Work Text:
Final selection. They were finally here, Giyuu realised, they were here. Together. Him and Sabito.
It had taken a while to convince Urokodaki to let them go to the Final Selection because he was hesitant for reasons he refused to elaborate on. Perhaps it was because Makomo had died only last year and he was still feeling the effect of that, Giyuu didn’t know. Giyuu didn’t know Urokodaki was sick of sending children to their deaths year after year, and each year no one came back. Giyuu didn’t know that it would be the same this year, didn’t know only one of them would be coming back and he wouldn’t be the same when he did.
Giyuu was happy Sabito was with him. He was his best friend! Sabito was one of the only people he could trust, the other being Urokodaki (Makomo was one of them, but she was dead now). The lighter haired boy had already been training with their master for a few months when the Ex-Water Hashira took Giyuu in, a skinny little thing after months of traversing the land on his own after his sister was slaughtered by a demon and he was driven out of his hometown.
Urokodaki was a kind person but a harsh trainer, a harshness Giyuu wasn’t used to at all, a harshness Sabito was used to. His friend used to scoff whenever he saw Giyuu tearing up after a particularly merciless training session but offer him space on his futon, nonetheless, stroking a hand through his hair and murmuring reassuring’s words to him (just like his sister used to).
“You think Urokodaki-sensei will make us whatever we want when we come back?” Sabito asked as they waited around for the Final Selection to start.
“That would be nice.” Giyuu murmured quietly.
“I assume you want salmon with daikon?” Sabito raised an eyebrow expectantly.
“Yeah.” Giyuu nodded.
They would stick together during the Final Selection, that was the plan. Unfortunately, things rarely went to plan, especially when in dire circumstances such as these. Their plan went off the rails when Giyuu was smacked away by a demon that raced after him and Sabito was distracted by a massive, grotesque looking demon with many hands.
Giyuu struggled to hold his own against the demon attacking him, knowing that if Sabito were in his place this thing would already be dust. It was the thought of Sabito that spurred him onwards, encouraging him to finally slide his sword through the demons throat and watch it dissolve into nothingness. He stopped to breath in, clutching a hand to his chest as he struggled to catch his breath before he straightened and hurried back in the direction he came from.
The sight he saw was worse than anything he had seen in his nightmares, worse than his sister’s bleeding body because Sabito was mangled, and he was still alive. Giyuu tripped over his own feet in his haste to hurry to Sabito’s side, but the light haired boy’s eyes widened, and he opened his mouth to protest only to choke on his own blood.
Giyuu whipped around in the direction that Sabito’s limp had was pointing in and his blood ran cold at the sight of the most horrific demon he had ever seen, large and looming above him with gleeful eyes and the blood of many children coating its skin. “Another one of Urokodaki’s?” The demon cooed, it’s eyes landing on Giyuu’s fox mask, draped on the side of his head. “Wonderful, wonderful. I get a two for one.”
“You –“ Giyuu was frozen in fear, he didn’t know what to do. All these past seven days, Sabito was the one fighting, Sabito was the one wiping out almost every single demon on this godforsaken mountain while Giyuu tagged along like a useless piece of shit. He wasn’t worthy, he wasn’t worthy, but Sabito was, and he’d be damned if he left him be eaten.
A sudden wave of energy washed over Giyuu, and he hurried to Sabito, lifting him up and draping him over his back, grabbing his sword with his other hand and running. Perhaps it was a cowards move to run but he didn’t want to die. Actually, that wasn’t quite true, he didn’t want Sabito to die, so he had to get him away.
Giyuu’s chest was burning and every muscle of his screaming in pain as he skidded to a stop when he thought he was far enough away. He knew the sun would be rising soon, and they would finally be able to make it out of this place. Together, just like they had said they would.
He laid Sabito down and dropped to his knees by his side, trailing his eyes over the gaping wound in Sabito’s chest and the blood trickling down the side of his head, staining his peach coloured hair a deep crimson. “Sabi…to…”
“Gi..yuu…” Sabito rasped, barely getting the words out before he coughed again and blood dribbled down the side of his mouth, sliding down to his neck. “You’re safe?”
“I’m okay, I’m fine. But you’re not! Sabito, Sabito, you gotta hold on just for a little more, we’re almost done. The sun will be up soon, and we can go to the gathering and – and they’ll give us medicine and you’ll be okay! Then we can go home to Urokodaki-sensei and have salmon daikon –“ Giyuu heaved a breath, tears running down his cheeks as he placed both of his hands on Sabito’s wound in an attempt to staunch the blood flow.
“Cry…baby…” Sabito painted a weak smile on his face and the laugh that escaped Giyuu was a mixture of hysterical and a half-sob as more tears fell from his eyes. “Don’t cry.”
“Sabito, please… please!” Giyuu pleaded. “You gotta hold on, please.” His voice cracked as he spoke. One of Sabito’s hands lifted up weakly and he covered Giyuu’s blood (Sabito’s blood) stained ones with it.
“Giyuu…” Sabito said. “Giyuu.”
“You promised you’d never leave me, you promised!”
“I think – I think I might break that promise.”
“No, no, you can’t.” Giyuu shook his head.
“Giyuu, you’re… my best friend. My only… my only one.” Sabito stumbled through his words, inhaling deeply at times, his face twisted in pain. “I’m happy I was there for you these past few years… I’m happy I got to meet someone as kind as you.”
“Sabito, please don’t talk like that.” Giyuu sobbed.
“Listen… listen…” he repeated in a more insistent tone. “Please. Giyuu, I – I’m sorry I’m the one making you cry this time. I… I wish we could have more time together. I wish we could go home and have salmon daikon but… I died protecting people, protecting you and I wouldn’t change that.”
“Why? Why me? Why would you protect me? You’re dying now and it’s because of me! You’re better than me, you’re stronger. I’m just a scared little boy who always cries. You’re the prodigy, you could have helped so many people, Sabito.”
“Shut up.” Sabito’s voice turned sharp even through his pain. “That’s my best friend you’re badmouthing.”
“Sabito…”
“You’re strong too. Stay strong, don’t die. Giyuu, please don’t die. Keep fighting.” Sabito said insistently. “Promise me.”
“…”
“Promise!”
“I promise.” Giyuu whispered.
“Good.”
Sabito’s grip on Giyuu’s hand grew slack and Giyuu’s eyes widened as he saw it fall to the floor and Sabito’s breathing cease. His heart rate picked up as he fumbled to find a pulse point and it stuttered when he found nothing.
“Sabito? Sabito? Sabito! No, no, no!” Giyuu wailed, lifting Sabito’s upper body and cradling it to his chest as the sun began to rise, covering the land in a golden glow. “Sabito, please, please come back. Don’t leave me, don’t leave me all alone. You said we’d stay together.” He sobbed.
“We were going to stay together… we – we would pick our swords out and… and wear the same uniform and hunt demons together. And then we were going to go back to Urokodaki-sensei and eat dinner together as a family, so why did you have to go?”
Giyuu knew he couldn’t stay here much longer so he lifted Sabito’s body onto his shoulders once more and trudged to the gathering place. He would rather die than leave his best friends body in a place like this. He would bury him, and no one was going to stop him. When he arrived, he saw the place filled with a lot more people than he expected, and it was then that he learnt no one had died.
So Sabito was the only casualty. It was because of Sabito that no one else died. Was it wrong of Giyuu to wish Sabito had lived even if it meant someone had died in place? He wouldn’t really care.
Upon the ending of the ceremony, he chose the ore he wanted for his blade and excused himself. He wanted to lay Sabito’s body to rest as soon as he could, and he did. There was a cliff not too far from the Final Selection with a tree at the edge of it. Giyuu laid Sabito’s body down and dug his grave with his bare hands, ignoring the stinging in his fingers and palms as he scraped them against twigs and stones. When the hole was large enough, he stopped.
Kneeling down by Sabito’s body, he eased the kimono off his body and laid it by his side before lifting the body and laying it in the grave, then he deposited the dirt back on top. Sabito’s blade guard was bronze and stuck out starkly against the rest of the white sheath. Giyuu removed the guard and put it in his pocket before sticking the sword in the dirt and leaning it against the tree.
He used his own sword to carve Sabito’s name into the wood of the tree before he stepped back, bowed and left, his heart feeling heavier than it ever had.
---
Giyuu tried to cope.
He couldn’t.
For perhaps the first year of his life after Sabito’s death, he kept turning to someone no longer by his side only to realise there was no one there and blanch.
He had also not gone back to see Urokodaki since he left for the Final Selection. He sent a letter, informing him of what had happened, but he couldn’t bring himself to go visit. Not when it was his fault Sabito had died, not when Sabito was the better soldier, and he was the one who should have lived. No, he couldn’t face Urokodaki after that.
He knew he came off standoffish to other Demon Slayers, but he couldn’t find it in himself to care. he lacked the energy for almost anything other than slaying demons. Sabito had told him to stay strong and not die. He wasn’t dead but he also didn’t think he was living either. He wasn’t strong either. He’d come too close to death sometimes before his best friends voice rang through his ears, urging him to keep fighting and he would snap out of his daze.
Maybe he was intentionally putting himself in more danger, maybe it was subconscious because he didn’t really want to live in a world without Sabito. But he also knew Sabito would be furious if he had borderline killed himself.
Of course, his “stunts” brought him to the Butterfly Mansion many a time, and there he met the Kocho sisters. Kocho Kanae was the Butterfly Hashira, and her little sister Kocho Shinobu was another Demon Slayer. She teased him a lot, it reminded him of Sabito a little.
He got stronger as the years passed but the hole in his heart never healed, and he probably only got colder to his fellow soldiers. He knew the rumours started spreading even more after he rejected the offer for Hashira. The Master was respectful and left him alone for some time before asking once more. Giyuu didn’t say yes until the third time.
He went to visit Sabito’s grave every year on his death anniversary and whenever it was Sabito’s birthday. The area there was littered with dead flowers and various knickknacks that Giyuu bought because they reminded him of Sabito. He would sit there and talk for hours, reducing himself to tears every time.
He was trying to cope but he couldn’t. in the end, he was still a crybaby. Even if the only person he cried around was his dead best friend.
“You said you’d never leave me, Sabito. Why’d you leave me?”