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Chapter Text

The first time it happened, Henry thought nothing of it. 

Of course in their one and a half year living together, things weren't always picture perfect. They knew that from the moment they settled in. They knew that them both having to work plus keeping their public image would sometimes affect their schedules and dates. 

So when Alex decided to study after his classes and come home an hour later, Henry thought nothing of it. How could he anyway? 

Alex came in their house, hyper energetic, considering the hour and kissed Henry, while David was bouncing around their legs. 

"I'm..." A kiss. "So..." Another kiss. "Sorry... I just lost track of-" 

"Love...it's fine." Henry nuzzled their noses together. "We can still watch that movie you know. You can go up to change clothes-" 

"It's kind of late, isn't it? I mean I have to get up early..."

Henry was a bit disappointed, if he was honest. Not mad, but he really wanted two hours of Alex, laying on him and commenting on everything or take turns nagging about their day. 

"But... Do you know what I think you and I would both enjoy right now?"

"What?" 

"A good blowjob." 

Henry rolled his eyes as he started laughing. "Why was I expecting anything else?" 

"Say it."

"Say what?"

"Say Alex, love of my life, that's a fucking great idea." 

"Dramatic much?" 

Alex gasped (in a quite dramatic way) turning his back on Henry and going to leave the kitchen, before Henry wrapped him in his hug from behind. 

"Alex, love of my life..." He smiled and kissed his shoulder. "That's a great idea." 

"That's a 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 great idea!"

"I'm not saying that." 

"Then so bad! No blowjob for you."

"That's a fucking great idea!" Henry yelled quickly. "You menace..."

"Great!" The brunette picked up his bag before walking out. "Get yourself hard cause I'm gonna--" Something was heard falling, and the blonde realized Alex must have tripped over something. 

Henry muffled his laugh in their kitchen. Sometimes, he was really concerned about their neighbors. Sometimes... 

"Alex, love, have you eaten?" 

"What?" 

"Have you eaten?" Henry yelled louder. 

A short silence. "I'm...not that hungry now. I'll eat in a while."

Henry made a mental note to ask again later. There were leftovers from yesterday's pizza, plus Henry would cook something for him if he wanted. 

But for now, his boyfriend had a fucking great idea. So Henry thought nothing. 

The next time it happened, Henry thought almost nothing of it.

Alex had promised he would be home by eight so they could have dinner on a new restaurant that Pez had insisted on going. June would be coming to visit with Nora and Alex had absolutely no idea. Henry even wondered how the paparazzi missed it. So after his class, their gang would be almost complete. At least if Alex had returned home at eight. 

"Jesus Alex..." Henry paced back and down, phone in hand. "It's almost nine and that's the third voicemail I'm leaving you. It would be nice y'know... Picking up. Informing me. We will miss the reservation." 

Pez was observing him from a distance, fully dressed and with some sparkly glasses in hand. He was really debating on whether to speak. 

"Did you two...fight?" 

"No...but I predict we will. The moment he reaches home..." 

"Oh shut up... The only reason two people that love each other as much as you two do, should fight is for the makeup sex that ensues afterwards."

"Pez... We've been on the shelter all morning. We've been working our asses off all week. And he promised-" 

Suddenly there was a click on the door and Cash walked in, supporting a mid-conscious Alex who barely had the strength to keep his feet on the ground. 

"Alex?" 

"Alexander?" 

The two men rushed next to him, Pez patting his cheek lightly and Henry rubbing their hands together. 

"Love, can you hear me?" Henry kissed his hand before turning to Cash. "What happened?" 

"He passed out on the way out of the library." 

"Passed out?"

"H?" Alex fluttered his eyes. "I'm sorry... I told Cash it wasn't a big deal..." 

"But then he passed out again. So I took him to the doctor's office." 

Henry nodded. "What did the doctor say?"

"It was probably due to--" Cash mouthed 𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘰𝘧 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘥. 

"Alright, alright... Cash I can take it from here, thank you." The prince took Alex from Cash. 

"Darling, I'm taking you to our room to rest, okay?" 

"H, we'll miss the--" 

"Uhh...it doesn't matter..." Pez didn't mention the girls were already there. "I'll get us another one."

"You two can go... I'll just sleep anyway."

"You're probably joking... Like I could convince Henry to leave you. Instead...you stay here and I...will go now." Pez picked up his feathery coat. "Night night." 

"Goodnight." Henry smiled as the door closed and picked Alex up bridal style. "Try to rest, okay?" He said with a soft voice. 

"Are you mad?" Alex almost whispered when they reached the bedroom. 

"More upset that you didn't take care of yourself." He tugged him in. "Any chances you could skip tomorrow?" 

"No way... Important stuff..."

"We've talked about this. Your health--"

"Henry--"

"Is more important." 

"God... I knew that we would have this conversation... Just because I work a little too much sometimes,doesn't mean--" 

"Why can't you just do as I say for once?" Henry said, defeated. 

"You knew that before you even met me. My fame proceeded me." 

"That you would be stubborn as hell? That I did..." 

"Asshole."

"Jerk." 

"Prick."

"Light of my eyes." 

Alex was probably taken aback by this but managed to smile. "love of my life." 

So Henry brought some food for him and Alex upstairs. After Alex devoured his whole plate, they ended up cuddling together, their upcoming fight already far away. 

The next time...well, Henry had no time to think. 

Alex was stressing about his classes all week and given the fact that Christmas were approaching, the mood inside the brownstone wasn't all holly jolly. Alex promised he would make it up on Thursday and apologized every time he wasn't home in time for lunch or movie nights. What was Thursday you might ask? 

It was the one year anniversary of the New York LGBTQ youth shelter and Henry was more than pleased. Pez had really outdone himself with the decorations and the party. Henry had worked his ass off but compared to the people Pez had invited, his help was like a drop of water in the ocean. 

So Henry decided to bring Alex. Some of the kids in the shelter were already obsessed with him (and Alex adored them as well, not that he would admit it) but it seemed like having Alex here would be the cherry on top of the cake. A cake with many actors, billionaires, singers, models, influencers and also royals. And Henry was proud. So fucking proud. 

"Haz!" Pez made his way to the blonde quickly, suit sparkling under the dim lights backstage. The prince was peeking through the curtains where a millionaire was making a speech in front of the crowd. "Haz, where is Alexander?"

Henry only showed him their messages. One that Alex had sent half an hour ago saying he was on his way and then millions of Henry's. 

"Don't tell me--"

"When is his turn to speak?" 

"His turn to speak was two people before!" 

"Fuck." Henry muttered under his breath. "We can tell Sharon to skip him again and then-"

"Is he... Fuck it...Is he even coming?" 

"He promised me..." Henry stopped. His promise meant nothing right now. Not when he had to explain to so many people why Alex--

"Please welcome next, Mr. Alex Claremont Diaz." Sharon's voice was heard before they even realized the previous speech was over. People were clapping, cameras were rolling, some others cheered... 

And Henry wished earth could swallow him whole. 

Pez had lost his grace the moment of the announcement. Now he was just standing by, wishing Alex would appear on a magic carpet or something. 

On the way Henry viewed it he had three options:

1: to let the crowd wait; insufficient and unnecessary. And until when? 

2: say that Alex won't make it. It will probably end in conspiracies and gossip. Henry's family (except Bea and his mom of course) already thought his relationship wasn't gonna last, no need to fuel the fire. 

3: tell them Alex is sick. He would tie Alex himself to keep him away from public appearances for a few days. 

His body thought ahead of his mind when he made his way on stage, making the clapping stop. 

"Hello and...good evening. As many of you already know, I'm... I'm Henry George Edward James Fox Mountchristen Windsor. I am definitely not Alex Claremont Diaz." A few laughs were heard at his attempt to break the ice. "But for now I'm--" 

"--presenting your awesome boyfriend, I suppose." A voice was heard on stage behind him before everyone started clapping again. The first son stepped not that close to Henry as he started talking with his microphone. 

"The thing is... Henry...I'm not going to say his whole title you know it..." More laughs at this. "Suggested to introduce me to you. But maybe there is a difference in the British introduction to the American one as there is... To everything." Alex's forehead was sweaty, Henry could tell because he was standing so close. His eyes were red, not that much, but they seemed tired. And his voice felt a bit shaky, as if he was running. "But it's fine. I mean we still debate on whether they are called ladybugs or...ladybirds but we can live with that." 

Henry by now figured it would be better to smile a bit because he was just standing in concern (not good for pictures). Alex definitely didn't go home first, and definitely he had almost forgotten his entire speech, due to running. 

"But no matter the differences between us, we have so many things in common. We care..."

𝘋𝘪𝘥 𝘩𝘦? Henry's brain worked by itself. 

"...We love, we need support when we fall and when we rise. That's what makes us people. That's what makes shelters like that unique and worthy fighting for. And the fact that so many people find comfort in a place like this, makes me prouder. For everyone participating and the founders, Percy Okonjo- where is...Pez!" The man appeared behind the curtains, pushing up a smile. "And of course, Henry. Whom I'm very grateful to call mine." Some of the people smiled or awed. "I think that whatever I might say here is nothing compared to everything these amazing kids can achieve. So... Here's to them. Thank you." Alex raised his hand as if he was making a toast and everyone clapped loudly. 

When Pez stayed on stage to announce the next speech, Alex pulled Henry backstage to give him a passionate kiss. 

"Hello, your royal highness."

"You didn't say the speech June wrote--"

"Honestly Wales, you are so fucking lucky I could speak after all that running." 

"Which wouldn't happen if you were in time..."

Alex frowned. "Are we really having this conversation right now?" 

"No...it's not the right place or time. We will have this conversation back home." Henry -coldly- gave him a kiss on the cheek as he moved towards the door. 

"You are welcome..." Alex sighed before moving as well. 

For the next two hours, Alex and Henry stayed apart. Not by choice, but Alex could swear Henry would walk away from the group of people he was speaking with when he would see Alex approaching. He tried to convince himself that it was not intentional. There was no way Henry could know where Alex would go next. But still. 

Maybe it was just the fact that Alex wanted desperately to go back home and sleep till new year's Eve. 

"Hey..." Pez appeared out of nowhere and locked elbows with Alex. "Do you mind if I steal him from you for a moment?" Three people the brunette was speaking with nodded no politely. 

When the couple were far, Pez finally spoke. 

"Alexander, go home." 

Not that Alex didn't want to go, but Pez looked more as if he was begging him to leave so he wouldn't mess their party. More. 

"Almost no one has left yet!"

"Alex dear, with all my love... You look like a zombie. And no. Not like a statement." 

"Oh, wow, thank you...but Henry would absolutely kill me if I--" 

"It was his idea. He is on the car already." 

Henry. Leaving the shelter. On its first anniversary. 

"Oh..." Alex bit his lip. "On a scale of one to ten, how screwed am I?" 

Pez hesitated for a moment. "Umm... Oh, Sandra! Hello!" He moved towards a woman, planting kisses on her cheeks, completely avoiding the question. 

Ten it is then. 

Alex walked out of the building and headed towards the SUV when his phone buzzed for the first time with a headline. 

𝘞𝘢𝘴 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩 𝘥𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘦𝘤𝘩 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘵𝘦𝘳? 

Oh shit... They started hating early enough... 

Alex sat next to Henry, the car door closing behind him. At first none of them spoke. Cash had already driven off and no one made an attempt to speak. 

"How did the class go?" Henry spoke so softly he almost missed it. 

"What?"

"Your classes. Everything good?" 

"Y-yeah... All good." Alex looked at his direction but Henry had his eyes locked on his window. "The party was great. You outdid yourself."

"It was good." 

"You are probably just saying that cause Americans celebrate differently..." Alex attempted to laugh but Henry just pushed up a smile for a few seconds. "Henry..." 

The prince turned his head to mouth 𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳. So Alex just sighed and closed his eyes, leaning against the car door. 

They didn't speak more. Not until they said their good nights to Cash and walked in their shared home, David bouncing around Henry's feet. 

"Now is it time for that conversation or not?" 

"You are really looking forward to it..." Henry petted the beagle, not bothering to look behind him. 

"Just...Fuck. Are you even in the mood to talk or I'm just getting fucking yelled at?" 

Henry stopped bothering with the dog and turned to Alex. David kept walking around them slowly, as if he was trying to figure why his favorite people were cold. 

"Did I yell at you?"

"You look like you want to." 

"And it's not justified you think?" 

"No... I mean- maybe it is. But if it's just yelling, spare me. I'm tired." Alex passed next to him to climb the stairs before stopping. "I didn't want to embarrass you today. And what I said are true. I love you. And I'm proud of you." 

Only when Henry heard the footsteps getting further he raised his face. And only an hour later he found the courage to walk in their bedroom. 

And Alex could swear he felt two hands motioning him on Henry's chest and a light kiss on his forehead. 

"You are a pain in the arse sometimes but I love you too." 

Chapter Text

The next morning, Alex overslept. And over sleeping and Alex are two words that shouldn't coexist. 

Henry made his way to the kitchen,watching Alex fixing his bag for school and holding a croissant between his teeth. 

"Darling, you have plenty of--"

"I'll be back at nine." Alex ate the croissant before kissing Henry's cheek. "Love you."

"Hey! Do you think we can discuss what we didn't discuss yesterday? Maybe even go for a drink." The prince followed him to the door. 

"Whatever you want." Alex got in the back of their car. 

"In our spot maybe?" 

"Sure. Love you." 

"Love you too. I'll text--" The car drove off, leaving Henry. "--you..." 

Henry returned in the house to find David half awake. 

"Walk?" The dog wagged his tail happily. 

It was not long during their walk when David was playing with another friend of his in the park and Henry was sitting nearby when he opened his phone again after the night before. 

𝘞𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘕𝘖𝘛 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘢 𝘮𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦. 🚩

𝘚𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺, 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦. 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦. 

𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩. 𝘋𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘯𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘭? 𝘏𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘺𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳. 

𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘦𝘤𝘩 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵? 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 👏 𝘥𝘶𝘮𝘱 👏 𝘩𝘪𝘮 👏

𝘠'𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮? 𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘳𝘶𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦. 🏃💨

𝘚𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘭𝘢𝘨𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘰 🚩🚩

𝘐 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯. 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯 𝘌𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘥. 

𝘚𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘭. 

𝘍𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘻𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸. 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘰𝘯 𝘢 𝘷𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘰, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 🤷‍♀️

𝘐 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘬𝘴. 

𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘶𝘱. 😭

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦. 𝘓𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦. 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘴𝘩𝘵𝘢𝘨 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯? 

The blonde sighed. Apart from all the articles, he had two missed calls from Philip and some texts from Bea. His sister was more clever than believing the articles but Philip? And his grandma? Henry couldn't let them think he did the wrong decision, not after the last time he saw her. 

Henry now hated that somewhere in the world, his grandma was proven right. He opened his phone to make a reservation on their favorite wine place and to text Alex. 

𝘎𝘰𝘵 𝘢 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 for 𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘦. 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 

Alex didn't respond for the remaining of their walk.Eventually, Henry forgot he was even waiting for a response. 

Henry passed by the shelter to help clean up yesterday's leftovers and around a quarter before nine he went back home to get dressed. 

He didn't know why but he was so sure Alex was already waiting for him at the restaurant. Call it an instinct. 

His instinct was so, so wrong. 

Henry sat at a table near the corner, away from prying eyes and ordered a glass of wine. He was there for a good half hour, watching people come and go through the front door and no sight of Alex. Even his messages never reached him. 

Henry had already drank his whole glass, ignoring the waiters looking at him with pity or concern, when the phone screen lit up. 

𝘚𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺. 𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘸. 𝘐𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺, 𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸. 

It wasn't just the reservation. It was their talk. It was their date. It was the fact that Alex had promised... 

Fuck it. 

Henry left the restaurant from the back door, making his way to the car without a word. 

When he reached home, Alex wasn't there. 

"How classic..." He muttered under his breath. 

When Alex reached home, he was welcomed with complete darkness. Henry was probably asleep already. 

He petted David who was sleeping on his basket and got on their bed behind Henry, passing his hands around his waist. 

They could talk in the morning. 

Alex woke up completely alone with the curtains drew open, indicating Henry was up for a while. Their bathroom door was closed and there was water running. Usually on lazy days, they were having baths together in the morning. But probably Henry didn't want to wake him. 

Alex tiptoed to the door to surprise Henry, his heart sinking when he found the door locked. He couldn't remember a single time Henry had locked. 

Trying to make it up to his boyfriend, he climbed down the stairs, fixed Henry's tea and started making pancakes. Only when he heard footsteps approaching, he stopped everything he was doing to meet Henry's face. 

Henry was looking at his feet as he made his way in the kitchen. 

"Good morning baby!" Alex smiled charmingly, watching him sit down. 

"Good morning." 

"I made you some tea... And there are pancakes on the making so brace yourself for a nice American--"

"Thank you." Henry took the cup from his hands bringing it up to his lips.

Alright... 

Alex grabbed a cup of his as well and sat across him. Still, Henry remained silent. The brunette was still debating on whether to start a conversation when he heard Henry's voice. 

"I was thinking of going to England." 

"Oh... Okay. We can go for Christmas if--" 

"I meant going alone..." 

"Alone? For...for how long? A week?" 

"I'd say...more." 

"Two weeks?" 

Henry sighed and lifted his head to see him. "I don't... I don't know." He went back on his tea. 

It didn't feel like he didn't know. It felt like he didn't want to say. 

"Is there...everything okay?" Alex tried to reach his eyes with a concerning gaze. The blonde looked up to see him, anger behind his eyes. 

"I think you and I both know that everything is not okay, Alex." 

Now it was Alex that lowered his face. 

"I just want to say--"

"The pancakes..." 

"What?"

"The pancakes, Alex!" Alex got up quickly to turn off the stove, one pancake already burned off in one side. He stayed there, leaning against the counter. 

"I called Cash to take me to the airport." 

"Like...right now? Y--your stuff? Your suitcases?"

Henry got up, causing Alex to follow him till the door. He had two suitcases waiting next to David, who was wagging his tail. 

"So you just informed me?"

"What else could I do, Alex?" He gave David a treat to put him inside his travel bag. 

"And you are taking David? I thought you said David was as mine as yours--" 

"Jesus, you want him to stay? Do you promise to take him on walks? Play with him? Feed him?" 

Alex looked away momentarily but flinched when a car honked. 

"That's...my ride." With two quick steps Henry kissed him on the cheek before taking his suitcases and David outside. Alex was left standing at the door until Henry was ready to get in the car. 

"Take care." The blonde said. 

"I love y--"

The only response he got was the door shutting a second later. He wasn't sure if Henry heard him or not. 

Moving inside the house, he wanted to scream. No, he wanted to run behind that car. He already had second thoughts every time Henry was traveling to England even if it was just for a few days, about him leaving and deciding to never come back. June said he was an idiot. But right now he wanted to run behind him.

So that's what he did. 

"In ten minutes your jet will be ready,sir." Shaan got inside a private room in the airport where Henry was seated, fidgeting with David's leash. 

"Yes, thank you, Shaan."

The man stood for a moment before going on. "Isn't Mr. Claremont Diaz coming as well?"

"...No. He certainly isn't." He said sadly. 

"Can I help in any way?" 

Henry shook his head no. "I don't think you can." 

His phone started vibrating. He looked down, hoping to see Alex's name on screen, but instead was Philip. 

𝘏𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘸 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴. 𝘐𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵, he thought. 

When he looked at Cash again, the pair was startled by loud yelling, coming from a guard of his, outside. 

"I'm telling you, His highness requested--"

"I don't give a fu--" Alex burst through the door and stopped when he saw the two men. 

"Your highness, I'm sorry--"

"It's fine. Leave us, please." Both Shaan and the other guard left the room, closing the door behind them. 

"Alex wha--" 

"I'm sorry for...this! But what the fuck, Wales?" Alex yelled. "You pack your stuff, you book a trip to England, you don't say I love you back, what is this?" 

"I'm sorry if that makes me a bad boyfriend... But I'm tired Alex."

"Tired of what? Our fucking relationship?"

"Tired of returning home and feeling like I'm living alone!" 

"Since we have a problem, then how about you face it and don't leave?"

"I wanted us to have a talk since forever. But apparently, every time you were busy."

Alex rubbed his own nose. His phone had started ringing in the meantime,and judging by the look on his face,it was probably work related and really debated whether to take it.

"Okay. Come home and I promise--"  

"I'm sick and tired of your fucking promises, Alex!" Henry yelled for the first time, making the brunette take a step back. 

"I thought you said you will support me no matter what. When I started law school." Alex said. 

"I did. But I can't continue watching you not taking care of yourself and not letting me take care of you." 

"So the best thing you thought is going to London? To the people that thought our relationship was doomed from the start?"

"I'm not going forever. I just need some time. And not all of them thought like that, Alex!"

"But still. You are going there and for the rest of my life, I won't be able to set foot in Britain cause your grandma will assassinate me!"

"Now you are just dramatic... And finally admit that this ongoing fight that you have with my grandma is mostly inside your head."

Alex scoffed. "You are messing with me, right?"

"She has been nothing but nice to you every time I speak to her for the last months. And the only thing you are interested in is winning against her every bloody time!" 

"Well I don't know if you forget that they were against us, but I'm not gonna forget how they made me feel!" 

Henry sighed, his head getting redder as the fight getting heater. "Still these people are my family. And I was raised to stick with my family no matter what. Yes, they might not always be right, they might be hurtful, but you have to forgive them and for--"

"--Sorry but this family way is bullshit!" 

"Then aren't you glad you are not part of my family?" Henry stopped the moment these words left his mouth but it was enough to make Alex freeze. 

"Alex, love..." Henry made a step closer. "I didn't mean--"

"Fuck off." Alex took a step back. "Enjoy your trip, your 𝘙𝘰𝘺𝘢𝘭 𝘏𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴. It must suck being away from 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 for so long..." 

"Alex--"

The brunette walked out, ignoring Shaan's concerned gaze. The only sure thing was that Henry now wasn't coming back. 

Chapter Text

Alex spent all his afternoon in an empty house. 

At first it was just him, cleaning up, doing everything in his power to stop his mind from over thinking. Henry was only gone for a few hours, he probably hadn't reached England yet and he hadn't opened his social media in case anyone saw the two of them at the airport and only one leaving-

The doorbell was heard, making Alex almost drop the plate he was holding. 

Henry was here. He was here, and they would fix it and they would be together--

Alex opened the door, revealing Philip. His smile immediately dropped. 

"Don't be so happy to see me, Alexander." 

"Let me guess, did the news reach the monarchy? Am I getting assassinated?" 

"I...have no idea what you are talking about. Can I come in?" 

Alex opened the door wider. The moment he closed it, Philip sighed, moving to the living room. 

"Nice place you have here. I mean, not my taste still...but--"

"Why are you here, Philip?"

"I need to talk with Henry. Family stuff, you know..."

Alex's heart sank.

𝘈𝘳𝘦𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺? 

"He left a few hours ago to go to England." 

"You are joking... Come on now..." 

"Do I look like I'm fucking with you? He left. We had a..." Alex stopped. He didn't owe him anything. His brother wasn't there. End of discussion. 

"Fight?" Philip asked but got no response. "So, what you are trying to say is that my brother picked up all his things and left?" 

"Yes." 

"All his things?"

"Apart from the piano maybe." 

A sigh of relief was barely heard from Philip. So his work there was done. 

"Why though?"

"There are... Look, a lot of things happened. And yes, I'm an huge fucking asshole. But so is your brother."

"Listening you curse makes my ears bleed..." Philip flinched before sitting on a chair. So he didn't want to go... "Anyway... Listen, Alex, can I call you Alex?" 

Alex raised his eyebrow but nodded as he sat across him. 

"Can I tell you what I believe without being judged?"

"Depends." Philip sighed. "Fine."

"You and I, we don't see eye to eye often, but we are both realists. We had our fair share of public eyes in everything we do but in return, we learned a lot about how the world works. And sometimes...people break up. Divorce. I mean...your own name carries the history of people who loved each other a lot, but not enough to stay together..."

"I don't allow you to talk about my parents. Ever. You can think whatever the fuck you want--"

"Just...think. If you two had to break up, wouldn't you prefer to happen now? And not in ten years when maybe you'd be married or...adopting kids?" 

"I don't..." Alex stood up. The thought of ever breaking up with Henry hadn't reached his mind officially. "Do you need anything else? I have..." 

Suddenly, his phone rang. 

"I have to take this." 

"Of course, I'll leave you alone. Farewell." Philip stood up, maybe waiting for Alex to accompany him to the door, only rolling his eyes when Alex didn't. 

"Hello?" Alex heard the door slam before he picked up. 

"Alex what the fuck?"

"Hello to you too, June." 

"Henry went to England and I had to learn it from Zahra who learned it from Shaan?"

"Well, that's again good. I learned it from an article." Nora's voice was heard. "Hang on... Trouble in paradise? Alex Diaz spotted leaving airport with tears on his eyes."

"Yeah...about that--"

"Fuck the articles. We know they are lying. Why did he go alone? Isn't it Christmas in two weeks? You could go together." 

"I think we are breaking up." Alex whispered. 

"What?" 

"I think...it's over." Alex hugged himself as he let his body sink on the floor. Suddenly, all the weight of the day came crashing in with that realization. "I c-can't... It's--"

"Alex, breathe... Are you alone in there?" 

The brunette said something like yes. 

"Okay, okay. Focus on my voice, okay? All is well."

"He left... I-I was a douchebag and he left..." 

"Oh, Alex..."

"I want him back, June. I want him back even if I'm upset and really pissed and--"

"Alex, fucking breathe, dammit!"  

"And mom will... And Zahra..."

"Me and June can deal with them for now. But tomorrow, they are probably demanding answers." June mouthed at Nora. "Can you stay in line? I'll call Henry." 

"Alex, it's me. Your best friend." 

As June left the room, Nora's voice in the distance, she typed Henry's number. 

"Henry speaking."

"June here..."

"June, before you start--"

"Your supposed breakup with Alex is trending everywhere. What happened?" 

"I don't want to talk about it, right now. I just got out of the plane--"

"Yes, but Alex is a mess. He needs--"

"That was the problem, June. Alex needs, Alex wants... Who asked me what I wanted? The only thing I wanted was to keep him happy...but we're falling apart." 

"Henry... I know that Alex is sometimes too much--"

"No, that's not why I left. I love him, June. But in my try to make him understand, I hurt him...and I don't know if he wants to see me."

"Of course he wants... He is just angry now. Give him a day and--"

"Hang on...Philip is calling me. I have to answer."

"Promise me you'll--"

"Alright. I'll deal with something here and I'll be back, okay?" 

When he hanged up, Henry immediately answered. 

"Hello?" 

"Tell me what I heard from Alexander isn't true..." Philip didn't bother with introduction. 

"Excuse me? Heard? From Alexander? My Alex?"

"Yes. I was calling to surprise you with a visit but instead I surprised your boyfriend." 

"How-how is he?" 

"That's all you have to say? He is fine. Really angry. But fine. Did you pack everything?" 

"Not everything. It's- it's not over. We just had a fight. And I'm willing to fight and make things--"

"At least you packed all the important things?"

"Philip, what do you care about my things?"

"I'm... We will talk about it when I come back. Did you remember father's ring?" 

"...no..."

A pause. Then Philip's voice. 

"Fine. We will talk later. I have a plane to catch." 

"Pip--" The phone beeped. On the other side of the line, Philip cursed. And dialed about number. 

"You have the address. The ring is still there."

"Yes boss."

"Try to make it look realistic."

"Yes boss."

Alex went to bed with his phone accompanying him, June still on the other side of the line. After speaking, or better, Alex speaking for a few hours without a break, he eventually fell asleep, phone still in hand, on Henry's side of the bed. Maybe he could pretend that Henry was working late or something like that and he would be there in the morning. 

Who was he kidding? As exhaustion combined with hot tears lured him to sleep, June hanged up to let him sleep properly. 

It wasn't until the middle of the night that Alex was awakened by the sound of a door closing. He blinked a few times. Did he actually hear that or was it just in his head? 

The only person who would come unannounced in the middle of the night without knocking was Henry. Nothing else made sense as Alex kicked the covers away and moved to the first floor. 

Pitch black. Wouldn't Henry open a light? 

Maybe it was just in your head, he told himself but before turning around to climb up the stairs again, he heard another noise. Someone's footsteps, moving around... 

"Henry?" He climbed down the remaining stairs. "Baby, I'm sor--" 

In front of him there was a man, dressed in all black, with a hoodie on his head. Definitely not Henry. 

Alex barely had time to scream before the man kicked him on the stomach. Fighting in almost complete darkness, Alex managed to tackle him on the ground, the man groaning as the brunette grabbed a heavy vase from nearby and held it threateningly above the man. This vase was Pez's present, so when Alex turned on a small light on the wall next to him, the vase didn't seem such a big threat, with all the colors and sparkle... 

"What do you want? Who sent you?"

The man didn't respond. He was just staring. So much that Alex was wondering what he had found so interesting to look at--

With a loud crack, Alex felt a pain that shot through his nerves, starting from his head to his whole body. He first raised his hand, touching the back of his head, feeling a warm liquid flow and make a mess on his fingers. Then he heard the dripping sound of small drops of blood, hitting on the floor. 

He was hit. He was hit on the head from... 

Turning around, he saw a second man, holding something that seemed like a hammer, bloodied as well. Alex barely had time to register that he was hurt, he was bleeding, there were two, not one, unknown men in his home and Henry was in fact not there and wouldn't be there for now... 

He swirled a bit before his whole body collapsed in the small pile of blood. 

"Philip won't be happy..."

"Shut up, you want him to hear?" 

"He's fucking dead, man. He can't hear nothing." 

And then everything went dark.

Many kilometres away, Henry checked his phone for notifications under the table. He knew that in America right now, it was barely five a.m and probably Alex was asleep, but he couldn't help but wonder. 

"Earth to Henry..." Bea moved her hand around to catch her brother's attention. Henry left the phone to rest on his thigh as he moved his hands back on the table. Martha had left the room with her younger daughter seconds ago while the older one, Penelope was drawing on the other side of the room, humming a song. 

"Can you tell me what bothers you, love? And now the same nonsense about a little fight. Because you don't come all the way here for a little fight..." 

"Bea, I... I don't know what..." Henry sighed. "I messed up. I shouldn't have left..." 

"Do you know what I think? That maybe a phone call for now isn't a bad idea."

"I'll...I'll wait two hours at least. Alex is probably asleep now, last thing I want is to wake him. In the meantime..." Henry reached to take his sister's hand. "I have a lot catching up to do." He pushed up a smile. "Come on, tell me your news..."

The doors burst open, and Philip walked in, fixing his tie before his eyes rested on Henry.

"Dad!" The girl squealed and rushed to his hug. 

"Penelope! What did we say about our inner voice, sweetheart?" 

The girl lowered her head as she made a step back. 

"I really didn't expect to be the one waiting you to return from America..." Henry commented. 

"People change." Philip's eyes fell on the tea in front of his siblings. "Am I not invited to the sibling gathering?" 

"Don't be like that..." Henry stood up to pat him on the back. "Glad you're home. I wish Alex and me were...better hosts right now so you could stay--"

"It doesn't matter. I just wanted to see my little brother. Did you see grandma yet? Or mom?" 

"Not yet. Gran was busy. Mom is not home."

"Mom went to the opening of a shelter with a prime minister or something, I can't remember who. But she'll be back in time for the meeting with Gran." 

"Speaking of which..." Philip checked the time. "I better get a quick shower so I can go as well." 

"Dad, I made a drawing! Would you like to see? It's me, you, mom, aunt Bea, uncle Henry--"

"Penelope, I promise I'll see it after we are done, alright?" He turned to his siblings. "Martha?" 

"With Elizabeth. She took her to sleep."

"Good, good. Henry, do you want to come to the meeting as well?" 

"Well, I... I don't think I'm welcome--"

"Oh, nonsense. Why don't you think of it while I take a shower, alright? And then we go together."

"About the ring you mentioned--"

Philip's phone started ringing, making Henry stop. 

"We will talk later. I have to take this. Hello?..What do you mean wrong?"

"Daddy!" Penelope whined and moved to hug him, only to get moved away. 

"Not now. Please..." Philip closed the door behind him,his voice getting further away. "What went wrong exactly?" 

Henry sank on his chair again, checking his phone once more. 

"Henry..." Bea gestured towards their niece, looking at the door with disappointment, as if her dad was gonna walk in again. 

"I heard something about a pretty great drawing with me in it..." The girl's face sparkled with joy again and rushed next to her uncle. 

"Look uncle Henry..." She gave him the paper and tried to sit on his lap, Henry supporting her with his arms. "This is me and my sister. Next to me is mom, dad, granny... This is aunt Bea. This is you. And this is uncle Alex." 

"Oh, wow... That's a lot of people. You're pretty talented." 

"Thanks!"

"Wait, wait..." Bea laughed. "Uncle Alex is taller than uncle Henry here."

"For real?" 

"Yeah..." 

Henry took a closer look. Indeed, Penelope had drawn Alex taller. 

"Uncle Alex told me."

"Told you what honey?" 

"That if I make him look taller than you, he would watch Star Wars with me."

"He did?" The blonde laughed. "And you betrayed your uncle for Star Wars? How betrayed I feel..." 

"It's not my fault, uncle Henry! Mom says it's not for my age and I should ask my dad." 

"And what does dad say?"

"I don't know. He is always busy." Her smile dropped, but continued to draw while sitting on Henry. "I don't think dad loves me."

"What? No, sweetheart... Who told you that?" Henry rubbed her hand and Bea brought her chair closer. 

"He never has time for me. And he always promises we will do things together, but we never do..." 

"Penny, your dad...your dad adores you. He loves you so much."

"And sometimes... Grownups are busy. It's not pleasant, it's not nice. But it's part of life. The important thing is what you do when you are together. To make every moment count. Do you think I love you less because I live far away with uncle Alex?"

Penelope nodded no. 

"Exactly. We all love you, little princess." Bea smiled reassuringly. "And I promise to you as your aunt that you and your dad will have a small movie night today." 

Penelope squealed. "For real? We can watch Star Wars?" 

Henry laughed it off. Bea asking Philip- no, demanding- an unexpected movie night with his daughter was already too much. She didn't want to push her luck. 

"Maybe you should wait until uncle Alex comes to visit. He really wanted to see these movies with you."

The girl smiled and hugged her uncle. "Okay. Can you take some of my drawings back with you in America? It's a present." 

"Present? Oh, wow. Alright." 

As the girl ran out of the room, almost falling on a cleaner due to the rush, the two siblings stayed together again. 

"Henry... I can hear your mind from here."

"Sorry, I just..." He blinked a few times to clear his vision. 

"Henry, you two will make peace. You have lived so much together. It's not possible for Alex to just...forget about them." 

The man squeezed his sister's fingers. She was right. 

Forgetting wasn't something he could imagine Alex doing. 

Chapter Text

Henry eventually agreed to come to the meeting, so in the next two hours, he was sitting next to his brother, across him was his mother and on the head of the table the queen. The meeting included the Royal Court, meaning five more people were also in there. 

With Henry missing for so long, he didn't feel as if he had a right to decide on anything. So he just sat and smiled, sometimes saying if he agrees or disagrees and that's it. 

"Also, crown Prince Philip, there are again rumours of you and Martha, expecting." 

"Again? We barely had Elizabeth like...six months ago."

"And again, I believe we need to promote the girls better. Half of the British people absentmindly forget that you had two daughters already."

"I agree." The queen spoke. "Penelope is old enough to understand."

"But she is uhm...quite disobedient out in public. I can't understand how in here all is well and outside--"

"Maybe you are putting way too much pressure on her." Henry blurted out before thinking. Everyone turned to look at him. 

"I'm not pressuring her more than any other Royal was pressured before her. And if anything, brother, I do it to make her strong and confident--"

"Philip, she is a small child. And she is smart. She knows what she needs, and what she needs is love. Then I believe she'll be more willing to...go around like you do." 

Philip had opened his mouth to say something, but Katherine's words and calm aura stopped him. 

"I agree with Henry." 

The whole court stayed silent. Not even the queen spoke. 

"Alright...moving on,shall we?..Prince Henry, there are rumours concerning your relationship with Mr.Claremont Diaz after your unannounced flight here. Some others, are speculating that something is wrong here, concerned about...your health, your majesty."

"We cannot have that."

"Yes, uhm...if I may... The main reason I came here for was to...see you, of course. But also to...take a break. Not from Alex. Not from what we have. I just... I just needed a break." 

"This does not make much sense, Henry. We can't obviously say all that and expect the rumours to die out." 

"Philip, your brother said he has come here for a small break. You are not giving him any, darling." Katherine smiled softly. 

"We cannot have that. Henry, with everything going around, I suggest you either bring Mr. Diaz with you here or, even better go back and say that it was simply a family visit like any other. Now, for the images going around with you, sitting alone in a restaurant, I believe it's better to say that you were expecting someone else, like a friend or a partner. That or..."

"Or?" 

"Or we say that you broke up, your highness. And you return back to Buckingham, where we welcome you with open--" 

"I don't... It's not over. Not until Alex or me says so. And if I have to go back to not spark rumours, I can leave right now." 

"Henry, love...you are more than welcome to stay here for as long as you like. Rumours or not." 

"Princess Katherine, it's not that easy I am afraid..." 

"Why don't we take a break?" The queen suggested, but her sharp features looked more like a demand. The Royal Court picked up their things to leave the room immediately. Henry was ready to do the same but Philip pushed him back. 

"Now that we are alone... What happened, Henry?" 

Honestly, Henry was tired. He thought that by being here for a few days he would get the love he so needed the last days. But instead he felt like a burden. 

"We...fought." Henry pushed back his tears. Last thing he wanted was to be seen crying. 

"Honey..." Katherine reached out to touch his hands. "It's going to be alright..."

"Henry... I hate to say that I knew we would reach this part... But I did. Honey, you are not like them... I don't mean to sound harsh, but... It's the way it is. Diaz is--"

A knock on the door. And Bea's quick steps, rushing inside. 

"Beatrice, what have I told you about coming unannounced?" 

"I'm sorry, I..." Her eyes fell on Henry, watching with sadness or maybe grief? "Henry... It's Alex." 

Henry stood up. "What happened?" 

Philip lowered his head while Katherine stood up as well. 

"Bea what happened?" Henry's eyes were searching for answers. 

Bea only approached slowly to show him an article on her phone.

𝘍𝘚𝘖𝘛𝘜𝘚 𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘫𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘢𝘤𝘬. 

Henry barely had time to process the information before his body failed him. He choked back a sob, cupping his own face. 

His mother came to support him, scanning the words quickly with her eyes. 

"Oh my God... Alex got injured..."

"How? When?" The queen asked so many questions, but Henry had no answers. 

"Henry..." Philip touched him on the shoulder. 

"I-I have to go... I have to be with him..."

"Henry, if it's an assassination attempt, then you should stay here, safe--"

"I don't want to be anywhere he isn't." He breathed heavily. "Bea, please tell Shaan. I'm leaving right now."

"Henry, it is not a good--"

But the blonde had already left, leaving everyone behind. 

After eight hours of flying, Henry finally went back to America. Counting the seconds until he reached the hospital, he checked his phone once more. Apart from some missed calls from Ellen, June, Nora and an unknown number nine hours back while he was in the meeting and a text from Zahra texting him the name of the hospital and the room number, there was nothing. 

"Zahra!" Henry ran towards her on the hallway. She was startled by the voice but didn't show it. Instead she just rubbed Henry's hand. 

"How is he?" 

"He is out of surgery. Stable now."

"Stable? What else? Will he need surgery again or--"

"Henry..." She said loud enough to stop him. "The first diagnosis that the doctors told us was...that he wasn't going to make it. Not till he was out of surgery." 

"Don't make it- h-how not make it...?"

Zahra took a quick look around before showing Henry the papers she was holding. 

An announcement, like the ones the White House saves for emergencies. And then more scribbling, notes here and there... 

And where Alex's coffin would be buried when the doctor would tell them the bad news. 

"I didn't want the girls to see this. Ellen and Oscar obviously know,and I wouldn't show it to you, but you had to understand that being stable... finally, after nine hours at the E.R it's everything." 

Henry managed to only nod, his body getting number and number. 

Alex, his Alex, is he even his? Fuck, Alex Claremont Diaz was on a surgery table everyone expected him to die on and Henry was traveling. 

You could take his heart and stab it and it would hurt less. 

"His parents are in the room with him." 

Henry nodded half heartedly before moving towards the room. Outside, June was resting her head against Nora's shoulder, barely opening her eyes to acknowledge Henry. 

"I called you when we found him."

"I'm sorry..." He said honestly. "I'm sorry I wasn't there." 

"That's...clearly not for now." Nora passed her arm around June's shoulder. Her mouth turned a bit upwards to say. "He is stable." 

Leo opened the room door and walked out, smiling faintly when he saw Henry. 

"Hey... Alex hasn't woken up yet. Ellen and Oscar are inside." 

"Alright. Thank you." Henry now realized they didn't want to say anything more in front of the girls. Most likely it was June who found him, or a bodyguard, but mostly after Alex didn't respond to June's calls so... 

He makes a mental note to ask later. 

Leo looked like he wanted to say something more, but Henry didn't stay to listen. Instead, he took a deep breath and opened the door. 

On the bed in front of him was Alex. Sleeping peacefully if it weren't for his heavily bandaged head and a tube, sticking out of his hand and mouth. Ellen and Oscar both turned their heads to see him. 

"Hey, mijo." 

"Hey... How is he? Did the doctor say anything?" 

"Well, nothing for now. The anesthesia has worn off. We are waiting for him to wake up. The doctor reached you?" 

"No... And I thought I was his emerg--"

"That you were his emergency contract? You were. But after the doctor couldn't find him, he called the second emergency contract. Me." Ellen raised her face, tears on his eyes. "Alex couldn't wait eight hours you see."

"Ellen, whatever you say--" 

"Save it. I don't want to hear it."

"Ellen, it's not Henry's fau--"

"Stop it. Just stop it." Ellen stood up, furious. "I need some air." 

As the woman left, Henry lowered his head. 

"She doesn't blame you, Henry. She's just tired. And we don't have any news about the robbers yet so..." 

"It's my fault though. If I hadn't left... We would be together. When these people would come, we would be together..."

"Answer me this. Do you think they would spare you?"

Henry shook his head. "No. But Alex... wouldn't be alone." 

"Henry, a few days ago I got a call from Alex at three a.m. He was studying and decided to run around the block and he called me accidentally while running. If the robbers decided to break in then, would Alex be there?"

Henry shook his head again. No. 

"Would you want Alex to feel guilty like you do?" 

Henry teared up. "I love him."

"I know, mijo. And he knows too." 

"I just want him to be fine. And then if he never wishes to see me again that's fine, but I want him to-"

"Henry, breathe... I can't imagine Alex ever being so cruel. If staying here doesn't help you, I'd advise to go back on brownstone."

"I'd...rather stay here. If that's okay." 

Oscar smiled. "I'll keep an eye on Ellen. On the meantime..." He showed him the chair next to Alex's bed. 

The blonde only managed to give him a quick look of gratitude before sinking down and taking Alex's good hand on his lap, playing with his fingers, hesitantly at first, gaining more courage after Oscar turned around and left the room. 

"Hey...it's me, Henry." He choked back a half sob, half laugh. "Now if you were awake you'd say to me of course you know who I am... God, I wish... I wish I... I was a better boyfriend. I wish I wasn't so... I don't know? Selfish?..And now again if you were awake you'd say a joke, although it's too soon for jokes. And you would say something sweet, something that would make me feel like an obtuse fucking asshole for leaving you and that would serve me right. So if I might be selfish one more time... Please, love... Wake up. Wake up and yell at me and curse me and give me hell cause I'm ready to take it. Just wake up. You're my person, you are my boyfriend and the world needs more of you. I need more of you. I need more of your stupid jokes at weird times, or your strong beliefs you fight so hard about, or that radiant smile that makes me want to smile. I need more of our Star Wars movie marathons, our Bake Off commentary, our date nights, our dance competitions at the shelter." Henry wiped his tears as a memory made him smile. "And I need more of our disagreements. Of our mean jokes. Of you, not giving a heck about anything I say even if it's for your own health and doing whatever you want to do anyway. Of me, getting so angry, but so full of love when we find common ground. The thing is... I want all of them. All the good and the bad because I love you. And you are my fa--"

Alex's fingers curled lightly, making Henry stay completely still. 

"Alex, love? Are you there?" 

Another small movement. 

"That's it. Hang on..." Happy tears flooded Henry's eyes as he pressed the button next to his bed. 

He knew that Alex was a fighter. He knew that he wasn't going anywhere. Nowhere where Henry couldn't follow. 

Chapter Text

For the next two days, if not for some small movements on the fingers or his face twisting a bit, Alex showed no improvement.

The anesthesia had worn off from the start, so now it was up to Alex to wake whenever his body felt ready. 

Henry would continue talking to him, maybe reading him pages from Pride and Prejudice every now and then and crashing outside of the room, just in case Ellen wanted to stay close to her son during the night and Henry's existence there was not the best for her. When Oscar or Leo would convince her to go home to change or rest, Henry would go inside again and continue their conversation from where he had left it. 

"...My brother Philip has a second daughter now. I mean...you knew that, obviously, we went to her baptism. But... I think you would love her. Penelope continues drawing you taller than me. I guess she really wants to see Star Wars with her favorite uncle. And uncle Alex of course." Henry joked before he heard the door clicking and Ellen getting inside, coffee in hand. 

"Oh, I'm..." Henry stood up. "I'll...be outside..." 

"Henry... Is my face so hard to look at?"

The man stayed silent, puzzled, as Ellen approached him. 

"No...But mine is." 

There wasn't pettiness in his voice. Just honesty. 

"Henry, I... I don't blame you for this. Is that what you want to hear? I don't." Ellen moved next to him and sat beside Alex's bed, turning her back on Henry. 

"When I...was pregnant with Alex...I had a hard labour. A hard case. The baby -well, Alex- was tangled on his cord. It took him minutes after he was off me to breathe for the first time. I was so scared he never would..." Ellen grabbed Alex's hand. "Then again when I was running for president, Alex would introduce me before a speech, in Kansas, I think? I can't remember... Then we heard a gunshot, then a couple more." She now sniffled. "They got me off stage and away. June wasn't up there with us, just me and Alex. I spent half an hour looking for him in the panicked crowd while counting the gunshots in my head. The whole point is that every time something went...bad, Alex would look at me with his stupid little smile and I would want to kill him but also I would... Consider myself dumb for panicking in the first place. So having Alex survive through everything, the person who fought even for his first breath so hard...to lose him from some damn intruders... It's just. Not. Fair." 

Henry sighed deeply as he sat beside her and grabbed Alex's hand too. 

"You won't lose him. I just know that. He will wake up and look at you with the same old--"

"Wait!..Did you hear that?" 

The whole room fell silent. Only the clock was ticking. 

"Hear wh--"

"Shh..." A small groan escaped Alex's lips. And immediately his hand raised to unstick the cord on his other one. 

"Alex!" Ellen grabbed his hands to divide them. 

"No, no, no... Keep them on, love. For your own good." Henry stroked the place between his eyebrows which was scrunched up now. 

"H-hurts..." 

Ellen flinched at the sound of her son's hoarse voice. Alex's eyes were closed still, but one step at the time. 

"I know love. I promise I'll call a doctor so it will stop hurting, alright?" Henry gave him a kiss on the forehead and Alex hummed. 

The blonde got out off the room, heart flattering on his chest. Firstly he quickly texted the Super Six group chat they had, to let their friends know. June and Nora might want to be there when Alex would wake up. 

"Your highness? Can I help you in any way?" Alex's doctor stopped talking to a nurse and went next to Henry. 

"Alex spoke... He didn't open his eyes but he spoke!" The doctor with quick steps made his way to Alex's room, Henry following him from behind. "That is good, right? I mean...he is awake now, right?"

"It's only a matter of time, your highness. Let me examine him first." 

The doctor did examine him. But no matter how convinced Henry was that Alex would wake up in a few minutes, three hours had passed already. 

"Henry..." June shook him awake. "Go eat something, please. We will stay here." 

Ellen was sitting on the couch, between Oscar and Leo, one hand intertwined with Alex's father and the other with her husband. Oscar looked as if he was praying under his breath. 

"I'm not going anywhere until he wakes."

"Henry...come on. I'll join you. Please..." Nora touched his shoulder. "In five minutes we will be back."

"Henry... Do as they say." Ellen advised him, making both the men sitting next to her startle from her sudden talking. 

The blonde only nodded before looking at Alex. He gave him a quick kiss on the forehead, before leaving the room with Nora.

Five minutes. What difference it might make? 

Henry and Nora had only gone for seconds when Alex started violently gasping for air. 

"Alex? Alex?" 

"Kiddo?" All the four of them rushed next to his bed, Leo pressing the button to call a nurse. 

"Help someone! Alex?" 

That's when Alex opened his eyes wide. 

"Alex? You are safe, sugar. You're safe..." Ellen stroked his arm. "How are you feeling?" 

"Hurts... Head hurts..." 

The door burst open and a doctor, accompanied by Zahra comes in. 

"Something tells me I came just in time. How are you, Alex?"

"Everyone please, one step back." The doctor moved forward, checking the machines connected to Alex. "I'm going to give you some medicine and then ask you a few questions, is that alright Mr. Claremont Diaz?"

Alex groaned when the medicine kicked in again, closing his eyes in satisfaction. "Can someone for the love of God stop the fucking beeping?"

"Unfortunately not...Can you tell me your full name?"

"Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz..." He sighed. "Is that really necessary?" 

"Alex, please..."

"Alright. Moving on. Do you know who is the president of USA?"

"Do you think I don't know? She's sitting next to me! God... I want to know what happened! It's the only thing I don't rem--" 

"Alex! Calm down, okay? For your own good. Nora is outside, Henry as well. We are all here for you."

Alex United his eyebrows in confusion. "Henry? Henry who?" 

Everyone looked at each other. 

"Alex, what do you mean? Your Henry?"

"My Henry? I don't... Are you messing with me? The only Henry I know is the asshole from U.K-- oops, fuck, sorry...has the doctor signed an NDA? Otherwise he heard me curse a prince."

"Doctor...is the medicine making him... illusionary?" Oscar whispered. 

"No...just a little dizzy. But this is not what I'm fearing about... Mr.Claremont Diaz, do you know what year we have?" 

"2019, why?" 

June gasped, holding her mouth. 

"Mom, is THE Henry here? Mom, please, I can't deal with press now..." 

"Not a single camera is here, Alex..." Ellen said. "Just him."

"Then why? I can't understand why he came here if there are no cameras. There is no need to pretend we are frie--"

June started sobbing and got out of the room. Alex stood shocked. 

"What-did I say something--"

"No, sugar... Nothing." Ellen pushed up a smile. "I'm going to bring Nora to see you, okay? Do you want Henry as well--"

"No way... I don't want him to see me like this. Tell him that making all that way to here wasn't needed and...tell him to leave. God... I can't even get hospitalized and get excused from this supposed friendship!" 

Ellen nodded, a tear escaping her eye, and went to leave the room. 

"What happens to everyone crying? Sorry I'm alright..." 

"If you ever say that again, I'll chop your dick off and feed the turkeys." Zahra tried really hard to appear sharp, a sad smile written on her face. 

"Good to see you again, Zahra... All of you."

"We're all glad you're alright, mijo."

Meanwhile June was heavy breathing outside, ignoring the questions for help from nurses. Henry and Nora ran next to her. 

"June?"

"June, what is it? Did something happen to--"

"He can't... He can't..."

"He can't what? Is Alex awake?"

June nodded. And Henry was ready to get in the room before Ellen opened the door first, the doctor catching up with her. 

"Did you tell them?"

"Tell us what? What's wrong with Alex?"

Ellen breathed in. "He...can't remember a few things. It's like a huge memory gap..."

Henry teared up. "It's...It's fine. We can help him, I can help--"

"Sweetheart... His last memory was in 2019."

Henry looked around, taking in everything he had just heard. 

"He can't...remember me?"

"He does remember you. He just remembers... The old you."

The old him. Before their friendship, before the new year's kiss, before the scandal, before their home... 

The him who Alex hated. 

And Henry burst out laughing maniacally. "It's...it's really good. Good one, you almost had me for a moment..." His teary eyes met Ellen's and his smile dropped. "It's a joke, isn't it? Alex wants to make me pay for being a dick -excuse my language- right?" 

Ellen nodded no. "I'm sorry Henry... I told him you were here and...he doesn't want to see you. He thinks you are here for the cameras."

"But, I'm not..." He turned to the doctor. "Is there hope to remember again?"

"I'm going to be honest with you, your highness. Four year gap is too much. I advise to inform Mr Claremont Diaz about the correct date, and maybe...some small facts on his life as it is now. I would refrain from telling him anything that might shock him. And in the meantime and after taking the medical help he needs mentally, if he doesn't remember...then you can tell him some more." The doctor said. "If you excuse me..." He left. 

"We can...arrange a psychology visit with Alex."

"But that means... He won't know about us, right?"

"Henry, this is exactly the thing that will shock him."

"Yeah...remember that the 2019 Alex had no idea he was bi in the first place. That's a lot to process." Nora commented. 

"And...that's it? I'm going back to London?"

"No one said that, honey. I mean technically you have to act like you are friends. That's enough of a reason to be here. Brownstone will probably let Alex remember more things but until then, I suggest we make it as Alex-like as possible." 

"So I move out."

"This will always be your home Henry. Always. This won't change anything. But I just thought this would be good for him--"

"No, I...I agree. I knew we would come to this. If you excuse me..." Henry left the group quickly, not minding the voices calling him back. 

He didn't stop speeding until he left the building. Shaan was talking on the phone outside of his car. 

"Sir?" 

Henry slammed the car door as he got inside and typed his sister's number. 

"Henry? Hey! How's Alex?"

And that's when Henry broke down. 

Alex was fine. He was alive and awake and that was the most important part. But it wasn't fine. Because Henry was selfish. 

"He can't remember a thing Bea! Not a single thing that happened the last four years!"

"Which means... Oh love..."

"I don't know what to do! He didn't want to see me, he probably never will."

"Love, he will remember again. You'll see." 

"It's not easy, Bea. I don't think it's possible."

"Henry, you made him love you once. How hard is it to do it again? Now you know him, you know everything about him. You will make less mistakes, you have nothing holding you back now. You can love him properly." 

Henry focused on his breathing. Yes, Bea was right... 

Two days ago, they didn't know if Alex would survive the night. Henry could work with a memory gap. 

"Bea, have I ever told you that you are a bloody genius?" 

"Not as much as I would like." Bea laughed. 

"Alright, I...Thank you. I have to go. Bye." He hung up. 

Bea was right. Alex loved him once. Henry would make him love him again. 

A week had passed already and Alex was finally getting released. He would need to come back for more exams again, but he was more than happy to leave. In the meantime, Henry stayed in Pez's house, not even wanting to face the brownstone as it was now. Alex's phone was cleaned of all social media, even google, and their house was protected more by secret agents, scanning the area for any threat. 

"So mom won again?" Alex was grinning next to his sister inside a black SUV. Ellen, just smiled. 

"For the millionth time in seven days, yes..."

"Wow, I just... And Texas went blue? Like fucking blue?" 

"Yes, yes and yes." 

"Did I wake up in a fucking alternate reality or something? It's just...so much to process."

"I get that, but I promise sugar, you will remember everything." 

"How did Texas turned blue?" 

"Alex..." 

"Don't you want to know anything else? Enough with politics."

"Okay... Why did I pick law school?" 

"Well, it seemed like you really liked it."

"And I don't like politics anymore? Bullsh--"

"Alex!"

They both knew that Alex was having a hard time realizing that he had no memory of four years on his life. So they didn't judge his outbursts. He was already as calm as he would get now. No need to be pushy. 

"Okay...here we are..." Ellen opened the car door and the new Alex saw his house, his brownstone for the first time. 

"This...is mine?"

"All yours." 

 Alex looked around. The house had a lot of things that he would choose. There was a huge TV on the living room, a large couch and two armchairs.

It was the things he wouldn't choose that troubled him. 

The kitchen had so many cabinets for his liking and most of them were half empty. The bookcase was also half empty. Many walls had nails but no pictures while other walls had pictures with him, June, Nora or his parents. 

Weird, Alex thought. This wall would be great with some pictures. 

"Is this a new artistic movement?" He pointed at the empty ones. "Because my home looks like the robbers that cracked my fucking head open stole everything!"

"Well no, it's... You were thinking about moving some things around. But you didn't get the chance."

"Okay..." He answered uncertainly and looked at the stairs. "I'm guessing my room is up there?" 

The women nodded yes. 

Alex had the same thoughts about his room. The bed was enormous, like the one at the White House but with a foreign elegance. It wouldn't be the first bed Alex would pick. This house as it was now, wasn't exactly how Alex had imagined his home. And it made him sad. Maybe the new Alex was fun and good. But he had differences the old one couldn't accept. 

"So I live here..."

"Yep. There is also a guest bedroom, your room has its own bathroom and there's another bathroom downstairs." 

Ellen's phone rang, making the woman excuse herself and leave. 

That's when Alex grabbed his sister. 

"Can I ask something?"

"Since when do you ask?"

"Was I...living here alone?"

June tried to remain calm. "I...I don't know what you-"

"June... There is no fucking way this house is mine!"   

"Alex I guarantee that you live here."

"Yeah, but...alone? Did I have a roommate or someone that you kicked out hence the pictures missing?" Alex joked but June just laughed awkwardly. 

"No, you lived alone. I know it seems weird now, but you did. The doctor told you, maybe you won't realize why you did some things but remember, there's a big difference four years make." 

"It sucks. I...I feel as if I have lost my balance."

June smiled. "You'll find it again, Alex. I promise--"

"Something else... Did me and... Henry. The blonde British idiot. We actually got along between these four years?" 

"Well... Yeah. Things are...fine."

"So we are on good terms?" 

"It's... Things are fine." 

"Like friendship? And at what level? On a scale from one: I tolerate you but I might be the one to kill you to ten:people are writing fanfics and we have the best bromance."

"Well, you are definitely... Fine."

"You said that three times now."

"God, Alex, how am I supposed to know? I'd say...totally five? Like you tolerate him and there are fanfics of you but there are also fanfics about you and Macron and Macron didn't come to visit you in the hospital, but you also like talking to him but if he died you'd most likely be the main suspect. Do you understand?"

Alex shook his head. "No..." 

June exhaled. "Good. Do you need anything else? Cause I have to make a very quick phone call at my job..." 

Ah yes, June's job. Sometimes Alex would forget about it. 

Alex traced a chair, placed on the other side of the room, across the bed. The armchair was green velvet and Alex could almost imagine someone reading a book here, next to the window. But not him. 

The figure was distant. But yet so warm. 

𝘋𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘮 𝘐 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘦? Alex could swear he imagined someone say this and then laughing. 

"June...a last one. Did I...have a girlfriend?" 

"G-girlfriend? Uh...nothing that I know about. And I would know." 

"Okay... I'll keep that in mind." 

As soon as she walked out, Alex sighed. He felt like his life and everyone in it had moved on, they were inside a moving train that wouldn't stop for him. 

And Henry? 

His mother was reelected, almost four years had passed in the meantime, Henry had no business coming to the hospital if they had faked it. So much time had passed since his brother's wedding. What was done was done. 

Even leaders that made Alex think he was their favorite didn't even make a phone call to wish him to get well soon. 

So why Henry passed Atlantic to see him? 

Chapter Text

Nora and June had decided to stay for a few days, keep Alex company since apparently a house with no WiFi, electronic devices (that worked) or people was too lonely. The girls took the guest room while Alex stayed on his original one. 

June and Nora were laughing about something on the couch while Alex was absorbed in his own thoughts when June's phone rang. 

"Wait a bit... It's Pez." June moved from the couch towards the kitchen. 

"Wait Pez? Who's Pez?" 

"Oh, hello to the dead. Pez is a...friend."

"My sister's friend or..." His eyes widened. "Wait, Pez like... Pez Okonjo?" 

"Well... Yes, sort of..." Nora bit her lip. "So you remember Pez."

"I remember his name on Henry's fact sheet. I should know. I learnt it by heart." 

"By heart, huh?"

"It's not easy to forget a man who likes Charles Dickens and names his dog David! If stupid decisions had a name, that would be Henry whatever his other names are."

"Rude." 

"Well, I gotta keep the tradition going one way or another." He approached the couch. "Nora... Is it true that we are...friends?"

"You and me? No I tolerate you for fame and money."

Alex raised his middle finger. "I meant me and him."

"Why the sudden interest?" 

It was true, why? Why Alex seemed so weirded out (obviously) but also so obsessed over his friendship? The Alex he knew would rather chop off his own foot before getting to know Henry without the insults and everything. 

"It's just seems weird... Like, what do we even talk about?" 

"Well... I can't know that, can I?" 

"So not only we talk but we find common ground?" 

"Alex I'm gonna stop you, before I find out your obsessive ass has made a voodoo doll of him." 

"No, wh- fuck off! I'm trying to get answers and none of you are answering all my fucking questions!" He sat on the floor. "And for the record I'm not obsessed with him. He is!"

"Whatever you say." Nora turned her head to see June walking back in the living room, phone still in hand. 

"Pez called to say..." June stopped. "Sorry, force of habit, Pez is-"

"I told him who he is. What does he want?"

"To wish get well soon to Alex. And if he could come by to see us. Tomorrow maybe?" 

"Like what, here?" Alex raised his voice. "He knows where I live?"

"Alex, love, your antisocial is showing." 

"Just...whatever he can come. But I have a doctor appointment tomorrow afternoon and mom will literally kill me if I don't show up-"

"Then night it is!" She returned to the phone. "How about nine tomorrow? Yes, good. You can bring Henry." 

"Henry is here?" Alex stood up. "I-I thought he left for Britain." 

"Well, I forgot to mention that... He is here. Still." 

"Wow... The monarchs are trying really hard to convince me they don't do shit apart from waving." 

June glared at him. "Sorry, my brother is still sedated. And sorry in advance for what you'll hear tomorrow. Okay, night night. So..." She clapped her hands. "Pez, like the billionaire Pez and Henry, like Alex's archenemy are coming by tomorrow." 

"Good. Call me to return home when they'll leave."

"You know, I always knew you were an antisocial little shit but now-"

"Do they...do they even know about my case? Like we kept it hidden from the media but do they know? Because otherwise, Pez is gonna walk in here, probably calling you two with weird pet names and prince Charming is gonna sit by and just be the snobbish self I remember him to be and I'm gonna have to pretend to have a great time for two hours."

"Alex, like it or not, these people are not the selfish pricks you think they are." 

He turned to Nora. "What are the chances of me pretending to faint to get away from boredom?" 

"Eight per cent." 

"It seems like you lost your talent."

"You're gonna lose something more precious if you talk back to me, Claremont Diaz..." Nora threatened. 

"Okay, Zahra 2.0. Jesus... I'm gonna have a shower upstairs. Hate to be all gross around Mr perfect." 

When the brunette climbed up the stairs, the girls sighed. 

"Was he asking questions?" 

"Of course he was. He feels confused."

"I think we should tell him about Henry. Mom doesn't agree but-"

"He still talks to the psychiatrist about him not pursuing politics. How easily do you think he's gonna take this?" 

June looked down, sad. But then smiled. "My brother is whipped hard though." 

"That he is." Nora smirked. "Are you ready for a second international scandal?" 

"As I'll ever be." 

Meanwhile, many kilometers away from New York, Philip hung up on his brother. 

"All well?" The queen was sitting nearby, reading something, not minding to look up. 

"Diaz still doesn't remember. Henry lives with Percy Okonjo for now."

"I see."

"The good thing is that the media thought that Henry and Alexander are back together. Given the fact that Henry was at the hospital the second it was announced." 

"I can't see how these are good news. The point was for Henry to come back here and forget this nonsense." 

"The good news are that there are no longer theories about something wrong. However the bad news are that one of the so-called robbers, might...have let my name slip around Diaz." 

The queen muttered something. "Amateurs.."

"For now we are fine. But I'm not so sure about the moment he starts remembering." 

"We are fine? Of course we are not fine, you callous and ignorant child! Do you know what we went through to get the robbers out of America before everyone started searching? To cover their footsteps?" 

"I know that, but-"

"Do you realize what happens if they ever find out? And Diaz might remember anytime. It might be in a few minutes, it might be in forty years. We can't risk it." 

"So I send them back? For...another job?"

"No... We find new ones. And we make it look like an assassination attempt." 

"People are guarding him everywhere now." 

"I don't think it will be hard to pass one of our people between the guards."

Philip nodded. "Alright. Does the council-" 

"The council has no other choice but to agree." The queen smiled. "Do you need me anything else?" 

Alex loved the bathroom on his home. Almost as much as he loved the mirror above the sink, where everytime he would step in the bathroom, he would start muttering. 

"My name is Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz. My mother's name is Ellen. My father's name is Oscar. My sister is called June. And Nora is my friend. The year is 2023, NOT 2019. Ellen Claremont is president. I study law. My sister is a journalist."

He usually stops there because that's usually the part where his sister wonders what takes him so long to wash his hands. So he repeats that. And if he has more time, he adds more stuff. 

Alex had mistaken the closets on his room twice by now. And he was only there for a day. 

At first he thought that there were too many wardrobes for one person's clothes. Like, all his suits could fit in one and the rest of it to another. There were no need for four, half empty ones. Secondly, he needed to go back twice to search where on earth he puts his underwear. After quite some searching in all four closets and some cursing, he found them inside a drawer. Good thing that the new Alex hadn't changed his style. 

Underneath a plain, black one, there was another that caught his attention. 

An underwear with the American flag printed on it. 

"You're kidding..." Alex looked at the monstrosity with a raised eyebrow. 

𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘢 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘢𝘤𝘦... Someone, maybe the same figure as before, laughed at Alex's head. 

Why would Alex have an underwear with the American flag? Or maybe it wasn't his... 

If he was living here with his girlfriend, the figure he imagined sitting in the armchair... 

He let go off that thought. The underwear was a man's underwear, so probably his. 

But what if the said girlfriend gave it to him? 

𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘢 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘢𝘤𝘦... Someone said, but it was not Alex. Alex's mind almost mechanically said:

"Well, thank you." 

"What do you thank me for?" June knocked at the door, startling Alex from inside. "All good in there?" 

He would get his answers. 

"Are you not dressed yet?" Alex answered the door of the walk in closet with his bathrobe on to see his sister. 

"Can you tell me what's this?" 

June seemed to debate in in her head for a moment before laughing it off. "Jesus, Alex. Your patriotic self is showing." 

"You and I both know there's no way this is mine!" 

"Who else's could it be? It was in your underwear drawer wasn't it? Maybe it is a fan's present."

Of course...why hadn't he thought of it?

"Yeah... Probably."

"Well, get dressed! Pez texted and they are almost-" The bell stopped her. "Fuck. Get dressed!" 

Alex rolled his eyes as his sister left the room. Why were the guests so important to her? 

Maybe she likes Pez. That's why. 

Or maybe... Maybe he likes Henry. Yeah, it would make sense. The fairytale prince and his sister. 

His heart sinked a bit at this realization. But he couldn't understand why. 

Maybe it was cause he hated him. And his sister deserved better. That's it. His sister deserved better than someone with an emotional range of a teaspoon. 

Making his way downstairs, dressed in a simple white turtleneck and black pants, the four of them were talking at the bottom of the stairs, to busy to even notice him. 

"Alexander!" Pez was the first to go towards him and hug him, making Alex tense at the sudden attack. 

To his surprise, it was Henry who pulled Pez back slightly, as if he knew. 

"How are you dear?" 

"Well...dear...You see how I am." He pointed at his bandaged head. It would stay like that for a while. 

"Oh, poor thing. I brought chocolates and drinks. Wait...can you even drink in that condition?"

"Pez, my head was sewed closed, not my mouth." 

The four of them stayed silent. But then, they all started laughing awkwardly. 

𝘛𝘰𝘰 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘫𝘰𝘬𝘦𝘴? 𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦, Alex thought. 

But then it was time for Henry to say something to him and Alex stopped thinking. 

"Al-Alexander..." Henry said, eyes sort of glistening, while trying to keep a friendly smile and his posture on the same time. "Good to see you."

"For real?" June elbowed him. "I mean... Good to see you too...man..." 

Well, that was awkward. 

After indeed sitting for two hours, everybody were laughing and talking but Alex who was lost in his own thoughts, curled up in the couch. June, Nora and Pez were laughing non stop about something the last ten minutes,while Henry was sitting at the armchair,not really talking and his eyes had a weird sad spark Alex couldn't remember. 

The next thing he could remember, Henry left, probably to go to the bathroom. And Alex felt lonelier than before. Before he had someone to share his loneliness. Even if the other didn't speak because he was probably snobbish. 

He excused himself to go drink some water in the kitchen. He didn't know why but everything felt suffocating and scary. 

Pez wasn't so bad. Under different circumstances, Alex would understand why they became friends in the first place. But now he had a house he didn't remember buying, a career he didn't remember choosing and some new friends the 2019 Alex would never pick. 

"Oh, I'm sorry I thought..." The kitchen door opened and Henry paused before coming inside. Alex turned his face away briefly to wipe a tear. "I thought everyone was inside."

To be honest, Henry thought it was easy. At first. He did it once, he would do it again. 

But after a night with Alex NOT talking at all, he reconsidered. Maybe he was just unwanted. But he couldn't stand the silence. He couldn't stand the thought of Alex not talking to him for the rest of his life. 

"It's fine, I... I wanted some water." He picked up his mug from the counter. 

Why was he apologetic? It was his own house for fuck's sake! He could be in the kitchen if he wanted to. 

Now Henry had two options. To leave or to start a conversation. And Henry was never good at conversations (according to his grandma) but very good at leaving-

"Star Wars?" Henry asked. Of fucking course he had seen Alex's Star Wars mug, he bought it for him. 

"Well, I don't know if your family raised you with The Crown or something like Charles Dickens autobiography, but I was raised with Star Wars." 

"For the record, I haven't read a Charles Dickens autobiography ever. I'm not sure if it even exists."

"You didn't say the same for the Crown." Alex smirked. How was bickering making him feel better all of a sudden? 

"If you had a series made for your family and they casted an actor to play you, wouldn't you want to know who he is?"

"You want to make sure he has a great posture and knows how to wave?" Alex said in a pretend British accent that made Henry roll his eyes. 

"Is that all you think we royals do?" 

"Well, I could send you a copy about why I think monarchy is outdated in the 21st century, but I don't want to be assassinated the moment I step foot in Britain. Nor have Zahra make me learn another fact sheet by heart." 

"So you learned mine by heart?" 

Alex scoffed. "Are you always so full of yourself?" 

"To answer, no. I'm not. And I'd pick Star Wars over the Crown anytime."

Alex's eyes widened. "What's your favorite movie?"

"The return of the Jedi."

"Wrong."

"How can I be wrong with my favorite?" Henry deep down was smiling. Alex was here. It wasn't easy, but that was a start. 

"It's just wrong! I don't know how to say this! Just wrong. And do I get some hopeless romantic vibes?" 

Now Henry rolled his eyes. "What's yours?"

"Empire." 

"Oh, wow...and that's better?" 

"Sweetheart, you come inside MY house to insult my favorite movie? That's some nerve..."

"You started it." 

"How did... Remind me, how did our friends started to hang out together?" 

"I'd say it was after you pushed me in my brother's wedding cake." 

"Yes, but we were MADE to hang out. How did they? Why did they?"

"Because we are very interesting people."

"Deep down. Like really deep fucking down." 

"You know, you never told me. Why do you hate me so much?"

Henry expected Alex to tell him about the Olympics. That would be a good start for bonding. 

"I'm the one that's hating you? You're the one that is so full of himself. You basically sat silent the whole night, judging." 

"That...is not true." 

"It was like you were rethinking all your life choices that led you to say yes on coming." 

Henry by now couldn't say if they were friendly bickering or full on not-that-friendly fighting. 

"It's not as if you were talking much as well."

"I had my skull cracked open, man. I get medicines every morning and night! I can't remember a fucking thing to save my life! I can feel however the fuck I want." 

Henry looked away. He pushed away the tears, last thing he wanted was to make Alex think he's weird. "It must suck." 

"It does."

"For the record, I... I wasn't a good guest tonight because...the last days were too hard for me. A...person that meant a lot to me got injured. Badly."

"Girlfriend?" 

"You...could say something like that, yes." 

Alex's heart felt heavier. So Henry had a relationship. But not with his sister. 

"Sorry for that. Didn't know..."

"Well, not a girlfriend- girlfriend... More like a good friend." 

"That makes sense. I'm pretty sure I'd remember if you had a girlfriend." 

"Would you, though?" Henry joked but when he realized what he said, his eyes widened. This Alex wasn't his Alex. "I'm terribly sorry, it was a bad joke-"

He was cut off by a muffled laugh. And then Alex burst out laughing. And Henry joined him hesitantly. 

"That was good. I'll give this to you." Alex approached him. "Listen, I don't know why or how the fuck we fit. But if you need someone to talk about that...friend..." He extended his hand. Henry was ready to give him his phone but stopped. 

"Alex, I think I have your phone already." 

"For real?"

"Yes. You already gave it to me." 

"Okay... I should warn you though. No-"

𝘕𝘰 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘵𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘴.  

He stopped. Had he told that before? 

"Alex? All good?" 

"Yeah. All good." He managed to smile. "Unless there was something in that wine that you and Pez brought, I drank it, you realized how amazing person I am and now you don't want me to die."

"Don't give me ideas..." Henry put the phone on his pocket. "Maybe next time."

"How long will you stay in New York?"

"It's not as if I have something important to do back home. Why?" 

"Nothing. It just seems weird seeing you here. And in the hospital." 

"You kicked me out in the hospital." 

"Well, to be fair, I just didn't let you in." 

"That's the exact same thing."

"No it's not."

"Alright. Whatever you say Mr Claremont Diaz." 

"It just makes me feel weird, you know. Visit me and not your friend."

"No one said I couldn't do both. And to be honest you are my friend too." 

"You make me blush." 

"Correction. You would be, if you weren't a dick." 

"Wow, cursing much? What would your noble ancestors say, prince Windsor whatever you full name is?" 

"My full name is Henry George Edward James Fox Mountchristen Windsor." 

"Is it now? I just know you were getting picked on at school." 

"Yours isn't any better Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz."

"Honey, your name makes mine sound like a word with one syllabus." 

"Remind me, are we fighting as friends do or as enemies do?"

"Well...I don't know if we are ACTUAL friends now, because I can't remember shit and people just TOLD me, and I fucking swear that if this had happened to anyone I knew, I would absolutely convince them that they were sleeping for fifty years and they had five kids. So how do I know this is NOT the case? I still think you are a snobbish know it all so don't flatter yourself."

"I'm...honoured?"

"But look at us... We managed to talk..." Alex looked at his watch. "ten whole minutes without me pretending to faint to get away from this." 

"I could say we made progress. I mean, last time you remember us together we were covered in wedding cake." 

"First of all, that sounded kinkier than expected. Secondly, like I wouldn't push you again if I had one right now."

"Good to know." Henry just tried to smile when the door opened slightly. 

"Oh, you are- wait, both- here?" June peaked. 

"Yes." The true Alex would say something like 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵! But the new one just rubbed his head a bit and moved towards the door. "Do you think it's late enough or-"

Nora, who was apparently behind June gestured at him to shut up, playfully. Alex almost gave her the finger. 

"I'm more than happy to see these gorgeous faces for more." Pez came and kissed both June's and Nora's hands. 

"Eh-"

"Yes, I'm pretty sure you are. But I am a bit tired. Pez, will you leave with me?" 

Pez looked confused about why Henry would want to leave so early but went with him anyway. 

Meanwhile Alex thought that either the insults he made really Henry snap. 

Or... It was a funny thought... 

Or they were so close that he knew Alex couldn't stay longer without a word spoken. 

Chapter Text

Alex didn't see Henry for a whole week. Not that he wouldn't try to get his sister talking (speaking of England, did Henry went back?), but June claimed she didn't know. 

After his constant asking, he realized he had other greater problems to deal with so he let that go.

His first problem was that he requested to spend Christmas and the weeks before and after, on the White House with his family. Ellen said some like 𝘸𝘦'𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘦, and didn't speak to him since. He got that he had medical appointments to attend and possibly couldn't fly from one place to another all the time, but he would very much rather be home than surrounded by doctors. 

When he phoned his dad, he promised him to talk to Ellen so they can all spend Christmas at the brownstone, and honestly Alex gave up. That was the closest he would get to what he wanted. 

His second problem was sleeping. 

Every night that he woke up after every small sound, thinking someone broke in again, he would rush to the bathroom, saying the same words like a mantra. 

𝘔𝘺 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘎𝘢𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘭 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻. 𝘔𝘺 𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘌𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘯. 𝘔𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘖𝘴𝘤𝘢𝘳. 𝘔𝘺 𝘴𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘴 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘑𝘶𝘯𝘦... 

His bed was really uncomfortable. Or maybe it was just the fact that nightmares were too bad that he couldn't even rest his head properly. The injury was on the right side of his head so he had to lay on his left. The good thing about that position was that he could check the door. The bad thing was that he could see the empty left side of the bed. 

Alex always picked the right side. But maybe a change wouldn't hurt. 

Moving his body on the pillow on the left, he felt calmer. He couldn't figure out why. Just that he did. 

Smelling the comforting smell on the pillow, made him instantly close his eyes and just pause. His brain was here. His memories of weren't. Everything was blurry. Everything but the smell. 

𝘐𝘴 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵, 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨? 𝘈𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘬? 

Alex shot his eyes open. That voice felt familiar but blurry still. And did he almost feel a hand stroking his hair? 

The only response his body could think off was to nuzzle closer to the pillow and bury his face under the blanket, leaving just a small opening for his face, just to check the door. 

Supposing the figure on the armchair and the person that (probably) gifted him the underwear was 𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 a person and not him going nuts, then how about the voice that asked him if he was sick? 

God, Alex had to keep notes of his findings, like when he was little and he wanted to be a detective. Otherwise he would forget even the things he swore to remember. 

"Christmas Day and New Year's Eve is in one week. Don't look at me like that!" Nora emptied a box of ornaments on the couch. "I swear if you don't move your ass and help..." 

After the hospital, at first, Alex was super energetic. So much that had everyone thinking how on earth they could keep him inside as much as possible so he doesn't hear something by mistake. After a few days though, and after some restrictions, to everyone's surprise, Alex obeyed. 

And that was the weirdest thing. 

On the one week he spent home, he asked to go out only four times on the first three days. Afterwards, he didn't even try. 

That concerned the doctor. Heck, that concerned even Henry. 

"Is he eating at least?"

"He does. It's not as if he doesn't get out of bed..." June whispered on her phone at day five. 

At day seven, Alex was covered in a pile of blankets, not even bothering to turn on the lights. 

"Alex? Alex, babe?" The two girls came inside his room, sitting by his side on the bed. Alex only groaned. 

"Feeling better?" 

"My head hurts. A lot." 

"We can see that. Do you need something?"

Usually Alex was a pain in the ass when he was sick. 

"Just close the door when you leave. I can't stand the light." 

The same evening, his sister called their mom to convince her to let Alex travel and Nora called Henry. 

"Does he eat first when he gets the painkillers?"

"We try to, but he usually stops after a few bites." 

How much Henry wanted to wrap him in his arms and kiss his phobias away, cause how dare they make Alex feel scared, only he could tell. 

"And something else...June is now calling Ellen. She wants to convince her to spend Christmas at the White House. And I think she has good chances."

"Alright. I think tha--"

"Yes Mr Paulson, I'll be there!"

By Nora's sudden change at voice, Henry could tell Alex was around. Message received. At least he started walking again. 

"Okay. Can you or June give me an update afterwards?"

"Of course Mr Paulson. Have a great night!" Nora hung up and turned to see Alex, who was already sitting on the kitchen table. "We ordered take out. I'll get you a plate."

June stepped into the kitchen, momentarily startled when she saw Alex. 

"Oh, I... Didn't expect you to come. Are you feeling better?"

Alex just nodded. And that's how most of the dinner went. 

"Alex? Don't you like the food? Do you want us to order--" 

"Did I have a girlfriend?" He asked. 

"You already asked us that, babe." Nora tried to laugh it off. "And we told you--"

Alex let his left hand come to the table. And let a small piece of paper to slide on the surface. 

𝘎𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘏𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘺. 𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬. 

"The truth now."

"Where did you--"

"It had slipped under the bed. You're not answering me." 

"It's... Probably it's a prank. You used to invite a lot of people home so--"

"Yes, and...if not, it's probably from the previous owners. They left in a hurry." 

"And..." June cleared her throat. "I was supposed to keep this a surprise but... Tomorrow someone will come pick us and get us to the White House. Aren't you excited?"

"For real?" Nora said. "Damn! Exactly as you wanted, Alex!"

Was that what he even wanted? 

He had his doctors in NYC. And apparently the 2023 Alex had 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 in NYC. 

But that was nothing the old Alex had dreamed. 

Honestly, it was like a downgrade. Leaving the White House and his family to come here alone, study for a degree he didn't want back then and apparently also having a girlfriend that probably wasn't too great of a girlfriend and didn't even bother visit. That, or they broke up. Which was worse. 

So the only thing the 2019 Alex felt right now was hate. Hate that his future self screwed up his life beyond screwing. He couldn't stand to see the White House screwed. He couldn't stand seeing everyone forcing him to understand that these were the right choices. 

"Have a nice trip then."

The girls looked at him. "I meant you too..."

"Have a nice trip, girls." Alex pretended to smile and stuffed the note back on his pocket before standing up. 

"But...it's Christmas, mom said--" 

"Mom and you and Nora and dad and everyone responded to fucking everything but the questions I asked!" Alex yelled after all these days of silence. 

"Alex, chill."

"Don't tell me to fucking chill, Nora! I'm not-- I don't..."

𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨! 

"Alex..." 

"Can you please leave? I'm asking this as a favor. Please, leave." 

"Alex, we are your friends. You can talk to us... I'm your sister." June approached him but Alex took a step back. 

"June... I'm fine. It's not your fault. I promise. I just need to get over a few things with myself." 

"Alex, I- we ALL love you..."

How much he wanted to cry... 

"If you love me, and I know you do... Leave." With large steps he went back to his room. 

June and Nora left the following day. Ellen had her doubts, she wanted to either fly back to New York or drag Alex back to the White House, but his psychologist said no. She said it would be better for him to feel he has the power to choose. Even if he was surrounded by a million bodyguards in the process. 

Ellen couldn't take it. She made a deal. Either Alex would come with June and Nora, or he would visit his psychologist three times a week. 

Alex said yes to the visits without a fight. Another bad sign. 

The brunette had barely stayed twenty four hours alone and the only thing he managed to do was eat some takeout and watch TV. The tv channels had already disappeared from his device, leaving him just with a few DVDs. 

Alex swore he had seen the same episode before when his doorbell rang. Twice. 

He made his way to the door extremely slowly. But what he saw on the other side was far of his imagination. 

"Hello." Henry smiled. "I apologize for... coming here unannounced. I just--"

"June isn't here." Alex was half hidden behind the door. He was tired and malnourished. And Henry was sitting there, in a fine suit. Henry was the last person he wanted to see right now. He couldn't stand the thought of his worst enemy seeing him fucked up like that. 

Correction. Ex worst enemy. Apparently now friend. Great job, 2023 Alex. You forgave a person for being a dick to you. 

"I know."

"Nora isn't here either."

"I know that too." 

"Then what are you here for?" 

"You." Henry coughed. He doesn't know. He doesn't know... "I meant... I wanted to-- I mean I did try to tell you last time--"

"Henry..." The blonde paused. How he had missed his name on his lips... "What are you here for?" 

"I wanted to invite you to...a party--"

"I'll pass."

"One of the children in the shelter Pez owns has his birthday. He always used to talk about how much he wanted to meet you."

"Does he dream of becoming a politician?" Alex stopped himself. "Sorry, lawyer. I forget sometimes..." 

"No. He just wants to help people. And wanted to meet you. I was considering asking you last time we saw each other, but--" 

"But?"

He sighed. "We were not that close."

"And now you think we are?"

Ouch... 

"No, I... Jesus! Do you want to come?" 

Alex shook his head. No. 

"This kid deserves better role models than me right now."

"What are you talking about?"

"Jesus! Can you take your head out of your ass and see the situation I am in, right now?" Did that sound pathetic? "Last thing I want is to be around people who apparently misses the old Alex so fucking much!"

Henry exhaled. "These kids like you, lawyer, politician or not. They like you for your personality Alex. For your views. You want to come, that's fine. You don't want to? Then go back inside." Did that sound harsh? Henry was just trying to say--

"Give me a few minutes to get dressed. Unlike you, I don't sleep and wake in a full costume." 

He wouldn't do him that favor. Not seeing him like that... 

So he put on the best clothes he could find and repeated the same quote of remembrance in his head. 

And if deep down he figured he could fish information about his old life out of Henry that's nobody's business but his. 

The kids were actually really nice. And actually NOT kids. They were teenagers which was better. Being around toddlers who scream and shout was something that would really affect his fragile head. 

"So, Bradley, a pastry chef?" Alex was talking with the birthday boy next to the buffet. 

"Yep. That was something I dreamt of for quite a while."

"Damn, for real? When I was a kid I wanted to be a singer." 

Bradley laughed as he took a bite from a cupcake. "What stopped you?"

"No, don't worry I don't have a tragic backstory, I just realized with full honesty that I can't sing to save my life." 

On the other side of the gym now transformed into a dancefloor, Henry was observing them with a drink (orange juice, nothing alcoholic) on his hands. 

"Haz, if looks could kill..."

"Pez, don't you have something better to do?" 

"I'm just saying... Bradley won't say anything. Neither will the rest of the kids. I told them twice." 

"Yes, and thank you for this, but--"

"But?"

"I'm scared." Henry turned his gaze at him. Terrified blue eyes met Pez's. "Am I making the right decision? Alex was not fine back home alone, but June said he's searching for clues for his old life. Do you think we put our heads on the wolf's mouth?"

"Honestly? I'm as terrified as you are. But look at that!" Henry's eyes fell back on Alex and Bradley laughing together about something. "When was the last time Alex laughed? Actually laughed."

"I... I don't know..."

"I'll tell you when! Before all that! You all might think hiding things from him will make him better,but in reality it makes him more scared. Like his life was so bloody awful that wasn't worth mentioning." 

"I don't think that we are making the right decision by hiding this. But Alex is still his old self, there are many things he can't accept, and if for the sake of his health I have to hide this, then I will..."

Percy nodded. "Okay... Don't freak out, but I think he's coming." 

Henry didn't even hesitate before turning his head fully to Alex, walking towards them. 

"Talking about me?"

"No!" 

Alex was taken aback at Henry's response. Luckily Pez was there. 

"Don't make everything about you, dear. Enjoying the party?" 

"Yes, it's cool. Look, I...I'm thinking of leaving now. My head's getting worse and I sort of have a pill to take..." 

"When do you have to take it? In an hour? Half an hour?"

"Two hours ago." 

"Jesus..." Henry pinched the bridge of his nose. 

"It's my head that's hurting, man! None of your business." Alex waved goodbye at Pez and went to leave. 

"Then at least let me take you back home." Henry ran behind him. 

"With the car?" 

"No, we are running barefoot. Of course with the car!"

"Fine! Damn, four years really made no difference to your cockiness." 

And somehow a few moments later, Alex and Henry, both sitting next to each other on an SUV, were on their way to brownstone. 

"Why didn't you tell me that you own the shelter with Pez?" The brunette broke the silence, making Henry tense at the seat next to him. 

"I... I didn't think it was important."

"Important? Dude with all respect, what you're doing in there, with the kids, is far more important that what you do in London."

"I didn't mean... I know it is. I just didn't think it would change anything, you knowing who owns it."

"To find out you have a heart? How outrageous! You could have me beheaded for less. And maybe have my head hang on the wall or something."

"Luckily for you, you don't fit my room's aesthetic." 

Alex laughed. Like actually laughed. And Henry smiled. 

"Did you have fun?" 

Damn, it was the best night he had since he woke up. A night that ended on his head throbbing, but left a painful smile on him. It reminded him of life, about people having fun, about people fighting and struggling but continue fighting. About everything he wanted to work for. 

"Do you promise that you won't make a big deal out of my response?" A nod. "It was the best night I had in a while."

"Good to hear." 

"Did the old Alex go to your shelter?" 

"He didn't miss a single time." Henry smiled softly at the memory. 

"So the kids knew me?" Fuck, he must have looked so entitled...Going around, introducing himself, not remembering any names... 

"Yes, but I told them about the accident. They knew not to ask awkward questions."

Alex nodded. 

The car stopped and the brunette realized too late that they had already reached home. 

"So... Here we are..."

"Here we are..." Alex exhaled. And then smiled. "You know, if someone told me that I would be sitting in a car next to you, IN New York, without you behaving like an entitled prick--"

"I'm the prick? And not you?" 

"Whoa, easy mister Fox Christen..."

"Fox Mountchristen Windsor."

"I'll learn it one day." Alex went to open the door but stopped. "Tell me, how did old Alex call you?" 

Henry smiled at that thought. 

During the day babe. H when he was tired, or sleepy or thought that the whole name was too fucking much for now. Sweetheart when he was soft or playful. 

"Did I wake a memory up? Cause I feel like I'm learning all your hidden depths today, sweetheart." 

𝘏𝘪𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘥𝘦𝘱𝘵𝘩𝘴, 𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵... 

"What- no, I...he called me however he felt like calling me. You can't stop Claremont Diaz and you know it." 

Alex grinned. "I'll take that as a compliment. And something else... What pushed you to open the shelter?" 

"Is that an interview?" 

"No, fuck off... Just a question."

"I felt that...queer people today, especially young people, need to feel included. Need to feel like they are loved and cared for, away from hurtful stereotypes...like the ones I grew up with." Did he just--? 

His eyes widened. "So you are..."

"Gay. Yes." Henry said. God he felt like he couldn't breathe. 

Alex nodded. "Good." And opened the door. Before leaving, he put his head back in. 

"Did Alex know?..Who am I kidding? I could have a secret kid or got married at Vegas at this point and everyone would know but me..."

Henry didn't say anything. 

"DO I?"

"NO, NO! You don't!" Henry smiled. "I promise."

"Good." A small pause. "For history, you're doing...a great job in there. See you." 

Alex had just closed the brownstone's door when Henry got his thoughts together. 

Did you come out to him? (If it counts as coming out?) 

Did he leave cause he thought I was flirting,or cause he had to? (I don't think Alex would assume that just cause a person is gay is flirting with him) 

Did he say see you soon? (Does he plan on calling?) 

Meanwhile Alex went straight to the bathroom, shoving his pill down his throat and repeating his words. 

"My name is Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz. My mother's name is Ellen. My father's name is Oscar. My sister is called June. Nora is our friend. We have 2023. I study law. I live in New York. My mother is the president. And Henry..." He raised his face to look himself at the mirror. Why did he mention Henry now? 

"And Henry is my friend." 

Chapter Text

Over the next hours, the news of Alex getting out of the house were everywhere. Not that Alex knew. 

Henry received two phone calls from Ellen that day. The first yelling at him for not discussing it before taking Alex out and the second one, thanking him, cause apparently her son called her back. He wasn't ready to go to Washington, and didn't ask for anyone to come at New York but it was a start. And until New Year's Eve, probably he would change his mind. 

Alex would even speak with Henry. Henry usually sent first and then he would send Henry messages during ungodly hours of the day and night and Henry would respond again, almost immediately, the thought of something happening and Alex being alone again, haunting him. 

Until Alex stopped. Stopped talking, stopped messaging, stopped everything. 

And Henry's thoughts started spiraling again. 

Had he done something wrong? 

Two days had passed since Alex's ghosting and Henry (or better, Pez) decided to pay another visit. 

But now there was not an immediate response. So Henry knocked again. 

"Alex?" When the brunette appeared in the door, he looked... Well he looked like a zombie. Tired, with bags under his eyes, barely even walking, hair a disheveled mess. 

"From my negative reply to your text about asking to see me, what vibes did you get?"

"I didn't get a reply." 

"What?"

"I didn't get a reply. And that was two days ago."

Alex looked down. "I thought I replied."

"It's alright. I just figured we could hang out-"

"Honestly, Henry, don't you have something better to do?" Alex blurted out, stopping the blonde. 

"What do you mean?" 

"It's Christmas! I can't fucking believe you don't have anything better to do!" 

"I... We are friends. You didn't reply and--"

"You came all the way here! Congrats! No for real, congrats!"

"You don't need to become cynical..." 

"But I can't help it, can I? Cause I'm a stone cold bitch that drives everyone away!" 

"I never said that."

"You have a whole fucking family! Go see them!" 

Something like a memory came to him. And the same memory, united with grief came to Henry. 

𝘈𝘳𝘦𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺? 

"I want to be here, Alex. I want to!" 

"Oh good. And the old Alex might want you here but the new one doesn't!" 

Henry stopped. "I hope you have a nice Christmas, Alex." 

Alex just nodded. And closed the door again. 

Maybe this was a tragic twist of karma. That Henry would regret hurting Alex, that Alex would hurt him right back, even unwillingly. 

"I assume things went...bad?" Pez asked the moment Henry sat in the car next to him. 

"Horrific. Bad is not a strong word for this."

"Oh Haz..."

"Am I doing something wrong?"

"It's just too much to process for him. Give him time." 

Henry sighed. "Worst thing is that now I have to call Ellen..."

Meanwhile, Alex was still behind the door. 

He shouldn't have kicked out Henry. It was not his fault. 

Bullshit. It was everyone's fault. 

Alex felt his phone vibrating from his jean's pocket and his mother's name on screen. 

"I figured someone would call."

"Hey, sugar--"

"I'm the one talking now." Alex stood up. "And maybe it has escaped your notice, but I can still speak."

"Alex, what are you--"

"I go for a coffee today since you want me to get out of the house and what do I see at a magazine's cover?"

A small pause. "Alex, we would--"

"Let's see if I remember correctly...Alexander Claremont Diaz: A source near the first family reveals all secrets after attack on first son's life. And that was just the title."

"Sugar it's--"

"And then the source claims I want to be left alone! And I can't still process everything and I'm in shock and fucking lies like that!" 

"Alex--"

"It's a shame I didn't buy the magazine. But it's okay, I'm sure you have a whole documentary series about the attack. Do I have a say in who gets to portray me or--" 

"Just fucking listen for once! We had no other choice. Everyone were talking about you at past tense! The paparazzi wouldn't--"

"Wouldn't leave me alone, you did that for me, blah blah blah. It sucks that everyone knows what's best for me and I don't know a fucking thing anymore!" Alex yelled at the phone, wiping a tear ready to spill. " You know what, screw this, I don't want any of this." 

"How about I come get you home tomorrow, huh? And we can speak. And spend Christmas like we used to-"

"No, mom! I'm fucking done! The old Alex screwed everything up and now I have to continue from where he left me, but I don't want that!" Alex fully sobbed now. "I don't want anything."

"Alex... Do you want honesty? I swore to never tell you this, but fuck it...When we arrived at the hospital, the doctors didn't give us any hope. We, I mean, Zahra started planning ahead..." 

"You...arranged me a funeral?"

Ellen's voice trembled. "Short answer is yes. But people started suspecting that something was wrong after surgery. We didn't appear very sincere apparently and... The press started questioning your brain damage and if we are hiding you for some reasons--"

"And you thought this was the best idea, huh?" 

"Alex, give me a break, sugar! Do you know how hard it is for a mother to see her child--"

"Then imagine how I feel!"

Ellen got calmer. "Do you want me to arrange a flight? Spend Christmas back home, with us..."

"Mom, I... Will you tell me everything? And I promise I'll come." 

"Sugar, I can't do that... The doctors--"

"But every stranger can learn from a close source every fucking detail?..No, I'm done. Fucking done!"

"Alex, put your feelings aside for a second and think of it baby. My Alex deep down would think it was the right choice--" 

"Your Alex is the 2023 Alex, and the 2023 Alex died, mom! 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘥𝘪𝘦𝘥!" Alex took a deep breath. Maybe it was harsh, definitely was harsh. "I want to stay alone."

When Alex closed the phone, the numbness settled in. 

At first he thought, no big deal, he can continue his life with hard achievements of four years added, without even remembering working for them. But these achievements were nothing he wanted. That Alex was no one he knew. 

And he wished he could continue pretending nothing bothers him and joke about his hypothetical Vegas marriage and kids, but not knowing anything you did the last four years? That shit was scary. 

His family accepted his decision to stay in New York. Alex figured the last thing he needed for Christmas was everyone to treat him like something broken and having to act in front of everyone. Luckily his therapist stood by his side. Not that she didn't try changing the conversation a few times during their sessions. 

Alex spent the part of his days that wasn't occupied with sessions to investigate around the house more. To his great dissatisfaction, he found nothing. But then again what would he do if he did? He accepted that this was his life from now on. He had a home in a nice neighborhood, he would see about keeping or changing his law studies after Christmas break and if in the meantime his supposed girlfriend showed up, he could tell her politely to fuck off. So for now his aim was fix the mistakes the 2023 Alex did. 

The dreams stayed. And he was watching the same dream from the day he ghosted Henry till now. 

It was early in the morning. And Alex was sleeping on his bed. But on the right side, not on the left. Everything was bright, everything was calm. And two hands surround his waist. They are familiar, but blurry. The person behind him, also laying down, starts kissing his neck and shoulder. And Alex doesn't feel like he needs to escape. Doesn't feel like he needs to run or get away. 

He feels loved. 

"Good morning, love." The person says between kisses and his voice sounds a lot like... 

Henry... 

Alex woke up panting, for the fourth time in a week. This wasn't a memory. This was his dumb brain that caught the fact that Henry is gay and now started terrorizing him with that fact. 

Why does it matter that Henry is gay? 

Well, for sure it caught Alex by surprise. A prince who's gay. And not in a closet, forced to have heirs and live according to the rules (was he even out of the closet or just came out to him? Alex didn't know) 

Alex deep down praised him for this. He didn't know Henry had it in him. 

Maybe it was better they stayed apart. It would be awkward spending time together if Alex subconsciously had dreams with him on his bed. 

Does this count as cheating? Does Alex have a girlfriend? He doesn't know. 

Does he want Henry? Pfft... No... 

He would know if he was attracted to him, right? Henry was theoretically a handsome man, arguments aside. But he would know if he was attracted to him, right? 

He wanted to call Nora, or his sister and ask them, beg them to tell him why his brain is sabotaging everything. But the thing he least wanted was giving his family more reasons to be dead worried. And to Zahra more reasons to staple his dick. 

So he did the thing he hated more than anything. 

He tried to stop thinking and be patient. 

On Christmas Eve, Alex was watching a recorded episode of Bake off, something he shamelessly did a lot, during the last week, when he heard a knock on his door. At first he thought it wasn't real, he spoke with his family two hours ago and made them swear they wouldn't start the same conversation about coming by. 

Again, this was by far more surprising. 

"Hi." Henry pushed up a smile, a bottle of wine in hand. When Alex didn't speak, he continued. "I know I'm the person you least expected. And I can turn around and leave if you wish. But I have a bottle of wine and enough embarrassing stories to tell if you'd like to...maybe spend...Christmas?With me?"

Alex was staring at him deep in his eyes. Henry was back. After behaving to him like a dick, Henry was back. 

"C-come in..." Alex hesitated for a long moment before opening the door slightly less. 

"Will you give me a minute... I have to bring David..."

"Your...dog?" Henry nodded. "Well, you can't leave him in the car to freeze..." 

It only took Henry a minute to grab the beagle from the car. What shocked Alex though, was David's expression when he saw Alex. 

"Is he always so...welcoming?" The brunette was cut short by the dog's attack of licks on his face and jumps. 

"David is always polite. But he...probably missed you." Henry closed the door behind him and left his coat on the hanger and the bottle on Alex's hands. 

And I've met his dog, Alex thought. Of course...

"I..." Alex had so many questions. Like for example, why was he back? But he couldn't phrase them. Not now. "Wh-why David?" 

Way to go, Alex... 

"Excuse me?" 

"Why did you name him David?" The two men followed the beagle inside the living room, slowly. 

"After David Bowie." 

"Couldn't you just name him Bowie then?" 

"Well, I got used to it. Plus, if you are...a royal, everyone feels like they have a say in things you do." Henry sat on the one side of the couch and Alex on the other. 

"Must suck." Alex paused. "That's why you didn't want to go back for Christmas?" 

"Did I tell you I'd go back and didn't keep my promise?" 

"No, I- no..." The fact that Henry didn't speak to him about his Christmas plans was Alex's fault. He was the one who kicked him out, this was to be expected. But wouldn't he go back to England? 

Maybe he has a gir-- no...boyfriend, here. 

Why doesn't he spend Christmas with him then? 

"Henry, I--"

"British Bake Off?" Henry smiled. "That's really good."

"I don't know why, but apparently I have recorded many episodes. And yes, it's not so bad. For British." 

"You do realise that you mustn't insult Great Britain in front of me, right?" 

"You will have me beheaded?"

"Depends...will you watch an episode with me?" 

"Why don't you bring two wine glasses and I'll put one to play?" Henry left the living room in just a second, David staying curled up next to the sofa. "The glasses are on the second cabinet--" 

Turning around he saw Henry already having two glasses on his hands. 

Now Henry knows where he puts the glasses? 

"Uhm...found them!" Henry explained and Alex didn't push it further. 

Until the episode ended, none of them spoke. Instead, Alex really thought it was better if he never answered the door. At first he was miserable alone, now that he couldn't keep a conversation going, he was making another person miserable as well. 

How did his life turned so shitty that he wanted to cry? 

"Do you want me to put on another episode?" 

The brunette barely heard the question. But made no attempt to respond. 

"Alex?" 

𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴. 𝘔𝘺 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹. 

Alex had definitely seen this written somewhere. 

"Alex? Are you not feeling alright?" He shook his shoulder. 

"I'm sorry." He muttered, eyes still in space. 

"Why are you sorry? If you're not feeling well then--" 

"I'm sorry I kicked you out. That was a dick move. Even if it's about me and you." 

"It's alright. I know it's not easy for--" 

"Still... I acted like a dick to my family, to you and God knows who else..." 

"It's okay..." He traced his thumb back and down, comfortingly. 

"No, Henry, it's not!" Alex was at the verge of yelling, causing Henry to let go. 

"You're right. It's not. But I understand. Whatever you feel, I understand."

Huh? 

All these days...of people behaving like he's crazy for snapping at everyone after his memories disappeared or people supporting him just to calm him down... Henry was the first one to tell him it's okay. 

"Thank you." Alex gave him a sad, but real smile. 

"And to answer your question, no. I didn't want to go back in England. And yes, I might have my...my family back there, but--"

"Henry...you don't owe me a fucking thing." 

In reality, Alex was curious. Was more than curious. But he could be discreet and polite for once. 

"Can I ask a question too?" Alex nodded yes. "Are the ornaments laying around a thing you Americans do?" 

"Fuck you." Nora proceeded to help him. But in the end, Alex didn't have the energy. The tree was left unsettled and the boxes were still unopened. "I didn't have time."

"I can do it now."

"You know how to fix the tree?"

"I'm not good just at waving, you know." Henry stood up and opened a box. "Staring is rude."

"Your face is rude." Alex yelped when a plastic ball was thrown at him. 

"Come on! Help me!" 

The pair spent a while decorating the living room and fixing the tree. Or better Henry decorating and Alex redoing everything just to piss him off. When they were done, they sat back down, admiring their work. 

Alex let out half a smile half a snort. "You know, you are not totally the entitled prick I thought you were." 

"Wow, thank you." Henry smiled as well. "And you are not the lousy, self-centered person I remembered before we became friends." 

"Hey! The key word is not totally...careful!" 

Henry burst out laughing, making Alex sort of join him. Seconds before laughing died out, Henry began to stress again. He had to start a new conversation, before Alex closes back to himself--

"You asked me why I hated you that much." Alex said after a small pause, hands fiddling with his shirt. "You might think I'm dumb but I have a reason." 

"Go ahead."

"It was the Olympics at Rio. My first Olympics. I came up to you to introduce myself and you looked at me like my whole existence insulted you."

Henry knew. Knew everything. But this was Alex's story to tell so he kept quiet. 

"I introduced myself and afterwards, you turned to Shaan and said 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘳𝘪𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦?" 

"I...you weren't meant to hear that, obviously."

"You are missing the point. It was still a shitty thing to say." 

"I know. It doesn't excuse my behavior, but... My dad had passed away a few months ago so I was behaving like a prick to anyone during that period. But still,I am sorry." 

Alex looked away. "It's okay." 

The blonde sighed. "You know when you say something harsh or straight up mean to someone and then bitterly regret it?" 

Alex nodded. "We've all been there." 

He regretted kicking the girls out. He regretted yelling at his mom. He regretted yelling at Henry. 

Alex turned to look at him. "Why do I sense there's something particular in your mind? Cause I doubt your Royal Highness can forget his manners." 

"I...I acted like a complete -excuse my language- douchebag to someone I really care and love. It has been barely a month but... I miss them." 

Alex's brain stopped functioning. So Henry HAS a boyfriend! Or at least had. 

"Well, why don't you try to make up to them?"

"I...I don't think they want me back." 

"Have you told them you're sorry? Talk it out?"

"We didn't have time." 

Alex's face flattened. "Did they...did something happen to them?" 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺... 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹... 

"Sort of... But not- not what you think! Not dying." 

"Do you want to talk about it?" 

Henry looked down. "No...not now-"

"Okay." Alex's mouth tilted sideways. "I'm just gonna say this and then drop it. But I still think it can be fixed." 

"Thank you."

"Now...are you hungry?" Alex stood up. 

"I wouldn't say hungry... More like--"

"Craving something? Like sweet?" 

"Yes." Henry smiled. "Why do I feel you have something in mind?"

Alex did have something in mind. He returned a few seconds later, holding two cornettos. 

"Cornettos?" Henry took one from his hands. 

"I discovered them a few days ago in my freezer. I had like a million." 

"Had?"

"I also had cravings. And boredom. So..."

"I guess there are only two left?" 

"Shut up!" Alex laughed, before taking a bite. 

They continued talking while eating, Henry told Alex about the things his cheat sheet got wrong and Alex told Henry about his childhood. Surprisingly, he didn't feel the need to fish out information. He was perfectly satisfied. So for one night he could pretend they were back in 2019 and Henry was less of a prick (and maybe Alex too) and had all the time ahead of them. 

Five hours later, around 2 a.m., Alex noticed it started snowing. Heavily. 

"Does anyone expect you to be somewhere?" Alex interrupted Henry while he was telling him the story of how he got David. 

"At this hour? Where exactly? At a cemetery?" 

"Haha...very funny. I figured...if you don't need to leave...you can stay tonight." It took him longer than necessary to form that sentence. Was it too much? "I mean, it's snowing and maybe driving it's hard-"

"I'll stay. That's all?" 

Alex nodded. 

"Good. Now where was I? So I walk into the room and David-" 

The brunette continued listening for a whole hour. When the conversation reached an end, Henry figured it would be better to let Alex rest. So he gladly followed Alex upstairs to show him the guest room. 

The moment the door closed behind Alex and Henry and David stayed in the room alone, the blonde felt the loneliness sink in again. Today was a miracle. Honestly, he expected to be kicked out. 

He waited until he heard the bedroom door click and then he relaxed. Alex was on their bedroom, maybe they weren't in the same one but he was safe. And he smiled and laughed. And he didn't spend Christmas alone. 

Henry sank on the unknown bed, David settling at the edge, satisfied. 

And Henry felt calmer for the first time in weeks. 

Alex went to bed relaxed. Completely and blissfully relaxed. And no nightmares came to him. He might drifted on and off to sleep a couple times, but he was relaxed. 

The first time he woke up was an hour later. He observed the chair next to the bed, the clock on the bedside table, the empty space next to him, and went back to sleep. 

The second and the third time happened between thirty minutes. He observed the chair next to the bed, the clock on the bedside table, the empty space next to him and drifted off to sleep again. 

The fourth time he woke he observed the chair next to the bed, the clock on the bedside table, the two men who were inches away from his body-

His eyes widened with panic as he processed the image. One of them covered his mouth harshly with his one hand. No matter the muffled sounds and the kicks, the guy was still there, holding him down. But that wasn't the only problem. 

The other problem was a huge syringe that the second guy was keeping on his hands. Alex didn't need a doctorate to understand he was fucked. 

"Keep him down!" 

"No one can hear him anyway." The first man held him by the neck with his other hand. 

"It doesn't matter..." The second guy tested the syringe, oozing some liquid out before turning it on Alex. That was when the brunette started shaking with all his power. 

The thing was inches away from his waist before the man was hit in the head and landed next to Alex unconscious. The other one let Alex go in his attempt to save himself from the same fate but he was bit on the calf by David. 

David? 

"Get. The. Fuck. OFF. Him!" Henry punched him on the face and Alex, mid shock could swear he heard his nose cracking. The one guy had passed out next to him while the other was dragged away by Henry, continuing to punch him or kick him mid sentence. 

Alex only came to his senses a moment later when David was licking his face comfortingly. The only sound in the room was Henry's heavy breathing and the guy's groans as more punches landed on his face.

"Who gave you the fucking right,huh?" Henry screamed, knuckles bloody, but still punching. That's when it hit Alex. 

"Henry? Henry!" He couldn't let him kill him. He rushed next to the prince, trying to restrain him. The guy was down, he was half conscious, he couldn't hurt them anymore. 

"Henry, stop! Stop!" That's when he got hold of his arms. That's when Henry got back to his senses and got off the man. 

"Are you alright?" 

"I am. I am now." Alex landed his tired head on his shoulder and Henry's heart skipped a bit. He had many questions. 

First of all, where were the bodyguards? 

Second of all, who were these guys? 

"We can't leave them like this. I'll bring some tape or something. Can you call the police while I tie them up?" Henry asked, immediately getting Alex out of the room. 

"I'll- It's in the office." 

Alex was downstairs with David when Henry was done tying them up. That wasn't the worst part. The worst part was when Henry found the needle, dropped next to the bed. He wanted to kick their butts again, hurt them cause how dare they hurt Alex, how dare they try and kill him, but the next second the police was there and the two guys were out of his reach. 

"Do you recognize these men, Mr Claremont Diaz?" 

Alex shook his head no as he accepted the water Henry brought him. 

"It appears that these two guys were the guards that had the night shift out of your house, sir. They introduced themselves as the new guards but in reality,the real ones were found just a while ago, unconscious at the back of their van."

"So they pretended to be them? And why did they come in? I wasn't alone today. If they came yesterday..."

Henry shivered. Thank God he was here today. Thank God Alex allowed him to stay. 

"Most probably they expected you to be alone. Otherwise they would be more prepared." The officer stood up. "I'll leave you to rest. There are two police cars outside and we got a call from Ms Bankston. There are secret agents on their way." 

Alex nodded. He didn't want anyone. But he wouldn't cause a scene now. Not when his head was throbbing like crazy. 

"Do you want to sleep a bit? I can wait for the agents." Henry escorted the policemen out and returned back to the living room. 

"I don't think I can anymore." Alex winced when a pain shot through his head. "And I have to call my mom." 

"I can call her." He offered. "Come on. Lay down. Just for a while." 

Alex hesitated but did as he was told. He still hadn't processed the fact that if Henry wasn't there... 

Henry left the room to speak on his phone. Last thing he wanted was to stress Alex more. 

"Henry? How are you? How's Alex?"

"We're fine now. All fine. He did me the favor to try and sleep again."

"Okay. Good. We're on our way, okay? Oscar is here with us."

"Son..." Oscar's voice was heard. "How's Alex?"

"He's safe. And terrified."

"What's important is that you are both safe. We are going to the airport, okay?" 

Two more voices were heard on the other side, June's and Nora's, probably shocked as well, given the tone. And then they hanged up. 

"God, my head is killing me." Alex was laying on his side, making no attempt to acknowledge Henry as he kneeled down next to the couch. Instead, he was rubbing two fingers to his forehead, trying to soothe the feeling. 

"Does it hurt?"

"I'll manage." Alex kept his eyes closed, keeping the pace. 

"May I?" Henry gently removed Alex's fingers and repeated the motion with his own. Alex groaned at the feeling. 

"Jesus, that feels nice." 

"Thank you." Henry kept massaging his scalp with the same gentle movements. 

"When did you learn that?" 

Henry smiled. "Do you remember the important person I talked to you about?"

Alex hummed, eyes still closed. 

"He used to get terrible headaches every time he studied hours without a break."

He? So the person is a he? 

"And you did that?"

"Every time he'd let me, yes." 

"Why wouldn't he let you?"

"Well, sometimes...you don't want to be touched at that state. And it's understandable."

"Well his loss then..." Alex settled better on the couch, grinning. Henry got advantage of his closed eyes to shoot a warm smile. Then the next second Alex's eyes opened slightly and Henry dropped it as naturally as he could. 

"Thank you. For today. And don't say it's nothing or some crap. Just take my compliment." 

"Although I'm not sure it's a compliment, you're welcome."

"I'm surprised you saved me. It would have been the best excuse to get rid of me." Alex grinned and the blonde shivered. Yes, it was a joke, but knowing everything that happened the last weeks, Henry couldn't laugh. 

"You'll give me another chance, for that I'm sure." Henry pushed up a smile and continued his work. 

The next time Alex woke up slightly, was when the blonde covered him with a blanket, tucking him in just the way he wanted. 

"You'll thank me in the morning." Henry whispered before Alex closed his eyes again. 

Chapter Text

Alex was more than happy to admit that not only he slept four whole hours completely undisturbed, but also that he was well rested the next morning. Of course the thoughts of the break in flooded his awake state immediately, but he could live with that. 

Henry was at the kitchen making breakfast when Alex woke (and more or less he had made a mental note to feed Alex as much as he wasn't fed the last days). The breakfast was tasty, Henry put his whole charm in it and Alex could almost start wondering how Henry knew 𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘭𝘺 what he liked to eat when his mother, his father, Leo, June, Nora, followed by Zahra and Shaan, got inside the house, startling them both. 

"Maybe we should have knocked."

"Yeah, no shit..." Alex rubbed his chest before moving to hug his family. 

"Hello Henry."

The blonde smiled. "Hey..."

"How are you, sugar?" 

"How come you all came here?" Alex asked, still on his father's hug. 

"We were discreet. The press knew already that Ellen had to travel to New York in the 26th but no one said what time." Zahra was the first one to sit down on the island, Ellen joining her and then Leo. 

"I will attend a Christmas performance at an orphanage. But the girls will return this evening."

"Why do I feel I know where this goes..." Alex sat on the other side of the kitchen island, alone. 

"Alex... At first we all thought it was a robbery. There were a few money and jewelry missing. But now? This is not a coincidence. These people came in here to kill you. Not for money!" 

Henry lowered his head. The police had sent him a copy of the robbery file to list the things he remembered having and no longer being there, but he never filled it. Not specifically at least. How could he search the home to see what was missing when Alex was fighting for his life? 

"Alex you are in danger. We are not here to discuss this--"

"I thought you were."

"No, we are not." Zahra said. "For a few days it's better to return at the White House."

"Sorry but..." His eyes fell on Shaan then on Henry. "I'm sorry guys, it's not like I don't trust you but...really? No NDA needed to hear this?" 

"It won't be needed." Ellen nodded to Zahra to go on. "Henry has already signed one when you did after the...cake accident. And Shaan is my husband."

Alex was moving his head back and forth to process everything. "I thought he was Henry's security guard." 

"He can be both." 

He looked over at Shaan who nodded with agreement. 

A second of silence. Then a few more. 

Alex snorted with a fake laugh as he stood up. "I can't fucking believe you!" 

"Alex wait! What changes, mijo?"

"What changes, dad, is this! All the little fucking things you hide from me."

"The doctors said--"

"It will slow down my progress, I know... Cause God forbid I learn about Zahra's wedding! It will have a huge impact on my life!"

"Mijo--" 

"You don't tell me anything! What am I supposed to think, huh? That we stopped talking to each other and when you heard of the accident y'all came back? And have no fucking clue what happened in my life the last four years cause you weren't there?" 

"Alex just stop and fucking listen!" 

Shaan walked out of the room, assuming they need space anyway. 

"What's next? The White House is blue now?" 

"Alex you're coming with us and that's final." 

"Will you tell me everything? Everything I did on these four years?" 

Everyone looked at each other. And behind Alex, rested against the sink, Henry buried his nails on his palms. This fight was his fault, even if Alex didn't know it. He was hiding the biggest thing from him. He should be held accountable, not them. 

"Come back to take me when you do." Alex stormed out, followed quickly by Nora. 

"This went better than we expected..."

"Are you kidding me? There is a fine line between good and bad and this was so far in the bad, that the line is a dot." Zahra said. 

"I can't help but feel responsible for this. I was supposed to be the center of the fight. You did nothing wrong."

"Neither did you, Henry."

"You hide this from him for my sake."

"You don't owe us a thing." Ellen stood up to go next to him. "Maybe Alex is tough to handle right now. But thank you for being here. I don't know what would happen if..." 

Henry rubbed her hand that was settled on his shoulder. And his phone rang. 

"I'm sorry, it's...my brother."

"He's probably upset. The news must have reached him already."

"No, he just calls to tell me it's dangerous and wants me to return. He has called twice by now. Anyway..." He closed it. "Alex is just terrified. He's not hard to handle. I don't know how I would take it. Losing my memories and feeling like I have so much to catch up to."

"Fire under his ass." June commented. 

"It's good that he still trusts someone. Even if he doesn't trust us." 

Meanwhile, upstairs, Alex stopped running away and told Nora to shut the office door closed. 

"What is it? No more running?" 

"I'll tell you something, but you won't freak out, okay?" 

"Tell me you remembered!" Her eyes lit up. 

"What? Fuck no... Focus a bit. I wanted to call you and speak with you and June about it but I didn't know if you wanted to listen to me--"

"Cause you kicked us out? No shit, Sherlock."

"About that... Sorry."

"Payback after you remember again." Nora joked. Alex didn't have the heart to tell her he might never do. "Now you have a boo boo head and I can't be mad."

"Fuck off." The girl laughed. "Anyway, back to the problem."

"Which is?"

"Promise not to laugh?" 

"Just spill it."

"I think... I just think, I'm not sure yet. Of course there are a lot to learn and research but--"

"For fuck's sake!"

"I might be bisexual!" 

Nora raised her eyebrow. "You might?"

"I...I don't know. What do you think?"

"I'm not the one to tell you if you are, Alex... What made you think so? Or better...who?" 

"Well... I got to the shelter Henry has with--"

"So it was Henry!" Nora calmed down a bit. Not that she didn't like where this was going but she was making it quite obvious with her joy. 

"What? No, no! Henry is a friend. 𝘑𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥. I can't believe I said the words Henry and friend on the same sentence. And out loud.I just got to search a few things at the shelter and...about LGBT youth in their pamphlets and... Promise not to laugh again?"

Nora just gave him a look. 

"I had a roommate, named Liam. Of course you know Liam, but... It had never occurred to me before but... I don't think we were just friends."

Nora slowly nodded. 

"I wanted to call him and ask him, but half of the numbers were deleted from my phone, so I tried to call him from memory."

Nora's eyes widened. 

"His boyfriend picked up. It was... enlightening."

"What did he tell you?"

"Nothing, I just hung up. I don't know what to do. Honestly,I thought I had a girlfriend that you were hiding from me, but maybe...I was bi the whole time and dated,I don't know, a dude. And never told you! Does this makes sense?"

Nora nodded no. "I got used to our conversations being like this. No worries."

"What do you think?" 

"Jesus, Alex...I'm not the one to tell you if you're bisexual. And again, what started this?" 

"I told you--"

"Not this! How did it get in your mind? What made your thoughts spiral?"

"I...Promise not to--"

"If you don't spit it out already--"

"I had a dream."

"What...kind of dream?" 

"I was in this house with someone. But it wasn't one of you. I could see the figure, but not clearly, you know? And I tried to imagine someone..."

"And..."

"I'm not gonna say more." Yes, he trusted Nora with his whole heart. But making her thinking Alex was a weird pervert...not today. 

"I'll fucking slap you--"

Someone knocked at the door and both of them closed their mouths. Ellen, Oscar and Henry came in. 

"We understand that you changed your mind about Washington. But we cannot leave you here alone."

"So you'll take me back against my will?" 

"No. Henry had a better idea." 

Henry coughed. "I was thinking...since you can't stay here but need a place to stay anyway, somewhere guarded--"

"Just spit it out, Wales." 

"Why don't you come to Pez's house? I live alone there for now and I'm sure he won't mind. He went back to Britain." 

Alex's jaw has hanging by now. 

"What do you say?" 

Not that Henry was...totally awful. But seeing him every once in a while or texting him randomly it's not the same as living alone, TOGETHER, under the same roof. 

"Alex?"

"O-okay...good. Th-thanks man." 

"So you are saying yes?" 

Alex looked at everyone in the room. 

"Why not?..yes." 

Alex settled really well from the very first hours. His bedroom was next door with Henry's, David was actually really pleasant to be around and Pez as Henry said, didn't mind in the slightest. 

June and Nora left after lunchtime, Oscar and Ellen left an hour before her speech. But the coldness they had towards Alex made a knot on his stomach. 

"Do you think they're mad?" Alex asked Henry a good twenty minutes into a Bake Off episode. Henry raised his head from his hands. 

"Huh?"

"Mad. My parents. That I didn't follow them back." 

"Maybe a little hurt. But not mad." 

"We all know that's worse." Alex tried to light up the mood. "I just...nothing, drop it."

"What?" 

"It's nothing."

"Now I'm invested." Henry lowered the TV volume. "Say it." 

"I wasn't...too good of a son. The last time we spoke. I mean, I fought with my mom on the phone cause she arranged a whole magazine issue about the accident and when my dad called afterwards, I never picked up." Alex lowered his head. "Be honest. Say, Alex you fucked up." 

"I don't think you fucked up."

"Okay, you're either too polite or too dumb to say that." 

"Or just honest." 

"Highly unlikely."

"Will you settle if I admit I'm all three?" 

Alex smiled. "Okay..." 

Henry waited a moment before responding. 

"Actually I think your parents have forgiven you."

"I never told them I'm sorry. I told Nora and June before they left but not them!"

"I think they know you didn't mean it."

"No they don't."

"How are you so sure--"

"Cause all I've done the last days is act like a whiny bitch!" He snapped. "And although I promised myself not to do that, not to whine, cause it's not people's fault my head got smashed, I can't help it..." 

Henry winced. He really didn't know what to say. Alex probably didn't expect him to respond, cause his vision got back on TV. 

"What you are going through... I can't imagine it, Alex. And I'm sorry for your aching. I don't think anyone can fully understand you. Not without walking in your shoes."

Alex sighed. "June once told me I have a fire under my ass for no good reason. But that was me, and everyone, including me, could live with that. With me, rushing to get to the next thing, going from one to another, to accomplish everything I can as if someone chases me. And it's like I went to bed...and the next day I woke up in a world when I'm suddenly settled, but with nothing I wished for, back in 2019. And everyone is trying to convince me these are the correct choices, but I don't...I don't see anything correct about them. Anything that makes then stand out. It's just a normal house, in a normal city, and a normal degree. The 2019 Alex had dreams, had a house with his family. The new Alex ended up alone. That's why I didn't want to go to D.C. I couldn't stand the thought of watching any change in our old house. I want to keep my memories as they were. Intact. The last thing that connects me with my past." Alex sniffed but pushed up a smile. "You must think I'm nuts by now."

"No...thank you for sharing this. I know it's hard and--"

"Have you considered being a psychologist? You're a good listener."

"Perks of being a spare in a royal family. You don't talk much." 

"Ouch... From the way you spoke about them yesterday I thought--"

"They were sugar, spice and everything nice? Yeah, not always like that..."

"How did they take it then? You being gay." 

"Mom was always supportive. Bea as well. I guess both of them knew I was gay even before I told them. I'd like to think dad knew as well." Henry smiled. "So they were on my side. Gran and Philip try to be supportive lately." 

"That's why you decided to live in America?" 

"Well, it's not that bad. Not when you have something--"

"--To make it special?" Henry nodded yes. "I knew it. It's what they say. It's not the place, it's the people and the memories." 

"I agree with that."

"So you can understand me! Imagine waking up with amnesia, with you thinking you're back in 2019. How many things have changed for you since then? You moved here, you came out, you have shelters, a whole foundation with your best friend and...God knows what more! Wouldn't all that memories be a shame to get lost? Wouldn't you feel empty without the spark that made these last years special?"

Henry just nodded sadly before meeting his eyes. "I'm afraid I lost it, Alex. I lost my spark." 

"Do you wanna talk about it?" 

"Why don't you...phone your parents? And maybe talk another time."

Alex sighed. "Okay. But Henry, you can speak to me you know. We are...friends now." 

"We are?" 

"Are we not?" 

Henry shook his head. "No, no...you're right. We are. Just surprised."

Alex smirked. "Thought so." And stood up. "I will be back in ten." 

Henry heard the door of the living room shut and then Alex's voice. 

"Dad? Hey...No, no, everything is fine, I promise. That's not the reason I called." 

"For real, a book club?"

"Alex..." Henry sighed while getting out of the house, followed by the brunette. "For the hundredth time yes. Are you sure you want to come?"

Over the last four days, Henry managed to check food out of the list of things he has to worry about Alex. Next one was communication with the outside world. And since the only outside world Henry knew the last month was the shelter, he decided to invite Alex to everything he had organized. 

Including a book club Alex made him fun of. 

"Of course I'll come. The kids there are amazing. And the owner."

Henry turned around dumbfounded. What did he just say? 

"And the other owner is...average." 

"Oh fuck off." Henry got into the car first and then Alex as well, laughing out loud. 

"We will be back at eight. If you wish to... spend New Year's Eve elsewhere." 

Truth be told, his sister suggested a party but he immediately declined. Just the thought of so many unknown people next to him, took him back to the night of his assassination attempt. He didn't want to spend the night looking for guns, poison or needles. 

His therapist said it was normal to feel whatever Alex was feeling. Alex wasn't so sure but he cancelled anyway. 

Maybe Henry was also invited and wanted to go. But wouldn't he already be there? Or maybe he would go back to London. 

But then again, he would spend New Year's Eve in an airplane if he didn't leave immediately... 

"Where will you spend New Year's?"

"I...I haven't planned anything really. Not apart from the book club."

"So that means you'll be home?" 

"If by home you mean Pez's, that's my plan...you?"

"I...can stay. With you."

"Really?"

"Yeah. We had an okayish Christmas together."

"Dick."

"Will you do me the honour of spending an okayish New Year's Eve together?" Alex asked in a fake voice and Henry pushed him lightly. 

"I hate you." 

"No you don't." 

"Well don't be so sure about it..." 

"If you did, you'd let them kill me. If anything you like me." Alex grinned. 

Henry's smile dropped. "Don't say that." 

"What? About you liking me--"

"About your death part you idiot!" Henry said a bit louder than he meant to and Alex stopped. Actually, for the rest of the ride, they didn't speak, only the car's noises breaking the silence. 

When Alex got inside the shelter, he felt better. 

Well he wouldn't call what him and Henry just did a fight. But Henry had the same sense of humor as Alex to everything, that's what he figured. So why did Alex's joke hurt him? It was not his fault. Whatever might had happened that night wasn't his fault. 

"Hello!" Henry smiled the moment he walked in the special library he had prepared for the book club. Alex followed him a second later. 

Around fifteen teens were sitting in comfortable plushy chairs in a circle and they all dropped their conversations when they entered, focusing on the men. After a brief discussion (and Alex internally checking if he can remember everyone's names), Henry cleared his throat. 

"So..." Henry took a seat among the children, Alex also taking a seat somewhere not that far, between Bradley and a girl named Maria. 

"We have Alex with us today." Some of them smiled. "So just to clarify this for our newcomer, this is our book club. We meet once every two weeks and we discuss about books we read in the meantime and things that made us laugh or cry or really touched us. It can be a quote, it can be anything. It doesn't matter if we don't agree sometimes. It's always done with respect."

"Yeah, about that... The only thing I read that week was my doctor's subscription." 

Some muffled laughs were heard.

"It doesn't matter. You are excused. So... Since it's Christmas this is a special meeting. We have special meetings in Christmas and Hanukkah. Also Easter, for those who celebrate, and also Summer."

"So basically every time." Another girl commented and everyone laughed. 

"Thank you, Lucia." Henry chuckled. "Every time that's a special meeting, we plan and we all read the same book that one of us recommends each time."

"Whose turn is it now?"

"There...was a lottery. And I got picked." Henry cleared his throat. "Although I don't know how fair it was, there has been a rumor going on in here that I don't know how to read." 

"Alex, what would you think if someone kept mentioning Pride and Prejudice in every meeting, huh?" 

-𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘗𝘳𝘦𝘫𝘶𝘥𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯? 

-𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭. 

"I..." Alex tried to fight the dialogue (was it a memory?) that was created on his mind. "I don't want to spark any new rumors, but I haven't seen him read anything lately." 

Some of the kids made teasing noises at Henry, or even grinned playfully. 

"Alright, alright...So, two weeks back we had a meeting and I couldn't be here but I purchased fifteen copies just to be sure and mailed them here. Did you all read your copy?" 

Some nodded, others replied. Alex looked at the book Bradley was holding. 

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘚𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧 𝘈𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘴. 

Perfect. Another book Alex hadn't read. 

"Alright. Then I start, I guess." Henry smiled. "The book I recommended today was 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧 𝘈𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘴. Speaking for me, as the only closeted gay kid at a bloody palace, I went through the Greek mythology phase. I 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 go through it sometimes." He joked. "Had anyone know about the story before reading it? Like from the Iliad, maybe?"

No one raised their hands. 

"It's alright. Even better. You weren't spoiled about the ending--" 

"I knew the story." A voice made everyone turn. Alex hesitantly raised his hand. 

"The...the Achilles story?" Henry asked and the brunette nodded. 

"Why the tone of surprise?" 

"I just...didn't expect it." For real he didn't expect it. Alex had never mentioned it. 

"I'm not the one with the rumor that can't read!" Alex sighed. "Achilles was supposed to be the best of the Greeks. He was indestructible everywhere but his heel, hence the phrase Achilles' heel."

"Our weakest point." Henry muttered. 

"Exactly. Impressed enough, Wales?" Alex laid back to his chair completely, grinning. "Wait to hear what I know about my namesake, Alexander Hamilton." 

Henry cleared his throat. "Later. Anyway, Achilles is not the narrator of this story. Patroclus is. I assume you know about him too?" 

"Well, you can't hear about the one without the other, am I right? I'm not a historian. I can speak freely." 

Some of the kids chuckled and whispered something like 𝘴𝘦𝘹𝘶𝘢𝘭 𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯 and 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘨𝘢𝘺. At least what Alex could hear. 

"Enlighten me though. Why Song of Achilles? And not Song of Patroclus? And why song in the first place?" 

"Basically..." Maria raised her hand. "In this book we see a human side of Achilles through the eyes of his lover. So a side we haven't seen before cause obviously the only thing historians care about is his fighting talent." Some of the kids made thumbs up at that or even clapped. 

"You explained it better than I would. So, I assume you liked the book?"

All of them (like fucking all of them) nodded.

"Who wants to begin? They can tell us anything." 

A boy named Michael raised his hand. "Okay, so... At first, I didn't get what all the fuss was about. But after I finished it in a day,I'm pretty sure I got it now. I liked how the story went. And I liked the way they expressed their love without a single I love you." 

"Favourite phrase?" 

"I'd say... Name one hero who was happy."

"Really nice." Henry smiled sadly. 

The whole session went somehow like that. One would speak, maybe someone would comment, dialogue would be created and Alex stood shocked in front of kids who found interests in the same subjects as him, who wanted to work hard and make this world a better place. Who somehow found Henry, that idiot with the huge heart and started a book club. 

Did he just admit Henry had a huge heart? 

"I think we're already running late and Pez will kill me if I mess his shelter plans for New Year's Eve so--"

"What about you?" Alex zoned in. "Favorite thing about the book?" 

"It will sound cliche...But I feel like there is a person for every one of us, our soulmate, our better half, a person that nested in our heart and stayed there. So the quote I will say..." His eyes fell on Alex. "He is half of my soul." And then his eyes wandered on the others. "So speaking as a not much older fellow, if you are lucky enough to find the person that speaks to your soul, your one and great love... Don't make the same mistake as them. Don't let them go." His eyes started glistening but pushed up a smile. "I hope you have a great New Year's Eve. Pez has a lot of things planned. Till next time I'll say." 

As the kids said their goodbyes to Henry and picked up their books, the blonde's phone started ringing and got out to speak. 

"Did you like the club, Alex?" Maria asked. 

"Yeah, it was...really awesome. Glad you're having fun." 

"Hope you'll come again."

"Next time I'll be more prepared." He smiled. "And...one more thing. Does...Henry actually created this?"

"And not just that. He has created many things. He just takes great pride at the book club." 

"Cool. Is he always so sappy?" Alex joked and Maria laughed. 

"Most of the times. I can't blame him, he's the romantic type." 

Alright, Alex. Fishing time. 

"At least I hope he...will found it. His one true love." 

Maria stopped moving completely and turned to him. "I...believe he has found it, Alex."

Was this his heart beating fast? Why did this feel like...heartbreak? 

Why did he care in the first place? This was so embarrassing to begin with. Of fucking course Henry would find someone to love. He is a prince for fuck's sake. He could yawn and people would fall on their knees for him. 

"Sorry, I had to take this. Everything alright in here?" Henry walked in again. 

"Of course. I have to go now. See you." 

"Yeah... Have a great night Maria!" Alex smiled charmingly before following Henry out again. 

"Cash is waiting around the corner." Henry told him the moment they stepped out of the building. "I hope you didn't get very bored."

"What? No, it was fine. Actually...the last times I visited this place...I realized why I wanted to study law at the first place." 

"You did?"

"Yeah. It just...clicked, you know? It was in front of my eyes and couldn't see it. And if for me to remember I have to endure listening to you for a few hours--"

"Now you're just being a dick!"

"I'd say that I'd happily do it!"

"Doesn't matter. Still a dick!" 

"Asshole."

"I'm not going to respond." Henry smiled. "But if you liked it, I can lend you the book." 

"Nah, now I know how the story goes." 

"So what? Because the story didn't end happily it was never enjoyable?" 

"No, I didn't- I just had enough drama the last weeks. I need...something that will end happily." 

"How about something that doesn't end at all?"

Alex smirked. "You really are the romantic type, right?" 

"I wouldn't deny it exactly... are you not?" 

"Not a Song of Achilles type for sure. A more Shakespearean one."

"First of all, how can you know if you've never read it? Secondly, Shakespearean? And you try to avoid drama?" 

"Oh fuck off..." Alex made an attempt to laugh. "Can I tell you something and promise not to laugh?" 

Henry nodded. 

"After they told me that I...I had amnesia -like not after, after, it took me a few hours to process it- anyway, after I returned home, I was so sure I would find someone waiting for me."

The blonde tried to look undisturbed. "Really?"

"I mean, there were pictures missing from the wall and there were furniture that I wouldn't buy but got used to them anyway and the house was so practical that I kept thinking... There is no way I'm living here alone. There is no way I picked this house and I'm fucking living here at all!"

Henry could only nod. 

"I was sure everyone was lying. My mom, June, Nora... No matter the explanations they found for everything I nagged about, I would get suspicious of something else."

"Well, are you convinced now at least?"

Alex sighed but nodded. 

"I really wished my suspicions were true though. It would make fucking sense! I leave the White House, Washington, politics and I go to New York and for what? I must have had someone to share my new life. A roommate if not a girlfr- if not a soulmate. Then it would make sense. Shakespearean." 

Henry coughed gently. "I know that many things might not make completely sense right now... But they will, eventually."

You could stab Henry in the heart and hurt less than having to do this conversation. Than having to see Alex being amnesiac and confused and scared about the future. 

"I hate that y'all say the exact same thing. And most importantly, I hate that you're all right." Alex managed to smile. "How about you, your highness?" 

"Oh please don't start..."

"Romantic and royalty? It mustn't be that hard to date." 

"Trust me it is." 

"When is the last time you went on a date?" 

"Why don't you ask yourself these questions?"

"Cause I can't remember the answers, duh... Come on!"

"It has been...a while." 

"Weak. Me and Nora would create headlines every other day."

"Because you were impulsive. I had an image to uphold."

Also I am (or was?) dating you. 

"From what I recall, you had your fair share of dates just for the covers too. Unless one night stands are your thing--"

"Alex--"

"But then again not very romantic, is it?" 

"Why are you interested in my love life?"

"For the same reason you're interested in mine." Alex smirked. 

"That's a thing mates do here in America and I've missed it?"

"Please don't say that word in my presence again."

"What do you mean, mate?" 

"Jesus, you really are British." Alex hit his forehead and Henry just laughed. "I answered all your questions. It was only fair to ask something back." 

A car at the end of the road flashed its lights at them. Cash. Of course. 

"Cash is here. We better go..." Alex went to move but Henry simply tilted his head so it was close to the brunette's. 

"I am one who loved. Not wisely, but too well." Henry smiled and let go. "Just to answer your question." 

Alex watched as Henry made his way to the car. 

Did Henry just quote Shakespeare? 

Alex and Henry had a more than okayish New Year's Eve together. They watched Dancing with the stars, Henry even sang along while dancing a few songs, they had karaoke with songs Pez had on their playlists, they drank a bit too much and went to sleep. 

Alex was awakened three hours later from the most weird dream of them all. 

He was in the brownstone, and the house was different. It was all white and empty and a small radio was playing something. 

𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘪𝘴. 

𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘎𝘰𝘥, 𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘌𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩. 

And in the middle of it all, Henry was just sitting there, observing an empty wall. 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺? Alex saw the guy from afar and moved towards him. 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺, 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦? 𝘞𝘩𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘵𝘺? 

When Alex spoke, Henry made a few steps back, making a face of complete disgust. 

𝘊𝘢𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘳𝘪𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦? 

Ouch... 

Turning around, Alex watched the same men who broke into his home to take him, and he was screaming at anyone listening, and Henry was standing there undisturbed and Taylor Swift was repeating the same lyrics again and again, like a broken radio. 

The moment before the men would take Alex completely away from Henry's sight, Henry came next to them with quick steps. He caressed his face at first. Then his touch sharpened and got out a needle, keeping Alex in place at the same time. 

And Alex woke up panting. 

Couldn't his mind just...turn off for a good eight hours at least? And actually start remembering instead of scaring him and terrorizing him with the fact Henry is gay? 

Again, why does it matter? 

It doesn't. Of course it doesn't. 

And if there was a slight chance he liked him... 

No. Fuck no. 

How on earth could he hang out with Henry all these years if... 

𝘐𝘴 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨? 𝘈𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘬? 

Stop it. Please stop it. 

If he couldn't stop thinking all these then he would completely lose it. 

But then again... 

𝘐𝘴 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨? 𝘈𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘬?

Instead of trying to push these thoughts away, he actually welcomed them. 

How Henry was in the hospital, waiting to see him. 

How he left with Pez immediately when Alex was feeling tired without needing explanation. 

How he kept coming back even if Alex was a dick to him. 

How he knew what he liked to eat, when he needed to leave, when he was in danger. 

No. Fuck, no... 

𝘐𝘴 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨? 𝘈𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘬?

The voice in his bed. The one who sounded like Henry. 

The figure sitting on the chair. The figure that now that he thinks of it, looked more like a man than a woman. 

𝘋𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘢𝘮 𝘐 𝘢 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭 𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘦?

Then Henry who says Bloody Americans every time Alex does something REALLY American.

The man's underwear with the American flag. 

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢 𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘢𝘤𝘦. 

The pictures missing, the furnitures that wasn't totally his style, the empty cabinets. 

Motherfucking Star Wars. 

Alex stood up from bed, almost falling while doing so and rushing to the kitchen. He needed water. 

He reached the sink, gasping for air. 

𝘐𝘴 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨? 𝘈𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘬? 

With trembling hands he poured himself a cup of water. 

June struggling to explain to Alex their friendship level. Nora being afraid of him calling Liam. Henry staying in America. The kids knowing him in the shelter. Henry quoting Shakespeare. 

If his instinct was wrong he would change his name and flee the country. 

But if he was right? 

-𝘈 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘵 𝘪𝘯𝘫𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘥. 𝘉𝘢𝘥𝘭𝘺. 

-𝘎𝘪𝘳𝘭𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥? 

-𝘠𝘰𝘶...𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵, 𝘺𝘦𝘴. 

Fuck no... FUCK NO. 

"Alex?" He heard a voice from behind him, causing him to drop the cup as he turned around. Henry raised his hands, indicating he meant no harm. 

"I'm...so sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I just heard noises and...Is everything alright?" 

Alex kept staring at him, eyes open wide. 

"Alex? Are you feeling alright?" He approached him with concern. 

Don't scare him. Think of a plan first.

Alex could only manage a nod. 

"Are you sure? If you are not alright we can--"

"I just...had a nightmare." 

"Oh...alright. Do you need me to do anything? I know it can be...rough. First days in a new house." 

Alex just stepped away from his reach but pushed up a smile. 

"I'm...getting sleepy already. Thanks. See ya." 

When Alex left the kitchen, Henry was lost. 

What just happened? 

"Hey Pez." He left the message to the voicemail. "I was thinking what you said this morning about coming to New York. Do you think the girls would also want to come? Maybe the five of us can go for dinner or...lunch maybe." Then whispered. "It would do Alex good to have some more company. I think something is wrong..."

Chapter Text

The next morning, Henry said he needed to take care of a job and locked (not literally) himself at the office. Not that Alex got out of his room much anyway. 

The one part of his brain kept saying that this was madness. There was no fucking way His Royal Highness Prince Henry insert too many names, would have a relationship with him. At least he would have the decency to tell him. Not keeping him away from truth. 

The other part of his brain was thinking of a good plan. 

"Alex?" He heard a knock on the door which startled him. "I...have to go to the shelter for something important. It won't take long, alright?"

"O-okay..." Alex exhaled. 

"And just to know, Pez, June and Nora might come later today. They won't sit for long."

"Fine.Okay." He was convinced June left him a message to tell him but he didn't even bother replying. He had only one thing in his mind. 

Henry returned home an hour later, carrying some takeout in bags. Surprisingly, he found Alex sitting at the couch. 

"Hey...I passed by a place I heard it had great sandwiches so I brought us two." Henry left the bag at the kitchen and returned. "Is everything alright?"

Alex just smiled. "Yes. I'm not that hungry. I... wanna talk about something. If that's okay." 

Henry frowned but nodded. With two quick steps, he sat next to him. 

"It will seem weird but... I know you wouldn't lie to me. Was I...seeing someone?" 

Henry's heart skipped a beat. "N-no." But tried to joke it off. "I thought you said you believed your sister when she said you didn't."

"I do. I just wanted to double check it. I met someone." Alex lied. 

"Someone? Wh-what someone?" 

"A girl. It happened days ago, before Christmas, the day I kicked you out? Well, earlier that day, I had gone to buy a coffee and she was working there. We talked for a while and she gave me her number. I think it would be nice. Getting back to the dating game."

Henry blinked a few times. But pushed up a smile. "F-for real? I thought you would tell me sooner. Wow, I'm...happy for you." 

Henry didn't know why he was so surprised. Nothing guaranteed to him that Alex would fall back on his arms even if he remembered. He was living on borrowed time and he knew it. 

Meanwhile Alex couldn't understand if Henry was actually innocent or just a great actor. 

"I'm actually considering calling her right now. To arrange a date." 

"You won't tell me her name first? A few things about her? How do you know if she likes you for who you are?" 

"Whoa whoa, easy... First of all she's foreign. She had no idea who she was speaking to. Second of all, let her say yes and I'll tell you everything." He opened his phone and held his thumb over Henry's contact. Henry's phone was between of them in the couch. 

"Henry?"

"Yes, Alex?"

"Are you sure I'm not dating anyone?" 

Remember what the doctor said, Henry. You want Alex's well being before your own. 

Henry just nodded no. 

Fuck it. He pressed the call button. 

And Henry's phone lit up between the two. For only a quick second, the prince didn't understand a thing, but when the screen opened and Alex❤🇱🇷 appeared on screen accompanied by a picture of them with Henry kissing his forehead, he really didn't have time to do anything apart from grabbing his phone. 

Alex's deadly hand grip stopped him. But the worst was the heartbreak on his eyes. 

"Alex--"

"It was you..." His voice broke but he would not cry. Not when he was so damn angry. 

"Wh- the... The girl?"

"There is no fucking girl, Wales! God, I... Fucking, lying,piece of--!"

"Alex, listen to me! Please..."

"Why, so you can't tell more lies?" Alex shoved him and stood up. "Fuck, I can't believe it!"

"I promise, I did that for your own good. The doctor--"

"Of course! The fucking doctor! And apparently I'm surrounded by saints who keep lying to me to protect me!" Alex grabbed his jacket to get out of the house. Henry rushed behind him in the garden. 

"It was not easy! Please--"

"Then imagine how I feel! God... And I told you all that shit about trust and my fucking emotions and..." Alex scoffed, stopping and turning to see him. "And I really thought you understood..." 

"I understand, of course I do! But imagine the shock you'd feel if suddenly you'd find out we were dating!"

"So you preferred to leave me alone to figure everything out? And you what? Making guest appearances in my life? If I had kicked you out on Christmas? Can you imagine what would happen if these guys came home and you weren't--" 

"Stop it. Stop it, please..."

"Or if there was actually a girl! What would you do then? How long till you confess we dated? Till I was fucking marrying her?" 

"Just stop for a second!" Henry grabbed his wrist. 

"God, and I thought I was going mental! With all these dreams and thoughts, I thought I was going nuts!" 

"Alex, just--"

"No! No just! You and I? Done. I don't wanna fucking see your face again!" Alex freed his hand and started walking even faster. Tears were streaming down his face already. 

"Alexander, hello-- what happened?" Pez almost yelled when he saw him passing. 

"You knew, right? Of fucking course! Everyone knew!" He disappeared within minutes, without looking back. 

"Jesus..." Pez muttered under his breath before reaching Henry. He placed his hand on his shoulder and the next moment the blonde fell on his knees crying. "Easy... Haz, it's going to be alright..." 

It was not alright. 

Reaching the brownstone, Alex slammed the door behind him. 

"Alex? I thought we would come to Pez's--" June stopped when she saw her brother's face. "What happened?" 

Everything. Everything happened. 

"I...dated Henry."

It was not just that he was dating him. It was that right now, his days were filled with Henry's presence. Henry's company at Pez's house, Henry's scent, Henry's laugh, Henry's shelter. 

In fact Alex didn't know how he spent his days after he was discharged from the hospital and before he became friends with Henry. 

And finding out that he lied to him...was too much now. He had come into his life, he became someone important and then...left.

And Alex was left to deal with the memories he made with him. The kids he met, the fun he had, the Christmas ornaments they decorated... 

"Alex?" Nora and June both said when the brunette ran to the living room. He grabbed the Christmas tree and started taking the ornaments off maniacally. 

"Alex!" 

The tree fell down. But Alex continued, blinking to clear his vision. 

"Alex please!" June hugged him from behind and Nora took the tree away from his hands. 

That's when Alex let it all out. He took a quick breath... 

And sobbed. 

Alex didn't leave his bed for the remaining of the day. June and Nora stayed at the house, not that he spoke at all to tell them anything. 

Ellen tried to call. Then Oscar. He didn't pick up. Even Leo tried to call but he got no response. 

His therapist advised them to give him some space instead of forcing him to open up. No serious progress was happening anyway if Alex was forced to come. And since the brunette seemed to enjoy her company, the woman just left him a voicemail to tell him to call her to schedule a meeting when he was feeling ready, like they did every week, without mentioning she knew. 

Henry didn't call. Neither showed up. Not that Alex expected him to. 

Alex was asleep on the guest bedroom before he knew it. Just the thought of facing his own bedroom after everything, was too much. June offered to fix him something to eat but he declined. Lied that he wasn't hungry. And when he said to himself he had no more tears to shed,that was another lie. 

It was maybe around six in the morning when he woke up. Someone had unlocked his door in the meantime, cause on his bedside table there was a bottle of water, some chocolate and a huge pack of... 

Is that letters? 

Alex stood, back against the headboard and took the pack on his lap. 

𝘏𝘙𝘏 𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘎𝘦𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦 𝘌𝘥𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘑𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘍𝘰𝘹 𝘔𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘞𝘪𝘯𝘥𝘴𝘰𝘳. 

𝘛𝘰, 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘎𝘢𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘭 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻. 

Yeah... No fucking way. 

Alex opened the letter and then tore it in half before tossing it aside. Then he got the second one and did the same. Then again. And again, and again--

A small ring got out of an envelope WITH the paper accompanying it. The ring slipped and fell on Alex's lap and Alex got it with gentle fingers. 

A signet ring. Not hard to guess whose. 

But why? Why give him this and risk of Alex tossing it somewhere? 

In the pile of envelopes, he found the letter with the oldest date. 

The date of the accident. 

𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹, 

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴. 𝘐𝘯 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵, 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘐'𝘮 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸. 𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘰𝘳,𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘴𝘩 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘶𝘯𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘛𝘰 𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘢𝘴 𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘱 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘵, 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘧𝘶𝘭. 

𝘍𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘳𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘰𝘯𝘦, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘭𝘺, 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘶𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭. 

𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘺 𝘢𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘻𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘰𝘳 𝘲𝘶𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘨𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘥𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘹 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘥. 𝘏𝘦𝘤𝘬, 𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥,𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘰𝘳, 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦. 

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘧𝘧 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘳𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘺. 

𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘮𝘦. 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯, 𝘐'𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘕𝘰𝘵 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵. 

𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘱 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘢 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘣𝘺𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘱 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘯𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥. 

𝘐𝘯 𝘢 𝘵𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘨𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘺, 𝘮𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘭𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘵 𝘪𝘵. 𝘐𝘧 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵, 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘹 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘶𝘪𝘵𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘦𝘴. 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦, 𝘐'𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘐'𝘥 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘥 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘐 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘪𝘯 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥. 

𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘭𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦. 𝘎𝘶𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘢 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘭. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘐'𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘰 𝘢𝘣𝘴𝘰𝘭𝘶𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺, 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥𝘭𝘺, 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘌𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭. 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘴𝘸𝘦𝘳. 

𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥, 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦. 

𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴, 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺, 𝘢 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘭

A shiver ran through his spine.They fought? And then Henry left? 

So that day Henry wasn't there. That's why Alex was alone. 

He should have been a writer. 

But then again with a few nice words, he didn't win him over. Fuck no, not after this. 

And in fact the only reason Alex read it was because it could provide information about his life before. Not because he cared. 

Searching through the pile, he found the second letter. Next morning. 

𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹, 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦, 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘦, 

𝘐 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘐'𝘥 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘴𝘵. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵, 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥. 

𝘐'𝘮 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦, 𝘢𝘧𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘧 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘢 𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘰𝘮𝘣. 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘦𝘸𝘴. 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺 𝘣𝘦... 

𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘥. 

𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥. 𝘐 𝘶𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘪𝘻𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘹𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥. 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘮𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘮𝘢𝘨𝘯𝘪𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦, 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘮 𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘩 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴, 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘦. 

𝘐𝘧 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘦𝘭, 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘨𝘰 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵. 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘴𝘰. 𝘐𝘯 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵, 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘺, 𝘐'𝘥 𝘥𝘪𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘢𝘨𝘦, 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱, 𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 

𝘓𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘮𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘦𝘭 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸, 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐'𝘮 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦. 𝘐𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘫𝘦𝘵, 𝘐'𝘮 𝘥𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺. 𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘢𝘧𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺, 𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘤𝘳𝘰𝘴𝘴 𝘣𝘢𝘥 𝘯𝘦𝘸𝘴, 𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘰 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳. 

𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦. 𝘕𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦'𝘴. 

𝘐 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘸𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘮𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳. 𝘕𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯𝘴. 

Alex choked a laugh. But his eyes were glistening. After hearing Henry's story of his dad (for a second time) to listen Henry talking about death...his death.

He was not the only one suffering. 

But this was not his fault. And just one well -no, two well written letters- would change his mind. But he went on. 

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘨𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘣𝘢𝘥, 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘶𝘴𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦, 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩. 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘦. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸, 𝘯𝘰 𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘮 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘦𝘪𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳. 

𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐'𝘮 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦. 𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 

𝘚𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦. 𝘛𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘶𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩, 𝘨𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘔𝘠 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘩, 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵, 𝘵𝘰𝘰. 

𝘈𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴, 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴, 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺. 

So till now... 

1. He found out they fought (and probably as Henry said, Alex was right) and Henry left. But he had decided to leave before the fight? And then left anyway? 

2. He returned after the hospitalization. Probably while Zahra was planning his funeral. 

Going on, he found the next letter. A day after. 

𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹, 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭, 

𝘈𝘴 𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘮 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥, 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘴 𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘴, 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭. 

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘦. 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦, 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘵𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦. 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘥𝘥𝘭𝘦, 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸. 

𝘕𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬, 𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘶𝘭. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘴 𝘢 𝘭𝘶𝘮𝘱 𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘱𝘩𝘺𝘴𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯... 

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘤𝘵𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘢 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘦. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘭𝘭 𝘸𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘶𝘱, 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦. 

𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘩. 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥, 𝘴𝘰 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵, 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘶𝘴, 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘸𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 (𝘺𝘦𝘴, 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭. 𝘛𝘸𝘪𝘤𝘦. 𝘚𝘩𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘭𝘺). 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯, 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘤 𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘭𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯. 𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘰𝘯, 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

𝘉𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘻𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘰 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘦𝘭𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘺 𝘴𝘲𝘶𝘦𝘦𝘻𝘦. 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴, 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘸. 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘴 𝘢 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

𝘐𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴, 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘥𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 

𝘜𝘭𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴, 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺. 

Damn it, Wales. 

Of course. The prince with the perfect manners and perfect handwriting would give him these letters. And Alex was expected to do what? Open his arms for him again? 

Alex wiped two tears threatening to spill from his eyes. If the next letter wasn't helpful, he would tear the rest of them and return the ring. 

In his left hand, his fingers were still playing with it. 

Okay, here we go, he muttered before opening the next one. 

𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹, 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥, 

𝘓𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘦𝘹𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘦𝘭 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸. 

𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳, 𝘚𝘩𝘢𝘢𝘯 𝘪𝘴 𝘥𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘐 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘴... 

𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘸𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘵? 

𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘸𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘢 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘢𝘱𝘦? 

𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘐'𝘮 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧𝘪𝘴𝘩. 𝘚𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵. 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧𝘪𝘴𝘩. 

𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘐 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘦𝘥, 𝘸𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵. 𝘐 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐'𝘮 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘶𝘱𝘴𝘦𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘦𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳. 

𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘶𝘭𝘵. 𝘕𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘶𝘭𝘵. 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴, 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳. 

𝘔𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘨𝘰𝘰𝘥. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘱𝘶𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘩. 

𝘐 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯. 𝘗𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺. 

𝘞𝘩𝘰 𝘪𝘴 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺? 𝘞𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺? 𝘗𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘸. 𝘐 𝘥𝘰 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘛𝘰 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘳𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘢 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘰 𝘩𝘢𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘯 𝘺𝘦𝘵. 

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘶𝘴, 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭𝘴 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥. 𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦. 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘶𝘴. 

𝘔𝘺 𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘮𝘢 𝘰𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘱𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘸𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺. 𝘛𝘰𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘐'𝘮 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘭𝘺, 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘢𝘧𝘢𝘳, 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘢 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴. 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘬. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘧. 

𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵'𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳. 

𝘗𝘦𝘻 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘨𝘰𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘭𝘵𝘦𝘳'𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘤𝘭𝘶𝘣 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯. 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘢 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢 𝘣𝘰𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘢𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘺𝘵𝘩 𝘰𝘧 𝘈𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘱𝘩𝘳𝘢𝘴𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘬𝘦𝘱𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵, 𝘯𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵, 𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘥. 𝘐𝘵 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘱𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘯'𝘵. 𝘖𝘳 𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘦 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯'𝘵. 

𝘚𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘴𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘹𝘵 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘤𝘭𝘶𝘣, 𝘐'𝘮 𝘩𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘭𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘱𝘩𝘳𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥. 

𝘏𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘧 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭, 𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘰𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘺. 

𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘐 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘻𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘺, 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘣𝘺 𝘢𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘪𝘻𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴. 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘯𝘰𝘸. 

𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹, 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭. 𝘐 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘧𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘮 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦. 𝘕𝘰, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘧 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘵. 𝘊𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵, 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘪𝘯. 

𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴, 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘺 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺. 

𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦. 𝘐𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘐 𝘴𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦. 𝘛𝘰𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘰𝘸, 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘐 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘭𝘺 𝘦𝘹𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥, 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘩𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘭, 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘐 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘩𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘯𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘯𝘦. 

𝘈𝘵 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘦. 

𝘚𝘭𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭, 𝘮𝘺 𝘱𝘴𝘺𝘤𝘩𝘦. 

𝘓𝘰𝘷𝘦, 

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺. 

When did his eyes started hurting? Why did a part of his soul ached for a life he couldn't remember? 

If Henry loved him as much as he claimed, then why did he left? If he loved him so much, why didn't he tell him the truth? 

One last letter, he promised himself. I won't open any more. 

Grabbing the letter that had the ring, he took a deep breath. 

𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹, 

𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨? 𝘐𝘵 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘮𝘦𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘮𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘭𝘪𝘱. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘣𝘦 𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦. 

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘦, 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘵𝘰𝘮 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 

𝘚𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴, 𝘐 𝘮𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘢𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘥𝘰 𝘪𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦... 

𝘈𝘕 𝘐𝘕𝘊𝘖𝘔𝘗𝘓𝘌𝘛𝘌 𝘓𝘐𝘚𝘛. 𝘛𝘏𝘐𝘕𝘎𝘚 𝘐 𝘓𝘖𝘝𝘌 𝘈𝘉𝘖𝘜𝘛 𝘍𝘚𝘖𝘛𝘜𝘚 𝘈𝘓𝘌𝘟𝘈𝘕𝘋𝘌𝘙 𝘎𝘈𝘉𝘙𝘐𝘌𝘓 𝘊𝘓𝘈𝘙𝘌𝘔𝘖𝘕𝘛 𝘋𝘐𝘈𝘡. 

1. 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘦. 𝘕𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘴, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦. 

2. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘷𝘰𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘶𝘱 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

3. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘢 𝘴𝘶𝘣𝘫𝘦𝘤𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵. 

4. 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴, 𝘯𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵, 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵, 𝘣𝘦𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘣𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘥. 

5. 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘶𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘥𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘤𝘪𝘳𝘤𝘶𝘮𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘪𝘵. 𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘪𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘦𝘭𝘭. 

6. 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘦. 𝘌𝘴𝘱𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦. 𝘐 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘐'𝘮 𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘵. 

7. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘢 𝘴𝘵𝘶𝘣𝘣𝘰𝘳𝘯 𝘢𝘴𝘴. 

8. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘢𝘴𝘴. 

9. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘯𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘐'𝘥 𝘤𝘰𝘱𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵, 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶? 

10. 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘐 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘥𝘢𝘺. 𝘐𝘯𝘤𝘭𝘶𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘴. 

11. 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘥𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳. 𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘐 𝘩𝘶𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘰𝘳 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥, 𝘪𝘵 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘮𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵. 

12. 𝘖𝘶𝘳 𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘥𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦. 𝘋𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘱𝘰𝘶𝘵, 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘯𝘶𝘮𝘣𝘦𝘳 𝘦𝘭𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯. 

13. 𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘯𝘦𝘵 𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘯𝘦𝘤𝘬. 𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘯𝘫𝘰𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘭𝘦𝘨𝘦. 𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦 𝘐 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘈𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘺, 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘮𝘦. 

14. 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘪𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘥 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘯. 

15. 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘥𝘪𝘣𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘹𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘱𝘰𝘸𝘦𝘳. 

16. 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘦. 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘺? 

17. 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘓𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘰𝘯 𝘉𝘰𝘺 𝘣𝘺 𝘛𝘢𝘺𝘭𝘰𝘳 𝘚𝘸𝘪𝘧𝘵 (𝘈𝘕𝘋 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦). 

18. 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘦𝘦𝘱 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘶𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵. 

19. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘏 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴. 

20. 𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦, 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘦 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘐 𝘥𝘦𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘥. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦. 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘮𝘦. 

𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸. 𝘋𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘥 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐'𝘮 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘤𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘥. 𝘐 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘦 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘣𝘪𝘨𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘪𝘦𝘤𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘢𝘱𝘦𝘳, 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘳𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘳𝘵. 

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘤𝘬 𝘴𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 4 𝘢.𝘮. 17 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴 𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘪𝘭 𝘐 𝘴𝘦𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶, 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳. 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵. 𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘵 𝘮𝘺 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦. 

𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦, 

𝘏

Alex was holding that piece of paper like his life depending on it. He brought it close to his chest, trying to find Henry's comforting smell... 

There was nothing. The envelope had drowned every piece of Henry's smell and completely vanished it. 

When did things go downhill? 

When he cracked his head, he knew that. 

Cradling the opened and unopened letters close to his chest, Alex wept. 

Wept for the life he could have. Wept for the relationship they could have. 

If just they weren't doomed... 

Chapter Text

Henry didn't hear from Alex next morning. The girls tried to fish out information about whether or not he read the letters, but Alex never said anything. The letters were gone. Same with the ring. 

It was only two days later that Alex walked in a well known office. Dr. Miller was an amazing therapist. She was always considerate and never pushed him for anything, even if he was there against his will sometimes. She never judged. 

"Alex..." A woman around her thirties smiled when she saw him entering. "Good morning."

"Hey..." He pushed up a smile and went to sit on a couch across her chair. She clicked her pen, but she didn't have any notebook with her, something that Alex grew to love about their sessions. 

"I was surprised to hear from you yesterday." 

"Well, I...missed our last sessions." Alex sounded defeated, tired. 

"That's okay." She said softly. "Would you like to tell me about your week?" 

He nodded no. "I...something happened..." 

She didn't say anything so he moved on. 

"I found out I was dating someone... I had some thoughts and..." He laughed humorlessly. "Of course the whole world knew before me, so you don't have to pretend." 

"I won't." She said. "Henry, right?" 

Alex made a noise between a sob and a laugh. "Yeah..."

"How are you feeling about it?" 

"Mad."

"At him?" 

Alex didn't respond. Instead, he was looking at his feet. 

"It's okay if you don't know. Would you like to--"

"He sent me..." He got out of his bag the pile with letters. "These letters. They are his. Well, they are addressed to me so... I don't know." 

"Did you read them?" A nod. "What did you feel when you read them?" 

"I don't know..."

"Did you feel mad?"

He nodded no. "I felt love, mostly."

"Henry's love towards you?"

"Henry's love towards Alex." He looked at her eyes. "In every letter, there are...sweet words and jokes and...in one there is a list. Of things he loves about Alex." 

"So you think the person this letter concerns--"

"Doesn't exist anymore." He smiled sadly. "The other thing I felt is...jealousy."

She nodded and clicked her pen again. "Jealousy?" 

He sighed. "Somehow they, Henry and the old Alex, made it work. I don't know how, but they did. But that pair...is not the same as me and Henry now. If we were the same, we could make it work, but... I don't know..." 

"What do you think stops you?" 

"Alex from 2023 and Henry, walked together almost four years. Even as fake friends at first, somehow they turned into that!" He pointed at the letters. "But they wanted the same things, they figured some stuff out. And life... I dunno, just pushed me back to 2019. I don't have the memories the old Alex had. And probably the new Henry will search for other things now. Things I can't offer." 

"Do you think a person might change what they are looking for during their lives?"

A nod. 

"Between these letters...are there letters written to you before and after he discovered you have amnesia?"

Another nod. 

"Did you notice any difference on his writing?"

"That's the point! There were none! Even after I kicked him out he was still writing like he was worshiping the ground I walk in! And maybe he hasn't understood yet, but if I give him a chance to make things right, he will understand it."

"And if he understands it?" 

"He will leave. Me." 

"If he stays?" 

"Again, if he stays, it will be because he feels bad. But you can't stay in a relationship out of pity."

"So you are doing this for him?"

Alex looked away. His eyes were already glossy. 

"I don't want to be a burden." 

The woman didn't respond for a few seconds. But then she coughed gently. Behind her neutral expression, she felt like she hit the sensitive subject she wanted to talk about. But after all the pauses and the staring and the anger... 

Alex's thick skin cracked. 

"Alex, do you think this is how others view you, or is this how you view yourself?" 

"There you are..." June sat next to Alex. Alex had stopped the car abruptly after leaving Dr. Miller, without saying a word, in front of a church. It was only three hours after his therapist appointment that someone went searching. "I was worried, you know... You had an appointment to get your blood drawn and I find you here."

Alex smiled sadly next to her. In front, the choir kids were practicing songs with a piano, paying no attention to the last seats. 

"Alex? Do you need to tell me? Maybe it will help." 

"Since the first time I asked you if I was seeing anyone I was convinced I was..."

"I'm so sorry for keeping this. But the doctor didn't want you to experience all this immediately."

"It's okay..." 

June touched his hand from where it was resting on his lap. "Why did you come here?" 

Alex sighed. "I don't know. It just seemed... correct, you know... I don't know what to do." 

"Didn't Dr Miller help?"

"She did, a bit, but...this is honestly my last try. I haven't been a good Catholic in...quite a while so..." 

June's phone vibrated but never picked it up. 

"From your job?"

"Ehm, no, it's--"

"June. Bug... I know it is."

She exhaled. "Sorry. I'll call them back--"

"Why don't you go back in Washington? Take Nora and go?" 

"And you? We are not leaving you all alone after--" 

"Don't worry about me. I promise." 

"Alex, no. Fuck my work if something happens--" 

Alex squeezed her fingers and shushed her. At first she didn't realize what for, until she heard the song playing on the piano. 

𝘔𝘺 𝘨𝘪𝘧𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘦'𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶

𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘣𝘰𝘥𝘺

𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘨

𝘐𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘣𝘦 𝘲𝘶𝘪𝘵𝘦 𝘴𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘦

𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯′𝘵 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥

𝘐 𝘩𝘰𝘱𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥

𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘱𝘶𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 

𝘏𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶′𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 

"𝘉𝘢𝘣𝘺, 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘯..." 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘭𝘢𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘴 𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘶𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘰. 

"𝘔𝘺 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘥, 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦." 

"𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵?" 

"𝘐𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘣𝘦 𝘢 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘺 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘰𝘯 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘬𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘴." 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘤𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘦𝘳 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘵. "𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘢." 

𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘺𝘱𝘦𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦. 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘦𝘳. 

𝘐𝘵'𝘴 𝘢 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘪𝘵 𝘧𝘶𝘯𝘯𝘺, 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘥𝘦

𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘩𝘪𝘥𝘦

𝘐 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘦𝘺, 𝘣𝘶𝘵, 𝘣𝘰𝘺, 𝘪𝘧 𝘐 𝘥𝘪𝘥

𝘐'𝘥 𝘣𝘶𝘺 𝘢 𝘣𝘪𝘨 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘸𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦

𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘭𝘦𝘧𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘪𝘢𝘯𝘰 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹'𝘴 𝘸𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘵. 

"𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘺 𝘧𝘢𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘴𝘵 𝘴𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯 𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸." 

"𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶." 𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, 𝘥𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘪𝘯 𝘴𝘺𝘮𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘯𝘺.

"𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺?" 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘴𝘢𝘪𝘥 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘸𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘦. 

"𝘏𝘮𝘮?"

"𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘕𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵, 𝘰𝘬𝘢𝘺?" 

𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘭𝘦𝘥. "𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦, 𝘥𝘢𝘳𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨. 𝘏𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘢𝘳𝘺, 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦." 

"Alex?" June touched his arm. "Do you want us to go now?" 

The brunette could only imagine how he looked. But this thought -no, this memory- attacked his brain out of nowhere. His first memory. He felt himself smile. He couldn't remember anything more, and it felt more like a lucid dream, but it was something, right? 

"I have to do something. Can you take Cash and leave? I'll walk." 

Henry on the other hand didn't want to do anything. Pez offered to send him to places or meetings to keep him busy. Back then it seemed a good idea. Now that he didn't want to do them, not that much. 

He was playing a game on his computer, trying to kill time, when the door knocked. He was expecting Pez to come any minute now so he didn't even raise his eyes. 

"Hey..." When he heard that voice, Henry's heart skipped a beat. Or two. 

Next thing he knew his head was rising and there stood Alex Claremont Diaz. In the flesh. His Alex Claremont Diaz. 

"H-hi..." Henry blinked a few times to process everything. Alex was still there, standing, eyes on Henry and then back to the floor. Then back to Henry. 

"Can we...talk? Sorry, do you have time? I realized a bit too late you might be busy--"

"No, no, no..." Henry grabbed his phone, eyes leaving Alex only for a minute to text Pez. "I'm no longer busy." He let the device down and pushed a hesitant smile. "P-please, sit..." 

Alex hesitated but sat on a chair on the other side of the office. 

"I...I got your letters..." Alex got them out of his bag and on Henry's desk without looking at him. He slided the pile towards him slowly. Henry's hand stopped him midway. 

"I don't need them back." He said. "They have your name. They are yours to do whatever you want with them." 

"Okay..." Alex stopped and sighed. "I figured I owed to tell you something." 

"Alex, I know I hurt you--"

"Jesus, let me...please." Alex raised his eyes to meet his frightened blue. "Reading those letters, I felt...love. Like you were honest." 

Henry only nodded. 

"So I owe you to be honest as well. Yes, you hurt me. But more because at that point, you had become someone important. Someone I trusted. So that...stung."

Henry lowered his face. 

"I liked you, you know..." Now the blonde raised his face again. Alex would kill himself before admitting it out loud but Henry had poured his heart into so many letters that Alex confession felt like a water drop. "That's what got me thinking. If spending some days with Henry makes me feel that way, how come I've been friends with him for so long? So...the lies plus...having to figure it all out by myself again, that's what fucked me up the most." 

"I understand." Henry blinked a few times fast. 

"But...still I treated you like shit before leaving and that was really insensitive. This mustn't have been easy for you too and... I'm sorry for that."

Henry had braced himself for the hard goodbye two days now. This wasn't any easier. 

"It took me so long to come...well, mostly cause I'd start yelling again and I had to make sure this wouldn't happen. But still I understand what we had was something important and I have to think of the future."

Henry would look at him the whole time if tears weren't threatening to spill. Now he was only looking at his own hands in front of him. Then another hand, encircling his wrist. 

"I'd like to give us a chance. And see how it goes." 

Henry had to hear the phrase a million times over to process it. He eventually met Alex's eyes, who pushed up a hesitant smile. 

"I mean...if you want to." He continued. 

Henry's eyes were now burning and his mouth was probably hanging. 

"Y-yes..." He started nodding frantically. "Of course--"

"But I have two rules!" Alex pulled his hand back as if he remembered. "Rule one. No more secrets." Henry nodded. "And rule number two. If you feel like you can't take it, we stop. There's no need to pretend or make it work if we can't." 

Henry smiled softly. "Okay." And let a tear slip freely. A tear of joy. 

"I brought you your ring." Alex got the signet ring out of his pocket while putting the letters back to his bag. "I figured you'd want it--"

"It's yours. You wore it before."

"Yeah, I read it, but it was originally yours. Let's see if we fit first. Maybe you'd like to keep it."

"I'm sick of wearing it. Keep it, if you like." 

"But if we don't..?" 𝘍𝘪𝘵. "Maybe you'd like to--"

Henry exhaled. "I already had an epic love story. I don't want to be greedy. Even if...things don't work out between us, I want you to have it." 

Alex returned the ring back to his pocket and smiled. Smiled with an Alex Claremont Diaz smile. "Okay. So...are you free today evening?"

"I will be."

"Good. Let's go for food."

"I'm...free now, if you'd like..."

"Yeah, but...I have to go get my blood tested." He admitted. "They told me to come by today morning whenever I felt like, but I wanted us to talk first."

"I can come with you." He offered. Blood exams were never Alex's favourite thing. 

"It will be boring."

"I'm not a toddler. I can handle." 

"I nag sometimes."

Henry gave him a look that made Alex laugh. 

"And...I suppose you know already..." 

"Of course I do."

"Tell me this, did you use to go with Alex for exams?"

"All the time." Henry smiled as he put on his coat. "We wouldn't eat in the morning and we would go to his favourite place after."

Alex considered it briefly. "Can you take me there afterwards?"

Henry smiled before opening the door for him. "Of course I can, Alex."

Chapter Text

Alex did go for his blood test and then afterwards Henry took him to Alex's favourite patisserie. They had crepes, which Alex described as fucking delicious and then Henry walked him home.

"So he ate?" Ellen had called him after they parted ways. 

"Yes, I promise. His whole plate." 

"Thank God... I was almost-- it's nothing, thank you, Henry." 

It wasn't hard to sense what she wanted to say. After the accident, Alex barely took care of himself until Henry came along. And after Alex found out the truth, she was afraid about him closing back to himself and ending up depressed. But Henry had that effect. You cannot magically make someone happy. But you can try to stay with them through the storm. 

"I still don't understand why exactly you need us to leave!" June was following Alex, who couldn't seem to relax. 

"Can't you see he has plans with Henry?" Nora barely looked at them from the couch nearby. "He is a big boy. He doesn't need us anymore."

"First of all...Rude. Second of all, it's not a big deal!"

"Of course it is! Look at you being all responsible all of a sudden!"

Alex turned to his sister for help who just shrugged. 

"Seriously? No support? When have I ever been not responsible?" 

"Do you want me to answer that?"

The next moment the doorbell rang and Alex froze for a quick moment. 

"Alright, enough questions! Out!" 

"Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz, you can't kick us out!" 

"Didn't you two have a theatre night planned?" 

"Yes, but this is more interesting." June laughed at Nora's comment as she made an effort to make her stand. 

"Come on...If things go south, Alex will start nagging. Do you want to be here when that happens?" 

Nora blinked. "I'll go grab my purse really quick." 

Henry barely had time to say hi to the girls before he was brought inside and the girls were out of the door. Alex immediately sighed, closing the door behind him. 

And Henry was all dressed up. All perfect. 

"I...you said the place would be a surprise so I figured I'd better be prepared for the most strict dress code." Henry smiled. Not like the photos of him smiling. That was another kind of smile. 

Truth be told, Alex usually loved the idea of getting out and going on all types of places. And he figured he could do it today again. But just the idea of him, being surrounded by so many people, especially after the assassination attempt, 𝘱𝘭𝘶𝘴 having all eyes on them, speculating if they still have a relationship or not, was enough to make him agoraphobic. 

"Will you be really disappointed if by surprise I meant staying home?" 

Henry's gaze softened. "Only if you'll be really disappointed if I lose some layers of this." He pointed at his outfit. 

"I can live with that. Help yourself." Alex got his phone out while moving to the living room. "What do you want to order?" 

"I...don't mind. Whatever you want--"

"Okay, better..." He sat next to him,leaving the phone behind. "I want us to talk." 

For a moment Henry's heart stopped beating. Then Alex's hand was on his. 

"It's...not bad. I just have a few questions." 

Henry exhaled. "Alright...I can answer them." 

"Okay..." Alex got a small notebook out of his pocket. "I didn't want to forget anything so I wrote them down...You mentioned something about some emails." 

Henry closed his eyes. "Of course... These emails were from our private conversations. And they were leaked before the election." 

"Private? By, ehm- by private?"

"Things only meant for each other's eyes."

Alex's eyes widened with panic. "Like there were pictures, or--?"

"No, no! Don't worry about that. Just...our thoughts. And basically our whole process of dating. How we went from the complicated phase before to...having a romantic relationship." 

The brunette nodded. And for a second they stayed silent. 

"How did you feel about that?" Alex lightly squeezed his hand. 

"I got past it... How do you feel?" 

"It's complicated... But I want to read them." 

"I can... I can make a copy and bring them over next time."

Alex nodded. "Good..." Henry stroked his hand with his thumb. "Now of course I have more questions..."

"Go ahead."

"The underwear with the American flag was yours?" 

Henry struggled to stop his laughter escaping his lips. "Yes... I was the one who fixed my suitcases but there were items that needed sorting out and someone else did that. Hence the ehm...underwear staying with you. But to my defense it was 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 present! And it was supposed to be a joke."

"My joke made me think Alex had become a weird, patriotic guy so..." Alex joked. "That's why I got left with so little stuff? They thought everything was yours?"

"Long story short, yes. Also anything queer related had to leave." 

"Queer related?"

"A T-shirt with a phrase you wrote in an email, you will understand better when you read them, photos of us, our mugs..."

That's why Alex got left with a mug from his mother's campaign and a Star Wars one he didn't remember buying? 

"Wait, wait! We had mugs that were deemed queer related? Now I'm invested."

"We had a lot of them. I was drinking my tea in an LGBTea one that had replaced the letter T with--"

"Tea like...the one you drink?"

"Yes." Henry smiled. "And you had one that said 𝘓𝘦𝘵'𝘴 𝘨𝘦𝘵 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. 𝘐'𝘮 𝘯𝘰𝘵. That was one of your favourites." 

"Do you...happen to know how I ended up with a plastic Star Wars mug?" 

"Of course. It was Valentine's Day and we had a bet. Who would make the most amazing but hideous gift to the other. That kid mug was my present." 

"What did I get you?"

Henry gave him a look. 

"No way! The fucking underwear?"

Henry only nodded before he started laughing. 

"I think I won that one." He grinned. 

"Yeah...you did." 

Alex breathed in and out for a few seconds, trying to gather the courage to go on and don't forget anything. 

"How did you call me?"

"Excuse me?"

"Did you call me Alex? Or...I dunno... something sappy?"

Henry smiled. "It really depends on the situation."

"On a daily basis?"

"On a daily basis...I would call you love, most likely."

Alex nodded, coughing slightly to hide his blush behind his hand. "And how would I call you?"

"You...were fond of the term sweetheart or... babe, maybe." Henry cleared his throat. This was already weird enough but he had promised no more secrets so he would answer anything at that point. 

"Okay...good." Alex noted something down. "Who bought the brownstone?" 

"I did."

"Okay."

"But it was for us to live in." 

"Are you okay with me being here now?"

"How would I not be?"

"That's not what I'm asking. I mean if...we don't make it...whose property is it?" 

"Well...technically I bought it... But it's not like I'm going to keep it if... It was supposed to be ours, that's what I mean." 

"Are you sure you don't mind me staying here?"

"I am more than sure. Also...maybe I should have told you this earlier but I kept my keys when I left."

"As long as you didn't use them to watch me sleep I'm fine with that." Alex smiled. "Also now the locks have changed and a new security system is installed so you lost your chance." 

"Too bad." Henry joked. "I wonder what I will do in my sleepless nights from now on." 

"Speaking of nights, will you still be at Pez's?"

"Yes. Not like I have many choices. Hotels are full of people and the last thing I want is to create drama."

"What do they write about us?"

"Some of them think we...broke up. Others think we're still together. But no one from both our families have said anything so we are all good, I assume." 

Alex nodded. "And...what does your family say?"

"My mom and Bea loves you. No matter what happens between us, I don't think they can just stop now. And others...they are just scared of me staying in America. I mean, those people that broke in, both times, knew the weak points of the home security. So everyone, including Ellen, are suspecting someone from your mother's political environment." 

Alex moved his head before sighing. 

"Also -ehm, about our fight--"

"Henry, I... I really don't wanna talk about that..." 

Henry nodded. "Alright... Whenever you feel ready." 

"Thank you." 

"Do you have other questions?"

"Less of a question... I'm not...ready to do... anything right now. Like sex or blowjobs or--"

"No, no, no... Don't worry."

"I want to take things slow. So if that's a problem with you--"

"Not an issue at all, we will do everything in your own time." Henry reassured him. 

"I want us to start from the beginning. Hang out, get drunk together, go on dates and see how it goes from there. Are you good with that?"

"Yes I am." 

"And if we can't take it..."

"We stop." Henry said sadly and Alex nodded. 

"Can I...ask something as well?" Another nod. "If we...don't, ehm- we don't..."

"If we don't make it?"

"Yes... If we don't work out...what will happen?" Henry's frightened gaze met his. 

"What do you want to happen?" 

"I just...don't want to lose you. From my life."

Alex smiled. "That can be arranged. I hope you know that no one can escape a Claremont Diaz." He joked and touched his hand playfully. Henry laced his fingers with his. 

"Look at us being all responsible and talking it out like adults..."

"Do you still remember Nora's remark?"

"Whoa whoa, you saw Nora for a fucking second before I closed the door. When did she manage to tell you?" 

Henry laughed. "I will use my right to remain silent."

It was less interrogative and more talkative after they were done with this talk. Henry stayed for four more hours, around the time June texted the performance was over and they were returning home. 

"Around ten pm tomorrow?"

"Make it twelve. I need my beauty sleep." Alex said when he opened the door for Henry to get out. "Where will we go?"

"That's a surprise."

"Will there be people?"

"Not many. It was like our spot so it had to be calm." Henry smiled one last time. "Thank you for today."

Alex pulled him into an awkward half-hug before letting him go. And the next thing happened before anyone could see it coming. 

The next moment Henry's lips aimed for his cheek and his lips aimed for Henry's cheek but instead they kissed each other on the edge of the lips and pulled back the next second. Henry cleared his throat. 

"Good night then." 

It was long after Henry left that Alex closed the door and breathed properly. And figured out two things. 

One, Henry probably kisses like the Greek God he is. 

And two, 

If that small accidental kiss was capable of making Alex's heart flatter like that, he didn't want to think what would happen if he kissed him properly. Or if Henry kissed him. On the lips or the neck or the chest or the collarbone or if he had traveled down--

Oh. Fuck. 

Alex didn't get much of his beauty sleep that night. If even for one second his eyes fluttered close, Henry was magically appearing, coming so close to him he could almost feel his scent. 

The only time he managed to sleep was when morning finally came. Messaging Henry an apology, he rescheduled their date for the same night and fell asleep on the guest room. The girls had taken his bedroom since they came since Alex swore he wouldn't move in there again. 

When it was around ten, Alex was done dressing himself, finally settling for a turtleneck, pants and a jacket before he heard the bell ring. 

The girls had left a while ago with Pez. And unless they had forgotten something, they would let them alone. So that meant that Henry was here. 

Alex inhaled. 

𝘖𝘬𝘢𝘺 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧. 

Opening the door, murmuring this phrase as a mantra, he saw Henry, beautiful as always, dressed in the prettiest uniform he had ever seen and his breath got caught up on his throat. 

"Hi..." Henry smiled. "May I come in?"

Alex moved his body a bit to give him space. But the moment Henry raised the sleeves up and moved to get inside, Alex realized he really had no self control. 

The blonde eyed him while slowly closing the door. 

"Alex, are you alr--" 

The next second the brunette had grabbed him by the tie and kissed him passionately. He got off him the next second, Henry's eyes growing wider and wider. 

"Fuck, I'm so sorry..." 

"But 𝘐 am not." Henry kissed him again, moving his body closer, so that there were only inches left between them. He stopped just to catch their breaths. 

"Just to be on the same page, do you want this as much as I want--"

"Henry just shut up." Alex's mouth was back to him and he couldn't describe shit of what his brain was doing right now. It was like a very good drug had spread and he was feeling so good, yet he wanted more. 

Henry could probably read his mind by now, cause next moment he was off the floor, legs around his waist as the blonde was getting them both upstairs, too busy to even slow down. 

Henry opened the door with his foot and dropping them both on the bed, still kissing without stopping. 

How did they do this? Who...did what? 

When Henry's fingers was helping undressing him and his lips were back on his, all the questions he had magically disappeared. 

And Alex realized two things. 

One, Henry DOES kiss like a Greek God. 

And two, now he could tell what happens if Henry kissed him anywhere. Or did...other things. 

"This was...not supposed to happen." Alex got his pants back on, moving away from the bed. Also, without knowing, Henry had carried them to their old bedroom and Alex realized it a bit too late. He made a mental note to change the sheets before the girls got back. 

Dressing himself again, he turned slowly to the other side, watching as Henry was buttoning his shirt again, eyes on his. 

"Do you, ehm..." Henry cleared his throat, eyes hiding fear. "Do you regret this?" 

Alex was ready to say yes, but who was he kidding? Like he didn't want to jump back on bed and go for a second round RIGHT NOW. 

"Wh- no! Fuck no..." He sat back on the bed. "I wanted this. Do you?"

"No. I don't." 

"Good. So I don't regret it and you don't regret it. Are we good?" 

Henry managed to nod. 

"Fuck... Was sex...always like this?"

Henry swore his heart would fail him by now. If because of this, Alex would go back on hating him, he would curse himself forever. 

"When you mean like this?"

Alex felt Henry still. Like when you have that fathom feeling something is somewhere but it's no longer there? Does that make sense? Can you overdose of a person? Can you 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 to overdose of a person? 

"It was...different." 

Henry frowned as he approached him. "You are...okay, right? I didn't...do something..."

"No, it was good. All good." Alex pushed up a smile. Even if the feeling felt...unfamiliar, it was nice. Not hurt, just unfamiliar. 

𝘏-𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵𝘴... 

𝘐 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦. 𝘐 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘐'𝘭𝘭 𝘤𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘢 𝘥𝘰𝘤𝘵𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰 𝘪𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘱 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘢𝘭𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵? 

And then a press on his forehead. A kiss. 

"Alex? Did you hear me?"

"Were you...in my hospital room?"

"When did- yes, I was..."

"I... I felt you..." 

Henry's gaze softened as he approached him with a teary smile. "You...remembered?"

"Just this. Your voice. I told you that it hurt and you told me--"

"That I would call a doctor..." It's not that Henry was utterly disappointed he didn't actually remember everything. That was a start. That was a good start. "What if you call your doctor? Tell him that you had a memory come back? Maybe you did something you hadn't done before--"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa... The only different thing is that this time I had sex and then I remembered. And there is absolutely no way I'm calling a man in the middle of the night to tell him I got laid..." 

 "Alright, well... You can just refer the fact you remembered... The next appointment is tomorrow, right?" 

Alex nodded. "Okay..."

Henry nodded as well. "Good."

They both raised their faces to look at each other. 

"Now...what?" 

"Do you think the restaurant will let us in if we go now? I'm fucking starving." 

"Technically we are late half an hour already."

"Doesn't it take one hour for the reservation to be given away?"

"And we need at least ten minutes to go there." 

Alex eyed him from head to toe, his eyes half closed. "How quickly can you get dressed?" 

"You'll be surprised." 

"Great. Get dressed, while I change the sheets before my sister murders me in my sleep." Alex went to leave before stopping by the door. "Also... I want you to know that I don't want this to change things between us. I'd still like to...take it slow and see-"

"Of course." Henry smiled as he fixed his shirt. "The spare sheets are on the second cabinet."

As Alex left the man behind and each step was taking him farther away from the room, he gulped. 

He should have kissed him one last time. Just once. 

"Earth to Alex..." June waved in front of his face after two failed attempts to speak to him. The brunette left his fork back down as he raised his eyes. 

"Finally. Sleeping with eyes open?"

"I'm exhausted..." Alex yawned again as if to highlight his words. "Worst thing is I have to go through a fucking examination. Again."

"Was the date so boring yesterday?" Nora asked with a wink as she shoved a pastry piece inside her mouth. 

Alex sighed. "I'll say this just once, just to get this over with. I slept with Henry." 

Nora choked on her food and June stood up abruptly. 

"What?" June almost yelled. "Oh my God! Oh my f--"

"I won! Told you!" Nora said between her coughs. 

"Wait, wait. Won what?" 

"It doesn't matter!" 

"Do you think Pez knows by now?" The smirk returned to Nora's face. 

"Ehm, can you please fucking not?" 

"Don't worry. Your secret is safe. But how?"

"June, bug, don't make me explain to you how this works." 

"No, I meant... Who made the first move?" 

"I'm not telling you that."

"Wait, so you didn't go to the restaurant?"

"We went...just afterwards."

"That's my boy..." Nora hit him playfully on the arm. "See, that's what happens when you have program--"

June frowned,still lost in thought. "Wait, wait... Tell me that- oh my God! They did it on our bed!"

Nora's eyes widened more than Alex ever saw them do so. "You're 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 kidding..."

"I was gonna tell you just now, I swear!"

"I told you when we returned today in the morning, Nora! I said that I remembered our sheets to be different and, oh my God!"

"Stop bringing God into this!" Alex's face had turned red. "I changed the sheets because yes, in fact we got it over with quick enough and on the wrong room... BUT I cleaned everything afterwards."

"Screw the cleaning part! I'm traumatized for life now... Thanks a lot, Alex." Nora joked as she went back on eating. 

"Y'know what? You wanna go back to the guest room? Go ahead, we'll switch. Again." Alex was ready to stand when a hand landed on his. 

"Jokes aside...are you good?" 

"I'm not gonna answer that." The doorbell ringing made him remove his hand. "Fuck... It's Henry."

June stood up as well. "I'll go open the door."

"And not a word!" The brunette rushed upstairs to get dressed while the girls looked at each other. 

"I can't believe you won."

"Well, I can, babe... It was only a matter of time." 

Only a matter of time. 

It was only a matter of time for Alex to go to the doctor's office with Henry. 

It was only a matter of time for Alex to come back outside with the doctor, telling them to come by next day for the results. 

It was only a matter of time for the pair to come back on the now empty brownstone. 

And it was only a matter of time for them to start kissing each other again, not planning on stopping, even after they reached their room. 

𝘐𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘴, Alex said to himself as he stood up to put his pants back on. Henry, even hesitantly, seeing Alex not staying, was enough of a reason to make him also stand, awkwardly. 

"Do you want to have a shower?" Alex felt the need to ask, without looking at him. 

"No, it's fine. I'll have one back home."

Home... Pez's home. 

It was a long moment after that when Henry cleared his throat. "I guess I'm...leaving."

Alex nodded. 

"Do you need me anything else?"

Did that sound bad? Or like assuming Alex wanted him just for sex? 

Alex shook his head. No. 

"Alright...Goodbye then." 

Don't leave this hanging between you, something told him. Don't let him leave and turn things awkward again--

"Wait!" Alex yelled and Henry immediately stayed still. Well, that was a way to start the conversation... 

Alex got over next to him, holding out both of his hands. Henry wasn't quick to realize, but eventually their hands met in the middle, intertwining their fingers. 

"I don't... I don't want us to be awkward. Or think I use you for sex--"

"No..." Henry said with a soothing voice. "No. I'd take anything you give me--"

"But you don't deserve all the shit I'm throwing your way. Yes, I'm going through some stuff. But you are a person, for fuck's--"

"Hey..." Henry brought his forehead against Alex's. And Alex, surprisingly, didn't feel the desire make fun. Or crack a joke. Instead he leaned into the feeling of Henry. Henry. Just Henry. 

"Trust me, I wanted this as much as you wanted this." He whispered. 

"Impossible." Henry let out a humorless laugh at this remark. But continued holding Alex's hands and stroking them with his thumbs. 

"We're good?"

"We're good." Alex repeated before he brought his nose to nuzzle with his. It wasn't long after Henry closed his eyes. 

His mouth was right here. Right next to his... 

With a smooth movement, Alex put his lips on Henry's, closing his eyes as well. It was a soft kiss, a slow kiss. A kiss more to taste each other than to feel lust. 

"We should stop." Alex murmured when they broke apart for a second, their eyes still shut.

"We should." 

But none of them took a step back. Alex could still feel the small puffs of air landing on his cheek. He supposed Henry could feel them too. 

"I suggest...we could do this once and then we stop." 

"I agree, good..." 

They both took advantage of the last kiss until they couldn't breathe anymore. But still, they stayed up close. 

"And...one more?" Henry suggested. "And then we stop."

"What the heck, yes..." Alex said and his lips were back on his. 

They promised to stop for seven more times after that. 

Then they went back to bed. 

When they promised that this time they would make love, would indeed be the last. 

Chapter Text

The next morning, Henry was gone. Alex felt a weird sense of deja vu when he said this out loud, but he couldn't tell why. He could have stayed. Alex wouldn't mind. He didn't tell him to leave after they had sex. 

Well he didn't tell him to stay either. But wasn't that sort of...implied? 

"What's on your mind today?" His sister shook him from his seat where they were having breakfast. 

"Nothing." He took a sip from his coffee, avoiding eye contact. 

"You're quiet. Weirdly quiet."

"Please tell me you didn't vandalize our bed again and this time we slept on it..."

"Can we...please talk about something else? How was your day with Pez?" 

"Good. We had fun. Now, did Henry stay here?"

Alex's face indicated that he was done. Absolutely done. 

"No. Or yes... I don't know." 

"That was a trick question. We saw him leaving."

Alex raised his head. "What?"

"When he was leaving yesterday, we saw him at the front door."

"Oh...okay... Did he look...I dunno, disappointed, or..."

"Jesus... What did you do to him?" 

"Can you just answer the question?"

"Weren't you the one who said you wanted to speak about things instead of running away? Wasn't that your condition?"

"Just... Fine, you know what, I'll go ask him. Like a mature person would do." Alex stood up, leaving his coffee behind. It was only a few seconds later that he returned, eyeing the cup suspiciously. 

"Do you think we have a plastic cup so I can take this with me?"

When Henry raised his eyes from his office, he saw Alex, holding two plastic cups and a paper bag. He barely hid a grin behind his hand. This was something Alex had done before. Maybe he didn't remember, but he did. 

"Er... Good morning?"

"Hey... I...brought food. Do you have time?"

"Yes, always..." Henry stood up, circled his office and got a chair out for him. He sat on the other, across Alex. "How are you?"

"Me? All good." Alex gave him something out of his bag. "How is your day?"

"So far...all good."

"Great."

"Good." 

A pin could be heard dropping in all that silence. That's until Alex spoke. 

"You cannot believe what happened to me today." 

And then he started talking. He talked about the paparazzi he had to run away from in the morning, a toddler that recognized him even while he was wearing sunglasses, about his professor that emailed him to retake his class cause he had missed way too many things for him to catch up on. He talked and talked and talked and for the first time, he didn't care for how long he did so. He was sure Henry listened. 

In the meantime, the blonde had raised his legs on his chair and covered his knees with his hands. But still, he kept listening. 

"Sounds like your day was...rough." 

"I just..." Alex sighed. "I think the only thing that keeps me going is that doctor's appointment. If he tells me that my memories, I dunno...are coming back soon, then it's worth it. I can keep studying and go back to life like before."

"I'm pretty sure your memories are coming back soon. You did all this progress by yourself, it's going to be alright."

Alex smiled as he stretched his hands to find Henry's. He gave a comforting squeeze. "Thank you. You are a good listener." 

"I've been told."

"By who?" Alex raised an eyebrow. "Oh... It's- it's me, right?" 

"And given the fact that you told me that after your accident I don't know what to assume." Henry said jokingly. 

"Hey! That doesn't count! I take it back. See? I just took it. And I'll say it again. You're a good listener."

Henry smiled. "Thank you, Alex."

"Now... How was your day?"

The couple separated until night came, when Henry was again invited to the brownstone. It was not even an hour later when they were back to the bed, Alex now sitting on Henry's lap, completely joined with the latter. Henry left out a groan as he came, Alex following shortly after, moving his head back. The blonde found the chance to kiss his neck. 

"Are you alright?"

God, he was more than alright. Maybe it was the fact they had switched roles, the first time they had done so since the accident. Or maybe it was the fact that Henry was perfect. Perfect in any way. 

Alex nodded yes, but in the bliss of the moment a tear slipped. Before he could explain, Henry moved forward and kissed his cheek quickly. Seeing Alex's shocked expression, he was ready to apologize, but the brunette simply giggled and continued stroking his cheeks. 

"Will you come with me tomorrow?"

"I thought that was well established already. Seven a.m?"

Alex nodded before giving him a soft head bump. 

"Do you want to...maybe stay the night?"

Henry immediately tensed under his touch, but tried to remain calm. "Y-yeah? I can?"

"We just had sex. We still do, somehow. Of course you can stay." Alex laughed and Henry let out a laugh as well, heart secretly melting at the process. 

"Under one condition!" Alex broke their kiss just to appear strict. "Don't leave in the middle of the night again please. Either stay or not." He said with no bitter. Just sadness. 

"I can stay." Henry smiled with that promise. 

The morning found them together again, only this time drifted apart, during the night. Alex had moved to his side, dangerously near the edge of the bed, while Henry had his hand stretched, as if he wanted to grab him. 

The blonde woke up first and he took his sweet time observing his surroundings. The bed, cozy and bouncy underneath him, the chair next to the window,with a blanket draped over it, their closet, half open like Alex got dressed in a hurry the last time. And lastly their clothes, still discarded on the floor, a reminder of last night. 

He had missed this room, this house, 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴, more than he thought he would. 

To his dismay, Henry realized they had less than five minutes of sleep before their alarm would wake them and they would have to get on with their day. And he could spend them looking at the ceiling and getting emotional, or... 

Moving closer to Alex's side, he first gently wrapped an arm around his waist, as if to bring him closer (and not risk falling off the bed), before he started caressing his curls back, admiring the way his face looked so relaxed under the morning light. 

Alex mumbled something incoherent, before turning around and burying his face on the crook of Henry's neck. The prince immediately stilled at the action. 

"Good morning." He spoke when he felt a harsh puff of breath on his skin. 

"Morning." Alex said sheepishly, but Henry could sense a smile forming on his lips. "What time is it?"

"Almost six thirty." 

"Fuck." Alex cursed, forcing himself to let go off the blonde to rub his eyes and get off the bed. "Are you hungry? Or we will pick breakfast as a celebration afterwards?"

"As a celebration?"

"For the good news, idiot." Alex put on a clean pair of underwears, before making his way to the closet. "If one time we had sex I remembered a whole scene of my life, can you imagine the possibilities? I might remember everything by tomorrow."

"Let me clarify this, how 𝘮𝘢𝘯𝘺 times we will have sex till tomorrow so you can remember four years worth of memories?" Henry joked, appearing slightly horrified, making Alex laugh, before tossing him a small pile of clothes."

"New underwear, shirt and pants. Get dressed." Alex teased and closed the door behind him, as he entered the bathroom. 

Looking down at the messy pile, Henry tried to recognize to whom these clothes belonged. Because for sure he couldn't be his. 

But of course... They had renovated the house completely, his clothes were all on Pez's home, of course he would find no trace of him here. 

Forcing the lump on his throat to go down, he began searching for the underwear. Alex had said he had left one. 

Crumpled between the shirt and the pants, a unique underwear, with the American flag, was looking right back at him. 

"Also I was thinking..." Alex yelled behind the bathroom door. "How about we go by Pez's house before we return here? Bring your stuff back here?" 

"My-- stuff?" 

Alex opened the bathroom door, raising his eyebrow. 

"You slept here yesterday."

"I...am aware."

"Wouldn't you like to...move back in? To see how it goes?"

"Alex..." Henry exhaled. "I'd love to." 

For a second, the brunette smiled. Then he shook his head abruptly. 

"Get dressed! You are making me distracted!" He said before closing the door again. 

And maybe it didn't mean anything in particular, but a smile escaped Henry anyway. 

He would return home. Alex would remember and everything would be as before. 

The route to the hospital was quick, Cash was waiting for them outside already, when the couple appeared behind the door of the brownstone. Henry was mostly the one who spoke, barely small talk, while Alex was fiddling on his seat, tightening and un tightening his tie, or focusing on the cars passing by. 

The doctor seemed to expect them as well. They got to the hospital from the back door as they got advised, moved to the second floor, where Alex's doctor was waiting patiently, with another doctor on his side. 

"Mr. Claremont Diaz." He greeted them. "Your highness. This is doctor Stuart. She will accompany us inside for the exams. She has already signed a NDA." 

"Your royal highness..." The woman (surely British, from the accent) went to bow a bit, when Henry stopped her. 

"There's no need." He felt Alex rolling his eyes fondly. 

"Now shall we?" 

"Sure." Alex touched Henry's hand for a comforting squeeze, while the doctors began walking. 

"I'll be right here." The blonde smiled. "Right outside." 

Alex nodded, half certain, and Henry could tell he wished they were somewhere more private. Maybe he could kiss him too. 

Giving a last squeeze, they untangled and Henry watched Alex leave, disappear behind a door, that looked just like the others. 

Since everyone (that knew Alex) knew that the brunette would either be stressed out (and moody) or super confident in the positive result, they decided not to risk it. 

Hence why Henry woke up to a new group chat with June, Nora, Alex's parents, Zahra, Pez and even Bea, called, in all capitals... 

ALEX'S PROGRESS. 

The bad news was well... Henry had no news to share. 

Alex was gone for around half an hour now and Henry was pacing back and forth, politely declining the offers for coffee from nurses and debating whether to stay where he was or go buy something from the gift shop and return later. 

For a man that had only Alex on his mind, he for sure missed the doctor coming to him, until he was right in front of his face. 

"Doctor." Henry pushed up a kind smile. "How is Alex?" 

The doctor momentarily looked down, so Henry decided to speak more. 

"I don't know if he has told you, but he has done progress. He has remembered what happened while he was on the hospital bed, while we were around." Henry caught the doctor biting his lower lip, so he decided to stop. 

"Your royal highness..." The man cleared his throat. "Mr. Claremont Diaz gave me permission to share this. We did some new exams, we compared them to older ones, we asked a few more questions, but..." 

"But?"

"He won't remember." The doctor said. "Maybe he will have a very few memories coming back to his mind, but the biggest part...we believe is all gone." 

"Just...like that?" Henry bit his lip to stop it from quivering. 

"I am afraid yes. I am so sorry." The man took a step back. "Mr. Claremont Diaz is on the last room down the hallway. He complained of dizziness, so we kept him for a while for observation. In about fifteen minutes if he doesn't complain about anything else, he will be ready to go." 

"Thank you." Henry nodded, desperate for the man to leave, to clear his path, to let him go to Alex--

But how would he go to Alex like that? With wet eyes? Broken voice? And go to convince him that what? Everything was fine? 

He didn't even look the part. 

So he got out his phone, went to the group chat and began typing... 

Alex allowed the doctor to inform Henry. After all, if not him, he would have to do it himself, and that was something he wanted to avoid. 

If Henry wanted to leave, this would be the best excuse. The perfect walking out. And since the doctor had gone off five minutes ago, and Henry was nowhere to be seen, Alex assumed Henry simply took his chance and left. 

What he didn't expect was a knock on the door, followed by the door opening, and a large blue balloon with 'Congratulations' written on it coming inside first, followed by Henry, who was fighting for his life, trying to pass by the doorframe without popping the balloon or hurting the yellow roses on his other hand. 

And Alex if anything looked...surprised.

Hadn't the doctor tell him? Why was Henry here, with balloons and bouquets and his perfect, dreamy smile, as if everything was well? 

Maybe he didn't know. And now Alex had to let him know, to let him down slowly. 

"Hey..." Henry broke the silence first. 

"Hey." Alex forced a smile. "You are...here." 

"Why wouldn't I be?" 

Alex's smile faded. "I thought the doctor told you, but whatever. I can't remember. I won't remember. Not today, not tomorrow, not anytime soon."

"I...knew that. The doctor told me." Henry furrowed his eyebrows, like he didn't understand the problem. 

"Then why--" 

"Why the celebration? Because either way this shouldn't have been easy." Henry tied the balloon on the edge of the bed, before bringing a chair next to it, closer to the brunette. "Coming here, ready to be diagnosed with news concerning your life and your brain. And I'm sorry you had to go through that."

"It's not your fault." 

Henry cleared his throat. "So...the flowers are for you." Henry left them on Alex's hands, before the latter smiled. "I had to go down the street to find a flower shop with yellow roses. Gave some pedestrians quite a shock." At this Alex laughed. "I also bought chocolate, but apparently Cash told me it was melting already? Was this supposed to happen so soon? Like I swear, the one minute it was on my hands and the next--"

"So you got me flowers 𝘢𝘯𝘥 chocolate." 

"Which I left on the car. And the balloon is from the gift shop. You are lucky it had your favorite colour. For congratulations."

Alex gave the huge balloon a quick look. 

"Henry, just a quick question, what does congratulations means in British English?"

"The same with the American ones, I assume." Henry teased. "Otherwise we have to remake a lot of our conversations."

"You know this is a gift for people who give birth, right?"

"What? The balloon?" 

"Yes."

"B- but it says..." Henry opened his eyes wide. "Oh my God..."

"Given the fact that hospitals exist in Europe, I don't know what to assume." Alex snorted with laughter. Real laughter, that made his head bounce uncomfortably, but laughter regardless. 

"I never went to one to witness a birth! I was the youngest child in my family and with my nieces Philip made everyone's presents get tested before they even reached the room! No one brought a balloon! How was I supposed to--" 

"Thank you." The brunette cut him short, squeezing his hand. "But I'm telling you, if the picture of us leaving the hospital with the balloon makes it to the front page, you are gonna be the one who explains to Zahra why this happened."

"Why me? She will decapitate me." 

"Well, then you will have no head and I will have one that doesn't work. It's only fair." 

Henry huffed a laugh, letting his eyes fall on their conjoined hands. 

"I mean it though. I am proud of you." 

Alex hesitated for a second, before he patted the place next to him. And who was Henry to deny him? 

"Are you alright? The doctor said you felt dizzy."

"Long story. I get it when I'm hungr--"

"Maybe you should've eaten--" Henry said at the same time. 

"It's unbelievable how well you know me." Alex grinned. "It feels like I haven't surprised you at all." 

"You have." Henry passed an arm around his shoulders, looking at him fondly. "Twice by now. First when you told me you about the myth of Achilles. I certainly had no idea you knew."

"The second?" 

"When you came to my office. And gave me a second chance." The prince smiled. "I won't let that go to waste."

"You didn't sign up for this though." Alex pointed at his head and exhaled. "When you said yes in the beginning." 

"Neither did you." Henry frowned. "I don't know if the small chance of having amnesia was written anywhere in your contact."

Alex shoved him playfully, but the blonde simply brought him closer again. 

"But I signed up for better and for worst and that covers everything, basically. I want it all. All with you." 

Alex didn't need to think twice before kissing him right there. 

For a second Henry was taken aback, but then he was kissing him with the same passion, cupping his face in the process. 

"Did I surprise you?" Alex breathed out when they broke apart for air. 

"For the third time." Henry smiled, content. 

When the fifteen minutes finally passed, the couple somehow managed to get out of the back door and out of the building without anyone (but the staff of the hospital) noticing the large balloon and the clear absence of an infant. Cash gave them a weird look, but stuffed it on the back of the car happily, while the pair settled. 

"Everything okay, guys?" The driver went back to his seat, grasping at the steering wheel. 

"Yeah. All good." Alex smiled and Cash nodded. 

"Are we going back home?" 

"Pez's house actually, Cash. And then back home." Alex saw Henry's look of surprise so he elaborated. "I thought we would stay together. I figured we could get some of your stuff now. If you'd like."

"I'll call Maria to help me with my bags then. She must be over, I'll give her a call." The prince smiled and Alex nodded. 

"And then we could go home? And maybe fix you a nice, American breakfast while you have a nice, relaxing bath?" 

Henry furrowed his eyebrows. "Why the pampering all of a sudden?"

"Are you against it?"

"Not at all, but...I am the one who was supposed to pamper you today."

"It's a two way street, baby." Alex teased, stroking his chest. "Let me do something good for you too." 

"You already did. You asked me to move in..."

"Like you didn't want to."

"But you were the one that said it. And then said it again. And now again--"

"Don't flatter yourself. I did that for...selfish reasons..."

"Selfish reasons?"

"Yeah. It's not like I want you staying with me." Alex joked. "I'm just thinking of the price of electricity poor Percy has to pay so you can live there."

"Oh, you are so environmentally aware, darling..." Henry rolled his eyes. "So you did this so we can save light? What's next? Bathing together so we can save water?" 

"I have a green thumb, who can blame me?" Henry laughed, while Alex lowered his head, so he could place it on the blonde's lap. Then without warning he touched Henry's hand to bring it to his forehead. It wasn't foreign to Henry what he was asking for. 

"You have magical fingers, you know that?" He mumbled when the fingers started massaging his head. 

"Rest, darling." Henry let a smile form on his lips. "You have to help me with my bags afterwards." 

The good thing about Henry settling back in was that no effort was needed. 

Sure, they had to put the clothes back in the wardrobe, and bring all the items Henry was forced to take before leaving, but still. 

It was like they fitted so perfectly, even the house had an empty spot for Henry. 

Alex 𝘥𝘪𝘥 make the nice, American breakfast he had promised and spent the rest of the day curled up in the couch next to Henry, either commenting on something they were watching on TV or unpacking the boxes (with little stories about each photograph or gift). David was sitting between them, enjoying the treats and the petting with a wagging tail. 

Henry had just gotten out a photo of the two of them outside of the house, on their first day there, when Alex gasped. 

"I felt like I've seen this one before." 

"Probably because you have." Henry smiled. "You were the one with the idea of taking this photo. My hands were aching from carrying boxes and we spent five minutes taking photos because apparently my smile didn't look real enough."

"Look, I don't even remember it, but I just 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 I was right. You clearly have different smiles when you pose and when you don't, and don't deny it, I've seen it."

Henry huffed a laugh, but otherwise didn't speak. He just let his hand trace the picture softly. 

"We look happy here."

"We do. You did a good job."

"Henry..." Alex bit his lower lip, staring at the eyes of the blonde. "Why did we fight before I lost my memories?"

The prince took a deep breath, as if he was fighting not to break. 

"You were busy with law school and sometimes we...struggled. I complained, but I never voiced my thoughts to you. I went to leave, as you may read on my letters, you came to the airport, we fought and then I told you..." 

"You told me...that I don't belong to your family, right?" Alex asked. "I read that too." 

"I didn't mean it--" Henry went to explain himself when Alex intertwined their hands.

"Are you willing to stay and talk about our differences next time?" 

"More than willing, actually." Henry pushed up a smile. 

"I know. And because I know me too, I cannot guarantee that I will just stop forgetting or letting time consume me. But I can put an alarm... Or a note, somewhere I can see it." 

"Or have Cash inform you." Henry nodded. "It wasn't that hard after all." 

"It wasn't."

"And about what I said...what I did...that was fucked up too, Alex and I am so--" A tiny squeeze made him stop. 

"I know. I'm pretty sure I did my fair share of fucking up too." The brunette smiled. "But now we are here, aren't we?"

"We are." Henry brought their hands to his lips to kiss his knuckles. "Thank you for giving me another chance."

"It's you who didn't stop fighting for us. Otherwise I'd be alone in my room, watching Bake off and trying to fantasize me, wearing that stupid American underwear."

"Speaking of which... I was wearing it the whole morning."

"Was it comfy? Did it fit you well?" Alex raised his eyebrows seductively. 

"Oh, really well..." Henry joked and Alex laughed. 

"How about...we go upstairs...to show me?" The brunette suggested, stroking the prince's chest, before leaning in to place an open mouthed kiss on his lips. Henry was quick to dive back in when they broke apart, not stopping even between giggles. 

He didn't seem to stop even when Alex's phone started ringing. 

"Hang on, it's my mom." Alex shoved him playfully and picked it up, putting it on speaker. "Hey mom." 

"Hi, sugar. How are you?"

"Could've been worse." Alex smiled at Henry. "Henry is right here telling me a story about when we first moved in."

"Hello Ellen."

"Hello Henry. Okay, nice, just checking in. Have the new guards arrived yet?"

"Yes, a while ago. Why the sudden interest? Don't they inform you first?" 

"Yes, they do. Just clarifying, is one of them a blonde one? With a beard?" 

"If by blonde one with a beard you mean Shawn, the guy who was your bodyguard on the trip to Paris, then yes." 

"What trip?"

"When you first got elected? First Christmas." 

"I...think we are talking about the same one."

Alex chose to ignore the surprise on Henry's face and just stretched his hand to caress his thigh with his thumb. 

"Did something happen? I spoke with dad and June when we returned from the hospital and I texted you half an hour ago--"

"I wanted to check that the guards were actually the guards this time. Do you remember the robbers? The first ones?" Alex's breath got caught on his throat and Henry touched his hand comfortingly. Even David sensed the difference and got out of the couch, leaning on Alex's knees. 

"The ones that smashed my head?" 

"Yes. They...were arrested for a bar fight in Italy. Yesterday. Today came the confirmation that their footprints are the same they were found inside their getaway van and they were brought in DC." 

"O- okay..." Alex took a deep, but shaky breath. "What do I have to do?"

"The police are suggesting it's better if you come to see them. They will be held either way, but they think that if you recognize them--"

"Now that they have arrested all four of them, isn't easier to track down who was behind this?" Henry asked, obviously upset. 

"That's what they are trying. So far none of them have spoken. I wouldn't tell you this at all, but I think it has to be your choice to go or not to."

"Mom, either way, I can't fucking remember them!"

"If you see them? Their work would be so easier if you recognized who hit you at least." 

"Could I...think of it? And go tomorrow?" 

A sigh was heard from the phone. "Okay, sugar. Call me first, alright? So they will know to expect you."

"Okay mom. Good night."

When Alex hung up, Henry was left looking at him. 

"They caught them."

"They did. It's over."

"Why do I feel now it's only the beginning?" Alex petted David from where the beagle was sitting, his eyes betraying fear. 

"They can't hurt you anymore, you know that right? The guards outside are people you knew, one at least. We are safe in here." 

Alex laid back on Henry's arms, the latter rearranging their bodies, so Alex could lay on his chest. 

"Can we talk about something else before I lose my mind?"

Henry thought about it for a second. 

"Okay...shall I be concerned you remember a bodyguard from over seven years ago, and that bodyguard is outside right now?"

Alex snorted, his face hidden in Henry's jumper. 

"He must be around fifty now. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 seven years ago he had three kids. Should you be worried you think? Plus..." Alex raised his head to smirk. "He is not the one I'm sharing the couch with or the one whose underwear I wanted to see, is he?" 

"You won me with the panties one." Henry gave him a small kiss, stroking his biceps. "I am glad you remember details, even if that's about the bodyguard with the kids."

"He was really talkative and loved his kids, I was really talkative and bored, who is to blame here?" Alex buried his face back on the comforting scent, letting a few silent minutes pass. 

"Sometimes I think I will wake up and I won't remember my own name." He mumbled and Henry's hand on his hair stopped moving. He went on, though, when Alex got a sharp breath out. "The doctor said it's not possible, but sometimes I like to check."

"Check?" 

Alex didn't raise his head. "I go in front of the mirror and try to remember everything and everyone I love. I don't want one day to...forget them."

"You won't."

"But if I do?" 

"If you do... I will be there. And I will remind you." The brunette raised his head, and to his surprise the prince had teary eyes. "Your name is Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz. You were born on March 27. You have a sister named June. Your parents' names are Ellen Claremont and Oscar Diaz. Your best friend is Nora Holleran. It's not 2019 anymore, four years have passed. You study law. You are an amazing person who wants to help the world. You like the colour blue, you think your abuela makes the best food you've ever eaten, you like mac and cheese but the way 𝘺𝘰𝘶 make it, you put spicy sauce on everything, you sometimes sing in the shower, you like to go for a run really early in the morning if you can't sleep and you do your best. In every scenario you try your best. What else--" 

"You forgot something." Alex smiled. "I have an amazing boyfriend that I was super wrong about, but very happy I found him regardless."

"Oh, that too." Henry pretended to joke and Alex pretended he didn't see the tear running down the blonde's cheek when he kissed him. 

Chapter Text

The night was filled with nightmares, but if Alex wasn't so damn sleepy, he would tell it didn't matter. Henry, being the well known insomniac, needed to watch at least an episode of Bake off to get tired and by that time Alex was jostled awake twice. Not with screaming and crying. But still, the view of him, getting startled and trying to go to sleep again was enough for Henry to abandon the episode and take him on a mini tour around the house, just to make sure no intruder was inside and no one would get inside any time soon. 

To kill the time awake, Henry offered to show him some pictures of his family in England. Obviously Alex had seen them before the accident, but he was still curious about the little family album. 

Okay, more curious about seeing Henry as a small, royal baby, but still. 

"This is my brother Philip, you've seen him before. His wife, Martha. And their daughters." The blonde pointed first at the youngest. "Elizabeth. And this one..." He pointed at the older. "Penelope. You are her favourite." 

"She has a good sense of style then. The real question is how on earth did Philip allow me anywhere near his children after the Cake Gate." 

Henry laughed. "He's no longer bitter about this. He has started to like you more. He even came to visit us when we fought. I, on the meantime, had left to go to London, but it's the thought that counts." He would continue, but he watched Alex yawn and move closer. 

"Do you want us to move? Go to Pez's maybe? He has security too and no one would know but us."

"I love that house. And before today I had a while to see a nightmare. And I am afraid I can't remember their faces at all."

"Okay..."

"But I'd like to go to DC and try to remember them. This is something important, and if my confirmation lands them more years in prison, or helps me remember something significant, I still wanna do it." 

"Okay." 

"Okay?"

"I'll be with you. How about we wake up early to fix two bags and call Cash when we are ready?" 

Alex nodded. "I'm...not that ready to go to sleep yet."

"I have a Bake off episode on hold. If you'd like." 

Alex sighed loudly before moving to wrap his arms around Henry's torso, burying his face on his chest. 

"Henry?" 

"Yes, dear?" 

"I think you were what made old Alex's life special." 

For a second Henry went completely still. Then the next second he exhaled shakily, stroking Alex's hair back. 

"I must be doing something good then." 

"The best thing I have experienced in a while." Alex smiled. "I have to say thank you to old Alex I suppose." 

"You have to?"

"Yeah. I seriously doubted him."

Henry would continue then. But he was glad he didn't. 

"Because I think I'm falling in love with you." 

The prince's breath got caught up on his throat. Was that how he would feel back on the summerhouse? When Alex was ready to confess, but he was so scared he ended up leaving? 

Is this how the confession feels without the fear? 

Because for sure Henry felt like it was the first time hearing it too. 

"Baby?" 

And there it was. The fucking handler on the faucet behind his eyes had broken and a tear was already falling down his cheek. 

"Hey, hey... What's wrong? I thought you would be happy. This is good, right? I just told you I love you! Love you is good, right?" The brunette stroked his cheek, looking as puzzled as ever. 

"No, no, no, these are happy tears, darling." Henry rushed to remove Alex's hands out of the way so he can wipe his eyes. "Happy tears." 

"Then I'm glad." Alex winked teasingly. "You can cry all you want. I'm here." 

"And thank God for that..." Henry kissed his knuckles when he found the strength, taking a few deep breaths to ground his breathing. 

"How about we sleep now, huh? We have a long journey tomorrow." The brunette gave him a quick kiss, before settling against his chest and shoulder. 

"Sounds good." Henry gave him a kiss back when he went to settle as well. 

"Night, baby." 

But how was Henry to sleep now that his heart was beating so fast? 

After Alex called his mom to let her know they would come, everything else ran smoothly. Cash came to pick them up pretty early, and around five hours later, they were inside a small room of a police station, waiting for further instructions. No one knew they would be there, hence the authorities not being prepared, but none of them minded. Alex even preferred it that way. To pass quickly, without giving the others, public and police officers, the time to think, the time to remember the accident again. 

They had already talked with Ellen about getting their internet connection back on, and the social media on his phone and he didn't want to lose them again. 

"Try to breathe sugar, okay?" Ellen squeezed his hand. "Someone will come in any--"

A gentle knock was heard on the door, and two secret agents could be barely seen waiting outside, before the door closed again, a woman coming inside. 

"Madam President. Mr. Claremont Diaz. Your Royal Highness." She nodded to acknowledge them. "I am officer Olsen, a detective and the head of the police officer. Pleasure to have you here with us."

"I just wish it was under different circumstances, head officer Olsen. My son is ready for the line up, if everything is ready."

Olsen's smile faded slowly and then all at once. 

"Madam President, before a few minutes, the two confessed. It was a last minute change and I apologize we called you here without a need--"

"They confessed?"

"Only that they were the ones that carried the plan. But they cannot be the minds behind this. They are not American or have family here and from our research, they do not vote, or have anything to do with your political enemies, madam President."

"Unless they were hired like professionals, right? Couldn't that happen?" 

"Of course it can, your Royal Highness. We will study every scenario."

"Can I see them anyway?" Alex asked hesitantly. "Maybe it won't help the case, but it might help me." 

"Of course. Give me a second to call someone then." 

Alex's grip didn't leave Henry for a second. Not even when the room next door, the one they could see inside through an one way mirror, opened and two figures got inside.

When the lights opened, and the only thing between them was the glass, Alex had to remind himself twice that they couldn't see him. That they couldn't hurt him. 

But these faces...they were indeed familiar. 

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵? 𝘞𝘩𝘰 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶? 

And then pain. And darkness. And more pain and...was that blood? 

"Alex..." Henry rubbed his arm. "Breathe." 

"This one..." Alex pointed at the first man. "I saw him. I- I saw him. I...don't remember anything, but me asking him who sent them."

"Do you remember if he responded?"

Alex nodded no. Henry continued rubbing his hand up and down with soft movements. Ellen had her hand on his shoulder, trying to ground her son. 

"You are correct, Mr Claremont Diaz. This is in fact the man who you encountered. While the second--"

"Carried the weapon that hit me?" 

"Exactly." 

Henry's grip tightened as his gaze turned to the criminals. 

They were responsible for this. They were responsible for the accident, they were responsible for Alex losing his memories, for all the suffering, all the pain. And they were just sitting there, undisturbed. 

It just wasn't fucking fair. 

Henry moved before he remembered moving. 

"Henry?"

"Who gave you the right?" Henry opened the microphone and yelled, 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘦𝘥, with all his power. Even the two on the other side seemed startled. 

"Henry, it's--" 

"Who gave you the fucking right to ruin our fucking lives? Uh?" 

Alex came to his side in a second, and so did the officer, who rushed to close the microphone. 

"I hope you rot in there! I hope you--"

"Baby..." Alex tried to calm him. The man who was yelling on the microphone, wasn't his Henry. It was a cold prince from a fairytale, who would throw someone inside a dungeon for less. 

"We regret it." One of them spoke harshly, making them all turn. Alex had heard his voice before, now he was sure. 

"Of course you do." Henry scoffed. 

"They admitted they stole some money and some jewelry pieces, containing a family heirloom that belonged to your father, your royal highness. We have found an amount of the money, but no trace of your jewelry." 

"I'm sorry, Hen."

"It's okay." Henry looked at Alex with the same soft eyes the brunette adored. "Dad would want me to be safe first. And happy." 

"Exactly, baby." Alex smiled sadly. "Are we ready to go?"

"Has the procedure helped you remember anything, Mr Claremont Diaz?"

If anything, it felt even worse. All the clues were in front of him, on display, the men, the things they stole, their voices who seemed familiar... 

And yet Alex's mind was blank. Completely and utterly blank. 

And he realized with horror for the first time, that the doctor was right. 

Ellen managed to convince the couple to stay for a little family gathering on the house, since Oscar was also in Washington and it would be the perfect time for everyone to see each other again. They played Monopoly next to the fireplace, did a small karaoke competition (which was basically Alex and Henry bickering about wrong lyrics) and when the food was done, they all gathered around the not so small table to dine, Henry's hand joined with Alex's, underneath the table. 

"A little toast." Ellen raised her glass, Leo following. "To family."

"And Alex, who finally got his head out of his ass and decided to come here." Nora added and June laughed. 

"Hey!" Alex turned to their mom. "No backup?"

"Alex, sweetheart, I love you. But we've all thought at least once taking you back here so we can be sure you are alright." 

"Rude." Alex drank from his water. "But a lot of things wouldn't happen if you had taken me back, so I'm glad you didn't." 

"I'm glad too." Henry gave him a warm smile and Alex gave one back. 

"Okay, I'm gonna go ahead and ask what everyone is thinking... What happened?" 

Henry gave Alex a nod, before the brunette proceeded. He slowly brought their intertwined hands on the table. 

"Henry and I decided to give our relationship another shot." A few gasps of surprise were heard. "And we started living together. Again."

The girls squealed with excitement, while Ellen and Oscar both exchanged a look. Leo smiled at the boys. 

"Sugar, that's great." 

"We are happy for you, mijo. Both of you." Oscar smiled. "To Alex 𝘢𝘯𝘥 Henry then. For their second new start." 

"And last, let's hope." Henry remarked before Alex kissed him on the cheek, laughing. 

"I don't have plans of forgetting anytime soon, babe." The brunette winked, grabbing his face. "You are stuck with me." 

"Also he has done a great progress with you, Henry." Ellen said and June agreed. "Don't get disheartened by today. It was the correct choice. Coming here to try and recognize them." 

"Doesn't exactly feel like it."

"Trust me son, now they will rot in a cell. And sooner or later they will find out who was behind this."

"Indeed. The police and the secret services have done a great progress." Leo added. 

"Last time when the hitmen didn't finish the job..." Henry's hand tensed around Alex's. "They came back."

Ellen gave Oscar another look, who nodded. 

"We were thinking about this. And we spoke with your mother before too, Henry, so we would be sure she agreed."

"Agreed about what?"

"How will you like it if you go to London for now? At least until the police manages to get a confession out of someone. And since you are the main witness...noone guarantees us that they won't hire a new hitman to hurt you before the trial. London is the only safe choice." 

"To London? Will they...be okay with us there?" 

"Of course they will." Henry spoke. "We will be together. The public knows about us--"

"The public speculates you broke up." Nora cut him short. 

"The public 𝘴𝘰𝘳𝘵 𝘰𝘧 knows about us. But if this is the only place we will be safe in..." 

Alex looked at everyone for a second, before returning his eyes to Henry. 

"I think it's a good idea. Better than waking up to more people trying to kill me."

"It's only until we find the ones behind this. The Republican Party is on the top of the questioning list already. It won't take long before they get to the culprits." 

"We will be safe for sure in the palace. It's unapproachable. But it's your choice entirely."

Something inside his gut was telling Alex not to. But he didn't feel like returning home, not before the case was solved. He could stand going to England for a few days. Anything would be better than another attempt, one that maybe would cost his life or Henry's--

"Okay. Let's go to England then." Alex gulped. "Until they are found at least." He gave Henry a smile. "Can we now talk about something else?"

"That's the only easy thing. Let's talk about how June definitely cheated in Monopoly before."

"What? No I didn't!" 

"Yeah, you did!" 

"Nora, June learned from the best." Oscar winked at his daughter. 

"That's why you ended up on the last place?" Ellen joked, making everyone laugh. 

While the rest went back to their previous conversation, talking and complaining about June winning two rounds on Monopoly, the blonde found the chance to give Alex a proper kiss. One Alex was quick to give back. 

"I was thinking..." 

"You did?" 

"Yes, you idiot, I did!" Alex hit him playfully. "If we go to your family, we have to tell them about us first."

"I can call my mom when we go to the hotel tonight." 

"I meant...tell the world. Obviously we will tell your family. What do you think?" 

"I think that this is the first time we have the chance to tell the world by ourselves." Henry smiled softly. "And I'd like that." 

"Good." Alex smiled right back. 

The couple didn't get to finish that conversation, until the end of the dinner. Cash came to pick them up to take them to their hotel (since Alex had specifically requested to stay elsewhere but the White House) and a few minutes later, they were outside the hotel, on the well known black SUV. 

"My mom said they are waiting for us. We can travel tomorrow morning, so we will arrive early." 

"Sounds good." Alex stopped walking before they reached the gates of the building, causing Henry, who had his hand in his, to also stop. 

"What is it?" 

"A photographer. Right behind the car on the other side of the street." 

"There are more than one, actually." Henry confirmed after a quick look. "I don't know how it concerns us--"

"Kiss me?" Alex suggested hesitantly. 

"Now? They...they will see!" 

"That's the point, isn't it?" Alex smiled. "You said the media is still concerned about if we are together, we are traveling to England together tomorrow, we are hiding from someone who wants me killed apparently, and all that...I can't control! They just happened. But I can control this. I can tell the world again that I am in love with a man and we can come out in our own terms this time. The point is do you want it? Do you want this to be the time we say it because we want to?" 

"Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz." The blonde huffed a laugh. "You never fail to surprise me, do you know that, darling?" 

"I'm gonna take that as a yes." Alex could still hear the clicking of the cameras when he approached Henry, taking both of his hands in his. 

"One." 

"Two." 

"Three."

When they both leaned in for the kiss, Alex could swear he heard a gasp, followed by some more clicking, and he couldn't help but smile into the kiss. Henry did the same and when they broke apart a minute later, he still had a small grin on his face. 

"I've never loved you more than I do right now." 

"I love you more." The brunette let a smile escape him. "Good to know I beat old Alex when it comes to your love." 

Henry rolled his eyes. "Only you would get in a competition with yourself."

"Obviously." Alex joked, taking Henry's hand to move inside, followed by their agents a few meters back. 

Chapter Text

The boys slept only when it was nearly morning, when Cash knocked on their door, to let them know everything was ready. They both looked like they were hangover, but they managed to get inside the car and avoid the millions of photographers that had gathered outside the hotel, without giving any more statements regarding their relationship. 

Their hands tangled together was enough of a statement. A statement that their relationship was strong, stronger than any fight, any criminal that would come their way. 

Henry claimed he would only rest his eyes, but not even an hour during the flight, he was snoring softly on Alex's side, inside the small private airplane. Which on the positive scenario was good, because Ellen had 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 sent him the passwords for his social media accounts and 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 he could see everything he was missing while on house arrest. 

He typed his name first, curious about the newest articles about him, about the injury, his relationship, anything... 

The first one he found was with a picture of him and Henry outside of the hotel. 

𝘉𝘢𝘤𝘬 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳? 𝘍𝘚𝘖𝘛𝘜𝘚 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻 𝘰𝘯 𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘴 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘏𝘙𝘏 𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺, 𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘬𝘴 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘳𝘶𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘶𝘱. 

Another article then. A picture from a different angle, still with the two kissing. 

𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘵𝘸𝘦𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘍𝘚𝘖𝘛𝘜𝘚 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘌𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘶𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 (𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘭𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦). 

𝘓𝘪𝘱 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘢𝘭: 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 #𝘍𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘥 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘱𝘶𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘤 𝘬𝘪𝘴𝘴. 

He continued scrolling down the articles, surprised once more with how quick the press could be. But maybe he overdid it with scrolling, cause next thing he found was an article from Christmas, a few days after he was released from the hospital. 

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻? 𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘍𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘍𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸. 

𝘐𝘴 𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥? 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘭𝘨𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘦. 

𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘈𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘱𝘰𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘤𝘴? 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘵𝘩 𝘣𝘦𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘪𝘥𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘤𝘬𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥. 

Alex scoffed as he shoved the newly prescribed pills down his throat with some water. Good. If that article knew everything, maybe they should tell him too. He really struggled to understand why a few things happened anyway. 

Actually, one of the things that didn't make sense was him dating Henry. But now, with the blonde's head on his shoulder, feeling peaceful and content, Alex knew he was wrong. 

This was the only thing that made sense. 

His fingers began typing again before he even acknowledged it. 

𝘈𝘭𝘦𝘹 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘋𝘪𝘢𝘻 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘗𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺 𝘌𝘮𝘢𝘪𝘭𝘴. 

Since he never got the time to read the copy Henry left him back home, he would read them online. 

When Henry woke up, it was after a good three hours into the flight, and his was more surprised to find Alex staring blankly at the space in front of him, phone still in hand. 

"Alex?" He yawned, before he locked eyes with the article he was reading. He had read it himself of course, a long time ago and he swore he could recognize it everywhere. 

"You read the emails." He said with a gulp. Alex managed to nod, as he turned his gaze on him. 

His eyes were red and teary. Henry suspected they had been that way for a while. 

"Alex--"

"All that love for me to just...go and fucking forget everything--"

"Hey, you couldn't have known, how is any of this your fault?" Henry cupped his face, forcing him to look at him. 

"After I found you, I was sure I didn't need to remember anything. That we would build new memories together."

"We will, sweetheart. We will."

"But all these things we talk about in these emails... Or the things we did... I feel like I will miss them--"

"I will remind you everything you need... I remember it all too well." 

"How can you miss something you barely remember?" Alex sobbed out and Henry would answer, but an agent walked inside and Henry was forced to leave the brunette's face. Alex lowered his gaze to the floor to hide his eyes. 

"Can you give us a second? Thank you." Henry said and the guy immediately walked out. He got the chance to caress Alex's hair out of his face. 

"Love..." 

"You are perfect, you know that?" Alex wiped the tears from his eyes. "And I'm standing here, crying about things I can't control in front of people..." 

"We can always blame the new meds." Henry joked and Alex choked a laugh. 

"Sorry that it took me so long to see everything you did for me." The brunette raised his head to face him and pushed up a smile. Henry opened his arms wide and Alex took this as an invite to stand and sit on his lap, to be enveloped in his hug. 

"I love you Henry." 

"I love you more, love." He gave him a kiss on the head as he traced his side. "Are these pills better than the ones you were taking before?" 

"Worse. Makes my head hurt. But I'm happy you are here." 

"Always." Henry smiled. "Do you think you can sleep for a while? I'm pretty sure we won't get any sleep when we arrive. Our nieces won't let their favorite uncle--" The blonde paused, as if saying something wrong. It took Alex a while to realize.

"I meant ehm...my nieces. I'm sorry--" 

"Henry...you said it correctly. Our nieces." Alex stroked his cheek lovingly. "You better tell me everything about them though. I can't let Penelope think her uncle forgot her." 

"I wouldn't dream it. But do sleep for a while. We have around five hours of flight left." Henry said softly. "And by the time we return, I'm pretty sure these assholes will have confessed."

"I'm not that positive. I just wish for the pills to start doing something instead of making me dizzy."

"Darling, I live in a world where we were allowed to date and love each other not once, but twice. Do you really think we ran out of miracles?" Henry kissed him on the lips twice, before Alex leaned for a third kiss, this time more passionate. 

Miracles? Henry made a wish, not a miracle. To find whoever hurt Alex and hurt them however he could. 

Philip didn't even knock the door on the way to his grandma's office. He walked past the assistant claiming the queen was busy and got in, without asking. Mary raised her eyebrow suspiciously. 

"I hope it's important, Philip. I am preparing for a council." 

"Henry and the American is coming to England and I only learned it this morning." 

"I've known since yesterday. Catherine spoke with Henry last night and she allowed him."

"Allow me to rephrase that. The same American who we almost--"

"Close the door." Mary ordered coldly as her grandson complied. "If we are to have conversations like this, you have to make sure they are done in my office with the doors closed. Understood?"

Philip sighed. "I don't know how you are so calm. The whole mission was a fiasco! You read my father's journal with me. This ring was supposed to have a password engraved that would lead us to his most valuable belongings, belongings that we haven't found yet, so it's useless... Don't get me started on how we ruined the first son." 

"The first son ruined this, not the opposite. As for the ring, it is to the monarchy's hands now. That and whatever secrets it might hide. You know it that Arthur was never a fan of the royal family. And if he had gathered clues during his stay in the palace, clues that might bring us down, I would never 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 trust them with that uncultured pig. Especially after his fight with Henry. Who could tell us that he wouldn't use them to blackmail us?"

"But now they are back together. And we are again in danger."

"Oh Philip, haven't you heard? Alex won't remember again. And for how long will Henry continue to tolerate him, simple as he is? Even if he ever remembers a small detail, anything...who would Henry believe? His family? Or someone brain damaged?" 

Philip nodded, as he tightened his tie again. Sweat had begun running down his forehead a while ago. 

"Go prepare yourself for the guests. And wear your best smile, before you betray us yourself."

"Of course grandma." The man was ready to leave but he was stopped by Mary standing up. 

"Philip." He turned to see her. "One day after me, you will rule. And rulers sometimes have to think before everyone else, 𝘧𝘰𝘳 everyone else. No matter the consequences."

"No matter the consequences." Philip repeated before walking out. 

Maybe the old Alex had his fair share of stays in the palace (both happy and sad), but the new Alex was watching the huge building in front of him with round eyes, wondering how exactly did he ever manage to become accustomed to a place like this. 

"All good?" Henry handed their suitcases to an assistant before coming next to Alex to caress his back. 

"Was it always the palace that...big?" 

"Oh yes...and intolerable at times. Nothing beats brownstone."

"Nothing beats brownstone." Alex agreed. "Is it too late to go back--"

"Uncle Alex! Uncle Henry!" Penelope appeared running down the stairs, not slowing down until she was in the entrance, and basically climbing on Alex to hug him. The brunette was quick to catch her. 

"Hello! How are you Penelope?" 

"Good. I missed you." Penelope pouted. "Why didn't you come with uncle Henry last time? You always visit when he visits!" 

"I...I had--"

"I told you, darling. Uncle Alex had work to do back in America." Henry smiled at her. "But he's here now."

"Yes and Henry was telling me you liked Star Wars."

"I do. But...didn't you know? You promised to watch with me."

"I...did." 

"Did my dad tell you not to? He always ruins the fun."

 "Penelope, how about you go to greet David and get him out of the car? To stretch his legs after the trip?" 

Penelope considered it for a small second before untangling herself from Alex's arms and running towards the car. 

"She doesn't know. I'm so sorry."

"It's not her fault. It's okay--"

"Henry? Alex! Oh my boys..." Catherine appeared from the same stairs her granddaughter came, only slower. She gave Henry a hug and a kiss before moving to cup Alex's face. 

"How are you, my dear?" 

"A bit dizzy from the trip, but otherwise all good." 

"Oh...Would you like to rest for a while, sweetheart? Henry, why did you tell me sooner? I'd have a doctor on standby already--"

"Miss- Ma'am..."

"Call me Catherine."

"Catherine, it's alright. I get these all the time."

"Yes. Alex will have a nice cup of tea and he will be jolly good in no time." 

"Did you just say a nice cup of tea and Alex in the same sentence?" Alex furrowed his brows and Henry laughed. 

Penelope passed them by, holding the beagle who was licking her face, and got inside, Catherine following her soon after, along with the couple. 

"Wait until you see my drawings, uncle Alex!" 

"Oh, that piece of propaganda where Alex is taller than me?" The girl giggled. "Scandalous! Preposterous!"

"I'm convinced half of the words you are using don't exist." Alex nudged Penelope playfully. "He's just a sore loser, your uncle."

"Excuse you!" Catherine laughed with her son's tone, as she petted David, who ended up free on the floor. 

"Can't wait to tell aunt Bea you are here!" Penelope said before rushing up the same stairs, almost falling over once in the round corner. 

"You will stay for days?" 

"If it's not much." 

"Nonsense. It will never be too much to see my kids." Catherine smiled at them both. "I wanted to come to America to visit, Alex, but Henry advised me you needed space." 

"Yeah, I...these last months have been tough. For both of us." 

"It's going to be alright. Trust me, you will remember in no--"

"Mum." Henry tried to stop her, but Alex just squeezed his fingers. 

"I won't remember, Catherine." Alex smiled sadly. "That's what the doctor said. He prescribed me new pills but he's certain." 

"Darling..." Catherine furrowed her eyebrows. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay. Henry helps." Alex's eyes lit up with mischief. "Most of the time. When he doesn't correct me about my vocabulary."

Henry gasped dramatically. "I cannot believe you!" 

While the blonde moved first, trying to act betrayed and ignoring the laughter coming behind him, Catherine touched Alex's hand. 

"You will be safe here. I prepared you a room here so you can be next to us, but if it's too much and you prefer to go to Kensington..."

"It's alright. Truly." Alex stopped. "I'm gonna call my mom real quick to tell her we are here."

"Want me to wait for you?" Henry asked, a few steps above them. 

"Just go and settle, Wales." Alex gave Catherine a last look. "I'll come find you when I'm done." 

Alex took out his phone then and when he raised his head again, the two had disappeared from the stairway. 

"Hey, sugar. All good?"

"Yes, we just arrived at the palace." 

"Great. Call me if you need anything, okay?" 

"Okay. Love you."

"Love you too, baby." 

Alex took a deep breath when he hung up and just took a moment to process everything he was seeing. All the paintings on the walls, the expensive furniture, the vases with the flowers, the staircase he was standing upon... 

He had just placed his phone in his pocket and turned around to resume climbing up the stairs when he turned and a sudden wave of nausea hit him all at once. He gripped the railing with all his power to keep himself steady, as his vision momentarily blurred. 

𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘢𝘧𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘬𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴! 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦! 

Alex snapped his eyes open despite the pain piercing his head. What just happened? And why did he feel... The ache? 

𝘐 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴. 

The voice echoed in his head so loudly Alex wanted to flinch. History? Supportive family? 

Did they have a fight with Henry? Was it the same fight they had before he left or not? 

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐, 𝘸𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘴, another voice said. 𝘞𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘥 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘢𝘪𝘳 𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘶𝘣𝘭𝘪𝘤 𝘦𝘺𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘦 𝘥𝘰 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘯, 𝘸𝘦 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘭𝘥 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘴. 𝘈𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦𝘴...𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘬 𝘶𝘱. 𝘋𝘪𝘷𝘰𝘳𝘤𝘦. 

Alex's grip on the railing had become impossibly tighter now. His heart was bouncing hard, but the worst was the feeling of hurt. Hurt. Hurt on his heart, hurt on his mind, it just hurt. 

𝘐 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯...𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳...

Who told him that? It couldn't be Henry, right? Not simply because it was an awful thing to say, but because Alex never thought Henry could be so unnecessary cruel. 

He told him he was not part of his family though... 

Yes, when he snapped. But this? This was not just snapping, this was hate. Pure hate. 

Henry could never treat him like that. Alex was sure. 

He buried the nails of his other hand to his palm, trying to ground himself, to snap out of it, or at least remember that voice. 

Maybe it was a dream. He was feeling weirdly all morning, maybe these weren't even memories. 

𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘯. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

Alex stopped. Stopped moving, stopped pressing, stopped shaking. 

Was that the voice of the one criminal who--

"There you are. I began thinking you got lost in here, but in reality you didn't even try to." Henry was heard and then footsteps, approaching. 

Alex had the strength to raise his head only when Henry was at arm's length. 

"Alex?" His smile dropped. "All good, love?" 

"I..." In his mind he was once here with Henry...

And once on the floor, blood coming out of his head and two figures above studying him. 

𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘯. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

"Alex?"

𝘍𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘯. 

"Alex?"

𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

"Darling, you are worrying me." 

The second he snapped out of it, Henry had his hands on his biceps, squeezing tightly, enough to bring some warmth and comfort on Alex's frozen body. He raised his hand then to wipe the...was that tears? When did he start crying? 

"Henry..."

"There you are. I had began worrying. Can you tell me five things you can see?" 

"Henry, I'm better, I..." His voice came out shaky. 

"I know, love. Can you do me the favour anyway? Let's sit here." Henry urged him to sit on the stairs, with him beside him. "Can you tell me five things you can see?" 

"Henry--"

"Please." He begged. "For me."

Alex sighed. "I can see the stairs. I can see the carpet, that ridiculous vase over there..." 

"It's baroque." Henry said with jest and kissed his curls. "But go on if you can." 

"My...my shoes." He turned to the blonde. "And you." 

Henry kissed his forehead and hummed. "Four things you can touch." 

"You again." Alex laid back on his arms. "The stairs. The railing. And the carpet." 

"Three things you can smell." 

"Henry..." 

"For me. I know you'll be alright. I just want to be sure." Henry smiled. "Can you tell me?" 

"Whatever air freshener you use in here. Your cologne. And mine." 

"Two things you can hear?" 

𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘯. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

"Your voice I'd say." Alex gulped. "And mine."

"And one thing you can taste?" 

"You?" Alex suggested and who was Henry to deny him. He gave him a small kiss on the lips, savouring the sweetness of his scent mixed with his cinnamon coffee before he drew back and pressing their foreheads together. 

"You did great. Absolutely great, love." 

"I don't know what happened. I was just coming up the stairs, I felt nauseous and I kept hearing all these voices in my head I couldn't quite figure." 

"Did something stress you? We don't have to go to the tea gathering if you don't want to."

"No, it's not that." Alex shook his head. "I don't think it's the place." 

"If you don't like it, we can always go stay in Kensington. It has security as well. Actually, I think this will be preferable, huh?" 

"Fine. Okay." Alex made a move to stand up, holding his head as if to check it was still stitched shut. He traced the scar there, the stitches had been removed a long time ago, and then he checked his hand for any sign of blood. He found none and he couldn't help but sigh with relief. He was alive. He was dead, with the two men standing above--

𝘚𝘩𝘶𝘵 𝘶𝘱. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳? The voice of his assassin echoed in his head. 

Hear what? 

"Alex come on, love. Let's go up these stairs. Hold the railing." Henry passed an arm around his waist, holding one of Alex's hands with his other. 

And Alex, if he wasn't so busy trying to calm down, ground his breathing and go up the stairs the same time, would focus on the conversation more.

What they didn't want him to hear? 

𝘚𝘩𝘶𝘵 𝘶𝘱. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳? 

𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘯. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

𝘚𝘩𝘶𝘵 𝘶𝘱. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳? 

𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘯. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨. 

"Alexander." The queen's voice woke him from his daydreaming. The woman had just entered the room and from what Alex had realized, Catherine, Bea and Henry had all turned to acknowledge her. 

"Hello?" He said, half certain whether to bow or continue sitting like the others did. 

"I hope you are better now. I have been learning your news discreetly all this time." 

"Thank you, I guess." Alex half mumbled and Catherine stretched to touch his hand. 

"You are part of the family, darling. There's no need." She accepted the cup her daughter offered her. Bea then moved to Alex, who was sitting between Catherine and Henry and lastly Henry. 

The queen took her own cup from the table in the corner, before going to sit across the couple, all by herself. 

"Where's Philip? I haven't seen him at all since we came." Henry asked, taking a small sip. 

"Ah, don't mind him. They had a doctor's appointment for Elizabeth and they both requested to be there. He should be here, ah! There he is!" Mary said as the doors opened wide and Philip showed up, frame smaller than usual. Martha was next to him, smiling. 

"Come on in..." Mary gave them some space so they can sit beside her. 

"How are you Henry? Alex?" Martha hugged them both before moving next to her grandma in law. Philip offered his brother a quick hug. 

"We're alright. How are you two?" 

"Everything is perfect." Philip didn't make eye contact for long before moving to Alex. He gave him an awkward, half hug before he joined his wife. 

Henry made a mental note to ask him if he was alright later. Having two kids under five and having the weight of the throne on your shoulders shouldn't have been an easy thing. 

"I almost thought you didn't want to see us. You never miss tea time or family gatherings." Henry attempted to joke, but only Martha laughed. 

"No, I... I had missed you. It was just that the doctor and everything today...it was too much."

"Well maybe next time you can come to America. We will be better hosts than the last time you came, won't we Alex?"

"The last time?"

"Oh, Henry...help him out a bit." Mary said. "You see, Alexander, Philip had come over to visit when you and Henry were apart."

"That explains it." Alex shook his head. All the previous thoughts had disappeared and he caught himself thinking how he could bring them back. 

"Yes. And now that I remembered it!" Henry said. "You wanted to tell me something, didn't you? About a ring--"

"Oh, our father's ring. Doesn't matter, I just got nostalgic--"

"We lost it when the supposed robbers came in." Henry's look darkened and Alex caressed his hand. 

"It doesn't matter, Henry. What matters is for you two to be fine." Catherine said and turned to her firstborn. "Why didn't you tell me, Philip? I have kept several of your father's belongings. I believe you had too."

"Enough about that. All these are earthly possessions. All that matters is for Alexander to heal."

"Thanks." Alex smiled before realizing that, during all that time, he was only sipping to avoid being asked questions. His tea had long finished and an empty cup was staring back at him. 

Alex didn't understand why the old Alex didn't like them. Why he got into a fight with Henry in the first place. Why Henry had told him that he wasn't raised by a loving and supportive family. 

They seemed pretty supportive and loving now. 

-𝘗𝘦𝘳𝘬𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘳𝘰𝘺𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺, Henry had said to him when they first started hanging out after the accident.

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘬 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩. 

-𝘖𝘶𝘤𝘩... 𝘍𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘺𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵--

-𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘶𝘨𝘢𝘳, 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘦? 𝘠𝘦𝘢𝘩, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵... 

Not always? 

His mom was supportive, Bea as well. In the past, Philip had some issues, same as Mary. 

Alex mumbled an excuse to stand up to take some more tea, while the others were busy talking about Penelope's new school. 

His mind was running faster than his legs, from one situation to the other, from one person to the other, from one conversation to another... 

𝘚𝘶𝘨𝘢𝘳, 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘦? 𝘠𝘦𝘢𝘩, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵, said Henry. 

𝘐 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯...𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, said a voice that sounded a lot like...Philip's? Was it even Philip? And when did he say that? 

With shaky hands, Alex poured himself some water. Luckily no one seemed to pay him any mind while the thoughts kept tormenting his brain. 

𝘚𝘩𝘶𝘵 𝘶𝘱. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳?, said the assassin. 

𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘯. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨, said the other assassin. 

𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦, said Henry. 

𝘚𝘩𝘶𝘵 𝘶𝘱. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘩𝘪𝘮 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳?, said the assassin. 

𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, said Philip. 

𝘍𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘴𝘱𝘰𝘬𝘦 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘮 𝘺𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘥𝘢𝘺 𝘐 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘵...said Alex. 

𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘯𝘢𝘮𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘦𝘯𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘰 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳, said Philip. 

𝘏𝘦'𝘴 𝘧𝘶𝘤𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘥𝘦𝘢𝘥, 𝘮𝘢𝘯. 𝘏𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨, said the assassin. 

𝘚𝘶𝘨𝘢𝘳, 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘦? 𝘠𝘦𝘢𝘩, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵, said Henry. 

𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐, 𝘸𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘵𝘩 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘴, said Philip. 

𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘴𝘯'𝘵 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘴𝘶𝘱𝘱𝘰𝘳𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦, said Henry. 

𝘗𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘱 𝘸𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘺, said the assassin. 

𝘗𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘪𝘱? 

No...no, no, no... Why is Philip's name in here. He must've confused his trail of thoughts because Philip--

𝘞𝘢𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘨𝘢𝘳, 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘯𝘪𝘤𝘦? 𝘠𝘦𝘢𝘩, 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵, Henry's voice said like a mock. 

And the glass from Alex's hands fell to the floor. 

Chapter Text

Alex heard the gasps, coming from the people behind him, but he didn't bring himself to turn or explain. He just stood there. Looking at the wall. The tray with the spare cups. His hand, still floating, holding no glass... 

The glass then...on the floor, surrounding his feet, water creating a mess on the wooden surface. 

"Alex?" He heard then, but again he didn't respond. He heard footsteps, stressed and anxious and his mind wanted to let Henry know he was alright, but his body didn't cooperate. In fact, it preferred to stay frozen, only allowing his hand to move on the back of his head, where the stitches used to be. 

Where the trauma used to be. 

"Alex?" Henry repeated and to the brunette's surprise, he had reached him then, holding him in place, as if he was afraid he would collapse. 

How could he explain? How could he--

But they were right there, weren't they? And Henry was there, and Alex was there, and Catherine, and Bea and...did Martha know? Did the queen? 

"Alex, what's going on, love?" Henry asked more gentle than before, holding him still upright. Alex didn't speak. Just turned around, hand still clutching his head. 

And if he wasn't sure before, the moment he locked eyes with Philip, he was. 

"It was you." He said with a shaky breath. Everyone turned to where Alex was staring to find the crown prince frozen, mouth half open. 

The queen from beside him huffed a laugh. "Oh Alexander, poor thing, he must be exhausted by trying to absorb all these new information. Be not afraid, dear. It's just Philip. Henry's very much adored brother." 

"Alex, are you tired? We can--"

"𝘏𝘦 hired the assassins." Alex yelled, making everyone stop, even Henry somehow became more pale. Only the queen's murderous eyes were still on him. Philip had lowered his head down immediately. 

"He did what?" Henry stuttered, a fear behind his eyes. 

"Philip--"

"Alexander, you are our guest and we expect you to be on your best behavior. We understand that what you have been through has taken its toll on you, but I won't allow you to insult anyone of Henry's family like that..." Mary spoke before her daughter did. Bea and Martha were just sitting there, dumbfounded. As for Henry and Alex, they only exchanged a quick, pained look. 

𝘉𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦, Alex's eyes were pleading. 

Henry's eyes were cold and the answer wasn't clear. 

Mary cleared her throat. "I'd advise you to go to your rooms and rest. Henry is of course welcome to stay--"

"Why aren't you talking, Philip?" Henry muttered slowly, taking his time pronouncing every syllable, in a deep voice Alex hadn't heard before. The two brothers locked eyes then, and the next second, Philip was on his feet. 

"Philip, what is Alex--"

"Let them, Martha." The queen stopped her. "Philip, you don't owe anyone anything. You don't have to apologize for mister Claremont Diaz's delusions."

"Why didn't he accuse me then?" Bea said, voice trembling. "If he's delusional, why blame Philip specifically--"

"Bea, in this conversation your contribution is not welcome--"

"Then 𝘐 will ask, mother." Catherine spat out coldly and stared at her firstborn. "Did you do it?" 

She got no response. Her two sons were still looking at each other. 

"Tell me!" She screamed, making everyone flinch. Although Alex wanted someone, anyone to believe him, he couldn't help but ache at the mother's despair. "For God's sake Philip, say something!"

"What is there to say?" Mary shouted back. "Everyone is accusing him of something, when Alexander's brain has been altered after the accident--"

"If I wasn't so stunned, I'd accuse you of being in this too, grandma." Henry said quietly, yet everyone heard. "Protecting Philip before he even has the chance to protect himself."

Alex would speak. He would say something because he was losing Henry's trust, for that he was sure. The grip on his arm had turned cold by now. 

And Henry even colder. Not even sparing him a glance... 

Alex was sure he had already lost him. 

"This is the correct thing to do, Henry. To protect your family when they cannot protect themselves."

Henry's hand left him then. Alex had missed his touch already. 

"I believe you are right with this one." Henry's eyes were falling once at Mary, once at Philip. 

"I knew you'd see it from my point of view. I suggest we leave mister Claremont Diaz to rest, while we--"

"I agreed with you before but I think I fail to understand this, grandma." Henry's eyes fell on hers, intimidating and fearless. 

"What is there more to understand?" Philip found his voice but by bit, approaching the couple with short steps. "Alexander has insulted me in my own home. Accused me of something in front of my family and I've been kind enough not to kick him out. But now, I am afraid it's time for you to have a private talk with your family, Henry." 

Alex had stopped looking at Henry for a while now, so his surprise was bigger when he felt a hand, sliding into his own. Looking up, he found Henry's eyes looking back at him. 

"Alex is my family." He said firmly, not breaking eye contact. 

𝘐 𝘣𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘦𝘷𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶, his eyes finally responded. 

"Henry, still you cannot possibly believe--" 

"The brain damaged over you?" Henry said sarcastically. "I still haven't decided whether your attitude makes you simply look really entitled... Or simply really guilty."

The queen scoffed. "Henry, you will hear us whether you want or not. Philip, call the guards to escort mister Claremont Diaz out." 

Henry was only watching his brother carefully, eyes throwing daggers. It was as if Philip's confidence had disappeared again in front of the blonde's murderous gaze. 

"Philip--"

"This is between the two of us." Henry yelled. "Did you do it?"

"Haz--"

"Tell me!"

"You know I--"

"Tell me!"

"Remember I'm your brother--"

"Fucking. Tell. Me!"

"Philip, you don't have to admit--"

"I did!" Philip's voice cut their grandma short. Their mother stood up then. 

"Philip you did what--"

Henry's fist locked with his brother's left cheek before he managed to touch Alex. Philip made a step back then while stumbling, and had to grab a cushion, before ending up on the floor. Everyone gasped and the queen and Martha stood up from their seats. No one dared to approach though, apart from Catherine. She gave her firstborn a help to stand. 

Philip coughed again and again. "Henry--" 

"Don't bother."

"I'm sorry."

"Fuck off." Henry opened the door with rage on his movements, before turning to Alex. His gaze somehow softened. 

"Let's go, love." 

They were barely out of the door when Henry stopped. 

"Alex's mother will find out about this the second we will walk out. In case you think of repeating something like that." And just with that they were gone. 

They went to Kensington after that; they barely spoke for the ride there, mostly because Alex was busy talking to his mother, a conversation that involved some tears and some distressed talking over the phone and Henry was busy talking to his sister, who apparently left with an enraged Martha, while Catherine was still talking to the two.

She said something about Martha taking the kids and going to her family's manor for a few days, while Catherine and her also prepared to leave. Henry didn't manage to ask where to, because the next second the driver was opening the doors and they were there, finally on Henry's old house. 

They walked to the entrance with David on their feet, the two not managing to keep eye contact, but still holding hands. The prince didn't know whether Alex wouldn't say anything, if he was angry at Henry as well, or if he would, the moment they stayed alone. 

Turns out he didn't need to wonder for long. The moment the door closed behind them, and they were finally away, just them, Alex fell on his arms, not leaving an inch between them. 

Needless to say Henry hugged him back with all his force. 

"Thank you for believing me." The brunette muttered on his shoulder. Henry only gave him a kiss on the neck, clutching him tightly. 

"I'm sorry I didn't do it sooner." Henry's voice broke mid sentence. This meant Alex was right. When he was joking about his grandma assassinating him, hating him with all her power, that meant he was right. And she convinced Philip to do her bidding. 

It was worse than Alex joked about after all. 

"God, I'm so sorry Alex..." Henry let out a sob, forcing Alex to make a step back to untangle from him. The attempt was in vain though, for Henry had no plans of letting go. 

"Forgive me..." Henry started falling down then, still having his arms wrapped around Alex. He was on his knees, hugging his waist by now and still, he didn't want to let go. 

God, he would lose him. He would lose him because of the family that Henry used to defend. 

"Henry, hey..." Alex stroked his hair back carefully. "You didn't know, how could you know?" 

"But it makes sense, doesn't it?" Henry stood up, untying his tie. "Philip asks me about the ring, I leave the house, he comes to America unannounced for the first time, he talks to you...I don't know what he said, but--"

"I know." Alex hesitated. "But it doesn't really matter."

"Tell me. Your mother might already be inside a plane and it would be better if we know everything. So we can be ready for tomorrow." 

Alex looked around and for a moment Henry didn't get it. But then he saw a servant coming down the stairs. 

"Could you clear this part of the castle of everyone? Thank you."

"But...the orders--"

"This is bigger than the orders. Do as you are told." Henry said, grabbing Alex's hand to lead him upstairs, to his room. He locked behind him, making sure no one else was on the way. 

"Mom hired more security. They will be here before her. I don't trust anyone I don't know right now."

Henry nodded. "Okay. We will do whatever makes you happy. Do you want me to bring only people you know? I will even call Amy on her honeymoon. Or the blonde guy with the kids."

"Shawn."

"That one."

Alex smiled, his arms encircling Henry's neck. 

"Will you tell me what Philip said now?"

Alex sighed. "He said that people break up and I should know that better than anyone. With the history my name carries. I must've told him something then because he said I had to be grateful we broke up now and not when we'd be married." 

"That...bastard." Henry hit the door with his fist, tears of anger leaving his eyes. "He had no right to say that. Not when he knew nothing about you. Not when we were planning to get married--"

"We were?" Alex stopped. 

"We...had a talk. And we said we were ready, but nothing specific yet." Henry pulled his hair back. "I can't believe I didn't mention it."

"Well, to be honest, you had many things in your mind. And I speculated it anyway." 

"You did?" 

"We were living together. We fell in love not once, but twice. I felt like marriage would be in our plans." Alex raised his shoulders. "Is it too bad?" 

Henry let out a breath, before falling back to his arms, breathing him in. 

They really went inside the lion's den. And the worse, Henry they both knew nothing. 

And that terrified him. 

So he just hugged him tighter. 

Catherine came to Kensington an hour later, with Bea. She didn't say much, apart from taking Alex and Henry into a bone crushing hug, but her red eyes were enough of a confirmation that the aftermath, after the couple left, was nasty. 

Henry received two phone calls while the rest were upstairs, one from Shaan, who was also on their way with Zahra, and one from Alex's father, who was on a meeting when Alex called him and learned the news a bit late. 

𝘛𝘢𝘬𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘪𝘮, he pleaded before hanging up, when he was ready to board. And Henry wouldn't have it any other way. 

By the time he returned upstairs, Catherine was walking out of Henry's bedroom and she immediately gestured him to not talk when she saw him. 

"Alex finally slept." The mother whispered, hugging herself. "God knows how ashamed I am..." 

Henry gave her a quick hug. Not that it did much anyway. 

"His parents, Shaan, Zahra, his sister and his best friend are on their way. Percy will probably do the same, if he hasn't already."

"How do you feel?" Catherine stroked his arm. 

"Betrayed. But mostly angry." 

"Mary knew. She was as behind this as Philip."

"I figured...All of you were shocked, but she was the only one who defended Philip without hearing anything Alex said." Henry bit his lip. "Bea?" 

"On her room. Texting June." 

"And Martha?"

"She didn't know. She left to go to her parents with the girls." Catherine's eyes darkened. "I am afraid she will ask for a divorce." 

"I'm only sorry for the girls. They are young and didn't deserve to get inside all the mess. And I'm sorry for Martha." Henry crossed his arms, his eyebrows furrowed. 

"But it's not your fault. None of this." Catherine said. "This is not the Philip I love. I expected this from my mother but him? I don't know what...I did different with the way I raised him in order for him to be so power hungry, but I cannot let it be that way." The woman walked slowly towards the stairs, leaving Henry behind. 

"Mom?"

"Yes honey."

"You were a good mom." Henry stuck his chin out, biting the inside of his cheek. 

He didn't get a response, but he knew she listened. And if he knew her even in the slightest, he would know she had smiled, before going to Bea's room. 

Alex was indeed on his side, fast asleep when Henry entered. He was curled up in a ball, with David resting on the feet of the bed and the blonde didn't make any kind of noise, not even when he changed clothes and laid next to him on the bed. However, when he encircled his waist from behind, Alex immediately got startled and shot his eyes open. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's me."

"You scared me." Alex let out a breath, but relaxed back inside Henry's arms anyway. 

"I didn't mean to." The prince kissed his neck lovingly. "Your parents are on their way. Your whole family is on their way actually." 

"Getting ready to invade Britain?" Alex joked, but Henry could spot the relief on his voice. 

"The only American invasion in Britain I will ever be happy for." Henry tried to joke, but he was too tired. Tomorrow would be a long day. A day that would involve yelling, tears, some remarks and side eyes and even, why not? An international scandal. 

For now Henry settled by hugging Alex a bit tighter. 

Ellen was there with Leo, June and Nora first thing in the morning, Zahra and Shaan following soon after. Oscar arrived from Texas two hours later, from the airport straight to his son's arms. They wouldn't go anywhere without him anyway. 

Eventually, for the much dreaded conversation, they decided to all go, but for Leo, June, Nora and Bea to stay outside of the room. The presence of Alex's parents would be justified, Catherine's as well, Zahra preferred to be there and stay quiet than accompany the others outside and Shaan was still Henry's assistant. 

It was nine a.m. when they reached the room where the talking would take place. Philip (with a covered bruise below his eye, Henry noted) was sitting next to his grandmother, with two more people of the Royal council by their side, Martha too. Alex sat across them, with Henry on his one side and his mother to the other. His father preferred an armchair, and Zahra and Shaan sat in chairs, on the other side of the room. 

"I assume you understand that after today--"

"A lot of NDAs will be needed?" Ellen asked, a hint of sarcasm in her voice. "Did you think about NDAs when you hired--"

"Mom." Alex cleared his throat. His head was already aching by little sleep. This conversation was messy enough as it was. They didn't need the yells that soon. 

"Miss Claremont, I understand you are upset--"

"Upset?" Oscar spat out and Ellen eyed the man from the council that dared to speak. 

"I'd be upset if you had spilled coffee in my shirt minutes before a speech. When you try to kill my son...I'm not upset, I'm fucking pissed." 

"Miss Claremont..." Mary said. "It was not our goal to hurt Alexander. It was only to take a family heirloom that meant a lot to us--"

"But Alex got hurt in the process." Henry stopped her. "This doesn't change the outcome." 

"Also the reason you wanted it was far from sentimental value, mother." Catherine spoke. 

"Alright then... Miss Claremont, let's be honest here for a while. If you had found out that your son has something important on his hands, something that could be the end of your career, or cause a scandal and he leaves it with his...boyfriend after their separation, not on good terms I might say... Wouldn't you want to have it? Why risk anyone blackmailing you? Wouldn't you do the same if it came to choose between Henry and your family--"

"Henry is in a relationship with my son. Which means he is my family." Ellen gave a small smile at Henry. 

"And even if that changed one day, our feelings towards him won't change. Because that's what family does." Oscar said. "Also, I would be extremely careful. Because in your scenarios you are saying that Alex would blackmail Henry if given the choice."

Philip was ready to speak, but one gesture from Mary was enough. 

"You are right. Mr. Claremont Diaz, you have our sincere apologies. We have created a plan going forward, so both sides will be left satisfied." She nodded at her assistant, who opened her files. 

"Mr. Henry George Edward James Fox Mountchristen Windsor and Mr. Alexander Gabriel Claremont Diaz will be forever welcome on her Majesty's the Queen's palace and all the properties belonging to her and his Royal Highness' Prince Philip's manor and all the properties that won't be left with his wife, Martha, after their divorce. Also--"

"What more?" Henry cut her short. Everyone turned to look at him. 

"We are not done, Henry." Mary said. 

"But it feels like you were. Let me guess what is next...welcoming us in the family? Forcing us to meet all together like we are a parade and call that bonding? Showing the world Alex and the royal family have a splendid relationship? Or even put him in your will?"

"I don't think you understand what we are offering you."

"I think he does. That's why he says that." Alex finally spoke. "You ruined my life, you understand that? It doesn't matter if Henry and I are back together, or if tomorrow I might remember everything with details. You made me, your grandson, and my parents go through hell for my treatment, and that's just the physical part. And the worst is...what if I never found out? What if I never remembered? Would we continue to hang out all together and I'd never know that you two--" 

"I don't see why we continue this conversation." Mary said. "So let's ask Mr Claremont Diaz. What do you want?"

"I want this to never happen to anyone again. Because this is really fucked up."

The queen nodded. "Understood." 

"But not just that." Henry said, glaring at his grandma. "We had a conversation with Alex yesterday. So what we want...is for you to step down. And give the throne to mum." 

"You cannot be--"

"And after you... Philip leaves his rights to the throne as well."

"Henry, you can't possibly do that." 

"Why not?" Henry raised his eyebrow. On his side, Alex squeezed his fingers reassuringly. 

"And who will be king then?" 

Catherine sighed. "After I reign for the years I have left, I hope your daughter, Penelope will be ready to take over after me. If not..."

"If Philip's daughters just say no, the monarchy will be over. I know Bea doesn't want to take over, Henry as well... You do not have such power in your requests, like to destroy the monarchy."

"If my sister and Philip's and Martha's daughters all say no, which will be unfortunate, but understandable..." Henry squeezed Alex's hand back. "We will reign. But the way we want to. And when the time is right, we will get married and have children, however 𝘸𝘦 wish again."

The queen exhaled, rather loudly. Then she looked at her grandson, who seemed sincere. And fearless, if anything.

"Anything but this."

"Okay..." Henry smirked. "Turn back time then. And go back to that goddamned night, that your people, disguised as robbers, decided to attack our place and our peace and quiet."

"Henry, don't be childish, you know your requests are--"

"Alright then..." Ellen said. "Then we leave police and the FBI to do their work and cause an international incident later which will result in...oh, that's right. Destruction of the monarchy." 

"And destruction of good relationships between the countries." Zahra said from the other side of the room, making everyone turn to her. "I am sorry, but I had to add this."

"On the contrary, Zahra, you did quite well. We can call miss Holleran inside as well. She can tell us the chances of monarchy's destruction in each case." Ellen smirked sarcastically while the queen and Philip, stood dumbfounded. In fact, even Alex looked dumbfounded. 

He always knew his family was freaking badass, but now, taking his side and protecting him like that against the queen of England...made him smile inside. 

Mary cleared her throat. "All those in favour of...me giving up my rights and Philip giving up his..."

Everyone, apart from her and Philip raised their hand. Even the council seemed to agree that this was the only choice. 

"Very well." The woman continued. "You know the protocol. Samantha, you can prepare my speech. Frederick, when everything is done..."

"I do the social media part, yes, your majesty." 

The council prepared to leave the room then, for sure they had a big day ahead of them and Mary followed them afterwards, giving Alex and Henry a quick, but strict look. Martha smiled at the two for a split second because then she was out of the door, Philip rushing to get to her. 

And when June, Bea, Nora and Leo got the chance to get in and learned what happened, Alex had the chance to hug his family as whole. 

They really had won. 

𝗢𝗻𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗵 𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗿

Henry finally opened the lights to the shelter's library after so long. He smiled, spotting everything exactly where he had left them. 

His mother's coronation was a few days ago. The public took the news of his grandma stepping down surprisingly well; they were surprised, but all in all, they seemed quite content with Catherine taking over, fans of her or not, they all considered Mary needed a break from reigning and everything. And who was Henry to tell them otherwise? 

They never found out what the ring contained. Maybe it was an old note, and the ring now had nothing inside, or maybe even the ring knew to whom to reveal its secrets. Catherine gave it back to Henry, along with a hug, when they boarded on the plane to America. 

Alex had told him to take a break, rest after a very long week, but Henry refused. He had left the shelter without a book club, which on his words was 'unbelievable', and on Alex's words 'Henry, you are a huge nerd, you know that?' 

The prince was taking his time enjoying the room it took him so long to create, when he heard a knock on the door. 

Turning around, he saw Alex, leaning against the doorframe with a bakery bag on his hands, smirking. 

"Back on track?"

"I guess." Henry smiled when the man entered the room. "What brings you here? I thought you and Pez had something planned." 

"Yes, but I was done with my classes, I went by a bakery and said...why not bring a doughnut to the second most handsome man in the world? And Pez said since I'm going to you, it doesn't matter."

Henry rolled his eyes fondly as his hands encircled his waist. "What have I done to deserve you?"

"Oh, on the top of my head, whatever comes to my mind, one, you exist. Two, you are perfect on the inside. Three, you are perfect on the outside too. Four, you have a great ass--"

"Do not copy my list, you cretin!" Henry laughed as Alex kissed his neck, then his lips. 

"Do you have time?" 

"In a while the kids will arrive--"

"Ah...sorry, we thought you were alone." Three kids paused at the door, when they saw the couple. Henry untangled from Alex slowly. 

"It's okay. Come on in." 

"How are y'all?"

"Good actually." A boy said, smiling. A few more kids came inside to settle. 

"Did you come to stay, Alex?"

"I just came by to say hi and give Henry his daily dose of me...but why not? I enjoy your company. Whose turn was it to recommend a book?" 

"No one's. We pick ourselves this time." Henry brought one more seat inside for Alex, which the brunette gladly took. He went to sit across Henry, between two kids he remembered from last time.

"We can begin I think." Henry said when everyone were seated. "You remember Alex, obviously. Last time he watched as a guest, this time he watches as an...unexpected guest."

"You hurt my feelings. But it's not entirely true, I have something prepared for today." Alex smirked. "But go on."

And so they went on. And Alex listened to them all, with the same passion as they spoke about books Alex had never read before. It didn't matter. Watching Henry's expression vary from surprise to happiness and back, with the side of his eye, was enough. 

"Alright, as I can see the time is running out already. Susan, next Friday is your birthday, so that means is your turn to pick a book. You can send me an email, so I start to equip our library, alright?" 

"I haven't presented my book yet." Alex stopped them all. 

Henry raised his eyebrow. "You have read a book?"

"Why the sass?"

"I don't remember seeing you reading anything. Or informing me, oh Henry, I will come by the shelter because I find the book club really interesting." 

"You're exaggerating now. And yes, I did read."

"You read a book? Secretly from me?"

"Yes." Everyone laughed. They deep down loved their banters. 

"Which book then?" 

"The Song of Achilles. Turns out it was quite interesting." Alex watched as everyone remained silent. "Oh, so now nobody speaks? Okay. I suppose I'll go ahead. Peter, remind me what I should talk about."

"What you liked, at first. Then maybe a quote, something that touched you." Said the boy on his right side. 

"I liked how it portrayed a relationship that was doomed. It was doomed from the beginning, but by the time Achilles and Patroclus truly realized it, it was late. But then, against the world, their love was strong enough and it went against the fates themselves." Alex bit his lower lip. "As you know I had an accident a few months back. I lost quite a few memories, took a toll on my life. And then this man..." He pointed at Henry, smiling. "He appeared one day, he gave me hope where I found nothing, had the audacity to love me exactly how I was, and made my life so better, in every damn way. Sorry for cursing." Alex blinked a few times, before smiling wider. "That's it. That's why I liked this book." 

"You have to say a favorite quote." Henry spoke voice shakily, and judging from his eyes, Alex's confession almost made him cry.

"Right. How did it go? Let's see. It was one I deeply related with, in all my fight trying to remember." Alex pretended to think about this. "I could recognize him by touch alone, by smell. I'd know him by the way his breaths came and his feet struck the earth. I would know him blind, at the end of the world... This is Henry for me." Alex smiled and now he could see a tear slipping down the prince's cheek. "This is the love I have for him. Just like that." 

For a second they all stayed silent. Then Bradley started clapping and everyone went along with it, a girl even crying with Alex's words. The brunette only managed to smile. 

"Have I surprised you, your royal highness?" 

Henry didn't speak. Instead he stood up, eyes blinking to clear his vision, made a step forward inside the circle, towards Alex... 

And got down on one knee. 

The whole room immediately stopped clapping. In fact, Alex was so shocked he didn't even see Henry taking a small box out of his pocket and opening it wide until a silver ring with a small, delicate stone was looking right back at him. 

"I would do this back home, that's why Pez was supposed to keep you distracted. But it doesn't matter, for once I'm happy my plans got ruined." Henry gave him a teary smile. "Alex, I love you. You are my best friend, my soulmate. And I want our forever to be exactly this way. Full of surprises." Henry wiped his eye with his spare hand, before searching his pocket again. "I had prepared a list with reasons why you should say yes, but--"

Alex dived to kiss him, before he finished the sentence, as the room erupted into tears, clapping, cheers and even whistling, and Henry would tell them to lower their voices just a little bit down, but Alex was just kissing him, murmuring yes, ring still between their bodies and he was so in love he could die. 

When they finally broke apart, no one seemed to stop teasing them. Not that Henry minded. He knew this time by far topped all the rest meetings. 

"I was supposed to do this at home." 

"I'm glad you didn't wait." Alex passed his arm around his waist as they made their way outside. The children were sworn to secrecy before they left (although Henry absolutely made Bradley to send him the video he filmed of the proposal). Just because they wouldn't tell the world yet, it didn't mean they didn't want it for their eyes. 

"No, I don't mean that. I meant, we had a whole plan going on with Pez. I had left him the keys to go and fix the atmosphere. We had even planned for flowers and a three course meal."

"Well, no offense but I liked how the proposal turned out. And I'm willing to act surprised when we reach home."

"So I can propose again?"

"Without the ring though, because I won't take it out any time soon."

Henry laughed, as he spotted Cash's car and they began walking that way. 

"And next week 𝘐 can propose. I can't even be mad you beat me to it." 

"You don't have to--"

"I had a ring specially made though! What am I supposed to do? Call and say I don't need it anymore because my boyfriend proposed first?" 

"Well technically, it wasn't a fair fight. I had that ring a while ago. I was just waiting for the perfect moment. But I can act surprised next week."

"You better." Alex smirked. "Hen?"

"Hm?"

"When you meant a while ago? I don't remember you, searching for rings." 

"I purchased it a few months ago. I didn't have the chance to give it to you then, so I did it now. You are in this for me, Alex, even if you won't remember anything ever again, even if I have to remind you my name every morning. You are my all." Henry smiled lovingly. "Now where was I? The yellow diamond symbolizes--" 

The blonde never got to finish because Alex pulled him in for another kiss. Even Cash honked at them, to make them hurry. 

God, it would be so hard convincing everyone they weren't engaged. 

It was barely nine in the morning when the sun, coming through the window, and the cold morning breeze made the prince wake up. He stretched before he opened his eyes, trying to find Alex next to him on the bed... 

He only found cold sheets tossed aside. And Alex, with his back turned on him, sitting on the edge of their bed, still half dressed. 

"Alex?" 

His fiance turned then, ring still in hand, with a smile that reached his ears. A smile that warmed Henry's heart, a smile different than the ones before. 

This one didn't just belong to the new Alex. 

"Yellow roses of Texas." Alex whispered. "Like the diamond in the ring, the flowers in the hospital...and your tie, when my mom won again."

This smile belonged to the old Alex as well. 

"You remember." Henry whispered. 

"We made history." Alex said, when his boyfriend, now fiance, tossed the covers aside and rushed to cup his face. 

"How could I forget?" 

Chapter Text

Alex's proposal

It is a truth universally acknowledged that Alex Claremont Diaz was never the writer. Did he know how to express his thoughts in a way that didn't appear rude? Yes, most of the times, when he wasn't really angry. But would he find himself writing a love letter from scratch? No. Just no. 

So after Henry proposed with the most smooth, most prince-like way he could, depending on their surroundings, Alex had enough of an amazing proposal to top. 

At first he decided to think about this later, when he would have the ring on his hands. But when the ring finally came, beautiful and specially made, he just ran out of excuses to keep postponing it. 

Henry was a prince, and even if he wasn't, he deserved to be spoiled like one. 

So Alex did what he knew best. He started making notes in small papers, secretly from Henry, listing all the pros and cons of involving more people to this, the pros and cons of a romantic proposal or a less romantic one and especially the pros and cons of public versus private proposal. 

The bad thing about his little notes were that they were easily misplaced (and he had to come up with an excuse why Henry found a small note on their living room with only the words '𝘞𝘦 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘴𝘦𝘹 𝘢𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘳' on it). 

The positive thing is that Henry was still as oblivious as he could be. Yes, Alex had made his intentions about proposing quite clear, but almost three weeks had passed since then and he simply thought Alex had abandoned the idea. One proposal was enough anyway, he had clarified this. 

They had agreed to keep it private until Henry's birthday at least, so they could enjoy almost a month engaged without anyone bothering them. But now, as Henry's birthday were just around the corner, Alex wished they had arranged to keep it private until 𝘩𝘪𝘴 birthday so he would have more time to organize everything. 

"Everything alright, love?" Henry was sitting on their couch, with Alex's legs on his lap. He stroked his ankle carefully, as Alex removed his glasses. Staring at the computer screen wouldn't solve his lack of ideas. 

"Yeah, just tired." The brunette closed the screen before stretching, his legs still remaining on Henry. 

"Just to remind you, your doctor's appointment is at nine. There is a slight chance I will pass by the shelter before, but I will be back here by eight thirty so we can go together, alright?" 

"Kay." Alex yawned loudly, before completely changing his position, putting his head on Henry's shoulder. The latter was kind enough to share his blanket. 

"If I fall asleep on you, will you carry me upstairs?" 

"No." Henry huffed a laugh. 

"Why not?"

"You are awake now and you are feeling tired. We can go upstairs before you end up asleep here."

"This is no fun."

"If my back gets sore, I won't be fun either."

"Old man."

"I'm a year older than you." 

"My point still stands." Alex nuzzled against his neck. 

"You hurt your fiance's feelings, do you know that?" Henry's hand caressed his arm and Alex smiled. 

"Will a kiss make it better?" 

"Maybe." Henry pretended to be hurt, turning his face on the other direction. 

"Two kisses and a blowjob?"

"I thought you were tired."

"I will owe you one tomorrow." 

Henry pretended to think about it. "I want 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘦𝘦 kisses."

"Two and a half."

"Deal." Henry chuckled, uniting his lips with Alex's. It was a laugh that Alex had learned to know the difference between it and the different other laughs he had heard coming from the blonde, cause in fact Henry had laughed, 𝘢 𝘭𝘰𝘵, over the last weeks. 

And just when Alex was convinced the proposal would be something easy after all, he knew there was no way he would propose to this man unless the proposal equalled to the most perfect, magnificent, dreamy proposal known to mankind.

The days passed with scribbling, writing, some more notes and so many phone calls in flower shops, all in vain. On the night before Henry's birthday, while Alex's was sitting on the bed, scrolling through the messages on the group chat called 𝘏𝘦𝘯𝘳𝘺'𝘴 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘱𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘺 🎉🥳, he realized that his last chance was tomorrow. Either he'd have to propose before, during or after the party they were preparing for his fiance, or his chance would be lost. They had already prepared a small paragraph to inform the world about their union (that would be posted on social media by their teams on exactly four a.m) so either Alex would make up his mind, or he'd have to give Henry his ring just like that. 

Sighing with disappointment, he put his phone down and wrapped his arms around his sleeping fiance. 

He'd have time to think about it in the morning. 

It was almost seven p.m. 

Meaning he had nine hours to find a way to propose before the whole internet would find out about their engagement. Meaning he had nine hours to offer Henry whatever kind of fairytale he could offer. 

"Ready, love?" Henry climbed down the stairs, fixing his tie on the same time. Alex immediately turned off his phone. 

"Of course. Hey, you've got something on your face."

"What--" Alex grabbed him by the tie to bring him close, kissing him sloppily. 

"Got it." 

"You are a menace." Henry chuckled. "Come on, we will miss your reservation." 

"After you." Alex opened the door wide, and Henry eyed him suspiciously. 

"You just want to look at my ass, right?" 

"You've got a nice ass." The brunette smirked before giving him a light slap as he passed by. 

God, he loved this man. 

Henry hadn't suspected a thing, not until Pez, Bea, June and Nora showed up at the restaurant, all in hideous hats, carrying a cake and their presents, all while singing happy birthday in pure cacophony. Henry laughed and hid his red face anyway. 

The super six spent four hours laughing and trying to catch up for all the time they hadn't managed to meet with each other, so the topics moved from one place to the other; Pez's last encounter with a rude celeb, Bea's new boyfriend who played the guitar, June's job, Nora's plans to buy a house, so of course it was about time one or the other would say something. 

"Speaking of rings..." Nora stopped Pez while he was narrating their experience watching the movie The Ring for the first time. Alex suspected it was because Percy would say something embarrassing. 

"Speaking of 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 beautiful rings, you mean..." 

"Worthy of a beautiful fiance." Henry said and everyone apart from Alex awed. Alex rolled his eyes but his smile was cutting his face in two. 

"You have a way with words, do you know that?" 

"Yeah, yeah, Henry is perfect. We've heard you a thousand times, Alex. Where is the ring?" 

The brunette looked around once, just to be sure and grabbed the chain around his throat, revealing a ring hanging. His sister stretched forward to see it, then Pez. 

"When the engagement is made public, I will wear it. But until then, I can't risk anyone seeing it."

"Five hours to go, darling." Henry whispered on his ear, kissing him on the cheek. "I can't wait to tell the world." 

And then, suddenly, as if a lighting strike hit him, Alex jolted, eyes widening. 

He had an idea. 

He was super late, but he finally had an idea. 

Excusing himself from the table, he ran to the restaurant's bathroom. 

He prayed Amy would be awake. 

The couple returned home an hour later, around midnight, hand in hand. Alex made a step back then, giving Henry the chance to unlock the door. 

"What? Me?" Henry rolled his eyes and shoved his hand on the inside pocket of his jacket, retrieving his key. He had his eyes fixed on Alex though, as if to decode the tiny little smirk he had plastered on his face. 

"Why the smile, Alex Claremont Diaz?"

"Because... I have the hottest fiance in the whole world." 

"That's one." Henry unlocked the door, pushing it open and waiting for Alex to get inside first. 

"And in a few hours everyone will know you are mine." The brunette smirked, pulling the coat off his shoulders as he passed him by. "Also, it's Alex 𝘍𝘰𝘹 Claremont Diaz, baby." 

A glimpse of light red spread on Henry's cheeks. "Come on! Get inside." 

"Bossy now?" Alex chuckled, while the prince locked the door and removed his coat too, all in a matter of seconds. His excitement gave space to surprise though when Alex turned on the lights. 

The floor of the otherwise clean brownstone was covered with red petals, all forming a path towards the stairs. Henry took a good look at them, as if they were fake. 

"What are these?" He raised an eyebrow at his fiance who was grinning. 

"What do they look like?" 

"You mean it?"

"The stairs won't climb themselves, babe."

Henry rolled his eyes for good measure, passing by Alex to climb up the stairs slowly, where the flowers were leading him. 

"You know I'd sleep with you regardless, don't you?"

Alex pretended to be shocked. "Excuse you! I tried to be romantic--"

"For my birthday?"

"Of course for your birthday."

"Alex, the most romantic thing you've done on our years living together is removing the things I don't eat from my plate and eat them."

"Who knew you were such a picky eater? For real, who doesn't like olives?"

"𝘓𝘰𝘵𝘴 of people!"

"Lots of 𝘸𝘦𝘪𝘳𝘥 people!" 

Henry sighed in a poor attempt to hide his laughter, but continued to follow the petals. They were on the second floor now, almost reaching their bedroom. 

"You are calling me weird while you try being romantic? That's not very romantic of you." 

"Oh, you'll see."

The blonde reached for the door handle and stopped at the last moment. 

"Is my birthday present in there?"

"Sort of."

"When you said in the restaurant you'd 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘮𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘳, I thought you were talking about sex."

"Because you have an obscene and very vulgar mind." 

"Alex filling our house with rose petals and speaking with words like that?" Henry smirked but surprise was still clear on his features. "Who are you and what have you done to my obscene and very vulgar fiance?" 

"Come on! Open it." Alex jumped up and down impatiently and Henry had to nod to stop him. 

"Fine." He opened the door to see the petals continuing. Not on the bed, as he thought. But over the bed, stopping exactly in front of the large window. 

"The point of petals is to lead you somewhere, love." Henry turned back to Alex, with a smile. "You brought me in a dead end."

"I brought you where it has the best view."

For a moment, Henry looked puzzled. Then a loud sound was heard and the sky filled with colors. 

Henry watched the fireworks light up, one after the other. He counted one, two, three blues, maybe four reds, a couple whites here and there. 

It was magnificent, Henry was truly standing in awe. But in all that greatness, all he wanted to do was share this with Alex. 

"Alex, do you see this--" The prince turned around to find Alex on his one knee, a small box in hand. 

Needless to say Henry lost his breath. 

"Henry..." Alex took a deep breath, but his determination was lost a moment later, when his mind blanked. 

"Oh f-- I forgot everything... Okay, let's go again-- no, no, I want to do this!" He said when Henry tried to tell him to stand. "Henry...love of my life. I feel like you've entered my life twice by now, or...maybe not just twice. Maybe a million times. The thing is, Henry...you are amazing. You truly are. You have a huge heart, you help people in need, you care for everyone, even if they are unfair to you. Hell, you even made an amnesiac man fall in love with you again." Alex forced himself to breathe, even if his heart was racing. "I am not great at being romantic sometimes. I literally googled 'how to make a romantic proposal' a thousand times already and this idea came to me two hours ago. But I'd love to spend my life next to you, learning all the things that you like or bother you or eat whatever food you find so disgusting you don't even want it on your plate. Will you be mine, Henry? As I'm yours?"

Henry took a careful, considering breath. 

"Tell me you have recorded your speech somewhere."

"Why?" Alex's expression shifted when the prince started crying, making the first stand to console him. "Oh, baby..."

"I'm fine, I'm fine." Henry said when Alex removed his fingers from covering his teary eyes. "Just...love, you left me speechless." 

"Surprised you again?"

"Somehow you did, even though you clearly had told me you wanted to propose too. But...you didn't have to do all that. I'd say yes even if it was just you."

"I wanted to do it though. If what would make you happy is the dreamiest fucking proposal I could think of, you deserve the dreamiest fucking proposal I could think of."

Henry's eyes softened. "𝘠𝘰𝘶 make me happy, Alex." Wiping the tear threatening to spill, he pushed up a smile. "I believe you have something--"

"Yes, right..." Alex helped him place the ring on his finger, before giving him the softest, most loving kiss he could. 

"And for the record there is a camera right there." Alex gestured with his eyes to where a camera was sitting, in the other corner of the room. 

"How?"

"Amy helped." Alex admitted. "With 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 recorded and the video of your proposal we could maybe...edit a little video of us? I don't want the world to know only with words our teams put together."

"I would actually...love that." Henry smiled. "I should thank Amy for this then."

"And..."

"𝘈𝘯𝘥 my amazing fiance who got me the most perfect ring and most amazing proposal I could imagine. History, huh?" Henry's arms surrounded his waist, giving him another peck on the lips. 

"Bet we could make some." Alex repeated the words he had engraved on Henry's silver ring with the blue gem. "I love it when you quote me." 

"I was just reading the words engraved."

"Of course you did." Alex grabbed the camera to turn it off. "As you can see I put so much thought into it I even stood on your right the whole time. Shaan would be proud." 

Henry rolled his eyes fondly. "Of course."

"And the protocol--"

"Alex, love, fuck the protocol."

The brunette raised his eyes so quick Henry was sure he would drop the camera. "This was surprisingly hot, not gonna lie." 

"What are you going to do for this Mr. Fox Claremont Diaz?" Henry smirked playfully and Alex had to lean in for another kiss. 

"I'll tell you, Mr. Fox Claremont Diaz. I'm going to send the videos to our support teams to edit them and then I'm gonna return to our room when I'm gonna do some very bad things to you." 

"A weird sense of deja vu." Henry commented, fiddling with his new ring happily while his fiance ran to his office. 

If he was shaking less, he would spot the similarities between the blue stone and his eyes that Alex adored. 

It was 3:56 AM exactly and Alex had his eyes plastered on the clock, his head on Henry's chest. The blonde was stroking the back of his hand slowly with his thumb for the last few minutes, but as his movements slowed more and more, Alex knew it was about time he would hear snoring. 

"Henry?"

"Hm." The prince groaned. 

"Are you sleeping?" 

"For the one hundredth time in two minutes, no, I'm not." He resumed the stroking. 

"It's our last minutes without anyone knowing."

"I know love."

"Have you turned off your notifications?"

"Two hours ago." Henry breathed through his nose and closed his eyes. He didn't dare stop moving his fingers though. 

"Do you want me to stop talking so you can sleep?" Alex asked, now suddenly conscious. Henry was tired obviously and the news would be out even if they were asleep. 

The prince gave him a small smile, then a kiss on the curls. 

"No. It's a nice kind of waiting. Like being a kid and waiting for Santa Claus. It has a certain comfort." 

"How are you poetic even half asleep?" 

"Degree in English Literature, remember?" 

"You never let me forget." Alex watched the clock change all the digits. His palm got squeezed by Henry's hand who had the same idea to look. 

It was done. The video was out. 

"I can't wait to marry you." Alex muttered. 

"We are technically publicly engaged for about a second." Henry chuckled. "But I can't wait to marry you either." 

The brunette grabbed his phone then. He wasn't notified, but he could already see the exact same video getting reposted and reposted by fan accounts. He didn't open any chats, or saw any comments; he knew better than that. He just turned to Henry, ready to speak... 

The prince was fast asleep then, only small snores escaping his lips. And Alex didn't fight him about that. 

He snapped a quick selfie of them both, one that the media would never see, and kept Henry's hand close to his chest. Their rings, different but so similar, glistened next to the screen's brightness. 

𝘕𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘦𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘥𝘥𝘴, Alex thought to himself before drifting off to sleep. 

Henry's letters (chronologically) 

Alex,

This letter isn't meant to ever reach your eyes. In fact, I don't know why I'm even writing to you right now. Maybe as an atonement for my behavior, for the harsh and unfair way I treated you. To torture myself as I'm sitting here, taking an eight hour long trip despite my will, and ironically, because of it on the same time.

I didn't mean to hurt you. I know that at this point, words hurt and sting and I should have been more careful.

Funny how everyone thinks you are the irrational one when in fact I showed that honestly, I cannot hold my tongue as well.

I could start this letter by apologizing, or quoting a letter a closeted gay history figure you adore dedicated to their same sex supposed friend. Heck, I could write you one myself. But I am a coward, when it came to feelings I always were. And you deserve something better than just a letter. You deserve to have someone to kiss your wounds or, even better, not cause them at the first place.

The plane is taking off and I'm seriously considering returning. I'm seriously considering running back home to find you and give you a proper apology.

I know you don't want to see me. I don't blame you, when my thoughts about our fight return, I'm always taking your side. That's why I'm not returning. Not right now at least.

I already said I am not good with emotions, but I would never leave you. This trip wasn't a goodbye. This trip wasn't to unlove you. I don't think I could even if I tried.

In a twisted game of honesty, maybe I wanted to show you how it felt to live with someone and still feel alone.

I regret it. If I knew we would reach this part, I would never fix my suitcases. I would eat the breakfast you made, I'd thank you for trying, even when sometimes you can't be there, I'd take you back to bed and I'd show you how much I missed you, in every way known to mankind.

I've been told only fools think about the past and the changes they had to make. Guess I'm a fool. But I'm also absolutely, wholeheartedly, in love with you.

When I'll reach England I'll call. I hope you will answer.

And just with your word, my foolish heart will return back home.

Yours,

Henry, a fool

Alex, love of my life, my soulmate,

I never thought I'd write so fast. But then again if I didn't, I would lose my mind.

I'm keeping my phone in a distance, afraid of touching it as if it's a ticking bomb. I am terrified of hearing news. I am terrified to think that when I land you might already be...

Dead.

I don't like that word. I utterly despise it in fact. The thought of Alex Claremont Diaz ever seizing to exist never crossed my mind. I was always imagining you as an immortal magnificent creature, who will roam earth for centuries, because the world does need an Alex Claremont Diaz and will always need one.

If life was not cruel, it would allow me to go first. I still hope so. In fact, if I were extremely lucky, I'd die of old age, in my sleep, next to you.

Life seems extremely cruel right now, love.

I could try and describe everything I'm feeling, but my hands are already shaking and it's getting hard to breathe. Instead, from a small private jet, I'm doing something I haven't done for a while.

I pray. I pray for your safe recovery, I pray to land and not come across bad news, I pray to have you in my arms again so our last words won't be as bitter.

I pray to let you know every day how much you mean to me. Not until the rest of your life, but until the rest of mine's.

I think we both mutually agreed you'll live longer. No returns.

When something goes bad, people usually say that after a while, you'll remember it and laugh. I really hope that is the case. But now, no laughing comes to me. And I'm pretty sure it won't come after a while either.

But for now I will compromise with saying everything I need to say when I'm home. When I'm next to you.

So wait for me. Till I can hold us both, gather your strength to be MY strength, darling. I pray for that, too.

Always, completely, yours,

Henry.

Alex, my angel,

As I'm sitting next to you, holding your warm hand, tracing patterns on your fingers, two things are on my mind, but I will keep the second for when you are awake and well.

The first one is that it should have been me. I should have been by your side, even if the outcome was the same. I would be laying next to you, in life or somewhere in the middle, always where I can follow.

Not being able to hear you talk, or see you awake is painful. The kind of painful that creates a lump on your throat and doesn't leave. And just the thought that you might be in physical pain...

The doctor said you don't feel a thing. I really hope that's the case. And when you'll wake up, I will keep my promise if you let me.

I'll be your strength. I'll be your support. You were so good, so perfect, staying with us, even if we don't deserve an angel like you (yes I called you angel. Twice. Shocking, honestly). I know I don't deserve your forgiveness. But deep down, I really hope your angelic nature will give me this salvation. Will give me one last chance.

I will be extremely careful with your heart from now on, darling.

Because I realized it also carries mine.

I would end this letter here, but I just felt another tiny squeeze. I will not take this as a sign of forgiveness, because this doesn't matter for now. I will take this as a sign for keeping fighting.

In my sleepless nights, I will still dream of both, your forgiveness and you.

Ultimately yours,

Henry.

Alex, my perfect love, 

The doctor said you were doing progress and that was enough to make me smile for the whole day. 

Maybe I am foolish. But I have an instinct that by next week, we will be home, on each other's arms, our fights already far away. On the hospital, I met a little girl today while I was coming to visit. She must have been around my niece's age, but that was not the only thing that surprised me about her. 

She had your smile, darling. The one smile you have reserved for people you love, the one that makes your eyes sparkle and your poor boyfriend to fall more in love with you. 

On the previous letter I told you these days I am thinking of two things, but mostly your forgiveness. 

I guess if these letters never reach your eyes I don't mind admitting it to myself. 

I would like to marry you, love. Watch that smile of yours I adore while you grow old, watch your eyes sparkle while you grow old and watch me, grow older (𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 a year) through your eyes. 

I have known you would like us to have children one day, but I never told you how much I would like the same. I would like to have a child, a child that will learn to smile like you, a child that will be compassionate, loving, caring, all the amazing qualities you have. But I would like them to like 'The Return of the Jedi' more than 'Empire'. I love you, but I want them to have a nice taste (even if it makes them a cheesy romantic, always seeking for a happy end). 

What is wrong with a happy end? I was wishing for one my whole life until I found you. And now that I found you, I'm only wishing what we have will never end. 

Return to me soon, darling. We have a movie marathon to have together. 

Your gigantic, sappy, embarrassing romantic who just wants the happily ever after, 

Henry

PS. Because plagiarism is illegal, yes, this is from your incomplete list. Sue me, I don't mind. My boyfriend is a lawyer. 

Alex, my beloved,

Life is feeling extremely cruel right now.

I'm sitting inside the car, Shaan is driving and all I keep thinking is...

How did we reach this point?

How you, waking up started feeling like a nightmare I cannot escape?

Maybe I'm selfish. Scratch that. I am selfish. I had you, I had everything I ever needed, we had our love and I left. I broke your heart and now I'm getting upset because you do not remember.

It's not your fault. Nothing is your fault. It's just that sometimes, I wish I was better.

My therapist tells me feeling like that is not alright. But it does feel good. The self punish.

I even started to take my antidepressants again. Prescribed and everything, don't you worry.

Who is left to worry? Would you worry?

Probably you wouldn't spare me a second glance now. I do not blame you.

The part of me that loves you, tells me to leave you. To let you grow and find someone better, someone who deserves you, even if I don't think a person that does so has been born yet.

The part of me that loves us, tells me to do what you would. Fucking fight. For you. For me. For us.

My grandma once told me I am really capable of walking away. Today I'm taking the risk to prove her wrong. I'm taking the risk to love you silently, from afar, like you are a pretty statue and I cannot touch. You are standing behind a glass. I cannot speak. The glass is soundproof.

I cannot breathe. And that's not the glass to blame for.

Pez convinced me to start going to the shelter's book club again. I was supposed to read a book about a prince who was in love with a boy who didn't like him at first, but eventually, their love story almost changed their fate.

I always found similarities between the myth of Achilles and our love story. You will understand why with a simple phrase.

I kept thinking that, no matter what, at least we aren't doomed. It sounds foolish when you put it like that, but we aren't. Or at least we weren't.

Since I will probably never finish the book and since I will miss the next book club, I'm highlighting a phrase that I really loved.

He is half of my soul, as the poets say.

I really wished I had written that for you first. And since I still cannot apologize properly, I will atone by apologizing through my letters. For now.

Alex, darling, you are half my soul. I hurt you by saying you are not my family when this is not even halfway true. The term family is too small to describe the impact you had on my life. No, you are not even half of my soul. You made your way inside my soul and became it. Changed it, shaped it, and I don't even complain.

For a soul like yours, I would willingly give mine away.

It's two in the morning now and I just reached home. It will be the last time I sleep here. Tomorrow, first thing in the morning, people will come in and make it look like I never truly existed, like you never inhabited my soul, like I never inhabited brownstone.

At least I hope your night is better than mine.

Sleep well, my spyche.

Love,

Henry.

Dear Alex,

When did just seeing you become more necessary than breathing? It must have happened some time after our first meeting and I must have left it slip. I'm counting the hours until I can see you. I'm counting the seconds until I'll finally be at your presence. You have ruined me, Alex Claremont Diaz. And thank you. From the bottom of my heart thank you.

Since I'll spend the night not talking much and not being able to express my feelings, I might as well do it in here. And just to show you the impact you have on my life...

AN INCOMPLETE LIST. THINGS I LOVE ABOUT FSOTUS ALEXANDER GABRIEL CLAREMONT DIAZ.

1. Your smile. Not the one you have for the cameras, but the one you have reserved just for me.

2. The way your voice sounds when you first wake up in the morning.

3. That look you have when someone challenges you to a subject you know a lot about.

4. How you always, no matter what, try your best, because you believe that this world can be saved.

5. How you persuade me to do things I wouldn't do under different circumstances. And how I always like it. Even if it doesn't end well.

6. Your smile. Especially when you laugh and smile on the same time. I said that before, but I'm allowed to repeat it.

7. The fact that you are a stubborn ass.

8. The fact that you have a great ass.

9. The face you just made when you read number eight. You didn't really think I'd copy your list, did you?

10.all the things I learn from you every day. Including how to make lists.

11. How I will always believe our bodies were made for one another. When I hug you, or hold your hand, it just seems correct.

12. Our height difference. Don't pout, just check number eleven again.

13. Where you wear my signet ring to your neck. It's like you are carrying me with you and I don't know what I have done to enjoy this privilege. Maybe I should give it back to you. After your surgery, it stayed with me.

14. How you are honestly and with all the affection in the world, the biggest nerd I have ever seen.

15. Your incredible and sexy brain power.

16. The ability to always make me smile. What is this sorcery?

17. Your ability to striptease to London Boy by Taylor Swift (AND sing it at the same time).

18. How you deep down always knew my full name but never used it.

19. That simple H you write in your letters.

20. How you led me home, how you saved me even if I didn't think I deserved to be saved. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for leading me home.

I have so many things in my mind right now. David is awake at my feet and I'm trying my best to stay focused. I will probably continue my list in a bigger piece of paper, since this one is running short.

The clock says it's almost 4 a.m. 17 hours until I see you, Alexander. I can wait. I would wait my whole life.

With love,

H

Alex, my human sunshine, 

My heart is racing so fast that is threatening to burst out of my chest. I have missed you, dear. You were right there and I was right there as well, but there was distance I couldn't close. I promised to myself I wouldn't close. 

The doctor said not to share details that might shock you and I, in all seriousness, just wanted to fall on your arms like a soldier returning home from battle. 

Would that shock you? If your sworn arch nemesis that you thought I was, wrapped you in his arms and just somehow...made sense? 

You used to joke that my grandma would assassinate you every time you stepped out of line, but I think your parents (despite the soft spot you claim they have for me) would assassinate me as well if I did that. 

Bea advised me that for a day, we already made progress. And the hug had to be postponed for now. 

So this is how the (technical spare) heir of the British throne found himself searching for excuses to meet his crush/amnesiac boyfriend again, like a lovestruck, horny teenager. And if this small paragraph doesn't sum up my life the last few days, I don't know what does. 

I am angry with myself when I wish that you would find something to prove my existence there. I had also agreed to let you know slowly, but this hasn't stopped hurting. I hope June and Nora take good care of you. Actually scratch that, I hope you let them take care of you. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to be safe, even if now it's not something 𝘐 can offer you. 

With you smiling, I feel like I could go to war against the world and win. 

Henry, a lovestruck, horny teenager. 

Alex... 

Why did you stop eating, sweetheart? And most importantly, how can I help? 

I feel so angry with myself, sitting here, writing letters to no one without having the chance to talk to you, to let you tell me everything that bothers you. 

My therapist insists I am doing the right thing and has advised me to keep writing. As she said and I quote, it gives me the strength to go on. 

How can I help you smile again? What can I do so I will feel less than a useless weight taking space? June and Nora couldn't help, your parents couldn't help. 

Give me, or anyone, a sign, please. And I'll give you whatever you ask for. 

Don't give up fighting now, love. I'm coming to help. 

(Hopefully still) yours, 

Henry. 

Alex, 

I have to admit, after the party on the shelter, I was positive things were getting better. 

Have I done something wrong? Did I push you in any way, somehow, and now I am paying the price? 

When you told me the new Alex didn't want me there, I was surprised. I was hurt, I was angry... 

I wonder, is this how you felt when I told you you weren't a part of my family? Or was it even worse? Because if it was, I deserved it, to be kicked out I mean. I will do whatever necessary to atone. 

I will return to you, again and again, until I get the chance to tell you everything. And then it will be up to you to decide. You have crossed the Atlantic twice for me (suspecting you would do so many more if I was a bigger obtuse fucking asshole). Least I can do was fight for us when you can't fight for yourself. 

I will fight, love. I would swim the Atlantic myself just for you. 

Yours, 

Henry, a pretty mediocre swimmer. 

Alex Claremont Diaz, 

Maybe I have told you already but you've ruined me. How am I supposed to function when after all these days I will finally sleep in the brownstone? In different rooms from each other, yes, but still closer than usual. 

My hand is shaking and I cannot recognize my own letters. David is in my feet, you are safe next door... 

I feel like I can breathe again. I am this close to go knock in your door to remind you to take your pills, but you are clever enough and I won't ruin whatever progress we have made. 

My whole life under the same roof again. Even the guests' room seems comfortable, more pretty even. 

I cannot believe how granted I was taking the Christmases with you. How I realized how much I missed them only when we couldn't have them. 

One part of me tells me to calm down, since things can still change overnight. Another part of me feels like a boy in love, making impulsive decisions. 

I believe this will be the last letter I will write. I started writing them when I couldn't find hope anywhere, but right now I know where my hope is. Sleeping in the next room. 

We deserve a happy ending. I promise you I will do everything in my power so we will take it. 

We can make history twice. For now, sleep well darling. 

With love, 

Your H.