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I tried. I really tried and I hope you know that.
At first I didn't like it. I didn't like you. But then you warmed up to me, you said you wanted to help me. And then you wanted to enter my heart. At that time I didn't understand what you meant. I was the one always lending you things, I was the one who stayed to comfort you through your panic to make you see the real colours again. I was the one who was always ready to help. You were the one that was supposed to be helped. The one struggling. I was supposed to be your savior.
They told me we were good together, that I needed to keep you under control. They told me I was supposed to talk to you when you were too loud. They told me I was supposed to talk to you when you were too quiet. When you were too jittery. When you were too still.
I was supposed to always be there. I was supposed to be the strong one. Do you remember when they made art of us? I was always the taller and stronger one, while you were fragile and short.
They didn't quite get us right though. Maybe it's my fault. Maybe I should've tried harder to fit the role. Or maybe it was you who deviated the script. You were always so mad about how they depicted you. One time you threw a fit because you thought they saw you as a girl and wanted you to enter their cult.
It ended with the gym on fire.
…
I liked it. I liked the way they drew us together in a way. I liked that I would always be there to help you and see your smile at the end, because despite how frustrating it was when I couldn't logic with your emotions, I liked to see that smile light up the whole room. And every time they drew us I would be the strong one. Not you.
…
You know I'm not the best at seeing the details of the big picture. I always missed it. Even when it was spelled to my face. I decided to put a bandaid to cover my memories to ignore that truth.
I always gravitated towards you at the end of the day. I hugged you more than i did with anyone, i always took the chance to grab your hand. Every time we hung out now seemed like a blessing. Even when we fought I was the first one to make a move to resolve, it was because I couldn't be without you.
Life before was dull, simple, boring. And I thought it was a good thing. I loved my boring time, I loved when things were simple. I thrived on it.
Or at least I thought I did.
After you came. Everything started to change. Everything began to be chaotic, loud, new. I hated it, it was difficult and I despised it. I wanted to be done with everything and tell everyone to fuck off. But I couldn't. Because it was alive to be with you. Everything felt somewhat exciting. Even those emotions that I didn't recognize and that I didn't know how to deal with.
Everything felt so real.
So I couldn't let you get away, because you gave me a new piece of myself that I couldn't detach after that. You gave me your presence, you gave me your smiles, you gave me your forgiveness, you gave me knowledge, you gave me a weakness.
I was so happy every time I was around you and I didn't even notice because that quickly became the new normal. And when it was said directly to my face I declined because of my pride. That's why I'm the stupid one. I learned later it was fine that you made me happy. That i could exclaim it to the world! But you knew from the start, you would've simply answered with a yes. Because you were cool like that. Maybe you would've panicked that they wanted to use it against you. Hehe.
I didn't notice that happiness i felt until it got stripped away from me, leaving me in tears.
It was the first time i cried for someone did you know that?
And they thought I was the strong one? I'm a fucking mess without you and i miss you so much every day. I don't know if I can go on, I miss you.
You were always the one carrying everything. You carried the boxes when I couldn't even pick one up, you carried worries for the both of us, you displayed your emotions so I didn't have to, you were always there to pick me up when you noticed I was down. And god, you always noticed.
And now? Now i orbited away from my sun and I don't know what to do. Now I'm just existing aimlessly without a purpose.
I wasn't the one keeping you anchored.
I only kept you company and was graced enough that you liked it.
You were the one keeping me on this path.
But now you're gone. And I'm lost.
I miss you everyday Tweek.
-Craig.
Cemetery of Southpark. Third row on the right. Fourth gravestone from the front.
In memory of Tweek Tweak.
Date of birth: August 17th of XXXX
Date of death: August 1st of XXXX
He was a great friend and great partner.
We miss you.
Around the lapid there were several signs with goodbyes written.
I hope you can get rebirth as the greatest fenice so i won't have to lose you again next time -Craig
We all miss you, town hasn't been the same since you left like this, if there's a next life i hope to meet you there, if there isn't say hi to my mom for me in the meantime -Clyde
Hope we weren't too bad of friends for this life, don't replace us too bad in your next ok? May you rest in peace, -your friend Tolkien
I know this isn't the time for puns but I hope the ones I did stayed in your heart at least for a while. It's hard without you but I'm trying to make everyone smile, i know you didn't like when people were hurting -Jimmy
You stayed with me until the end, until your fire died and you couldn't couldn't even move anymore.
I'll keep you company until I won't remember who i am. I'll keep you company until the wind takes my ashes away by force. I'll keep you company until I won't be able to anymore.
I love you Tweek.
I just hoped I could've said it to you.