twice, thrice. Matthew likes the way he’s so often the one throwing Jiwoong for a loop.

“You’re bolder than I thought,” Jiwoong finally manages to get out. He appraises Matthew with a new light in his eyes.

“I always was bold,” Matthew says. “I just don’t quite know what to do with myself when I’m around you.” He grins, large and unrestrained. “Would you reject me if I said this is a date?”

“No,” it takes not even a moment for Jiwoong to respond with a grin of his own. “You’re a shrewd little thing, Seok Matthew. Asking me out on a date at my workplace.”

“Easiest and most accessible place,” Matthew says. “Would you mind if I kept coming back for dates?”

“Not at all,” Jiwoong’s eyes gleam with something like eagerness and satisfaction—and he looks at Matthew so fondly. Matthew has been friends with Hanbin long enough to know that look when he sees it directed at him and he loves it.

“Then, I’ll be back often enough,” he sips the milkshake, returning the look tenfold.

∞

“This is chaos,” Minho comments, looking around at the field. The organizers are scattered around all over the place, running from one table to another. There’s lots of those everywhere, every one of them covered with things—be it papers or the decorations they’re stringing through the trees on the outskirts. There’re three or four vans, too, and a crew is in the middle of setting up a stage in the middle of the field. “How do you keep up?”

The field in question is only a few blocks away from the university and the adjacent dormitories, and is actually two football fields with the fence between them taken down. Minho’s only been here once.

“Everyone has a job,” Jaeyun says, leading him through the chaos. He has his hand clasped around Minho’s and it’s a struggle to not feel even a little embarrassed when eyes turn to them but none of them linger. He keeps his hand in Jaeyun’s, though. “It’s stressful but it’s a controlled sort of chaos.”

“Ooh. What do you do around here?” Minho asks, craning his neck to get a proper view of everything. He sees several student volunteers sorting through a bunch of papers and several more stringing fairy lights through the trees. One tall boy holds onto another perched on a ladder, fixing a bulb to the tree. Jaeyun beelines straight for them.

“Hi,” he greets, “didn’t expect to see you two out of bed so early.”

The boys turn—or rather, the one on the stepladder tries and nearly falls over. The other grabs ahold of him to keep him steady. “Good morning, hyung,” he says. “I’m honored you have so much faith in us. Who’s this?”

“This is my friend,” Jaeyun pushes him forward. “Say hi.”

“What am I, a child?” Minho complains, tugging his hand free of Jaeyun’s. He turns to the boys. “Hi. I’m Yang Minho. Jaeyun brought me along to see how the festival works.”

“Cho Kyungmin,” the one who had spoken says. He has a squirrel-like look to him with his fluffy brown-dyed hair—and he’s taller than Minho. Why are kids taller than him? “This is Jung Haemin. We’re still in high school but we’re graduating soon.”

Minho gazes up at the tree. “I’ve never really thought about how much work goes into making the place the way it is for the festival night. It’s incredible to see all of this.”

“Then you can help out,” Jaeyun says cheerfully, waving goodbye to the high schoolers as he takes Minho’s hand again and takes to a table stacked high with fairy lights and wires. “It is what you’re here for, right?”

“Not quite,” Minho blurts out without thinking. He doesn’t take it back. “I just…wanted to spend more time with you.”

Jaeyun lifts an eyebrow. “As you’ve said before.”

Be direct about your feelings. God. Minho feels incredibly stupid relying on the stupid WikiHow article for this. It had been Matthew’s idea, except it was actually Matthew’s classmate’s idea and Minho had just decided to go along with it. If anything, the damn thing is giving him a better-structured idea of how to go about this.

“No, I mean—” he sucks in a breath, reaching out to begin untangling the lights. “I wanted to. I want to be with you. Um.” His ears are on fire as he tries to form the right words. “Just with you.”

“You’re going to have to make more sense,” Jaeyun pokes him in the side, but when Minho looks over, his eyes are wide and he looks like a wind might knock him over. He’s getting the drift.

He takes another breath. “I like you. That’s why I wanted to spend more time with you.”

Silence. Minho bites his lip, tugs free a string of lights. He winds it around his shoulder and reaches for another when Jaeyun finally speaks up.

“It took you this long to say anything,” he mutters. “God, Yang Minho. Myungho-hyung was so convinced you like me and I was so convinced he was wrong and now I know he was right.”

“Hey!” Minho protests, incredulous laughter bubbling up from his throat. “What was I supposed to do? Just tell you out of nowhere?”

“Technically, that is what’s happening here,” Jaeyun says, taking the wire he has already untangled. “I didn’t expect this to happen today, but.”

“You have to give me an answer,” Minho demands. “Reject me outright if you have to!”

“I’m not rejecting you,” Jaeyun’s voice is steady but he is looking stubbornly at the table and his ears are just as red as Minho’s, “because I like you too.”

“Oh,” Minho breathes out. His heart is tapping a fast-paced beat against his ribcage and his hands are slightly shaky, but he feels lighter than he has felt all morning. “That’s…yeah. I didn’t expect that but.”

“I’ll go get a ladder,” Jaeyun says suddenly, shoving the light into his hands, pivoting on his heel and marching away.

“Yah, Moon Jaeyun!” Minho yells after him. More than a few heads turn and Minho must be insane because he can’t believe he’s actually doing this. “Are we dating, or what?”

Jaeyun turns. He’s grinning, eyes sparkling. His chest heaves with the giggles he struggles to suppress. “We are, I guess!” he calls back. And then he’s running for a van and stepping inside while Minho watches like an idiot.

He exhales slowly, reminding himself that he has work to do. He didn’t just come here to ask Jaeyun out. Well, he did, but he isn’t an asshole and he does want to help.

That doesn’t mean he doesn’t have a stupid grin on his face as he stands there untangling more strings of fairy lights.

∞

3. Ask your crush to do something specific with you. Instead of stopping at, “do you want to go out with me?” ask them to join you on a particular activity. Suggest something fun and cheap that you’ll both enjoy, like going to a movie, a hike, a museum, or a school event. You might also ask them to hang out at your house, or to have a picnic together at the park.

If there is a school dance coming up, ask your crush to go as your date. This is a great opportunity to show someone how you feel.

Matthew and Jiwoong have had only one date since that night—tonight—because university has a special way of kicking your ass when you least expect it—or just education, in general. As it turned out, making a half-assed job of an essay backfired on him, and he had to redo it. He’s lucky that he was given the chance to redo it at all.

Hence the reason he pulls two all-nighters just to finish the damn thing properly this time.

Now, he sits tiredly at the table in the corner, drinking his iced Americano slowly in an attempt to keep himself occupied. He’s past the point of being sleepy. He just wants to power off. For the rest of his life. Unfortunately, that would mean he couldn’t take Jiwoong to the festival and Hanbin wouldn’t know how to go on without Matthew, anyway.

Across from his sits Keita, who physically wrangled him out of his room to get some sunlight and air, so Matthew takes it as an opportunity to text Jiwoong, who does the afternoon shift, that he’d be there, but the older man hasn’t arrived yet.

“Where’s your boyfriend?” Keita asks, biting into the peach Danish he bought just to try it. “Ooh, this tastes good.”

“He’s not my boyfriend yet,” Matthew says. “Ask me that when you get the balls to ask Woonggi out.”

“Already did,” Keita says, startling Matthew, who leans forward with wide eyes. “Last night, to be specific. He was very happy about accepting, if you must know.”

“I told you so,” Matthew returns, exactly what he had said he would say half a year ago when he found out Keita and Woonggi were playing a game of flirting and dancing around each other but were convinced the other wasn’t really into them that way. Keita throws a tissue at him.

“By the way, Hanbin told me you’re using a literal WikiHow article to ask the guy out,” he says. “I’m not sure whether to believe him or not.”

“As a matter of fact, I am,” Matthew admits. When he’s this loopy from a lack of sleep, he has no capacity to feel embarrassment for the look Keita gives him. “Hyung, if you must know,” he mimics the older man’s tone, “I am willing to do a lot if it means successfully asking him out. We already had one date, actually.”

“But you said—”

“He’s not my boyfriend yet,” Matthew emphasizes. “We’ve only had one date! And this is our second, when he gets here. The early afternoon is quiet enough that Yunjin can handle the customers and she’ll cover for Jiwoon-hyung.”

“You still can’t pronounce his name right,” Keita notes. Matthew throws the tissue back at him. “Don’t be so prickly. You’re going to ask him when?”

“At the festival,” Matthew glances at his cup and grimaces when he sees that more than half the drink is still left. And it’s not as cold anymore. “Speaking of which, shove off, he’ll be here soon.”

“Okay, rude,” Keita scoffs. Then he says, “I have to meet Woonggi anyway. You’ll be back soon, won’t you? You’re so sleep deprived you might as well become a walking corpse.”

“Sure, hyung,” Matthew nods, dropping the teasing façade. “See you later.”

Keita slings his backpack and heads off, leaving Matthew to keep sipping at his coffee. He only has to sit there for another five minutes before Jiwoong is entering the café, calling a hello to Yunjin, and he spots Matthew a second later, waving with a soft grin.

“Give me a minute,” he calls over, sliding behind the counter and telling Yunjin something. She responds with a raised eyebrow, but nods regardless. Then she looks over at Matthew and smirks.

Matthew looks away, fiddling with his almost-empty cup. He would have the decency to be embarrassed more than he is right now if he was actually running on more than two hours of sleep.

When Jiwoong comes back, it’s with another Americano for Matthew and nothing for himself. “I ran into your friend outside,” he says, “and I was informed that you are running on two hours of sleep over two days.”

Damn Keita. “Thanks,” he says regardless, accepting it. “What about you?”

“I just woke up and ate, it’s fine,” Jiwoong shakes his head. “You’ve been busy, right? Didn’t even text me for two days!”

Matthew starts to defend himself, and then he realizes that Jiwoong is only teasing him. “I screwed up one of my assignments and had to redo them,” he tells Jiwoong, gesturing to his eyebags. “Stayed awake for two nights straight.”

“That’s tough,” Jiwoong says sympathetically. “I would’ve helped you if you’d told me.”

“I didn’t tell anyone, I just wanted to get it over with properly this time,” Matthew admits. “And as fast as I could. I wanted to see you.”

“Don’t prioritize me over your health,” Jiwoong scolds. “Sleep is very important, you know.”

“I’ll just sleep all day tomorrow since I have no classes,” Matthew says. Here we go. “And actually, I wanted to ask if you wanted go with me to the music festival day after tomorrow? On a date, I mean.”

“Sure, I’d love to,” Jiwoong agrees easily. “Only if you sleep well, though.”

“I promise I’ll sleep,” Matthew laughs. “Wouldn’t want to miss the best date of the year because of my stupidity, huh?”

“You know, they’re doing a thing where you can dedicate songs to someone,” Jiwoong muses. Matthew immediately catches his meaning. “Would it be too much if I did so?”

“I—no, of course not,” Matthew curses himself for the stumble in his words, but Jiwoong just looks even more endeared. “Thank you for asking beforehand. I might have been overwhelmed if you sprung it on me out of nowhere. Being prepared makes it better.”

“If it’s too much, I won’t—”

“No, it’s okay, really!” he insists. “I’m flattered, honestly.”

Jiwoong’s concerned gaze softens. “Ah, Seok Matthew,” he sighs, “I like you so much. What do I do with myself?”

Matthew feels so warm. “I like you a lot, too,” he admits, refusing to let himself be shyer than he already is. “I like you so much.”

∞

“Hyung-ah!” Minho whines, rapping sharper on the door. Myungho finally opens the door and looks at him with an unimpressed expression. “Do you have Yoonsungie in there or something?”

“Yes, I do, but come in anyway,” he sighs. “He was trying a new makeup style on me.”

“I’m sure,” Minho drawls, but he sees that that is really what they were doing when he enters the small dorm room, Yoonsung sitting cross-legged on the bed with an array of makeup items spread out next to him. “Hey there, Yoonsungie.”

“Hi, hyung,” Yoonsung says, tugging Myungho back to sit and raising the brush to the older boy’s face. “What were you being so whiny about?”

“I confessed to Jaeyun!” Minho all but shrieks, sinking into the desk chair. He pulls up his knees to his chest. “I actually confessed to Jaeyun!”

“I should’ve known,” Myungho snorts. “He was in here an hour ago to scream about it.”

“Ugh, I like him so much, guys,” he wails, burying his face in his knees. “What should I do? It feels a little insane to ask him to go to the festival now! Isn’t that like a date?”

“Was that not your original intention?” Yoonsung asks.

“Yeah, but!” Minho makes a strangled noise. “I am feeling lots of big feelings right now. I’m also freaking out a little because what if Jaeyun thinks it’s stupid to go to the festival together when he’s already going anyway?”

“No, he won’t,” Myungho disagrees. “He’d be happy that you’re the excuse he can find to go fool around, you know that. He was calmer about his freaking out, but there was freaking out involved when he told me about the confession.”

Minho chews on his lip. “How would I even tell him?” he asks. “I mean, you two are the couple here. Give me something to work with.”

“Just ask him to go with you, Minho,” Myungho cracks open the eye Yoonsung isn’t working on. “It sounds complicated, but it isn’t. It’s honestly much simpler than you’re making it out to be. Didn’t that article tell you to remember that Jaeyun is human and he’s nervous, too?”

Myungho has a point there. “I also don’t want to fuck this up,” he confesses. “I’ve never properly dated anyone before. Well, not anyone I care about this much. What if I screw it up?”

“Then Jaeyun-hyung wouldn’t judge you for it,” Yoonsung says. “He’s just as nervous as you, if not more. He’ll get it. And to be fair, he’s the one cleaning up after your screwups, isn’t he?”

“To be fair—”

“Yes, you clean up after his messes too,” Yoonsung continues as if Minho hadn’t said anything. “You two depend on each other. You are best friends before anything else—you get each other on a deeper level than two people just dating around. You understand each other well enough.”

“That’s why you shouldn’t be afraid,” Myungho supplies. “As long as you put in the effort, Jaeyun will be more than happy to accept what you give him.”

“Trust the happy couple to give me that kind of advice,” Minho sighs. “Thank you, though. Should I go find Jaeyun and ask him now?”

“Why not?”

“Okay. Okay.” He sucks in a deep breath. “I’m going now.”

He sits there for another half-minute, tapping an anxious beat against his thighs. Myungho looks over at him with barely-concealed amusement.

“Now was a minute ago, Minho,” he snorts, “so get out of here before I kick you out.”

“I’m going!” he stands up and rubs his sweaty palms on his jeans. “I’m going.”

This time he really does go, closing the door a little too hard behind him as he goes. Myungho and Yoonsung explode into laughter as he starts down the hallway, but he’s far too nervous to pay much attention to that.

He reaches the staircase at the end of the hall and descends to the floor below, where Jaeyun’s dorm room is, across the hall from his own. He knocks on the door a little too softly at first, and then a little bit too hard. When Jaeyun opens the door, he looks unimpressed. His hair is slightly damp—a sign he’d just showered.

“Were you trying to make me think something happened?” he asks.

“What if something did happen?” Minho throws back.

“You wouldn’t be talking to me without freaking out if so,” Jaeyun points out. He steps aside to let a defeated Minho in. “What did you need, though?”

“I didn’t need anything,” he hedges. “I just wanted to ask you something.”

“Hm?” Jaeyun closes the door, looking at him expectantly. “Is this like when you said you wanted to watch the drama but you actually—”

“Sort of?” Minho tries for a nervous grin. Jaeyun tilts his head, his curiosity sufficiently aroused. “I. Um. Okay, don’t call me stupid for this, please?”

“Sure…?”

“I want to go to the festival with you,” he rushes out.

Jaeyun blinks once, twice. “We’re…already going?”

“No, I mean,” Minho twines his fingers together, pressing them hard enough that the pain makes him wince. “Like. Just the two of us ha—spending time together.” Don’t say hanging out if you want him to be your boyfriend, idiot, he scolds himself. “At the festival. Without anyone else.”

“Oh.” Jaeyun’s lips part in a small circle. “You mean like on a date?”

“Yes, a date,” Minho nods eagerly, glad that the worst part of it is over. “Because I know you’re going to be super focused and stressed and it would be nice to unwind, and enjoy the—”

“Minho, I know. I know,” he repeats. “Don’t look so freaked out, alright? I’ll go with you. I’ll be behind the stage most of the time coordinating the people performing, but I can convince someone to take over for a few hours. I’ll do it.”

“Okay,” Minho exhales. “Okay. Good. Great.”

“Want to tackle that essay together?” Jaeyun offers. “A study date, if you will.”

“Sure. I’ll just go get my stuff,” Minho steps around him, and opens the door to hurry across the hall. As he unlocks his own door, his heart is racing, bouncing off his ribcage, and he’s giggling a little hysterically as he rummages through the mess that he calls a desk.

He really just managed to secure a fucking date with Jaeyun twice. Now he just needs to figure out how to ask him to be his boyfriend.

∞

4. Go on a couple of dates before you ask them to be your partner. Asking them to be your boyfriend or girlfriend right off the bat may be a little intimidating for them, or make them too nervous to say yes. Enjoy your time together, and if things are great after 2-3 dates, then ask them for something a little more serious.

Say something like, “I’ve really liked hanging out, and I want to be more than friends. Do you want to be my partner?” or “can I ask you out on the next date as my boyfriend [or girlfriend]?”

The field is ablaze with light.

Besides the large lights propped up around the stage, pulsating with color, the trees twinkle with fairy lights and lightbulbs meant to make the space brighter. Matthew and Minho had both been too busy with lectures and assignments to go during the day, so they had asked their dates to go at night. It’s prettier that way, too.

The two of them had arrived together with Jaeyun and their friends, along with Hanbin, Hao, and Taerae, plus his boyfriend, Park Hanbin, and the man who had suggested the WikiHow idea himself, Lee Jeonghyeon, arm around his boyfriend, Chen Jianyu’s, waist.

Hanbin and Hao had immediately disappeared, as did Taerae and Park Hanbin. Jeonghyeon and Jianyu linger for a bit, but then they’re gone, too, Jianyu dragging Jeonghyeon along, pointing at one of the food stalls.

Myungho had almost immediately whispered something in Minho’s ear before tugging Yoonsung away, wishing Matthew good luck with his boyfriend. They’re gone before Matthew can shout a protest, and he sighs. Even Jaeyun is gone now, attending to his duties as part of the student volunteers helping the organizers. Not without telling Minho to find him later for their date.

“You’re so in love,” Matthew sighs when Jaeyun finally breaks away from them. Minho shoves him in the shoulder, but he makes no refusal, either. Matthew envies that. Who knows, maybe one day he’ll have that with Jiwoong.

Speaking of which…

지웅이형

| hyuuuuuung
| I’m here with my friend
| where are you

right behind you ;) |

Matthew whirls. “Hyung!” he beams, seeing the older man standing a few feet away. He’s so tall—now that he’s surrounded by so many people, it seems clearer.

Minho whistles softly. “Damn, he’s hot. How the hell did you capture his heart?”

“Shut up,” Matthew hisses back, smiling widely when Jiwoong approaches. “What took you so long?” he whines, teasing.

“Just had to put in the song request,” Jiwoong winks. He looks at Minho and nods politely. “Hello. I’m Kim Jiwoong.”

“Yang Minho,” he loops an arm through Matthew’s. “I’m a good friend of his. I take it you’re his date for the night?”

“And hopefully more,” Jiwoong says, making Matthew sputter, tearing his arm out of Minho’s grasp to hit him on the arm.

“Hyung! Seriously?!”

“Let’s go get something to eat—Yunjin’s about to take the stage in a minute,” Jiwoong takes his hand, laughing. “Her girlfriend’s waiting for us at the front of the crowd.”

“Bye, Minho,” Matthew says. “Go find someone to hang out with—but a word of advice, do not go to Hanbin-hyung. He and Hao-hyung are in their own little bubble.”

“Sure,” Minho agrees, and then Matthew’s being whisked away into the crowd by Jiwoong.

The two of them stop by a stall selling bungeoppang, where a tall boy is poking a shorter one and begging for another. Matthew watches in amusement as the shorter one finally caves and buys another, much to the delight of his companion.

“Thank you, hyung!” he crows in delight, a slight accent to his words that are slightly slurred as he bites happily into it. “I love you so much.”

“You only use honorifics when you get your way,” the other replies as they move away, “don’t think I’m flattered at all.”

“Kids are so cute,” Jiwoong remarks as he steps up to the stall. Matthew nods in agreement, as Jiwoong orders four pieces of the buns. They watch curiously as the stall owner, an aged woman old enough to be Matthew’s grandmother, works with the batter and mold deftly before grabbing the premade buns to give to them.

“Have fun,” she says warmly when she hands them over to Jiwoong, accepting his payment in return. “The festival always brings such happiness and joy to me.”

“Thank you,” Matthew beams.

The two of them head through the crowd, weaving through the people to get to the front, where a girl with round eyes and short hair waves enthusiastically at Jiwoong. “Hello, oppa,” she says. “Yunjin’s just about to go on!”

“Just in time, then,” Jiwoong hands her one of the fish buns. She accepts it with delight. “Matthew, meet Kim Chaewon, Yunjin’s girlfriend.”

“Hello,” Matthew says politely. The girl is shorter than him, but she appraises him with such a fire in her eyes despite her friendly demeanor that he feels a little apprehensive. “I’m Seok Matthew. It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you as well,” Chaewon says cheerfully. “You’re Jiwoong-oppa’s date, right? The one he can’t stop talking about? How old are you?”

“Chaewon!” Jiwoong protests. She only winks.

“Ah, I was born in 2002,” Matthew says.

“Call me noona, then,” she says, taking another bite of the fish bun. Matthew remembers that he hasn’t eaten his yet and bites into it. “Oh, look, there’s Yunjin!”

Huh Yunjin looks beautiful as she steps out onto the stage with an acoustic guitar around her shoulder and approaches the singular microphone stand in the center towards the front. She wears a mouthpiece and she adjusts the microphone to be at level with her guitar

The large speakers set up on both sides amplify the music as she starts strumming and sings softly. Her eyes fall on Chaewon more than once as she sings about the kind of girl she wishes to be, the kind of girl who everyone loves. But there is a thread of iron to it, the way she doesn’t put herself down as she sings. And when she sings the line I love you twice, she looks right at Chaewon.

The line itself means something different, but Chaewon glows all the same.

Matthew is hit with the thought that when Jiwoong’s request comes up, it’s going to be over for him.

∞

Minho wanders for a good ten minutes before he runs into the kids from before, Kyungmin and Haemin. They’re standing by a stall selling cotton candy, looking sort of entranced at the way the stall owner creates the fluffy clouds of sugar.

“Hello,” he comes up to them. “Remember me?”

“Oh, Minho-ssi!” Haemin exclaims. “Jaeyun-hyung’s boyfriend, right?”

“He’s not my boyfriend,” Minho protests. “Yet.”

Kyungmin laughs. “Confident,” he says. “Where is Jaeyun-hyung?”

“Doing his volunteer things. He said to come find him in an hour or two. Wanna hang out until then? I feel kind of stupid wandering around alone.”

“Sure,” Haemin agrees, handing him the first cotton candy stick. Minho blinks. “Take it, we have enough for all three of us,” the younger boy insists.

“Okay, then,” Minho agrees, taking it and tearing off a piece. The sugar melts on his tongue.

∞

Jiwoong’s song doesn’t come for another two hours.

Until then, Matthew is perfectly content with watching the performers come and go onstage. Yunjin steps down to let a tall, blonde girl step up and play two piano pieces, only to go right back up and this time sing a much more aggressive song, a backing track playing this time, played on a system by someone behind the stage.

“Cause if I had a choice, I’d put my opinions first,” she sings, walking around the stage with all the confidence of a born performer. Matthew says as much to Chaewon.

“She used to be an idol trainee,” Chaewon reveals.

“Used to be?”

“A lot of idol trainees just drop out because they can’t handle the stress,” she says, watching her girlfriend command the crowd with the power of her voice, her emotions. “A lot just aren’t cut out for it. Yunjin lasted a year before she broke—but not because she couldn’t do it. Both her parents got really sick and she had to take care of them. She was only sixteen then. It ended with her parents recovering, eventually, but she was nineteen by then and drowning in debt. She decided to go into university because there was nothing else to do.”

“Oh,” Matthew looks up at her. Such a strong-willed, cheerful girl, and she’d suffered so much. “She wrote that song, didn’t she?”

“Yep,” is all Chaewon says.

“Idol doesn’t mean your doll to fuck with,” the open cursing scandalizes a few older parents, but most of everyone is vibing, enjoying the song. Matthew finds that he’s having fun, too. He waves energetically at her and under the bright lights, her cheeks are flushed, her eyes sparkle, and she looks like she’s having more fun than she’s ever had.

“She should try again,” Matthew finds himself saying.

Chaewon laughs. “When she’s already more than twenty years old? It’s not likely, Matthew. She would never agree anyway.” She pauses. “But she’d appreciate your faith in her.”

Yunjin finishes off her song and bows, rushing off the stage full of giggles. She runs off the stage and right into Chaewon’s arms. “Did you see me, unnie? I was actually having fun!”

“I told you so,” Chaewon says, grinning. “I told you it would be worth it.”

Matthew looks away from their moment to the stage, where people are carrying a whole set of drums up the steps. “Jiwoon-hyung, look,” he tugs on the older man’s arm. “Is a band performing?”

“I think so, yes,”  Jiwoong watches as the drums are assembled and a group of about seven hurries onstage. A few appear to be around Matthew’s age, but a lot look younger.

“Wait, is that Kim Sunoo?” Matthew asks, squinting at the sight of Yoonsung’s roommate. “Huh. That’s something I didn’t know.”

“You know him?” Jiwoong asks.

“Hm, he’s a friend’s roommate,” Matthew says, watching the boys laugh as they push each other around and tune their respective instruments. He recognizes two of them as the kids at the bungeoppang stand earlier, talking to Kim Sunoo. The tall one carries a guitar befitting his height and build. The shorter one taps one of the mics the staff hand him and winces at the feedback noise.

Sunoo laughs unabashedly at him while their taller friend pats his shoulder. He scowls at them both.

“Hello, everyone,” he says into the mic. “Our first song is a request from, uh—” he squints at a piece of paper in his hand. “From a Kim Jiwoong. Jiwoong-ssi, I hope you’ll enjoy it, as well as the person he’s dedicating this to.”

Matthew looks at Jiwoong. “A band,” he repeats. “A band.”

Jiwoong winces. “Look, in my defense, they had a collection of lyric sheets and I just picked the one I wanted to dedicate to you,” he says.

Matthew starts laughing. “You’re so ridiculous, hyung,” he says fondly. “I’m going to love this.”

One of them starts tapping a beat on the drums, and the same boy says with a sparkle in his eye, “this is called Shout Out. Please enjoy!”

“We go and shout!” a doe-eyed boy Matthew is fairly sure he’s seen around the university opens the song. Jiwoong’s hands tighten in his. He feels the apprehension, the nervousness in the grip, and squeezes back, watching in awe as the band start performing a song in perfect synchrony, like it’s a song they have sung many times and loved as many times.

Living for a day like I’m swept away every day
I got one small doubt
I’m getting sick of all kinds of people’s words
Who on earth defines myself?

“This is also personal to you,” Matthew shouts in Jiwoong’s ear to be heard over the music. “Isn’t it?”

“Is it that obvious?” Jiwoong asks, half-joking. “I thought you would like it if I was honest. If I found a way to convey everything that I wanted to say.”

The fake paradigm that locked me up
Beyond the border line drawn by someone
I shout out, and this is my shout out
I’m all for myself

Matthew laughs, holding tight to Jiwoong as the song progresses, realizing that Jiwoong is a hopeless, hopeless romantic. He decides that he absolutely adores that about the man; another reason on the list of why he is so down bad for this idiot. His Jiwoong-hyung.

Oh, Hao and Taerae are going to make so much fun of him when they hear this—not as much as Minho and Jaeyun, probably. And Matthew welcomes it.

On your own way, whatever you want
This is our universe
Whoever is aware of it
Just this free moment, you and me

Kim Sunoo can sing, Matthew notes, as can the kid with the guitar. He’ll have to ask Sunoo about that later, if he can.

He looks up to see Jiwoong is dancing slightly to the beat, while Chaewon and Yunjin are dancing unabashedly, as one with the music. Craning his head further to see if he can see anyone else, he sees Minho with a pair of kids a distance off, singing dramatically into one of their hands. The other one looks embarrassed to be there, but no less caught in the sway of the music.

“Yang Minho!” he hollers as the music rolls into the chorus, a powerful sound infused with love. Any kind of love, Matthew decides, interpreting the lyrics to his suiting. He wonders if Jiwoong had seen it that way, too. If he’d seen the song as a way to show off his heart.

Minho, somehow, hears the yell, and waves frenetically. He takes both of the kids’ hands—both are taller than him—and drags them over to where Matthew and Jiwoong are.

“Having fun?” he asks right in Matthew’s ear. “This is some song he’s chosen for you!”

“I know!” Matthew tries and fails to suppress his stupid grin. “Where’s Jaeyun?”

“I’ll find him after this song!”

I would have given up if I were alone
I’m trapped in the wall that locked me up
Your voice is calling me
You’re blowing up my heart uh, bang-bang!

“He’s in our year,” Minho points to the one who had sang the last line. “Park Jongseong. The dance club captain absolutely adores him.”

“Isn’t that guy vaguely familiar?” he points to the other boy standing to Jongseong’s left, tall and classically handsome. “I feel like I’ve seen him somewhere before.”

“I think he’s in our year, too!”

We witnessed each other
Yeah, you and I-I
Each other’s listeners, I believe you
Our perfect harmony is truly beautiful

Matthew raises an eyebrow at Jiwoong. “Why do I think that specific lyric is what really made you decide this is the song?”

Jiwoong’s ears redden. “I…have no defense.”

Matthew cackles. “Oh, hyung! You’re so cheesy!”

“You love it!”

The pre-chorus starts again and Matthew wonders if he’s seeing things in the way some of them look at each other as they sing. He wonders which of them wrote the song; it really is a beautiful thing. Whoever composed it, too. Matthew quickly decides that this is now one of his favorite songs.

“Hey,” Minho shouts in his ear, “do you think Jaeyun would appreciate it if I sang him some lines of this song?”

As Minho’s literal major involves him singing, Matthew thinks he could pull it off very easily. He says as much, and then, “he would hit you for being so cheesy, though.”

“True,” Minho looks thoughtful. “Maybe I should write him a poem or something.”

“You haven’t even asked him to be your boyfriend yet, Minho!”

“We’ll get there,” Minho grins. “Hopefully tonight.”

Matthew envies his determination to make it happen so soon. He himself is content with letting things play out without his intervention tonight. He can’t really bring himself to take anything further with Jiwoong right now—WikiHow article or not.

The song slows, becomes softer.

With my real voice
I’ll tell you my true feelings

His eyes snap to Jiwoong. Oh.

The world is beautiful when we’re together
Spread out, spread out far away
Now shout, shout, shout out loud
Til the end of time, the story of you and I

He looks helplessly at Minho, who raises an eyebrow in Jiwoong’s direction. One thing that they have all learned tonight is that Jiwoong does things intentionally and as Matthew is slowly beginning to realize, he is such a hopeless romantic that he will do a lot to get his crush’s attention.

The doe-eyed singer’s voice is pitched higher, soft and almost filled with…longing.

We go and shout, shout, shout
When we’re together
Stay, stay, stay—

And then his voice becomes filled with resolve.

—you make it better!

And he looks at the dance captain’s favorite, Park Jongseong, who looks startled, like a deer caught in headlights, but he recovers quickly.

My life without you is a misery
My heart is racing like it’s gonna explode
Shout, shout, shout, like you and me
The world shakes, louder
Shout out my heart for you
My burning heart, shout out!

Jiwoong is looking at him like he hung the stars in the sky. Like he is all that Jiwoong sees. Matthew feels an inexplicable surge of warmth and if he had any less of self-restraint, he’d hurl himself into Jiwoong’s arms and kiss him right there, with no regard for anyone around them.

As it is, Minho snickers at the look in his eyes.

“Shout out to the world together, we shout out louder,” Sunoo sings into the mic, ending off the song with a bright grin that could capture millions of hearts at the crowd.

“Oh my god,” Matthew presses his hands to his face. “When you said dedicate a song to me, I didn’t think it would be—that!”

“Are you upset?” Jiwoong asks anxiously.

“On the contrary!” Matthew looks up, deciding that fuck the WikiHow article, he is not going to wait for a few more dates—not when Jiwoong has put him on the spot like this, goddamn it. “You wear your heart on your sleeve almost as openly as Hanbin-hyung, I swear!”

Jiwoong blinks. “Uh…I take that you’re happy?”

“More than happy!” he declares. “Are you going to ask me to be your boyfriend or not?”

Minho starts coughing. “Jesus Christ, Matthew!” he wheezes. “I’ll just—leave now. C’mon, guys, let’s go find Jaeyun.”

Jiwoong takes Matthew’s hands. “Seok Matthew,” he says very seriously. “Will you be my boyfriend?”

In response, Matthew steps forward and plants a kiss on his lips. He lingers for only a few seconds, not daring to take it further in public, but it’s enough of an answer for Jiwoong.

He glows like the moon in the sky with the force of his happiness.

∞

Minho manages to have quite a bit of fun with Kyungmin and Haemin, going from stall to stall and eating to their heart’s content—or as much as the budget they’ve allowed themselves for the night will do. It’s still more than enough. He only misses Jaeyun, keeping bright knowing that he’ll see Jaeyun soon enough.

The highlight of the night before he goes to find Jaeyun is definitely when Kyungmin makes to start shoving food into Haemin’s mouth for no apparent reason. Haemin squeaks in protest when a large piece of bungeoppang is shoved into his mouth, but he gives Kyungmin a look and swallows it down anyway, saying that it tastes good.

They walk around, listening to the music, while Haemin absently eats whatever Kyungmin gives him.

When they look up at the stage after getting more cotton candy for Haemin—who had accidentally dropped his earlier—they see a band setting up their drums and tuning their instruments onstage. Kyungmin gasps, grabbing Haemin by the arm, who narrowly avoids dropping his candy again.

“That’s my friend’s band!” he says excitedly to Minho. “Come on, let’s go closer to watch!”

Minho follows them as they run along. Somehow, they manage to weave through the crowd and make it almost near the front, but they’re all tall enough that they can see the stage well enough. The song is a request from a Kim Jiwoong. Minho stifles a giggle, imagining how Matthew must look when the song starts and the lyrics are heard.

“They sound good,” Minho notes. “Who’s your friend, Kyungmin?”

Kyungmin points to a boy with dark hair and catlike eyes, dimples deep on his cheeks as he smiles up at his taller bandmate. He sings beautifully, the line the fake paradigm that locked me up sounding much sweeter than the line connotates from his lips.

“That’s Jungwon,” he says. “We’re in the same class at school. He loves being in that band—it’s his life and soul, basically.”

“Who’s the kid he’s smiling at?” Minho asks, thinking that the smile looks weirdly similar to something he can’t quite place.

“Oh, that’s Riki. He’s from Japan and they have a weird on-and-off thing going on,” it’s Haemin who answers the question.

“If you can even call it that, for something that’s never properly started,” Kyungmin snorts. Then he stops. “That was mean of me. What I meant is that Riki has a difficult time properly forming relationships and neither of them really handle it the best way.”

“Ouch,” Minho says sympathetically. “They’re so young for that.”

Haemin shrugs. “Teenage years are always the messiest, if you ask me.”

Minho frowns. “Hey, is that Kim Sunoo?” he points to the fox-eyed boy.

“You know Sunoo-hyung?” Kyungmin asks.

“He’s my friend’s roommate,” Minho says. “Wow. Small world, isn’t it?”

The song progresses and picks up to an explosive beat of voices and drums and guitars and energy. Minho finds himself dancing to the beat, as do the other two, and they even sing along by the time the chorus hits, stumbling along to the lyrics a second behind.

Kyungmin pretends to hold a microphone to Minho’s mouth and he sings dramatically, while Haemin just watches, both amused and horrified at their lack of care for how they look. Truthfully, it’s not that Minho doesn’t care—it’s more that he cares but he’s a little bit, a little bit, drunk on the excitement of knowing what comes next. After this song, he’s going to go find Jaeyun and—

“Yang Minho!” a yell cutting through the music captures his attention.

Matthew is waving at him, stuck to Kim Jiwoong’s side. They both look ecstatic and a little bit more lovesick than before. With them are two girls lost in their own world, who only give the trio a nod before their attention diverts back to the band and each other.

Minho witnesses how much Matthew likes Jiwoong in the two-ish minutes he stays with them as the song plays. His first instinct is to tease Matthew, but he suppresses that and manages to limit himself to a laugh instead.

And then Matthew actually spits the question out.

Minho decides he might not want to see this and slips away with the two high-schoolers in tow. They push through the crowd and circle behind the stage, where a tent is set up—just a huge sheet of canvas propped up with metal poles—and look around for Jaeyun. Fortunately for them, he’s outside, talking to a girl with a smile on his face.

“See you later, hyung,” Kyungmin says and walks off with Haemin. Minho is sad to see them go, but this means he has time with Jaeyun now.

“Hey.” Minho comes up to him, slipping an arm around his waist. Part of his mind screams at him for his nonchalance, but the rest of it screams in joy that Jaeyun leans into the touch. “Ready to go?”

“Oh, there you are,” Jaeyun grins. “Sure, I’m ready.” He looks at the girl, a good foot shorter than them. “You’re sure that you’ve got this?”

She rolls her eyes. “Oh, shove off,” she says. “Go enjoy your date. I’m not doing that much work!”

“Okay, okay,” Jaeyun leads him away, and Minho struggles to control his giggles. “What?”

“She’s fiery,” is all Minho says.

“She tends to be,” Jaeyun shrugs. “Did you eat yet?”

“Ugh, did I,” he groans. “I don’t think I can manage anything else. Kyungmin and Haemin were very enthusiastic. I had fun, though.”

“That’s good,” Jaeyun pokes at his hair. “You’re all sweaty. What have you been doing?”

“Dancing along to the songs, particularly the band,” he gestures to the stage, where Park Jongseong is singing with his very soul—oh no, I don’t know what to do, my tangled dream—and then he remembers. “Hey, speaking of which, how come I never knew Kim Sunoo’s in a band?”

“Oh, you didn’t know?” Jaeyun looks surprised. “Yes, he is, I thought everyone knew.”

“I didn’t,” Minho says, gazing up at them. “It must be incredible to be up there and perform, huh?”

“You know you could just go up there and sing,” Jaeyun nudges him. “You have the skill for it. And we do have an open spot that one of us will fill if we don’t get anyone to step up?”

“Yah, Moon Jaeyun,” Minho pouts, “am I just an opportunity to you?”

“Of course not,” he nudges Minho harder. “Don’t say that. I mean it genuinely.”

“I know you do, I just,” he bites his lip. “I don’t think I’m ready for it yet.”

Jaeyun reaches out to release his lip from his teeth. Fire sparks in Minho’s blood at the touch—Jaeyun has never done that kind of thing before. He blinks and stares at Jaeyun with wide eyes, lip burning where Jaeyun’s finger had touched it. Still touches it. Thumb resting on his lip and the rest of his hand tucked beneath his chin.

Jaeyun stares back for a second before he realizes what he’s doing. He snatches his hand back, lips parting to say something but no words come out. Minho clears his throat and looks away, trying to calm the drumming of his heart, the heat singing through him.

“You’re good enough,” Jaeyun says after almost a minute. “Besides, the people aren’t here for professionality, are they? And I think you’re good enough. I couldn’t do a falsetto like you can.”

“Bullshit,” Minho finally looks back at him. Under the fairy lights of the trees ringing the field, he looks like the boy of everyone’s dreams—so pretty and beautiful. Minho wonders when he had even fallen for Jaeyun and finds that he can’t quite remember; he only remembers that first day they met, the way they clicked so easily, and then days after he had started to notice his friend in a different light. “You could, I know that much.”

“Okay,” he concedes, “but I still say you’re better.”

“We take the same classes, Jaeyun, I’m not.”

“Agree to disagree?”

“I don’t even know what that means, but sure,” he shakes Jaeyun’s outstretched hand. “Have you eaten yet, though?”

“Yeah, someone kept sneaking off to get food,” Jaeyun laughs, and just like that, the tension dissipates. “Let’s go watch the stage. There’s only like two or three more acts left.”

This time, instead of trying to approach the front, they stick to the side of a stage, close to the stairs where the performers go up and down. There are several people seated on the grass at this point, so Minho looks at Jaeyun. He shrugs.

They sit down shoulder to shoulder, hands entwined atop Minho’s knee. The girl and boy singing a sweet love song on the stage have the crowd in a moment of quietness, slowly swaying to the music; Minho feels a little bold, so he drops his head onto Jaeyun’s shoulder. It’s not anything he hasn’t done before, but it feels different. Jaeyun freezes for only a second, and then relaxes against him.

Another song or two passes by like that. At one point, Jaeyun’s hand found its way into Minho’s hair and as all the songs are relatively slow, he thinks he could almost fall asleep right here.

There’s a lull in the performances and then someone yells Jaeyun’s name, followed by rapid footsteps coming towards them. Minho only has the chance to sit up properly before a pink-haired, tall boy is in front of them.

“What happened?” Jaeyun asks.

“Oh, hi, sunbae,” Minho says, recognizing the dance captain. He hadn’t realized the older is part of the volunteers, too.

“Yeonjun-hyung,” he corrects, “or noona, whatever. Stop with the formalities!” he clears his throat. “Anyway. Just informing you that we indeed could not find anyone else to fill in the last slot, so I’m taking matters into my own hands.”

“Oh,” Jaeyun blinks. “Just you? By yourself?”

“Nah, I roped a bunch of the others into doing it with me, since Beomgyu and I already have a good song between us that we’re all familiar with,” he shakes his head. “I also came here to tell you to not come back. Just because five of us are missing doesn’t mean you need to go back, okay?”

Jaeyun laughs. “Okay, then,” he says, amused, and a little embarrassed. Minho thinks he’s adorable. “I’ll sit right here. You go and have fun up there.”

Then Yeonjun is off and Minho is settling back against Jaeyun. His eyes drift closed listening to the lo-fi music the staff have put on while Yeonjun and his group prepare themselves. Jaeyun hums along with it, his hand back in Minho’s hair.

He would have stayed like that forever if Yeonjun didn’t start speaking into the mic. “Alright, everyone!” he says. “This is the last and final song of the night! I hope you enjoy what we have to show, considering we’re really just a fill-in.”

With him are four others, most of who look out into the crowd with wondrous expressions, taking in the sheer amount of people spread out before them. Minho waves to his friend Taehyun, who takes a few classes with him. Jaeyun says they’re on the dance club.

“Our last song of the night is a bit of a work of labor,” Yeonjun says. Minho has to laugh when he sees the ever-energetic Choi Yeonjun is actually a little bit shy in front of a crowd, but he seems to suck in the energy the crowd feeds him—a good portion of the crowd is university students and there are few people who don’t know him. They hoot and cheer even if to mess with him. “It’s called Eyes. Our Beomgyu here worked tirelessly to compose it,” he gives Beomgyu a glance. “Please enjoy it!”

The music starts up. Yeonjun is the first one to start singing, followed by Beomgyu. Minho is surprised; he didn’t know either of them had any kind of training at all. He should ask them about it.

The light winds wrap around me
The ground and sea protect me but
(Here is anywhere)

Jaeyun pulls him to his feet and they weave through the crowd to make it closer to the stage, where they manage to spot Matthew and Jiwoong, but they’re too far away to hear their calls. They just pay attention to the song instead. Taehyun sings with all the skill Minho knows he has.

Sometimes, the darkness behind the light will fill the space
Life may be tough, but we can do it, we are strong
Hold my hand as hard as you can

As if in response to that, Jaeyun grabs ahold of Minho’s hand. He leans forward to whisper right in Jaeyun’s ear, “romantic, aren’t you?” his lips brushing the skin. Jaeyun shivers and pushes him away with a laugh, the laugh that Minho is so fond of.

We are together
When we fought back in the dark shadows (to be closed)
Once again, the peaceful sun gradually rises and lights up

A bit of a work of labor, Yeonjun had called it. The lyrics seem to mean something to them all. Minho wonders what hardships the ever-cheerful, friendly, Choi Yeonjun could have struggled with. Then he looks at Jaeyun and he realizes that no one is without struggle; Jaeyun had taught him as much.

The song rises, picking up, and Yeonjun’s dancer body is coiled with energy waiting to burst out. When the chorus hits, he’s jumping and moving around the stage, not dancing, exactly, but his movements seem fitting to the song.

A dancer at his core, Jaeyun starts to copy Yeonjun’s moves, bursting out into laughter when the older notices and pulls an affronted expression. Minho giggles.

He’s sufficiently startled when Yeonjun raises the mic back to his mouth and says, “I might just ask you two to come up here with us!”

Jaeyun immediately stops, but neither of them stop laughing, even when people look at them. Yeonjun opens his mouth again, but instead of to speak, it’s to rap. Damn. Is there nothing he can’t do?

Do you still remember the first time we met?
Radiating energy I felt beyond sight
We are one (you know I know)
We’re connected (you know I know)

He grabs Beomgyu’s hands and starts running around the stage with him. Beomgyu yells something affronted but he’s laughing, expression lit up like a thousand suns. Yeonjun keeps to the beat without missing a single word.

An increasing heartbeat
Be brave, an unloosing friendship
Let’s work together to win
Whatever the adventure (you know I know)
We’ll be together

“They only recently got together, didn’t they?” Minho asks, watching how happy the two of them look, while their friends look on with exasperated yet amused expressions. It reminds Minho of the way Myungho and Yoonsung tend to watch Minho and Jaeyun interact.

He wonders why he missed all the signs that Jaeyun has always liked him back. That they’ve always been completing each other before they even realize what they’re doing. Everyone else saw it, but the power of denial is something else, it seems.

All at once, as if a strong typhoon (oh)
Covers the path in front of me (yeah)
I would still shout out
When your voice reaches me wherever (to you)

“Get it, Kang Taehyun!” Minho screeches at the top of his voice, overcome with a rush of feeling. He couldn’t tell you all of those feelings but he feels many things and he feels the need to act on it whichever way he can. Taehyun, of course, doesn’t hear over the music, but the intent is still there.

Minho remembers that he still has his phone and tugs it out to take a recording of whatever is left over of the performance. Jaeyun also does the same, except he’s taking pictures of the two of them. Minho’s laughter is probably the loudest sound on the video, given the phone’s proximity to him, but he can’t find it in himself to care.

He makes weird faces at the camera while Jaeyun begs him for a proper picture, but Minho, of course, doesn’t listen. All of their selfies end up turning out weird and Minho honestly doesn’t mind. It marks a moment of joyousness and happiness, of a night when they are able to unwind and have fun freely.

In one picture, he throws up the middle finger for no reason, making Jaeyun laugh so hard that his finger slips and captures a snap of the two of them in mid-laughter. It’s blurry and badly angled, but Minho stops Jaeyun from deleting it.

Ooh, a connection between you and I

Their faces are so close. Have they been so close this entire time?

Even if we face a bigger crisis, we are here together, wake up

Minho swallows. What would happen if he kissed Jaeyun, right here, right now? Would Jaeyun care? Would he be upset? Is he imagining the way Jaeyun stares back, swallows lightly?

Fill with light (world)
A dream I just woke up from (oh)
I can feel it all with a warm breath
Behind the darkness (ayy)
There’s another great hope (hope~)
A new start awaits
So, open your closed eyes

Yeonjun has already noticed them. When Minho’s eyes flick to the stage momentarily, he sees Yeonjun watching with wide eyes. Do it, he mouths, do it!

Can he? Does he have the courage?

Oh-oh-oh-ayy-oh
Open your closed eyes

Jaeyun does it for him. He closes the distance between them and kisses Minho so tentatively, so softly, as if he’s afraid he might be pushed away. Minho’s eyes flutter closed, hands involuntarily clenching into fists at his side. This is far from his first kiss.

But it’s the first kiss from someone he has cared so deeply about. His heart pounds so hard against his ribcage he’s afraid his ribs might crack. He’s afraid Jaeyun hears it, even as Jaeyun’s hands press against his chest. The kiss is nothing more than a press of lips with tentative moment, tame, really, but his head spins regardless.

When he opens his eyes as they part, it’s to see Jaeyun’s own wide and holding the stars in the sky as he looks back at Minho, slightly dazed and a little breathless. Onstage, Beomgyu’s singing has laughter in it, and Yeonjun says something into the mic that completely flies over his head.

“I didn’t expect that so soon,” he whispers.

“Should I be sorry?” Jaeyun asks.

“No! Never,” he grabs Jaeyun’s hands. “Never, okay?”

Oh-oh-oh-ayy-oh
Eyes containing all the light
There’s nothing to be afraid of
Open your closed eyes

The song ends like that, and the crowd roars, an explosion of noise that shocks the two of them out of their little bubble. Minho realizes that he’s been recording the grass for almost a minute now.

“Thank you!” Yeonjun yells, all shyness gone. God, he has so much energy.

“What does this make us?” Jaeyun whispers in his ear as they watch the five boys descend the stairs and disappear to the tent.

Minho swallows. Go on a couple of dates before you ask them to be your partner.

But that doesn’t really apply here anymore, does it?

So, he turns to Jaeyun and he says what he has wanted to say the very first time he opened his heart to Jaeyun. “Boyfriends, if you want that,” he breathes out. Jaeyun’s eyes light up.

“I do,” he nods.

They stare at each other for a few seconds, and again, dissolve into laughter. This time it’s a little hysterical and even has relief threaded into it, because this is over a year of pining finally brought to a conclusion and it didn’t get as messy as it could have.

It all worked out. Minho might have to say thank you to Lee Jeonghyeon.

∞

5. Respect a rejection, don’t take it too hard. Rejection happens sometimes

∞

양민호

| so
| I heard that you two shared a very romantic kiss right there

shut UP |
says the one I had to run from |

| barely anything happened, don’t be dramatic
| I told you the wikihow would be useful

you should introduce me to the guy |
lee jeonghyeon |
I didn’t get to talk to him at all last night |

| sure
| meet me after lectures