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Stealing Hearts 101: Engagement

Summary:

The Phantom Thieves might be disbanded, but knowing how to steal hearts never goes out of style.

Or

Ren proposes to Akechi, and well, he caves.

Notes:

Honestly? This was meant to be a drabble for Shuake Week. As always, I died. Anyways, take this poorly written, badly edited, but hopefully endearing shuake fic. Also, sorry about the summary. I am bad at them, and the plot is relatively straightforward.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Akechi nuzzles into Ren’s chest, adjusting the angle of his book for easier reading. His gaze flicks up, taking in Ren’s eyes, uncovered and honest, yet, oddly indiscernible.

“Don’t look at me like that. You’re thinking something weird,” Akechi scolds, his stomach full of toxic gas.

Ren stares unfettered—if anything, he’s more determined—gaze piercing and soft, stripping away at Akechi’s nonchalance.

“Let’s get married,” Ren deadpans, his fingers intertwining with Akechi’s long locs, his nails invading Akechi’s scalp, scratching gently, weaving soft tufts of hair, like a ringmaster taming an animal about to bite—knowing Akechi, biting isn’t off the table.

“No,” Akechi utters firmly, lip curling with vehemence. Ren had been asking for weeks; each implore met with a sharp no. That said, Ren was wearing him down. He just knew it.

He snapped his hand back, unsuccessful at his taming conquest. Akechi scoffs, shuffling away from Ren’s warmth, and clutches his book, the pages bowing under atomic pressure.

“That’s a stupid answer; you can’t say no without a why. You always have a why,” Ren insists, trying vainly to lock Akechi’s gaze.

Akechi rolled his eyes and resumed reading, a thick annoyance pinking his cheeks.

“You can’t ice me out,” Ren smiled sarcastically, moving to cage Akechi. He exhaled sharply and narrowed his eyes in a stalwart glare, icing Ren like it was his god-given duty—maybe it was.

Ren, never one to give up, placed his hand in front of Akechi’s line of sight, interrupting the text. “You can’t ignore me. I won’t let you,” Ren quipped, leaning towards Akechi’s face, lips quirked in an infectious smirk.

“You insufferable trash,” Akechi spat, averting his eyes—if he looked, he might give in. Ren sensed the hesitation, taking it as a preemptive win.

Unfortunately for Ren, he carelessly left his hand in the crook of Akechi’s book. The following slam cracked Ren’s hand, bringing a twisted smile to Akechi’s face. “Were you raised by wolves? Your manners are deplorable.”

Despite the newly made fracture, Ren, unfazed, retorts: “Wolves? No. Cat? Yes, Morgana.” His countenance was composed as always.

“That idiotic cat,” Akechi growls, meeting Ren’s lovesick pupils, a nauseating feeling—affection and love—coursing through him. “The answer is no.”

Ren’s stare was lidded, thick lashes dewy, framing his intense look. It felt almost foreign, something left behind for shadow negotiations and boss battles, not an emotionally stunted lover. He was about to ask Akechi to “lend him his power” or “show him the money.”

“Amamiya,” Akechi said tightly, his eyes glassy. Ren gulped frantically, his heart bouncing out of his chest. He reached for Akechi’s hand: “I will never marry you,” he snarled—like a cornered cat—snatching his hand away from Ren’s grasp.

At this, Ren, despite his desperation, boldly refuted: “You said you wouldn’t date me either, but here you are, sitting on my lap in our shared apartment.” His words were confident, but his hands fidgeted with his fringe, a nervous habit.

“I have my apartment. I don’t pay rent here. Therefore it is YOUR apartment. Speaking of, I wouldn’t move in even if you asked,” Akechi snickers, his relaxed state still sharp enough to cut.

“You’re being pedantic. You’re always here. You shop with me to stock the fridge. You sleep in my bed every night; your good skincare, soap, and toothbrush are here. Your detective case is right there.” Ren pointed at the lacquered bag, the A shining bright as always. “Even if I did ask, it is pointless. You decided to make your home here anyway,” Ren laughed, his pulse a mile a minute.

“It’s closer to the detective agency. That doesn’t mean anything. I still don’t live here and won’t marry you,” Akechi insisted, almost lost for rebuttal at Ren’s sound offense. “And it doesn’t matter my reason. I don’t need to explain myself to you.”

“Uh-huh, so you just happen to be here today too? You don’t have work.” Ren paused, relishing the affectionate disdain in Akechi’s eyes. “Also, you don’t need to explain yourself. I already know why. It’s because you love me,” Ren coos, dragging out the last sentence with a casual smile.

“Gurgh,” Akechi splutters, balling his hands into fists and meeting Ren’s gaze with unwavering blood-thirst. “I hate you,” Akechi rasps, his face inches from Ren. “It’s not a crime to want to spend time with my boyfriend,” Akechi mutters, his perfected defense cracked under his affection for Ren.

“And I love you too. I can see you’re thinking about kissing me right now. You’re doing that thing with your lip,” Ren murmurs, nudging his nose against Akechi, his cockiness increasing with each of Akechi’s concessions.

“Do not,” Akechi snipped, though it lacked his usual bite, more like a toddler caught drawing on the walls. “Kiss me.” Ren took his chance, hands resting on Akechi’s hips, smoothly pressing his lips to Akechi’s.

His kiss gently insisted, persuading Akechi with his tongue.

Akechi’s persona may be weak to bless, but his body was vulnerable to something even more uncouth: Ren Amamiya. He melted into Ren, unable to deny the thief any spoils.

“I told you not to kiss me,” Akechi reprimands, a fondness in his eyes as he mindlessly leans in to kiss Ren again.

“Mhm, but your words rarely match your feelings. So, will you marry me?” Ren asked again, his thumb rubbing circles into Akechi’s hip.

“You wouldn’t change your last name.”

“You don’t want to be Amamiya Goro?” Ren pouted, nipping at Akechi’s neck, small puffs of air heating his scalp.

“No. And it’s not like you would become Akechi Ren.”

“It sounds weird. What about my other name? Would Kurusu fit your fancy?”

“Absolutely not. Akechi Akira isn’t any better either.”

“would you rather me be Akechi Joker?”

“Trash.”

“Mince words, why don’t you?”

“This just proves my point! Even if I wanted to get married and said yes, you wouldn’t take my last name.”

“So you are saying you want to get married? If you are worried about losing your last name, I will take it.”

“You don’t want that, and even if you did, that’s not all that makes me say no.”

“Then what else is there? What other reservation could you have?”

Akechi held his breath, Ren mindlessly nibbling at his neck. “Answer me,” Ren pressed, his hands roaming Akechi’s languid form.

“You’re playing dirty,” Akechi mocked, his book now discarded.

“We never fight fair. That’s fate. Do you think Yaldobaoth and Igor wanted us ever to fight fair? It's rigged.” Ren commented rhetorically, smug that he had Akechi where he wanted him.

“You’re such a scoundrel,” Akechi lamented, leaning into his touches, all reasoning leaving his consciousness.

“Mhm, sure,” Ren sighed, biting Akechi’s neck. “You still didn’t answer my question.”

“It’s because,” Akechi started, leaning to give Ren more access to his neck.

“Because?” Ren repeated, urging Akechi to continue his train of thought.

“I am scared. What if I hurt you?” Akechi concedes so softly Ren isn’t even sure he heard him right.

“I’m not so weak as to get hurt by you. No more than being shot in the head,” Ren soothes, kissing softly up Akechi’s neck to the junction of his ear: “I love you, even at your most broken. You may not trust yourself, but that’s okay. I can be your faith. I am the leader, after all,” Ren whispers, his lips brushing against Akechi’s earlobe.

“How can you even forgive me? Why would you even want to marry me? I killed Okumura and Wakaba too. I endangered Sae, and that’s not even all of it. The list of blood-stained on my hands is too much to name. How, Amamiya—Ren, how?”

“Simple.” Ren brushes Akechi’s hair, puffs of air warming his cheeks.

“Simple how? You can’t be so naive.”

“Simple, because I love you. Even Haru, Makoto, and Futaba have come to care for you. I may never fully forgive you, but losing you twice is even more unbearable.”

Ren stared deeply into Akechi’s tear-stained pupils, each word sinking into Akechi’s skin like a sharpened knife.

“How—“ Akechi choked, his whole body suspended in animation. “I killed people, Ren. I got away with it too. How can you be okay with something so deplorable like me? If you don’t want to be with me, you’ll get bored. They all do. I lose my use to everyone eventually.”

“When will you understand that I don’t want to use you? I don’t need you to kill for me. I don’t need you to be perfect. I want to love you. That’s all I want. I want you to let me love you. I want to steal your heart.”

“And that’s achieved by the archaic laws of marriage? That seems awfully selfish of you, seeking to change my heart.”

“I never said I was selfless. I am greedy, just like you. I am a possessive man, and I want your heart, Goro.”

“How violating and revolting,” Akechi hisses, but it seems more sad than anything else, pitiful almost. “I knew the leader of the phantom thieves couldn’t be trusted. I hate how you do this, how effortlessly you steal my desires repeatedly.”

Ren’s eyes widened, Akechi’s candid words catching him off guard. Compliments were few and far between. He much preferred to insult and derogate Ren. “I could say the same for you,” He smiled, pulling Akechi into a tender kiss, his heart fluttering.

“Detective Prince, Goro Akechi, you have lost yourself to revenge and anger. In doing so, you are blind to others' affections. As such, we will steal your desires and have you confess your twisted ideals with your mouth. The Phantom Thieves.” Ren smirks, his whole essence Joker.

“What a terrible calling card. You and Sakamoto should never be allowed to write them,” Akechi lies. Ren could feel Akechi’s pulse thunder under his lips, his heart a lie detector, always giving him away.

“I would say otherwise, your palace has gone on high alert, and your treasure made manifest, I know it,” Ren quips, kissing Akechi gently again, “And it looks like I stole your treasure.”

“I don’t feel myself having a change of heart,” Akechi drones, rolling his eyes. His heart is pounding harder with each breath, every irrational part wanting to give in. How dare he steal his desires so simply.

“Mmm, are you sure? I am certain I will get a yes if I ask again.”

“No,” Akechi says, the sound aborted, clearly not what he truly feels.

“Hmm, I don’t believe that. You want to marry me. I shall ask again, more properly this time.” Ren stands up, kneeling in front of him. “Goro Akechi, will you marry me?”

“Absolutely N—“ the words catch in his throat like he’s under some spell As if he has taken truth serum and can no longer deny what he wants. “Fine!” He shouts annoyedly, only words of agreement escaping his lips.

Ren kisses him eagerly, licking his lips like an untrained puppy dog, effusive with joy. Akechi should feel sickened, but he finds himself relenting, sharing—begrudgingly—in Ren’s excitement.

“How did you do that? I don’t have a palace and—“ Akechi pants, his breathing worn thin from Ren’s enthusiasm. He doesn’t get to finish his interrogation. Ren’s already smooching all over, making breathing, let alone talking, nearly impossible.

“Amamiya!” Akechi growls, pushing him away. “A calling card shouldn’t work on me.”

“Not in a typical sense, no, but you know it wasn’t my, as you would call it, ‘idiotic calling card.’ It was all you. It’s because you love me,” Ren snarked, far too satisfied with himself.

“You’re insufferable.”

“That’s ‘your insufferable.’”

“That’s grammatically incorrect.”

“Maybe, but I am your insufferable fiancé for the rest of your life.”

“What a frightening sentence.” Ren nodded, pestering his “unwilling” (willing) bride with kisses. He would never tire of kissing Akechi’s face.

“Stop slobbering on me like a dog! I will refuse again.”

“You wouldn’t do that. You can’t go back now, and you know that” Ren insists, marking Akechi’s face and neck with kisses and hickeys.

“My hand in marriage isn’t enough? Do you need to mark my whole face too? You are a mangy mutt.”

“As I said before, possessive.”

“You better have a good excuse when we visit the Sakuras tomorrow.”

“Why would we see Futaba and Sojiro tomorrow?”

“They are your only family—I guess mine too. Don’t you tell family news like this?”

“Yes,” Ren responds, paired with more aggressive bites, climbing lower, breaching the division of Akechi’s chest and collarbone, only his clothing stopping Ren from marking further.

“What will I ever do with you?” Akechi sighs, allowing Ren to mark as he pleases. It won’t hurt to spoil him for just a moment.

“Get me dog training lessons?” Ren offers sarcastically, ecstatic that Akechi sees his loved ones like family too, or more so, admitting as much.

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

“Were you attacked by a bear?” Futaba asks halfheartedly.

“Something like that,” Akechi responds, looking at Ren angrily.

“Ren’s like a mutt. Maybe I should call you that from now on,” Futaba snickers.

“Sorry,” Ren responds meekly, but just like Akechi, he doesn’t mean a word of it.

“As long as you’re being safe. I am glad you aren’t under my roof anymore,” Sojiro teases.

“Certainly,” Akechi smiles through grit teeth, and Ren knows he’s in for it now.

“Why are you here? I am sure Futaba didn’t invite you over.”

“That’s rude, Sojiro!” Futaba pouts, taking a bite of her half-finished curry. “I have invited Ren over.”

“Sure,” he laughs heartily, waiting for his adopted son to respond.

“Meet your son-in-law,” Ren deadpans, opting for the worst dialogue option he could muster.

“Oh, my God! You're getting married?” Futaba squeals in that feral screeching way like she just saw a particularly fascinating piece of code.

Sojiro’s eyes widen briefly before softening, “Welcome, just don't get into any trouble,” he reminds, knowing damn well they are trouble magnets.

“So, did you tell the other thieves yet? I bet they will flip their lid,” Futaba asks giddily.

“Uh, no, you're the first to know,” Ren responds, feeling Akechi’s death stare pierce his nape.

“Well, that won’t do!” Futaba scolds.

“It's not like we are hiding it or anything. Goro just refused to let anyone else see him like this.” Akechi’s glare became even darker, causing Ren to swallow. He may not make it to the wedding day.

“I got it! We should have an engagement party! I will even invite Zenkichi and Akane.”

“You hate parties.” Ren was careful to leave out that Akechi despised them just as much.

“Yeah, but it's fine if you’re there, and it's tradition.”

Ren nodded, looking at Akechi. He may be smiling, but he knows Akechi’s gun will meet his head once they are alone.

“Nyehee, I will make the arrangements with Sophia. You go tell the others.”

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

“Great, another errand. She’s come out of her shell, hasn't she?” Akechi comments thoughtfully, standing outside the door to Leblanc.

“Yeah, guess that's my fault,” Ren agrees. “It's not like it's a big deal we were going to tell them anyway,” Ren soothes, seeing how annoyed Akechi is at announcing their engagement.

“You owe me for this.”

“I always do.”

Notes:

I am returning to school for my senior year in 2 weeks. Wish me luck!

And as always, “Rattles cup for comments and Kudos, please.”