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Alhaitham likes to kiss with his eyes open.
Not every time, but often enough. Since he and Kaveh finally started their romantic relationship, he found his penchant for thinking so much to be a bit… annoying.
When his eyes close as their lips meet he finds himself lost in everything that could be. They’re nice thoughts at least. Well, mostly.
It started out with ideas of where else he’d love or loves to kiss Kaveh. His office, the shower, Zubayr Theater, against his bedroom door… so many places.
Unfortunately, one day a less fun thought intrudes his mind when he has Kaveh pressed against the kitchen counter as he kisses him.
What if, for some reason, this was the last time he would kiss Kaveh? What if something terrible happened? What if one day he found Kaveh bruised and bloody and that would be his last memory of Kaveh’s lips?
Kaveh had to push him off then. Their heavy breaths out of sync as wild eyes found each other.
Kaveh had questioned what happened to make Alhaitham kiss him so hard it was painful. Alhaitham could only stutter out an apology with some excuse of stress.
It happened a few more frustrating times and Alhaitham had gotten sick of pulling away to reorient himself.
So one day, he opened his eyes. He was able to ground himself in the familiarity of wherever they were. It helped to keep him in the present.
He loved to watch the way Kaveh’s eyes moved behind his lids. He would count his lashes or recall the memory of watching Kaveh put on his eyeliner as he studied the clean lines.
One day Kaveh opens his eyes too. Alhaitham’s heart skips a beat. He could drown in those beautiful carmine eyes.
It was just a flutter at first but when Kaveh seemed to realize he saw green eyes instead of eyelids he opens them to stare back.
Neither pull away right away but their lips stop moving and Alhaitham takes a shuddering breath as he waits for Kaveh’s commentary.
Kaveh pulls away slowly, eyes darting over Alhaitham’s face and it takes everything in him to maintain eye contact as a wave of embarrassment crashes over him.
“Are you okay?”
The question catches him off guard but maybe it shouldn’t have.
“Yes.”
“Do you do that all the time?”
Alhaitham shakes his head no, trying to read Kaveh’s expression.
“Only sometimes.”
“Is there a reason?”
Alhaitham frowns, he knew that was coming. He couldn’t even come up with a good excuse.
“Sometimes my mind comes up with scenarios I don’t like. When I open my eyes and look at you I can focus on the present better.”
Kaveh’s mouth twists sourly.
“Should I be offended if you think about other things while kissing me?”
Alhaitham laughs loudly, surprising both of them.
“Jealous? No, Kaveh. I still think about you, always you. My mind just jumps to a variety of futures with you… some aren’t ones I ever want to meet.”
He pulls Kaveh in close until their foreheads touch.
“Okay, Haitham. You’ll have to make this interruption up to me.”
Alhaitham snorts.
“You’re the one that pulled away and started a conversation.”
He takes a moment before asking the question he fears.
“Does it bother you?”
Kaveh pecks his lips and smiles.
“Only that you didn’t tell me sooner. Otherwise, I don’t care as long as you keep kissing me.”
Alhaitham smiles at him before reuniting their lips.
How did he get so lucky?